//------------------------------//
// Chapter 11: Eye of the Tiger 
// Story: Jack Stone in Equestria 
// by Dark Chocolate 
//------------------------------//

Cadence cries out in pain, as her newest eyebrow piercing is caught on a palace curtain. She timidly tries to pull it loose but gives up after the pain is unbearable. Jack Stone walks up. “Don’t worry Princess, I’ll save you!” Jack crouches down next to her, and pulls out his pistol

Cadence looks at him in horror.
“Don’t you dare!”
Jack points his gun at the piercing.
“Don’t worry, I’ll just shoot away the fabric and you’ll be fine!” Cadence backs up the best she can.


“That’s not going to work, just go away!”
Jack sighs.
“Okay calm down or I’m going to miss. Are you ready?”
Cadence shakes her head.
Jack does his best to sound soothing.
“One...two…”
Cadence closes her eyes, with her mouth trembling.
A tiger leaps out from behind a second set of curtains, pouncing on Jack and starts mauling him viciously. Jack cries out, trying to guard his head from the tiger’s claws. It claws his arms a few times, before chewing on his ankle. The tiger gets off and casually walks outside. Jack Stone slowly gets to his feet, with his clothing shredded.
An oddly placed radio against the wall, squeals to life.
“All units, all units! Robbery in progress on 17th and Fancis! Suspect is armed and dangerous!”
Jack gets up valiantly.
“Alright Cadence! Time to move!”
Cadence holds up her front hooves defensively.
“Hold on, let me find a foalsitter!”

Cadence sighs before opening the door to Celestia’s room. Celestia lays on her side, with a pack of cigarettes. She takes a long drag, watching Cadence as she enters.
“Celestia, I’m sorry I know you never get free time but I need a foalsitt-”
Celestia uses her magic to put the cigarette out on her flank. She bites her lip and closes her eyes as her legs dig into her bed.
“Mmmmmmm yes, god yes! That’s what Tia likes!” Cadence’s mouth trembles in horror.
“I...I need a foalsitter for tonight if you can watch her for just a few hours-”
Celestia lights up a fresh cigarette, takes another long drag and lifts her top leg into the air.
“You Mr.Cigarette are going where the sun don’t shine!”
Cadence whirls around and yells “Nope!” before storming out.
Celestia runs after her and they catch up in the throne room.
“Oh come now Cadence, I can handle Flurryheart for just a few hours!” Cadence turns around angrily and stomps a hoof.
“NO! YOU’RE A TOTAL WEIRDO!”
Celestia rolls her eyes and leans over to Luna.
“There she goes, screaming in caps lock again.”
Luna sighs with annoyance.
“I hate it when she does that.”
Cadence starts trotting off again. Celestia runs over and puts a reassuring foreleg over her back.
“That was just aunt Celestia’s private time! You know I’d never do anything wrong to Flurryheart!” Cadence stops and hangs her head. Celestia keeps stroking her back before slowly narrowing her eyes and smiling.
“Have um...you ever been with a mare before?” She asks slowly and eagerly. Cadence whirls around angrily.
“This is exactly what I’m talking about! If you had a pair of testicles, I’d kick you in them!”
Celestia’s face slowly forms a grin.
“That can be arranged…” she says seductively. Cadence screams with anger before running over and decking Jack Stone SUPER COP! In the twig and berries.

