//------------------------------// // Chapter 2 // Story: A Royal Canterlot Wedding: Deleted Scenes // by Raugos //------------------------------// A Royal Canterlot Wedding: Deleted Scenes (Chapter 2) Tufty wasn’t sure which she liked less – strangling herself, or listening to Princess Mi Amore Cadenza rattle on about this and that. It was past ten o’clock, and the pink alicorn had suddenly taken an interest in the security of the palace grounds at night. It didn’t seem entirely necessary, since that Bludgeon guy and his three buddies had gotten back that afternoon from the scouting mission. They’d reported a small battle with some timber wolves – nothing to get worked up about. But the pink alicorn had insisted, and since Princess Luna was watching over the palace grounds and Hammer and Anvil were out on patrol, it had fallen to Tufty and Hay Bale to show her around. They were trotting down the main corridors with the alicorn in the middle and the two Night Guard trainees on either side. “ – and it would be beneficial if we could have more guards around here at night,” Cadence advised, glancing at the sentries standing at their posts. “It’s dreadfully quiet – what if we are attacked? Can the rest of the guards wake up in time?” Princess Cadence had been making complaints of that nature pretty much right from the beginning. Patrol patterns and schedules, lighting, fortifications or locking mechanisms – it didn’t matter how mundane. And whenever she did find something positive to say, Tufty couldn’t quite shake the feeling that it sounded completely insincere. And her laugh – it was simpering, tittering, annoying. Tufty nodded and agreed with her whenever possible, but inside, she was pulling her mane out. She suddenly felt really sorry for Captain Shining Armour. Seriously, has he even met her? “Well… we can wake a few more guards and send them on patrol, if that would put you at ease,” she suggested. The pink alicorn nodded. “Do that.” Dooo thaaat… Tufty rolled her eyes. It was immature, but she couldn’t help it. It was either that, or buck somepony in the flank. Speaking of which… Baley was being remarkably unhelpful – she’d not said much at all the entire time. Tufty made sure that the princess’ attention was somewhere else, then glanced over her back and saw her fellow guard trotting along blithely, as if their little tour was not disagreeable in the least. How could she stand it? Then, she spotted the little wire going into her ear, and the entire mystery was solved just like that. She scowled at the oblivious earth mare. The princess suddenly stopped. “Well, I must leave you now.” She smiled. “Thank you so very much for showing me around the palace and how everything works.” There was that feeling again. She almost sounded more… gleeful than grateful. “You’re welcome, Your Highness,” Baley replied. As if you were doing all the work… She offered a smile to the pink alicorn. “If there is anything else, don’t hesitate to send for us, Princess.” The alicorn nodded graciously. “Oh, I will. And now, I must go to see my husband-to-be.” She spread her wings and flew off into the night, making for the apartments where the Captain made his dwelling. When she was out of earshot, Tufty rounded on Baley. “Wow, thanks for all the support back there.” The earth pony was still watching the princess, head bobbing slightly. Tufty frowned and used a spell to pluck the earbud out of the mare’s ear. Baley looked surprised for a second, then grinned sheepishly when she saw her. “Are you listening to that rock stuff again? You know we aren’t allowed to do that when we’re on duty!” Baley sounded apologetic enough, but was largely unfazed. “Sorry, desperate times call for desperate measures – she was going to drive me nuts. Besides, that tour we gave doesn’t really count as duty, I think.” She paused for a moment, then added, “Oh, and it’s country, this time. I’ve lent my rock CDs to Princess Luna.” “You what?” That seemed… inappropriate, somehow. Her companion shrugged. “She actually asked me, not the other way around.” Tufty shook her head. “Never mind – back to work.” * * * * * Dawn was almost upon them. They were in the old cellars, where part of the palace’s stock of food was kept. The place was roughly cubical in shape, connected to the rest of the palace by a disused flight of stairs that led up to the kitchens. It was dark, humid, and the stonework floor right at the back was covered in a thin, black layer of grime. There were no cobwebs, but Rax did get a glimpse of