//------------------------------// // chapter 13: blood-ties (slice of cake because life machine broke) // Story: Bamboozled again! // by Theboxcatgamr //------------------------------// The ride was boring and with me still being trapped in stone and in a cage I didn't really have a choice but to eavesdrop on the guards and a conversation I really shouldn't have listened to. Some girl with a slight accent was still morning his kid that was taken as a little colt. I probably shouldn't have tried to comfort her yet but I knew it was the right thing to do. "Dude that's harsh" She simply nodded and instead of telling me to shut up or something she said two names through the tears: Théodore and abel My jaw dropped. I needed to be sure so I asked where Abel was from, she hesitated and said prance. mind blown I deadpanned and just straight up said France. The wagon came to a sudden stop and the mare turned around. I continued with a description of my friend from the junkyard "Tall, gray hair, early forties, battle medic?" She threw open the cage and demanded how I knew. She then finally saw what I was. And went wide eyed. "Because Abel was a close friend of mine who lost his child to a freak storm" The other guard was getting impatient and telling us to hurry up, completely ignorant to what was happening. She returned to a stoic expression after and returned to the front. And I just assumed that she left the cage unlocked on purpose. On the way to the city I told her how life was going for the guy she cracked a smile when I mentioned how he still was always looking for something. Guess I know now. I asked for her name and she said sky blue. I asked if she adopted. She said yes... Twice. She then went into a sob story about how they couldn't afford to have two children and so they put one up for adoption. She said it was here that the storm proceeded to take both kids away. We then arrived at the castle and I was still trying to process how this happened. A day passed and after a bit I heard she sound of jingling keys. It was blueblood. He came to my cell and unlocked the doors, he told me about what happened with the sisters getting him a psychiatrist. He almost believed it was all fake until Clyde finally spoke up. So Clyde was with blueblood for a bit. "so how did it go on your end?" "I made a few friends and even found the prick from last time" Blueblood started smiling and Clyde gave me a hug. Nice "Ok so should we try to convince sun butt that I'm not evil or wait a bit?" Blueblood giggled a bit at the name. On the way to the throne room I asked blueblood a question "Hey why don't you have a last name blueblood?" "oh I do I just never use my first name because it seemed a bit odd to the other nobles" My breathing quickened "What is your first name?" "Théodore" HOLY FUCK why? "When you get some spare time could you do me a favour?" He tilted his head In curiosity and nodded "If you see a guard by the name of sky blue could you say your first name to her?" He asked why and I said that the mare was someone he might know. We finally arrived at the room and I knocked on the ridiculously oversized doors, the doors opened slowly and dramatically until about halfway when we all pushed through. We entered the room and Celestia swiftly threw something behind her and wiped off her face. There was a silence in the room deafening everyone as nither Celestia nor us moved a muscle as it to let everything that had just happened sink in. The object she threw was slowly sliding down the wall and eventually the thick slab of cake halted the silence and got the floor near Celestia's throne all sticky. We slowly left the room and reentered after a few minutes everything was clean and I was almost ready for my speech, I just needed Luna. I could tell that Celestia was stalling for time "Hi." She gave me a look that just screamed unsettled. "Would it be possible for this conversation to end WITHOUT turning me to stone?" She was visibly sweating. The fuck? It was around the three minute mark that I was concerned that something was wrong "Ok I'm getting concerned"(RIGHT ON THE MARK)"are you ok? I hope this isn't about that dark magic issue again" I took a few steps backwards to give her some space (despite being a good twenty feet away) and bumped into Théodore (he has a name and I'm going to use it) and Luna finally entered the room. Celestia was looking at her with hope. Before Celestia could say anything Luna shut her mouth with her magic and gave me a wave over after pulling up some chairs. "Ok so sorry Luna but instead of picking up where we left off I need to start again for Celestia. You see it all began when I was bor-" DODO-DODODO, HUBUDUBUH DO-DO DODODO, HUBUDUBUH, DODO-DODODODODO-DODODO-DO-DODODODO-DO-DO-DO- AHEM sorry about that. Anyway I finished the story about the curse and they raised an eyebrow when I said it was death himself. Luckily for me I got a glimpse of death through the reflection on the glassy floor "I SEE YOU YOU FUCKING FUCK!" Death dropped from the ceiling and sprinted out of the room. "DONT YOU FUCKING RUN AWAY FROM ME!" I ran after him and grabbed a broomstick in the corner, I managed to bludgeon him in the head and when he did his usual escape I managed to grab his cloak only to reveal... Nothing, he managed to get away with that bullshit teleport move again. I walked back into the room with my new prize. Smelled suspiciously like cheese. Huh- SSSSSNNNNNF yep that's the smell of my death all right. the sisters were quite surprised by my new accessory "Did you think I was joking? I WASN'T!" And no despite what you might think, the cloak did not make me the dead-ed or a reaper. Looked pretty cool though. I whispered to Clyde and Théodore to do me a solid in my vanishing act: "Ok that's all for now and I still don't think you trust me. So I'm just going to go now...bye" I let myself fall backwards into my shadow where Clyde was hiding and let me into his place. The dark shadow was there for the remainder of the time it took Théodore to shrug to the princesses and dive headfirst into the shadows. The shadow dispelled and I at that moment took the title of king of best exits. A bit later Théodore reunited with his long lost mother. But I'm not saying anything else. Family matters you know. And to this day we still don't know what happened to all that cake. Truly one of the greatest mysteries of this land.