A Thief's Tale: The Path To Penance

by Ringtael

Chapter Thirteen: Learning About The Thing

Bruh. Fluttershy? Fluttershy is easily the sweetest thing on two legs, and it showed the morning after Max finally lead me out of the Everfree. After spending a decently comfortable night on her couch, the adorable Mare made me a breakfast of fried potatoes and collard greens that were out of this world with a little salt, and I made sure that Fluttershy knew about how grateful I was by giving her usual cookware nonstick qualities via runes that weren’t hard to make. She in turn told me all about how she usually burned her omelettes and laid a lot of parise on me for doing that one little thing, though I tried to give her as many compliments as she was giving me, just about different stuff.

After breakfast, Fluttershy asked if I was doing anything for the day and I told her that I didn’t have any plans and offered to help her with the animals to the best of my abilities. Things did not go according to plan, and I got bitten by multiple squirrels, a bat, and a ferret. The ferret hurt the most, so I resisted the temptation to punt the damn thing and just picked it up and took it to Fluttershy for a proper chiding. She gave it steadily in firm tones before sending the little thing off to go bug someone else for a bit, and Fluttershy thanked me for being gentle with a creature that hurt me.

Post feeding frenzy, Flutters asked, “Jay? Is there anything you want to do today?”

I shrugged casually and leaned against her cottage. ‘If I say you, am I in trouble?’ “I’m down for whatever, bein’ straight with you.”

Fluttershy gave me a little smile and hid most of her face behind her hair, blushing lightly. “W-Well… W-Would you like to g-go for another walk? I-I want to introduce you to a-a friend of mine.”

I nodded. “Sounds good to me. If they’re a friend of yours, then I wouldn’t mind. Gotta ask what their name is, though.”

“Z-Zecora… Do- Do you kn-know her from Arkaid?”

I shook my head. “No clue. I never really met many people outside of your circle of friends to be honest with you. I was dating Arkaid’s Twilight at the same time I was dating Arkaid’s Fluttershy, and she pretty much put the kibosh on me getting too close to people.”

“... Twilight made you not make friends?” Flutters asked doubtfully.

I nodded somberly. “She was obsessed with me in a lot of bad ways. She wanted my brother dead. Got her wish.” I sighed and shook my head, still not really believing it.

“O-Oh…”

“Didn’t mean to bring bad news up for no reason. Why don’t we go to your friend’s place so I can say hi?”

“O-Okay…” She said softly. “... Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.” I answered quietly.

“... O-Okay…”

I gave her a little smile. “Can I ask for a hug, or is that a-”

Fluttershy glomped me in the blink of an eye. “Do not worry, young Thrall. I will guard thine life with mine fullest abilities.” Her voice was deeper and far more solid, her embrace definitely felt different.

I was probable talking to her alternate instead of the woman herself. “... Shade Rose?”

She let me go and cupped my face, her eyes a deep, dark blue. “She I am. I would claim you as mine, Jameson. It is within my rights.”

“... Not sure I like the idea of being ‘claimed’ when you say it like that.” I replied slowly trying to distance myself from her.

She let me go without a problem, but maintained the intimate distancing. “You misunderstand, Jameson. I want you as my Thrall. I wish for you to be in my Coven, and it is all but done in many aspects. Whether you wish to be mine or not, you already are. All I desire is for you to be protected, as you now carry a piece of myself within you.”

“Ah. Thanks, but-”

She placed a finger on my lips. “Give it time.” Shade Rose closed her eyes and opened them to reveal the Fluttershy I knew and was falling for.

Flutters jerked her hand back and scuttled the ship, backing away from me rather quickly. “I-I-I- Um… Jay, I-I… Th-That’s n-n-never ha-happened before!”

I raised my hands and made a placating gesture. “The Alternates tend to show their faces when they want to, Flutters. I know that much. I’m pretty sure you don’t have much control over when Shade Rose takes over.”

“I-I’ve only ever even heard her say anything a few times!” She started hyperventilating and clutched her ears, looking at the floor. “How can she just do that!?”

It seemed like the best of times to calm her down with some physical affection, so I wrapped her up with my arms. “Fluttershy, I need you to take a few deep breaths. Shade Rose isn’t someone you need to be afraid of; she’s a part of you, Buttershy. She isn’t going to hurt you.”

“B-B-But w-what does she want!?” Fluttershy asked. “I-I-I don’t want to build a C-C-Coven!”

I held her a little tighter. “Fluttershy, we can figure that out when you breathe, okay?  Take a deep breath and hold it in, aight? You’re okay, Babygirl, you’re okay.”

She hugged me back and did as I asked, shakily taking her breaths while her face was pressed against the join between my shoulder and neck. “... It’s h-h-hard Jay…”

I slipped my arms under her wings so I could rub her back. “I know, Flutters, and I’m here for you, okay? Just focus on me and we’ll get through this together, and when we do, we’re going out, gettin’ out of the house, and we’re going to figure this out. Are you with me, Buttershy?”

She took a few more shaky breaths and asked, “Jay?”

“Yes, Fluttershy?”

I wasn’t expecting the kiss, but I was expecting it to be a good one once it started. I kept one hand on her lower back and raised the other to the space between her wings. Fluttershy leaned into me, her breasts pressing against my chest in a way that somehow didn’t make me feel aroused; just closer to her than I was before, and that made me feel good inside. I couldn’t blame Vampire venom for the bliss in this kiss, because the bliss wasn’t there; it was all patience and comfort, compassion and warmth. Where kissing Arkaid’s Fluttershy had me ready to ‘snuggle’ in seconds, I just wanted to… I guess I don’t really know. I think I wanted Fluttershy to know that I would happily stay with her through whatever pops up in her path, and I’m sure that my point got across. However, I wasn’t quite sure why Fluttershy kissed me. I just knew that I was glad that she did.

Flutters wasn’t a terribly experienced kisser, but her lips tasted like warm, buttered biscuits that were just wonderful. She rested her hands on my chest and pulled away after a full minute and probably a little extra of our embrace. “... I…”

“You’re always giving me things, but I can’t say the reciprocal. I’ll have to do something nice for you now.” I said teasingly, giving her a little smile.

Her face was already a little flushed as she looked at me. “... Jay… Thank you for understanding.”

I pressed my lips against her forehead. “I just want you to be happy, Flutters.”

She blinked and her eyes stayed closed for just a fraction of a second too long, opening to reveal Shade Rose’s irises. “Thank you. She would not listen to me.” Shade closed her eyes again to reveal Fluttershy once more.

“I’m sure it’ll become more annoying than scary soon enough.” I said soothingly.

Fluttershy gave me another hug. “... You’re warm.”

“And you smell nice. Keep hugging me and I might not think anything else smells nice ever again.” I jested, having not let go of her in the first place.

She giggled a little and squeezed me a little tighter. “... D-Do you still want to go to Zecora’s?”

“I’m following wherever you’re leading” I finally let her go, though I admit that I kinda did so begrudgingly.

Fluttershy unwound her arms and gently took my hand. “... Your hand feels rough.”

“Working man’s hands, Flutterfly. They’ve seen their fair share of tools.”

She gave me a little smile. “I-It feels strong.”

I returned her smile with one of my own. “And yours feels soft and warm. Are you sure you’re not a radiator in a Pony costume?”

Fluttershy blushed and looked down, her gaze flickering to me every now and again. “I-If y-you-you w-w-want… I-I-I mean… J-Just a little later, y-y-you know…”

I gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Take your time, Flutters. We’re in no hurry.”

She gave me a grateful smile. “M-Maybe later. Sh-Shall we?”

I grabbed her hand and nodded. “On your mark.”

Listening to Twilight drone on and on and on about Magic and all of its wonders was nice and all, but what I really wanted was for some kindly Ranger to come along and put an arrow through my head, specifically at the ear holes. I didn’t want to hear about how Cloud Soul the Winded was such a great Wind Mage, or that Starswirl the Bearded found a hundred and one ways to use a gentle breeze to do daily chores. No, I wanted to hear more about Cairn Drake and his treatise on wind blades and Fulstrom’s compendium on Combat Magicks called The Natural Weapons. Twilight walled me off and we started with my actual training in a field outside town where no one could get hurt if my Magic went awry. We started with some basic channeling exercises and that was pretty interesting.

All along, ever since I’d started paying attention to my instincts, I knew how to tap into the well of Magic near my navel, courtesy of Furladra. I’d never known that I was doing it, but when Twilight asked me to relax as much as possible and feel for centers of warmth or coolness in my body, my belly was the first part of me to answer the call, feeling cool and fuzzy. I was perfectly safe at the moment, and then I felt a certain warmth behind my eyes, which was most likely the Mind-Reading Magic. While Twilight was coaching me through some rather mild stuff, like making the wind blow a little harder by attuning myself to its presence. Given the calm, pleasant climate and conditioning, it really wasn’t hard at all to get into my environment. As the breeze picked up, I wondered if I was the cause from time to time, but as the hour of quiet meditation and deeper introspection, I could feel the world around me. I knew exactly where Twilight was with my eyes closed, where every blade of grass broke the wind…

It was marvelous.

