//------------------------------//
// Day IV 
// Story: Celestia of Equestria's tonic experiment 
// by Acologic 
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Celestia watched Tirek pace in his cell through her monitor. She watched him shout something at one of the motionless DAGs, then proceed to clunk it over the head with his foreleg. Sighing, she plunged into T-Kam. Her likeness caused the latter to jump.

‘Can’t you give me fair warning?’ he moaned. ‘My life is bad enough without you scaring me all the time!’

Celestia snorted. ‘Weren’t you singing its praises only yesterday?’

‘Yes,’ said Tirek, ‘but I’ve suffered a change of heart since. It’s so boring in here! Nothing to do! Nothing! And my only accessories are oppressive black stone and this!’

He kicked his FoodRock. Celestia pointed to his tankard. ‘And that.’

‘Yes, but that hardly counts when its only use is to hold my poison, my feelings about which have also changed.’

Celestia quickly livened up. ‘So you are feeling a difference! What is it? Pain in your stomach? Your kidneys? There aren’t any obvious physiological signs . . . perhaps I should monitor you more carefully. I wonder whether we’ve a scientist on hoof –’

‘Who needs one of those?’ Luna had rematerialized. ‘You’ve got me! And I say it again – that tonic is phoney.’

‘And I say,’ said Celestia, ‘that we shall see.’

Cadence brought up the rear. ‘How are you feeling?’

‘Marginally better,’ said Celestia, sniffing doughtily. ‘It will take more than a cold to knock me off balance.’

‘Yeah,’ said Luna. ‘The flu, and here’s hoping. A joke, Sister, that was a joke!’

‘Well,’ said Tirek loudly. ‘Any news? And please don’t disappear once I’ve drunk your medicine. I’m bored stiff. I really, really need something to do – somepony to talk to.’

‘I’ve got news,’ said Luna at once. ‘Killer Kitty’s made a lasting impression! That damned flick induced a nightmare epidemic! Overtime central up in Luna’s office, let me tell you!’

‘I’ve had it busy too,’ said Cadence. ‘Turns out our dissidents from yesterday are made of stronger stuff than I gave them credit for – and their flogging didn’t sit too well with the citizenry, it seems.’

‘I can’t say I’m surprised,’ said Tirek. ‘As the old proverb goes, if you whack the hoof that serves you, best prepare for a rough time.’

‘As far as old proverbs go,’ said Celestia, ‘that one was pretty awful – so much so that I daresay you made it up.’

‘Well. That’s me rumbled, isn’t it?’ Tirek grinned as Celestia closed her eyes and puffed out her cheeks.

‘You know,’ said Cadence gently, ‘you really do look as though you could use a massage – nothing sexual! Nothing at all like that! Just – you know, a nice, relaxing spa treatment. It’ll work wonders, I promise.’

Celestia shook her head. ‘I simply haven’t the time for such things, Cadence. And while we’re on the subject of time-wasting – get on with it, you!’

She glared at Tirek, who groaned. The DAGs filled his tankard.

‘Day four,’ said Tirek, ‘drink four. It’s like a video diary – you know, the ones you see in blockbusters. Wheeler the war hero and all that. “Day nine hundred and fourteen. Aliens raided our camp.” You know!’

No one laughed. Tirek looked slightly put out as the DAGs handed him his daily tonic.

‘Cheers,’ he said, and he downed it.

‘Aren’t you forgetting something?’ asked Celestia.

‘Oh. Yeah.’ He smacked his lips.

‘Right, people, that’s a wrap.’

Luna and Cadence pulled out of T-Kam. Celestia deliberated.

‘I’ll try to rustle you up something to do,’ she said eventually. ‘Something useful, though. I won’t have you playing cards all day with the others again.’

‘Yes! Anything! Please!’ Tirek fell to his knees. Celestia sighed again and pulled out of T-Kam.