On that Friday morning, Discord leaned up against the limousine taxi that stood in waiting in the hallway. This was the first thing that other students noticed as they happened to walk by the long, yellow carriage that has the word “Taxi” written on its side. The second thing that students notice is how the Draconequus was dressed in a uniform that had the same motif as the carriage from the bright yellow vest to the hat that has a checkered strip wrapped around it. And the third thing the student's notice was the cardboard neon sign that he held that read: “1st Period + Starlight.”
“I thought vehicles weren’t allowed in the halls.” Discord looked over to see Starlight with a clipboard.
“Well good morning to you too.” He tipped his hat. “I hope you’re ready for today’s lesson on Monsieur Rousseau.”
“So what’s the taxi for?”
“To get everyone where they need to be. Obviously. I’m going to take you and the class out on a field trip to illustrate today’s lesson.”
“Do you always take your students out on field trips?”
“If you mean within Equestria, then… sometimes. Other times I bring them to other universes if I deemed it necessary. It really depends on the lesson.” As Discord was talking, he rounded over to one the back of the taxi doors in which, like a chauffeur, he opened it for her. “If you’re going to inspect me, would you like to see how I’m going to drive my students?”
Starlight craned her head in, there she found the taxi was glorified by comfortable seating, a mini fridge in which was full of water and snacks, a couch, a painting of Discord, swinging chandeliers, a Hearth's Warming tree, a baby grand piano, a shrubbery, a fireplace, a bobblehead of Twilight that reads: “I’m the smartest except when I’m not,” and speakers that hung overhead of each seat.
“What’s all this stuff for?” She asked.
“All the distracting comforts of civilization, of course.”
Starlight raised an eyebrow. “Being cryptic today, aren’t we?”
“Morning Mr. Discord,” the two of them turned to find Gallus, who along with the rest of his classmates too were examining the taxi. “Is this your ride or…?”
“Since all of you are here, I figured we can just go right ahead and jump into today’s lesson. When the thing starts moving, keep your hooves, claws, tentacles, tails, muzzles, manes, pointy ears or any other appendages inside the vehicle at all times. Otherwise, something will eventually come off.”
After the students, including their councilor, climbed into the taxi, Discord hooked himself onto the front of the carriage in which he began to pull through the hallways and out of the school. Once they were out and after tapping on his hat a few times to make sure the speakers were working, he began.
“Good morning class and extra guess who I hope to impress enough not to fire me again. Today’s discussion is going to take on an interesting detour on a guy that at one point called for the end of civilization itself. Only, he’s not considered a villain surprisingly enough. For today’s lesson, we’re diving into the guy that preferred to have feelings above rational reason that may or may not have invented the Romantic Movement, Monsieur Rousseau.”
Inside the luxurious taxi, a portrait replaced that of their teacher’s. It was a sketch drawing of an earth pony with the clothing of three hundred years ago of a curly, powdered wig, an overcoat with hundreds of buttons while reclining on a rock while holding a plant in his hoof.
Ocellus raised a hoof. “Uh, Mr. Discord, what was that part about him wanting to end Civilization?”
“Ah, right, some background.” Their teacher replied as he continued to carry them through the town, a little more faster every second. “No doubt that a good chunk of your societies worships the idea of progress. That life gets a little bit better, technology gets more advanced, movies up the annite, that you’d be making a little more money and you’ll be getting more luxury goods then you could afford but at the same time you know that you’ll eventually go into debt in which your grandchildren’s grandchildren will be able to pay it off because life is so good. For those of you who lived is such a society that rolls out the red carpet when it comes to progress, it seems like civilization is going towards a positive direction from our old savage and ignorant ways towards prosperity for all.
“And yet, there was one philosopher from the eighth century, during the Age of Reason that violently disagreed with the idea. In fact, while in Prance, our guy, Monsieur Rousseau read a copy from his usual subscribed newspaper that had an advert for someone to write an essay on the subject if the world is getting better through the advances in art, science, and technology. So one epiphany later, it came to him that civilization, with all its progress, had not improved anyone. If anything, he argued that it made the quality of life worse.”
