Equestrian Railway Tales

by Sudrian Engineer

Freight Trains and Hills

It was the morning after Troy and Fluttershy had taken Edward out for his run, and Sir Tophamm Hatt had decided that with the extra hands, er, hooves, he had enough staff for Edward to go back on full duty. While most of the engines were happy for him, Gordon was unimpressed. "PAH!," said engine said in anger, "You are a small engine Edward, You'll never be as useful as me, you are just a waste of metal at this point."

“Strong words from the living ego museum.” grumbled Troy. It was still early, and he wasn’t a morning person. “Why don’t you do us all a favor and put that long tongue back behind your teeth?”

"Well I never, Proper drivers are suppose to agree with the engine," the big blue b(beep)h said in response, frowning.

Matthew soon walked up, frowning. "Come one you great big ego balloon, time for the express."

“Hmph. When have Ah ever been any kind of ‘proper’?” Troy shot back as Gordon pulled away. “Well, come on Flutters. Yesterday was fun, but Sir Tophamm thinks it best if we ease the Old Iron into full duty, an Ah agree. We’ll be in the yard shunting all day today.”

Fluttershy nodded and climbed in, starting to light Edward's fire. Meanwhile, Matthew was whispering to Rainbow. "You know how I said Gordon had to pull the express today?"

“Yeah, what about it?” she replied.

He was trying to hold back laughter as he spoke, "I lied, he has a goods train to p-pull.”

Troy's head popped out of Edward's cab at that. "Damn dude, that's just evil." Then he grinned. "You've been hangin around me too long!" With that he went back to work laughing as Edward puffed out.

Matthew just smiled, Rainbow doing the same, as they got into Gordon's cab and started the fire. "So," Matthew said to Rainbow, "You keep saying how fast you are, ever gone 100 mph?"

“I bet I’ve gone even faster!” She bragged.

He nodded, actually pretty interested, shoveling a bit more coal before he spoke again. "So, what else do you do besides go fast?"

“I’m a Wonderbolts Reserve member! They’re only the coolest, most awesome group of flyers in Equestria!”

"Wow, sounds fun," he replied, pulling the lever starting Gordon's motion.
Meanwhile, Troy, Fluttershy and Edward were shunting in the goods yard. Edward enjoyed shunting. It was like playing to an engine of his age and experience. He was now teaching Troy and Fluttershy tricks that even Eagle didn’t know.

“So first, you come in quietly so they don’t know you’re there, and then you bump them into their proper siding.” he said.

“Like this?” Troy said, as he did just as Edward had said.

“Yes, that’s good. We’ll have this yard sorted out in a couple of puffs.” Edward replied.

They played until there were no more trucks, and ran onto a siding to rest. As Troy and Fluttershy had lunch in the cab, Troy looked at his watch. “Bout time for Gordon to come through.” he said. “Think Ah’ll finish mah lunch somewhere with a better view.” he finished with a grin. With that, he gathered what was left of his lunch, jumped and grabbed the edge of the cab roof, and flipped onto the top. “Ahhh, much better.” he said. As Fluttershy joined him on the roof, they heard a whistle as Gordon came through with a long line of dirty trucks.

“A goods train! A goods train! The shame of it! The shame of it, ohhh the indignity.”
Troy laughed and Fluttershy giggled and they got back to work. Meanwhile in his cab, Matthew was repeating a phrase of his own.

"Oh, stuff it Grumpdon, Oh, stuff it Grumpdon."

Later, as Edward was shunting, the yard manager came up. "What's the problem, chief?" Troy asked.

"Gordon can't get up the hill. We need Edward to push him, please."

"No sweat. Let's go, Old Iron." With that, Edward set off to find Gordon.

Meanwhile at the hill, Rainbow and Matthew were arguing with said blue buffoon. "Come on Big G," Rainbow said, "You're not even trying."

“I can't do it. The noisy trucks hold an engine back so. Now if they were coaches, nice sensible things that come quietly, now that would be different.”

Just then, Edward arrived. “We've come to push!” he said as Troy walked up.

“No good.” grumbled Gordon.

“Ah you just wait an see.” Troy replied dismissively. “All that puff, and he gets stuck on a hill. That's gonna be a mighty big egg on his face when the Old Iron gets him an his train over the hill.” he said as he walked away.

Matthew and Rainbow Dash brought Gordon back to the bottom of the hill where Edward was waiting, and after Troy gave the signal, they started off, Gordon still grumbling. "I CAN'T DO IT, I CAN'T DO IT, I CAN'T DO IT!!"

This constant moaning made Fluttershy nervous, "W-will we be able to do it?" She asked Edward and Troy in a worried tone.

“Of course we can.” Edward said encouragingly.

“Pfft. This’ll be a cakewalk. Gordon’s just bein sulky because he wants someone else to pull his freight cars so he can go back to his precious Express.” Troy put in.

Fluttershy nodded, opening the regulator. Meanwhile, Matthew and Rainbow were trying to get Gordon to actually work. Smoke and steam billowed from the snorting engines amidst a chorus of "I can't do it" and "I will do it."

And then almost before they knew it, they were over the summit. Gordon gasped and started to gloat, annoyingly, "I've done it, I've done it, I'VE DONE IT. I KNEW I COULD DO IT!!"

He ran on so fast, that Edward was left far behind and unable to catch up. As they pulled into a siding at the next station to fill Edward’s water tank, Troy spoke up.
“Well how do ya like that. Not even a thank you. Bah, Ah don’t even know what Ah was expectin. Still, that was a mighty fine show Old Iron. Tell ya what, Ah’m off tomorrow, How bout Ah swing by the shed with some paint to fix up yer coat?”

Edward replied with a smile, "Oh yes, that would be nice."