//------------------------------// // Chapter 31 // Story: Borrowed Time // by Gambit Prawn //------------------------------// “Thank you for coming, everypony!” said the soccer coach mare. “I enjoyed seeing you hustle out there. I know I can’t coach you all, but I would love to see each and every one of you at practice next Saturday. Don’t be discouraged, especially if you’re just starting out. And even if you don’t decide to join us, I at least hope you all had a good time.” As we dispersed, I let out a sigh. The soccer itself was fairly basic, but being around so many foals for a whole day had worn me out. “Hey, Lua!” a familiar voice called out. I turned my head. “Oh, hey, Stardust—I think that’s your name, right?” That was close. It was too easy to forget that only a different manestyle, coloration and fake cutie mark served to distinguish my current persona from River Glade. “You got it,” Stardust replied. “What’s up?” “Oh, I just wanted to say that you’re really good. Have you been playing soccer for a long time?” “No, actually I just started,” I said. It was true but it a bit immodest. “Wow! That’s incredible,” Stardust cheered. “Umm… that’s actually not what I wanted to ask you…” I raised an eyebrow. “What’s there to be nervous about?” “Well, I was talking to Monocle, and Pink Diamond, a classmate of mine, told her that there was a filly that looked like a younger Luna. I know you told her you’re not related, but your names and appearances are so similar, so what’s the connection?” I glanced at the throng of ponies and was mildly surprised to see Monocle was also here. “Oh, it’s just an alternative rendering of the same name,” I finally explained. “I—I mean my parents chose it as a tribute to the night princess.” “That’s really cool that your parents remembered Princess Luna from before she came back from the moon. I’m sure that must have made her happy!” “Oh… yes,” I replied weakly, worried that I had made a subtle mistake. I quickly reviewed my explanation, trying to identify what might have stood out. “I’m probably overthinking it,” Stardust said dismissively. “It’s a nice name in any case.” “Thank you.” Stardust started shuffling her hooves. “Actually, that’s not what I wanted to say either…” Impatiently, I scanned the crowd of ponies exiting the field once more. I had taken my eyes off Squirt for only a few moments, and somehow I had lost him. “Umm… what I mean—what I wanted to say is that I think your mane is pretty. It really suits you. I looked to the side, examining my pigtails. It was a last minute suggestion from Star which I hadn’t thought of much. Having the girlish style pointed out, though, was slightly embarrassing. I opened my mouth to offer token thanks, but no words came. Stardust blushed. “What am I saying? I hope I’m not holding you up.” “It’s fine,” I responded quickly, still looking around. “Say, have you seen that white and blue unicorn colt? I have something I wanted to say to him.” “Who? You don’t mean Squirt do you?” “Yeah, that’s the one! Why?” Stardust’s face scrunched up as she thought about it. “How do I put this diplomatically?” “No need to be shy,” I prompted. “Well, I’ll only be this candid because you asked. Frankly, he’s sort of an antisocial loser.” I flinched in surprise. Wow, Squirt, you might be more self-aware than you know. That was exactly how Stardust sees you! “Why do you want to talk to him?” “Oh, he just seemed discouraged. I guess I just wanted to say something before he decides to quit.” Stardust smiled. “That’s thoughtful, Lua. Although, I do I think you’re wasting your time.” “You’re probably right, but I do want to at least try. I’ve had more fun with soccer than I would have thought, so I’d like to see him to give it another chance. “ “Oh, okay. I suppose that’s fine...” Just then, I noticed Squirt in the crowd and primed myself to run off towards him. However, the sudden emergence of an idea held me back. “Stardust, do you want to request to be on the same team?” “I’d love to, Lua!” If this declaration didn’t make me uncomfortable enough, she then pulled me into a hug. Perfect. If Stardust is on my team, Squirt might want to stay. In the middle of my strategizing, I began to find it strange that I was going through so much trouble for Latte’s sake, but I pushed this out of mind, reasoning I was helping Squirt as well. “All right, Stardust. Thank you. Hopefully we’ll be put on the same team.” She waved. “Bye, Lua.” I weakly returned the wave before galloping off to find Squirt again. When I finally did, he was with Coffee and clearly ready to go home. Coffee met my gaze, smiled and turned to her brother. “Squirt, I’m actually kind of thirsty. Do you want something from the concession stand?” she asked. “I’m okay with water. Sports drinks are nasty, and soda doesn’t really hydrate.” She took off, leaving me to face Squirt. “Hey,” I said. “Yeah, that’s what I had for breakfast,” Squirt said, unenthused. Realizing I had no connection to Squirt in this form, things got awkward really quickly. “Umm… that was a good practice, don’t you think,” I said, trying my hoof at small talk. “It was the only practice I’ve ever been to, so how would I know?” Squirt replied, impatient. I shuffled my hooves. “Okay, you’ve probably guessed that that’s not what I came over here to say. I—well, what I wanted to say was that you remind me a lot of myself when I first started. I was uncoordinated and hardly dexterous. I just wanted to quit. Fortunately, I had a friend that encouraged me, worked with me to get better. I’m still not great, but I’m at the point where I can enjoy soccer now. I’ve had so much fun that I don’t want you to give up on it too quickly. And I see more potential in you than I had to start with.” “That’s probably because my dad’s an athlete,” Squirt explained. “Even if I do have potential to be good, I don’t want to invest my time when I already know it’s not going to be my thing.” I smiled, refusing to give up. “I was skeptical too. I mean, I don’t even know what this firework cutie mark means, but even without a special talent for soccer, I’ve enjoyed getting better.” Squirt shook his head. “No, I don’t mean my thing in a cutie mark sense; I mean I’m allergic to exercise.” I