The sun’s ray snaked their way through the glass window of the barn and lit small sections of the barn floor as warmth started to fill the barn. Opening my eyes I wiped the crust out of my eyes and looked around at the scene before me. The night had been tougher than I thought, the cold had gotten through the straw and left me shivering. I figured the plan for today was trying to find the farmer who owned this property and attempt to find out where I currently was. Before I could move I heard a female voice ring out in a deep southern drawl. “Alright Granny, I’ll get the shovel”. I jumped out of the pile of straw and hid behind the bales of hay behind me. I didn’t want to scare whoever was coming into the barn or even be shot by accident. The barn door slid open with ease and I watched in absolute surprise and confusion to what entered in. The thing that walked through the door was no woman, girl….or even human…..it was a…….pony?
The pony was orange colored with a long blonde mane that was tied up in a ponytail with a red hairband and based on its features, she wore a light brown Stetson. From where I was at from behind the bales of hay I could tell that the pony had some muscles to her. I stared at the strange pony without blinking as a thousand thoughts came racing into my head. Oh my Lawd, I sure am trippin on something fierce……whatever that is it’s no pony I’ve seen……why is it wearing a hairband and a Stetson…..what planet am I on. I thought in shear paniac. The pony happily trotted over to the wall and found what she was looking for which was a shovel hanging on the wall. I furrowed my brow in confusion. How does a pony use of shovel…does it use it’s hoofs or what…..wait is this place inhabitated by colorful ponies……..oh God I hope not…..it sounds too much like a t.v show, I thought.
“Ah found it Granny” the orange pony said in the drawl that I heard earlier. At that moment I accidently let out a gasp which I instantly covered up with my hand. I hoped the orange mare didn’t hear it but she stopped on a dime, her right ear standing up at attention. Oh shit. I thought in fear. The orange pony turned around a determined look on her face as she slowly started trotting over to where I was hiding. Ok, if she sees you run like the devil himself was after yah. I thought as my hand gripped the hay bale tightly.
The orange mare continued to trot over to the hay bale until she stood right where I was sleeping the night before. Looking down at the pile of hay her face went from confusion to shock at the sight of the large indention in the pile. Looking over to where her attention was focused my face started to turn white as I watched her inspect the indention in the hay with her hoof. Oh no….she knowns I’m here. I thought in terror. The pony then sniffed the pile, before her head cocked back at the unknown sent. “Fresh” I heard her say softly to herself as she got another sniff. Her head then jolted up in the air as she started to take a few more curious steps into the pile. Looking behind me I started to slowly and quietly step back further until I realized that the piles of haybales blocked my escape. With nowhere to go I sat back against the bales hoping that the pony creature didn’t want to kill me. If I had to I was willing to defend myself to the death if need be.
The orange pony stepped past the pile of hay and walked toward me. By now I could see her muzzle from where I was sitting and could even see the vapor of her breath rising in the cool air. Rounding the corner I caught a full and up close look at the pony. Her emerald green eyes soon widen in absolute fear and confusion at the being in front of her. “WHAT IN CELESTIA’S NAME ARE YOU, AND WHAT ARE YAH DOIN IN MAH BARN” she yelled out in confusion and fear.
AHHHHHHH…TALKING PONIES…..NO THIS AIN”T REAL” I yelled out in fear as I stood up and climbed up the haybale wall behind me. When I reached the top I jumped off the side and landed hard on the wooden floor. I then broke out in a full sprint across the barn as I looked back to see the orange pony her mouth hanging open in surprise before she regained her composure and started to give chase. “No no no no no no no…….this can’t be…ponies can’t talk……they’re not sentient……I must be tripping…..where the hell am i……I just wanna go home” I said loudly as I ran for my dear life across the barnyard and jumped the fence.