The Conversion Bureau: Green Tea

by Da Bunnana King

Green Tea

Green Tea
===
I woke up like any other day - Groggy and wanting to snuggle underneath my bed sheets and sleep the rest of the day, but I couldn’t for school was on today. The alarm continued to blare in my face until I slammed my fist down, silencing it for good.

“Jacob, honey! It’s time to go to school!” my mother yelled as I rolled out of bed and searched my room for a clean school uniform to wear.

“Yeah mum! I’m up, but could you make me some breakfast?” I yelled back as I struggled with my pant legs.

“Do you want oatmeal or raisin toast?” she said as she trotted in while I buttoned up my white senior’s shirt. She had a bouncy pink mane and a light rose coat with the cutie mark of a mixing bowl and a whisker. Most people would have mistaken her for a true Equestrian but I still saw she had the same hazel eyes that showed a bit of her former human self.

“Can I have both?” I asked as my stomach growled loudly,

“Sure thing sweetie, just get your bag packed and I’ll walk you to school.” she said as she trotted off to make me my delicious breakfast.

I looked at myself in the mirror, to see my dark black hair and hazel eyes. I still had a white complexion even though most kids were slightly tan... that is if there were any other children my age, all of my friends got converted in the early years so it was really just me that was left human.

You see a couple of years ago these ponies emerged from this bubble in the middle of the sea and they spread good cheer to all. They helped us by giving us food, rebuilding our shelters and clearing up most of our skies, and helped the homeless.

A year after Equestria had emerged two major things happened, the first one was that you could choose to ponify and live in Equestria and the second (and probably most important one) was that the ozone disappeared over Australia and some of New Zealand and Tasmania. It was strange because scientists found out that the smog and pollution were creating an ozone layer for us.

Most of my friends had decided to turn into ponies, including one who turned into a griffon. Even my parents had become ponies, my mother turned out as an Earth pony and my father a pegasus. Neither of them used their old human names anymore since something ‘clicked’ in their heads saying, ‘Ponies don’t need to be called Kevin or Maria, they should be Lightning Hoof and Cotton Candy.’

“Sweety, your breakfast is ready!” my mother called out from the kitchen,

“Alright, I’m coming!” I yelled back as I adjusted my blue and yellow tie that matched my dark blue pants and socks. The school insisted on keeping the senior uniform a bleached white instead of a more spirited light blue, so I guess that’s why Silver Quill is captain of the debating team and has a Cutie mark in debating.

“Jacob, sweety your food’s getting cold!” Mum yelled for the last time before I was on that table scoffing down the oatmeal and the toast as quickly as I could.

“Thanks mum seeya!” I said as I rushed out the door, not wanting to be walked to school by my mum.
===
I walked to the train station underneath the cover of several buildings whose shadow I used for cover while most ponies could walk out in broad daylight, due to their coats of fur and some form of magic that they had. So every human you would see hung to the shadows like a ghost afraid of the light, I hated it and it was one of the main reasons my friends wanted me to be a magical creature. I never gave it good thought as I liked my thumbs and hunger for most meat products, even if they were synthetic.

Most of my little group that I hung out with were mostly ponies but one somehow turned
out as a griffin with red markings instead of gold, green or purple around their eyes. He would have usually tackled me down by now on the way to school, just to show how he can spot anyone from four miles away.

I heard the quiet noise of wings swishing through the air above me, and I could almost feel the wind blowing in my face. I looked up expecting to see some derped face pegasus floating above me, but instead I looked up to see an inverted Razor Wing staring at me with his eagle eyes.

“Sup Chicken,” I said patting him on his head like a pet dog, “Did someone let you out of the coop again?”

“Very funny, Jacob.” he said swatting my hand away from his head, “Now come on, we’re going to be late for school.” he said as he landed next to me.

“Oh no, we wouldn’t want to miss a second of school, otherwise the world will end.” I said sarcastically waving my arms around in the air like a lunatic.

“It’s not the end of the world... yet. You know that-” he said before I wrapped my hand around his beak.

“I don’t want to hear it, alright. I’ll ponify myself after this year.” I said as I tightened my grip before releasing it from my vice like grip.

“Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the rock.” he said, rubbing his beak,

“Wait, weren’t you supposed to say somepony or something?” I asked as the large school grounds began to emerge from the horizon. You could see all sorts of pegasus and a few griffins fly into the school, I envied them of their power of flight.

“No because I am not a pony.” he said as he noticed me staring at the heavens again, “Look, if you want to fly then why not get converted?”

“What did I just say?”

“Oh you know the regular, ‘Oh dear god, please help me. My face is on fire.” he said sarcastically rolling his eyes.

