//------------------------------//
// The Fart of July 
// Story: Super Mare-io Odyssey: A Story Untold 
// by Cool_Quick 
//------------------------------//

(Alternate P.O.V. in Mario and Luigi's home.)

Luigi hummed to himself, a little off-key. Might as well do something kinda enjoyable while washing dishes.

He looked at the clock for the 200th time that morning, and sighed. It was only 9:00. Another long day of waiting ahead.

Luigi was by now used to Mario suddenly disappearing and going off on adventures. He had been listening on the news to the latest coverage of Mario's latest adventure, but a couple of days ago, the Odyssey had suddenly vanished over the Ruined Kingdom under mysterious circumstances. People had many different theories about what had happened, anywhere from strong winds to aliens. Or even... magic.

Luigi snorted at the thought. Sure, some things here in the Mushroom Kingdom were a little unusual, but magic? Especially teleportation? Someone extremely powerful would have to be able to do that. And Luigi didn't think anyone or anything over there would be able to do something like that.

Sure, Luigi was a little nervous at Mario's disappearance, but not frightened. He figured Mario would turn up sooner or later with more or less of a "Fooled you!" attitude. In the meantime, Luigi had nothing to do but keep the house clean and wait.

And deal with unusual guests.

Wario and Waluigi often came by unexpectedly for something or other almost every day. They always seemed to show up around lunchtime, and were always immediately at the table to enjoy some of Luigi's lasagna, or whatever he cooked. If there was one thing Luigi was good at, it was cooking. Even if it did give Wario the farts. But then again, everything gave him the farts.

Luigi's mind returned to his dish washing, and he realized he had washed and rinsed the same dish about five times now.

Well, he thought with a smile. It's extra clean anyway.

He washed the last dish, and drained the water before walking to the living room. He sat on his green (of course) armchair, and looked at the calendar.

Then he quickly got up and ran out of the room. Well, tripped over the desk nearby and rolled out of the room, technically, but you get it.

It was the 4th of July.

And he forgot to put the American flag on his door.

Luigi searched through his cabinets, and through everything, even looking in his toilet bowl. Finally, he found it sitting, guess what, on the desk he'd tripped on. He'd put it there just this morning to remember later. 

Feeling silly and hobbling on a sore toe, Luigi went outside and hung the flag. He stood for a moment and admired how it swayed in the small breeze that blew.

Then, Luigi smelled the breeze. It smelled like garlic and something else... very disgusting.

He turned and saw Wario coming up the walkway.

Luigi sighed, and said "Good morning, Wario."

Wario grunted in response, and pushed his way inside, farting at a hummingbird that got a little too close to him.

Luigi sighed again, and followed Wario's dangerous behind cautiously, hoping Wario wouldn't target him too.

Wario immediately sat at the table and looked at Luigi expectantly. 

"Sorry," Luigi said. "Haven't made anything for lunch yet."

"Come on!" Wario grumbled. "I haven't eaten anything in a whole hour!"

Luigi rolled his eyes. "Can you please at least wait for another hour?"

"But..." Wario thought to himself, which was challenging for him. "That's another 60 minutes!!!" He groaned in anguish. "I will starve..."

Luigi left him sitting there moaning about how the world was unjust, and decided that he needed to sit on the back porch. Especially when he heard a loud fart erupt from behind him like a nuclear blast. That made him walk a bit faster.

Suddenly Wario appeared beside him.

"Where you going?" he asked.

"I was going to go be by myself for a bit, but someone is making that complicated."

"Really?" Wario wondered, looking around. "Whoever they are, they're quite rude."

Luigi ignored him, and tried to quickly go outside and close the door before Wario got out.

He didn't make it. Wario shoved through the door, and plopped at one of the seats near a table. Luigi sighed again, and sat as far away from Wario as he could.

The two sat, looking out at the lush hills and green trees flowing out into the distance, with mushroom shaped mountains far off almost out of sight. On a hill not too far away was Peach's castle, where undoubtedly Toads were bustling about, desperately hoping for their princesses' return. But for now, Luigi just enjoyed the peace and the serenity...

And then Wario released another butt blast. And the mood was ruined.

Luigi sighed. He knew Wario was like this every day.

What he didn't know was that in Equestria, Twilight was busy trying to practice a spell to transport Mario back to the Mushroom Kingdom. She'd want it later. Unfortunately for her, but fortunately for you Luigi fans, her spell was once again interrupted when across time and space, she heard a loud fart. It caused her to lose her concentration and send out a beam towards the source.

Luigi didn't notice the purple beam until Wario started farting rapidly like an ambulance siren and pointing at the sky.

The green plumber looked up just in time to be swallowed in bright purple light. He let out a surprised yelp, and screamed "MAAAAAAAAAAAAARIOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" as he began to vanish.