With my mind on the winds, I made them a little stronger, making a stirring motion with my finger, barely making the motion at all to keep it hidden. Once the wind was roaring, blowing Twilight around rather goofily, I made it stop suddenly and she fell to the ground. “Oof! Oh, Gauche, sucks to your assmar!”

“Sucks to your limes, Dearest.” I said drily. “Now you know how I felt.”

Twilight glared at me, her hair a mess and her eyes doing a strange little dance. “You’d better get to running here in a moment, Buster!”

I walked over and shook her around a bit to mess with her some more until she actually did hit me. “Stop it, Butthead.” She huffed.

I recoiled from her blow and gave her a smile when her eyes went back to normal. “So I can make the wind blow. Now I just need to figure out how to put it in a jar.”

Twilight waved her hand. “That’s easy. Just imagine the breeze blowing into the jar, add a little dust so you can tell how much you have in there, and you’ve practically got a smoke bomb that you unscrew and point at ponies. It’s a funny trick when you do it with flour and coat your friends, but please don’t hit me with it. I’m allergic to pranks.”

“I’ll be sure to hit you with it as soon as possible. What’s next on our list of things to learn?”

“Um… You could try channeling your Mana into your hands to try making projectiles like you wanted, I suppose. If you’re as adept as I’m thinking you are, then it shouldn’t be much harder than picturing your prize in your head.”

I thought about it and it didn’t seem like it would be a hard thing to do, but Twilight in all her ever-loving scholarly patience eventually told me to figure it out some other time after two hours had passed and I’d barely made a half-visible arrow. We were burning daylight, so Twilight made me practice tapping my Mana pools and spreading the flow around my body as I needed, but that’s when we learned that Wind Mages get a bit of a boost when letting their Mana flow to other parts of the body. It’s basically just a little speed boost, but that does explain why I tend to be good at dodging things.

After Twilight made me run for awhile, we stopped because she has pathetic stamina for a Pony her age and size, but we ultimately decided that it would be for the best if I found a tutor who specialized in Wind Magic anyway. As an aside, I just have to comment on the fact that I’ve never met a Pony I could outrun until Twilight, so that was cool. Aside over. Twilight didn’t know much about Wind Magic and didn’t have much on it in her libraries since she had a different elemental affinity, though she didn’t want to say what hers was. I suspected that it had something to do with Black Magic, so I left good enough alone and took my leave from Twilight’s company to go find Maud.

Pinkie was working at the bakery we’d gone to the day before, but Maud herself was nowhere to be seen, so I walked up to the counter and waited until Pinkie stopped trying to ignore me. She eventually stopped by and asked, “How can I help you?” In her usual cheery tones.

“Would you happen to know where Maud went?” I asked. “I was hoping to see more of the town with her.”

“I’ve already shown Maud most of Ponyville.” Pinkie gave me a triumphant smirk.

“Ah, then she’ll know a nice scenic route for a walk.” I said blithely, not bothering to bite her bait.

Pinkie frowned at me. “Why don’t you ever jab back?”

“Because you’re Maud’s sister. I offer you the same respect I offer her.” I answered.

“... You just don’t want to get on her bad side by making me upset!” Pinkie accused.

“She’s already shown that she doesn’t need your approval to be with me. I think she’d just prefer that you let me be rather than us continue this little… Whatever it is.”

She glared at me. “Are you gonna order something?”

“I’ll have a vanilla chocolate malt and a bran muffin.” I’d seen the bran muffin in the glass case in the front of the shop when I’d walked in, and it had been calling my name ever since.

Pinkie gave me a look. “What are you, an old Stallion?”

“I should only be about five years older than you.” If Maud was close to seven years older than Pinkie, then it would make sense for me to be around five years older since Maud was nearing thirty.

“Like I said: Old stallion.” She huffed, bouncing off to fill my order.

Pinkie came back with my stuff after a few minutes and I tore into the bran muffin with furious vengeance. Muffins killed my family, took everything from me; I couldn't let the delicious bastard live on in my presence. Not after what muffins have cost me.

Muffin Wars. Never forget.

Incredibly dumb bullshit aside, the muffin was good and the malt was great, so I got out of Pinkie’s hair after learning that Maud was outside of town, looking for more rocks to add to her collection. I didn’t know exactly where she was at, so I wandered around the outskirts of town, trusting my gut to tell me where she was, though it’s never actually worked like that. I did, however, try and expand my awareness by tuning into my gut’s feelings and that was… Interesting. I found that I could feel for the environment while moving, and that I could do a decent amount of observing just by walking around and letting the surroundings come up on my mental map as they pleased. I actually did manage to find Maud, though whether it was by accident or by Magic, I didn’t really know.
I strolled up to my lover with a little hesitation since I didn’t want to step on anything she might be interested in, but Maud was pretty much just standing still, looking at rocks on the ground in a rocky area. Nothing struck me as being terribly interesting, but Maud was putting off a rather positive vibe, so I said, “Looking for love outside of your ever present Boulder?”

Maud frowned ever so slightly. “I will withhold a comment that would hurt your feelings. You will not assume such a thing again.”

“It was a joke, Mable. I wasn’t trying to irritate you or niggle ya.” I said placatingly.

She spared me a glance. “I see… How was your night?”

“... Lonely. It wasn’t all bad, but I missed you.” I answered honestly.

“Why did you miss my presence?” Maud pressed.

“... You put me at ease. I don’t feel as unpredictable when I’m with you, in a manner of speaking. I dunno how to put it, but you make me feel like I’m not about to get stabbed.” And that was saying something. I generally feel like I’m about to get stabbed.

My lover folded her arms and gave me the most mild look I’ve ever gotten from… Fuckin’, I’ve seen faces in nature, in trees, and whatnot, that were more expressive than Maud. Two holes and a line through stone could make a decent face that could do an emotion well enough, but Maud? No, she had to be confusing as shit. I couldn’t tell if she was irritated or amused at whatever I’d apparently said wrong, and that rather sucked eggs because I seemed to be fucking up a lot and Pinkie kept driving that wedge between Maud and I…

“Garrison Varas; are you possibly too macho to say that I make you feel safe?” Maud asked, her monotone unreadable.

“There’s no such thing as safe. Expect the unexpected.”

“... Tell me you are joking.”

“... Would it help if I said that you make me feel like I’m not going to get stabbed?”

“Describe your feelings on whether or not you are about to be slapped.”

We’d been maintaining steady eye contact, so I just had to let the Magic do its thing like I’d been doing. After gleaning some helpful information from Maud’s melon, I said, “You make me feel safe and cared for. You make me feel like I’m not alone, but it…” I trailed off, my face brightening. She’d been right. I was sacrificing a lot of pride to say any of this to her.

“But it what?” She asked quietly.

“... Only helps when I have you around.” I confessed softly. “Can we be done with the pillow-talk and save that for when we’re actually, y’know, near some pillows?”

Maud raised her chin. “What does Furladra make you feel.”

“Confused.” I answered flatly.

“Ha. Ha-Ha. Your Queen comes to claim you and you chose the farmer’s daughter.” Maud raised her eyebrows high, which was odd. I’d never seen her do it.  “What is your life, Garrison? What is it to live your life?”

“You get a lot of achy shoulder blades, achy hands, and tired eyes. That’s pretty much it.”

“Backstabbing, constant trading and haggling, and being incredibly cynical. Your words are poetic in a way. A simple man’s quotes that have deeper meanings than what the average ear would hear.” Maud took a few steps toward me. “I suppose in this way we have found common ground. I find that only those closest to me know of my current state emotionally. I believe you have the same problem as well, do you not?”

I sighed. “Yeah, to an extent.”

“My point. You have trouble, or rather, you choose to make your emotions indecipherable through your words, and I have noticed a shift in your demeanor when you intend on talking your way out of trouble. Your mask fits as well as mine, and I believe this brings us closer.”

“You’re not wrong. I can generally tell how you’re feeling, but when nothing is happening, I can’t ever seem to get into that head of yours. You’re an enigma to me at times, ” Maud stopped a step away from me, “ and I can’t help but wonder if you feel the same way about me. You’ve been in all of my business so far besides the first bit. We’ve had time to get to know each other a little, but-”

“We do not know each other completely. I will admit, Garrison, that I do not regret choosing you. You have proven capable and worthy of respect, but you are a danger to be around.” Maud shook her head. “You attract the worst kind of trouble wherever you go. There is trouble in Jolly Junction. I do not want to see you die in Jolly Junction.”

I wiggled the thumb with the Slave Ring thing on it. “I can’t exactly escape. My only other options right now are to go abroad or head back to Minosia.”