lichen growing in a few patches here and there. Even with the lamp they’d brought along, the place had an air of solitude and abandonment. And… it was now officially Rax’s favourite spot in Canterlot. It was as close to the hive as any equine place could get. He was pacing around as he and Scritch waited for their sisters and Queen Chrysalis to arrive. He hoped that they were done with setbacks for the day – when they’d tried to enter the city, he’d accidentally smashed his face against that pink bubble, which felt smooth as glass and hard as stone. In retrospect, he probably should have tested it with a leg first, instead of trying to act normal and fly through it like some of the pegasi he’d seen. Luckily for them, some rainbow-maned pegasus who had been flying laps around the city had noticed and told Shining Armour, who later apologised and said that he was still working out the kinks in his barrier spell. Of course, Rax and the others hadn’t bothered to mention that it was working perfectly fine. Have they gotten lost? Since they all wore the guises of pony guards, it was only natural that they were assigned duties as everyone else. Mandy and Chitin had been separated from Rax and Scritch, but prior to that, they had all received word from their queen to meet here, in the cellars. And his sisters were late – their watch should have been over fifteen minutes ago. Whilst pondering whether he should go searching for them, the door atop the stairs creaked open, and two armoured pegasi stallions crept in and glided down the steps. “Where have you been?” Rax hissed. “You’re late!” “Sorry,” Chitin mumbled, averting her eyes. It was a little amusing to see that grubbing demeanour in a fully grown pegasus, especially since she spoke using the stallion’s deep voice. Mandy, on the other hoof, was unrepentant. She rolled her eyes at their sister and turned to Rax, saying, “I go where I want, when I want. You’re not my overseer.” Rax’s wings twitched. “But Skeehar is, and she’s made me the leader of this operation. So you’d better do what I say, or else…” Mandy tilted her head and raised her eyebrows in mock curiosity. “Oh, do tell! What are you going to do?” He glared at his sister and growled, “It’s not what I’ll do that you have to worry about; if the overseer gets word of how you disobeyed orders, she will – ” “Call you a useless larva for not keeping her in line?” Scritch helpfully suggested. That was probably true… Rax scowled at his brother. “Whose side are you on?” he demanded. “The sweeter side.” Rax blinked. “What?” Scritch grinned and inclined his head towards Mandy, who tossed a little brown bag to him. The changeling caught it, reached in and plucked out a grainy white cube, which he proceeded to pop into his mouth. Rax looked back at his sisters and noticed that one of Chitin’s cheeks was bulging a little. He looked back at Scritch, who now had an expression of sheer, unadulterated bliss on his face. Rax sniffed the air, and then realised what his siblings were all munching on – Mandy and Chitin had gone to the kitchens to pilfer some sugar cubes. Sugar. Pure, refined, cut-into-perfect-bite-sized-chunks sugar. Much to his annoyance, his mouth started watering – stupid pony anatomy and their stupid bodily functions. But… his body reminded him that he’d not had nourishment in quite a while, and… sugar… Mandy smirked and held another little brown bag tantalisingly in front of him. “Want some? It’s good stuff.” He lifted a hoof, but she suddenly whipped it out of reach and slipped it into a saddlebag. “Actually, on second thought… you were being rather mean to me…” she mused. I hate you… Rax felt a glob of drool trickle down to his chin. Chitin was giggling, and Scritch was outright guffawing at the no doubt undignified sight he presented. He lunged at Mandy, but she deftly hopped out of the way and hovered above him. “I might be persuaded to give you some, if you repeat after me: I, Thorax…” He didn’t want to, but it was like he no longer had control over his speech. “I, Thorax…” “… Would like to apologise to my dear sister, Mandible…” Would like to stuff you into a barrel… “… Would like to apologise to my dear sister, Mandible…” “… And confess that I love her as a big brother and best friend, forever.” And blast you to the bottom of the ocean… He tried to resist, but then she waved the little bag above him again, and even had the audacity to take out a sugar cube and give it a slow, ponderous, noisy lick. Sugar… His lips quivered. “… And confess that I