paused to consider that this was one aspect where I differed significantly from Squirt. “You know what they say: make time for exercise now, or make time for illness later,” I tried. “Yeah, I’ve heard that one before,” said Squirt. Before using my secret weapon, I decided on another approach: ”You need a green activity, right? You’re going to have to exercise at camp regardless. Wouldn’t you want to build up some stamina first?” Squirt shrugged. “They may have taken away chess, but I’m determined to find the least strenuous green activity. Maybe I’ll do basic swimming. I can just paddle in place.” I sighed. No helping it then. Though I hate to manipulate him like this. “Well I think it’s best to have something to do with friends,” I explained. “Friends are what makes it fun.” I paused to feign thinking about it. “I mean, I met a filly named Stardust…” Squirt tried to act disinterested, but his countenance visibly changed. “Yeah, Stardust. I think we’re going to be good friends, so we decided to be on the same team together!” “Stardust is here?” Squirt finally asked, mentally checking back in. “Oh, you know her?” I asked, mostly to reinforce the idea that I was a different pony. “Y—yeah…” Squirt stammered. To my slight relief I saw Coffee trotting towards us. She was clearly taking her time, but as I saw it, my job was done. “Nice to meet you...umm… “ “Squirt,” the unicorn colt said. “Yeah, Squirt. That’s right. I guess I’ll see you around.” He didn’t respond, and I chuckled awkwardly as I backed away. “So I see you made a new friend, Squirt,” said Coffee. “Yeah right,” he said. “That peppy filly talked my ear off while you were gone.” Peppy!? The label stung. I know I was being more outgoing than River Glade, but I wasn’t being super sociable I didn’t think. I looked up at the cloud behind which I suspected Star was hidden. I wanted reassurance, but I couldn’t be seen with her right now without raising suspicions. As planned, I walked several blocks before ducking out of sight and putting my River Glade colors on. I had actually become accustomed to my new ability rather quickly. In less than a week I had already grown to trust it. It didn’t come undone easily, and I never found myself changing colors accidentally. As Star landed next to me, I instantly realized I had forgotten to undo my pigtails. “I know. I know...” As I did so, it occurred to me that I hadn’t shown much reluctance to accepting the style. Though I dismissed the thought for the moment and opted to report to Star instead. “Well, that didn’t quite go as planned, but I at least think there’s a chance Squirt will participate,” I said. “Oh? Didn’t his parents already make that call for him?” “Ponyfeathers. That’s right. I don’t know why I tried so hard when the decision was out of his hooves. I could’ve just said hi to establish myself.” “No, I like your approach,” said Star. “You helped provide some motivation to actually want to play. Wasn’t that your objective from the start?” “Latte just wanted me to be his friend… again. But when I actually trotted up to him that was a bit harder than anticipated.” “Hmm…” Star said. “I know you don’t like hearing this, but seeing how he behaves around fillies he doesn’t know is a perspective you’re not used to.” “That’s—it can’t be that different, can it?” “Regardless of underlying courtship subtext,” Star began ominously, “he also has a general lack of familiarity with fillies. By how you’ve described him, I wouldn’t expect him to interact with them very often.” I felt a chill as I pondered this new rift between myself and Squirt. It was only potential separation for now, but how long could I remain a colt in his eyes? “Let’s talk about something different,” I prompted “So did you enjoy your trip to the weather factory today?” Stardust asked. “What else can I say? It was amazing. From the cloud fluffer, to the lightning machine, to the rainbows being mixed by hoof, all of it was impressive.” Star smiled. “It was pleasant to see your eyes light up like a normal foal’s might.” I was prone to disagree with this, but her observation didn’t lack merit. The pony concept of weather was completely new to me. “By the way, you never did explain to me why you shooed me off the cloud mattress,” I said. “Only pegasi can walk and lie on clouds. You didn’t go through it, and I didn’t want anypony to pick up on that.” “Are alicorns able to?” I asked to confirm my hypothesis. “Yes. I’m no expert, but I think this means you’re closer to becoming an alicorn now.” I sighed. Star seemed to pick up on my reticence and changed the subject yet again. “So are you excited for the big day tomorrow?” “Oh yeah, Annuity’s birthday party?” I would have been lying if I said I had forgotten; perhaps I just didn’t want to think about it. “If it’s any consolation, you probably won’t get much face time with Annuity herself.” “How do you figure?” “Well, from what you’ve told me, the guest list is huge. Besides, she’ll want to spend most of her time with her actual friends, rather than the ponies who were only invited by her mother.” “That’s one good point I guess. I just hope the Anti-Annuity Alliance doesn’t drag me into anything stupid. I appreciate the cause, but I wouldn’t trust anything Stardust comes up with to thwart Annuity. I’m not even sure I want to undermine her party; I mean, birthdays are supposed to be a big deal here, aren’t they?” “They weren’t on your homeworld?” “Not really. We didn’t have a cake or party or anything like that. The only real tradition of ours on our birthdays was getting our height measured. Sometimes I would get new shoes, but that’s it.” “That’s a shame,” Star mused. “It’s not that big of a deal; I don’t need sympathy. We Rhods are generally scarce on possessions.” “It’s not just about the presents, though they can be a part of it. It’s about the memories of growing up. In my case, it still fills me with joy to think back on some of my foalhood birthday parties.” “Well that’s something I won’t need to worry about anymore. After all, years aren’t even the same here. At this point, I don’t think it’s possible to calculate my birthday.” “Challenge accepted!” came a perky voice. I nearly flinched and couldn’t help but jump back a