She sighed. “... Then I suppose we have no choice. I hope you live through life as a Ranger. I really do.”

I pinched the bride of my nose. “Mortality rate?”

“... You do not want to hear it.”

“Humour me.”

“... Three in five in the first year. Those who make it to their third year are generally trained well enough to make a career of the job, but four of five die in their second year since that’s when they get sent on the most dangerous missions. If you are not training or recuperating from a mission, you will be making sure that Equestria stays peaceful.” Maud said grimly.

I slid my hands down my face. “So Celestia handed me a sugar-coated death sentence. Bloody fucklesnatcha!”

“... What?”

I sighed heavily and shook my head. “Don't worry about it. It’s not important, but finding a place that sells bows is.”

“... I was going to buy a room at the inn tonight.” Maud hinted not-so-subtly.

I offered her my hand and she took it. “Would you care if I paid for the room?”

“Would you expect to spend the night?”

“I’d at least like to spend a bit of my time with you, so yes.”

Her gaze met mine and mine hers, the moment holding more weight than it really ought to have for fuck’s sake. Three things could possibly go down: Maud might deny me outright and that would branch off into new possibilities. Not all of them were bad paths, but the good would be few and far between for our relationship. If she allowed me to stay, but only for so long, then that would be slightly better, but still yielded many bad fruits. Hæl, even the best route of her allowing me to stay with her was fraught with perils and turmoil. There was no telling how long she would put up with my bullshit, but as I thought I started to consider how dependent I was becoming on Maud. She was my rock, my guiding light in the darkness. She was there for my worst times, and… Well, most of my time on Equis has rather sucked, but still. The thing about that was that I didn’t like feeling dependent on someone else. I realized that I’d always sought some sort of parental figure, but the few women I’d kept company in the past years were rarely worth mentioning twice.

Maud was different.
Mauble… She made me feel less… I don’t suppose it would be more Human. I acknowledge that I’ve never been anything other than a Human, but… I don’t know. Mayhap it’s something to do with my ultimate Fate, whatever that may be. I don’t even know how to describe the feeling, but it doesn’t suck limes nearly as bad as when Maud happened to be around. The woman was someone I wanted in my life by any means necessary, and I decided to fight for her through my words.
I looked her in the eyes and started the countdown. “Maud, I want to-”

“Gauche, I miss your warmth,” Three. “but the sound of your voice, “ Two. “ does not comfort me right now.” One. “You are forcing me to make a very hard choice.” She said softly. ‘I never wanted this. Why did this shady Force of Nature intervene and ruin this for me?’

“Let me share your burdens, then.” I requested, hearing her true voice for the first time in her mind. I was able to hide my complete fascination and newly found  mild obsession with hearing her thoughts well enough, but I felt my eyes widen and I subconsciously bit my lip.

‘Would you truly be so kind?’ Maud thought rather rudely. “I can feel it, Gauche. Stop.”

I blinked and tilted my head. “Do what?”
‘I will hit you’. “I can feel your presence in my mind.”

I flicked my gaze to her left hand and back to her eyes. “It happens when I look someone in the eyes too long. Sorry, Mauble.”

“Do you even realize the level of offense you have committed?” Maud said, her voice level and monotonous as usual, but there was a hard gleam in her eyes that made me want to to be anywhere else.

I shook my head slowly. “... Should I be getting flowers or groveling right now?”

“You should be finding another woman.” Maud said, blinking three times in rapid succession. “If you still wish to be a part of Bite-Back, I will put you in contact with another Agent. Please do not contact me further, Garrison Varas. Take your heart back and return mine.” She made a gesture: her thumb curled into her palm and her fingers cupped over her heart. Maud flipped her hand and pushed it toward me, and though she didn’t touch me, I felt like I’d been hit in the chest by something that didn’t like me much.

Maud walked past me, heading to town while I stood and stared off into the distance, lost. I didn’t even fully understand what I had done to lose her, not even a full minute after I’d sworn to make sure she knew that I wanted her to stay. I turned tail and bolted, rushing toward Maud as fast as my feet would carry me, my heart hammering in my chest. I didn’t have to sprint very long, but I did regret the action. As soon as I started slowing down so I could stop next to her, Maud must have struck, because the candle’s flame was snuffed out like so many others. However, being unconscious tends to be alright, and for the first little bit of nothingness, it was. I don’t know how long that nothingness lasted because it was nothing, and therefore had no meaning in temporality, but now I’m actually sounding like a raving looney.

To explain why my ‘unconsciousness’ ended early, Furladra decided that I needed to visit, so she brought me to her realm. I awoke to find that I wasn’t face-down on a rough, gravelly terrain, but a fine, black silk comforter that smelled of ginger and cinnamon. In a daze, I clutched at the blankets and buried my face in them, taking a deep breath to memorize the scent. It made my face feel warm and the more I breathed it in, the more the warmth spread. Once it resided in every part of me, I lifted my head and looked around lazily, though that was mostly because I had a good feeling in my gut and no recollection of what had just happened. I saw a black and silver garment of some kind and felt Furladra run her fingers through my hair.

“Good morning, Sweetlove. Did you sleep well?” She asked kindly.

I rolled onto my side so I could see her properly, and when I did, I looked up at her and it all hit me at once. “... Fuckin’ fuck.”

Furladra gave me a conciliatory smile. “It’ll be fine, Sweetlove. I know your heart hurts, but now there’s no more confusion, yeah?”

I reached up for her hand and she let me have it, holding my hand to her face. “Mistress, that’s not what I really want to hear right now.”

“I know, but I want you to know that you’ll always have my love, my darling little rogue.” She crooned.

“... What about Ladesa?” I asked softly. “Would you love me more than your own daughter?”

She guided my hand down to her throat and further still to one of her unfortunately warm, soft, pliant breasts and let my hand rest there. “I think you misunderstand my relationship with my daughter, Garry. Ladesa got herself disowned, and don’t let her tell you any different. Now; are we going to talk about my disappointment, or are we going to do some… Healing.” She ended with a purr.

I sat up and held Furladra’s hand, nibbling on my lip while looking into her bottomless green eyes. “... Furladra, you know I was abandoned by my parents.”

She sighed. “So you’re digging into the past?”
“Ladesa is a longtime Varas. If it wasn’t you, would you still ask that I not-”

“Sweetlove, I’ll tell you everything, I just prefer comfort sex.” Furladra said, sounding disappointed.

I gave her an odd look and asked, “Did I just tell a Goddess that I’d rather talk than have sex?”

“Yup.”

“... Am I a tribad?”

“You’re not a Sugarlad, you’ve just your loyalties. I respect that, and I like it. In that order.” She leaned forward and planted a kiss on my cheek. “Now what’s your first question, Lover-Boy?”

“Why are you making Ladesa live eternity in Thief’s Lives?” I asked.

Ladesa pushed me onto my back and laid on my arm, drawing a little circle on my chest when she got settled down. “Where to start, where to start… Hmm… I suppose you could start with the fact that Ladesa is probably one of the least capable Varas around Terra in general. I mean, she’s not pitiful, but the Guild runs on merit and income, and she wasn’t good at casing the good marks or humbling herself at all. The girl had a big head and none of the skills to back it up.”

“... Please tell me that’s not the only reason.” I requested softly.

I felt Furladra start drawing something else, though I couldn’t tell the exact shape it was. “It was a lot of things, Gauche. She thought she could steal from the Gods, steal from me, and that there would never be any consequences. I wasn’t even the one to cast her down, you know. I was there, but I couldn’t protect her from her own idiocy forever.”

“So she stole from other Gods and that earned her a punishment?”

“Thieves don’t last long after they’ve been made. When the Gods feel like they’ve been personally affronted, then they’re not afraid to enter someone else’s realm and make sure that their voice is heard. I had too many people telling me that Ladesa had taken something only to find that she really had been stupid enough to get caught. I didn’t disown her because she was a disgrace: I disowned her because I had to so I could save her eternal soul.” Furladra sighed. “Dissida and Trike still want her head on a pike, but as long as she keeps her nose to the ground and continues to lie low, then they won’t know where she is.”

“... So you’ve been protecting her by changing her face?” I asked softly.

“It’s not something I really want to do, but it’s something that keeps her alive. If she stays the same for too long, not only will the people around her grow suspicious, but the Gods she’s offended most would have sussed her out eventually. The Terran Gods don’t really have a place on Equis, so she’s safe enough for the time being, but ultimately it’s still wise to let her little ‘curse’ run its course. At least until she’s willing to return Trike’s spikes.”

“His cæstus’?”

“Yup. He misses them dearly, and I still hear about them from time to time. Ladesa just doesn’t want to give them back, so if you could convince her otherwise, I might be inclined to do you a little favour or two.”

I’d finally recognized the shape Furladra was drawing on my chest. It was her Seal, but it didn’t really mean much. “I’ll do my best to make her see reason, but I’ve got to admit that the woman is a bit looney in the first place- Ow!”

