//------------------------------// // Chapter 3: Market Day // Story: The Uncle // by Alaborn //------------------------------// The Uncle By Alaborn Standard disclaimer: This is a not for profit fan work. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is copyright Hasbro, Inc. I make no claim to any copyrighted material mentioned herein. Chapter 3: Market Day Back in the kitchen, May Flowers was finishing her breakfast, with Stonehoof on her lap, while Darlene was tackling the dishes. She stood on her hind hooves, leaning against the sink, as she worked. The sink was the one part of the kitchen that most resembled its human counterpart, with a faucet and a single flat handle controlling the water flow and temperature. “Need any help?” Evan asked. “I’m good here,” Darlene said, holding up a forehoof. The sponge Darlene was using was different, shaped something like a large doughnut that wrapped around her hoof. “Do you think you can dry the plates?” “I hope so,” Evan said. He imitated his girlfriend’s posture and leaned against the counter, and then took a towel in one hoof. He certainly didn’t trust one hoof to hold a plate, so he dried the plate, one side at a time, while it sat on the counter. Evan heard hooves on the floor, and turned around to watch May Flowers come to the sink, her plate balanced on her back. “I’d better give this to you before Stonehoof gets his hooves in the syrup,” she said. She then transferred the plate to the sink using her mouth. “Thanks,” Darlene said. She carefully picked up the plate, sandwiching it between two hooves, and moved it under the running water. “It was nice to meet you two. I just wish it was under better circumstances,” May Flowers said. “Likewise,” Evan said. May Flowers walked away, stopping at the door to the kitchen to wave to the foals. “Bye, Stonehoof! Bye, Rose Aurora!” “Bye bye!” Stonehoof replied, waving back. Once May Flowers left, Evan spoke to Darlene. “April Showers volunteered to show us around town, help us get acclimated, and also help you learn to fly.” “I’m not sure it’s a good idea,” she replied. “I want you to fly. It’s the best thing about being a pegasus, and you shouldn’t leave Equestria without experiencing it.” “I don’t disagree. It’s just that, you know, April Showers acts awfully familiar for a mare you just met at the wedding.” She paused; Evan remained silent. “But maybe that’s just how ponies are.” “Huh? Oh, yeah. That’s how ponies are.” Darlene looked at Evan. “Oh my God. You two were a thing!” she exclaimed. “We were a one-time thing,” Evan said. “And she promised to keep her wings to herself. Look, we need the help. I’ll ask her to leave if she does something wrong. Okay?” “Okay,” Darlene finally said. Evan headed outside. “We’d like to accept your offer to help us out,” he told April Showers. She responded by jumping into the air and flying a loop. “Remember what you promised,” Evan said. “Right. I’m just helping you learn how to live in Ponyville.” “Let’s get Darlene and the kids.” Darlene had finished washing the dishes. April Showers stepped in to finish drying them. She held both the towel and the plates with her wings. “How do you do that? With your wings?” Darlene asked. “Once you master flying, you can feel how each feather is tied to your muscles. It’s then possible to manipulate them individually, working wings in a method similar to your human hands. That’s probably beyond my ability to teach, and I’m afraid I don’t know batponies well enough to say if they can do anything similar.” “But you know how I can fly?” Darlene said. “Yes. I help both pegasus and batpony foals fly, and at least through intermediate flight lessons, everything works the same.” “So where do we start?” “I’d recommend going to the park to practice. It will allow Rose Aurora to get some fresh air and Stonehoof to play with other foals.” “We also need to go shopping. We used the last of the milk making waffles, and we need some kind of brush for our wings.” “A preening comb,” April Showers said. “And I think yours is called a felt brush,” she said to Darlene. “I’ll know it when I see it.” “How are we going to transport the kids?” Darlene asked. “Rose has a stroller. It’s probably in the closet by the front door.” Sure enough, a stroller, with seats for two foals, was in the closet. Evan pulled it out. It looked just like a human baby stroller. Which led to one obvious question. “How do you push it?” April Showers walked up to the stroller. The handle was low enough to fit under her chin, and she pushed it with her chest, or whatever the ponies called that part of their body. Now it made sense why the handle had