//------------------------------//
// It Isn't the Mane Thing About You 
// Story: Unpleasant Correspondence 
// by StormLuna 
//------------------------------//

Dear Princess Celestia, 

I swear, Rarity is such a fucking drama queen.  In her less than infinite wisdom the dumb bitch wound up using remover potion on her mane and over half of it fell out.  Then all she did was cry and whine because she couldn't command other ponies' attention.  Good grief, the way she was bitching you'd think she was a princess who couldn't command other ponies' attention.  

Oh well, in the end she dyed what she had left and then still made it into Vanity Mare so I suppose not all is lost.  Now a ton of ponies are wearing that hideous mane style.  Now that is further proof that this nation is full of idiots, idiots that are undeserving of superior ponies such as us ruling over them. 

Thinking Rarity is an Idiot, 

Princess Twilight Sparkle 





Dear Princess Twilight, 

Wow, this letter reminds me of one that would have been written before you befriended all of them.  Is that friendship dying or are you simply having a bad moment.  Whichever it is, you're right about Rarity.  She is nothing short of a fucking drama queen that needs to be tortured or at least smacked a few times.  Now regarding her still getting into Vanity Mare, that is a shame.  I'm pretty sure that she is going to go boasting non-stop now about how her mane is so awesome, or should I say was so awesome.  I will admit, that punk look she had going on was a vast improvement over the hideous look she has returned to. 

Feel free to tell her that too.  I never have been fond of any of those five that I initially cursed you upon but let this be a learning lesson for you, never go out of your way to help a drama queen.  I see everypony up here with that punk look and I can't help but think they have no originality.  The good thing though, none of your old friends went for it.  They kept their same sexy appearances they have always had. 

Disgusted By the Copycat Mane Styles, 

Princess Celestia 





Dear Zecora, 

Why didn't you notice that I took the wrong potion?  I had one of the worst freakouts of all time!

Curious, 

Rarity





Rarity, 

You knocked over the table so I am not to blame.  If one is to be fair, you made it in Vanity Mare because of your hair. 

Sincerely, 

Zecora 





Dear Princess Celestia, 

Can you believe it?  After what seemed to be a disaster I was able to make it into Vanity Mare thanks to my friends!  I tell you, Twilight has come so far.  I remember back when she was a total bitch and would have laughed in my face.  Instead she helped me see that I should shine from the inside out and that is what I did.  What is the best is that everypony is now sporting my punk look.  I bet even everypony up in Canterlot is, even you! 

Happy I Made it into Vanity Mare, 

Rarity





Dear Rarity, 

Ugh, you're going to start boasting over this?  Look, that punk look was a vast improvement over that hideous style you normally have but not everypony up here is wearing it.  I'm not, my sister isn't nor are Twilight's old friends.  Those four know they're sexy the way they are and aren't about to do anything to risk their status as the four hottest unicorns in Canterlot. 

What a shame Twilight isn't the same bitch she used to be.  Listening to her belittle you and....oh wait, she did belittle you and call you a drama queen.  Before you go off on her about that she was not stating her opinion, she was stating a fact.  One good thing about Twilight these days, she tells things like they are.

Not into the Punk Look, 

Princess Celestia