Cadence looks in the backseat of Jacks’ cruiser as they drive down the road.
“Jack, why do you have four jars that have a gallon of peanut butter in them?” She asks suspiciously. Jack swallows.
“I...I like sandwiches?” He says, while avoiding looking Cadence in the eyes. I mean...he is driving so. Cadence picks up a flier on the floor of the passenger seat.
“And whats with this flier for being locked in a room with a dozen puppies?” She says nervously. Jack grabs the paper from her and shoves it in his pocket.
“Look, I don’t asks you about your business, don’t ask about mine!”
Jack skids to a stop in front of a hospital.
“We’re here.” Cadence stares at the hospital, before looking across the street at a gas station with several cop cars around it.
“Um...pretty sure it’s the gas station.” Jack Stone opens his door.
“Nope. This is it.” Jack Stone stops in front of the sliding glass doors and tries to kick them in. As they open, Jack's foot sails harmlessly between them. He falls to the ground, unintentionally doing the splits then holds his knee in pain. He rolls around screaming in pain.
“Damn terrorists! What will they think of next?!” He looks up after hearing screams coming from a back room. He leaps to his feet and bolts down the hallway. He enters a room with two surgeons in scrubs and facemasks. Jack pulls out his pistol.
“Freeze criminals!” The two surgeons stare at him in shock. Jack Stone glares angrily at them.
“I’m getting this man out of here and you’d better not get in the way!” One of the surgeons looks at the other before she speaks.
“You can’t move him, he’s on life support!” Jack looks over at the machines and snorts.
“Or maybe you’re doing some sick experiment with cyborgs! Now stay out of the way!” Jack takes two steps forward. The other surgeon steps in front of him and holds his hands up timidly.
“We won’t let you kill this man!” Jack cocks an eyebrow and smirks.
“Oh really? How do you feel about...this!” Jack pulls out a cross and holds it up to the surgeon confidently. The surgeon looks at the cross for a moment.
“Wh...we’re not vampires you idiot!” Jack nods arrogantly.
“Ah, well then I’m sure you won’t have a problem with mace...that has silver in it!” He whips out a mysterious can and sprays both the surgeons in the eyes, who grab their faces and fall to the floor screaming.
“Ha! Nice try you undead freaks!” Jack Stone grabs the man on the gurney around the midsection and hoists him onto his shoulder. The machines let out sharp, loud beeps as he rips the man free. Jack Stone goes to the door and turns around dramatically.
“Assimilate this.” Jack pulls out his pistol and shoots both the monitors, that explode in a cloud of smoke and sparks.
Jack walks out of the room and looks down the hall to his left. Several staff members stare at him, all with facemasks.
“Damn! It must be a hive! I have to find the queen and take her out!” Jack Stone runs to the stareway on his right. He takes one step up and looks at the man on his shoulder.
“Sorry buddy, gotta save the world and I’ll need every ounce of speed I can get!” He lets the man slide off his shoulder, who then proceeds to slump over to the descending stairs and tumbles down them.
Jack races up a few flights and plants himself against the wall next to the door. He peers out into the hallway before doing a front roll and drawing his gun. He looks at three closed doors as Cadence runs up while panting from behind.
“Jack! We...we have to go! There’s some nutjob shooting up this hospital!”
Jack smiles while strokes his chin with the tip of his pistol.
“So logic suggests that the criminal has to...be in door two!” Jack reaches forward with a triumphant grin and kicks in the door to room 302.. He sighs, “Aw crap.”
A tiger jumps out from the box, pins Jack to the ground, and begins clawing and biting him. Cadence cocks an eyebrow and looks down at Jack. “Wow that tiger really doesn’t like you…”
The tiger walks away and Jack slowly gets back up. Cadence cocks an eyebrow.
“What the hell did you do to that make it hate you so much?” Jack Stone shrugs.
“I have no idea!”

One Year Ago

A lone bangel tiger sits in her enclosure at the zoo. She sighs with annoyance and tries to block out the random douchebag outside. Jack Stone does large, slow, unnecessary lunges a few feet away from the bars.
“Wow look at all this freedom I have! I can do whatever I want, even look at a stupid tiger!” The tiger rolls her eyes.

The tiger looks behind her when she hears someone shuffling. Jack Stone pelvic thrusts repeatedly, with the top of a steak hanging over his pants.
“Common, don’t you like your meat seasoned?” He says while smirking and thrusting his hips in every direction.
Later that day, the zookeeper comes into her habitat and drops off some meat, then quickly exits. As the tiger enjoys her meal, the creaking of the door draws her attention. Her eyes widen as she realises the zookeeper forgot to close it. She looks around nervously before slowly creeping closer to the door. Her ears perk up as she hears Jack Stone’s voice.
“Um excuse me sir, you forgot to close the door.” She hears the zookeeper’s grateful and surprised voice.
“Oh thank you sir! We certainly wouldn’t want her getting out!” The zookeeper walks back in, grabs the door and quickly closes it. The tiger runs up to the door and claws at it while roaring angrily.

Later that night, a security guard is walking along his path with a flashlight. He shines it left and right before being suddenly pulled into a bush by the tiger wearing all black clothing and a skimask. All that can be heard is mumbled cries of help, followed by several punches. The tiger leaps out of the bushes wearing the security guard outfit now. She walks along the same path and passes another guard. The guard looks down at her and waves.
“Hey Karl.” The tiger nods and lets out a casual growl in response. The guard continues walking. Another lone guard sits inside of a guard shack, with a box of donuts as he watches the security cameras. A tiger in a security guard outfit sneaks up behind him and snaps his neck. She types on the keyboard and watches as the harddrive for their security network gets deleted.
One last guard sits at the entrance, reading a magazine. She miraculously doesn’t notice a grappling hook being thrown over the wall to her right. A tiger runs forward, climbs the rope and jumps over the fence. She lands on the outside of the wall, lifts her head to the cool night air, closes her eyes and inhales at the sweet smell of freedom.
She jumps as the jingle of an icecream truck speeding down the road catches her off guard. She looks at it and focuses her ears towards it. She hears two voices coming from it. A female voice cries out with annoyance.
“Who the hell picks an icecream van to use in a high speed chase?!” She hears Jack’s voice immediately follow.
“Um an absolute badass that’s who!” The tiger glares at the truck and pulls out a switchblade. A security guard walks out of the zoo, stops and stares at the tiger.
“Oh hey Karl. A bunch of us are gonna get drunk and play pingpong, wanna come?” The tiger stares at him confused, before shrugging and following the zookeeper to his car.