//------------------------------// // Vacation // Story: Returning Survivor // by Itchy //------------------------------// Mecha was in Canterlot, on vacation. Granted, that vacation was mandated by Luna after she found out that he was once again injured. It also didn't help his case when shortly after being released from the hospital he went just a little bit crazy. Only a little bit. Okay, attacking a tree while calling it a “Vile creature that Hell would spit out,” was probably a bit much. Anyways, it wasn't a pure vacation. Mecha had brought with him the ceremonial armor and sword he made, realizing that a solid gold set of armor with a silver sword was probably a bit much in Ponyville. Canterlot on the other hand, ate that stuff up. Furthermore, he could jack up the price and the nobles wouldn't know the difference! Heck, they'd probably want the set even more! At this point, Mecha broke out into maniacal laughter, causing the royal guards escorting him to the palace to step away from him. Glancing at their behavior, Mecha suddenly realized what he did, and sighed. Maybe he did need this vacation after all. Walking in silence for a few more minutes, they approached the palace, where both princesses were waiting for them. The guards quickly bowed, while Mecha just looked at them both. The guards were about to tell him to bow, when he suddenly spoke up and said, “How's it going?” Stunned at the blatant disrespect to the princesses, the guard were moving to punish Mecha, when princess Celestia said, “It is going well. Twilight Sparkle told me about the recent events in Ponyville, and I must say, you are quite the brave pony.” Shrugging his shoulders, Mecha replied, “Don't worry about, I just did what needed to be done. And don't sell Big Macintosh short either, he helped too!” Smiling, Celestia said, “Yes, yes he did. I've also heard of some more... interesting things as well. Should I tell the guards to protect the trees while you're here.” Blushing profusely, Mecha coughed a little, muttering, “One time, one tree. And I didn't even hurt it too much.” Chuckling at his embarrassment, Celestia walked off, saying, “Enjoy your stay here!” Sighing, Mecha turned to princess Luna, and said, “So, shall we walk?” Smiling at her friend, Luna said, “I think thou hast a good idea. Were shalt we go?” Turning towards the market district, Mecha said, “I've got something set up in the market district for later, why don't we see if it's ready?” Nodding her head, Luna replied with, “That sounds like a grand idea.” LINEBREAKER There was a crowd gathered by a stand in the market, causing a grin on Mecha's face. “It appears,” he started, “that not only is it set up, but it is also is quite popular.” Hearing his statement, a pony from the crowd turned to face him, and asked, “Is that fine set of armor yours?” Grinning even wider, Mecha replied, “Yes, it is. Forged it myself, and it came out marvelously, don't you think?” Having used her greater height to see the armor in question, Luna replied, “Most definitely. That armor in fact reminds me of the old ceremonial armor that Celestia and I used to wear.” Hearing the princess praise the armor caused the crowd to murmur amongst itself. After all, if the princess praised it, then it must be top quality! Furthermore, it was similar to something both of them used to wear, making the history buffs in the crowd freak out. “I must ask,” the pony from before started, “how much is it for the set! I just must have it!” Chuckling, Mecha told the pony, “It goes up for auction today at four. I want to make sure that everypony has a chance to own it, and should it go high enough, I might consider making another set in silver and copper.” Having seen what they came to see, the princess and the forger walked off to get lunch. LINEBREAKER “I have heard only the highest of praises for this establishment,” Luna told Mecha. “The food ist said to be divine, the decoration classy.” “It sounds great,” Mecha said, following her lead. “What's the place called?” “I believe that the establishment ist called A Salt & Battery*,” Luna replied. Mecha stopped short, asking, “Did you say A Salt & Battery?” Blinking at his sudden change in demeanor, Luna asked, “That I did. Why, does thou have a problem with the establishment?” Shaking his head, Mecha said, “It's not that I have a problem with it, rather, it has a problem with me. Or, to be clearer, the owner does.” Quirking her head, Luna asked, “Thou must explain what thou means.” Sighing, Mecha told her, “I may have assaulted and battered the owner at some point.” Seeing the look on Luna's face, he quickly said, “He started it! All I did was complain that almost all nobles seem to be stuck up jerks with no personalty and use! He was the one who got offended and swung at me! Either way, after I kicked his flank, he told me I was banned from his restaurant.” Mecha blinked, and then said, “I just realized something.” Curious, Luna asked, “And what ist that?” “I got banned from A Salt & Battery for assault and battery,” Mecha said, still dumbfounded at the circumstances. LINEBREAKER After trying four more restaurants that Mecha was banned from, they finally decided to try the place Spike had recommended to Mecha before he left: Doughnut Joe's. “I still cannot believe thou ist banned from so many eating establishments,” Luna told Mecha. “It is almost as if thou ist trying to get banned from all of the eating establishments in Canterlot!” “Not all of them,” Mecha replied. “Just the ones owned by nobles or classy enough to take mares to for dates.” Blinking, Luna replied, “Thou realizes that thou just listed every establishment besides this one, right?” Mecha quirked his head, and replied, “Yeah, that sounds about right.” Laughing, Luna asked Mecha, “I must admit, I am curious as to where thou managed obtain the material for the armor in the square? The gold appeared to be pure, the silver unblemished.” Mecha looked at her, and asked, “Do you want the official story, or the truth?” Luna