“Very funny bird brain.” I said as we walked through the main gates of the old school.

“Oh wow that hurts. I feel hurt, you know that?” he said pulling the big puppy dog eyes as I made my way to my locker.

“Wow, you’re more difficult to get rid of then the Red Plague.” I jokingly said,

“That’s a bit too soon.” one of my fellow human classmates said,

“Oh it was a joke man.” I said shrugging as he closed his grey locker and bumped into my shoulder with force.

“Man Jacob, you are really insensitive sometimes.” he said as he put his books down. They were written in Equestrian and whatever the Griffonic language was - to me, they just looked like random symbols and claw marks (or literal chicken scratches); but to them, they were probably books about history, or tales of a great warrior.

“Come on Jacob, we got maths to go too.” he said as me pushed me with his head.

“Oh god, not Mr. Phillips, I swear that guy’s crazy”

“Well it doesn’t matter, let's go.” he said, as his beak began to stick into my back.

“Ow, you're hurting my back man.” I said, as I felt a sharp pain in my back when he pulled out.

“Sorry, forget I have this thing sometimes.” he said, as he removed something from the inside of his mouth.

“Well be careful man.” I said as I rubbed my sore back as we walked into the classroom as it was beginning.
===
The day went on with the slow mind numbing pace that I experienced each and every day from this school. It wasn’t so bad, I had my friends who were always doing something crazy at lunch.

And I stared at the clock waiting for the lunch bell to ring, waiting for the sweet noise to grace my ears telling me it was time for food. I was already thinking about the mouth watering food that was being prepared in the school’s cafeteria, and it made me salivate like a faucet turned all the way on.

‘Come on Jacob, get a hold of yourself,’ I mentally kicked myself back to learning algebra.

“So for homework tonight you have to finish chapter two of your maths text book... and now you can go to lunch.” the teacher said as the whole classroom bolted to the door and towards the cafeteria.

‘Must. Go. FASTER!’ I thought as I was in a mad dash against everyone to secure the best food before someone else got to it.

We all packed into the small room of the cafeteria as I fought against the current of ponies to get to the hamburgers which had several griffins and one diamond dog fighting over the small stack of boxes containing the sweet, delicious, juicy hamburger patty in between the crisp lettuce leaves and inside of the whole grain buns.

I grabbed a box and made a dash for the exit with my credit chip in hand as I made my hasty exit to enjoy my food.

I made my way to a table at the far end of the courtyard that you needed to pass through in order to get anywhere in the school. Luckily the school was rich enough to have a device that covered the school in a semi-transparent bubble that created a sort of ozone layer, so it was a constant temperature and you never had to hide from the sun if you were a human. Most Equestrian creatures shrugged it off and never were affected by its harmful rays.

"Jacob, over here silly filly!" yelled a turquoise mare with a cherry red mane that was put up in an 80's fashion.

"I'm not a filly nor am I a pony." I replied back as Razor landed next to me swallowing a whole fish, bone and all.

"Well then what are you?" she asked.

"A dude who didn't drink a cherry potion." I smugly replied to her before being backhanded by Razor. You see, back before she was a mare. She used to be a he, mainly the full back for the 15A rugby. Most of us were surprised to see a mare trotting up to us calling herself Andrew, but she explained to us that it was him still inside... somewhere inside that equine body a bit of Andrew existed and not Ice Drops.

"Apologize now," Razor barked.

"Sorry 'bout that Ice." I said rubbing the back of my head as I swear I felt a clump of hair missing from the back of my skull.

“It’s alright, but anyhow me and the rest of the gang want to talk to you about something.” Ice said cheerfully as we walk towards my two remaining friends, but my blood ran ice cold. Whenever a woman or mare in this case ever said the words ‘want to talk to you about something,’ usually means bad news or you’re in deep shit.

I gulped uneasily as we approached the remainder of my friends, Silver Quill who was an Earth pony but the first one in our group to earn a cutie mark out of all the other ponies, and Iron Hammer who was an Earth pony and the second one to earn his cutie mark in metal work.

Iron Hammer was a large pony with a grey coat and dark ebony mane that complemented his cutie mark of a hammer hitting an anvil. His eyes were a dark grey color, to say the least he was quite monotone which expressed his personality as well. He was always straightforward and was always the guy you could rely on when you were in strife, he never talked much but when he did he usually lit up the room with funny stories or a hilarious joke.

Meanwhile Silver Quill was as his name implied a silver pony. Yep he was all silver, mane and coat while his eyes were a deep blue. He was like the polar opposite of Iron. He talked and talked more often than a robbery not happening in Australia, which was impossible as Australia had a extremely high crime rate compared to most Western societies. All the talking earned him the cutie mark in debating which looked like three cartoon speech bubbles going back and forth.

