Flash Sentry took a deep breath. Why did he do that? Because it was a good day. A perfect day. It was sunny and bright. Too bright. Actually, he kind of hurt now that he thought about it. Quite a bit in fact. And his back was wet. And he could feel the dirt in his wings. He hated that. And really if he thought about it…
No, no, no, Flash. Everything is great. Today is GREAT. Everything is going to go your way because you are Flash Sentry and EVERYTHING. IS. GREAT.
“Hey Flash Butt, you going to get up or should I just keep whooping your sorry flank while you’re down?”
Or the concussion is making me just slightly euphoric… Euphoric. Euphoric? Euphoric! Huh, fun word, I should use it more. Wait, what was I doing? Oh yeah.
Flash Sentry pushed into the ground with his wings and launched himself back up into a standing position. As he came up, mud dislodged from where he’d been thrown and splattered the pony that had taunted him.
As he got his bearings, Flash noted that everything was kind of dizzy, but that was okay because dizzy was fun! Definitely, the funnest state. Now if only he could think of a witty response to his adversary, the three orange coated meanies. Wait, three? Flash thought there was only one. That didn’t make any sense, he only got piledrived into the ground by one burly orange earth pony. He never said he had two identical twins he could call on demand.
“How dare thee summon your identical twins on demand, foul Crash Beat!” Flash pointed an accusatory hoof.
All three Orange adversaries collectively gave Flash a lidded stare, “Do you… have a concussion?”
“Neigh, for I shall butt your whoop! Or is it whoop your whoop? Wait, what was I saying?” As Flash brought a hoof up to ponder this most elusive of sayings, he promptly fell back into the mud puddle once more splattering the other pony.
Splattering was also a fun word.
Flash heard a deep sigh from a dark brown earth pony nearby. “Okay, that’s enough.”
The very large stallion came over and, with a single pull, brought Flash back into a standing position.
Hey, now the whole WORLD was spinning!
The large stallion looked over, sighed heavily, and turned to Crash Beat. “Good show Private Beat, excellent use of a pile drive. ”
Crash saluted, “Sir, yes, Sir Sergeant Steel Bastion!”
“At ease Private, and drop the first name when addressing me.” Crash nodded in understanding. The stallion, Steel Bastion, turned to Flash this time, “Flash you need to not charge forward. You do not have the muscle for that.”
“Sir, pops always said to confront problems head on!” Flash thought for a moment, “Preferably with your head, Sir!”
“Flash, your father was a 200 pound wall of muscle that could probably dwarf a small dragon. You are a pegasus with an above average build, but still a Pegasus.” Sergeant Steel Bastion put extra emphasis on that last word like it meant something important.
“It’s okay sir, I have been told my head is as thick as.. as um… as”, Flash thought really hard about it for a moment, “a thick thing sir!”
Steel Bastion rubbed his face with a spare hoof. “Why did I let him convince me to do this… ALRIGHT BACK TO THE BARRACKS WITH YOU LOT.”
“Sir!” Flash Sentry saluted and started to head to the barracks after the others, but was met by a rather impressive muzzle of scars. Very scary scars now that Flash was looking at them up close.
“You.” Steel Bastion poked Flash with a hoof, “Need to stop picking fights with ponies bigger than you. This was supposed to be just a friendly sparring match to end the day off of your first week of training. Not a complete slaughter of what I’m beginning to find to be the most troublesome recruit I have ever met. Again.”
“But he insulted my llama, sir!”
“Your llama?” Steel lidded his eyes.
Wait, no. That’s not right.
“My pride, sir!”
For probably the twentieth time that day and hundredth time that first week, Steel Bastion rubbed his temples with a solitary hoof. “Flash, let me give you some advice.”
“Yes, Sergeant Scary, sir?”
“I’m going to let that one go because I’m pretty sure you have a concussion, but...” and the scary muzzle was in Flash’s face again and yelling really loud, “STOP. PICKING. FIGHTS. WITH. PONIES. BIGGER. THAN. YOU.”
“Yes siree, sir Sir sir.”
“Also, get that concussion looked at.”
Flash saluted crisply and most certainly did not have to be pulled back up off the ground again by Sergeant Steel. Flash trotted off to the Barracks, he was soon joined by a white unicorn with a messy blue mane.
