//------------------------------//
// chapter 16: the trash man 
// Story: Bamboozled again! 
// by Theboxcatgamr 
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Ok so basically as we fell Clyde was a fast thinker and made a shadow portal-thing below us so we wouldn't die on impact. We landed in the forest near the wank-shack (Abel's nickname for my shed), I decided to check the others for injuries: Clyde and scootaloo were fine and I had a red mark on my back from when the basterd shoved me but I'd live and Théodore...
Well as it turns out, the fresh spring air of the junkyard brings out a new side of Théodore.

"I just... What? What am I looking at? Is that a person? Yep that's a person... HOLY CRAP HE IS NOW A PERSON"

in the ol'one two what'cha gonna do switcheroo Théodore was human, and I was confused. Yep during his time on earth Théodore was completely 80% bonafide human. He opened his eyes to me,Clyde and scootaloo looking at him in shock.

"why are you staring at me?"

"Well...uh, I really don't know how to deal with this situation."

He looked down and stumbled back.

The scream he let out was so high pitched that we couldn't hear it... But a dog shelter about thirty miles away went absolutely ballistic. I grabbed him by the shoulders and told him to snap out of it.  After a bit of time spent on calming down Théodore, Me and Clyde then had to teach him how to walk FUN.

We approached the wank shack (or as some people call it. "The nut shack") and I opened the crappy wood door:

"Welcome to my humble abode that has been dubbed oh so long ago: the wank shack"

Clyde giggled and scootaloo was looking around for anything notable.

"what's this?"

"Oh that's the..." I stopped when I saw the S-T-V magnet sitting on my shelf just like the day I went to shoot cube.

"EVERYONE OUT OF THE NUT SHACK!"

"but I thought it was called-"

"JUST GET OUT OF MA SHED!"

I pushed everyone out of the shack and apparently just in time because right then and there I saw myself approaching the shoddy shed (I myself don't even know what it's going to be called in an hour or two.)  My doppelgänger placed a leaky green cube on the shelf and fell asleep in the bed.

"We aren't safe here. We need to get to Able's junkyard"

Clyde nodded but was looking rather...unstable

"Clyde hold up"

"yeah?"

"Dude you look like you are literally going to fall apart."

If the laws of physics allowed it, Clyde's arm would fall off comically Clyde sighed and said something I feared. Clyde would be dead by daylight.

"What!? Why?"

"without the presence of mana my form is growing unstable"

"Hold up. The only reason you are going to die soon. Is literally because magic."

Clyde nodded slowly

"What do?"

" I need to take on a form that could live without magic for a while. Basically what I'm trying to say is I need a bit of your body"  Clyde said with an awkward smile 

"I fucking knew you wanted me for my body"

"what was that?"

"Nothing. Ok so what's the catch?"

Clyde said I would basically be used as a sort of basic model for it. I needed to basically just lie down and roll around in the dirt a bit. Ok a bit weird but eh.  He then took out some sort of book and drew arrows between the pit I was rolling around in and the pit he would roll around in.  The arrows started glowing and Clyde said to keep rolling. After ten minutes I started feeling lightheaded and Clyde said to stop. I climbed out of the pit and looked at Clyde. We looked like we could be related. 

"Damm" 

He looked less like a shadow and more like the the palest Irishman that the world has ever seen. 
He told me that I wouldn't really be affected. I now have a hand that looks like it was covered in tar and dragged through a gunpowder factory. As a plus I can now take the ol' razzle dazzle to souring new heights.

"Can I make shadow portals?"

"no"

"DAMMIT!"

Well gala suit. You had your fun but unfortunately I don't think rolling around in the dirt and then getting magically altered isn't going to come out in the washer.  We carried on and eventually we reached the junkyard. 

"Ok so how should we do this?"

"I am going in"

"What?"

"I think it's high time I meet my real father...what? Did you not expect me to put the pieces together?

I said nothing as he walked over to the door of the trailer and knocked hesitantly. The door opened and out steeped Abel

"...dad?"

Abel went wide eyed and pulled Théodore into a hug. Ok I guess he needs no explanations. Just hugs.

Scootaloo was nearly in tears and it took me this long to put the picture together.

Yep 

Her parents are probably pretty dead.

I gave her a hug and she looked at me in shock. Then went back to tears but this time it was less sad.

She had been bamboozled again