//------------------------------// // Part 16: Hurt (Bricklayer and Shadowmane PX-41) // Story: Poison Whiskey // by The Bricklayer //------------------------------// “I hurt myself today To see if I still feel I focus on the pain The only thing that's real “The needle tears a hole The old familiar sting Try to kill it all away But I remember everything “What have I become My sweetest friend Everyone I know Goes away in the end “And you could have it all My empire of dirt I will let you down I will make you hurt…” Hurt: Johnny Cash: American IV: The Man Comes Around: 2002 Ponyville: The Prancing Pony: Rainbow, not for the first time within the past week found herself sitting at Berry’s bartop drinking away the pain and the hurt. The news of her dead mother still swamped all of her thoughts, and she tried to bury those with alcohol and tears of her own; devoid of any sense of courage or bravery. As soon as one pint went down, another just appeared before her. “Rainbow,” Berry said softly, as she placed a worried hoof on the prismatic maned pegasus’s shoulder. “I’m getting worried. It’s been like this for the past few days. You come down from your room, drink your troubles away, and then the cycle repeats. You need help!” Rainbow looked up at her, her mane a complete mess. “Why should I give a flying fuck?!” the pegasus slurred out, slamming her hoof sloppily over the table.. “Not like it matters anyways… I lose everyone in the end, we all do,” She threw her head back towards the counter. “Hell, I screw up all of my relationships, Just ask Gilda, my daughter or my mother. They could all tell you the same. I’ve screwed up my relationships with them at one point or another. I deserve this, you hear?” She took another pint of beer from a fright-filled bartender and glugged it down rapidly. “I deserve this! I break everything I touch! Everything dies… Hell even Fluttershy and Scootaloo are going to die in the end, so why, I ask you, should I give a flying fuck?!” “Rainbow, you’re having way too much…” Berry tried to pull Rainbow’s drink away, but received a slap around the cheeks from the intoxicated pegasus. “You need to stop. Don’t make me get the staff to throw you out.” “Eh, screw ‘em. Screw everyone, am I right?” Rainbow let out a monstrous belch, filling the air with her beer breath. “We all die sooner or later. Might as well join mom while it’s still fresh, right?” “Rainbow, if you excuse my language,” Berry replied, her voice a tranquil fury. “You are an asshole. I gave up drinking a long time ago after I saw how it nearly ruined my relationship with my daughter, Ruby Pinch. One day, I came home drunk as a skunk and shouting at her when she accidentally broke my favorite vase after getting too rowdy in her playing, and I nearly hit her! Hit my own daughter! Do you understand what I’m getting at here? You, if you’re not careful, I can see you going down the same path and doing the same with your own family. Hurting them! Hell, that’s what you’re doing right now by stayin’ here and drinkin’ your troubles away!” she roared. “Family? Hah!” Rainbow finished her drink. “What family do I have now that my mom’s DEAD?!” She spat in Berry’s face. “Your parents are probably dead as well, Berry. Just admit it!” She let out another belch. That really did it, and Berry lunged across the countertop and began punching Rainbow in the face with a shriek of “How dare you!?!” Now, if it wasn’t before, everypony’s attention was drawn to the enveloping chaos surrounding them. Like a trainwreck in progress, no-one could dare to look away from the ensuing scene. Despite how groggy she was, Rainbow still fought back against Berry, pushing her off of her chest and smashing her body into the bar, breaking all of the bottles behind the desk and spilling the contents all over her and the bartender. “Bar fight!” A random pony called out, before everyone started to battle each other, sending kicks and punches to each other as generalized pandemonium ensued. Discord, in his pre-reformation days, would have been proud of the scene really. Hell, Rainbow probably already had been “Discorded” in a way, and was pretty much rejecting her own Element. “You think anyone gives a shit about any of our problems?! Huh?!” Rainbow socked Berry across the jaw and threw her into a table, collapsing it under her weight. “We all suffer every day, and NOPONY comes to help us! My mom is gone, because NO-ONE HELPED HER!” Rainbow roared back in fury, not even thinking that there was the possibility that someone could have been watching. Someone that knew her, and someone that cared for her. But sure