step at the unexpected presence behind me. Star giggled as realization dawned on me. “Pinkie Pie, how’d you get here?” I asked. “By the train,” she said simply. I didn’t find her answer convincing, so I asked it in a different way: “What are you doing here in Canterlot anyhow?” She picked up her shopping bags. “Well, right now, I’m stocking up on confetti, glitter and magical banners. The Party Pony Plateau has an amazing selection!” “So you didn’t teleport here for the sake of comedic timing?” I asked, suspicious. Pinkie giggled. “No, Silly. I can only do that when my Pinkie meter fills up to one-hundred percent, so I try to use it sparingly.” “Well, my birthday’s in late July…” I stated. “July? What’s that?” Pinkie asked. “Yeah, good luck. You’re going to need it,” I cautioned. “Okee dokey,” said Pinkie. “I’m going to check out Rarity’s new boutique. Hmm… is there any difference between a store and a boutique, or is boutique just a word Canterlot ponies use to talk fancy? See you, Alice. Bye, Star.” “See you later, Pinkie,” Star said. “Oh yes, see you around,” I hastily added. She waved at us, walking backwards until she rounded a corner. I looked at Star, perplexed. She just laughed, and we returned to the castle in relative silence. We were near my room when it finally hit me: “Hey, Star. I won’t be able to make the Junior Royal Guards meeting tomorrow.” “Yeah?” Star said. “I can’t keep track of your schedule for you, you know?” “I know. I realized the schedule conflict before, but I didn’t realize that I forgot to say something to Bulwark.” “That’s thoughtful of you,” Star praised. “Do you know where Bulwark lives?” “I don’t…” The pegasus smiled. “Well luckily I do. I can run a message to her.” “Good. I don’t really mind missing this session since we’re not going to fight at all; though I’d be lying if I said the alternative was more appealing.” “I get it. What does surprise me is how well you’ve taken to meeting your social obligations as a pony.” I cocked my head. “That’s actually easy for me. I’ve been disciplined from a young age to do what I need to do. It’s just that my social obligations have replaced my obligation to maintain readiness.” “I guess that makes sense,” Star said as she followed me into my room. “Say, is that your present for Annuity?” she asked, pointing. “Yeah, you saw me buy it, right?” “I know that! What I’m saying is you haven’t wrapped it yet?” “Uh… no?” “Well leave it to me! There’s a party supplies closet in the castle. I’ll be right back, and we can wrap it together.” With that Star galloped off. What a bother… I thought. Despite being a pony for as long as I had, I still didn’t grasp the point of such frivolous exercises. Was that moment of suspense before the gift is unwrapped really worth the trouble? I sighed. I simply didn’t get it. All told it had been a fairly uneventful week. I returned to school and completed the writing assignment. Attending Day Court had been illuminating all things told, so I had no shortage of things to write about in my essay. We rehearsed the play a few more times, and by now, everypony had started to learn their lines. I was in the worst spot, having several boring monologues about policy. Fortunately, Ms. Fizzle saw it perfectly appropriate in the context of the play for me to read from a scroll in front of me for these parts. Outside of school, I had had another session with my magic teacher. It was mostly more of me straining myself with little to show for it though. Teaching Moment said I was making progress, but I had a sneaking suspicion this had to do with ponies’ inability to give constructive criticism. I had also gone shopping with Star to pick out Annuity’s birthday present earlier that week. It cost me ten bits after paying for some customization, but I think it was worth it for the message it would send. Star tried to convince me to get something for myself, but I didn’t want to spend loosely; besides, I couldn’t think of anything I wanted. My dreams had also been normal, if a little too silly for my liking. There had been no trace of the brown stallion, House Keeper, that other filly, or my sister. The latter was somewhat disappointing, as I had come to believe that our psychic connection was genuine. Meanwhile, I was running out of time for that blasted cutie mark poem. I had spent a good hour staring at a blank page before giving up again. As for Prench class, I completed a worksheet of ninety-two regular “er” verbs I needed to conjugate. I was fairly certain of my own mastery of the topic, but I could tell some ponies had trouble either grasping the point of the exercise or difficulties assimilating the pattern. After wrapping the gift with Star, I tried to salvage what remained of the Annuity-free portion of my weekend, but I ran into the familiar problem of not knowing what to do. I knew Star wouldn’t let me exercise, as I had already hit my body’s current limit. I considered visiting the castle’s library to pick something out, but my limited experience with pony literature had left me unimpressed. Giving up, I brushed my teeth and made my way to bed. There were just some days where a good night’s sleep was all I had to look forward to in the next twenty-four hours. I awoke relatively early and made my way to the cafeteria. I had expected to need Star to drag me out of bed on this particular morning, but I never was one to sleep more than needed. For a change of pace, I made my way to a cafeteria on one of the upper floors. I had made the recent discovery that the various mess halls had different menus, so I thought it’d mix-up my morning and offer some variety. Upon arriving, I realized that the characterization of housing preferences of guards that I had heard was shockingly accurate. Pegasi were in the clear majority, while I had to really look to locate any earth ponies. Meanwhile, unicorns didn’t really seem to care where they lived and ate. Pondering this to distract from my inevitable social outing, I enjoyed my orange, toast and oat cereal in peace. At least for a while… “Hey! I know you!” a slim unicorn filly shouted, accosting me. “You’re River Glade, aren’t you?” “Yes?” I offered. It took me a moment to recognize this filly, but somehow