//------------------------------// // No Second Prances // Story: Unpleasant Correspondence // by StormLuna //------------------------------// Dear Sunbutt, I want to start out by letting you know that at first I was not thrilled with my pupil's choice of a first friend outside of my acquaintances. When she brought Trixie into the castle I knew that she would be nothing but trouble and of course I was right. Here I thought Starlight was going to be a great student but all of a sudden the only thing running through her mind was Trixie. I even suggested new friends that aren't on my bad side but would she listen to me? No she didn't because apparently even she wants to troll me which is something that did not make me happy. Now I do find it kind of funny that Trixie kept her from attending that dinner and caused you to waste your time. Oh well, its not like you had anything important on your schedule anyway. Hey, it kept you away from my old friends for a night so it isn't all bad, right? Now I suppose I shouldn't be quite as upset as I am because you are not going to believe this, Starlight and Trixie are not only friends now but they are friends with benefits. I certainly hope that this will cause Fluttershy to see that Starlight isn't loyal and will run off at the drop of a hat to befriend a pony who can give her horn sex. Yes Fluttershy is hot but hey, if it meant me getting horn sex, I'd hook up with another unicorn too....or even better, force PETA Girl to join me and this unicorn. I don't see Starlight doing this though, her and Trixie have simply bonded way too much and together they are already keeping me up all night with their damn squealing and moaning. Now the time has finally come. Since Starlight will no longer be there to protect PETA Girl from me, her initiation ceremony will be soon, very soon! Ready to Initiate Fluttershy, Princess Twilight Sparkle Dear Princess Celestia, You are not going to believe this. While Fluttershy and I have been friends with benefits for a while now I came across an incredibly hot unicorn, one who has a checkered past like me. We spent some time together, I helped her with her show and then naturally we never showed up for that supper because we had more important items on our agenda, much more important issues. Now I am going to admit, Trixie is good, very good! I am so happy that Twilight gave me the assignment of making a new friend or I would never have met Trixie nor would I have ever found an exclusive bestie with benefits. Who knows though, perhaps her and I may become more. One thing I do know though, Twilight isn't thrilled and I think I know why, she is jealous! She is jealous that I have a hot mare as a special friend, something she will never have. Oh and sorry we missed that supper but hey, having fun is much more important, right? Trixie's New Bestie With Benefits, Starlight Glimmer Dear Fluttershy, I am writing you to let you know that I met another friend, a very hot unicorn named Trixie. We have talked and she knows all six of you but there is one thing about her. Her and I had a special experience and we are now besties with benefits. However, I do not want to give our special friendship up so I was thinking that perhaps you could join the two of us. Yes I know you have a bad history with her but she has changed. She is no longer a bitch hell bent on revenge, she is a sweet pony who wants to be friends with more ponies than just me. Just give it a shot, I'm sure you'll like it and like mine, her horn will be to die for! Your Friend With Benefits, Starlight Glimmer Dear Starlight, What? I share my body with you and give you a special kind of friendship that nopony else did and this is how you repay me? Let me guess, Trixie gave you horn sex and now you can't get enough of her. Is that why you decided to make her your bestie, is it because she can give you horn sex while I can't? What pisses me off more is that you have the audacity to suggest that I join you two. Why, just so that you will still have me and you can have her as well? You know what, fuck that shit. I honestly wonder if you aren't any better than Twilight wanting my body like that. Hell you might actually be worse because you not only expect me to put out for you now but that bitch Trixie too? No, I will not do that. To be honest, I would rather let Twilight initiate me roughly than ever let Trixie get into my coat. Yes Twilight is a bitch and won't leave me alone but at least she never pulled anything like what Trixie has. You know what, the hell with you. Also, if Trixie was to run off and leave you out in the cold, don't come running back to me. Yes we can still be friends but as far as benefits go, never again. Angry and Hurt, Fluttershy Dear Starlight, First off I want to let you know that I am not thrilled that you would have the audacity to skip that very important supper. Normally a punishment for such an act would be the moon for a few decades but since you not only upset Twilight but also gave her a new chance to make somepony else miserable, I'll forgive you. I have seen Trixie and I must say, you do have a good taste in "friends" with benefits. I can already tell that the two of you will be perfect for one another. Now I do have a favor to ask of you, take Trixie into your bedroom, make love to her and be extremely loud so that you can not only keep Twilight up at night, but also make her jealous. I know she is envious of you, especially since you now have a lover that can give you what you give her. Oh, and if it ever comes down to it, I'll officiate the wedding, make Twilight set it up and make her parents pay for it! Sincerely, Princess Celestia To Starbutt, Wait a minute, you mean to tell me that your pupil has already been corrupted by another pony, by one that you don't like? You have no idea how thrilled I am. I had a feeling that someday somepony would come along and lead Starlight astray. I am just glad that it wasn't a pony that you had no history with and I am certainly glad that it wasn't PETA Girl making Starlight more than a friend. Want to know why, because now you can resume making her life miserable and be miserable after she shoots you down, again and again. Who knows though, Fluttershy may be so devastated over her "friend" betraying her and hooking up with a pony that can give what she gives that she may become desperate. If that is the case, she may throw all her standards out the window and allow you to initiate her. If that does indeed happen, let me know all the juicy details so I'll know if I would want to join the two of you. Wait a minute, I don't know why I'm bringing this up because it will never happen. Oh well though, a mare can fantasize right? Always the Best, Princess Celestia P.S. You know something, that silverware of yours looks incredibly familiar. Upon further inspection I discovered that you must have stolen mine since your castle didn't have any. Naturally I am not very happy so I have decided that I will fine your parents for the cost of the set and if they refuse to pay, well further punishment will have to take place. Dear Fluttershy, You should be thanking The Great and Powerful Trixie for stealing Starlight away from you because Trixie knows that you have always wanted Twilight to initiate you and since Starlight won't be there to protect you anymore, she can come pay you a special visit. Tell you what, Trixie will even notify Twilight that you want her and perhaps you will have somepony to give you what Starlight no longer will. Starlight's New Bestie and Lover, The Great and Powerful Trixie Dear Twilight, The Great and Powerful Trixie has some wonderful news for you. She has communicated with Fluttershy and she wants you to initiate her! Since Starlight will no longer be there to provide her with the horn sex she has grown to love, she wants YOU. The Great and Powerful Trixie advises that you hurry up and pay her a visit before she changes her mind. Sincerely, The Great and Powerful Trixie Dear Trixie, Seriously, Fluttershy wants me to initiate her? Sweet, I'll have to go and take care of that right now! Thanks for letting me know about this and thank you even more for taking Starlight away from her! Thankful for You, Princess Twilight Sparkle Trixie, You honestly think I want Twilight to initiate me? Look, just because you stole Starlight away from me does not mean that I am going to go crazy without horn sex and Twilight is the last pony I would ever do that with. I'll just have to see if Rarity will take me back. If she comes and bothers me, so help me I will see to it that you are punished and punished severely. Hoping Twilight Doesn't Bother Me, Fluttershy Twilight Velvet and Night Light, I am writing to you over matters of great importance. After your daughter got her new castle, she had the audacity to break into the palace and steal my silverware! Now this is a very serious crime and I have decided that since you raised your daughter to be a thief that you shall pay for this, here is the invoice. Cost of the silverware she stole................................................30,000 bits Cost of my new replacement silverware..................................85,000 bits Subtotal.......................................................................................115,000 bits Inconvenience fee of 29.95%.....................................................34,442.50 bits TOTAL...........................................................................................149,442.50 bits Drop by the palace in the next 96 hours and pay up or not only will I seize your house, I will also throw you in the dungeon and torture you for the next year. Kindest Regards, Princess Celestia Princess Sunbitch, Twilight did what, she STOLE your silverware and you expect us to pay for it? Look, we are getting sick and tired of constantly being fined for that little bitch's failures, disasters and now acts of larceny. We don't get why the hell you are doing this anyway, it's not like you're hurting for money. Go ahead and pull this shit, we will expose you for all this unfair taxation and fining and the public will not stand for it! They will demand you abdicate and allow Luna to take over. Sick of Your Abuse of Power, Twilight Velvet and Night Light