//------------------------------// // Sorry...What? I couldn't hear you over my panic screaming! // Story: I am Cinema! (Aka Educating Ponies on Real Entertainment) // by Quake98 //------------------------------// Alright, stop me if you heard this one before. 'Human has an unusual encounter with a mer'- yeah that didn't last long. Don't worry this isn't one of those stories, nope. It's just about me showing some little ponies movies that I have and how they react to them. None of that 'chosen one saves the day' or 'stopping the apocalypse' scenarios here, just friends enjoying a nice film or video game. Now at this point you all probably have a lot of questions about how I came to be in none other than Equstria, considering they are the only ponies anyone ever talked about if the words 'ponies' and 'world' are ever brought into a single sentence. Well, considering you are all still hear after listening to my blabbering then I will but I warn you... It's really simple, nothing to epic. It was kinda a let down now that I think back about it, must have been an off day for that mismatched misfit. Any who it all started with me sitting at my computer... One Year Earlier What I was doing on my computer was what any average 19 year old would do, look at movies from the past to the present, seeing which ones could garner my interest. Oh sure there was the good old classic slasher where a roughly six foot tall, deformed mamas boy tried to hack up a bunch of horny, stupid teens for their poor choice of camps. That movie franchise always seemed to bring a smile to my face when I saw the unique to corny kills. Scrolling through the articles about the movie and it's productions I was pleasantly surprised when I heard a soft little Spriong sound, kinda like a metal spring from every cartoon ever. An email, for moi? I hardly get any emails, considering I made it automatically dump spam into my junk box. With a mixture of curiosity and excitement I opened up my email to see what it could say, maybe it was an email notifying me that I am going to inherit something form some elusive family member that has croaked or something along those lines. With no hesitation I opened the email to see.... A survey.... About My Little Ponies: Friendship is Magic. Raising an eyebrow at the weird email, I couldn't help but wonder the following question, how did I even get this thing? With a mental shrug and curiosity peaked I decided to take this mysterious survey to see what it was all about. It started out normally, asking basic questions such as favorite color, food, hobby etc. About half way through the survey however it start to get really weird, what I would do if I was in Equstria, would I cause any mischief if I could, would I be a pony? Heck no to that last one, why would I want to be a pony? I'm rather happy as my all natural human-self. There was one final question that made me pause to pander. 'Would you Like to go to Equstria and if so, what would you take with you if you chose to go? This seriously took me at least an hour of deep contemplation, debating about what would help me if I were to go to Equstria, until I had an epiphany. I would take my house with everything inside of it with me! With a satisfied grin and a pat on the back I typed in my final answer to the survey. With a finally over finessed mouse movement I clicked on the 'submit' button. With that done I Leaned back into the swivel chair with a satisfied sigh I crossed my arms behind my head. I didn't get very long to enjoy my victory before I heard the oh so enjoyable Sproing sound alert me once more. Raising an eyebrow in surprise I leaned forward to look see a reply to the survey? "What the heck? I literally just finished your survey dude, how can you already be replying to me?" Opening up the reply I saw something that made me raise both eyebrows in surprise, the reason being? Discord...Discord was in my computer.... Ok Remain ca-screw it. "Argh! Discord! How? Why? When? And most importantly Why!?" The Discord in the monitor covered his ears with his mismatched arms and gave me an irritated glowr, "Really, I would think a human would be able to stand the sight of me without losing ones cool but that can be remedied really easily," Not even a second after he said that my room dropped from a comfortable sixty degrees Fahrenheit, (about ten degrees Celsius if you're picky about it) to a chilly negative thirty degrees Fahrenheit ( about negative twenty-two degrees). My teeth started to chatter at the sudden temperature drop. The big cheat named Discord was dressed in a parka and wearing woolly mittens. "Oh ho ho ho! Sorry to give you such a cold shoulder! But," He started to smile his grin that seemed to promise both great joy and intense terror before he continued with a flourish that I know made David Bowie turn in his grave in envy, "I need you to come with me to provide Equstria with some of your uniqueness, and expose them to some of the great delicacy of discordance that is know as the human race!" After his proclamation and spreading his arms wide, an array of fireworks went off behind him and provided a beautiful show of exploding colors. If that wasn't enough, there was fanfare going Do Do Do Do Doo! along with the colorful show. Thankfully the firework show only happened in my computer so I didn't have to worry about potential fire damage to add onto cold damage, but I wasn't worrying about that. No, I was just left in a stunned stupor from the sudden light show. Of course due to this stupor Discord was left with no answer to his request only a really awkward silence. A silence that could only grow more awkward as time continued with no reply. With an irritated huff Discord snapped his finger and instantly the parka was gone and he rubbed his eyes, "Usually, humans would jump on the opportunity this good." That snapped me out of the stupor, "Hey, you can't blaim me! I have the god of Chaos in my computer, saying he is going to take me to Equstria to show the ponies what the human race is like," I shook my head, "Sorry if my reaction is normal to seeing a Chaos god." But...I couldn't help but think about the offer he had laid out before me. 'I could go to Equstria, meet some of the cutest beings in existence, take my stuff with me, I have no friends or family I stay in regular contact...I don't see a down-side.' I grinned at Discord, "Well Discord, if you promise to bring my house with me to Equstria, and for it to have it both power and running water/plumbing then we have a deal," I reached my hand out to shake, which I immediately felt stupid for because he couldn't reach my hand. Discord's grin, that joyful terror inducing grin, returned with force as his eagle clawed hand reached out of the computer and grasped my hand, "It a deal, my friend," and I was embraced by an abrupt and blissful unconsciousness.