“Uh, Discord.” Starlight said with increasing alarm as the taxi zoomed out of town and were whizzing past forest and deserts. “Where are you taking us?”
“We will arrive at our destination soon enough. Now, where was I?”
“Something about an essay?” Silverstream asked as she too could only look out the windows to see the world becoming a blur.
“Ah yes!” After thanking Silverstream, Discord continued. “If anything, one thing you must keep in mind that he isn’t suggesting that everyone that happens to be in a civilized place are all bad. Far from it. Monsieur Rousseau firmly believes that everyone, all ponies to gryphon, Yak to Dragon and everything in between were naturally born good. Just remember that from what I say from here: he’s not attacking those that run civilization, but the system that they follow by that does all the corruption. Which I think, is what he meant by, ‘All creatures are born free, and everywhere they are in chains.’ To illustrate his point, we have to make our first stop someplace far, far, very far, and further still, away.”
All around them, the rushing flashes of color and shapes slowed down until the blur gave way to a foreign landscape. One of tall, dry grass and the occasional tree that dotted about here and there. A landscape where mountains dotted the horizon, but hills were rare. The taxi slowed down enough until it came to a complete stop near the top of a hill, in which Discord instructed for them to step out as he has something to show them.
As the students climbed out and into the intense sunlight, Starlight asked while shielding her eyes, “Where the hay are we?”
“This is the grasslands of Zebraca.” Discord answered. “We are nearly in the center of the content in which I’m about to show you merely one of the thousands of tribes within this corner of the world. Come with me to the top and I’ll show you.”
Curious, the students and Starlight walked up the hill in which they found a telescope that pointed out towards a village in the distance.
“As to what his essay said,” Discord continued his lecture, “is that he offered up a simple argument: that individuals had once been both good and happy, but once the idea of society rolled in did they become plagued by wickedness. He lays the cornerstones of his argument on what he called ‘The State of Nature,’ in which he imagined what life at the beginning of history might have been like. And one of the sources he used to illustrate this golden past was from reports of tribes throughout the world during his time, such as this one for example.
“For this, I simply want all of you to look through the spyglass and tell us what you see.”
Yona was the first to trot up to the telescope that rested on a tripod. Standing up on her two hind hooves, she peered through the glass. “Look like village.” She began to describe, “One of Zebras, though not big. Yak sees mares fixing roof while foals play game by tree over there.”
“Let me see that.” Smolder got her friend out of the way to peer through. “Well, there are some huts in a variety of sizes and shapes. Look simply but they’re decorated with paint of some kind. And I see there’s a small group of stallions at the edge of the village that they’re gambling on something. Can’t blame them really, since there doesn’t seem that much to do.”
“Can I see?” Sandbar asked as he tapped the dragoness on the shoulder. She moved aside so that he too can see through it. “I can’t tell much, but they do look happy from where I can see. But Smolder is right on this, I don’t see how they’re able to occupy themselves.”
Next, Ocellus asked if she could have a look too. “For a small place,” she commented as she looked into the telescope, “at least they seem to be a lively bunch.”
Silverstream took her turn. “I wish I can go up to meet them, they look friendly enough. And look! Someone has a garden there with plants that I never have seen before.”
“Hey, let me take a look,” Gallus said as he took the telescope into his claw, “they don’t look that rich if I have to be honest. I don’t see a scrap of metal anywhere. It’s like they’re stuck in the stone age.”
Now it was Starlight’s turn to look through. “You know, I have visited Zecora a few times in the past, but these guys don’t seem to have the same sort of style as hers’.” Backing away from the telescope, she put her hoof to her chin in thought. “I wonder if this is some other tribe?”
“Like I said,” Discord reminded, “this is merely one of the thousands in this land. So, it’s unlikely that this was her tribe. But anyway, since all of you have gotten your first glance at this tribe, I want to ask a simple question: do you think those in that village down there, who rarely encounter those outside from civilization, live a better life?”
The young gryphon folded his arms. “If I have to be honest Mr. Discord,” he said, “I don’t really think so.”
“Oh? And why’s that?”