its concave shape. It took several attempts for Evan and Darlene to get everything ready to leave the house with two foals. For Rose Aurora, they collected her pacifier, her diaper bag, and the two-thirds of a bottle left over from her last feedings. They picked up toys for Stonehoof, a toy cart and a plush doll that vaguely resembled a teddy bear. Finally, they remembered they needed the bits that Jason and Rose stored in the cupboard. “How do parents do this every day?” Darlene wondered. “And Jason wants even more kids,” Evan noted. “Let’s go,” April Showers said. “Darlene, we can have you practice moving your wings while you walk.” Darlene again shrugged, but didn’t open her wings. “I can’t get them to work.” “Pegasus foals learn when their parents take care of their wings. For you, I will have to manually manipulate your wings so that you know the basic movements.” “I can do that,” Evan volunteered. “Twilight Sparkle showed me how to use my wings the first time I came here.” They stepped outside; Darlene put on her sunglasses. Evan started with the basic positions for climbing, descending, and turning. Darlene closed her eyes, concentrating on the muscles moving in her body. “This feels weird,” she said, flapping her wings on her own. “There’s a lot more to learn to add precision to your movement, plus stunt flying and the emergency maneuvers that go with them. But we can get you so that you can fly from Point A to Point B safely. Just don’t go above cloud level.” “Cloud level?” Darlene said. “Cloud level isn’t that far up here,” Evan said. Darlene flapped her wings again. “So why aren’t I flying?” she asked. “Right now, you just want to move your wings. To fly, you have to want to fly. Flying uses magic, and magic uses will.” “I think I’ll wait until the park.” “While we’re walking, can you explain to us how to use the stove?” Evan said. As they walked to town, April Showers patiently described all of the modern conveniences, asking how each of them compared to their human examples. She explained how to use the stove, how to control the heat in the wood-fired oven, and how the ice deliverypony kept everypony’s food cold during the hot summer. She then talked about the one other appliance Evan and Darlene would have to use. The washing machine she described sounded the hand-spun machines of decades past, although the mechanism used to spin the clothes wasn’t the same at all.” “You run on a treadmill to wash your clothes?” Darlene said incredulously. “It’s really the most sensible approach for ponies,” April Showers replied. “The best part of it is that you only need one treadmill, and it can operate many different machines.” “Like what?” Evan asked. “Nowadays, most ponies only use it for their washing machine, but my mother said her treadmill chores included pressing juice, grinding flour, and even making ice cream. She had to do it, because Ponyville was even smaller then.” “And you buy all of these things now?” Darlene asked. “Yes. Ponyville has a real marketplace now. We’ll go there after the park. But first, we’re going there.” April Showers pointed with a wing to a large, blocky building in the distance. It didn’t possess the quaint architecture common to Ponyville. “That’s Barnyard Bargains?” Evan said, his eyes picking up the sign on the building. He had heard the name on Earth, and knew it was the closest thing the ponies had to a Wal-Mart or other big box retailer. “The original store,” April Showers said. “Well, not really original; the building’s been torn down and replaced by something larger many different times. “Why are we going there?” Darlene asked. “In my experience, it’s the best place to get items like brushes and combs. Since they get replaced a lot, I’d rather get the consistency of something made in a factory in Baltimare than use a hoofcrafted one.” They soon arrived at Barnyard Bargains. Up close, Evan and Darlene saw it was nowhere near the size of the stores they knew, and of course there was no giant parking lot filled with cars. The store was busy, with pony shoppers coming and going. Many resembled them, families with small foals. Inside, the first thing Evan noticed was a series of portraits, each of a distinguished earth pony stallion, with each pony having a cutie mark related to money. There were also framed black-and-white photographs, looking like depictions of previous incarnations of Barnyard Bargains. Other than that, the store was familiar, with aisles of shelves stacked with goods. They passed by a prominent display, and April Showers paused. “You should get these,” she said. “Cloudsdale Cloud Clusters?” Evan read off the sign. “What