They sat on the thick grass underneath the old gumtree that was rumored to be there before the school was even made. We plopped on down next to them as they looked up from their salads to see me standing there with a meaty burger. I heard that the smell of cooked meat could make most newfoals vomit from the vile smell, but I found the aroma of it quite intoxicating.

“Sup ladies,” I said as I opened up the wrapper and began to feast on the burger, “What’s new with you guys?”

“Well me and the rest of us were thinking yesterday to take you out to a new Equestria restaurant that opened up in Brisbane’s riverbank,” Silver said as he wiped his mouth from some greens that stuck to his muzzle.

“Alright, but why?” I asked as I had devoured half the burger.

“Well you seem to be fascinated with food and you seemed down in the dumps lately.”

“Well that is true about food, but I haven’t been acting more mopey than usually. In fact I think I’ve been more happy than usual,” I said as I finished the burger.

“Well you have seemed less happy than usual, so we wanted to cheer you up. That and when was the last time we did something together as a group?”

“Well I heard the incentive of food so I’m game.” I said as I wiped my mouth with the shirt sleeve of my blazer.

“Alright, well meet us at Central station and we’ll walk there together... just bring something nice to wear.”

“Why? Is it some form of fancy restaurant where they only serve tiny portions and charge a hundred dollars for it?” I asked in fear of having to wear a tie to a restaurant that would send most people broke before the main course has arrived.

“No silly, it’s just that not a lot of humans get to experience Equestrian food everyday. That and it is a special occasion,” said Ice giggling like a little girl.

“Well, alright I’ll try and wear something nice.” I said as I began to lie down on the grass staring up at the sky. I could see some pegasi up in the clouds playing their version of football, hoofball I think was its name.

They froliced about up in the clouds, either napping on them or making something out of clouds. They moved them and shaped them as if they were made out of clay and light as a feather, I did envy their ability of flight but I didn’t want to trade my humanity for wings. It just didn’t sit right, but I also wanted to fly. A catch twenty-two situation if you ask me.

“Hello. Earth to Jacob, are you receiving me Jacob?” Razor said sticking his head in front of my face.

I pushed his feathery head out of my face as the bell rang signaling the end of lunch. I rolled over and jumped up in a style making me look like a complete badass.

“So what time do I meet you at Central?” I asked as Razor flexed out his wings.

“Around about six, so see you there.” said Silver as we went our separate ways for class.
===
I stepped off the bus onto the main driveway for the town apartment that was converted into a small Equestrian styled village. Everyone knew each other and everyone was friendly let alone one family with one of the rudest foals I have ever met.

“Oh look Silverspoon, it’s that dirty monkey boy.” Diamond Tiara said bumping Silver Spoon with her forearm.

“Oh yeah, why don’t you get yourself converted monkey boy!” she yelled at me as I ignored them.

“Look at him, I don’t even think he knows how to speak besides grunts,” Spoon added.

“You know I can pick you both up in each of my hands and bring you to your father,” I said as I turned around.

“Ohhh, and that’s supposed to scare us?” Silver sneered as I picked them both up.

“Or I could eat you both,” I said as they screamed in terror and wriggled out of my grasp and ran back to their respective homes.

I continued my walk home in relative peace and quiet until I reached the house to see my mother waiting there with an angry expression upon it.

“Jacob, I got a call from Mr. Rich saying ‘you were scaring her daughter again,” she said in a tone that sounded like I was in a world of hurt.

“Well they started it,” I said in defence as I walked past her.

“I don’t care, you are almost eighteen and you shouldn’t be harassing little fillies,” she scolded me as I dropped my bag in my room.

“Alright mum, anyhow my friends and I are going to a restaurant in Brisbane’s riverbank,” I said as I pushed her out the door so I could change.

“Wait, there’s a restaurant in a river?” my mother asked as I changed my shirt to a nice plain blue shirt.

“No it’s on the boardwalk of the riverbank so it’s on the waterfront.” I replied as I placed on a clean pair of black skin tight jeans.

“Alright but do your homework first and then you can go but don’t be too long out there and be careful. I’ve heard that the PER still do forced ponification in that area.” she said in that worrying motherly tone of voice.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be safe.” I said as I hugged her, “Now I’ll be downstairs doing my homework and I’ll say bye to you before I leave.”

“Alright, just... Just be safe when you’re out there.” she said as I walked downstairs to begin my various papers of biology and graphics I had accumulated over the day as homework.
===
The holographic clock displayed 5:42PM as I looked up from a small sketch of a plane I had been drawing for the past hour or so. There was nothing to notable of it besides the wings had the trailing edge swept forward, reminiscent of the X-29.

