What If...? Screwball Had A Harley Quinn Complex

by No1MporXant


Disproving Discorded History

Discord tries to show Dr. Ballentine a good time while still spreading Chaos everywhere he goes, suddenly he stops, holds out his hand in a "STOP" hand gesture and says "Wait", he then looks in another direction, he then says "So They've finally arrived, this will be amusing".

He then makes a copy of himself and tells it "Take Care of Them".

The copy bows and says "It'll be Our pleasure".

Dr. Ballentine -now taking in more of an average/normal style of speaking- asks Discord "What was That all about?".

He replies "Oh, Celestia sent Twilight Sparkle & her little friends to stop me, (then he speaks in more of a menacing tone)so I'm going to make sure that they fail" he then makes an evil laugh with lightning bolts in the background.

She then asks him "You're not going to, Eradicate Them, are you?".

Discord responds in shock says "What?! Oh perish the thought, (he then poofs up a display chart to show Dr. Ballentine what the situation is and says)You see, it's the power of their friendship that fuels the Elements of Harmony, the only magical relics that are capable of ending all my chaotic fun & sealing me away in a stone imprisonment, last time Celestia & Luna used the Elements to turn me into a living statue over 1000 Years ago, but now Twilight & her friends wield the Elements, and their friendship is the key to their success, so I plan to break their little hearts & ruin their friendship, turning them all against each other, that way they will be unable to use the Elements and I'll be free to spread chaos forever, so I have no reason to crassly resort to violence".

Dr. Ballentine takes all of this into account and says "hmmm fascinating, all of this Chaos, and you don't show any intentions of purposely causing anyone any actual harm, despite the fact that all Equestrian historical records of you depict you as being a sadistic, cruel, ruthless, barbaric, heartless psychopath".

Discord gasps in shock then says "Oh, your words hurt, I'm Chaotic, not Psychopathic".

Dr. Ballentine responds "Exactly! A true Psychopath is someone without moral qualms, who does horrifically terrible things without feeling guilt, remorse, or regret, and has no regard for others, However from what I've seen, all your doing is making nonsensical, juvenile, whimsical alterations to the very reality that surrounds you, while forcing others to share in your concept of fun, but not actually trying to harm anyone, there for you show signs of being more along the lines of a Sociopath, an antisocial being who has difficulty defining what is right from wrong, someone willing to do bad things but still worries about the consequences of their own actions, and the effects they have on others".

Discord responds "(phhhft) Finally! Someone actually gets it right, I am but a humble artist in the Art of Chaos, I want myself & everyone else to have fun unabated by anything, even those highfalutin laws of physics everyone seems so attached to, but still there's no Fun in spreading Chaos if someone actually get badly hurt, especially if it's beyond recovery".

Discord then makes a wide Soapy road appear before him, then poofs himself into an ice-figure-skaters outfit and asks Dr. Ballentine, "Anyways, Shall we Dance(prounced as Dawnce)".

She replies "But I've never skated before".

Then Discord takes her by the hoof and says "Well there's always a first for everything, (then while they're both close to each other's faces Discord says)Don't worry, I promise I won't let you get injured", then the two begin figure-skating together on the soapy road, both of them laughing in delight.