Furladra stopped pinching me. “I may not contact Ladesa very often, but that’s because I don’t want to give her away. I do love my daughter, so watch that tongue of yours before I make you a eunuch for a week.”

I hugged her to me and she made a delighted noise. “I’ll watch what I say, Furladra. I apologize for forgetting who I was talking to.”

“Garry, how many times do I have to tell you that you can talk to me like a normal woman? You don’t have to revere me anymore.”

I let my lips rest against the top of her head and thought about it for but a moment before saying, “It’s all well and good, but I think I’d like to be alone for a little while, if it’s all the same to you.”

She sighed deeply and covered my body with hers. “Are you sure I can’t convince you to stay a little longer?”

“No, I’m not convinced at all.” I answered honestly.

Furladra made another happy sound before purring. “You won’t regret it, Sweetlove. Now, how can Furry help you mend that broken heart?”

The correct answer was sex, but my answer was, “Can we just stay like this for a little bit? You feel nice.”

Furladra propped herself up and let her locks fall to either side of my face, trapping us both in curtains crafted from follicles. “Are you sure you wouldn’t rather be snogging?”

She had me there, so I sat up and she fell back onto my thighs so we could start slowly. It was a rewarding experience that made my heart ache a lot less than it had been up until that point, but I still couldn’t help but feel like Furladra wasn’t being as forthcoming as she was appearing to. How she managed to slip past all of my defenses and place herself in my heart already left me feeling a little dizzy, but it was a pleasant kind of dizziness that came from being drunk and happy rather than feeling like I was about to chuck at any moment. While my lips were locked with Furladra’s, my day steadily got brighter and brighter, but before I could let the pains of the day ease away completely, Furladra pulled back, nibbling on my lips as she went along.

“Sweetlove~” My Goddess crooned sensually.

“Yes, Furladra?” I asked breathlessly.

“Have you ever seen a shaven woman?”

“... I have not.” I answered uneasily.

She grinned and kissed me again, but it was brief this time around. “Maybe next time then. I’ll see you soon, my dear Gary-Berry.”

“How long will it be?”

“Oh, attached already?” Furladra teased.

“Well, now that I don’t have a distraction from the woman I should have been focusing on in the first place, I’d rather like to know that I’ll see you sooner rather than later.” I gave her a sheepish smile.

She let her arms rest over my shoulders and smiled. “You’re forgiven, Sweetlove. Just don’t make a habit of trying to make me jealous, okay?”

“No woman I’ve ever met compares to you, Furladra. Truly, there are none like you.” I replied praisingly.

Furladra beamed before guiding my head into her bosom. “Waking up isn’t going to be fun, but I want you to remember this moment when you do. It’s not that bad, Garrison; you’ve just had a little hiccup in the plan. Keep your wits about you, Bruvva.”

“I sharpen them daily.” I chuckled. “Thank you, Furladra. You didn’t have to come.”

She headbutted me softly. “I did if I actually wanted to show that I want you. I called dibs in the end, but if I can have you now, then I will.”

I kissed her nose, summoning an awful lot of courage for the familiar gesture. “It makes my heart beat like a madman with a drum when you claim me. I think I might be fond.”

My Goddess smiled once more, but the next time I blinked, I felt myself shift and face downward on the ground, my jaw aching and my head throbbing. I’d been knocked out before, so I put two and two together and figured that Maud flattened me for trying to go after her. Again, it took me a moment to realize what was going on once the nothingness had faded, but I felt like no time had passed between my final flirtation with Furladra and my lamentable loss of my lover.

My mind was acting like a fried fish, and I was slowly glueing the events back together as I picked myself up, dusted myself off, and made my way back to town.

I watched on passively as Garrison talked to Furladra before shifting my focus to Applejack and Ladesa for a spell, the pair of them making headway into becoming lifelong friends. They worked in the orchards of Sweet Apple Acres, though Ladesa had been free to leave for some time at this point. Applejack, however, was glad for the company as she kicked trees like a crazy person to make apples drop out of them like Magic.  It was good bonding time for both of them, and as they casually chatted and worked up a sweat doing manual labour, they found that Ladesa was actually pretty damn good with a giant wooden mallet.

I mean, I might be God, but a woman with a two-handed blunt weapon always makes me smile. It just makes the world seem a little brighter.

As the pair moved onto the last trees of the current section, I whispered to Applejack. ‘Having fun?’

‘Yes, Actually’ She thought back.

“-but the guy was all like, ‘You stole me coinpurse!’,” Ladesa did a silly gruff voice, “so I had to look at the guy and ask, ‘Where do you think I hid it? Up me bloody snatch?’.”

Applejack snorted and burst with laughter. “But why were ya naked in the first place, Desa!? Why!?”

Ladesa blushed. “It was a bathhouse!”

“They had communal baths in Avalesce?”

“Well, yeah. When most of the folks can’t actually afford a house or the wood for a fire, most people either bathe in the bathhouse or in some water nearby.”

“When was the last time you actually took a bath, though? Isn’t a shower just better?”

Ladesa’s face flushed before she realized that Applejack wasn’t trying to imply that she stank. “I dunno what a shower is. Is that when ya just bathe in rain?”

Applejack gave her a funny look. “When was the last time ya heard of somepony washin’ up in rain?”

“When was the last time you heard me ask about some newfangled thingamabob thatcha had?”

“Ya mean like the lamps?” Applejack teased.

Ladesa nodded and smiled. “Those things are so victus! They’re like little torches that
don’t blind you!”

The Mare just chuckled and shook her head for a moment before they came to their final copse. “Alright, Desa. I’ll betcha that I can nail these two rows and start on yours before ya can even get halfway done!”

The Demi-Goddess ate the bait like it was candy coated. “You’re on, farm-girl!”

And so they tried their mettle against each other, though Applejack didn’t know if she would actually manage to win for sure. Ladesa was no slouch with the mallet, but Applejack had been kicking fucking trees for years. I decided to give them each a little pep talk. ‘Rah rah rah! Go go go! Ap-ple-jack will run the show!’

“Are ya really doin’ this now? Seriously? Where do ya go when I actually need ya!?’ Applejack thought at me petulantly.

‘Watching instead of talking. Duh.’

She started thinking some very unkind things about and at me for a little while, so I decided to look into Ladesa’s mind and give her a cheer for herself. ‘De-sa, De-sa, she’s the gal! She’ll fuck up all of your pals!’

“Shut up, Max.” She chuckled.

‘You know you love me.’

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your Mum’s still fat.” Ladesa whacked her third tree and apples fell into some buckets like it was supposed to make sense to the average mind.

‘Sure, but your Mum gay.’

She chuckled again. “True enough. Mind helping me cheat?”

‘What are you going to ask for if you win?’

“Uh… I dunno.” Ladesa whacked anther tree and apples rained down.

‘Make it a kiss and I’ll make sure you win.’

“Shut the fuck up you ancient lecher!” Her face flushed and she burst into giggles. “You just want to see two cute girls snog, don’t you?”

‘Zoinks! Let’s skedaddle gang!’

“I still don’t get you.” She shook her head and carried the buckets from her trees over to the wagon they’d brought along with them, making a trip for every two buckets.

Applejack, however, could do four in one go without really trying, so she was able to beat Ladesa handily, though neither of them were terribly upset about the outcome. When they got back to the wagon, Applejack started dragging it along as Ladesa asked, “So what do you want for winnin’ the bet? I don’t think we agreed on anything, but I’m sure I could do ya some kinda favour.”

Applejack scoffed. “It was just ta make ya work faster so we could get done quicker. I ain’t exactly fond a’ wastin’ the little bit of free time I get.”

“Ah, I kinda get that. I’m guessin’ we’re not stayin’ on the farm for long.”

“Nope. We’re gettin’ washed up, then we’re headin’ out again to go see the girls for a slumber party, remember?”

“Ah, I wonder if Gauche is gonna be alright with Maud. I don’t think pinkie really wants her with him anyway.”

“Maud’s her own Mare, Ladesa. I think things’ll work out just fine between her and Gauche for just as long as she wants ‘em to, though I don’t get why you’re worried about it.”

Ladesa sighed. “I’m just… Varas look out for each other and Gauche has done a lot of looking out for me. I just wanna be able to help the guy out since he’s been doing me so many favours, y’know?”

“How would getting involved in his relationship be doin’ him any favours? Best thing is to just let it play out. Unless you’re worried about him gettin’ with your Momma instead.” Applejack giggled.

The Human rolled her eyes. “I doubt she would actually take him as a consort, but he does have way too much of her favour.”

“Eh, I wouldn’t worry about it. If your Momma don’t like ya, just know that I do.” Applejack gave her a warm smile.

Ladesa, thinking of my words from earlier, couldn’t help the minute blush that spread across her cheek. “I like you too, AJ. You’re a real nice gal.”

