It is said that in times of great stress, time slows down. Obviously, this is nonsensical. Time continues to tick onwards at a rate of one second per second, and there is nothing that can change it. However, the mind under stress tends to race in leaps and bounds far ahead of its usual capacity, jumping from synapse to synapse in desperate motion. When this works, we call it instinct. When it fails, we call it blind panic. Whatever it was, Blueblood connected the gargoyles surrounding him with the sonic screwdriver in his hoof, and with a scream that combined proud rebellion and revenge and blind primal terror, he spun and turned the screwdriver right in the gargoyle’s face.
The scene was a perfect, frozen tableau. The gargoyles were stunned. Blueblood panted in exertion. Nothing happened.
You forgot to push th’ button, idiot, a voice in Blueblood’s head growled. It sounded suspiciously northern. Oh. Blueblood pushed the button. The screwdriver hummed for a moment, then lit.
The gargoyle in front of Blueblood recovered itself and swung forward. As it grew closer, however, the stone began to chip and crack, talons turning to dust even as they swung toward him. The only thing that hit the prince was a shower of dust. He stared at the stone creature. It stared back, horrified. The disarmed monster began to crumble, slowly at first, and then all at once into a cascade of sand and pebbles, with a mare’s corpse in the center of the pile.
There was a long moment of silence. Even the breeze seemed to still. Then, slowly, a smile spread over Blueblood’s face. “Right then,” he said, turning in a slow circle. “Who else wants some?”
The statues surrounded him. The unicorn counted three, plus the one on the roof. “You cannot destroy us all.”
“No,” Blueblood admitted. “No, probably not. But I do not intend to go down without a fight. This is an imported suit, you know, Armponi. Blood would be quite expensive to remove. So, in short, who’s coming first?”
They hesitated. And so, they were lost. Blueblood pointed the screwdriver at the top of the TARDIS and pressed the button. The gargoyle atop shrieked and began to dissolve, beginning with the talon covering the TARDIS light. Brilliant rays illuminated the scene. The gargoyles froze in their tracks, shielding their eyes, waiting to dissolve. They did not. Blueblood quickly took stock of the situation and galloped through their ranks, keeping the screwdriver carefully clenched in his mouth as he ran.
***
The Doctor hung limp now. His forehooves were tired, and he could feel his circulation being cut off. That was one of the few problems a bicardial system couldn’t solve. Cut off enough blood flow, and there’s not much either heart can do about it. He doubted that it was going to be fatal, or even get worse than his limbs falling asleep, but it was going to make running a bit difficult. Always assuming, that is, that he could get himself free of these ropes to begin with. He observed the Goblin with a wary eye as the hulking stone beast watched the entrance to the maze. Suddenly, the statue flinched, closing its bright green eyes tightly. The Doctor smirked. Blue was a clever lad after all, then. “Something the matter?”
“A… minor inconvenience,” the earthen foe ground out. “One which will be rectified shortly.”
“He knocked out a couple of your soldiers, hasn’t he.”
The Goblin became even stonier, if such a thing were possible. The Doctor grinned. “Oh, fantastic,” he laughed.
“Fantastic,” the Goblin echoed. “Fantastic? Doctor, do you know why I had to do this? Do you know why I did what I did? My species is dying. We are not long for existence.” He glared at the Doctor. “As if you could understand.”
The cheeky grin was gone now. “Oh, I understand, alright. I understand more than you could ever know. ‘Cause you, you’ve still got some folks left, right? Not me. I’m the last of my kind. My planet burned in the flames of war, and I’m th’ one that lit the match. My family, my friends, my world, gone in an instant, and it’s my fault! And d’ya know why? Well?” He glared at the stone creature, who faltered under the steady gaze. “I did it to save the rest of the sodding universe. It was one of the hardest choices I’ve ever made, an’ I did it anyway.
“Oh, an’ something else I understand? I know more than why you did what you did. I know what it is that you did. Loose patches of rock might be possible, even in a really top-notch mine, but the surveyors couldn’t find any. An’ given that your species can do geomancy, I might be inclined t’ wonder just who caused that cave-in to start with!”
There was silence in the center of the maze. Green eyes flickered from side to side in confusion and realization. The Goblin-in-Chief whirled around. Accusing eyes glared at him from all sides. “I— that is, I—”
“You killed them,” the Doctor said quietly. “Not the aristocrats. Not the rich. They were just a scapegoat. I mean, they’re not blameless by any measure, but they weren’t the ones what killed you lot.”