enough, Fluttershy was in the room hiding behind a keg scared for her life. Scared of Rainbow, in fact. “Rainbow… w-why?” she whispered to herself. She’d come to the bar, having a sad, sneaking suspicion that was where Rainbow had gone and despite hoping it was hardly true, her fears turned out be more than just that. They were quite real. Seeing Rainbow lose complete control over herself, and hearing what she was saying, essentially having a death wish… It scared her. And that was something she never wanted to feel from her wife, pure fear of her. As she watched, the fight only began to get more brutal as glasses and tankards were thrown, along with punches and kicks. Words were said, none of which could probably be taken back. In all honesty, it was absolute madness and mayhem personified in a form other than a certain chaos spirit. Fluttershy honestly was torn from breaking down in tears, and taking Rainbow and shouting furiously at her over how much of a fool she was being, throwing her entire life away like this and probably alienating her entire circle of friendships and ruining her reputation. Unknown to anyone, far away in the Everfree Forest, a red bulb with a lightning bolt symbol inside it on a tree made of pure solid crystal shattered into pieces. Berry then decided to headbutt Rainbow. “What she had… no one could have helped her. Heart problems like that… They’re only a matter of time before they get to you. Best thing Windy could have done, was take her life slow and not stress herself…” “I have the right to act as I want! And if that means that I wanna die right now and join mom, then that means I want to die and I WILL die just to see her again!” Rainbow rammed into Berry, smashing her into two buff stallions and knocking them out. Another stallion sighed, and just took a swig of his drink at all of this. Probably just another day in Ponyville for him. Whole town was crazy anyhow, as the song went. Berry, wiping blood away from her mouth, -Lip was probably busted- shouted: “Security!” and then punched a swaying Rainbow in the face, knocking her out. “Fine by me, world’s better off without you and your foolishness right now anyways…” Berry thought. Rainbow, unable to fight back any longer, blacked out just as security arrived on the scene to take her out of the bar. She could barely even feel them lifting her up and throwing her out the front door in quite unceremonious fashion, as blood leaked out of her mouth and nose. This was then accompanied by the rain pouring down over her, washing away all of the blood that she was quickly losing down into drains and into the muddy streets. The Next Morning: Rainbow, groaning, awoke to the biggest splitting headache she’d ever had in her life. Whether that was to the fight she was in last night, or the hangover, she wasn’t sure. “Celestia…” Rainbow murmured to herself. “What the Hell happened last night?” She tried to stand up, but just wobbled and lurched around like something out of a horror movie just trying to get into a kneeling pose. As she collapsed to the ground, she saw a silhouette of a pony walk up to her. She couldn’t make out who it was though, and blacked out again as the pain from her drunken bar fight resurfaced. “Sweet Celestia, Rainbow Dash! Where the hell have you been?!” Auntie Holiday approached, using her hooves to lift Rainbow up off of the ground and onto her back. “Me and the others were worried sick after you lost your mom!” Rainbow let out only a moan in response, the sheer stench of beer wafting off of her giving Holiday her answer. “You’re terrible, y’know that?” Holiday wafted a hoof in front of her nose to dispel the alcoholic air. “I saw Berry Punch this morning and she looked completely devastated about the whole thing. You can’t keep on drinking like this just because your mom died. It’s not good for you, or the rest of Equestria.” “What good is the world when I don’t even…” She couldn’t even muster up the rest of the sentence and just mumbled incorrigible gibberish. “Rainbow. I’m taking you back to Ponyville and you’re gonna get straightened out by your friends,” Holiday patted Rainbow’s head as the intoxicated pegasus struggled to stay awake. “You need this. Even if it doesn’t look like you want it, this is for your greater good. You can’t mourn losses with endless drinks at the bar, after all.” Holiday looked skywards, and wondered aloud: “What the Hell am I going to tell the Wonderbolts about this? Celestia knows she’s supposed to show up for their weekly practice, after all…” she murmured. “Everyone hates me, don’t they?” Rainbow finally mustered up before falling back