“Maaa!” I yelled as I got up from my seat, “I’m heading out!”

“Alright! Just be safe and remember what I told you!” she yelled back to me as I exited the door.

I walked down the main drag of my street, and I reflected on what mum had said about the PER. Well, to begin with the Ponification of Earth’s Rebirth aren’t the most friendliest of ponies, if you’re a human that is, but I could understand why anyone would seek protection from them when the Human Liberation Force (or HLF) roamed the streets killing anything that wasn’t a human. I felt a cool breeze hit my face even though there was no wind, so I looked up to see if somepony had move a cloud or something.

“Sup Jacob.” Said Razor who was once again floating upside down.

“What are you doing here?” I asked as he picked me up in his talons and began speeding off towards the Brisbane skyline.

“I’m bringing you there directly because we made the booking wrong, so hang on!” he yelled as I held firmly to his arms, but I spread them to see what flying was like. It felt free, like the weight of the world was taken off from my shoulders as the wind blew my shirt and hair. “You really should think about becoming a griffin if you want to see more of this!”

“Yeah but I like my two legs and swag I have!” I yelled back as we flew over houses faster than any car could take me.

“But you’ll love it, the wind underneath your wings and blowing your feathers! It’s a real adrenaline rush!” he said as he ascended higher.

“Why are we going up?” I said as we dropped towards the ground at a breakneck speed. “RAZOR YOU CRAZY FEATHERBRIAN!”

“HOLD ON FOR LANDING!” he yelled as he dropped me safely in front of the small group of stunned ponies I called my friends as Razor swooped down behind me.

“Gess Jacob, it looks like you’ve seen a ghost.” Silver Quill joked as Iron Hammer just rolled his eyes and Ice Drops giggled. Everyone... well everypony was wearing some form of clothing. Ice wore a dress with small diamonds that glimmered in the light, while Silver wore a snappy Tuxedo and Iron just wore a collar with a silver tie that nearly blended into his coat.

“Right then, well what are we waiting for.” I stated as I began to walk towards the restaurant that was filled with ponies and had the aroma of a garden with various mints and spices that drifted through the air. The aroma was enough to ignore the adrenaline that coursed through my body, but it relaxed me and made me feel that this was going to be a good night.
===
We sat cramped in a booth at the rear of the establishment near the kitchen, I could hear the chefs talking to each other as they prepared meals for hungry ponies that populated the whole joint, Razor and I were the only non-pony customers in the entire place.

“We thought you might like it here, next to the kitchen that is,” Ice said as she read over the menu.

“Yeah, next to the kitchen is pretty nice, but only if I could read the menu.” I joked as everyone laughed, excluding Iron who gave one small chuckle.

“Well why don’t you get the vegi-burger, it looks like you could eat it.” said Silver as he pointed to some symbols on the page.

“Sure... why not?” I asked as a spiffy looking waiter came over in a tuxedo that fitted his equine form.

“May I take sirs’ and madam’s orders?” he said in a voice that said ‘I hate my job.’

“I’ll have the seven flowers salad please,” said Ice as she folded the menu and handed it to the waiter.

“I’ll have the hay burger with a lemon soda please,” replied Silver as he handed his menu back.

“I’ll have the berry salad,” said Razor as he placed his menu ontop of the others.

“I guess I’ll have the vegi-burger and a cola please,” I said as I handed it back to the waiter.

“I’ll have the soup of the day and a jug of green tea for all of us please,” Said Iron in his baritone voice as he handed the menu back, but the way he said it didn’t sit right with me.

“Alright then, your meals will be out shortly,” he said trotting off hastily to the kitchen.

“That was strange,” I said trying to break the awkward silence.

“Here’s your green tea everypony.” said a green mare with a teapot as a cutie mark, balancing a teapot on her head. She reached up and removed the pot from her brown mane and placed it on the table along with a cup, “Oh silly me, I forgot the other cups. I’ll be right back.” she said as she broke into a quick gallop back to the kitchen.

“Well, that was... odd,” I said as I looked at the tea which filled the small booth with an enticing aroma.

“Indeed, well Jacob why not have the first cup of tea. I hear it’s mixed with tea leaves from Equestria and some other special ingredients.” Ice said as she picked up the pot with her mouth and poured the cup full of the warm tea.

She nudged towards and into my hand that I rested on the table. It felt warm but also slightly tingly feeling, like a small electrical current was being generated by it. It steamed but also but slightly bubbles as I brought it closer to my face. I took a big whiff of it taking in its aroma of tea leaves and a hint of berry mixed in with it.

