Chapter 3: The Good, the Bad, and the Twily
The toilet flushed as Twilight returned from the back corner of her cell to the barred door. The other Elements of Harmony along with Spike all continued to stand outside the cell with their mouths agape, staring at the purple alicorn in disbelief. It was only because the purple alicorn was not the one they knew and loved, at least not at heart.
"Are you freaks gonna keep gawking even when I take a piss?" sneered Twilight in her new grouchy tone.
It took a shove from Princess Luna, causing them to fall over each other like dominoes, to snap the others from their baffled state. "She hath remained in this state ever since I discovered her defacing the castle walls with magic paint." She said. "I even was compelled to constructeth a magical barrier to keep her from fleeing custody."
"Twilight, what the heck happened to you?!" blurted Rainbow after getting back up.
"Do you not recognize us?" asked Rarity.
"Of course I do." Twilight rolled her eyes. "You're the annoying mares who get all crazy mad whenever I do any magic. Don't recognize the shrimpy dragon though. The question is why do any of you give a crap enough to visit me in the clink."
"Shrimpy?!" glared Spike, astounded. "Hey what gives, Twi?! You disappear one moment and the next you don't remember me?"
"Spike, I think this may not actually be Twilight." Fluttershy said. "Even the Narrator doesn't seem to think so."
You're right, Fluttershy. There's something strange I'm sensing from her. This Twilight doesn't seem like an impostor. And yet she looks like a complete carbon copy. It's not just the way she's speaking. There's something else that's just...alien.
"Ah great, he's here too?" griped Twilight. "Hey shut up already you freaking ghost!"
Twilight! You can still hear me! Where were you?!
"You oughta know, you omnipotent creep!" she hissed.
"Pray tell, what is happening?" asked Luna.
"Well shoot, she can still hear ol' Narry." Applejack said, matter-of-factly. "Then she's gotta be the real Twilight!"
"Now I don't believe that for a second!" objected Pinkie. "The real Twilight wouldn't be such a grouchy-pus! We'll have to test her knowledge! Say, Twilight, what color is my underwear?"
"You don't wear any." Twilight glowered.
"Wow! No pulling one over her!" Pinkie shrugged.
Twilight looked at everypony interrogatively. "And who the heck is this Narrator?" she asked. "Is this guy the reason I'm here?!"
Uh, I don't think I am...Wait, you mean you don't recognize me? What other disembodied voices do you know?!
"I don't know who or what you are, buddy," scoffed Twilight. "But you remind me too much of that invisible jerk who calls himself the Editor."
...What?
"Editor?" Rainbow responded. "Twilight, what are you even saying?!...Oh man. Narrator? Is there something we should know?"
...I was hoping it wouldn't lead to this.
"Narry?" called Rarity. "You sound strange."
I've never told this to any of you. But there is another being like me. The Editor. He's a sort of counterpart to me. I don't know where he came from any more than my own origins. But what I do know is that he will try to disrupt anything I do. Whenever I would find somepony's story to follow and chronicle, the Editor would leech off of it and create his own alternate reality, skewing every detail of the story and turning logic upside down. He distorts reality as I see it and turns it into something ugly. Needless to say...he's a real ass.
"So you mean this Editor is what made Twilight this way?" asked Fluttershy, quivering.
It seems to be the best explanation. The Editor's presence has only ever been detectable by minor glitches in reality. But now it seems his power has been unleashed tenfold, and it's caused Twilight to become completely enveloped in the Editor's own twisted rules.
"Waddya mean, Narrator?" asked Applejack. "If this two-timin' Editor guy has taken control of Twilight, how come she's still here and not in some crazy dimension?"
Look, I know everything about me has been hard to comprehend, but it's about to get a lot weirder. From what I can tell, the Editor has created an entirely new Twilight along with a new Equestria, as he is one to do. But this time, it seems he has switched the mind of our Twilight with that of his own more sinister version of her.
"Okay, you're right," said Rainbow. "This is getting more and more insane."
