The serene field of tall grass, rustling in the calm breeze had been torn to shreds by violent winds. After crossing this newly flattened earth, Princess Celestia and Carl had finally entered the heart of all negativity, the den of evil. The once black crystals now glowed in various shades and colours, as the air crackled with surges of magical energy.
Above them, they could see the origin point of the dark clouds, spread across the world. The destructive smog invading Equestria's air space was merely excess waste resulting from the sheer amount of magic being generated by the crystals.
“Welcome, Celestia!" A voiced called from atop the hill, perched on the central crystal. "How do you like my Altar of Darkness!?" In the blink of an eye, he appeared before them. Mephisto, in his new, crystal-winged form.
However, despite undergoing such a drastic transformation, Celestia still recognised the original vessel, buried underneath all his dark energy. “Unis…? Disgusting. Taking advantage of my Captain's insecurities just to steal his body.”
“I believe Twilight expressed similar sentiments, not that she's capable of criticising me anymore.”
“Where are Twilight and her friends? What have you done to them?” Celestia demanded.
“What are you blind? They’re right here!”
“Don’t play games with me!”
“Games!? This has been nothing but one big game since the day you imprisoned me! You’re just upset that I’m winning!”
“I found her.” Carl interrupted.
He pointed to the crystal on top of the hill. Upon closer inspection, just barely masked by the glowing light of the crystal was a pony’s silhouette. One with a distinctive horn, wings and mane.
“You’ve concealed them inside the crystals?” Celestia assumed.
“That’s right!” Mephisto laughed. “What? Did you think their lives were in danger? I promise I didn’t harm a hair on their pretty, little pony heads. How else was I supposed to leech off of their Magic of Friendship, for all eternity?”
“How sickening, but not unexpected.”
“Like I care! With the power of the Elements at my disposal, I’m untouchable! The very second some fool gets the idea in their head that if they just believe in ‘the power of friendship’, they can beat the bad guy, they’ll have already guaranteed their own demise!
I’m the one who controls what’s good and evil now! The mere thought of anything in Equestria trying to oppose me is laughable!”
“There’s still one…” Celestia replied, with utmost confidence.
“Pardon?”
“There is still one being in Equestria that can touch the untouchable. Our last line of defense, our chosen hero.”
“I already know who you’re talking about, but for my own amusement, please clarify: Who is this dashing hero you've chosen?”
Celestia turned her head and grinned. “Okay, Carl. You’re up.”
“Wait, what!?” He yelled in shock.
The Princess took a few paces back to give him some space, yelling words of encouragement at him, like he was the new kid on the sports team. “Knock ‘em dead, Carl!”
“Hold on, time-the-fuck-out! I’m fighting now!?”
“Obviously. Now, show him what you’re made of!”
“Really? That’s it!? No special power-up!? No sage advice!? Nothing!?”
“Of course not. You don’t need any advice. From this point on, it’s all you!”
“Are you fucking crazy!? I don’t have any special powers! He’s gonna slaughter me!”
“You’ll be fine.” She continued to nonchalantly ignore Carl’s cries for help.
“He’ll tear me so many new assholes my corpse will be shitting for weeks!”
“Carl!” She shouted. “You’ll be fine. Trust me.”
With nowhere left to run, Carl could only pray she was telling the truth, as he turned back to face the demon he was, somehow supposed to slay.
“What’s wrong, Carl?” Mephisto taunted. “Got nothing left to say? No final quips before I vaporise you?”
Carl stood firm and ready, he had no idea what was about to happen. Believing in Celestia was the last thing he had left.
“Bring it!”
Filled with glee and excitement, Mephisto quickly gathered his magic. A raging storm of lightning that converged into a chaotic ball of pure power atop his horn, growing to the size of a small building. He wanted to make sure Carl went out with a big bang.
“No holding back, this time! I’ll make sure that big mouth of yours stays silent, forever!”
Mephisto fired his amalgamation of pure violence, ripping through the ground, as it shook from the sheer magnitude of its strength, drawing ever closer to Carl, who could only brace himself, until it finally consumed him. In no time, the blast burst in a spectacular display of purple static and smoke.