asleep; fighting tooth and claw to shake off the heavy hangover. “Probably,” Holiday said bluntly, straight and to the point as ever. “Sorry, but that’s probably the cold hard truth right now…” “Nnngh…” Rainbow couldn’t hold it any longer and passed out once more, entering a catatonic state that most other ponies wouldn’t be able to wake from if they’d had as much beer as her, mumbling nonsense under her breath. “Mommy? Where am I? Where are my friends?” Holiday honestly felt her heart break for the younger pegasus right then and there. Rainbow wanted, wanted to regress back into a younger state of mind, back when everything was so innocent and pure for her, back when the world was alright. (Mind you, that was far from the real truth. If Holiday knew what Rainbow’s father was like and had met him when he was still alive, her heart would probably shatter even more.) Given everything that Rainbow had gone through herself, she couldn’t find any other solution to her predicament other than suicide. As much as she wanted to go back in time and find a cure for her mom’s ailments—or at least, a way to make sure that she didn’t overwork herself to death—that was completely impossible. Instead, all that she could focus on was her younger days, before she got her Cutie Mark, back when her only companions were Gilda and Fluttershy, back before she met Twilight and her friends, and before any of the bad stuff happened to her. “Celestia above Rainbow…” Holiday muttered as she took the younger pegasus to Twilight’s Castle, and knocked on the door. “How… how just can I help you? You’re family now, even if you’re a terrible example of it at times… Twilight, I hope you can help me because by Celestia I don’t know what to do right now…” The door was opened, and Twilight’s jaw dropped in shock when she saw the state of Rainbow. “R-Rainbow, what happened to you?” Twilight stammered out, when she saw her friend. Her eyes narrowed at Holiday. “Explain, now.” she growled out with a unexpected ferocity. “I wanna ride my little horsey toy…” Rainbow mumbled as she collapsed off of Holiday’s back and slumped like a ragdoll before her. “Can you lift me up, mommy?” “I just found her at the Prancing Pony bar, completely gone from it all.” Holiday patted Rainbow’s head tenderly. “She’s been drinking nonstop since Windy Whistles died and she doesn’t want to believe it at all...” Holiday trailed off, barely fighting back tears. Twilight tried to find words, but found none at all, and instead collapsed in a dead faint. She was soon revived, and placed in a armchair. “This whole thing’s been terrible for her. I hope that you and your friends can fix her before she goes too far…” Holiday gave the slumbering Rainbow Dash to Twilight. “I like Rainbow Dash, stupid as she is. I really do. Scootaloo seemed to love her as well. So, please, Twilight. You and your friends have to save her,” “I want to, Holiday,” Twilight replied. “I… I just don’t know how….” she trailed off before becoming lost in thought. “Perhaps, yes… Yes, that could work… I need to find her though....” she murmured. “Find who?” Holiday asked, lifting a brow. “Gilda. She was, and still is one of Rainbow’s two best friends from childhood. If anyone knows how to help, it’ll be her. Also, I think I should get into contact with Spitfire and inform her of the situation at hoof here…” Twilight explained. She, at once, went for her quills and began writing down letters, tears falling down her face with every word. Sadly, Spike was helping Ember over in the Dragonlands at the moment, so he wasn’t around for the usual spell so Twilight had to perform it herself. With a flash of fire, the letters were sent off to their destinations, and now Twilight could only sit and wait… Griffonstone: Gilda’s Hut: Gilda sighed to herself, and let out a small sniffle as she picked up a picture of her and Windy smiling. Knowing that it would be the last time she would ever see her, she hugged the picture to her chest with her wings. Outside a window, a blue feathered griffon, about maybe thirteen or so flew by the home. “Goddamnit…” Gilda snarled, as she placed the picture back on it’s perch on the shelf. “Why now, Windy? Why’d you have to die on us like that? I… I wanted us to get married, have kids of our own, and let you raise a child in a proper environment, not the one that that damned husband of yours let Rainbow grow up in!” she snarled out softly. The clock in her house ticked on, and Gilda knew full well that there would be no way to bring her back. Unfurling her wings, she went out of her house in Griffonstone and flew off, hoping that a quick fly