He has that kind of power, I'm sure of it. He can steal minds and memories and just place them in his own little dark fantasies. Therefore he is even more powerful than I am. It's made him the very bane of my very strange existence.
"Well then how can we find this meanie so we can give him a real good walloping and save our own Twilight?" asked Pinkie.
...I'm not sure. There is definitely evidence of the Editor's meddling in the real world. But he's practically untraceable, even to me. We'd have to enter his own Equestria in order to bring him to light. I'm ashamed to say that's one of the few things I just can't do.
"Then...Twilight may be corrupted by the Editor forever." Rarity said dismally, looking at her lost friend.
Twilight shook her head and turned away in a huff, having given up trying to understand the dilemma.
"Pardon me, my fair ponyfolk," said Princess Luna. "But it doth seems thou art preparing to venture forth once again into worlds beyond our own."
"I guess, Princess," said Applejack. "But I don't think ya have a portal that could get us there this time."
"Nay, but fret not!" Luna smirked. "There may yet be a source of magical power that could be of assistance. Hast thou e'er heard of...the Fate Coin?"
"Oh yeah!" beamed Pinkie. "I heard about that in the...wait, no, I have no idea what that is."
Luna explained. "There is legend of a treasured coin, imbued with the magic to manipulate all space and matter. It was enchanted by a lost wizard who prophesied Equestria falling into chaos. So he doth drained all of his own magic to give the coin power. It is said that only a flip of the coin, to the opposite side of where it may lay, will send the user to an opposite world, where chaos does not abound."
"Princess Luna," said Rarity. "Do you think this coin may in fact teleport us to the world skewed off from our own? I must say that sounds quite far fetched."
"Alas I cannot say for your present situation." Luna replied. "And even so, the coin is only a legend. But I have nary a doubt that the union of the Elements of Harmony will be able to prove this legend true. My friends, if you have any hope left of restoring our dear Twilight Sparkle, you must seek out the Fate Coin."
"...Heck yeah!" exclaimed Rainbow. "Finally, another adventure! We'll be just like Daring Do finding some mystical treasure! Let's do it! I'm up for anything!"
"Uh huh, right. And just how are you supposin' we find a lil' ol' coin that may or may not even exist?" asked Applejack, skeptical.
"According to the legend," resumed Luna. "The unknown wizard hid the Fate Coin in a secret stronghold so it may not fall into greedy hooves. It would lie somewhere on the border between the Badlands and the San Palomino Desert."
"Oh, okay, that helps." Applejack said sarcastically.
"I don't know about this." Fluttershy spoke. "I'm afraid we'll be wandering into danger all for nothing."
"...We'll do it." Spike chimed in. "We have to. It's our only shot of tracking down this Editor guy and getting him to fix Twilight. I can't stand to live with her as a completely different pony."
Hmm...the lizard's finally starting to make sense. Alright, let's go get that coin. I'm not gonna let that editing hasbeen show me up like this!
"Yeah! You heard the ghost!" shouted Rainbow, already taking to the air and speeding away. "Come on! San Palomino Desert here we come!"
"Woohoo!" cheered Pinkie as she bounced away in the same direction. "Let's flip that coin and get to that flippy floppy Equestria!"
"Wait, what about Twilight?" asked Rarity. "Should we really leave her behind?"
"I must say that is for the best." Luna told her. "In her confounded state, I fear she will only be a hindrance to your quest. But rest assured, I will look after Princess Twilight."
"Feh, like I'd want to go anyway." Twilight muttered, lying in her cot.
"Here is to seeing you reach the treasure, my friends," smiled Luna as they started out of the dungeon. "And restore balance to reality. I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST OF LUCK!"
"Quack quack quack quack quack quack quack!"
"Oh okay, Princess Celestia!" said Pinkie, as she swiped up the white duck and placed her on her back. "You can come with us! Not sure what an alicorn turned duck will do to help. But at least you're super cute now!"
"QUACK!"
You guys go on ahead...Twilight, can you still hear me?
"Ugh, duh!" she griped, holding her pillow over her head. "When can I not hear a crazy voice like you?!"