Not even trying to contain his merriment, Mephisto immediately burst into joyous laughter. “Did you see that, Celestia!? After all your scheming and meticulous planning! After all that wasted time and energy, summoning a being from another world! After trying so hard to ensure your precious hero was kept safe and sound and I just go and blow him to pieces in one move! It’d be so sad if it wasn’t so funny!”
As the smoke began to clear, Mephisto’s laughter came to a sudden halt, as he noticed something that was there that shouldn’t be there. A feeling of sheer terror froze Mephisto in place, as he struggled to comprehend what was happening. Overcome by a feeling of utter despair he had never experienced before.
“What?”
The smoke cleared and standing in the ruined earth was Carl, plastered with a look of total bewilderment.
“What happened!?” Mephisto cried.
“Don’t yell at me, I don’t fucking know!” Carl angrily replied.
“Did I miss!? No... that can't be right! He was just standing still...! That was just a fluke! Yes, a fluke! Like, the wind or something! There’s no other logical explanation!”
"The wind? Whuh?"
Mephisto prepared another maelstrom of energy and hurled it at Carl, this time making sure it was a direct hit. Unfortunately, his hypothesis was proven wrong. Carl simply stood there, with the same blank expression on his face, as if nothing happened.
“I-I… don’t…. what…?” Mephisto’s mind was practically overclocking trying to understand the madness unfolding before him.
Carl, however felt a little insulted. “Hey, if you’re gonna kill me, could you stop screwing around and just do it, already? That shit stings.”
“Stings!? You should be a pile of ash!!”
“Man, are you, like, having an off day, or something?”
“SILENCE!”
Mephisto warped in front of Carl’s face, but Carl hardly flinched, not from fearlessness, but from sheer disinterest. He was far too focused on trying to understand what was happening.
“I’ll show you the true depths of my powers!” Mephisto boasted.
“Uhh… okay.”
The demon warped around Carl, leaving him surrounded with a whirlwind of afterimages, effortlessly teleporting from one spot to the next in a split second. “How’s this, Carl? You won’t be able to land a single blow against me!”
Carl simply stood there, bamboozled. He hadn’t even done anything yet and Mephisto was already trying to scare him by revealing his ‘true powers’, whatever that meant.
“What, exactly, are you trying to accomplish with this?” He asked out of concern for Mephisto's mental well being.
Suddenly, from among the myriad of shadows, Mephisto lunged forth and sucker punched Carl, square in the face, but what should have been a darkness infused, knockout blow, was met with little more than slight irritation.
“Are you retarded?” Carl asked, with Mephisto’s hoof still implanted in his face.
“What?”
“If you’re gonna fight me, then stop wasting my time and fight me!”
“What!?”
“Oh, for fuck’s… get off!”
Carl batted Mephisto’s hoof aside and out of sheer exasperation, headbutted him in the forehead, just below his horn.
Slightly dizzied from the sudden skull bashing, Mephisto hobbled backwards, shocked by the pain he was experiencing.
“My head is throbbing….? It hurts….? How…? I should be invincible…
Why….? Why? Why!? How can a lowly mud pony harm me!?”
Mephisto’s befuddled yelling was cut off by the sound of light-hearted giggling. The Princess was finding his whole ordeal quite amusing.
“What are you laughing at!?” Mephisto demanded. “What have you done!?”
“Oh my, not one for keeping calm under pressure, are you?” Celestia retorted, wiping away a tear. “But, to answer your question: I didn’t do anything, you’re the one who’s changed, Mephisto.”
“I changed? What does that have to do with anything!?”
“I knew from the very beginning that you would try to steal the powers of the Elements of Harmony, after all, they are the only magic in Equestria powerful enough to destroy you.
There was no chance you could allow such a power to exist in this world, but you also knew that you couldn’t destroy that power either, because just like your own negativity, the Magic of Friendship can also, never be destroyed.