“You know Crash Beat will eventually succeed in killing you.”
“It’s okay Shiney Hiney” the unicorn glared, “Sorry Shining Armor, it’s really hard to remember two names when everything is spinning, you know? Anyways I couldn’t let him insult your sister like that. She’s probably a very nice loser.”
The unicorn, Shining Armor, face hooved. “First she isn’t a loser and I’m going to blame your concussion on that. Second, you seriously need to stop picking fights with Crash Beat.”
I definitely would have won this time if he hadn’t summoned his identical twins.
“It’s okay, I’ll fight dirtier next time.”
“Or not at all?”
“Or not at all!” Flash Sentry cheered.
“There we go, Flash Butt.”
“Hey, that’s a mean thing to say to a friend.”
“Said the pony who just called me Shiney Hiney.”
“Oh, right.”
The two ponies then arrived at the Barracks and began cleaning up for inspection. Or Shining did as Flash Sentry promptly fell over again and had to be taken for medical attention against his cries of injustice at trying to right the world.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Are you sure you should be moving around right now?”
Flash Sentry frowned, annoyed. Shining had been asking him that since they left the barracks and frankly it was getting annoying. He clearly didn’t understand that the doctor had, begrudgingly, said that Flash was perfectly fine, and that therefore meant he was fine.
Besides I prefer the world being tilted ever so slightly.
“Yes, I’m fine, Shining,” Flash Sentry said exasperated, “Where are we going anyways?”
Shining looked like he was going to ask again, but seemed to decide against it. “Well, there’s this chocolate shop that I’ve been told is really good and I have been heavily encouraged to go visit.”
“A chocolate shop?” Flash Sentry said surprised “Who told you that?”
Shining blinked for a moment. “... the princess of love?”
Flash Sentry laughed. “Oh yeah, good one Shiny. As if the Princess would give advice to a guard in training.”
Shining glared and gave Flash a shove.
Completely unaffected by the shove that definitely didn’t cause the world to tilt rapidly in a direction he didn’t think was right, Flash noted a large fanciful building up ahead. “Oh, is that it?”
Shiny stopped glaring for a moment to look, “Oh yeah that’s the one, Chocolate Print.”
The building could quite simply be described as fancy. It was painted in calming shades of brown that wrapped and swirled around the smooth uninterrupted surface of the corner building. All the colours coalesced into a swirl that brought forth the name Chocolate Print in an elegant script.
As the duo entered the building, Flash noted that the outside matched the inside, with luxurious furnishings and calming brown hues. The display case that showcased the staggering assortment of chocolates to choose from stretched from one end of the store to the other in a wave pattern. It gave an air of dignity and refinement that would be better appreciated for ponies with a finer palette.
Yep, definitely pretentious.
They both walked up to the display case passing several giggling mares indulging themselves on small bars of rich, dark chocolate. The store clerk noticed us and walked on over. Shining nudged Flash. “Hey, what are you getting?”
Flash ignored him.
“Uh, Flash you okay?” Shining questioned.
Flash wasn’t here.
“... Flash?”
Flash is busy.
And busy he was. The store clerk that trotted over to them could only be described as divine. He was a large stallion built like a wall with a small layer of flab that was understandable for his working profession. His coat was a rich brown that matched his wares and was patterned with brilliant white spots along his muzzle, legs, and back. His mane was a creamy yellow that was slicked back to perfection and he wore a plaid vest of warm hues with an orange bow tie.
The best part was his soft brown eyes that Flash found himself wanting to swim in. Just cannonball right in and swim about in like a swan. A demented swan because Flash was still suffering ever so slightly from a concussion and he wasn’t sure if it wasn’t contributing to being so awestruck. And dizzy. Yep, definitely still dizzy.
“Good afternoon, how may I serve you gentle stallions today?”
His voice. It was like the smoothest and richest of chocolate drizzled over silk. Wait, was that addressed to him? Oh no, it was. Buck, he had to come up with a perfect and suave response that could perfectly match this stallion of perfection. Had he said perfect yet? What was he doing again? Right, suave greeting.
Flash giggled at a pitch and tone matched only by stallions who’d drunk at least half a barrel of alcohol, “Heya.”
Nailed it.