thought for a moment, and then said, “I think I would like to hear both.” Smiling, Mecha chuckled to himself, saying, “The truth is that it's from an abandoned dragon hoard, but don't spread that around, as I don't want everypony and their dog pestering me for it's location.” Eyebrows raising, Luna said, “An abandoned dragon hoard! Thou must realize that thou ist playing a dangerous game there.” Chuckling, Mecha replied, “Which is why the official story is that it's from tax returns.” Blinking, Luna said, “Tax returns?” Smiling, Mecha replied, “Tax returns.” Luna just stared at him, processing what he said in her head. After several minutes of silence, she finally broke down in laughter, saying, “Tax returns!” LINEBREAKER Mecha and Luna were back in the market district, waiting to see how the auction went. However, when the auctioneer got there, he walked up to Mecha instead of up to the podium. “I need to ask a couple questions before we start,” he told Mecha. “Go ahead,” Mecha responded. “First,” the auctioneer started, “This is purely ceremonial, correct?” “Eeyup,” Mecha responded. “Armor is made out of some of the purest gold I could find, and the same of the swords silver. Heck, a foal could bend them!” Nodding his head, the auctioneer then asked, “And I've heard rumors of a silver and copper set. Would you be willing to explain that to me?” Sighing Mecha said, “I'm undecided on that front. Currently, no such set exists. However, should this set sell for enough, I might decide to make said sets. Granted, that is not a guarantee, however, should I receive an order for custom armor via my store, I'll make it. Just not out of gold, as it was hard to obtain the material for this set.” “Oh really?” the auctioneer asked. “That might help sell it.” Sighing, Mecha said, “The official story is that it's tax returns from an abandoned dragon's hoard.” “Official story?” inquired the auctioneer. “Yes, and I'm sticking to it,” Mecha said, putting his hoof down. “Very well,” the auctioneer replied, walking up to the stand. “I thought the official story was just tax returns?” Luna asked. “Dragon hoard gold adds value,” was Mecha's response, watching the bidding going on. “500 bits!” hollered one pony. “700 bits!” shouted another. “1000 bits!” “1200 bits!” “2400 bits!” “5000 bits!” “10,000 bits!” the auction raged, as more and more of the richer ponies tried to out bid each other. Mecha smiled, the value having exceeded the value of the gold already**. After another minute of bidding, the last bid was cast, and the auctioneer yelled, “SOLD! To the gentlecolt in the hood, for 15,500 bits!” Mecha was truly happy, for that alone just paid for the materials he'd need to train Snips and Snails. Furthermore, there would be plenty left over for his next project. He was curious at the grin that Luna was giving to the purchaser of the armor, and inquired, “Do you know him?” Shaking her head, Luna told Mecha, “Only that he ist the one Celestia hired to buy decorations for the palace.” Elated at that bit of news, Mecha and Luna started walking back towards the palace. LINEBREAKER Luna and Mecha were standing at the gates to the palace, exchanging farewells. “It has been a most enjoyable day,” princess Luna told him. “I look forward to the next time we meet.” “It was indeed enjoyable,” Mecha said, “And the next time will most likely be at the Gala. So, until then, farewell!” And with a final wave, Mecha turned to leave, only to walk straight into Celestia. Granted, Mecha didn't know that, seeing as he hadn't stepped back yet. He did have his suspicions, and said, “I've walked right into princess Celestia, haven't I?” The guards on duty merely stared, one replying, “Yep.” “Gluttony's buffet!” Mecha cursed. Chuckling to herself, Celestia stepped back so that Mecha could actually see, and asked, “Should I be offended by that?” “Do you know what it means?” Mecha asked. “No,” Celestia replied. “Then no,” Mecha said back. “However, I wouldn't recommend saying it if you ever visit Hell.” Laughing, Celestia said, “I'll keep that in mind. So where are you off to at this time of night?” Thinking for a moment, Mecha said, “Probably walk around town until my ride back home shows up. Why?” Smiling, Celestia said, “My sister talks about how much she enjoyed her walk with you, not to mention the look on her face when she got back made it clear that she enjoyed this one as well, so I was thinking that I might have fun walking with you as well.” Blinking, Mecha asked, “Don't you need to sleep though?” Celestia chuckled, saying, “While it is true that I sleep most nights, it is not actually a necessity. I just enjoy a good nights sleep, as it is quite relaxing.” Shrugging his shoulders, Mecha merely nodded his head, walking back into town, this time with Celestia keeping him company. LINEBREAKER Mecha was standing at the train station, saying goodbye to the princesses. “Thanks for the vacation you two,” he said, watching the station workers carry his luggage onto the train. “I may not have wanted it at first, but I definitely needed it, and I did enjoy myself.” Smiling, Celestia said, “It was fun to have you around. I haven't seen the guards that tense sense Luna and I had our last prank war.” Chuckling, Luna said, “I merely wish thou could stay longer.” Smiling, Mecha said, “Yeah, well, the shop won't run itself, and I don't trust Snips and Snails to run it for more than a couple days.” Giving a final round of farewells, Mecha got onto the train, preparing himself for the day long trip. LINEBREAKER Mecha was back in Ponyville, walking home when he caught sight of somepony familiar walking out of the spa. Laughing to himself, he hollered out, “Hey Zecora!” before walking by, surprised that he ran into a family friend on his way back from vacation. *I hold no affiliation with the real restaurant A Salt & Battery. I just figured it would work for this scene. **Using my best estimates on the amount of material in the armor, this value would be approximately 6000 bits.