I remembered her from Career Day. She hadn’t left much of an impression truthfully, and I strained to recall her name. “I thought I recognized you. I’m—” “Blue Horizon, right?” She hopped, gave a big smile and twirled in place. “You remember me! I’m so happy!” I tried to keep my own expression from hardening, as I had begun to suspect I had another Pink Diamond on my hooves. Without warning, she sat next to me and started eating. “Ponies tell me I don’t stand out much, but I’m hoping to change that.” “Yeah, you’re doing an okay job at that,” I lied. Truth be told, this filly would firmly be in the twelfth and final position if I were to rank all the exchange students on charisma. I smirked to myself. Call it the Cotton Candy Award. “So River, do you have a rival?” I gave her the weirdest look I could muster. “You know, like someone you can compete with, butt heads with and grow stronger together?” “I know what you mean, but it’s just such a random thing to ask,” I explained. She blushed slightly. “Sorry, I probably should have asked you about what you like, or about your cutie mark first. I got a little carried away. I—” “No, by all means, let’s talk about rivals instead,” I quickly interjected. “Let’s see, I did have someone I butted heads with a lot with. His name was Bruce—err… Bruiser I mean. We competed in sports, academics and when we sparred it was always that much more intense.” “You fought with each other?” “Uhh.. like in the Junior Royal Guards I mean. Nothing serious.” “And your rival was a colt? That seems a bit strange for a colt and a filly to be rivals. Are you sure you didn’t like him?” “Nothing of the sort!” I said forcefully. “Yes, he was a colt, an…. and I’m a filly, but there was nothing there.” That was close… I thought. I would need to be careful when trying to ponify experiences of my previous life. “But what really makes me curious is that you talk about it like it was a long time ago for you, but you look younger than me…” I laughed nervously. “Call it a poor choice of words. I don’t know how you got that…” Forget Pink Diamond; she’s more like another Pestle with this insight!” I was then hit with a sobering bit of recollection: Bruce had died in battle—shortly before I had arrived in Equestria. It’s probably best that I omitted that part… “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable,” Blue consoled, studying my expression. “Do you miss him and your home? I know I do sometimes.” “Don’t worry about it. More than that, I just don’t understand what made you want to talk about rivals.” She chuckled half-heartedly. “It’s kind of silly, but I have reasons. Basically, since I have trouble making friends being nice the normal way, I thought I’d try something different. Basically, if I can get someone to compete with me, I’ll at least get their attention.” “I’m not following…” “Don’t you think that if I can get someone to butt heads with me and strive to beat me, those strong emotions might bear fruit of respect? That it’d be a solid foundation for an enduring friendship?” She explained enthusiastically. “I got the idea from my favorite manega.” “I don’t think that’s how it works...” “Well I’ve decided to try it in any case. Besides, it’s not like I can’t try to make friends the normal way at the same time,” Blue Horizon stated with conviction. I shrugged. “So what? Are you just going to pick a fight with a random pony?” She finished chewing her bite of cereal and thought about her answer before responding: “No, I actually have a pony in mind. She’s real driven, but she has just enough of a serious disposition that I think I could get under her skin.” Turning back to my food, I mumbled, “Good luck with that. I’ll be rooting for you.” She pumped a hoof in the air. “Thanks. I’m doing to have to work hard to be able to outdo her, though. She seems like a tough customer for sure.” “You can do it,” I encouraged weakly. “All right! I’m excited now. I’ll refine my technique!” “Yeah.” “I’ll work on my stamina.” “Yeah?” She stood up on her chair. “I’ll practice my dribbling every day.” “Huh!?” Wait… don’t tell me. “I’ll be the best athlete on the pitch!” Please no... “And I’ll roast that Lua with the heat of competition!” She was now on top of the table. It took several long moments for her to realize everypony in the room was staring at her. She giggled meekly and hopped off the table. “Well I guess it’ll be something like that. Thanks for letting me bounce some ideas off you, River.” “I… didn’t do much.” “Wish me luck!” “Sure…” With that she winked and dashed out of the cafeteria. So now I have a soccer rival. Lovely. And so, Annuity’s birthday party arrived sooner than I would have liked. As planned, I met up with Beakington, Stardust, Style, Jill and Thaumaturgical at the Soda Shoppe. It was a bit out-of-the-way for me, but this let me kill some time traversing the city with Star, which wasn’t so bad all things considered. I hadn’t even considered trying to look my best, but I immediately realized I would be underdressed. Beakington and Jill wore the same clothes in which they had gone to petition Celestia. Stardust and Style, meanwhile, had done their manes in opposing whorl patterns, which were emphasized by Bubble Bauble’s Jewelry. Comparatively Thaumaturgical didn’t do much, but he still was wearing a little dress shirt and tie. Stardust had prepared a short presentation for us, borrowing an easel from the store owner to display some crude drawings. The best part was an impressively haughty stickpony version of Annuity. I was too distracted by Stardust’s art to pay much attention to the plan itself, but that turned out to matter very little. As we walked through the gates of Annuity’s estate, my companions’ eyes lit up. It was as if Annuity’s home had been transformed into a carnival. There was a ferris wheel, food stands, performers, games, and even a zeppelin circling above. “WHOA! That waterslide is huge,” Thaumaturgical said with childish enthusiasm while pointing. “Look! Face painters!” Style exclaimed out. “I want to get cat whiskers!” “Do I smell kettle corn?” Beakington thought aloud, as I smelled the same. I heard a bounce as a familiar pony entered my field of vision. “Hi, River! I didn’t