He gestured to the large goblin as best he could. “He did.” He paused. “Or she. They? You’ve a hive mind, haven’t you?”
While the Doctor was talking, the smaller goblins had fallen silent. One let out a piercing shriek and charged the former leader of the group. He was backhanded by a stone arm and sent flying into the hedges, but others quickly joined in the fight, piling onto the bigger creature. For a moment, it looked as though the great goblin might fall. But then, the great stone creature shuddered and rose up, smaller goblins falling off it. Its green eyes flashed like fireworks. “You,” it snarled, gesturing at the Doctor. “Die.”
Suddenly, the ropes felt much tighter. The Doctor glanced around in surprise. The broken shards of the stone fountain were moving away from each other. He grunted in pain as he felt his limbs stretching far beyond what was comfortable. The gargoyle grinned menacingly as the smaller stone beasts swarmed over it once more. At least, those that hadn’t already shattered on the ground. The stones jerked out a little further and the Doctor bellowed.
At that moment, a white figure dashed through the hedges, buzzing and glowing slightly blue. “‘Et goo ‘f ‘m!”
There was a long moment of silence. Then Blueblood paused and removed the sonic from his mouth. “Sorry. Let go of him!”
The Doctor stared. “Blueblood?”
The gargoyle regarded the unicorn thoughtfully. “No.”
There was a final yank and a horrible ripping noise from the broken fountain. Blueblood gasped. “Doctor!”
“Yes?” The green stallion stood up, brushing himself off. “Dunno what you thought tha’ was gonna do. Really, which d’you reckon is goin’ to rip first, me or th’ rope?”
There was a long moment of silence. Then, quickly, Blueblood held up the sonic screwdriver with a triumphant smile. “Ha! I’ve found your weakness! Take this!”
The tip of the screwdriver lit with blacklight. A staticky hum broke the night. Nothing happened.
Nothing continued to happen.
Blueblood’s smile grew forced and plastic. “Uh, Blue?” the Doctor asked.
“Yes?”
“Sorry ‘bout earlier. You’ve a right to know what you’re gettin’ into. For what it’s worth, I will do my honest best to keep you safe.”
“Thank you Doctor. Much appreciated.”
“On that note, you probably ought t’ know that that tiny amount of UV radiation would only have any noticeable effect on these goblins for a few minutes after sundown, when they’re weak.”
“Oh.” Blueblood’s smile dropped. “Ideas?”
“One or two, yeah. It’s an oldie but it’s a goodie. Essentially, you just RUN!” The Doctor bucked a large chunk of the busted fountain toward the cluster of goblins, who scattered. Then the Time Lord broke into a stumbling gallop, racing back toward the prince. “Go, go, go!”
“That’s it? That’s your plan?”
“Nah, nah, this is jus’ step one.”
“What’s step two?”
“...Workin’ on it.”
Blueblood gaped at the green stallion. “You what?”
“Right.”
The prince lit up. “You have an idea?”
“No, turn right!” Blueblood glanced up to see a talon swooping down to slice his scalp off. The Doctor barreled into the unicorn’s side, sending both of them sprawling through the shrubbery.
Quickly, the Time Lord scrambled to his hooves and yanked Blueblood bodily upright. “Come on, moving right along. Talk as you go.”
“What is it that hurts them?” the prince gasped, struggling to keep up.
“Well, working off what I’ve seen, ultraviolet radiation,” the Doctor replied. “They hide from th’ sun, and the sonic shattered ‘em ‘cause of the light, not the frequency. But that only got em’ when their rocky bits were still forming. Lot tougher now.”
“Hide from— Sunlight?” Blueblood panted.
“Yeah. Told ‘em they oughta be scared o’ your aunt.”
“Party!”
“What?”
“At the party— down!” The Doctor narrowly dodged a claw that would have lopped off his cranium. “At the party, lanterns. Powered by Auntie’s magic. Sun magic! Sunlight!”
“Fantastic!” the Doctor cheered. “Jump!” Blueblood hurled himself over a talon that had scythed out of the hedges. In a much quieter voice, the Time Lord continued, “You get those lamps. I’ll lead ‘em a merry chase.”
“As you say. Good luck, Doctor.”
“And you.”
They reached a T-juncture. The Doctor went left. Blueblood ran right. It was all up to him.