would help try and ease the pain a bit. Suddenly, she smacked right into a small, dark gray form. Another griffon, with the daily mail in her bags and a wooden shield on said bags. Gabby, if Gilda remembered correctly. “Gabby! Watch where you’re going, dingus!” Gilda snapped, throwing her claws down. “I’m… I’m sorry,” Gabby squeaked out, in terror of the older griffon. “Look. Unless you have something good for me, I don’t really wanna hear it right now!” She spat, her wingbeat increasing with every second. “It’s… It’s a letter for you,” Gabby stammered out quickly. “Right from Princess Twilight! Didn’t look at it, but it looks real bad. She actually seemed to be crying while writing it!” “Did her wimpy princess tears get all over it?” Gilda ripped the letter open, feeling some lightly damp spots on the actual letter itself. “Figures.” Gilda’s beak dropped at what she saw on the letter, and her eyes widened. “I… I gotta get going. Sorry Gabby, but a friend needs me!” Gilda said quickly, and rocketed off at a speed that would have made Rainbow herself proud. The letter slowly dropped to the ground, and curiously, Gabby picked it up. Here’s what it said. Dear Gilda. “I… I don’t know how I can say this without keeping a straight face, but… Rainbow Dash has changed. “She spends all of the time away from me and my friends in Celestia-knows-where doing Celestia-knows-what. Just recently, she was found at the Prancing Pony tavern, completely wasted and out of it. I was practically in shambles when I saw her this morning… “I’m not sure if she can survive another day if she keeps up this destructive downward spiral she’s in. The Wonderbolts are coming as we speak to have a talk with her, and I fear the worst. Please, Gilda. She needs some friendly support right now. Not just from me, but from all of her friends. She’s never going to accept that her mom’s dead, and only we have the power to change her mind. I’ve already contacted Spitfire, and she’s… hopefully going to help as well. God knows she needs the support of her Captain and her team as well. “Please… Just please, get here as fast as you can…” Sincerely yours, Princess Twilight Sparkle. Gabby’s eyes, even as they watered up with tears, whispered a silent prayer. “Be safe Gilda, be safe. And help Rainbow please, her daughter’s one of my best friends…” Cloudsdale: Wonderbolts Academy: Spitfire was out on the training field of the Wonderbolts Academy, observing as all of the new recruits zipped and soared through the air, trying to best each others’ times or work together in tandem to bust clouds and perform tricks. Knowing how big a responsibility being a Wonderbolt was, she knew that the recruits had to be trained long and hard before they were even able to don a Wonderbolt coat. She was so enraptured with the recruits that she barely even noticed her twin sister, Blaze—who had a similar manecut and color to her own except without the yellow detailing—flew up to her side with a scroll in her mouth. “Blaze,” Spitfire said, noting her sister’s state, sweating and seemingly out of breath. Normally, this wasn’t that strange, but Blaze seemed even more worked up than usual for a ‘Bolt. “What’s up?” she asked, taking off her trademark sunglasses to look at her sister more closely. “You…” Blaze panted out, dropping the scroll. “You need to read this. It’s… It’s about Rainbow!” Spitfire’s eyes shot wide open at that, noting how scared her sister sounded. She grabbed the scroll in an instant and read through it, her amber orange eyes darting right and left. “Dear Captain Spitfire: “I… I don’t know how to say this without breaking down, but you need to get here fast, and I mean really fast. It’s Rainbow, ever since her mom died, she’s… Oh, how do I say this? “Screw it. Her life, it’s gone down into a death spiral, and I do mean that. For the past few days, she’s been drinking right and left in a bar in Ponyville. Friend of hers, Holiday found her out on the street nearly unconscious. “There’s no easy way to say this, but Rainbow WANTS to die. She doesn’t care about life anymore, she just wants to join her mom. So… So please, get here as soon as you can, she needs all the support you can get. I’ve already contacted one of her fillyhood friends, that griffon you wanted for your team, Gilda. She’s hopefully on her way as we speak.” Wishing and praying, Princess Twilight Sparkle Spitfire shot up from her chair within less than a second, and turned to Blaze. “Tell Soarin he needs to take over for the week, and then come with me. We never leave one of our own in the dust, and I’m sure as Hell not breaking the rule