expect you to be here,” said Pinkie Pie. “Ohh! Are these your friends? Hi! I’m Pinkie Pie, it’s nice to meet all of you!” “Likewise,” Beakington said, unsure. ‘Here are a couple of schedules for you all!” she said, hoofing over to each of us what looked like a small restaurant’s menu. “I highlighted all of the must-see events in yellow!” Turning to the events page, I was unsurprised to find that every event was in yellow, even the magic show featuring “The Great and Powerful Trixie.” Before I could say anything, Pinkie continued, “But, if we’re talking an event that you really really really can’t miss, it’s the Countess Coloratura concert at six. Her whole act has changed; it’s really exciting.” I finally began to process everything as I looked over the massive slate of events and attractions. It was essentially wide-open, and each guest could create their own experience. My companions picked up on this and had split up when I wasn’t looking. “So, what are you going to do first?” Pinkie asked with a smile. “Beats me,” I said. “More importantly, Pinkie, I didn’t expect to see you here.” “Why wouldn’t I be here, silly? I help put on Annuity’s birthday party every year.” I was awestruck. “You mean, you coordinated all of this yourself?” Pinkie’s smile grew. “Well, there are about half-a-dozen other party ponies that helped me, but I am the one that got Countess Coloratura to come.” “Oh well that’s neat,” I replied weakly, not knowing who she kept talking about. “It’s a really fun job!” said Pinkie. “It pays well, too. With all these bits, I have the budget to make all my parties super fun for the rest of the year!” This just confused me even more. She was getting paid to put on parties, but she funded them with her own bits? I opened my mouth to ask, but I halted when it occurred to me it would be rather insensitive and immature to ask about her compensation. “Pinkie, it’s your turn at the dunk tank now!” a tall, orange stallion with curly brown hair called out. “Okay, be there in a jiffy, Cheese! Well, I gotta go now. See you around, River.” “Yeah, see you…” I had known that planning parties was her job, but actually seeing her hard at work was refreshing. Looking around, admiring her work, I found her esteem in my eyes growing. Having lost the rest of the AAA, I started to wander around. Weaving between food stands, I sampled all sorts of delicious smells. However, I was never one to snack so soon after a meal, so I resisted for the moment. I kept walking through the festival, making turns at random. Despite having my good sense of direction, I thought I had mistakenly backtracked at several points. This was not the case; Annuity’s estate was really that big. Determined to prove my navigation wasn’t faulty I tried to take a shortcut to the entrance. Instead, I was met by a dead-end in the form of an inflatable bounce house. Its size was to scale with the rest of my surroundings, and it easily three storeys high. Huh… don’t know how I missed something that big coming up to it. “Hey, River!” I heard right as I turned my back. I completed my turn in place to face a pony I had now seen twice in two days. “Oh, hey, Monocle. I didn’t know you knew Annuity.” The unicorn filly smiled. “My parents are friends of her parents. It makes us acquaintances of sorts. This is my first year attending in a while, but it’s always a good time. How did you find your way here, River? I didn’t think you’d be in her social circle.” I told her that her mom invited my entire class. “Oh, well I guess that’ll do it,” said Monocle. “She’ll do that if Annuity doesn’t invite enough ponies from her class.” “Well enough about Annuity,” I said a little too enthusiastically. “Did you bring Igloo with you?” “No, I didn’t. Even if Annuity would’ve allowed pets, I probably would have still left him in the castle.” “Yeah, I understand. It’d be easy to lose him here.” “Actually, that’s not it,” Monocle explained. “The truth is that Igloo really likes cotton candy, and I wouldn’t want him to run off and eat all of it.” Recalling something, I turned my head to the right. Sure enough there was a stand giving out “cotton candy” in our immediate vicinity. Considering it was at least the third such stand I had seen, I found it highly unlikely that a single lizard could threaten the supply, but I kept that estimation to myself. “Well, see you around, Monocle. I’m going now,” I told her, waving as I backpedaled. “Wait!” As I faced her, confused she seemed to wilt a bit. “Uh, I didn’t mean to be so forceful, but I wanted you to know that we’re playing Bunny Tag in here.” “Bunny Tag?” “Yeah, you hop around on your back hooves and then you run away from the pony that’s it.” “Is that really any different from regular tag?” I asked, skeptical. Monocle thought about it for a moment and blinked. “Not really, but when you have a bounce house this big you may as well have fun with it. So, you in?” I shrugged. “Well, I guess I do want to see what it looks like inside…” An hour of bouncing later, I had really gotten into it. The outside of the bounce house didn’t do it justice. It really did have three storeys. There were ramps to go up to the higher floors and slides to go down. I chased Monocle, Best Jeans, Silver Saucer, Folded Napkin and other foals who were apparently a part of Annuity’s expanded social circle. I liked to think I had an advantage of having once been a biped, but it didn’t make me any faster. Still, at least it meant that hopping on my back hooves felt somewhat natural. In a different state of mind, I might point out how it was unsafe to chase each other up the ramps and down the slides, but at the moment, I didn’t care. There was some technique to the game as well: the floor of the structure was so springy that everyone had to be careful to not bounce straight up and become a sitting duck. I was bothered by the thought that this was a rather childish activity, but considering I had never had such a thing on Rhod, I at least had the argument that it was a novel experience. Finally, the game came to an end as I hopped on Monocle’s withers and sent us both tumbling to the floor and up again. We had lost a couple of participants, and the remaining foals were panting, so we judged