love her as a big brother and best friend, forever.” “Okay, since you asked so nicely.” Mandy chuckled and tossed him his share of the sugar cubes. I hate myself... But such thoughts disappeared when he chomped down on a cube and felt it crumble and melt into chunks and sticky puddles of pure sweetness. It was immeasurably refreshing – the sugar went straight to his brain and muscles, firing up his senses and restoring his energy. “There will be retribution,” he warned Mandy as he munched. There was no way he was going to let this one slide. His sister stuck a tongue out at him in response. True to her word, the queen came just as the sun rose, a little while after they’d finished their pilfered treats. The door glowed green and swung open, admitting the soft yellow light of sunrise, followed by the dark silhouette of the alicorn shape that she was wearing. Her shadow danced across the walls as she gracefully descended the steps and entered the vicinity of the flickering lamp’s light. She seemed very pleased with herself. “Ah, my children, it is nice to see you. Is everything in place?” They bowed. “Yes, Mother,” Rax answered. “The supplies came in last night, just as you commanded.” “You ordered quite a lot,” Scritch noted. The queen nodded. “There are a lot of guards.” She then gestured towards the great stack of barrels in the humid cellar and continued, “Well, waste no more time. I have made certain that no one will disturb us – give them some flavour!” Rax closed his eyes and willed the transformation – it was slower than the usual flash of green light, since they had all opted for the gradual, more complete transformation that could fool ponies even when they came into physical contact. The quick ones were more illusory than actual transformations and had been too risky for the task at hoof, besides costing actual magic – the slower way was more natural. He felt the hairs retreat into his body, his skin harden until it became his proper carapace, felt his teeth sharpen and lengthen to their usual pointy proportions, and his horn poked out and grew to its normal length and shape. He then buzzed his wings experimentally. Ah, better. Once restored to their true forms, they stripped off their royal guard armour and began their task. Rax pried the lid off a barrel and held his foreleg over it, waiting patiently as he willed his glands to produce resin. Thick, green fluid oozed out of the pores, and he shook his foreleg to dislodge them. About five or six globs went into the barrel, and he replaced the lid and began working on the next one. It was quickly done, with their queen there to help them shift the heavy barrels with her powerful magic. Before an hour was gone, every single barrel was laced with a little ‘gift’ for anyone who drank. Queen Chrysalis stepped back to admire their work and chuckled gleefully. “I’ll order the servants to distribute them shortly. Oh, those fools won’t know what hit them! When this is over, the four of you will get first choice in picking your prey.” “I like the sound of that!” Mandy grinned. Queen Chrysalis' smile was delightfully nasty. “This day is going to be perfect!” Chitin buzzed her assent. “Oh yeah, you know it, Mom!” * * * * * “Miss Sparkle, is something the matter?” Hay Bale asked. They were posted at the outer doors of the throne room, where the wedding rehearsal was taking place. Princess Cadence had gone in several minutes ago, along with the captain, Princess Celestia, and five of the Elements of Harmony. And now the sixth one had arrived… The purple unicorn standing in front of them looked like she was an inch away from frothing at the mouth. Her eyes were a little red, and she looked like she had not slept a wink that night. In fact, the way the morning rays of the sun were falling on her, with the shadows and all, she looked like the sort that would bite your head off if you spoke to them before they got their morning coffee. “Is something the matter?” she snapped, “Yes, yes, I would think so! Haven’t you been listening to what I’ve told you? There is something wrong with Princess Cadence – you guys need to help me!” “Woah, slow down,” Baley soothed. “I know that the princess can be a little… difficult, but what makes you so sure we should stop the wedding? Isn’t this the captain’s decision?” The unicorn groaned in frustration. “Ugh, I see that nopony is going to believe me. Fine, I’m going in myself!” Tufty stepped in front of the mare and put a hoof on her shoulder. “Look, why don’t you take a couple of