“Just nice? Are ya sure I ain’t great?”

Ladesa laughed. “Sure thing, farm-girl. You’re pretty great.

I decided to leave them alone after that, but I’d be paying special attention to that little piece of the pie, if anything then for the sake of seeing some hot, steamy, sexy, dripping girl-on-girl friendship going on. However, I turned the majority of my attention back to Garrison as he realized that he didn’t have any obligation to be anywhere at the time.

As I was walking back to Ponyville, I realized that there was no reason for me to go back other than to go and get some rest or go and get food. I wasn’t tired and I wasn’t hungry, so I decided to fuck around with my Magic for awhile and see what I could do with it. However, awhile turned out to mean all night since I was having fun with blowing blades of grass in spirals with gusts of wind that were strong enough to lift me off of my feet. Speaking of… I learned the basics of flight! I couldn’t do it particularly well, and I constantly lost my balance in the air until I realized that I could tie my cloak to my boots and fly by using an updraft and changing the wind’s direction to steer me. It was so cool! I’ve always loved going up high, but I didn’t want to risk it since getting ten feet away from the ground meant that I’d had a harder landing than any of the others, so I considered more ways that I could possibly fly. When dawn broke, I was still trying to form wings of wind on my back so I could fly like an Avian. I could feel the connection to my body as I steered my Mana into my back and let it seep out of my shoulder-blades. I stood in deep concentration for hours, entirely focused on the feeling of wings on my back until I was shaken by a curious bystander who’d seen me from the edge of town. The wings didn’t dispel with my concentration, so I was a little pleased by that.

“Excuse me, young Stallion? Are you alright?” The older fellow asked politely.

I blinked a few times and rubbed dust off of my eyelids, looking around. “Oh, the joys of practicing Magic. Gods above, I can see how someone can devote a lifetime to this stuff now.”

“Ah, trying to bond with your Mana Pools?” He asked, clearly amused.

“In a manner of speaking. I’m honestly trying to fly.”

“Wind Magic?”

“Wind Magic.”

He smiled sadly. “Bout the only thing it’s good for. Are you making any headway?”

“I can feel the wings on my back, but I know that they’re not fully formed yet. Once they are, I’ll give it a shot.”

His brows raised and he whistled. “Wow, I never thought of trying to fly like that! That actually sounds like it could work if you’re lucky!”

“I tend to be.” I replied, chuckling. “What’s your name, Bruv?”

“Ah, they call me Tick Tock. I own the clock shop in town. If you ever need a watch or, well, a clock, I keep everything tip-top!”

“I’ll be sure to stop by, then. It never hurts to have a good watch.” I gave him a nod.

He looked around for a moment and gave me a devious grin. “You strike me as a trustworthy kinda Stallion. How would you feel about some enchanted watches?”

“I know an Artificer and he’s a B-Rank. I think I’m covered.” I said kindly, shutting down his sell instantly.

Tick Tock blinked. “... Oh. Damn. I guess you don’t run into too many of those.”

I shook my head. “He’s a valuable asset, that’s for sure. If there’s nothing else, I need to go find something to eat.”

“Ah, sorry to have interrupted you and held you up.” He apologized graciously.

“Think nothing of it, Bruv. Be seeing you.” I started off in a random direction so I’d know if he was following me.

“Uh, Gauche? Town’s that way.” He said as I walked away.

I stopped and looked at him. “I never told you my name.”

“... Bye!” He bolted and ran for town while I followed at a much more sedated gait, my empty stomach and irritation preventing me from chasing after him.

I just wanted to be left alone for the most part, so I got into town and asked some of the early risers about where I could find a meal before sunset. Everyone I asked told me to head to The Scrambled Sun for breakfast, so I took their advice and made my way to the place that was called a ‘diner’. Once I reached my destination, I let myself in and took a seat, assuming that tavern rules were in play while I browsed the menu. I’d never heard of a ‘huevos rancheros’, but they sounded good, so I ordered them and a cup of coffee. The diner had honey, but I had to order something called a ‘waffle’ to get some, so I had a fairly large breakfast in front of me, which only ended up costing me twelve bits, and that’s including the tip.

As I was chowing down on my eggs and varied veggies, a Mare with a coat that was the fairest shade of peach I’d ever seen and a pastel blonde mane with creamy orange lowlights sat across from me with a plate of her own, filled with hotcakes and whipped cream. “Wotcha, Love! How are you?” She gave me a big smile and cut into her hotcakes with her fork.

I raised a brow and sipped my coffee. “Doing just fine, though I’ve got to ask where
you’re getting all this cheer so early in the morning.”

I paid a little more attention to the odd cloak she was wearing and the brown jerkin underneath, giving me a strange feeling that wasn’t exactly bad per se. “Just havin’ breakfast, but y’know some ponies just can’t stand eating alone. If ya don’t want me to stay, I’ll find somepony else to bother.”

I shrugged. “My booth is your booth, Miss…?”

She extended a hand over our food and we shook as she said, “Amaretta Snow, at your service! And you’re Gauche Suede, yeah?”

“... You’re one of Celestia’s Rangers, aren’t you?” I asked, sighing.

“I sure am, and so are you now! Don’t worry, Love! I’ll see ya through to the end of your term and make sure ya get out alive!” She gave me a winning smile.

I nodded. “Can you teach me how to shoot first? I’m already stealthy, I just can’t shoot for shit.”

She took a bite of her food and bobbed her head from side to side as she chewed. “It’s all in the feels, Suede. We’ll get you practicing as soon as possible, so chin up!”

I gave her another nod and took a bite of my own sustenance. “Thank you, Amaretta. You know, I can’t say I’ve ever seen a Pony with your coloration. It suits you.”

She patted her mouth with a paper napkin and gave me a big smile. “Thanks, Suede, but I think I like your eyes and mane more. Black and green just go so well with each other!”

“What color is your coat, exactly?” I asked.

“Oh, my coat is pastel apricot and the lowlights in my mane are atomic tangerine. Are you familiar with Equestrian customs by any chance?” She asked, her eyes full of mirth.

“I can’t say that I am, honestly.”

“I figured!” She giggled. “You know you practically just asked me what my wingspan is, right?”

“That’s like asking your measurements, isn’t it?” I asked, rubbing my sparse beard and taking the last bite of my eggs. Most of the veggies were already gone, so I moved onto the waffle and poured more honey in my coffee.

Amaretta did a doubletake and opened her mouth. “Yes, but did you just put syrup in coffee?”

“No, I put honey in coffee.” I replied.

“... Huh. It’s an old Ranger tale that a good Ranger puts honey in their coffee before they reach the core. I guess the omens are good for you!” She gave me another big smile.

“Here’s hoping that the ill tides don’t come to bear while I’m in the Corps.” I snorted.

“I’m sure you won’t die, so don’t be worried! I’ve only lost seven recruits in the past two years, so your chances are better with me than with most!”

I furrowed my brow. “Will we just be going on missions together, or-”

“Nope! You’ll be moving into my house here in Ponyville! Kinda in Ponyville! It’s close enough.” She made a ‘What can ya do?’ kind of gesture that amused me, but I was still busy being sketched out.

“... I really don’t want to intrude on you. I have friends I can-”

“It’s no problem, Suede! Just don’t leave your door open at night and I promise I won’t try to come snuggle up to ya!” She winked at me and took another bite of her hotcakes.

Maybe it was the crushing blow Maud had dealt to me, or maybe it was because Amaretta was actually pretty fucking beautiful, but I found myself wanting to flirt with her. “And if I leave my door cracked just the tiniest smidge? Are you just going to waltz into the bed of a professional snuggler?”

“Ooh, a professional? Does that mean you get ‘pokey’ before I lay down?” Her gaze went from wide and bright to half-lidded and smoky, her eye shadow making her mulberry eyes seem that much more inviting.

I didn’t think I was making a far leap. “That depends on whether or not I’m expecting you, Lover.”

Amaretta giggled some more and sipped her odd drink that had a string hanging out of it. It looked like tea, but I don’t recall ever seeing tea in a bag-thing. “You know, I don’t get to flirt very much. Most Rangers are foreign, so they don’t like Ponies that much in the first place, and the civilians are always afraid of a Ranger’s lifestyle. I like ya, Love. You’re cute and pleasant.”

“For a tail, you’re not half bad yourself. I’m just wondering why I’m being garrisoned in Ponyville rather than Jolly Junction.”

“Apparently your partner told Celestia that she didn’t want ya living with her any more. Tough break, Love.” She pulled a face.

I chewed some waffle and found it to my liking. “... Yeah. She broke up with me last night.”

“Ah, so I’m hitting on a Stallion on the rebound. Sorry, Love.”

“It’s fine, Amaretta. There are worse things to do.”

“Still, it’s in poor taste. Kinda reflects badly on me, y’know?”

“I don’t see why. I just so happen to be picking up from where I left off, just on slightly shakier ground.”