Even if you eliminated the current wielders of the Elements, new ones would take their place. So, instead you did the next best thing. If you can’t destroy that power, then you had to take it as your own, so that no one would ever be able to use it against you ever again.”
“So, you figured out my plan through simple process of elimination, congratulations. But, that doesn’t explain this idiot! What did you do to him!?”
“Nothing."
"Nothing!? You lie!"
"I maybe notorious for withholding the truth, but I never lie. The Elements of Harmony are designed to destroy evil, but good and evil are not ideas that are set in stone, they are entirely subjective. The evil the Elements target is based solely on the morals of the ones wielding them, which is why only those who understand the Magic of Friendship are chosen to use them.
But, through the twisted mind of a demon, their powers can be used to erase the very magic they were supposed to protect. The very fact that you oppose everything in this world, made it impossible to find anyone from this world who could stand up to you. Regardless of their morals, your pure hatred for this world would grant the Elements the power to destroy anyone who opposed you.
That’s where Carl comes in. A being from a completely different world, who has no interest in the fate of Equestria. A rather unique individual with an even more ‘unique’ moral code. Carl has no stakes in this battle, he’s not protecting the weak, nor trying to save our world. His only real motive is that he simply wishes to return home.
As an outsider with his own self-serving goals combined with a miserable, rude and downright unpleasant attitude, he has become the only creature in this world that can, not only stand up to you, but defeat you. The perfect counter to your newfound powers.”
Mephisto adamantly stomped at the ground. “I refuse to accept this! Anyone who opposes me should be destroyed! NO EXCEPTIONS!”
“Unfortunately, no one can consciously decide what the Elements destroy. It is a subconscious choice, based on the morals you truly believe, deep in your heart. You can’t just change them on a whim.
Mephisto, you are the embodiment of negativity, evil incarnate. If he were not your enemy, you would have loved nothing more than to watch as Carl spread his own negativity throughout Equestria, how tragic that he chose to oppose you instead.
With no memories to exploit, you can’t control him. With no stakes in our battle and a complete disregard for the safety of Equestria and it’s people, he no longer fits your twisted definition of evil. He is a pony who fights not for friendship, but simply for himself.
And thanks to your own hubris, no matter how powerful the Elements make you, no matter how many giant energy blasts you conjure, or beams of destruction you cast, your efforts will always be rendered completely useless. All by one, simple, Earth pony.”
Mephisto’s world went black, paralysed by the revelation that he had been playing right into Celestia’s hooves, since the very beginning. Obtaining the powers of the Elements had been his ultimate goal since the day he first hatched his scheme a millennia ago. The fact that Celestia had already prepared a guaranteed way of countering this plan dealt a heavy blow to his ego.
Soon, however, the blackness that encompassed his vision turned a seething red, his anger boiling. He still refused to accept the truth, he couldn’t accept it. To do so, would devalue his efforts and admit that all the suffering he went through, biding his time in Tartarus was all for nothing. That he had been bested. Decisively defeated. And there was no way he would ever believe that, not even for a second.
“Celestia…. Celestia…. CELESTIA!!” His screams of rage echoed throughout the forest. “I won’t go down like this! Not after coming this far! Who cares about some mouth-breather from another world! You’re the one I’m exacting my revenge on! YOU’RE DEAD!!!”
Ignoring Carl completely, Mephisto fired a blast towards the Princess, but she quickly grabbed Carl with her magic to protect herself. His face absorbed the full brunt of the blast without leaving so much as a scratch.
“Do I look like some kind of meat shield to you!?” Carl criticised.
“You are no shield, Carl. You are my weapon! Now, let us slay this demon!”
“Has anyone ever told you that you’re, completely insane!?”
“You don’t rule over a kingdom for over a thousand years without hearing that at least once or twice.”
“Whatever works, I guess... as long as I get to beat the hell out of this guy, then you can be as crazy as you want.”
Carl was dropped back to the ground, as he proceeded to waltz over to Mephisto, with his usual smug grin.
“You really think you can beat me!?” Mephisto chided, still refusing to accept the truth. “I am light and darkness, good and evil! I have become an all-powerful go-!”