minutes to cool down or something? They – ” Oh, horse apples. The Element of Magic had stomped forward until they’d practically bumped noses and stared her right in the eyes – it killed the words before they could even leave Tufty’s mouth. That glare… it promised sheer and utter doom to anypony who stood in her way. And right now, it was aimed at her. She could have sworn those pupils were pure red a second ago – she would never have suspected that such a pleasant-mannered mare could harbour such… such wrath. Tufty gave her an awkward smile and quickly hopped out of the way. “Uh, on second thought, go right in. He is your brother, after all.” When Twilight Sparkle had trudged past them and slammed the doors shut, Tufty slumped and released the breath that she had been holding. “The captain’s going to have a pretty interesting family,” Baley noted. “Yeah…” They hadn’t tied the knot yet, and it already looked like his sister and bride were going to be at each other’s throats – an alicorn versus the Element of Magic, no less. She rubbed her forehead and groaned – they should have been in bed by now, but with the wedding so close and everypony’s anxieties running high, they’d decided to pull another shift and stay up throughout the day. And if the purple unicorn’s behaviour was any indicator, it was going to be a long, long one. They spent the next several minutes in watchful silence, until it was broken by the doors bursting open, and a sobbing Princess Cadence ran down the corridor and out the entrance without so much as a glance back. “ – and if I don’t stop you, you’re going to ruin my brother’s life!” Twilight Sparkle’s voice rang out. Tufty’s eyes widened, as did her companion’s. They peered round the corner and saw the purple unicorn bump into her elder brother. Captain Shining Armour looked like he was having… one of those moments. “Uh oh,” Hay Bale said. “Yup.” They quickly stopped peeking and went back to their posts, content to mind their own business as the tongue lashing began. They were pretty far back, but Shining Armour’s voice could really carry his words far. “ – in fact, I wouldn’t show up to the wedding at all!” the captain finished. Baley whistled. He really pulled his bucks, though. Shining Armour could really dish out a verbal assault when he felt like it – Twilight Sparkle was lucky that she was his sister, or it could have been a lot worse for her. They stood stock still as the groom, the new bridesmaids, and Princess Celestia trotted out and after the pink alicorn. Tufty noted that even the sun princess was ticked off… that sort of thing happened only when, well, when something really ticked her off. Her famed student must have really blown it to have put her in such a mood. The minutes ticked by, but nopony else entered or left the throne room. After almost an hour had passed, Tufty felt sufficiently concerned that she needed to take a look. Baley tagged along. The throne room was empty, and a quick search told them that nopony was hiding anywhere. “What happened here?” Baley wondered aloud. Tufty turned and saw her fellow guard hoofing at a circle of scorch marks on the carpet, just at the base of the dais. “Maybe somepony really lost it,” she suggested. “My cousin once saw a unicorn set himself on fire when he got angry enough.” Or maybe she just teleported. Some unicorns could do that – and it left annoying burn marks all over the place. It would explain the absence of the purple unicorn, too. Something growled. Tufty whipped her head back up, ears cocked and eyes scanning her surroundings for trouble, but she only found Hay Bale standing there, looking guilty. “Umm, you hungry? I could use some breakfast.” Tufty snorted. “Yeah, when our watch is over.” Barely a second later, she yawned and mumbled, “I wouldn’t say no to coffee.” * * * * * Princess Luna was not impressed with her new niece. Oh, she had been excited enough to learn that another alicorn had been born whilst she was away, and when Princess Cadence finally visited Canterlot, she had been amongst the first to greet her. That went well enough; the young one was sweet towards Shining Armour and Tia, if a little haughty towards everypony else. That in itself was little cause for concern, but it wasn’t until Luna had an actual confrontation with her that she was forced to revise her assessment of the pink alicorn. “I just want a little security for my wedding, is that so much to ask?” Princess Cadence bemoaned. “What’s so difficult about sending a few patrols further out?” Luna