She gave me a charming smile. “That’s the spirit! What say we finish up with breakfast here in a few and head back to my place for a good morning’s sleep?”

“Ah, I’ve got a walk to make first. I’ve gotta let my sister know where I’ve been all night and tell her that we’re not leaving Ponyville.” I explained.

“You have a sister? Does she look like you?” Amaretta asked interestedly.

“We’re not related by blood, so no. If you come along with me instead of stalking, you’ll probably recognize her.”

She snapped her fingers. “I knew you saw me yesterday! My gut’s rarely wrong!”

“I say the same thing about mine, to be honest with you.” I went back to my coffee and attacked my waffle shortly after, the crispiness delighting my mouth, each little square fucking my tongue in a horribly pleasurable orgy of some kind..

Amaretta took two more bites of her hotcakes before asking, “So why are you a Ranger? What did you do to get stuck with it?”

“Made some morally questionable decisions for the greater good in Minosia and it’s still biting me in the arse, to be honest with you. I did what I had to do to survive, and I’m pretty sure that I’d be a tried and true citizen if none of the bullshit had gone down.”

She kept eating and considered my words, so I carried on myself. When she cleared most of her plate, I was polishing off the last bite of my waffle. “Ah, I think that’s a decent enough dinner for today. Are you ready to take that walk?”

I nodded. “Let’s get going.”

I left a tip and so we walked across town. Amaretta was extremely easy to talk to, and since she was going to be my partner in the Ranger Corps, I assumed that it would be pertinent to tell her a slightly censored version of my involvement with Bite-Back and how that had come back to bite me. She found most of it amusing since I kept it fairly light, but I was still reeling from all of the things that were whacking me one by one. It sucked something fierce, but I didn’t want to bitch and moan all day, so I asked about some of Amaretta’s missions and about some of her past on our walk and she was very forthcoming with information.

As she told me, Amarretta Snow was a small town Unicorn who’d gotten into some strange and powerful Magic when she was young that she didn’t elaborate upon, but she did tell me that she’d retrieved the grimoire she’d learned from in her Grandfather’s study one day. Apparently the spell she cast drained her of all Magic for years, leaving her to learn how to defend herself and her family through the bow rather than with Magic as they always had. She had to explain that her small town was protected by her family and another that had done so for generations, and that such protection was only necessary because of a roaming band of Cats and Dogs that had somehow managed to sneak into the country to terrorize small settlements and build their wealth that way. In other words, it was an old rivalry between the honest country folk and the brigands that make their roads, which I’d heard plenty tell of in Avalesce.. Sadly, one day when they came to town, the bandits had grown considerably by merging with a Donkey clan and they laid waste to the entire village, leaving only Amaretta and a few select others alive to see another day. I asked how she escaped from her town and she told me that she hadn’t and my blood ran cold. All I could do was offer her my condolences, but she didn’t need them, apparently.

We came to Sweet Apple Acres as I told Amaretta about Vex and a few of our tales, and when we got to the farmhouse proper, we ran into Big Mac as he was on his way out to get started on work. He let us know that Applejack and Ladesa were over at Twilight’s for the remainder of a slumber party, so we headed inside to let Granny Smith know where I’d been and to ask her to carry a message if she managed to see Ladesa before I did. She agreed and offered me breakfast, which I had to politely decline, and with that Amaretta and I were back on the road to her house. We filled the time by trading stories, though when we had to head back out of town to go to her cottage in the Mulekick Woods. Still, it was a good way to burn off a little bit of breakfast, and it was an even better way to get to know Amaretta a little better.

When we came to Amaretta’s modest home, I couldn’t help but smile. The cobblestone chimney and wooden walls made me feel like I was looking at a hunter’s cabin, and the fire pit outside only made me feel even more at home. It was a pleasant place to look at, and when I saw Amaretta’s smiling face looking up at me, I wondered what she had on her mind. “Do ya wanna go inside yet? I’m telling you now that it’s even more perfect on the inside than it is on the outside!”

“I’m ready and willing, Lover. Let’s see what’s going on, yeah?”

She clapped softly and hopped twice. “Yesh! I never get to show off!”

Amaretta offered me her hand and I let her have mine so she could drag me inside, but when we got in, I was floored. Every wall was adorned with at least three pieces of art that could only be described as Avant Garde, and the floor was a polished wood that seemed to shine, despite the only light being the Sun as it climbed in the sky, filtered by nearby trees. The mandala rug that adorned the center of the first room was a beautiful study in reds and yellows, all of them mixing together to give the impression of a star. Amaretta’s taste in furniture was styled more toward the same color scheme as her rug, seeing as how her three chairs were yellow, orange and red in turn, while her sofa had a sky-like color palette that was interesting in and of itself. The curtains matched the rug perfectly, and after I got a good look at everything in the ‘living room’, Amaretta took me to the kitchen.

The hardwood in the kitchen was a mess of splatters and scratches, unlike the floor in the living room, though I attributed that to Amaretta being a clumsy cook, or having a previous spouse be a clumsy cook. Either way, the floor needed work, but the storage things called ‘cabinets’ were all the a darker wood than the cabin and floor, and the ‘refrigerator’ was a strange material that I’d never seen before. I mean, it was obviously painted, but it was black and appeared to be made out of some kind of metal, but I wouldn’t know until I had time to check. Amaretta was surprised to find that I didn’t know what any of the things in the kitchen actually did other than the thing that was obviously supposed to be some kind of cooker on top with a self heating oven making up the bulk of the machination. She showed me how to use a coffee pot, which was a blessing, and it was even simple to use, though the pot we made was going to have to be reheated for whenever we actually wanted to drink it.

With the main tour of the house over, Amaretta showed me the bathroom and taught me how to work the shower as well as the sink before she lead me to the room that was probably meant for someone half my size with twice as many things as I have. As it was, the room was a little small, but it was supposedly mine for the time being, so I thanked Amaretta for being kind and she gave me my first hug of the day before announcing that she was going to get showered up and head to bed since I’d made her sit in a field all night, staring at an unmoving target for most of it. I picked out some clothes for myself and waited for her to tell me that it was my turn, but when she came into my room to say so, all she was wearing was a towel that really didn’t cover much. Now, Amaretta’s bust might be around the same size as Twilight’s, which is to say that it’s not terribly impressive, but her derriere?

Lords above, save me from temptation.

I could see the majority of Amaretta’s soft, silken coat as it was slicked down, and I do mean I saw the majority. Her chest was completely covered, so her modesty was spared there, but her bottom distended her towel in such a way that it left her flower unattended, and her precious lips managed to peek out from between her plump, luscious, squeezable thighs and it was there an then that I became a member of the Thick Thigh Theocracy. I had to drag my gaze away from her thighs, and after I managed to get my eyes away from her sex, I realized that she was looking at me expectantly.

“... I am so sorry, but I think you’ve just changed my preference.” I said, looking her in the eyes.

She raised a brow and gave me a skeptical smile. “Preference on what? How long to look at a Mare’s legs?”

“Which part of a Mare is most attractive. It’s definitely the things- thighs. Fuck.” I blushed rubbed my temples. “I’m going to go shower. Don’t be surprised if there’s no steam.”

She blushed and tittered, undoing the towel on her head to let her damp mane hang free. “Well while you’re cooling down, I’m going to get ready for bed. See you tonight, Love.”

“See you later, Lover.” I shook my head and chuckled before she turned around. The perfectly curved cheeks of her posterior greeted me as she turned around, her towel lifted slightly by her tail, allowing the bottom of her bottom to slip out as she walked away.

I looked up and folded my hands. “Forgive me Furladra, for I’m being lead straight into temptation. There is no temptation greater than you, but she might be trying for something. Please slap me so I know not to do something stupid.”

Nothing happened, so I took a lukewarm shower. I dried off and wrapped my towel around my waist since I’d left my clothes back in my room, but when I got back to said room, Amaretta was sitting cross-legged on my borrowed bed in ‘pajama pants’ and a loose fitting shirt. “Wotcha, Love!”

“Wotcher, Lover. Mind if I get dressed in a mo’?” I asked pleasantly.

She patted the space next to her and I sat down. “I won’t be long, Pinkie Promise. I just wanna know something.”

“Sure thing. Ask away.”

“What do you know about Maudileena Daisy Pie?”

“I know that she’s a geologist-”

“I know you know her better than that.” Amaretta sighed.

“I can’t give you evidence against her, even if I had any.”

“Is she threatening your life?”

“No, but it’s against my code to strike out against someone who’s helped me before. Maud’s done a lot for me. She’s been there for me ever since I got to Minosia in the first place, and the month I’ve known was one of the rougher ones I’ve ever experienced. The woman’s patched me up from Death’s Door twice now, so I owe her my life two times over, even if she wants nothing to do with me.” I said, my tone firm, but not unkind.