the game to be over. “Well, that was more fun than I thought it would be,” I confessed to Monocle. “Yeah that was a pretty fun game. I’m glad I came up with it,” said Monocle. “Another made-up variant of tag? Is making up games common in Equestria—err… I mean in the rest of Equestria?” “Of course!” said Monocle. “I’m always looking for new ways to have fun!” I put a hoof to my chin and pondered the creative tendencies of ponies. On the surface, it seemed like it could be nothing but a good thing. The only counterpoint I could come up with was that with so many new variants, no set of rules would become standard. I shook my head. What am I even thinking about these days? Ponies make up games. I don’t need to critique everything. I thought. On the other hand, it occurred to me that trying to point out illogical pony things helped me remain somewhat human inside. Lost in thought, I collided with a large earth pony colt. He was somewhere between Daybreak and Bulwark in stature. As he cocked his head to look at me, I had a flashback to my first day of Equestria: escalating tensions, a pointless feud for the sake of principle, a power that had defined me stripped away… “Sorry,” he said in a baritone. “No, it was completely my fault,” I replied. With that he nodded and walked off. Oh how much I’ve been changed. I had to think that not picking fights would be nothing but a good thing, but at the same time, I missed the days where I had a firm set of beliefs informing my every action. “River? What are you doing? You’re holding up the line,” said Monocle. “Huh?” I looked up at a server mare. She was manning a cart with a heated compartment where it looked like twisted pastries were slowly gyrating. “What can I get you young ladies?” she asked. “Uhh....” “I’ll have a cinnamon pretzel with cheddar dip,” Monocle ordered, thanking the mare as she accepted her snack. “And you, Miss?” “Uhh… I don’t know…” I said, looking to defuse the awkward situation. “What do you have?” “We have plain, salted, cinnamon, pizza and asiago. And for dips we have guacamole, cheddar, Amarecan, ranch, spicy, olive oil, and Equestrian.” I smiled weakly. “You know, on second thought I think I won’t—” “She’ll have a salted pretzel with olive oil!” Monocle announced. “Coming right up,” said the server mare. As the two of us walked away, I raised my brow at Monocle. “Why’d you do that?” “Even if you don’t want one I’ll eat it. I love soft pretzels!” “Is that what this is called?” I asked. “What!? You’ve never had a pretzel before?” “No?” “You’ve just gotta try it; it’s really good!” I hesitated for a moment, but then I realized how pleased I had been with Equestrian food so far. Cautiously, I took a nibble and was met with a wonderful, pillow-like texture. The salt meshed perfectly with the rich taste, and by the time I swallowed, I was already sold. I smiled at Monocle, but my expression soon became sullen. “Is there something wrong?” the filly asked. “Oh, it’s nothing. But I just realized I’m actually having fun at Annuity’s birthday party.” Having nothing else to do, I followed monocle inside Annuity’s home proper. We said hello to a butler at the door before turning to the right and entering a large parlor. “Ta-da!” Monocle said as we entered. “Is that a great surprise or what?” Mahjong. I almost laughed, but Monocle had been so earnest that I didn’t want to rain on her parade. “Err, yeah, how about that,” I said. “Don’t you play mahjong, River? “Most fillies do like—mphf…” ” I felt Annuity’s piercing gaze and turned my head meekly to try and meet it. “Monocle, could you repeat that?” Annuity asked, coldy. “Yeah, most fillies are, and I get what you mean: because I hang out with Stardust and Sunny Style, who are fillies you think I might pick it up. But no, it’s just not for me.” “But River doesn’t that imply you’re not— I quietly shushed Monocle. My heart started pumping hard. I had completely forgotten the potential danger of letting school ponies, who knew me as a colt, meet exchange ponies, who knew me as a filly. “So how about Annuity’s hand? Pretty nice, huh?” I said, trying to laugh it off. Annuity gave me the stink eye. “Not that I would know or anything,” I offered in my defense. “I barely know how to play.” Apparently satisfied, Annuity turned her attention back to the game and said, “Don’t distract me now. It’s bad enough that my mom had to invite you.” I smiled. That’s the Annuity I know and sort of tolerate. Thinking for a moment, Annuity set down her 7-pin. “A bold move,” Monocle whispered to me while sucking a lollipop she had picked up on the way. “Annuity foregoes the easier meld to finish in order to go all-in with her sanshoku. If she can pon the chun, that will make up for the loss of 1 han, and she’ll have the flexibility to call the missing tiles. Considering that the kamicha, Bubble, is probably going for a souzu hon’itsu, she’ll have no need for the 2-pin and 4-man that Annuity is looking for.” “Wow, I actually understood some of that,” I lamented. “Hey, you two,” Granite called out to us, gesturing to one of the other mahjong tables. “I’m done if one of you wants to fill in.” “No thanks,” Monocle said. “I’m happy just standing behind ponies and kibitzing.” “Kibtizing? What’s that?” “It’s a term used in chess as well,” said Iron Jill from behind me. “It basically means a spectator talking about a game while it happens, usually within earshot of the players.” “Oh, hey, Jill. Where have you been?” “The shooting gallery,” Jill explained. “I won this, but it doesn’t fit me. Here.” She tossed me a mask in Annuity’s likeness. I turned it over in my hoof, examining it. “Wow this really does look like her. Neat!,” I said, putting on the mask which mimicked Annuity’s typically smug expression. I imagined if I turned my colors to Annuity’s I would look just like her. “Surprise!” came three voices in sync.” I turned around and saw two mares and a stallion. Annuity heard this and turned around towards them. “Cleft! Magenta! Felicity! You came!” She was positively beaming as she rushed towards them. Somehow the three of them managed to all hug her at once. “Of course we wouldn’t miss our good friend’s party,” Cleft said as he petted her. “Friend?” I blurted