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// Pet-Smart, And The Pet-Adventurous 
// Story: Book 2: To Bring About Chaos 
// by Medley of MLP 
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To Bring About Chaos



Pet-Smart, And The Pet-Adventurous


“Hey Med! Time to get up already, sleepyhead!” Dash called out from my window in an obnoxiously loud voice.

I glared out the window, barely raising my head to do so as I saw that shit-eating grin of hers. “Rainbow Dash… you are so lucky I am just getting up and do not have the energy to hit you with a pumped up sonic voice. Though you are giving me the temptation to do so as of right now.”

Dash just rolled her eyes and waved a hoof. “Got time to talk, got time to move it and see where everypony else is!”

“I… hate you… so much…” I grumbled as I staggered out of bed, reluctantly leaving my comfortable bed.

I’ll admit, I was being very petty as I took as much time as I could to go through my morning routine and make Dash wait an agonizingly long time. But hey, she made the mistake of waking me up so early, so I thought I was due for a little revenge on my part by making her wait longer than if she had just waited until later.

As I was going through my morning routine, I had time to think about what I was supposed to do today. I couldn’t remember if today was a teaching day or not, then realized it was a Saturday, and thus didn’t apply for once. Then I tried to think of something that I had promised Dash to do very soon, but I was coming up with a blank. When I finally finished everything, I remembered what exactly was going on today.

“Wait… today’s the Pony Pet Playdate, isn’t it?” I spoke aloud in confusion.

“The what now?” Dash looked just as confused as well.

“It’s a thing the other ladies do every weekend or so. Normally I don’t go, seeing as how I don’t have a pet and don’t really plan to. Occasionally I’ll tag along and play with Owlowiscious, but it’s just not my kind of thing, you know?”

“Yeah… kinda weird to be there on a Pony Pet Playdate if you don’t have a pet, right?” Dash agreed, looking very awkward.

“Wait… did you seriously take a nap at where the others were meeting up?” I snorted.

“Shut up!” Dash whined. “I didn’t even realize that was a thing until just today!”

I snickered at Dash’s reaction. “Aw, come on now. At least it’s not the worst thing you forgot, right?”

“You miss one weather report…” Dash grumbled.

“Dash. We needed a blizzard. In the summer.” I rolled my eyes a bit.

Any further back and forth comments were ended when we finally arrived at the area everypony was meeting up for the Pony Pet Playdate. Sure enough, everyone was with there with their pets. Sparkella with Owlowiscious, Pinkie with Gummy, Shy with Angel, AJ with Winona, and Rares with Opal. I, of course, had no pet alongside Dash, but seeing her jealous looks, I got the feeling that was about to change rather quickly. Sure enough, after some awkward tension, Dash finally burst.

“Hey, now wait a minute! Just because I don't have a pet now doesn't mean I never want a pet!” Dash came to the realization, though spoke it out loud.

That quickly got Shy’s attention, who gave an excited gasp and wide smile as she spoke on a long tangent. It was kinda funny, since for once, Shy was the one being excited and dragging Dash off towards her cottage. Dash rolled her eyes as she went with it, flapping her own wings to make it easier for Shy to take there quicker.

“Oh! Medley, did you want a pet too?” Shy smiled at me.

I chuckled as I shook my head. “Sorry Shy. I barely keep myself going as it is, I don’t think I could quite handle remembering a pet.”

It seemed this time though, Shy was extra stubborn on the issue. “I have a lot of songbirds, and I know they can easily remind you and can live quite comfortably alongside Owlowiscious.”

At that, I gave a small groan and capitulated. “Fiiiiiiiine… but I might not have them for long. I say if needed, let them live with you instead, and I can visit them.”

Shy squeaked with pure joy as she brought us back to her cottage and… she began to sing alongside Dash. I had to say, for somepony that is usually very reluctant to do anything related to singing, she had a pretty good voice. With enough work, I could make it even better, if I’m tooting my own horn here. But anyways, back to the song, it really sounded like Dash wanted a fast-flying pet to keep up with her. And of course it had to be “cool and awesome”, just like her. Of course, that led from having so little at the beginning to too many near the end. The brilliant idea to help pick a pet? A race, of all things. One to test their speed, agility, and guts. Gotta say, an impressive duet between the two, and of course recorded. Because like Tartarus I’m gonna forget a song like that.