is it?” “It’s a candy made with clouds. If you’re not in Cloudsdale, Barnyard Bargains is the only place to get them.” “I’d ask how a candy is made with clouds, but I’m sure the answer is ‘magic’,” Darlene said. April Showers nodded. She directed them to the aisle with personal grooming supplies. With multiple kinds of ponies, there were multiple products. Evan spotted hoof polish, horn gloss, preening oil, and shampoos for manes, coats, and wings. He picked up the shampoo made for wings, and then spotted the kind of comb he had used on his previous trip. “And here’s the one for Darlene,” April Showers said, holding up a brush in her mouth. It looked a little like a foam brush used for painting. They then proceeded to the checkout, where a young pony tallied up their bill using an old-fashioned mechanical cash register. Other than the giant buttons sized for hooves, it again resembled something out of an old cartoon. “And here you go,” the cashier said, speaking clearly despite holding in her mouth the paper bag containing their purchases. Evan took the bag, placing it in a compartment in the back of the stroller. “Thank you for shopping at Barnyard Bargains!” she said with a forced smile. Now that was something Evan recognized. Evan blinked after leaving the store; the sun seemed unnaturally bright after spending so long indoors. “Where are we going now?” “This way,” April Showers said, pointing with her wing. At this time of day, the town was up and about. Ponies walked, flew, and pulled carts, but few appeared to be in any hurry. They would frequently stop to chat with each other. There was a feeling of community in this small town that Evan didn’t know back home. After traveling several blocks through the center of town, passing an eclectic assortment of buildings housing businesses and homes, the road became less busy. Now, only residences lined the street. Past there, the road ended, though a dirt trail, well worn by the pounding of countless hooves, persisted into the grassy field beyond. The park the group now found itself in was mostly an open field. There was a wooden jungle gym over to one side, with benches surrounding it. The ponies in the park were mostly like them, families with toddlers and infants in strollers. “Um, is this the park where the attack happened?” Darlene asked. April Showers nodded. “It is. But don’t worry. There are ponies watching the Everfree Forest right now.” “No one seems bothered by it,” Evan noted. “Ponyville sees worse all the time,” April Showers said. “I’d rather not think about that,” Evan said. He turned to his nephew. “What do you want to do, Stonehoof?” “Climb!” the colt said. Evan stuck his muzzle into the stroller, and undid the straps holding in Stonehoof. As soon as he was freed, the colt climbed out of the stroller and ran towards the jungle gym. “I’ll keep an eye on the kids, and let you practice flying,” Evan said to Darlene. “Okay,” she replied. Rose Aurora was easy to watch; the filly was mostly asleep. Evan just had to make sure she was shaded from the sun. And Stonehoof didn’t need watching at all. The jungle gym had all sorts of steps, ramps, slides, ropes, nets, and ladders, and many times, Evan was worried he’d have to fly in and stop Stonehoof from falling. But despite lacking hands, the colt navigated each of the obstacles with ease, and so did all the colts and fillies playing with him. Stonehoof was just over two years old, and the other foals looked to be around the same age. All of them were similarly capable, showing the coordination of a human child of five or six years. He then checked on Darlene. She was flying, by the loosest definition of the word. She was in the air and not touching the ground, though she came close several times as April Showers tried to teach her how to make a controlled descent. The native pegasus worked with her patiently, and was nimble enough to stabilize Darlene when she needed the help, and fast enough to catch her sunglasses when they fell off her muzzle. Taking a seat on a bench, Evan turned to watching ponies. There were several adult ponies, mostly mares but also a few stallions, doing the same thing as him, keeping watch on their foals. He tried to match the foals with their parents, but got it wrong more often than not. Coloration was an imperfect predictor, and even kind of foal didn’t work. He saw earth ponies, pegasi, and unicorns go off with parents of a different tribe. Evan wondered how rare batponies were, given he didn’t see any in the part other than Darlene. He also wondered how often one would see one of the other sapient races that lived in this world. Staying