surveyed the faces of everypony else in the council chambers; her personal guards, Hammer and Anvil, plus Sergeant Arrow were all wearing expressions of varying degrees of incredulity, from near-indifference to outright disbelief, in that order. She was more inclined to the latter. Truly, Niece, this is the reason you have summoned us away from sleep? It was well into the morning, and she had been just about to tuck herself in for the day when a guard had come running, bearing orders for her Night Guards to come to an urgent meeting regarding Canterlot’s safety, directly from Cadence herself. Luna had followed, partly out of curiosity, and partly out of annoyance that her niece had presumed authority over her guards. “But, Princess,” Sergeant Arrow protested, effectively bringing Luna back to the present, “what would be the point of it? Bludgeon has confirmed that he’d overreacted – he was attacked by some timber wolves, and they’d already driven them off. There’s nothing that we need to go out looking for, especially not as far as the marshes.” “Don’t argue – you have your orders,” Shining Armour said. “But, Sir…” “Go. Send your best flyers.” Arrow looked like he had been about to say more, but stifled at the hard look on his superior’s face and briskly saluted him before speeding off to make the necessary preparations. The other two grey pegasi, on the other hoof, remained still, apparently deep in thought. “What are you two waiting for?” Shining Armour demanded irritably, “Get going!” Her guards were largely unfazed. Anvil tentatively put a hoof up. “Ah, if you don’t mind my asking, what would be the point of sending battle-ready guards so far out of the city? Simple scouts would suffice for this purpose.” “In any case, we would better serve here, should any attack occur,” Hammer agreed. Cadence batted her eyelashes at them in an overtly flirtatious manner. “Oh, but I can’t rest easy until I was certain that only Canterlot’s finest were on the job!” Anvil looked like he was expecting Shining Armour to shoot lightning at him or some such, but nothing of the sort happened. Luna was surprised that Cadence would flirt publicly, and in front of her future husband, no less! Strange that Shining Armour seemed oblivious to the deed, but she was happy to note that her guards were not taken in by her honeyed words. “Ah… that is very flattering, Your Highness. But that does not change our stance on this – we would be wasted out there, if you truly believe that there is an impending threat.” Luna was inclined to agree. “Anvil speaks true. There would be no – ” “Excuse me,” Cadence cut her off, “but this is a matter for the Captain of the Royal Guard to decide.” Luna stiffened at the rude interruption, but the pink alicorn had already turned her attention to the captain. “Dear, would you please talk some sense into them?” Shining Armour rubbed his forehead with a hoof and regarded the pegasi with growing impatience. “Look, I know that Princess Celestia has given you two special treatment on the grounds of being close friends of Her Royal Highness…” here, he inclined his head to Luna, “ – but you serve Canterlot, and right now, you are needed to keep watch out there, so start acting like soldiers and follow your orders! If you can’t do as you’re told, you might as well wear dresses like all the pretty court ladies and go to the wedding instead, and I’ll give the job to somepony less insubordinate!” Again, the two big pegasi weren’t intimidated by the display. “Unless you intend to have the guests die laughing, you might want to seek alternatives,” Hammer deadpanned. “Speak for yourself,” Anvil piped up. “I might look rather fetching in a dress, I’ll have you know.” He put a hoof to his chin and glanced down at his chest. “Hmm… which would go better with my coat – pink, or yellow?” “Shame would look better on you,” Hammer replied. His fellow guard chuckled. “Are you certain? That sounded more like jealousy.” Shining Armour looked like he was having a difficult time deciding whether to be disgusted, amused or infuriated – or all three at once. Luna giggled, and Cadence glared at her. She quickly stopped herself – it was probably time to step in before her guards drove the two lovers insane. As much as she disapproved of Cadence’s behaviour, and appreciated the gesture of support from her guards through their insubordination towards her niece for that earlier insult, she was still a princess. “Hammer, Anvil, that is enough,” she commanded. “If they earnestly believe