//------------------------------// // Honesty Is The Best Policy... // Story: And if I don't belong... // by RejectOwl //------------------------------// "Twilight!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed. "Oh thank goodness you're okay! I made some cupcakes, but maybe your tummy won't want them just yet, but they're here anyway!" "Pinkie, please, volume, my head is pounding." Twilight groaned. "Oh, sorry." She said quietly. "So what happened to you?" Rainbow Dash asked, bluntly as usual. Twilight glanced at Applejack, wondering if the orange mare would call her bluff if she lied. "I was really tired and accidentally ate a poisonous plant. I had it for experiments but I guess I was half asleep and sleepwalking." She faked a laugh at her supposed ditzy moment. Immediately she regretted it when she saw the looks Applejack and Pinkie gave her. "Twilight-" Applejack began, but Pinkie kicked her. "How does someone smart as you eat poison?" Twilight knew that wasn't her real question. "Like I said, I was really tired and mistook it for something else." Twilight coughed, and almost immediately a glass of ice cold water was presented to her by Fluttershy. "Thanks Flutters." Twilight muttered, guilt beginning to consume her seeing how caring her friends were. Twilight looked at them, all watching her, worried expressions on their faces and her facade fell, she began sobbing. "I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry." She screamed. "I did it on purpose, I thought I would die!" "Twilight! How could you?" Rarity exclaimed. "What in Tartarus Twilight?" Rainbow Dash yelled. "Stop guys." Fluttershy whispered. "I'm sure Twilight feels hurt enough." "There is never a reason to try to end ones own life." Rarity glared at the yellow pegasus. "Rarity, get out." Applejack ordered. "And if ya don't leave, I'll get the nurse to make you." Rarity huffed and trotted out, Rainbow trailed behind her, sending a glare back at Twilight. "Idiot unicorn." She muttered. "Twilight, what happened that made you feel this way?" Fluttershy asked. "Nothing, just, random depression." Twilight lied. "A'right, now y'all stop the lying Twilight Sparkle. Just tell us the honest truth, we won't judge you." Twilight looked into Applejack's eyes and saw the worry, fear, and love... She couldn't lie. But she couldn't tell the truth either. "I'm sorry Applejack, but, I can't. Not right now. I can't lie to you, but I can't be honest either. Yes, I did try to kill myself, yes there is a lot you guys don't know, but beyond that, I don't want to talk about it right now." Twilight nuzzled the soft fleece Fluttershy had placed in her bed and sighed. It was almost as if she hadn't tried to kill herself last week. The hospital, and Princess Luna, had decided she would not be returning home with only Spike to watch her, but instead, she would be spending a few weeks with Fluttershy, or until they deemed her "stable", whatever that was. "Hey Sugarcube, ready to talk?" Twilight sighed. "I had major problems growing up with my family, there." Twilight answered. "You know that is not what I meant." Applejack answered. "What do you want me to say?" Twilight shouted. "That my own family abused me, that I was ecstatic when Celestia took me on because it meant escape? That even when I escaped my parents, my brother becoming a military personal meant I still couldn't escape him?" "Twilight... what did they do to you?" Fluttershy whispered horror-struck. Hot tears spilled down her muzzle and she began sobbing and shaking at the memories that assaulted her. Fluttershy wrapped a wing around her. "No!" Twilight screamed. "Don't touch me!" Her magic flared and Fluttershy was thrown back. "Don't touch me! Don't hurt me! Get away." She yelled her eyes wild in fear. She screamed incoherently and backed into the corner of the room. No one could hurt her if she saw them coming and hurt them first. "Twilight, it's okay, you're not there." Applejack said gently. "You're with friends. You're in Fluttershy's cottage." "Just take a deep breath Twilight." Fluttershy instructed. "They will never hurt you again, your friends will make sure they can't touch you." "Fluttershy?" Twilight whispered, her eyes unfocused. "That's right. I'm here for you. Your friends are here." "Not all of them." Twilight hissed. "Oh heck with them!" Applejack exclaimed. "A pony suffering is more important than someone's ego." "We understand why you didn't tell anyone." Fluttershy soothed. "You felt they might judge you. Felt at fault. And you still love your family and want to protect them. You worried telling would get them in trouble." Tears formed in Twilight's eyes and she nuzzled Fluttershy. "I'm sorry I hurt you." Twilight whispered. "I've had worse. I work with bears, remember?" Fluttershy laughed lightly. "How are you so empathic Fluttershy?" Twilight asked nuzzling closer to the yellow mare, who wrapped a wing around her lightly, testing Twilight's reaction. When Twilight sighed and nuzzled closer, Fluttershy wrapped her tighter. "I always have been. That probably would have been my cutie mark if empathy had a physical form." She smiled and cuddled her friend. "What if they hurt me?" Twilight whispered. "No one is going to hurt you again Twilight." Applejack reassured. "But, I told about what they did to me. What if they find out and try to get revenge? What if Celestia and Luna find out and try to put them in the dungeons!?" "One, they'd deserve it. Two, ya shouldn't be wanting to protect them anyway, they hurt you. And Three, Luna was investigating your dreams when you was in that coma, so she might already know depending on if you was havin' nightmares 'bout it or not. I'd think ya were, since that's what drove ya to eat poison." Twilight began to sob again and Fluttershy glared at Applejack. "What? It's the truth!" "That doesn't mean you should say it." Fluttershy scolded. Applejack sighed and lowered her head, defeated. She knew she was too honest sometimes, and now she'd hurt Twilight. She wouldn't apologize for the truth though. "I'm sorry I hurt you Twilight, but I won't lie, and 'm not sorry for what I said, only that it hurt you." "No, no you're right Applejack, of course you're right." Twilight cried. "I shouldn't have done it, and I'm sorry I worried you all so much. And if I'd died... the pain you'd of gone through..." "Twilight, stop beating yourself up. You're hurting, from what I can understand, you've gone through more pain than most ponies twice your age." Applejack reassured. "It's okay to hurt Twilight," Fluttershy reassured her, "it means you're still here, you're still alive."