“Oh! What did you decide on Medley?” Shy blushed as she finished the song, now noticing I was there.

“Hmmm…” I took a moment before finally settling on the parrot with a small grin. “You know what, I’m feeling…”

Dash noticed the trail-off, and nudged me. “Hey, you OK there Med?”

I blinked as I nodded. “Yeah, sure thing. Songbird please.”

Shy looked confused for a moment. “But… you were looking at the parrot, weren’t you?”

“Raawk! Looking at the parrot!” The parrot warbled back with a nod.

I shook my head. “No, I was thinking the sensible option was the songbird.”

“You’re sounding kinda weird dude. But whatever, your pet.” Dash shrugged as I got my pet.

It was apparently a female blue jay, who’s name was Lexitara. For some reason, I felt like I could both bond with and somehow not feel quite right with her. But hey, a pet is a pet. She could work very well around Owlowiscious, and could even fend for herself if needed. Now at least I could be a part of the Pony Pet Playdate alongside the other ladies. All that would be needed to be complete was Dash finding her own pet. Which, of course, included many a challenge for the birds, plus one tortoise, to complete.

All in all, it was a rather interesting experience seeing Dash line up all the pets for the first event, as though she was a drill sergeant. She even sounded like one as well, making me remember when she used to try and sneak into the Wonderbolts Academy as a filly.

“So! You all think you've got what it takes to be my pet, do ya? Well, we'll just see about that! If any of you don't think you can handle it, bow out now before you humiliate yourself in front of your peers. This competition isn't for the weak. You'd better be prepared to step up your game! You call that flapping?!” Dash stopped mid-tirade to yell at a butterfly, who flapped even harder than before in response as Dash continued. “That's better. There's only room on Team Dash for one of you, and my future pet needs to be able to take it to the extreme! Any questions?”

“I got one. Does she understand what a pet really needs?” AJ retorted quietly to the rest of us.

“Yeah, like care and attention, love and affection-” She was cut off with a lick from Winona, making a face. “Ugh! And breath mints!”

I rolled my eyes with a small smile as I saw Shy and Dash argue about the tortoise competing with everyone else. Gotta admit, it was only slightly childish, but it was Dash wanting her own pet. But after some prodding, and some adorable puppy dog eyes from Shy, Dash relented as she reluctantly accepted the tortoise as a competitor.

“Alright, now these games will determine which one of you has the most important qualities I'm looking for in a pet. Speed. Agility. Guts. Style. Coolness. Awesomeness. And radicalness.”

“I think some of those things you mentioned are in fact, the same thing.” I dryly pointed out.

“You would think that, Med. And that's why you would never qualify to be my pet.” Dash patted me on the head with a smirk.

“No, but I think that would qualify him to be my pet.” Sparkella smirked before blushing, hearing what she just said.

Everyone blinked owlishly, except for me, as my first thoughts made me blush, get a wingboner, and then promptly pass out from blood rush.

When I came too, I could hear Sparkella giggling at me, as I groaned. “Sparkella… didn’t know you were that brazen.”

“I’m really sorry Medi!” She laughed lightly. “It was a spur of the moment idea, and I finally got payback from Dash’s… insinuations from earlier.”

I rolled my eyes as Lexitara settled back on my shoulder. “Now you realize she’ll try even harder to say stuff like that.”

Sparkella blinked before groaning. “Celestia damn it…”

Now I was the one chuckling, nuzzling her lightly. “Hey now, it could always be a lot worse. Especially knowing Dash like we do.”

That got a nod from Sparkella, along with a small chuckle and smile. We soon made our way back over to where the animals were still competing, and it looked like I only really missed the beginning part of it all.

“Hey everypony. What’d I miss?” I casually tried to reintegrate myself into the action.

It looked like no pony had forgotten though, especially Rarity, who gave a light smirk as she responded. “Oh, nothing much darling. I dare say you and Twilight had a bit more fun than us.”