“I mean… don’t get me wrong. I guess they’re happy doing that they’ve always have done. But do they have things that we have like… oh I don’t know… medicine that works? Trade? Food that isn’t spoiled? Or knowledge of how to do things better?”
Before Discord could question his argument, Starlight beat him to it. “Are you saying that those who have those things are better off?”
“All I’m saying is that at least places like Equestria has things that make life comfortable and has certain things to make sure we don’t die by the age of thirty.”
Discord shrugged. “Now that that’s a legitimate argument.” He said as he made his way towards the taxi. “However, let’s all get a closer look at this tribe. Everyone, hop back in, our next stop is that village down there.”
So after getting back into the elongated taxi, Discord quickly took them toward the very edge of the village, in which locals took notice of them. After their teacher quickly opened the door to let his students and Starlight out, three male Zebras approached them. Each holding a spear.
The one in the middle walked up towards them. “Ngubani oza edolobheni lethu?” (Who comes to our city?)
Discord stepped forward, placing both his paw and claw together and nodded to him. “Sawubona. Ngingumfundisi, ngubani nabantu bami abafisa ukukukhombisa le ndawo. Ngibafundise ngezindlela zalaba bantu ukubasiza ukuba baqonde iqiniso elihle. Manje, ngikhuluma nobani?” (Hi. I am a teacher, who and my students wish to show them this place. I came to teach them about the ways of this tribe to help them understand the great truth. Now, whom am I talking to?)
As the two of them talked back and forth, Starlight glanced over at the students, who were just as confused as she was. Discord and the Zebra spoke in a language that flew over their heads and relied on their expressions to grasp what was being said. After a minute of talking and a smile from the head Zebra, they tapped their spears twice before returning towards the village.
“Mind filling us in what that was about?” Smolder said, speaking for all of them.
“I was explaining to the… well, this tribe’s equivalent of the Captain of the Guard who we are, why we’re here, and that we wouldn’t be here for long as I told him that I’m going to allow all of you to observe their culture up close.”
As they too start to walk towards the village, Starlight went up towards Discord’s side. “I didn’t know you can speak their native language, Discord.”
The Draconequus shrugged. “You didn’t ask. Being as old as I am, I’ve been able to pick up the local lingo. Such as dead ones, living ones, cryptic ones, ancient, new, haven’t been invented, undecipherable, baby, musical, mathematical, censored, uncensored, made up, unmade-up, alien and Equestrian. Come to think of it, I guess it would be faster to name off the languages that I don’t know.”
“Such as?” Gallus raised an eyebrow.
“The languages of order, rules and consistency.”
Starlight deadpanned. “I should have seen that coming.”
The class walked into the village in which the Zebras became curious about them. Many of them reached out to touch the fur, feathers, scales and hide of these strangers. While those like Sandbar, Gallus, and Smolder were uncomfortable of them reaching into their personal spaces. Silverstream giggled as a few of them found her ticklish spots, Starlight courteously reached out to shake hooves with them, while Yona interpreted this to pick them up one by one to bearhug them.
For the next several minutes, although none except for Discord could understand what they were saying, the students were able to learn about the tribe. Although the village was very small, they could tell that this was a close community that resembled that of a large family with foals playing about while the older ponies keep an eye on them. Here, a pair of brothers chop firewood; there, sisters learned carefully as an elderly mare combined herbs into a paste; above the mares weave to repair the roofs from a strong wind; below stallions cultivate gardens of food and herbs that they till up the soil. By a tree, a teenager practices (and fails) at the flute while inside a hut a shamare reads the dropped seeds upon the ground. By the edge of the town, stallions with spears chit-chatted away telling jokes while the youngest foals play games using stones and marked certain spots in the dust.
The students noticed how much and how often the tribe smiling as they showed and introduced to their ways of life. As curious as they were, the students saw how genuine this tribe was to show kindness, love of their families, their humble respect for the natural and mystical, and the mutual respect they have for one another as they seemed to offer it up to them too.
Once they’ve been showed everything, Starlight asked, “Okay, as much as I’ll give you points for showing your students a new culture, what does this have anything to do with Rousseau?”
After calling his students to gather around him, he explained. “Class, what are your impressions of this village?”