today!” “Yes, ma’am!” Blaze responded before dashing off as Spitfire broke into a gallop, and as soon as she was out the front door, took to the skies and rocketed towards Ponyville… Princess Twilight’s Castle: Rainbow Dash slurred around in Twilight’s armchair, deeper into her mental dead zone. She was too far gone into thinking about Windy and now it was playing havoc with her body as well. All of her other friends just watched as she sat there, moaning and groaning, like she was a vegetable. Pinkie’s hair had deflated, and she was far from her usual bubbly self. “What do we do?” Rarity was the first to break the silence. “We can’t just leave her like this, can we?” “I don’t know…” Pinkie murmured in an almost emotionless tone of voice. “I… I really don’t know.” Heartbreakingly, Tank sat by Rainbow’s side, but even when he nudged his owner, she didn’t even acknowledge his presence. “Dear Celestia, I’m just glad Scootaloo isn’t around to see this…” Rarity whispered, wiping away her tears with a handkerchief. “Yes, ya made a wise choice telling her to visit Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle for the day, Rares…” Applejack said sorrowfully, hating to see her best friend/rival like this. Out of rage and frustration for not being able to do anything to help, she punched a wall, cracking it slightly. “I still can’t believe how far she’s taken it all…” Fluttershy stared at the wreck of a pony that was once her friend. “Are we… still friends after all of this? Or will Dash only drag us down with her?” “I… I don’t know dear, I really don’t.” Holiday said to her friend, rubbing her shoulders comfortingly, much like she would do with her own wife when Lofty was upset. Suddenly, a sound like a sonic boom was heard from outside, followed by the roaring of jets. It could only be pegasi, closing in on the castle. “They… They actually came…” Twilight whispered in shock and rushed outside followed by her friends to see the Wonderbolts landing nearby. One of the ‘Bolts with Spitfire had a suspicious resemblance to Pinkie, looking like a white furred, yellow maned pegasus version of her. “A-Auntie Surprise?” Pinkie asked in shock. “Hey, Pinkie,” Surprise looked chipper, but her voice said otherwise. “I came as soon as I heard about Crash. How… How bad is it?” she asked, not having been completely informed of the seriousness of the situation. She just knew Rainbow was in trouble, and that was that. “It’s pretty bad, Auntie,” Pinkie’s hair wouldn’t inflate again. “She’s been fast asleep for an awfully long time now.” “Let me see her,” another voice said, again familiar and the crowd of pegasi and ponies parted to reveal Gilda walking up. There was another crowd as well, the paparazzi. They’d come as soon as the Wonderbolts had landed, and as ever were hoping to get snapshots and interviews, the vultures. “Get outta here, bozos!” Gilda screeched and unfurled her wings at the camera-happy ponies. Everyone knew what was coming next, and on instinct, Fluttershy used her wings to cover her ears. “This is something personal!” With that, she sent them scrambling with a good old-fashioned griffon battle roar. With a snarl, she marched into the Castle, only to stop dead in her tracks when she saw Rainbow. She whirled on Rainbow’s friends. “And none of you saw this happening until right now!?!” she bellowed in rage and fury. “Seriously, Rainbow drinking and drinking, and none of you noticed this until she was found out on the street nearly dead?!” “Rainbow hadn’t spoken to any of us for days after her mother died,” Twilight approached Gilda sternly, with a hint of caution. You didn’t just walk up to an angry griffon and chew them out after all. It was pretty much asking to have your face slashed open, really. “It was like she disappeared off of the face of Equestria!” “Why I oughta… Some friends you are…” Gilda growled out, looking ready to punch someone, until Spitfire stopped her. “Hold it, both of you. This isn’t the time to be fighting, and you know it,” she said sternly, in full Wonderbolt Captain mode. “Now, I know we’re all hurting, but we’re supposed to be helping Rainbow, not trying to kill each other.” “Spitfire, as much as I’d love to help Dash right now, she nearly died of an alcohol overdose!” Gilda tipped her claws towards the doors of the castle. “How would the fans of the Wonderbolts react when one of their own is drunk as a skunk?” “So, you’re saying we care about our own reputation more than our members, is that it? That's why you think we’re here?” Blaze hissed out, showing her fiery temper and the reason behind her naming. “Cool it! Geez!” Spitfire just