It’s a bad sign when even your pet is snickering at you from how much you sputter. But seriously, what the heck?! It wasn’t anything like that! Though thinking about it now… no, bad Medley, bad! No daydreaming stuff like that, at least until she’s comfortable with… GAH! One sec, be right back, need to take care of something real quick.

OK, back now and ready to continue the day as it played out. And honestly… there really wasn’t much to put down of note. Dash would go to the next section, some would perform better than others while the tortoise just tanked at everything. It eventually reached it’s ending, with a “pep talk” from Dash to the tortoise before it started.

“I mean... 'A' for effort and everything, you gave it your best shot, maybe I've got a gold star sticker around here somewhere you can have, but, seriously, go home. You're starting to creep me out.” After a bit, Dash continued on, pointedly trying to avoid the tortoise. “So, anyway, you're all outstanding competitors, but there can only be one of you who's number one. So the final tie-breaking contest is going to be... pause for dramatic effect... a race against... me! Through Ghastly Gorge!”

I was pretty impressed that Dash would try and use that place for her final test for pets. After all, with a name like that, there’s a reason ponies try to avoid it. Especially pegasi. Still, I went with everypony, just to see who exactly would win out of the pool of a hawk, an eagle, a bat, and an owl.

“Actually, Ghastly Gorge isn't scary. It's fun. Heh. I've flown through it a million times myself, so obviously I'll be at the front of the pack. But whichever of you make it across the finish line with me will have proven you can keep up with me, and will have earned the honor and glory of getting to be my pet! Ready? Setgo!” And just like that, Dash was off, with her possible pets following in close pursuit.

Now we were left with some down time, hearing Dash’s whoops and cheers as she made it deeper into the valley.

“I do hope she’s alright…” Shy murmured worryingly.

“Well, gotta admit somethin’, and that’s Dash can take carea herself quite nicely.” AJ threw in her own two bits.

“I hope so… especially with those terrifying, horrible Quarray Eels in there…” Shy murmured.

“Wait… I just remembered something super duper interesting about the Gorge too!” Pinkie interjected. “It’s rrreeeaaallly unstable, which means it’s waaaaaay too easy to cause an avalanche!”

“That’s… not especially a fun fact, darling. I do hope Rainbow Dash is at least trying to be safe about this.” Rarity sighed.

I rolled my eyes a bit. “Yes. The daredevil trying to play it safe and not show off to her possible pet. It’s just as likely as me disowning my instruments and becoming a traveler of the world.”

“Med…” Sparkella looked at me curtly. “Please, try not to be sarcastic about this, alright?”

“Yes Twi…” I grumbled as I looked back out, only to look a little lost. “Hey, is it just me, or are the birds coming back without Dash?”

“Wait… Something’s not right here.” Sparkella looked out with a set of binoculars in agreement.

“Where’s Dash?” Shy looked especially worried now, bumping Sparkella aside to desperately look through the binoculars.

AJ popped up in front of Shy, taking a third look before giving a small shout of horrified surprise. “Great galloping galoshes! There's been an avalanche in there!”

“Dash!” Shy cried out.

Now we were especially worried, Sparkella leaving the duty of searching with me as the others talked worryingly. However, I was beaten to the punch by Pinkie, who noticed it before I did.

“Wait! Look!” Pinkie called out. “It’s the turtle!”

“Tortoise!” Shy and I both called back, but were happy nonetheless.

“And it looks like he’s carrying something on his back…” I mumbled, trying to get a better look through the dust.

“Wait a tic! It’s Dash herself!” AJ commented,

We all started to cheer before it slowly died down, as we then all realized something important: Dash was riding on a tortoise, after what looked like an avalanche.

“Maybe we better go meet him halfway.” Shy offered, which was met with general agreement as we caught up with Dash, moving the finishing line with us to celebrate the tortoise finishing the race.

As we cheered him on, Sparkella looked at Dash with relief. “Oh, thank goodness you're not hurt, Rainbow!”

“Just my pride.” Dash smiled a tiny bit, brushing off some dust from herself.