Mephisto was brutally interrupted by a solid punch to his snout, before he was knocked to the ground by a follow up strike, planting his face in the ground. Temporarily throwing him for a loop, he stammered and shook, before he finally picked himself back up.
“Why!? Why are you fighting for her!? You don’t even like this world! You hate it! Just like I do!”
“Because I made a promise!”
“What, to your little pony friends?”
“No, to you.”
“What? When!?”
“The day we first met. Right here, in this very clearing. I promised I’d beat the shit out of you and I’d hate to break a promise.”
Carl delivered another solid punch to Mephisto’s face, sending him flying towards the hill in the center of the crystals. He never really thought about it before, but crushing another pony’s face with his massive, rock solid hooves felt pretty satisfying, although it may have had something to do with Mephisto being the one on the receiving end.
“Get up, you slimy bastard! I’m not done taking my anger out on you!”
Mephisto was shaken, he felt cornered. He protected himself with a barrier, but Carl simply punched through it and continued to casually stroll towards him.
“Wait! Carl, remember! This isn’t my body!” He reasoned. “I’m still Unis! Any damage you do to me will be inflicted on him too! You’re not seriously going to put his life in danger, are you!?”
“I believe that’s what they call: Killing two birds with one stone.”
Another powerful punch put Mephisto’s back up against the wall at the foot of the hill.
“Not if I kill you first!” Mephisto fired a blast from his horn that would have vaporised any other creature, but Carl hardly flinched from it, to him it was no more painful than a mild sunburn, causing the supposed godlike entity to fallback on his cowardly routine.
“Why are you angry with me!? I’m not the one who brought you here against your will! It was Celestia! She ripped you from your world! She made you risk your life! She even imprisoned me when she should have destroyed me! She upset the balance! She’s the cause of all of this!
Join me and we can destroy her, together! We can destroy this whole wretched world! Equestria will be no more and you can return home with the satisfaction that you will never be called to this miserable place, ever again!”
Carl simply sighed in embarrassment. “God, you’re pathetic. I’m not doing this for Celestia, I’m doing it so I can sav-” Carl suddenly caught himself, he nearly said something deeply embarrassing. “Because you pissed me off.”
“What? That’s it!? You can’t be serious!?”
“Screaming like a tantruming toddler won’t save you.”
Mephisto suddenly darted into the air, soaring straight for the eye of darkness, where his excess clouds were still spawning. Gathering as much power from the crystals as he could possibly muster, he gave his final ultimatum.
“Celestia! Since the day I was imprisoned, I swore I’d get my revenge on you, no matter the cost! Who cares if I can’t defeat your worthless pawn! With the powers at my disposal, I’ll just wipe out the whole world! My storm of darkness has already spread to Ponyville, Canterlot and all of Equestria! I’ll incinerate it all in one final, glorious burst of worldwide extermination!”
“Carl!” Celestia ordered. “Quickly, point your hoof forward!”
“Oh no…” He grunted, already foreseeing where this was going.
Celestia froze him with magic and fired him towards Mephisto, like a rocket. Carl knew exactly what to do next. He rode the momentum of the launch and prepared his hoof for one, final blow.
Desperate to see his final act of vengeance through to the end, Mephisto attempted to stop Carl with a stray beam, but it was pointless, Carl was flying too fast, and hardly felt it to begin with, instead barging straight through it. The demon could only brace himself as Carl rocketed toward him, like a missile.
Carl flew into the storm of power surrounding Mephisto, splitting the clouds apart as he was tickled by the stray energy pulsing around him, until he finally collided with the monster, implanting his hoof deep into his gut. Time came to a complete standstill, as the searing, stomach churning pain reverberated throughout Mephisto's entire body. He completely lost control of his magic, the energy around them becoming volatile, as Mephisto’s powers collapsed around him.
As soon as time caught up, the raw energy expelled all its force, exploding in a shock wave that traveled throughout the entirety of Equestria, clearing the dark clouds that plagued the world, bringing back the clear blue sky.