seated on the hard wooden bench was beginning to get to Evan. He got up, looking for somewhere else to sit, but then he noticed the clouds drifting above the park. He remembered sitting on a cloud on his previous trip to Equestria, and how comfortable it was. Could he grab one? After confirming that Rose Aurora was still asleep, Evan spread his wings and jumped. With powerful strokes, he pushed through the air, gaining altitude rapidly as he ascended in a tight spiral. Before long, he was level with the low-hanging clouds. Evan circled a cloud, one big enough to seat several pegasi. It looked for all the world like a giant ball of cotton, not a phenomenon of weather. He put his hooves on the cloud, only to have them push through it. He stared at the cloud. Evan recalled April Showers talking about the importance of will to magic, and moving a cloud certainly counted as magic. He concentrated, picturing himself grabbing hold of the cloud, and tried again. This time, he felt an electric tingle as his hooves touched something pliant but solid. Evan angled his wings and descended, willing the cloud to move and maintain its shape. The tingling sensation continued, and increased as he approached the ground. But before he got there, he felt a shock, like a nasty static shock, but through his entire body. April Showers flew up to him. “You should see your mane right now!” she said, laughing. “What happened?” he asked. “You moved a cloud without discharging the magic through your wings.” “Why didn’t you warn me?” “There’s not enough lightning in that cloud to do anything more than make your mane all frizzy.” She pulled out a small mirror and showed him the results. Evan immediately recalled touching a Van de Graaff generator in school, and what that did to his hair. He shook his head, hoping that would fix his mane. “Here,” April Showers said, and helped push the cloud into position, just above the ground. Once there, Evan took a seat. It was a very comfortable seat. Darlene flew up to them. Her flying had improved considerably, Evan noticed. She then did the same thing Evan did, and poked the cloud. “Does that work for me?” she asked. April Showers nodded. “Land on the cloud and it will support you, unless you will it otherwise.” Darlene planted her hooves on the cloud and bounced a couple of times. “Weird.” She then settled in, imitating the way Evan was sitting, like a dog. Evan wrapped a wing around Darlene and pulled her close. She leaned her head against his. Together, they took in the clean air, the colorful ponies, and everything else his brother enjoyed every day. “This is really incredible,” Darlene said. “Yeah. And so peaceful.” They were interrupted by Rose Aurora crying. “Well, it was good while it lasted,” Evan said. Evan jumped and glided to the ground. A quick sniff indicated that the filly didn’t need a diaper change, and so she was likely hungry. She took the offered bottle and started feeding. Five minutes later, Evan noticed a smell. Sighing, he prepared to change her diaper. He soon realized he’d have to wait, as Rose Aurora had clutched all four legs around the bottle and she wasn’t letting go. Evan heard soft hooffalls as Darlene landed beside him. “Something wrong?” “Rose Aurora needs a change, but she’s not ready to stop feeding.” “Can you wait?” “Sure, but I’d rather not.” Darlene’s muzzle wrinkled as she caught the foul scent. April Showers joined them. “Anything wrong?” “We’re waiting to change her diaper,” Evan said. “Wait. What are we supposed to do with dirty diapers?” April Showers poked her muzzle into the stroller. “Store it in this,” she said, holding something in her mouth. The item turned out to be a thick rubber bag with an adhesive seal on top. Once Rose Aurora finished feeding, they changed her. Darlene held the filly while Evan handled the diaper. He was amazed at how natural it was starting to feel to be using his mouth to do such a messy task. Once the scent of dirty diaper and baby powder cleared from his nose, Evan picked up an aroma that smelled good. “Is someone grilling?” he asked. “There’s normally ponies coming to sell food around lunch time,” April Showers said. A quick search found the grill pony, an earth pony cooking skewers of vegetables. He had no problem simultaneously managing the grill, building new skewers, and selling the final result, a quite impressive feat using only his hooves and mouth. “How much?” Evan asked. “One bit per skewer,” he replied. “Do you want one?” he asked Darlene and April Showers. Both mares nodded. “Let’s start with three,” he said. Evan paid the stallion, and then three skewers of vegetables were