stomped off, leaving her cadets behind with Gilda. “We’re gonna get nowhere at this rate…” “Oh, this is not going good…” Pinkie murmured, her hair deflating even more. “S-Spitfire, wait!” Twilight stammered out. Everyone else just went back inside, with Gilda and Twilight being the last ones to follow. “Oh Celestia, what do we do now…?” Twilight whispered, and Gilda put a claw on her shoulder in a rare showing of kindness. “Just hope and pray Princess, just hope and pray…” She replied, and Twilight looked at her in shock. “Windy really did have an effect on you, didn’t she? The Gilda I knew… She’d never be like this.” “Yeah, I suppose she did. I suppose she did…” Gilda sighed sadly, when she heard a low groan and her, along with Fluttershy’s attentions turned to Rainbow as her eyes slowly opened. “Oh. Hey, everyone…” Rainbow Dash couldn’t even find the strength to muster up their names. “Look at me. The famous Rainbow Dash, ruined forever because of some parents…” she groaned out, basically admitting it wasn’t just her mother’s death that drove her to this, but her father’s propensity for drinking as well. “Guess dear old dad was right all along, I do break everything I touch.” “Don’t say that, Rainbow,” Fluttershy’s hair drooped down over her face. “This isn’t you. You’re not yourself right now.” “Yeah, like you really believe that Flutters…” Rainbow muttered in self-disgust. “Since when have I ever been the best wife?” “You’ve just been heartbroken ever since your mom passed away.” Twilight stepped forward. “And you’re letting that mold you into an entirely different pony. Please, Rainbow Dash. Don’t do this to yourself anymore…” “I… I don’t know what I’ll do anymore. Right now, I just want to crawl into a hole and die…” Rainbow muttered. “Rainbow Dash…” Spitfire stepped forward next. “What have you become?” “I… I honestly don’t know, and that scares me,” Rainbow admitted. “I’m certainly not the Rainbow Dash, Element of Loyalty anymore. I felt it… I felt my own Element abandon me just because of the way I’ve been acting. I’m acting disloyal to my friends, to my own mother’s memory for Celestia and Luna’s sake!” “Rainbow… Is there any way that we can make this all better?” Spitfire asked. “We can’t have a Wonderbolt with low morale on the team. It’d just hurt everyone else’s morale all at once.” “I… I honestly don’t know.” Rainbow muttered. “I’d say that you’d need some more time alone, but it doesn’t seem like you’re taking that too well. And yet, at the same time, having you with us might not garner the effect we want either...” Rarity paced back and forth. “I don’t know, Rainbow Dash. You really are putting us between a rock and a hard place.” “Well, maybe I just-” Before Rainbow could finish, Rarity continued. “And before you say you need time to yourself, that’s not true. That’s obviously not going to work. I think… I think you need to spend time with your daughter, give yourself a reason to live again.” “Oh gods…” Rainbow realized. “Scootaloo. What’ll she think of me now? I’m an even worse mom than when I left her with Icy Winds and Last Drop!” “Well, it certainly can’t be any worse than what you’re in now, Crash. I say go for it.” Gilda had a cold glare that could shatter diamonds. She knew Rainbow’s childhood nickname would get her angry enough to follow through with Gilda’s wishes. “Spend some time with the kid. She deserves it. And so do you.” “You’re… You’re absolutely right. Thanks, Gils.” Rainbow smiled. “What I’m here for, to give you a swift kick up the ass when needed.” Gilda smiled. “Can… Can we be alone for a minute?” Fluttershy asked, and everyone nodded before leaving the two to their privacy. Once Fluttershy and Rainbow were alone together, Flutters gave her wife an icy cold glare. “What were you thinking?” Fluttershy asked. “I… I wasn’t…” Rainbow admitted. “Exactly,” Fluttershy responded. “I… I saw you in the bar fight, and it scared me beyond belief, knowing you could get like that.” “You saw that?!” Rainbow looked mortified, to know that her wife had seen her in such a monstrous state. “Fluttershy, I was drunk! There’s a huge difference between drunk mad and regular mad!” “But it scared me nonetheless. I’m… I’m sorry Rainbow, but I can’t be around you right now…” Fluttershy whispered, tears in her eyes before she gave Rainbow a last glance and left the room. “W-What? Why?” “I’m not so sure in our relationship anymore,” Fluttershy was still stoic, but a part of her voice cracked, as if it signaled her broken heart splitting wider. “Where do we go from here, Rainbow? Tell me.” she asked herself, leaving Rainbow alone to think. And to cry.