out. Isn’t he a bit old to be friends with a filly? “Of course,” Cleft answered. We graduated Canterlot First seven years ago. “But we’d never forget our leader, with whom we spent over fifteen years in school.” “Yeah, what kind of blockhead are you?” Annuity asked. “Oh,” I said weakly, pausing to consider the implications. I suppose with how ponies aged this was bound to happen. After all, I was in school with ponies who were biologically almost twice my age. I guess this is what it’ll look like if I get involved romantically with Bulwark. I blushed. Wait, why am I thinking about that? Still, as she chatted with her old friends, I saw a new side to Annuity, a genuine one. One not dependent on putting others down. I quickly grew tired of watching Monocle watch mahjong, so I headed outside once more. It was easy to forget that it was only the mid-afternoon. Walking without any particular direction, it didn’t take long to come across something familiar. “Donut Dawn?” I said aloud. “Oh, you, you’re that filly that was at Career Day, right?” the stallion asked, leaning over his contraption. “I’m not a filly,” I insisted. “Oh? I’m sorry, little guy,” he said, somewhat disingenuously. “How about some pizza to make up for it?” “Should you really be using a patented machine when you’re still busy with an infringement lawsuit over it? You know, just because you invalidated one set of claims doesn’t mean you’re in the clear.” “It’s fine,” he said, chuckling. “I only need to win, right?” “A bit naive, but I’ve got to respect your resolve. So how does this thing work, anyway?” I asked before he could inquire into the source of my additional knowledge of his legal situation—interested, I had asked Celestia for more details earlier that week, in lieu of a friendship lesson. “The driving principle is using thaumic coils for selective localized heating. This allows the cheese to melt at the ideal temperature, while adhering it to only a single side of the dough. It also allows for the dough to rise without overheating the cheese. Most important however, are the matter template crystals which enable the mixing arm to knead everything into the perfect shape. Otherwise, you’d get something like a pizza taco at best and pizza soup at the worst.” “I guess that makes sense,” I said, listening carefully. Despite the magic jargon thrown in, it still made more sense to me than filly mahjong party games did. I didn’t quite know where to take the conversation from there, but fortunately, Donut was quickly distracted by a special request for anchovy pizza. It didn’t occur to me until later that evening that ponies were okay with at least one kind of meat. He still did remember to serve me. Honestly, one bite of the savory goodness was enough to convince me that there would be a lot of money at stake in their patent fight. “Yahoo!” Zephyr Zap cheered, sliding down a five-lane, three-storey waterslide. I might have been happy to see her if I hadn’t inadvertently wandered into the splash zone. “Oh, sorry, Annuity. It’s kind of just instinct to flutter my wings when I’m excited. I didn’t mean to soak you.” “Zap, it’s me,” I said pulling the mask over my hidden horn. “Teehee. That mask is pretty convincing. I’m still sorry for getting you wet though.” “No problem. I’m the one who blithely wandered too close to the waterslide. Still, I thought you’d be hanging out with Annuity since it’s her party and all.” “I know, right? That’s what I’ve been telling myself too. But the party outside is just so rocking! I haven’t even done half of what there is to do yet! Why would I go inside and play mahjong? Even if I knew how to play, I could do that any old time.” “I have to agree with you there. We fill—err, I mean, fillies have some weird fads, don’t they?” Zap didn’t respond and merely smiled. “So are you gonna take a turn on the waterslide? The line’s not that long. Besides, you’re wet anyway now.” “Umm… I think I’ll pass. I’ve had my fun with building-sized inflatable structures for the day.” “Okay, do you want to look around together, then?” I shrugged and let Miss Popular lead the way. “Might as well.” First, she led me to the dance floor. I had no clue how little horses were even supposed to dance, but it was easy enough to copy Zap. From my observations, pony dancing was about shuffling one’s hooves in time while swaying one’s hips and neck. At least nopony called me out for doing it wrong. If I had any complaint it was that the music was a bit too happy for my liking. What I did realize was that Pink Diamond really was, in fact, a good dancer. I couldn’t point to anything that made her stand out, but she really knew how to move to the tempo of the music. She was even able to adjust to different styles of dance as the songs changed. After that, Zap and I played some of the games. We bobbed for apples, which was very hard considering how small my mouth was; participated in the horseshoe toss, which was about throwing accuracy more than power; and even had the privilege of dropping Annuity’s father, a surprisingly jolly stallion, into the dunk tank. When we were finished, Zap practically dragged me to the Countess Coloratura concert, telling me, as Pinkie did, that I simply couldn’t miss it. If I hadn’t fully grasped how over-the-top this party was, the fact that Annuity could host hundreds of ponies for a mid-air concert on the blimp would have cemented it. The music was better than the dance music, but that wasn’t saying too much. Coloratura’s songs had such a catchy beat that I wondered if becoming a pony had made me more susceptible to such things. As for the lyrics, they were strangely reminiscent of a stream of consciousness soliloquy, reflecting on the singer’s past actions and taking away the epiphany that she should remember where she came from. That at least I could agree with. Although Annuity apparently didn’t like it, which was a bonus. Apparently the so-called Countess used to put on a show with a lot more glitz and glamor. The acoustics of the blimp weren’t exactly great either, but that could have been a product of the lousy seats—standing room, rather—that Annuity had allocated to the school ponies her mother had invited. To cap off the performance, the