placed on a wire tray, which was then rotated so that they could grab them by the handle. The skewers were made of wood, with a large flat handle. He glanced over at April Showers to confirm how they were supposed to be held. The handle fit snugly in her pastern. Evan followed, and quickly ate a chunk of zucchini. It tasted far better than any zucchini he’d ever eaten before. He wasn’t sure if it was because of his pony taste buds, or because of the quality of the cook. Probably both. Evan finished his skewer, and contemplated getting another. But he didn’t think he could eat a whole one. “Think Stonehoof would eat this?” Evan asked the others. “I know kids are supposed to hate vegetables, but I don’t know if that applies to ponies,” Darlene said. “I’ve never heard of a foal hating vegetables,” April Showers said. “Now, hay, on the other hoof....” “Yuck,” Darlene said. “One more,” Evan said to the cook. Evan ate half of the second skewer, and took the rest to Stonehoof. “Are you hungry?” he asked him. “Yeah!” He sat down, closed his eyes, and opened his mouth wide. “Ahhhh....” Evan wondered if that was normal. Stonehoof was of the age where his parents might feed him at the dinner table, were he human, but as a pony he seemed a lot more advanced, and seemed to be okay eating pancakes, mess aside. But the little colt was adorable, and Evan couldn’t say no to him. He pushed a bit of squash to the end of the skewer and put it in his mouth. Stonehoof bit down on the vegetable. “Mmmm,” he said as he chewed noisily. The colt made short work of the rest of the food. Evan thought he might have to buy another. Then his ears picked up music, a simple tune played on tinny bells. It almost sounded like.... “ICE CREAM!” Stonehoof shouted. He jumped to his hooves and galloped in the direction of the music, with the energy that only a toddler could muster. Evan glanced back. He saw Darlene grabbing the stroller, so he flew off after Stonehoof, to make sure he didn’t get in trouble. But the closest thing to trouble was the mob of foals surrounding the ice cream pony. She was a unicorn mare with a cutie mark of an ice cream sundae, wearing a harness and pulling a cart. She used her magic to detach herself from the cart, and with a bit more magic, an awning unfurled from it. “One at a time,” she announced. And amazingly, the foals got into an orderly line. “That has to be the magic of harmony at work,” Evan quipped. After two minutes, Evan and Stonehoof were at the front of the line. “Chocolate!” the colt said. “What flavors do you have?” Evan asked. “The normal. Vanilla, chocolate, apple, carrot, rose, and dandelion.” the mare replied. Evan was certainly not feeling that adventurous. “I’ll have a vanilla. Darlene? April Showers?” “Chocolate,” Darlene said. “Rose for me,” April Showers said. “That will be four bits.” Evan paid the mare, and took each pony’s ice cream order in turn, each placed in a shallow paper bowl. He looked around. “Do you have spoons?” The ice cream mare looked at him curiously. “What do you need spoons for? It’s ice cream!” April Showers said. She had her muzzle in the dish, which was balanced on her hoof. Looking over, he saw Stonehoof did the same. Evan shrugged. “I guess we just treat it like an ice cream cone,” he said to Darlene. “What’s an ice cream cone?” April Showers asked. “It’s, like, a thin crisp waffle, rolled into a cone, and then you put the ice cream on top of it.” “That’s a great idea! You humans have the greatest inventions!” “Well, it is one of my favorites,” Evan said. They sat and enjoyed the ice cream. Evan found the pony way of eating ice cream was like licking an ice cream cone, just without the cone. It was the best ice cream he’d ever tasted. And judging by Darlene’s reaction, she agreed. When they were done, Stonehoof tried to get his sister to have the ice cream left in his bowl. But she was asleep, and probably wouldn’t have known what to do if she were awake. “Come on, Stonehoof. We need to go to the market now, and then home for your nap. “No!” Stonehoof said. He planted his hooves on the ground. Evan sighed. He mentally prepared for the possibility that Stonehoof was doing what he did back at the hospital, but this time he didn’t have only problem picking up the colt and placing him on his back. As April Showers led them to the market, Evan realized that Stonehoof had just tricked him into carrying him. “This looks like the farmers’ market back home,” Darlene said. Evan had to agree with her. The neat rows of wagons, the diversity of fresh produce and small craft items, and pleasant atmosphere reminded him of the farmers’ market that ran