“Well let’s see if its any good,”I said, drinking the lukewarm liquid as it crawled down my throat and danced on my taste buds. It was an explosion of flavor in my mouth. I can taste the tea leaves as they flooded my mouth with flavor, but I can taste the strong flavor of grape medicine.

I began to feel light headed as the room swirled and time began to slow around me. I could see my friend’s faces begin to blur as they began to say words that my ears didn’t pick up. Then my world began to fade to black as my face began to fall towards the table, but right before I hit the table my world was completely black as I feel in an eternal abyss.
===
I floated eternally in the black void that I had been plunged into by my friends for some reason beyond my knowledge.

‘Was this the dream that newfoals talk of when they awaken after ponification?’ I questioned myself.

I slowly began to fall towards a small green dot in the distance. I picked up speed faster than an anvil being pushed off the Empire State building and the green dot grew larger in size.

I brought my arms up to my face believing that it would save me from the ground but instead I brought up two cinnamon colored trunks, the world around me began to take color. I felt a large tug on my body and mainly my back.

I lowered my arms to see a vast field of green with pegasi flying all around me, ducking and weaving around me. I felt joy and couldn’t resist playing along with them. We all flew as one and played around in the sky without a care in the world.
I flew around clouds as we spun them and shaped them into anything we wanted, they were as malleable as clay and were cold to the touch but had the same texture of cotton balls.

I lost myself in this wondrous dream as I felt welcomed into the herd. I didn’t see the blinding light that I was entering, but I was attracted to it like a moth to a light bulb as I exited the world that I didn’t want to leave, but a feeling in the back of my head said that this world did exist and I could get there now.
===
I awoke with the sound of bustle and hustle all around me but it became muted when I felt something pushing me into a quiet and cold room.

“I think he’s waking up.” came the distinct voice of Ice Drops as I was set carefully down on a cold table as scaly claws slipped from underneath my belly.

“Jacob, honey can you hear me?” asked Ice as she patted me on the back between what would now be my withers.

“Mrhphm,” I responded as my mouth was still numb from what ever they put in it.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” said Iron in his deep baritone voice, “But we’re going to need you to open your eyes, think you can do that for us?”

I opened them to a blinding light of a surgical lamp that was hanging above me, but the blinding effect wore off and I was greeted by a bland white room that looked like a doctors office. The world seemed to me more bright and less saturated in a brown out look that I had grown used to, everything was more defined and colors seemed to pop out and have a friendlier appeal to them than before.

“What... what happened?” I slurred as I slowly began to have the sense of my long elongated mouth returning to me.

“Well we helped ponify you by slipping some of the regular ponification serum into the tea, silly.” giggled Ice,

“What?!” I yelled as I lifted my long neck up in shock.

“Well yeah, we did because you kept on beating yourself up over the question and we saw you descend ever so slowly into sadness. So we came up with a plan to ponify you with the help of the PER... we’re sorry but we couldn’t see you beat yourself up like that.” said Silver as he nuzzled me, which made the rage subside.

“Alright... but what about my parents?” I asked wondering what they would think of my friends now that they turned me into a pony.

“Well, while you were out we called your home and told them you were hurt and we took you to the closest Bureau,” said Razor sitting down in front of me.

“I see, but what now?” I asked as I shifted my weight off the table and landed on the ground with my face.

“Well you start your new life Jacob, and trust me; You’re going to love it.” said Iron with a big grin on his face as he helped me up to all fours.
===
-Two years later to that day-

I flew through the skies crafting columns of clouds to my will. I felt so free and like all the cares of the world didn’t exist or had simply melted away. I can still remember two years back to this day when my four best friends turned me into a pony against my will. I was mad at them for a week or so as I went through the Bureau’s newfoal program, but I learned everything about being a true Equestrian during my stay and more.

I learnt that I was a pegasus with a cinnamon coat and brown mane with deep blue eyes. I learnt how to fly faster than I ever dreamed of, I also learned how to cook which helped me get my cutie mark of a frypan with a small column of flames coming forth out of the pan. I love my new life as a pegasus but I still sometimes missed my life as human but I quickly forgot about that as I soared through the skies over the harsh Australian land.

I was happy with my new life as a pegasus, and no longer Jacob Masterson, but as Cinnamon Stick, the wild cooking pegasus who drank a small cup of green tea that changed his life for the better.

===
Author’s Notes: Sorry this took so long, but life got in the way so I hope you enjoyed it as much as I had writing it and also thanks for Aegis, Wasteland Gunner, Cloudhammer and Silvertie for helping me with the editing of it.
-Da Bunnana King