that it is for the good of all, then, by all means, go. Is that understood?” They bowed, dark armour glinting in the light of the morning sun, and said in unison, “We serve.” Luna dismissed them with a sweep of her wing, and watched as they trotted off towards the barracks to catch up with Sergeant Arrow. When they were gone, she turned back and saw Cadence whispering something in Shining Armour’s ear. The stallion seemed oddly glassy-eyed, and as she looked on, he suddenly groaned and rubbed his horn. “Shining Armour,” she began, “are you certain that you wish to maintain the barrier on your own? There are many around you who would be willing to help, myself included.” The white stallion shook his head in apology. “I’m sorry, Your Highness, but the spell is very complicated, and I wouldn’t dream of asking you to help in such a menial task.” Luna frowned. “Complicated? I have examined your spell – it is hardly more than a magnified protection ward; difficult to maintain only because of its size.” “There’s no need to worry about this, he has everything under control,” Cadence replied. She flared her horn, and a greenish wave of magic flowed to the stallion’s own. Shining Armour grimaced a little, but sighed when the magic subsided and smiled at his bride. “Thanks, dear. I needed that.” With that said, he bowed to Luna and took his leave. Cadence began trotting after him, but Luna called out, “Niece, a word with you, if you please.” The pink alicorn turned around, and Luna caught sight of a flash of annoyance on her face. “What is it?” Cadence asked brusquely. To begin with, your manners leave much to be desired. “Cadence, you should know better than to flirt with ponies other than your future husband. I can easily swear to Hammer and Anvil to silence, but others might see it as an opportunity for gossip, or worse, blackmail. You are a princess, and should know better.” The pink alicorn nodded and began to turn away, but Luna tapped on the floor with a hoof. “I am not finished. I do not appreciate the way in which you have assumed authority over my guards – over all the guards, in fact. As you so kindly reminded me earlier, Shining Armour is the captain, and using your relationship to order them around on your every whim is unbecoming for a princess. What you do here in Canterlot is going to reflect on everypony else, especially Celestia.” Cadence scoffed. “And you would know all about whims, wouldn’t you?” “Explain…” Luna said, eyes narrowing. “Oh, I’m sorry, weren’t you the one who, on a whim, decided to plunge Equestria into eternal night?” Cadence tossed her mane and continued, “And didn’t you try again when you came back from your holiday on the moon?” She stiffened again. “It was not that simple; Tia and I – ” “Come to think of it, it is rather odd that everypony is so trusting of you, considering what you tried to do last year.” Cadence let out a little gasp. “And, oh my, didn’t you say earlier that you were good at swearing ponies to silence?” “Don’t you dare insu – ” “And who’s to say you won’t try a third time? Does Aunt Celestia really trust you that much?” Luna was dumbstruck – was her niece actually questioning her loyalty to her subjects? It was unthinkable! The pink alicorn looked at her with lazy, condescending, half-lidded eyes, and said with all the self-assured smugness of a seven-year-old filly speaking to a two-year-old, “I know it’s hard adjusting to a world that’s moved on without you, but maybe you should think about what you’ve done before trying to advise others about what they should or should not do.” Luna opened her mouth to retort, but only inarticulate sounds came out. Her niece gave her an infuriatingly sweet smile and trotted off, leaving her alone in the council chambers. She stood there in the silence for several minutes, stopping only when a gust of wind blew in through the window and reminded her where she was. With an angry snort, she closed her eyes and teleported to the south wing of the palace. She popped back into the world with a tiny explosion of blue smoke, startling a couple of palace servants before she began trudging towards her quarters in the tower. “Err… Your Highness, is there anything you need?” one of the servants tentatively asked. Fetch me a halberd; your princess wishes to have some... fun. “No – leave me be,” she growled. The servants quickly retreated. She had been able to keep her emotions under control several moments ago – but now, the simmering heat was beginning to boil over. Princess Cadence… she