during the weekends in summer. The ponies selling the produce, many still wearing yokes or harnesses, was one difference, of course, as well as the wooden wagons being the real deal, rather than facsimiles attached to metal trailers. “Everything smells so good,” Evan said. “There’s no place like the market in an earth pony town to get fresh produce,” April Showers said. “We should get some food for dinner,” Evan said. “Like what?” Darlene said. “Uh....” “Pizza!” Stonehoof shouted. “That doesn’t sound too hard to make,” Darlene said. “What the heck do ponies put on pizza? I’m pretty sure it’s not pepperoni and sausage.” “Peppers, onions, and flowers, mostly,” April Showers offered. “Only weird ponies put mushrooms on pizza.” “Only weird humans put mushrooms on pizza,” Evan concurred. “I don’t really want to eat flowers,” Darlene said. “We’ll stick to vegetables, then.” Evan looked around, seeing plenty of choices. “Oh, where can we find the milk?” “Oh, I’m sure you’ll figure it out,” April Showers said with a smile. Browsing the market, Evan and Darlene found so many tasty foods. They started with the tomatoes, onions, and peppers, found the pony selling cheese, and then picked up some fresh herbs from an earth pony selling dozens of herbs. That wagon had a particularly pleasant aroma. They had enough money, so Evan picked up some flowers. Thinking back to his previous trip, he ate mostly human food, and was curious how foods like flowers tasted to ponies. “We still haven’t seen the milk,” Darlene said. Evan looked down the aisle, and then saw one wagon at the end of it. “Oh, you have got to be kidding me!” Darlene looked and saw it too. The pony selling milk wasn’t a pony at all, but a cow. It was one thing to read that cows, like a remarkably large number of animals, could talk and think in Equestria. It was another thing entirely to think of them selling milk. Best not to think about whose milk it was, either. “Hello! How are mooooo doing?” the cow said as they approached. She had an accent like someone from northern Minnesota or Wisconsin. “We’re out of milk, and we have a hungry filly,” Evan said. “Aww, such a cutie, don’t you know? How many bottles?” She waved a hoof over a metal container in the wagon, something very similar to what the ice cream mare had. “Knowing how much foals drink, we better get two,” he replied. The cow nodded and pulled out two glass bottles, like something a 1950’s milkman would deliver. Without thinking about it, Evan picked up one of the bottles in his hoof; fortunately, it curled around it to give him a strong grip. “That will be four bits, dearie,” the cow said. Evan paid, and he put away the bottle he was holding. Darlene picked up the other bottle and looked at it. “Is that cream?” she said, looking at the liquid on top. “Never bought milk before?” April Showers said. “Not straight from the cow. And not like this,” Evan said. “The milk where we come from doesn’t separate.” “What kind of magic do you use?” April Showers asked. “Not magic. It’s... what’s the word?” “Homogenized,” Darlene said. “That. Don’t ask me how it works, though.” He looked at the bottle. “Is this pasteurized?” “Is that a human term?” April Showers asked. “Yes. It’s something that kills the germs in milk. Heat treatment, maybe?” “No need for that. We have spells,” April Showers said. “You have spells for everything, don’t you?” Darlene said. “Yes, and if we don’t, we can ask somepony like Twilight Sparkle to make one.” Evan and Darlene parted ways with April Showers just outside the marketplace. Evan invited her to come back for dinner, but she declined. After seeing Darlene’s reaction to the offer, he was glad April Showers had said no. She likely had picked up on Darlene’s attitude. They strapped Stonehoof into the stroller with his sister and headed back. Walking back to Jason’s home during the daytime was an entirely different experience. The town was active, with ponies out and about. The townsponies waved to their little family as they walked by. As they neared the house, neighbors called out to the foals by name, and inquired about how Rose was doing. “These ponies are really friendly,” Darlene commented. “Too friendly. I’m not sure if I could get used to this,” Evan said. “Some days I just want to go home and watch television.” “We should take the kids to visit Jason and Rose,” Darlene said. “Good idea. Maybe after dinner?” “Right,” Darlene said. “But right now these two need their nap.” Stonehoof replied with every two year old’s favorite word. “No.” “Too bad, kid,” Evan said, pushing the stroller into the house. “You’re going to nap, whether you want to or not.”