Just answer me this. What were you doing before you woke up today?
"What does it matter to you?" she replied. "I was just minding my own business, practicing a few destruction spells in the local carrot farm. And all of a sudden, everypony in town gets on my jock about hurting a few precious plants! I swear that whole place has it out for me. So I just keep teaching 'em a lesson with my magic to show how superior I am, as an alicorn after all. With this much power, I should be able to do whatever the heck I want, right? What do I give a crap about right and wrong anyway?"
...Wow, I'd hate to narrate a pony's story like that.
Twilight perused through one of her many, many books on arcane sorcery while sitting in the gloomy study of Contempt Castle. She seemed to wear a disgusted grimace on her face as she absorbed the gruesome, insidious knowledge of dark arts.
The tome she held in particular presented vivid description of the results of necromancy, a subject that most certainly would never nauseate her if she were feeling like her usual self.
"Ugh! I can't stand the thought of another me learning from this wretched sorcery." Twilight mumbled,
shaking her head. "It's a dreadful life."
Now what kind of talk is that, Twilight? This is your life! Like I said, there's no other you to speak of.
You are you and that's it.
"Uh huh," replied Twilight, shutting the book. "So you've said. But I bet that's not the whole truth. Why should I believe an entity who changes things at the drop of a hat?"
I'm not familiar with that expression. Who's dropping hats? If anypony was dropping any hats then I would know about it!
"Jeez, even Narry wasn't this dense."
Just then, Twilight startled at the sound of something pounding on glass. She turned to the window of her study to see that a tomato had splattered on the outside. Immediately she sprang up out of her chair and opened the window, looking down at the source of the ballistic vegetable.
"That's for loosening the wheels on my scooter, you crazy witch!" shouted Scootaloo from the street below, who then scampered off in a huff.
Twilight looked vexed. "Alright, that's it!" She shut the window and stormed out of the study and downstairs. "If I'm going to be stuck in this cynical Equestria, then I'm going to at least make things right. I'm going out to apologize to every single pony in town and restart making friends with them, as it should be!"
Okay, do as you like! But I can't guarantee you'll get the kind of friendship you're used to out of this world.
And don't think it'll do anything to rid yourself of my presence. I'm all-knowing after all!
Twilight smirked. "This coming from the guy who just called a tomato a vegetable instead of a fruit?"
Mmph...Crazy witch.
"Ey whaddya think yer doin'?!" rasped Crag as he entered the foyer, cigar in mouth. "You go out there an' you'll get massacred! Do I have to keep you under lock n' key or what?!"
"Sorry, my good salamander," said Twilight, quaintly. "But I'm going to start mending some bridges. And I'm not going to let this obviously newly fabricated world bring me down. Don't worry, I promise to make you happier as well when I get back."
"Feh, good luck with dat!" retorted Crag. "And changelings will fly outta my butt!"
Determined to see her mission of peace come to fruition, Twilight exited the black onyx castle. She ignored the crude, yet rude, drawings of her posted on the front door and proceeded down the street toward the center of Ponyville. Unfortunately, she only made it half a block before being detected by passersby.
"Twilight Sparkle!" yelled Daisy. "You have a lot of nerve showing your face around here, after you summoned a hoard of weevils in my garden!"
"Not to mention you mixing my toothpaste with love potion!" added Colgate.
"And replacing my bear claws with actual bear claws!" shouted Donut Joe.
"Uh oh." Twilight quivered as the locals began to close in on her.
Fearing another angry mob, Twilight summoned a dose of magic in her horn and cast her teleportation spell. Instantly she reappeared in her initial destination, the main office of the town hall. Sure enough, Mayor Mare gasped at the manifestation of the bane of her town and leaned over her desk.
"How dare you barge into my office, Twilight Sparkle!" the politician scolded. "I supposed I should add breaking and entering to your list of many misdemeanors in my town!"
"Mayor Mare, please! I only came to talk." Twilight took a deep breath to gather her words. "Look, I understand I've made a lot of mistakes in Ponyville."