has no idea… To presume that she knew everything that was to be known about the Eternal Night… the resentment that her subjects loved Tia but feared Luna, the hurt when she thought that her friends had abandoned her, the confusion and fear when her emotions caused her magic to spiral out of control… and worst of all, she remembered that she had liked being Nightmare Moon. As much as she deserved punishment for the harm she had wrought all those centuries ago, she had paid for it with a thousand years of solitude – time enough for the resentment and loneliness to fester and turn into irrational hatred, selfishness, delusional arrogance… and yes, cruelty, even. It had taken all of the Elements of Harmony to bring her back, but the memories remained. And if she dug deep enough, she was certain the feelings would be there as well, just waiting to resurface, perhaps even to consume her once again. You know nothing of the shadows that haunt me, Little Niece… Now that she was alone and away from judging eyes, she could feel her temper fraying. It would feel good to lash out at something… but she quickly reined those thoughts in – the last time she had allowed her emotions to get the best of her, it had resulted in a thousand-year sojourn to the moon. Then the thought came unbidden, that perhaps Cadence could do with a week or two on the moon to learn some humility. It was only after turning her thoughts to more pleasant memories, namely, her experience in Ponyville in the latter half of Nightmare Night that she began to calm down. Luna had her temper firmly under a lid by the time she made it back to her room, but she was hardly keen to make an appearance at Cadence’s wedding anymore. It was petty, admittedly, but after that insult, she was not going to grace Princess Cadence’s marriage with her presence. She swept past the guards by her door and said, “I will not be attending the wedding, and I do not wish to be disturbed. But should there be an emergency, you have my leave to intrude and inform me so.” * * * * * “What kind of apple cider is this?” Hay Bale asked with a quizzical frown as she inspected the contents of her flagon. “The colour looks kinda off.” The palace servant shrugged and passed another flagon of the stuff to a guard who was passing by. “Beats me. Princess Mi Amore Cadenza says that it’s the finest brew, all the way from Appleloosa, and she has personally ordered it for everypony in the Guard as a token of appreciation.” Awfully generous of her. There were barrels of it sitting around in the mess hall – servants were filling out mugs and offering them to the guards, and she could see some of them carting off more of the stuff to distribute to those who were on duty elsewhere. Although… Tufty had to agree with Baley. The cider did look a little odd – more opaque than what she was used to. After taking a sip, her fellow guard shrugged and proceeded to chug it down. “Well, maybe she wasn’t so bad after all,” she commented. Tufty took a sip and snorted. “You’d forgive anypony who gives you something for free.” The cider was unusually sweet, and it had a weird aftertaste. She couldn’t put her hoof on it, but it tasted almost… waxy. Not that she’d ever tried candlewax, but the smell was kind of similar. It also seemed a bit thicker than normal. The pony who brewed this particular batch must have been a little tipsy when he was about his business… She was just about to ask Baley if she noticed the strange taste, but instead found her having a second round. Guess it’s not a problem. But then again, Baley was okay with a lot of stuff that everypony else would’ve had issues with. “You really like it, huh?” The earth mare wiped froth off her mouth with a foreleg and belched noisily. “I’m thirsty, and I need something to wash down all those hay sandwiches.” * * * * * It was all coming together very nicely. After going round giving all of their fellow guards a drink or two, Rax and his siblings had decided to move outside of the palace grounds, where they could watch and wait without hassle, disguised as regular ponies instead of royal guards. It was also a good reason to get rid of the weighty armour. The swarm should be on the move by now, and in spite of the pointlessly huge number of scouts and sentries that ‘Princess Cadence’ had ordered to keep watch over the countryside, key patrols had already been replaced with their own kind, allowing them to advance through the thick forests without so much as a squeak of alarm from any pegasus sentries. He glanced