“This place is super friendly!” Silverstream said with glee. “Even though I have no idea what they’re talking about, they’re really interesting with how they live and how they get along.”
“I’ll give them this,” Smolder commented, “it maybe primitive, but something tells me that these guys got it figured out, ya know?”
Discord grinned. “Monsieur Rousseau would have agreed with you. In his mind, this very village here was what he thought early life for your ancestors might have been like. That before the shop was invented to swindle all of your money or read newspapers to get depressed over, early creatures from all over had a simple life to which they had a better understanding of their own minds. As you can see, this is because there were less distractions that didn’t get in the way of their basic of needs. This village, if not this tribe perfectly illustrates what he envisioned your ancestors were like before civilization. To someone like Rousseau, this was the state of nature as it was intended to be.”
Ocellus raised a hoof. “Mr. Discord, why exactly did Rousseau not like Civilization?”
Their teacher told them that in order to understand, they have to take the taxi once more. So after bidding the village farewell, they climbed aboard to which Discord took the vehicle into hyper speed. Colors and lights once again zoom past and around them for a minute until the taxi slowed down, showing the students and Starlight that the landscape had changed dramatically.
In place of the tall grassy valley, hills, trees, and mountains in the distant, now they look out the windows to a crowded place of skyscrapers made out of steel and glass, bright lights, blurring sounds, and a sea of ponies that crisscross every which way in a confusion of flow.
Starlight pressed against the glass as she looked around. “Are we in Manehattan?”
No sooner had she said that did colorful lights flashed and trumpets blurred in the taxi, in which Discord announced. “Congratulations Starlight! You have won our unofficial guessing game! For this, you win bragging rights for knowing Elementary Geography. Sunburst must be so proud.”
A groan later, Starlight inquired. “Okay, ha-ha, very funny. So why are we in Manehattan? In Times Square no less?”
“Class,” their teacher on the intercom said, “so just by looking around while we’re going to be stuck in traffic for a bit, what is your first impression of this gem of civilization?”
“This place huge!” Yona observed.
“I’ve heard the city can get crowded, but I didn’t think it was like this.” Ocellus commented as she and her friends looked around. “They’re so many.”
“Well I’ll give Manehattan this,” Gallus said, “in a place like this, you won’t get bored quickly.”
Silverstream opened a window in which she stuck her head out. “How is anyone able to find their way ar- Ohh! Shiny thing.”
Smolder rolled her eyes at first, but she took a moment to look all around her. “Is it me, or do these ponies seem as if they’re… you know… not all there? If that makes any sense.”
“You mean like they’re not paying attention to everyone around them?” Sandbar asked, and his friend nodded.
“Sandy is onto something here.” The students looked up to find their teacher poking his head through an escape hatch that no one had noticed before. “Looks like we’re stuck in gridlock so climb up to the roof, I have something to show you.” Adding the feature of a spiral staircase with a snap, the students and Starlight followed the Draconequus to the roof of the taxi in which they gaze out to the seemingly never-ending lines of carriages and ponies complaining.
“In Monsieur Rousseau’s eyes,” Discord said as he casually floated around his students, “things really gone downhill once your ancestors moved from the village to the city. Ever since the first of many civilizations popped up, some noticed that the more places like this try to simplify their lives, the more complicated it got. Over the centuries where food became more abundant, where luxury goods became affordable, the earliest of royalty, priests, and warlords quickly entered into a popularity contest to do all they can to stay at the top in which, they get more stuff. For Rousseau, this march towards progress had sparked within many a narcissistic self-love that worshiped an artificial life of pride, jealousy, and vanity.”
It was at this very point did Smolder raise a claw. “Excuse me but… artificial? I don’t know about you, but pride, jealousy, and vanity come naturally to everyone, not just dragons.”
“Is that so?” Discord musingly asked as he slithers over to her. “Tell me, when we were at that village, did you see any signs of pride, jealousy or vanity from the tribe we just saw?”
“Well…” The dragoness opened her mouth to argue… only the more she thought back to a few minutes ago, the more she realized that the Zebras didn’t show any of that. She didn’t recall one that acted boastful, or envious of them, or even arrogant. “Not really.”