"Mistakes?! Ha!" scoffed Mayor Mare. "If you could call releasing a rampaging homunculus made of tar into the Cutie Mark Day Camp a mistake!"
"Okay, okay, I did a lot of bad things on purpose." "But no more! You see, Miss Mayor, I recently had this...revelation, involving trans-dimensional rifts, that uh, showed me the error of my ways. And I am here to ask of you a request."
"Oh this ought to be good." Mayor Mare snorted. "Fine, I'll indulge you. But make it quick."
"I want to make a public announcement to every citizen in Ponyville, Mayor Mare," said Twilight. "And make a formal apology once and for all. I promise to right every wrong I've done to everypony, and possible, make some friends along the way."
"Is that so?" Mayor Mare gave her a skeptical eye. "And why should I believe you'll make good on your flimsy little promise, Sparkle?"
Twilight then produced a parchment and quill. "If I commit one more heinous act, Mayor Mare," she said. "Then I will officially enact a request for the city to immediately demolish my castle."
The mayor blinked in surprise. "You mean that big black tree thing you built where the puppy park used to be? Hmm...I suppose I have no reason to call you on your bluff."
"Trust me, Miss Mayor," continued Twilight. "I'm a changed pony. My only goal now is to bring peace and friendship to all of Equestria. That's the truth."
At that moment, Mayor Mare could see a glimmer of hope in the young alicorn's eyes. Somehow, she felt compelled to believe in her sudden, but reasonable request. She then signed the parchment. "Very well then, Miss Sparkle. I shall arrange for your announcement tomorrow morning outside town hall. But I must warn you, my dear: it could take quite some time for you to gain the trust of my town, after everything you pulled."
"You have nothing to fear, Miss Mayor." Twilight smiled like the fool she is. "What?"
Nothing!
"What?" asked Mayor Mare.
"Nothing!" replied Twilight.
"Now boarding! Four-thirty to Appleoosa!" announced the conductor.
Steam hissed from the underbelly of the small locomotive engine that afternoon. Travelling tourists awaiting in the Canterlot station flocked together and boarded the long train of passenger coaches. Among them, Spike and the five Elements of Harmony, along with a fowl princess, settled down in their car anxious to embark on yet another harrowing adventure. Tension stood as they all sat in their benches and reviewed the situation.
"Do you really think your cousin will help us locate the Fate Coin, Applejack?" asked Fluttershy.
"Well I can't say he's heard o' the thing." Applejack shrugged. "But I don't know anypony who can navigate the desert better than Braeburn. If this magic coin is somewhere in the Badlands, I'll be darned if he don't get us there."
"I gotta be honest, it feels weird going on an adventure like this without Twi." Rainbow sulked. "If she knew about finding some cool mystical treasure, she'd be all over it! But without her we're just plowing forward without a real plan."
"Not to worry, girls!" added Rarity. "Princess Luna was kind enough to lend me this book on fabled treasures. She said there is an entire section on the Fate Coin. Twilight may not be with us, at least in the way we'd want her, but we can at least think like her."
"Yeah! And with Princess Celestia duckified," said Pinkie. "Anything is possible!"
"Quack!" said Celestia, eating bread crumbs out of Pinkie's hoof.
"Does anypony get the feeling that she's trying to tell us something?" pondered Rainbow.
"Maybe she's really hungry for some celery!" beamed Applejack.
"AJ, stop pushing your crummy celery on us!" sneered Rainbow.
"Honestly, Applejack!" scoffed Rarity. "I have no qualm with celery in the first place, but somehow you're making it sound quire unappetizing."
"Yer all just jealous cuz I got a real versatile crop that'll make mah family rich!" retorted Applejack. "An' just to prove it to ya, I'm gonna sell mah cart o' celery to every pony on this train!"
"Um, Applejack," said Fluttershy meekly. "About that. When I said I'd stow your celery on the luggage car for you...um, I actually got rid of it."
"You WHAT?!" exclaimed Applejack. "Fluttershy, ya threw away mah livelihood?!"