The force of the blast sent Carl hurtling towards the earth. He wasn’t sure what to think of the spectacle he just took part in, too close to the fireworks to properly comprehend the scale of his own actions. The only thought rushing through his mind was: “She better fucking catch me.”
As he plummeted further to the ground, he grew anxious, but a split second before he crashed into the dirt, he suddenly froze in the air. He was safely in the grip of Celestia’s magic.
“Fucking hell, Celestia! Cutting it a little close, aren’t you!?”
She giggled to herself. “That was some excellent work, Carl.”
“Whatever… you do realise that guy isn’t dead, right?”
“I know… now then, I believe it’s time we rescued Twilight and her friends from their crystal prisons… and by we I mean you.”
“I don’t know… I’m kinda tired…”
“Mephisto is still in control of the Elements, so you’re the only one who can do it.”
“Fine…”
Celestia levitated Carl to the first crystal, shining in a pale yellow glow. He reached his hooves inside, as if he were reaching into a pool of water, grabbed hold of the pony and yanked them out. As he did, the crystal returned to its black, colourless dusk.
Fluttershy had been successfully rescued from Mephisto’s clutches, as she quickly woke from her slumber. “Carl! I knew you’d save us!” She wrapped her hooves around him for a hug, causing him to groan in embarrassment.
There was no time to chat as there were still five other ponies to rescue. One by one, Carl dragged the ponies out of their respective crystals, removing their stored powers along with them, until finally there was only one pony left.
Celestia guided Carl up the hill where the final crystal monolith stood. Glowing a deep purple, Carl reached in and pulled out the princess inside. Twilight soon regained consciousness as Celestia gently placed the two back on the ground.
“What…?” She mumbled, gathering her thoughts. “Carl? You saved us? You actually saved us? How?”
“It’s a long, convoluted story…”
“Princess Celestia? I’m so sorry! I had no idea we were playing right into Mephisto’s hands until it was too late!”
“It’s alright, Twilight.” Celestia assured. “In truth, it was inevitable that you’d be captured. That’s why I wanted Carl to be with you at all times, so he could save you when it happened, instead of needlessly risking your lives like you did. But, everything's okay, now. You did wonderfully."
"Thank you."
"You should have seen him, though. Carl's immunity to the warped Element’s powers drove Mephisto crazy, it was quite entertaining.”
“I had a sneaking suspicion you’d pull something like that. I guess being a jerk actually paid off for once in your life, Carl.” Twilight snarked.
“Oh yeah? Well, for your information, I wasn’t totally immune!” Carl argued.
“Yes. I noticed that strange anomaly, as well.” Celestia added. “Do you have an explanation for this, Carl?”
“N-no!”
The girls all laughed as Carl bashfully turned away. Their laughter was cut short however, once a body fell from the sky, crashing in front of them. The body just barely managed to pull itself up, after suffering from such humiliation and seething agony. The once godlike form they flaunted so proudly had reverted back to normal.
“Celestia… I’m not finished…”
“No, Mephisto, I’m afraid you are.”
“It’ll never be finished. Even if you destroy me now, I’ll be back! So long as there’s evil in this world, I’ll always come back! You’ll never be rid of me, my return is inevitable! It’s my destiny!”
“As long as the Magic of Friendship exists, the only thing you’re destined for, Mephisto, is a future of perpetual failure.”
Celestia’s words struck a nasty blow to the demon’s already fractured ego. The very idea that he could fail was beyond his comprehension, but as a being of pure negativity, admitting his own faults and accepting defeat was something he was completely incapable of and so, he pinned his failures on something else.
“Carl…. Carl…. CARL!! EVERYTHING’S YOUR FAULT!”
“Wow, he mad.” Carl laughed.
“I may have been stripped of my godhood, but that won’t stop me from dragging you back into the bowels of Tartarus with me! I’LL WIPE YOUR EXISTENCE FROM THIS WORLD! FROM ALL WORLDS!!!”
He turned to Carl and prepared an evil blast, but he couldn’t fire it. He felt paralysed all of a sudden.