“If you withhold information from the Golden and Silver Crowns you will be sent to the Changeling Hive nearest to us, you know that, right?”

“... I suppose my Fate is darker than I expected.” I said, seeing right through her facade.

“We can rip the information from your mind, you know.”

“As unpleasant as that sounds, that’s what it’s going to take.” I said softly.

Amaretta nodded a few times before letting her hand creep over mine. “... I know Maud from Bite-Back. She told me about what Odysseus did to you. Who he made you… consume.”

“... Can we not talk about that?”

She gave me a warm, tender smile. “Love, my orders were to slit your throat if you gave Maud up. Do you know who those orders came from?”

“I don’t suppose you’re going to tell me that it was the Quarter Chief, was it?” I asked.

“Quarter Chief gets his orders from Celestia~” Amaretta sang cheerfully.

The blood drained from my face. “... Fuckin’ what.”

“It’s true!”

“... Celestia almost got this fuckin’ world destroyed.” I said quietly.

Amaretta squeezed my hand. “Say again, Love?”

“I’m a person of interest to the Creator for some reason. He wants me alive to fulfill his plans, but if Celestia kills me, then the world will crumble at his mercy. Specifically the lack thereof.”

“... Oh. Close call.” She chuckled. “Ah, well. It’s all fine anyway!”

I let go of her hand and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, the desperate need to feel close to someone surfacing, rearing its ugly head like it did on occasion. “... Yeah. Yeah, I guess we’re good for the time being.”

Amaretta leaned into me and took a deep whiff. “Ooh, you smell delicious!”

I sniffed her mane. “Your mane smells wonderful. Roses?”

“Nettle Rose is the scent. I’m really fond of it, but I like that you like it!”

“I’m glad that you like my soap. It was an impulse buy during one of my many stops during my trip to the Teleportation Station with Twilight.”

“You know, as a Royal Ranger, you’re gonna have to start calling her Princess Twilight Sparkle, right?”

“I’m personally friends with her. I think I’ve earned the honor of dropping the titles.” I replied.

“Even then you should still offer her proper respect, Suede. I know you’re probably not that interested, but the few Rangers who actually chose to be Rangers are really loyal to the Crowns.”

I sighed and rubbed her arm. “I’ll keep it in mind when I’m around more Rangers. And you, I suppose.”

She patted my chest and gave me a peck on the jaw, surprising me. “Bully!” She leaned away and hopped off of the bed. “If there’s anything you need, I’ll be catching up on my sleep! Or waiting for you to come and surprise me with a kiss. Whichever.” Amaretta shrugged and skipped out of my room, closing the door behind her.

I hated to see her go so soon since I was feeling particularly lonely at the moment, but I myself was starting to get tired, so I got dressed for bed and tried to sleep, but my mind wouldn't let me rest. After all, Maud had given me no real explanation as to why she didn’t want to be with me, but I could assume a few things. One would be the complicated relationship I had with Furladra, who I would always side with if she ever so much as asked, and another thing probably had to be the fact that my future seemed to be drawing nearer and nearer as the moments ticked by, probably culminating at either the end of Celestia’s pen or some bandit’s lucky arrow. However, there was also the fact that Maud had been able to tell that I was reading her mind when I was looking into her eyes, and I was sure that she felt some kind of violated, and that hadn’t helped my case at all.

I thought back to the moment before I saw her form blur, when I was slowing down to stop next to her. I found myself wishing that I had just let her go and gone back to Sweet Apple Acres to let her cool down for a little bit. I wished that things had gone differently and hoped that I could still save what I had with Maud, but I already knew that she didn’t want me to live with her as her partner in Bite-Back as I was pulling Ops for Equestria at the same time. Just thinking about the fact that Maud didn’t want me anymore made me ache inside, and the thought of replacing her with the bubbly and expressive Amaretta just made my heart hurt that much worse.

The lime-suckingest part of the whole thing was that I could easily see myself with Amaretta due to her positive outlook and the nature of her job. I assumed that Amaretta was a dangerous woman because I could feel mild amounts of lunacy rolling off of her when I sat next to her, and it didn’t help that she’d implied that she’d been a slave to some cretins that needed to be put down for a year. She struck me as a lethal type of woman who could smile in your face while sticking a dagger in your heart, and while that kind of crazy tended to scare me, I just felt… I felt like a dingy in the middle of the biggest ocean available, subject to the winds and tides of whatever storm happened to be blowing in next, and I needed an anchor to keep me down. I knew that if I stayed with Amaretta and she continued acting like she was, then I was going to let lust turn into love and it would hurt all over again when she cut me out of her life, just like Maud. Just like Isla. Just like Rebecca. Just like Heather. Just like Flint.

I was tired of being hurt by the women in my life, but I didn’t know how to end the vicious cycle that liked to follow me, dogging my heels as the memories and emotions swirled around inside my head and made a mess of my formerly organized thoughts. It was like being trapped in an iron maiden made of my own choices, each decision sharper than a tack, more jagged than a cliff’s face, and longer than a finger. Stabbing pain entered my heart and I gave up on trying to sleep alone, though I didn’t know how long I’d tossed and turned, trying to find some manner of comfort in the seemingly few happy memories I had. My short walk to Amaretta’s room was made with heavy steps until I reached her door, so I hoped that she knew that I was approaching. I didn’t know if I was welcome for sure, so I pushed her door gently, surprised that it swung open.

My eyes were welcomed to the sight of something I’d never seen before: a woman masturbating. I’d caught men doing it throughout my life in many random places that weren’t always a bathouse or their own house, but never before had I seen a woman with her trousers and pants around her ankles; her fingers rubbing and dipping into her quim. Amaretta’s eyes were closed when I opened the door, but I wasn’t watching her face for long. Her soft moans, the beautiful soprano she gently sang, was intoxicating in its own right, but the sight of her fingers glistening with her own nectar made my mouth flood in excitement.

If I stepped into her room, I would be interrupting her stress relief and would thereby be obligated to either apologize and leave or stay and offer to finish the job. I started to wonder what I should do until I heard Furladra say, ‘You lose every battle you don’t fight, Lover-Boy. Brandish your sword and show her sheath what a real blade is like, you ninny!’

Well okay then.

I knocked on the open door softly and Amaretta moaned, removing her fingers from her most private place. “Suede, give me a moment, okay?”

“I thought you wanted a surprise.” I teased gently.

Her eyes shot open and her face exploded into a blush as a wide smile adorned her lips. “Ah! Come in, come in! I was just thinking about you!”

I closed the door behind me before crossing the distance between the door and the bed, climbing up onto the firm-yet-soft mattress as Amaretta wiggled to give me some space, kicking her trousers and knickers off completely. “Were you thinking or dreaming?”

“Does daydreaming count as thinking?”

“I think thinking counts as daydreaming, so we’ll say you were dreaming about me.” I crawled up next to her and stopped within kissing distance if we both leaned in a little. I couldn’t withhold the temptation to stroke her thigh, so I didn’t bother with it and let my hand slide up her satiny fur, earning myself a definite noise of approval as I did so. “If we’re saying thinking is dreaming, then I think I’m here to make your dreams come true.”

Amaretta licked her upper lip and bit the lower one. “Mmm~ that sounds awfully nice, but do you know what I was dreaming of?”

“I won’t until you tell me.” I quipped.

She leaned in, so I followed suit. “I was dreaming of you coming in and ravishing me. Can you do that, Suede? Can you take a woman?”

I was pretty sure she was asking me to rape her.

I mean…
You-

It was weird, but I had pent up aggression in the first place, so I assumed that I could just treat it as rough sex, which I had some experience with. I wanted to make Amaretta let me sleep in her bed so I actually could sleep, so I had to choose whether to be sexually violent, which wasn’t an appetizing prospect, or I had to ‘sleep’ alone, knowing that all I would have to do was sacrifice my morals once for eight hours of rest.

I’ve sacrificed more for less, all things said and done, so I let my hand drift up Amaretta’s side, overt her stomach and breasts, and up to her throat. I grabbed her and squeezed gently, levelling a look at her that was more placid than I was feeling at the moment. “I can ravish, Lover, but are you going to regret it?”

“Ask me that when you’re done, little colt.” She challenged, trying to remove my hand.

I squeezed harder to maintain my grasp and casually backed up, dragging her to her knees before she hit me in the stomach. It wasn’t terrible as far as punches go, but she could have went for the soft bits and forced me off of her that way, so the flag had been waved and the games were beginning. I tried to recall every incident of rough sex that I’d ever heard of, every non-bloody tale of one of the most heinous crimes one can commit told by one of humanity’s lowest, and put it into action. I slapped Amaretta harshly and the look she gave me for it was incensing to say the least, but it didn’t make me want to hurt her anymore than I already had. In fact, I was feeling pretty fucking terrible for hitting the person putting a roof over my head, but she’d just told me that she wanted it. It felt so incredibly wrong to abuse someone for the sake of pleasure, but then Amaretta punched me for taking too long with my next move again, so I returned the favour on pure fucking instinct; not because it seemed like a good idea.