"Well, um, not exactly 'threw away'!" stammered Fluttershy. "I actually unloaded it all in a nearby pet shelter. I thought all the hungry little bunnies there would be happy to have it. Now that I think about it, they didn't seem too keen to try it."
"Son of a mule!" cursed Applejack. "I will get mah celery crop off the ground if it kills me!"
"Not before it kills us first!" Rainbow mocked.
"Shut yer trap, Rainbow!" hissed Applejack.
"LOUD SHOUTING!" added Pinkie.
"QUACK QUACK!"
"Oh dear, what have I done?" squeaked Fluttershy.
"Hey, listen." ...Spike said, skulking in a private corner of the coach...Is he talking to me? "I know I can't hear you. But I just want you to know something, if you're paying any attention to me at all. I still don't understand what kind of relationship you have with Twilight. But I can tell that she means the world to you. And guess what...she does to me too. I feel so useless and powerless without her. She's raised me all my life, you know. So you can see that I'd do anything to get her back. Even if it means trusting some ghost thing. So if you're listening at all, I just want you to know that...I need your help. I'm willing to look past any stupid quarrels we have if it means saving Twilight. Please...stick with me. At least until I get her back."
...You got it, dragon. I'm here for you.
"All aboard! Four-thirty to Appleoosa departing!"
"Now wait there, my good man. Hold the door for me."
"You're runnin' pretty late, friend! Good thing you got yer ticket, I see."
"I'm just trying to catch up with some...old friends of mine."
"Well I don't think you sound suspicious at all. Climb aboard already!"
"Thank you, sir. I'd hate to cause a disturbance."
The next morning, the disgruntled denizens of gathered around the front face of town hall, after receiving letters for a mandatory announcement. A small stage was set up outside the front door with an intercom system set up for the curious masses to hear. Behind the stage, inside town hall, Twilight awaited with the still skeptical Mayor Mare.
"I hope you have a real crowd pleaser of a speech, Sparkle." The mayor said. "Even just seeing you in person could start a riot for all I know."
"I'll make it short, sweet and to the point, Miss Mayor." Twilight smirked. "Um, and again, sorry about raising zombies from the floors of town hall."
"Hmph, that's a start." Mayor Mare grumbled before stepping outside and onto the platform to address the waiting crowd. "Citizens of Ponyville," she spoke. "I have gathered you all here today for something...unprecedented. Somepony who is responsible for many misdeeds is here to atone once and for all. I give you...Twilight Sparkle."
"What the crap?!"
"What does she want?!"
"We don't wanna hear it!"
Twilight approached the podium, anxious but unwavering. She gazed out at the peeved audience, having never seen such derision aimed at her, and spoke into the microphone nonetheless. "My fellow ponies! I understand that I am the last one you'd rather see at any time. But that is why I have chosen to speak with you all. I hereby sincerely, and humbly, apologize to everypony in this town, for everything I have done."
"Oh yeah sure!"
"That's a load of bull!"
"Yeah, 'sorry' ain't gonna grow my eyebrows back!"
"I beseech you, good people," continued Twilight, sticking to her manner as a diplomat. "I know that no words can undo all the ways I've wronged you. That is why I am going to make good on my promise to make Ponyville a better place. Starting with restoring the carrot farm." She then procured a small potted plant that had barely begun budding. "As of last night, I have begun cultivating new, stronger carrots using botanical magic, which I offer to our local farm. I also plan to use the same methods to improve the situation of the rest of our crops, and other plants."
With a wave of magic, Twilight then sprouted an array of azaleas, rich in color and pattern, along the front of the stage from a makeshift soil bed. The townsfolk suddenly gasped in awe at the beautiful spell, hoping to see more. This was the first time Twilight had ever done anything good for this town.
"Furthermore, I plan to use every ounce of restoration magic," said Twilight with a smile. "To clean our streets and waterways, repair our homes and undo any damage caused by dark magic!"