“But for a moment there, you almost said otherwise.” Discord pointed out. “And I think I might know why. While you dragons have a different idea what being civilized is, you do have a structure that is no more different than those of your friends.”
The Draconequus pointed out the bright lights of Times Square, of the advertisements and celebrities that looked down, of the shops and theaters that were around them. “Let’s face it,” their teacher said, “These sorts of vices seem to come to you naturally because you live in a setting that makes you think that it’s normal. And this, for Monsieur Rousseau, is the underlining part of the problem with civilization. That once you encounter places like Manehattan, the very first thing you do is to compare yourself to those around to make sure that you look just like, if not better than your neighbors. And after centuries of doing just that, the state of nature becomes nothing but background noise.”
“But what exactly have we lost?” Gallus questioned. “I mean sure, the village life may have been peaceful, but are you saying that it’s better to live in a cave than taking advantage of the progress that we enjoy now?”
With a thoughtful look on his face, Discord said, “Gallus, look at these pedestrians, and I do mean, really look at them, and tell me what you see.”
The young gryphon (along with his class) now turned towards the sidewalks in which the ponies hardly paid any attention to them as they trotted along. “Okay uh… For one, I see a lot of them are wearing suits. Kinda look alike in a way. Some of them have briefcases or carrying bags around. The mares… well… there’s a lot of jewelry, and maybe the occasional hat. And a lot of those hats look the same to me too…” After looking up and down the sidewalk, he added, “Do I find it weird that these ponies are all dressed up but no one is really noticing them either? It’s like they’re all a rush to get somewhere as they’re just, I don’t know, minding their own business.”
Discord nodded. “Good, good. Now compare this crowd to the tribe, what’s different here?”
Before Starlight could give an answer, Discord put a claw to her lips, giving her a look to allow his students to answer.
Silverstream was the one that spoke up. “Maybe it’s me,” she began, “but these ponies seem busy, like they don’t have time for meeting anyone new. Or… anything else for that matter. Just care about themselves.”
“Yeah,” Ocellus nodded, “even with these advertisements, they seem to serve either getting money or highlighting someone. Plus, it’s a really distracting environment.”
Discord smiled as he embraced them both. “There are my geniuses! You two get a cookie bird.” With a snap of his tail, two chocolate chip birds perched on Silverstream and Ocellus’s heads.
Their teacher continued, “What Rousseau’s point here, is that civilized folks have forgotten to think about what they wanted and felt, so they spend their time to imitate those around them. Where they enter into dead-end jobs to bore themselves to death or become ruthless in a competition for money and status. All the while, losing sight of their own sensations among the white noise of the city.”
Starlight raised an eyebrow. “You know, when you put it like that, you’re making Rousseau sound like a hippie that would rather live in the woods then go near a town.”
“And it’s very easy to think that way too.” Discord nodded. “But to that, I must point out two things. The first being that the heart of Rousseau’s philosophy is his emphasis on virtue. He was simply pointing out that while civilized folks can claim that life is getting better because of all the fancy gadgets and new knowledge that help you get older, less sick and able to connect with the whole world, all that progress will mean zilch if you don’t have the virtue to improve yourself by.
“If anything, there’s a reason why he coined the term ‘noble savage’ is to best describe the innocence and integrity of your ancestors. Which is ironic if you think about it. That those in Equestria would call the tribe we’ve met savages because they don’t have a toilet, or newspapers, or have built palaces for an alicorn that demands the sacrifice of cake. Yet, if you asked Monsieur Rousseau, he would say that it is the tribe that is nobler then the entirety of Manehattan put together as they have a higher standing on virtue.”
Starlight then asked, “And the other thing?”
“He said what he said as a sort of chastisement for places like Equestria, or (in his time) pre-revolutionary Prance. Back at a time when the Age of Reason was on the rise and countries were ruled by royalty that had a much bigger say than everyone else. All this critique about thinking that we are better than the so-called ‘savages’ when our own society makes much less sense than does the tribes of Zebrica, or the Islands of the South Luna Seas, or even the fringed North Pole.
