//------------------------------//
// A Princess' Departure 
// Story: Those Left Behind 
// by the7Saviors 
//------------------------------//

Things were bad... very bad.

I thought things were as bad as they were going to get.

I lost my family, my friends, my home... my son.

And now we had finally found Celestia, only to find out that the monster had done something to her... something permanent. We tried again and again to fix the Princess' eyesight. 

I tried every single spell I thought would help, and even some I had only read about. Even Cadence couldn't do anything, and she had a lot more knowledge when it came to medical spells than I did.

Nothing worked.

She was just... blind now. 

What tore me up about it was that she was completely okay with being crippled for the rest of... well... forever. The first few times Cadence and I had tried to help her, she screamed, and cried, and begged us to stop -- to just let her be... to leave her alone.

I couldn't bring myself to try anymore.

I hadn't accepted what had happened to her, but watching her in that state... listening to her beg me not to restore her eyesight...

What could I do?

She was genuinely happy to have lost her vision, and... was it right to take that small bit of happiness away from her? She had a point after all -- there wasn't much left to see but endless wastes and the ashes of her dead subjects scattered about the land.

Maybe she was right, maybe she was wrong, but the one thing I did know for sure, was that trying to help her was only causing her more pain, and I couldn't do that to her.

So I let it be.

Cadence didn't agree with my decision, nor did Luna.

Cadence was quick to point out that when -- not if -- when we finally defeated that demon, we could travel to another land -- one untouched by the demon's all encompassing balefire. She tried to reason with her broken Aunt that if we were to find such a place, she'd want to see it with her own eyes.

She'd want to watch as we found that new untainted land where there were still ponies alive and well -- watch as we somehow rebuilt Equestria from the ground up.

She didn't outright say anything, but I could tell Luna thought that was wishful thinking. I thought the same, but I had hoped it would convince Celestia to at least consider trying to regain her sight again.

I wasn't surprised when it didn't.

Still, Cadence didn't give up.

She had stopped trying to force a cure and instead settled for an endless stream of encouraging and inspiring words that even I found rather annoying after awhile.

Luna on the other hoof, tried time and again to remind my previous mentor of her responsibilities as a Princess. She mentioned that if there was even one subject left, it was her duty to step up as a ruler and lead, and she couldn't do that properly if she was blind.

Celestia of course, didn't listen.

I had already given up on convincing the Princess.

Sure, I had made a few attempts here and there, but nothing came of it. We had tried to ask her what happened and where she had been only once more, but once had been enough. The one time we tried, she went into a series of violent shakes, nigh incoherent mutters of 'it's true, it's all true' and 'they're all I have left' among other things.

Then came the screaming.

Not even Luna had the heart to ask her again after that.  

I don't know why I gave up on Celestia so easily compared to the other two. Normally I'd be right there by her side, doing what Cadence was trying and failing to do with even more zeal.

Maybe seeing what was once my personal pillar of hope, strength, and wisdom broken down so easily fractured something between Celestia and I. Maybe it was just that I was sick and tired of trying.

Maybe it was the constant emotional drain that seemed to be plaguing me lately. I don't know... my feelings about Celestia were rather... complicated at the moment.

So if I wasn't trying to help convince Celestia not to give up hope when she very clearly already had, then what was I doing?

I was focusing on completing the next part of my mental checklist.

As... strange as Cadence had been acting, and as crippled as Celestia was -- both physically and spiritually -- we still managed to reunite. That meant I could focus on finding a place to hide and bide our time until Luna's power returned.

I'd worry about what to do with Celestia when we found someplace safe.

The problem I was desperately trying to ignore, was that we didn't know where this thing would appear -- it seemed to be able to warp around to any location on a whim and somehow always knew where we were at any given time.

Eventually I acquiesced to Luna's suggestion to just keep moving and keeping track of each other. It was unanimously agreed upon that Equestria was... a lost cause. Even before I had originally woke up, both Luna and Celestia had already searched most of the land and found the same absolute destruction everywhere they went.

With the help of Cadence and I, we had searched the remaining portions of Equestria and had found nothing. Nothing but dry land, withered trees, destroyed structures, and ash. 

The only real consolations we had were that our eyes -- save for Celestia's -- seemed to finally be adjusting to the constant darkness, and that we discovered we could fly again without that thing breathing down our necks.

Both these developments went a long way in helping us navigate quickly as we made our way out of Equestria and into the lands beyond. We each took turns supporting Celestia as we traveled, making sure the broken Princess didn't wander off the path we were on.

It was especially difficult during flight.

Regardless we made it work somehow, and at Cadence's suggestion we made our way north to see what remained of the Crystal Empire. As we flew across the wasteland of Equestria, I honestly thought Luna would call me out for not just Teleporting us all there, but it was actually Celestia who brought it up.

"Twilight."

I turned to the Solar Princess with a questioning look before remembering that she couldn't see me.

"Yes, Princess?" I asked instead.

"It will take us quite some time to get to the Frozen Wastes of the north," Celestia noted, "I'm not sure they're all that frozen anymore, but wouldn't it be faster to simply Teleport us all there?"

"I'm not Teleporting for the same reason I couldn't Teleport Luna, Cadence, and myself to the Canterhorn Crater before," I replied readily, "I don't know what changes -- if any -- have been made to the landscape."

We had all just decided to refer to what was once our home as the Canterhorn Crater for... obvious reasons. I wasn't happy about the decision and personally didn't really see the point in naming it. Still, if it gave the rest of them some kind of peace of mind, then I wouldn't object.

"That makes sense," Celestia replied, nodding in my direction, "but have you considered just Teleporting across the space above the Crystal Empire? There are no skybound obstacles between here and there, and I'm fairly sure you can gauge the distance well enough not to under or overshoot it."

A strange thing happened to me then.

After she had said those words, I experienced a momentary bout of... giddiness. It only lasted a second or so, and I didn't realize what it was until it had happened, but it confused me... and when I figured out why I had felt that way a moment later, it disturbed me.

The reason I refused to Teleport was, once again, because of the dangerously alluring power of ambient Magic. This time I remembered what it felt like to use it, and it made me shudder just thinking about it.

Despite what I believed were earnest efforts to separate myself from it, deep down  it seems I had been looking for an excuse to use ambient Magic again, and Celestia's observation had given me just such an excuse.

I hadn't said anything about it to the others, because I was afraid of what they would've thought of me for falling under the influence of the unfiltered Magic so easily, but what Celestia had just said, and my strange reaction convinced me I had to say something.

"About that," I began hesitantly, "I... don't really think it's a good idea, Princess -- for a couple of reasons actually..."

Luna glanced in my direction, but didn't say anything.

"Very well, Twilight," Celestia replied, turning away from me and facing forward once more, "if you feel it's too much, you need not force yourself."

Whatever else I was going to say died in my throat and a slight chill ran down my spine.

It was more or less the same thing Luna had said to me back in the ruined city when she had asked me to use ambient Magic to fight the monster and I refused. Not only that, but she had said it in that same exact dismissive tone as Luna.

And it had the same exact effect on me.