(Chem)
So, me and the others finally decided to do what we planned to. We have paired up, and are being sent to differnt targets.
I teamed up with the Courier, and we decided to kill the Head Treasurer. With him wearing his armor, we move to get a train to Canterlot.
We walk up to the ticket buying place, “Where to?”
I’ve also been forced to wear a cloak, one lended to me from Raven. I reach out, and make some money and place it on the desk, “Canterlot.”
He counts the coins, before giving us two tickets, “Say, didn’t this town only have one guard?”
I look at him in the eye, and think over his question, “I’m a high value target.”
“Then why haven’t I heard of you?”
“Because fuck you, that’s why.” Me and the Courier walk onto the train from there.
We sit on our seats, and prepare for the trip. The Courier decides to ask a question, “What’s the plan?”
I look at him, “You expect me to make a plan? My best plan is for me to somehow sneak in through some air ducts. You do what you wish.”
Neither of us questioned why the people on the train weren’t worried about our talk of assasination.
—(Courier)—
On the entire train ride, me and him talked about things too huge for the normal mind. So beautiful that we cannot inscribe it down on paper.
“Fuck bees.”
Ah, who am I kidding? We just talked about dumb shit the entire time. And I do not have enough patience to rethink about it.
Either way, the train stops. We get off, and walk into this universes Canterlot.
Gold, marble, and it was really the same as mine. There is definitely more gold than in mine, but it still is the same.
One building is made entirely of gold, and has a sign on the outside pronouncing it the Tresury, “Well, Chem, we know where we are going.”
Chem sets down the whiskey bottle he was drinking from, and nods, “You do what you will do, and I’ll do my shit. All I know is that we’ll manage to bullshit our way through in the end.”
And with that, Chem walks off into a side ally. Meaning it’s up to me to infiltrate this building.
And it’s now I remember I am seen as a guard.
I walk up to the door way, and I’m allowed through, “Thanks mates.”
One of the guards respond, “S’all right there mate.”
And I am thus able to go through.
I walk through the winding hallways of gold for a bit. Then I hear a rumbleing from above me.
It also happens that I was in a group of guards when I hear a shout, “Fucking bees!”
*CRASH!*
And with that crash, Chem falls onto the floor in front of me, “Fuck, that hurt.”
The guards around me all rush around him like hunting dogs, “INTRUDER! INTRUDER! INTRUDER!”
Chem takes a look around him, “Umm...” Then he lays his head back down, and plays dead.
The guards look at him, confused. One even pokes him with the blunt side of his spear, “Huh, he’s dead.”
“What do we do?”
“I’ve never had someone die on my watch before!”
“Let’s just hide the body!”
I sigh, and facepalm. I take out a grenade, and throw it out, “Oh no, another intruder.”
*BOOM!*
The guards heads lock in the direction of the explosion. They all rush off, “Stop right there criminal scum!”
“STOP!! You’ve violated the law!”
“You’ve committed crimes against Dawnguard and her people!”
“I’m just going with the crowd!”
I look back at Chem, “You played dead? I respect that.”
Chem looks back at me, nods, then floats back into the vent.
I can hear the guards shouting in the distance, “There’s nothing here!”
“We’ve been bamboozoled again!”
I just continue to the Heads office.
I eventually arrive, and see a single guard outside his office. I walk up to him, “I’m your relief.”
He nods at me, “I feel sad for you. This is the worst job in the entire Dawnguard military.”
“Tell me about it.”
The guard walks off, and I wait five minutes more to make sure he’s gone.
When I am sure, I open the door and enter. Sitting at a desk is a grey earth pony wearing speticals. He is holding up some gold, and is stareing at it intently, “Hello there, guard.”
I walk closer, “I am the Courier.”
He doesn’t even look up, “The Courier? Quite the odd name for a guard. And quite the odd shape. Deadly skinny, and six feet two? My, might want to get that checked at your next doctors appointment.”
I walk closer still, “I am no guard. I am the Courier.”
“Is that name supposed to mean something to me? Fine, if your a courier, What is your delivery? I’m busy doing my job.”
He only looks up when he feels the cool metal of my revolver against his forehead, “My delivery is your death.”
*BANG!*
I blow his brains out, and then step back. I get unnecessary happy, “Fuck yes! I’ve always wanted to use that line!”
Then I look at the huge vault at the back of the room, “Now, how do I get in to steal stuff?”
I look at the desk, and find a key. Next to it is a note, “So, if I open it from the outside I will be electrocuted until death? Man, that sucks.”
*click, Bang!*
I look up as the vault opens. Standing there is Chem, wearing a tilted golden crown on his head. He smiles at me, “So, you want to loot some bitchin magical swag?”
I smile back, “Yeah, let’s get all that bitchin magical swag. I want to make the economy like Africa’s water supply!”
Chem throws me a golden chain necklace, wich I throw on, “Then let’s get started.”