I’d had to let go of her throat, but I easily knocked the wind out of her and she clutched her stomach, so I seized her throat again to prevent her from getting her breath back and used her moment of weakness to pick her up and throw her onto her back. I’m not exactly the strongest guy around, but Unicorns in general are pretty light, and Amaretta would’ve been petite if it weren’t for her endowments. If she was over a hundred and thirty pounds, or about fifty-nine kilos, I’d have been rather surprised. Still, her weight went almost entirely into her lower body, so it was a little difficult to unbalance her. I was proud for exactly one second before the shame and guilt settled in, my body on some kind of automated-piloting system. Hereupon to be named as ‘autopilot’.

I had to let go of Amaretta’s throat to keep things safe, just hard. As she gasped for air, the first breath she took is when I forced her legs apart and manhandled her so that I could keep her legs from kicking at me and I could easily drag her back to me if she decided that she wanted to make me feel like an even bigger piece of shit. I wasn’t expecting her to do much when I pinned her wrists above her head. Amaretta beamed up at me, panting heavily with half lidded eyes, her warm, rapid breaths blowing across my chin and lips as I hesitated above her.

“What are you waiting for?” She purred. “You have me right where you want me~”

I looked at her, my stomach as sour as a hundred limes concentrated into a single shot of distilled lime liqueur. “... I can’t.”

She craned her neck and looked at ‘me’. “Are you sure about that, Love?”

I let off and sat back. “My gut’s telling me that this is the wrong move. My gut’s never wrong. This all feels wrong.” I shook my head. “I know you’re asking for it, but it’s out of my depth.”

Amaretta gave me another warm smile. “I knew it! Wanna know a secret? Just between us partners?”

I looked into those mulberry marvels. “Are you going to stab me?”

She used one of her hands to touch herself, mere inches away from my member, only to reveal that there was something inside of her. It was a small tubular device that seemed to have metal on the inside and my erection died. My penis was shot to death and buried in black-powder before being set alight. “This is a Mare’s defense against a rapist. See, this little doohickey fits inside without being a real disturbance, and it stays in one place. When a Mare is out of town, she usually uses one of these, and with the enchantments on these, they can grow to fit any male who happens to have fewer morals than you, and it doesn’t really come off. The Mare feels nothin’, and the male’s gotta go somewhere to have the thing removed. Pretty obvious tell for a rapist, and it’s not possible for somepony without the Mare’s permission to take it out. Handy, ain’t it?”

“... You tried to bait me and frame me?” I asked, surprised at how much trust I’d bestowed a fucking stranger.

Fucking. Cute. Cunts. Gods. Damn. It.

Amaretta tossed the thing to the side. “Whenever a known threat is introduced into the Ranger Corps, there are a few tests that come up. We know you’re not a rapist, so you’ve passed and that mark’ll appear on your citizenship pass.”

I stared at her.

She grabbed me sausage. “Actually having sex is optional, but why not, right? I really do like you, Suede, I wouldn’t have been touching myself if I didn’t want to.” I stopped her hand, but she kept talking. “Look at it; you passed the first check with the shower, the second check afterward when I was in your room, and you passed the third check: All with flying colours. It’s a test, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want you.”

“... Should’ve expected the honeypot.” I closed my eyes and shook my head, blinking a few times. “Gods-be-damned…”

Amaretta let ‘me’ go and held onto my shoulders. “It’s really nothing personal, Suede. I promise.”

“... How the fuck are you going to bait me through Bite-Back and then turn around and do it for the Rangers? Are you just making this shit up?” I stared into her eyes.

“I’m not just,”Three, “feeding you fodder,” Two,“here tall, dark,”One, “and cute.” Amaretto said poutily. ‘Can we buck already? I will beg you, dammit!’

I blinked. “So you were really checking to see if I was a rapist by telling me that it was okay to rape you?” I asked slowly.

‘Didn’t we already cover this? Orders are orders!’ “That’s what I’m saying, yes.” She
huffed.

“And the Maud thing?”

‘Double Agent life for the win, am I right? Checking loyalties for both sides! Ha!’ “It’s
complicated like that, Suede.”

I took a moment to think about how Furladra had lead me cock-first into danger and shrugged off everything. I stopped giving a fuck. Nothing mattered anymore. “Whatever. Wanna start over with some decent foreplay?”

“I’m actually really into being choked and slapped. Just don’t hit me again, please.”
Amaretta requested, smiling and giving me a little wink.

I looked at my right hand and back to Amaretta’s face. “I’ve never regretted having long fingers, and now’s one of the times where they’re handy.” I walked my fingers up her chest, starting at her sternum while my other hand groped her thigh, the pliant combination of musculature under a nice layer of cushion was heaven for my hands.

With Amaretta’s throat between my thumb and forefinger so It wouldn’t suck as bad, I pushed her down and propped myself up just enough to lock lips with her, and much to my surprise, her lips tasted like almond butter. She let her freakishly long Pony tongue flood my mouth, and whereas with Maud I’d told her to never do it twice, I can’t say that I gave the ‘T’ out of a single shit; not even an actual pile of shit, just the word. I wrestled with Amaretta’s mouth muscle and her her struggle to breathe, though I heard and felt that she wasn’t close to blacking out. Most of the rumours I’d heard about people who liked to be choked ended with the fact that they liked to be choked near to death, so I figured that keeping Amaretta on a constant strain rather than choking the life out of her would be the better course of action.

Between the snogging and Amaretta’s stroking of my rod, I was ready to go again in just a handful of moments. Once I was as hard as I was going to get for the time being, or at least as hard as Amaretta wanted me, She gripped the helmet of my cock with her thumb and forefinger, leading me into her quim readily. I followed her lead patiently, increasing the pressure on her throat as she pulled at me hard enough to hurt. I didn’t care. I wanted to make the experience worthwhile for at least one of us, so when Amaretta’s hand went from my member to the hand that was strangling her, I let her go and stabbed my sword into her sheath mercilessly. Her tightness was incredible; the undulations of her inner walls simply bliss incarnate as she climaxed beneath me, struggling to moan and breathe at the same time.

She cried out for Celestia for some odd reason and begged me to continue in as few breaths as she could, so I waited for her to inhale one more time before reclaiming her throat. The next three thrusts were slow since I’d actually hurt myself a little by being so rough with Amaretta, but her sex felt too divine for me to simply give up. No, I soldiered on as my partner wrapped her sumptuous legs around me and kept me from pulling all the way out of her. After say, three or so minutes, she’d finally gotten used to my girth (It’s not long, it’s fat.) and I was able to bring her to another climax, having taken multiple breaks from choking her so she could cum in peace. It’s sad to say that I clearly recall feeling nothing other than the mild desire to fuck her brains out and the ache in my heart while I picked up the pace, but that’s neither here nor there.

At the twenty minute mark, Amaretta’s breathing was ragged enough that I didn’t have to have my hand around her throat for her to have trouble breathing because I’d fucked her through every orgasm she’d had since, but I was nowhere close to being satisfied. I eventually decided to slow down around five or six minutes after I realized that I probably wasn’t going to get off anytime soon, but as I tried to slide out of Amaretta, she held me in place with her legs and begged pitifully for me not to leave her just yet. Instead of doing what I didn’t feel like doing in the first place, I went with something I rather hoped would help me feel anything other than hurt. I propped myself up and got my knees underneath me, lifting Amaretta as I went so I wouldn't break my little friend. She groaned and shakily rose to hug me, holding me tight as we were joined by the loins.

Once I was supporting her by her thigh, I gave her a few more gentle thrusts and she let out a low moan. “Oh my gosh~ Suede, are we going for round… Whatever?” Amaretta inquired dreamily.

“Can you keep going?” I asked.

“If I say no, are you gonna take it out?”

“Not if you don't want me to. We’ll go to sleep and I’ll leave it in.”

“That sounds lovely, Love.” She rested her head against me, her arms wrapped around my neck.

“I’m going to need you to unwrap your legs, Lover-Girl.” I said gently, though I noticed something.

My voice sounded like Maud’s.

“Sure thing Sweetie~ Oh, I’m gonna cook you the best breakfast ever~!”

She didn’t let go of me with her legs, so I had to say something. “We can lay down when you let me go, Lover.”

Amaretta sighed and let her legs drop, so I pivoted and laid down with her on my chest. It was a comfortable position to be sure, but I wasn’t feeling any better with her on top of me. There was a question on my mind, but Amaretta said, “Goodnight, Suede. We’ll start tomorrow or whatever.”

“Amaretta:”

“Yes, Love~?” She asked sweetly.

“Why did you want me?”

“Because I did, Sillyhead~ You’re too special to pass up!”

“Right.” I answered, completely and totally apathetic.