“That’s as far as you go, Mephisto.” Ordered a voice in the demon’s head. “You’re not laying a hoof on that commoner, nor anyone ever again.”
Mephisto struggled with his vessel. Losing control of himself. “No! Go back to sleep! STOP!”
It was too late, the vessel was regaining control and soon, Mephisto was exorcised from his host. However, before the demonic mist could make it’s escape, Celestia surrounded the hill in a barrier. This time, Mephisto was the one who was trapped.
The mist materialised into a vague, distorted, winged, bipedal form, completely exposed and vulnerable.
“Twilight, you know what do next, right?” Celestia asked.
“Of course. Ready girls!?”
Twilight and her friends gathered the magic of the Elements of Harmony, as they prepared for one final shot. Mephisto flew up high, desperately trying to penetrate through the barrier, only to fail, repeatedly. There was no hope of escape for him.
He was completely boxed in, helpless to do anything to stop the inevitable, but he refused to go down, not without taking someone with him. His anger exploded into an otherworldly roar, as he made a mad dash for Celestia, utterly determined to exact his vengeance upon her, but it was too late. All she had to do was simply position herself behind her subjects, as they finished their preparations.
From a flash of blinding light, a rainbow burst forth, engulfing Mephisto, who was completely incapable of defending himself from the spectrum of light. Consumed by the positive powers of friendship, his spirit quickly broke apart as his darkness began dissipating.
In a futile act of defiance, he reached out his demonic claw and cursed Celestia’s name, before his evil was cleansed from the world, for good.
The incessant laughter, childish outbursts of rage and arrogant screaming came to an end. There was only silence. A peaceful intermission as the heroes basked in their victory.
“Thank fuck that’s over…” Carl sighed.
“Indeed.” Unis added. “And may we never have to play victim to his powers ever again.”
“I’m surprised you’re still standing after the beating I just handed you.”
“As if I could be kept down by a mere commoner, like you.” Unis grinned.
“Cocky bastard…”
"Hey!" Applejack called. "Look at what I found, just lying over here, all dejected!"
"The Scared Shield?" Celestia answered. "Yes. I Imagined Mephisto would steal this, nice to finally have it back."
"Yeah..." Carl nudged Unis. "Mephisto stole it... right?"
Unis swallowed his pride and prepared himself, as he walked over to Celestia and knelt before her. “Princess, I must apologise for my insubordination. I was the one who stole the Sacred Shield."
Celestia was shocked, she was convinced Mephisto had stolen it and couldn't fathom why Unis would do such a thing. Carl however was simply amazed Unis was actually owning up to it, he was even willing to cover for him, considering everything that had happened.
"I wanted to use it to defeat Mephisto." Unis explained. "But, I got caught up in my own delusions. I went against your orders and did as I pleased. It was because of my negligence that Princess Twilight and her friends were captured and so, I take full responsibility.”
Celestia simply sighed. “Oh, Unis… you’re too hard on yourself. You have always been a loyal commandeer of my Royal Guard, you don't need to go to such lengths just to prove yourself. Besides, in the end, you resisted Mephisto’s powers and expelled him from your mind. You have nothing to be ashamed of… but if you insist on being punished, then I hereby order you..." Celestia's horn glowed as Unis prepared for the worst, but the gentle warmth of her magic, instead slowly healed his wounds. "...to relax and unwind, just a little.”
He looked up at the Princess, with the most sincere look of gratitude in his eyes. “Thank you… Princess.”
“So… now what?” Carl asked.
“Ooh! I know!” Pinkie jumped in. “How about a party!?”
Before the group knew it, they were back in Twilight’s throne room, celebrating their victory over the most powerful foe they've faced yet. There were streamers, balloons, cake, music and cookies and punch by the door.
However, while the others relieved their stress through dancing and games, Carl returned to his position outside, sitting atop the steps of the castle, looking over the, once again peaceful town of Ponyville, as the setting Sun bathed the area in a bittersweet orange hue.
“I thought you’d be out here.” Twilight announced as she and Pinkie exited the castle.