up towards the towering structure of the royal palace, where Queen Chrysalis was preying on the captain’s energy, then shifted his gaze to the guard ponies around the gates to the palace grounds. Poor fools didn’t realise that their world was just about to come crashing down around their ears. Why the guards were required to stand stock still and silent as rocks was beyond Rax; it wasn’t as if they were trying to hide or anything. But he did smile when he noticed that they were slowly finding it harder and harder to act like statues – some shifted in discomfort every now and then; some were sweating, and some appeared to be doing their utmost to suppress a grimace. He chuckled. Rax had kept a watchful eye on all of the guards in their vicinity, making sure he’d counted all of them, taking note of where they all were. The order to attack would come soon, and it would be good to know which ponies were capable of fighting. Roughly nine out of ten had drunk their special complimentary apple cider – so it was the remainders that he had to look out for. “Are we going to fight all of them?” Chitin asked. “Just the ones that haven’t drunk anything,” he replied. “That’s what I meant. All of them?” “Don’t be such a grub,” Mandy sneered, “It’ll be easy pickings!” “Yes, even Thorax should be able to handle one,” Scritch added. After a pause, he added, “On second thought, you might want to help watch his back – his peripheral vision is awful.” Rax was about to shoot back an insult, but at that moment a little gust picked up, coming vaguely from the direction of the palace. Something tickled his senses, and he took in a deep breath – and started grinning. His heart began to pound, his breathing quickened, and he began to have difficulty standing still, itching to start thrashing and fighting. He bounced on his hooves, barely able to contain his excitement, and his siblings were doing much the same. Queen Chrysalis had released the combat pheromones – it was the signal to swarm. He saw Mandy baring her fangs – her disguise was already slipping away in her anticipation of some good, old-fashioned violence. “Let it begin!” she snarled. Let it begin, indeed. Some of the pony bystanders were giving them funny looks, but Rax didn’t care. Soon enough, those ponies will have much bigger things to worry about. * * * * * “Uh, Baley, can you hold the fort for a moment? I think I need to go to the bathroom.” The earth mare looked with concern. “You okay? You look a little green.” There was a twinge in Tufty’s lower gut. She nodded. “I’m fine; I just need to go, really bad.” Hay Bale gave her a push. “Well, gosh, go on – don’t try to hold it in like that!” She snapped her thanks and dashed off as quickly as she could, trying not to jostle her stomach too much. A shiver ran through her, and she picked up the pace, ignoring the looks she was getting from passers-by, and the scolding from those whom she barged aside in her haste to get to the restrooms. The first one she went to was full – there was a whole line of ponies waiting to enter, and they all looked like they had equally urgent business, so asking if they could kindly let her cut the line was out of the question. That was okay; she could go to another. Her guts gurgled as she galloped to the next nearest one, and she gritted her teeth when she felt a bowel movement. Bad bad bad bad bad! Shop houses and mansions were little more than a blur as she galloped full tilt, and she nearly crashed into somepony’s back in her blind rush. She skidded to a halt and could have sworn that her hooves were smoking, but that wasn’t her biggest concern right now. Her jaw dropped when she saw twenty or so ponies lined up at this restroom as well. Oddly enough… they were all royal guards, and come to think of it, so had been everypony at the other restroom. These guys all looked equally desperate; their spears lay forgotten on the ground by their sides as the hopped and fidgeted and squirmed in place. Something wasn’t right. That was still okay – there was another restroom nearby. But just then, another shiver ran through her body, and she squirmed in her armour and tried to squeeze her legs together. There was no way she could run any further without an… accident. Nooooo! What had she done to deserve this? Tufty really felt like dropping onto the floor and lifting her hooves to the sky and wailing in despair. On second thought, she felt it was justified. She dropped onto the floor and lifted her hooves to the sky, wailing in despair, “Nooooo!”