As suddenly as it had come, the light vanished.

So too, did Luigi. 

All that was left was a very surprised Wario, who gave a confused fart before getting up and heading back down the street.



(Mario's P.O.V. Button Mash's house)

"How long has it been since you've eaten, again?" Button's mom asked, eyebrow raised at my scarfing.

"Three hours," I exclaimed, my stomach growling intently at my slowness to provide it with some kind of sustenance. 

"And you're that hungry?" she inquired?

"Got to always be full of something," I remarked, as I dove into my sandwich. It may have been peanut butter, but it was good to my hungry tummy.

Button Mash sat beside me, still staring at me with a cartoonishly funny awed look on his face as if I was a famous movie star that had just given him a signed poster. I tried hard to concentrate on eating, because looking at him for longer than three seconds would get me laughing. Which would make me choke on my food. Not a good first impression.

I finished my food, and let Button's mom take my plate. I figured I'd be full for the next hour anyway.

Groaning, I realized I needed to take a restroom break. I went down the hall, and just as I was about to enter, I realized Button Mash was still following me with that look still on his face.

"Um," I said, waving a hand in front of him. "I'm trying to use the loo, if you don't mind."

Button finally seemed to remember what reality was. "Oh, right, sorry..." He gave an awkward smile as he stepped backwards and fell backwards down the stairs. "Oh, horseapples…" I heard.

"Language," his mother warned.

I smiled, and closed the door to do my business. As I did, I thought about what Button has said only a half hour before. Bowser means to marry Peach. They will marry in three days.

"Well," I said aloud. "I can't believe you did it Bowser. I never thought you'd do it."

This is Bowser we're talking about another voice inside me said. 

"Yeah," I said to my unseen voice. "But what would stop him after that from finding me? He'd locate me and find..." I realized then the mortal peril I was putting everyone in Equestria in. I had to get to Twilight's immediately.

I rushed out of the bathroom, and tumbled down the stairs the same way Button had. 

"What's wrong?" Button's mom asked.

"I've got to get back to Twilight's now!" I panted. "Bowser will be here looking for me with his entire fleet. Lives are at stake."

She seemed about to protest, but she knew that if I existed, Bowser existed. And he wasn't one for warnings. He was one of those "blow everything up, ask no questions" kind of people.

"Okay," she said. "Just be careful. It's only 4 in the morning, so watch where you step."

"Thanks," I said. "Button, you can come with, if your mom will allow."

"Please, mom?" Button asked, making an adorable puppy dog face.

"Be safe," she relented, giving him a hug. "I love you son."

I smiled and walked out the door as Button followed. I broke into a run as I left the walkway, and Button moved to match my pace on his small hooves.

"Where's Twilight's from here?" I asked between gasps of air.

"Just keep going down this road!" Button gasped back. "You'll see Pinkie's soon."

Sure enough, after about two minutes, Pinkie's distinctive Candy Land house came into view. I dashed in front of it, and saw Twilight's tree house (not to be confused with treehouse, very different) a couple of blocks away.

Luckily, hardly anyone was about at this early hour, and I made it very easily to Twilight's doorstep. I knocked frantically, not noticing a purple comet soaring in the sky.

"Yeah?" a bleary-eyed Spike asked as he opened the door. His face brightened a bit when he saw me. "Oh, Mario! You made it back!" He looked at Button. "Sup."

Button smiled awkwardly back.

"I have to speak to Twilight now," I said. "It's urgent."

"She's asleep..." Spike yawned as he raised his eyes to the sky. "The stars look really ni…" he suddenly snapped wide awake as he stared at something in the heavens. "Mario?"

I looked where he gazed, and saw the purple comet. It was heading fast right towards us.

"Look out!" I yelled and we scattered. Spike slammed the door, Button dove into a nearby hay cart, and I ran into an empty house nearby, possibly belonging to some rich family on vacation. Keys apparently were nonexistent here.

I heard a loud crash erupt as the comet struck in a field right behind Twilight's house. The force of it made my entire body rattle, and made the house shake. I waited for a minute before cautiously going outside. 

Button peeped out from his hay bale, and we made eye contact. I nodded, and he slowly followed me to the crash site.

Twilight was already there with her pin and paper, Spike close by, hiding in a bush. She looked at me and we nodded at each other.

I stepped forward. "Whoever you are, what are you and how did you get here?"

I heard a groan. It somehow sounded familiar.

"Come out of there so we can see you," Twilight said.

As the smoke cleared, the figure stepped forward. I was not expecting someone in a green undershirt, blue overalls, and a green cap to appear.

My face wore a comedic expression as I finally found enough voice to squeak, "Luigi?"