“Why aren’t you partying with everypony else?” Pinkie asked.
“Nah, never really liked parties.” He answered. “I was always the guy standing in the corner, who just wanted to go home.”
“Oh… well, I brought you some cake.”
“No thanks…”
“But, it’s cheesecake.”
“What? Why didn’t you say so!?” Carl immediately grabbed the plate and learning from his previous endeavour, ate directly off it, with his giant horse mouth. “Oh man, finally! Thanks, Pinkie.”
She smiled as she hopped back inside, leaving him alone with Twilight, who sat beside him.
“What the hell are you doing here?” He asked, still with cake in his mouth.
“Taking one last look at Ponyville before you leave, are you?”
He promptly swallowed. “No… I can’t wait to get out of this backwards dirt town.”
“I still can’t believe, after everything that happened, that crummy attitude of yours was what saved Equestria. Kinda makes me wonder about the whole Magic of Friendship thing. Just when I think I finally understand it, someone like you shows up and completely flips the idea on its head.”
"Sometimes, you need some uncaring jackass to step in, to bring some sanity into an insane world."
"Or bring insanity to a sane one. Well, whatever the case, I'm glad you cared just enough to fight on our side, to the very end."
“I don't know, I didn't really do anything. Like I said in the beginning, I was just a tool your princess needed to solve a problem. Celestia’s the one who really saved the world, with her batshit scheming.”
“Well, you are the biggest tool I know.”
“Exactly… Hey!”
Twilight couldn’t help but laugh at his response.
“Speaking of tools, what’s happening with Unis?”
“He’s taking a demotion, says he wants to work closer with the commoners, so he can get to know them better.”
“Damn, if I made fun of him now, I’d seem like a real asshole…”
“Yeah… imagine that...”
There was a brief lull as the two simply watched over the town.
“So, Twilight. Still think I’m an arrogant, thick-headed, hypocrite?”
“Totally.” She laughed, again, much to his chagrin. “What about me? You still think I’m an entitled, elitist, rich kid?”
“You’re!” Carl stopped himself, he was mad, but not enough to actually get genuinely upset. “You’re… okay, I guess…”
“Okay? Like, okay enough to be... friends?”
“Shut up.” Carl got up and headed back inside.
“Oh come on, Carl. Don’t be embarrassed, just admit it.” She quickly followed after him.
“I said, shut up, Twinkle Snow.”
Later that evening, the ponies gathered in the library, as they gave Carl their final farewells, before seeing him off.
"You're keeping the scarf, right?" Pinkie asked.
"Yes." He replied.
"And the bandage?" Fluttershy insisted.
"I really don't think I need to-" He stopped as he saw Fluttershy's face growing more concerned. "Yes, I'm keeping the old rag."
She smiled.
Carl stepped forward, as Princess Celestia gave her final thanks. “Carl, despite everything I subjected you to, you still showed the courage and resolve I would have expected from any of Equestria’s greatest heroes and for that I thank you and… I apologise that you were forced into all this trouble against your will.”
“Whatever.” He bluntly replied. “Shit happens.”
She chuckled to herself, before focusing her magic. A bright light pierced through the space beside her, expanding into a large portal.
It was finally time. The gateway to his world awaited him. He stepped forward, ready to return home.
“Carl, wait!” Twilight called. “I know the Princess said it already, but I need to say it too.
Thank you.”
“Getting sappy on me at the last second?”
"I might not get another chance to..."
"Well, this is it. If you've got any final parting words, now's the time."
“Well... I do have one more thing I’d like to say....”
“What is it?”
Twilight took a deep breath and readied herself. “You’re still an asshole.”
Carl couldn't help himself, he just laughed. “And don’t you forget it!”
Taking that final insult, Carl turned back to the portal where he proceeded to take his leave. He stretched his hoof out, confusing the other ponies as to what he was trying to do, but as he moved further through the portal, his silhouette morphed from a little pony, to a tall, bipedal creature. His hoof changed into a hand with it’s thumb up, as he continued walking into the ether, until he vanished completely.
The lost soul finally returned home.