“However, Rousseau wasn’t attacking the people who run such societies but rather the structure of society itself. So is it any wonder that he became a muse to the Prench Revolution when they overthrew their incompetent king and restructured society from scratch? There was a reason why during a time when they were chopping heads left and right that they placed huge importance on virtue. That they were trying to give civilization new priorities by going back to the values of the village: by looking at what they think and felt as nature demands it. “Nature never deceives us,’ he says, ‘it is we who deceive ourselves.’”
Smolder raised a claw, “There’s something I think that Rousseau overlooked.”
Discord raised an eyebrow. “Oh? And that being?”
“I may be young, but if there’s anything I’ve learned about progress, is that we can’t go back. Even I noticed this with us Dragons that once the change happens, it’s really hard to go back even if we try, especially if most are comfortable with the change. Sure, the guy you’re teaching may have some good points here and there, but we can’t just go back to the tribe.”
“Maybe not,” Discord said, “but that doesn’t mean that we can’t learn from the past either. Sure, the thing about progress is that it keeps moving forward, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t do so by staying true to who you are authentically, even if doing so is hard. ‘To live in virtue, we always have to fight with ourselves.’ What Monsieur Rousseau is trying to say in a nutshell, is that regardless of how civilized you may think you are, the old tribe may have a few things to teach.”
Noticing the time, the teacher, students and Starlight got back in the taxi. Soon they were moving again at an impossible speed. Before they reached the hallways of the school, Discord’s voice on the intercom came through saying: “Attention students, before we make our return to the school, I have an announcement to make and a favor to ask. Due to your concerned parents/guardians who just now found out that I’m teaching all of you, I’m about to be put under scrutiny again to see if I’m qualified to be your teacher.”
A collective groan from the students was heard.
“And I know that this is a little frustrating for all of you.” Discord continued. “But for this, I have a feeling that I will need your help one last time.”
“To do what exactly?” Ocellus inquired.
“Tomorrow, I’m going to have a special class in which all of your attendance is mandatory. But don’t worry, what I have in mind for all of you to do shouldn’t be hard, as tomorrow, I will be inviting Spike to join you.”
“Why Spike?” Sandbar asked. “And what do you want us to do?”
“Not to give too much away,” their teacher replied, “but tomorrow morning, we’re going to have ourselves a trial that will show your parents how they shouldn’t worry about me being your teacher. I will be teaching, of course, but it is very important that you all come, at the same time in my classroom. So, any questions?”
“Mr. Discord,” Silverstream raised her claw, “what are we going to learn about tomorrow?”’
For a moment, Discord didn’t respond over the intercom as the blur from the windows slowed down to bring their school’s hallway into focus. “That I’m keeping as a surprise. As soon at the taxi stops, class is dismissed.”
Soon the taxi did come to a stop, right in front of Discord’s classroom door in which he let them and Starlight out. After his students said that they will see him tomorrow, Starlight came up to Discord as he put away the uniform. The Draconequus asked how well he did.
Starlight looked over her notes as she flipped through the clipboard. “Well, apart of the long-distance field trip, you were able to stay on topic while having your students interact with you through answering questions and demonstrating examples. You were clear, knowledgeable about the topic, and overall, did a good job at teaching them your lesson. It seems to me, in my opinion, that you qualify of being a teacher.”
The mare jumped as fireworks exploded as Discord jumped up with a “WOOHOO!” before having to quickly put out the potential fire hazard.
“Mind warning somepony before you do that?” Starlight scolded. “Anyway, while you have certainly convinced me that you’re worthy to teach. All that’s left now is convincing the parents.”
“Oh don’t worry about that. I’m prepared to do so.” He then leaned forward. “However, I think I would need you and Twilight though.”
“Why? I already said that you're qualified-”
“No, I wasn’t talking about that. Rather, considering what I have in mind tomorrow, I need the both of you to be there.”
“Like support?”
Discord mused, “Something like that.”
“Okay, tell you what,” she said as she put the clipboard away, “I’ll be here to support you, but you have to do all the talking when the parents come. Understand.”
“Oh I understand perfectly,” he said with a sly grin, “if anything, I’m planning to use it to my advantage.”