pony pop star brought Annuity on stage and led the crowd in singing happy birthday to her. I could tell Annuity was basking in the attention like a pampered kitten on her owner’s lap. From there, the blimp landed and we discovered that the party ponies had been busy while we were gone. Four massive dining room tables had been set up. Granted, some ponies had left, leaving gaps, but the seating capacity was still immense. Dozens of different entrees and appetizers were available on a fifth large table. To avoid an absolute mess of hundreds of ponies snaking between one another to reach a certain item, the party had a large staff of waiters on hand. I didn’t know if Annuity’s family retained this many servants, but the fact that a regular staff of this size was conceivable said a lot. By coincidence, I ended up only a few spots away from Stardust and Style. “This isn’t good. We’ve got to pull ourselves together,” Stardust had said. “But I’m having fun,” Style replied. “I know. That’s the problem. Very crafty that Annuity.” I snickered. After all, I was familiar with their dilemma, albeit I had given in more easily. Deciding not to greet them, I placed my order. Since I was unsupervised, I realized I could probably get away without eating any sugar, so I availed myself of that option. I ordered some gourmet hay, potato salad and a side of tuna. I could tell the hay was a grade above what I had eaten in the past. The flavor was richer, but that didn’t necessarily make it better. As for my first experience eating meat in Equestria, I was disappointed. It wasn’t bad, but there was a subtle twang and an aftertaste that hadn’t been there when I was human, as if to remind me nothing was the same anymore. At some point, Zephyr Zap had ditched me to be closer to Annuity. I didn’t know if this was because it was her party, or if Zap, being the social butterfly she was, got bored with just me. From there, we sang happy birthday to Annuity again, who had to climb a ladder to blow out the candles on a multilayer cake. As I accepted a slice, I rolled my eyes and chastised myself for naively believing I could cheat on my daily sugar intake. Then came the moment everyone—but mostly Annuity—was waiting for: the presents. At some point, the party staff had gathered all the gifts into a massive pile that stood as an altar to Annuity’s excess. To avoid having to use an even bigger ladder, Annuity pulled the presents from the bottom of the pile. This was made possible by a small staff of unicorns that would catch any tumbling presents with their magic. It was a shame really, as being entombed by an avalanche of presents would have been a rather fitting way for Annuity to go. Honestly, Annuity was so rich I didn’t see the point in getting her anything, but I guess birthday presents were simply that special to most foals. The contents fell into every conceivable category. She got special edition books signed by the author, handmade pottery and other crafts, and even a poodle puppy. The latter was from Granite, but I was certain that there must have been an arrangement ahead of time. Then Annuity came to my present. I was caught somewhat off-guard because I had forgotten what the wrapping paper even looked like. “What the heck is this?” Annuity blurted out, turning over the stuffed animal in her hooves. Inspired by my recent dream, I had commissioned a stuffed troll in Annuity’s colors. I had instructed the seamstress to make it look as much like her as possible. It even had her cutie mark. The cherry on top was the doll’s expression. Despite the fangs, it still conveyed a certain pompous quality. The crowd had a mixed reaction: some were confused, others thought it was cute, and others still thought it was hideous. Annuity meanwhile rolled her eyes and tossed it on the steadily growing opened pile. It took a full hour for Annuity to get through the massive tribute she had exacted for herself. After my own gift, I didn’t have much reason to watch. I tried to track down the rest of the AAA but despite the thinning crowd, there were just too many ponies, so I had to settle for hanging around with Monocle and Pink Diamond instead. About an hour later, the party had died down. All the vendors had left, Annuity’s adult friends had departed to get ready for work, and most of the remainder were ponies from school. At this point Graceful Charity stepped onto the stage that had featured live musicians earlier at dinner. “Everypony, I have an announcement to make. First of all, thank you all for coming to Annuity’s birthday party today. I hope you all had a good time.” This was met by cheers. “But really, why stop here? We have enough sleeping bags, so you’re all welcome to stay and make it a sleepover party!” The crowd cheered again. Now where have I seen that twist before? At this point Annuity trotted on the stage, brimming with confidence. “I suppose we do need to ask the birthday girl herself first. What do you say, Annuity?” “But wouldn’t that be a problem?” Annuity asked, wearing a predatory grin. The crowd murmured. “Why’s that, honey?” Graceful asked, springing the trap. “You know, I’d be worried about Pink Diamond getting scared. After all, she didn’t know to bring her Tadfoals night light.” ” “Tadfoals?” “You mean those books for babies?” “And she’s old enough to go to Annuity’s school?” The rest was drowned out by laughter. I looked to my left, and tears were welling in Pink’s eyes. “Oops. Sorry,” Annuity offered, making no effort to come off as convincing. “You—you…” Pink Diamond sobbed. “You said you wouldn’t tell anypony!” More laughter surrounded us. I got the sense that quite a few ponies were just going with the herd, but Pink Diamond’s distress didn’t discriminate. She looked to the side, found an opening and ran away bawling. So she still uses a night light. Annuity must have learned that in Open Hearts. It shouldn’t be that big a deal. I looked to the side to see Pink Diamond’s tail disappear behind a bush. Wait a minute. Wasn’t it my job to prevent this from happening? My expression soured. I failed Celestia. I took on a commitment I couldn’t keep. It may have blindsided me, but I still failed… “Ponyfeathers,” I hissed, galloping after her.