“I certainly hope all of this dreadful dust was worth it!” Rarity pointedly stated before sneezing.

“It sure was, if'n it means Rainbow gets to have her own little critter just like the rest of us from now on.” AJ grinned at Dash knowingly.

Dash though, looked down at the tortoise before getting off and getting down to his level. “Uh… thanks. What you did… I owe you one.”

With Dash making a hoof-bump with the tortoise, Shy smiled as she called over the falcon. “Rainbow! Your new pet is over here waiting for you!”

“Oh... Right... Yeah... That.” Dash looked very unenthusiastic, which was kinda odd for her.

“What’s the matter?” I looked at her curiously.

“You got your perfect pet, right?” Pinkie added.

“The best of the best like you wanted, remember? It can fly and it's not a squirrel! Should we sing about it again?” Shy offered readily.

“A falcon sure looks good on ya, Rainbow.” AJ commented while Rarity took a picture, making the tortoise flee back into his shell instantly.

“Easy, fella. Nothing to be afraid of. The falcon sure does looks cool... He's absolutely everything I wanted in a pet.” Dash sighed dejectedly.

“Yay…?” Shy confusedly cheered.

“But I said whoever crosses the finish line with me gets to be my pet.” Dash pointed out.

“That is true… She did say that.” Sparkella nodded, almost connecting the dots with a small smile.

“And the only racer who crossed the finish line with me was the one who stopped to save me when I needed help. The tortoise!” Dash picked up the tortoise with a hoof, grinning.

I have to saw, it was a unique experience watching a falcon have a wide array of emotions before admitting defeat gracefully.

“Wait, what about the-” I was cut off as I noticed the falcon shaking… appendages in the likeness of a hoof shake before the tortoise turned around, giving a slow smile, and making me lose my train of thought from how adorable he looked.

AJ even made a comment on it. “Wouldja look at that? He even smiles slow.”

After a good laugh at that, Dash looked to Sparkella. “Could you please take a letter and have Spike deliver it later?”

“Of course, Rainbow! I take it this is to Princess Celestia?” Sparkella agreed amicably, taking out a sheet of parchment and a quill.

“You bet! Ahem…” Dash then proceeded to sound out the letter, which looked like this:

Dear Princess Celestia,
I used to think that the most important traits to look for in a pet, or any best friend, were all physical competitive abilities. But now I can see how short-sighted and shallow that was.Today I learned what the most important quality really is. A certain kind of spirit. A stick-to-it-ive-ness. A never give up, can-do attitude that's the mark of a real winner. And this tortoise has it.

“I think you were looking for the word tenacity.” Sparkella added.

“Gesundheit.” Dash responded to an slightly affronted Sparkella before looking back at the tortoise. “You just can't stop that little guy. He's like a... like a... Tank!”

“Well, at least we have a name instead of just calling him the tortoise.” I chuckled lightly, Lexitara giving a small nod in agreement.

“But Rainbow! You didn't want a pet that couldn't fly because it would keep you grounded and hold you back, remember?” Shy reminded Dash.

“Hm…” Dash looked like she was in deep thought before getting an idea, turning back to Sparkella. “Could you please help me out with my idea?”

“What are you thinking, Rainbow?” Sparkella raised an eyebrow.

“Something to help get him off the ground without wings! Like, I dunno… a propeller or something.” Dash asked.

“That… that could work.” Sparkella looked a little surprised before smiling. “Good idea Rainbow!”

I blinked before looking at Pinkie in great worry. “Is this the end of the world as we know it? Sparkella and Dash agreeing on an idea? Dash getting a super slow pet? What’s next, we find out we have Opposite Elements or something?”

Pinkie laughed as she shook her head. “Silly Med! It’s not the end of the world! I have a Pinkie Sense combo for that!”

I blinked before abruptly cutting that train of thought out, not wanting my brain to short-circuit on me. Soon enough, we bid each other goodbye for the night and headed back to our respective homes. I have to say, it was a wild day from start to finish, and I did get my first pet out of it as well. Who knows how this’ll work out? Either way, I’m happy knowing that I’ll be able to join the next Pony Pet Playdate alongside Dash.


End of Chapter 5