The ponies murmured amongst each other. The exhibition of peaceful magic from their hated enemy seemed to have struck a chord with everypony. It didn't seemed so far fetched of her to fulfill her promise.
"Kind of seems like she's after my job, but whatevs." Mayor Mare muttered to herself.
"And this is only a start in my plan to cast off my wicked ways." Twilight said, soberly. "Listen, for the longest time, I thought there was no real point to friendship. But something made me realize just how easily it can be lost. So I'm going to make a new start. From this day forward, I vow to restore the kindness, honesty, generosity, loyalty, and laughter which make us all one. I only ask that you give me that chance."
Something about the way the young alicorn spoke to the ponies resonated with them deeply. This sounded like the voice of somepony who could offer true friendship and benevolence, despite the reasons they had for loathing her. If the magic in her words was enough to compel Ponyville in such a way, the possibilities of her restoring the town seemed endless. The ponies smiled and applauded calmly. Perhaps they could trust Twilight after all. Perhaps they could show her friendship as well.
"Miss Sparkle," said Mayor Mare, approaching her. "I think it's agreed that your words have inspired hope. If somepony like you can show redemption, then maybe we too can-"
Just then an explosion sounded from a few blocks away! The now vacant sugar mill suddenly went up in flames as the roof was blown off from the blast! The crowd of innocent ponies gasped and shrieked, looking towards the direction of the blast. But their horror only grew instantaneously! A hoard of angry fire salamanders stormed the town of Ponyville from the nearest hill! They crawled their slimy, slithery bodies across the ground and unleashed flumes of fire breath upon anything in sight! Before long, every building on the north side of town was ablaze! And it seemed the onslaught would continue.
The astonished crowd then looked back up at Twilight, who stared with the same reaction at the damage. But when she turned around, it quickly occurred to her then why her audience were now glaring intently at her. Twilight gulped as she lost the trust of her fellow ponies in less than a minute.
"This is her doing!" shouted Rarity. "She's only keeping us distracted!"
"Dag gummit!" cursed Applejack. "She's got that fire salamander in her house! No wonder she would have a whole mess of 'em to destroy our town!"
"I should've known she was still evil!" cried Fluttershy.
"Not the sugar plant!" yelped Pinkie Pie.
"Let's get that lying psychopath!" jeered Rainbow Dash.
Mayor Mare stomped toward Twilight. "You shouldn't have bet your house, Sparkle!"
Twilight backed down, darting her gaze across the antagonized crowd. "No wait! It's not me!" she pleaded. "I didn't plan this!"
"Twilight Sparkle planned this!" shouted one of the fire salamanders storming through town.
"Please! You have to believe me!" begged Twilight. "There's a magic voice editing everything that's going on and...Oh who am I kidding?!" With a flap of her wings, Twilight escaped the new angry mob through the air. She made haste as the resident pegasi took off to catch up with her.
"Get back here, you witch!" shouted Rainbow Dash, leading the mob.
Seeing as how taking flight would not save her, Twilight cast her teleportation spell again, this time ending up in the foyer of Contempt Castle. At that point she actually felt glad to be back in the haunting, black onyx structure. But she knew it would not be for long.
"You monster!" she scolded at the air. "I was actually going to make things better! I was going to restart a good life! Why would you just overturn everything I set out to do?!"
How many times must we go over this, Twilight? I'm the Editor! I rule this world! I can stop any attempt you make to try and live your own life! Everything is done according to my plan! In this world, I am a god!
"I swear I will find a way out of this realm you created! I will find the Narrator and I will bring you down!"
"Boy, sounds like ya really crapped the bed out there, sweetheart." Crag said, looking out the front window. "I've never seen everypony so cheesed." He then looked over to see Twilight shoving books into a saddlebag. "Ey what the heck are ya doin' now?"
"We're leaving, Crag." Twilight ordered from the kitchen as she gathered up some food to pack. "It has become abundantly clear that I don't belong in this Ponyville."
"So why do I gotta go too?!" complained Crag.
Twilight came back into the foyer and stared him down. "Because in a few minutes you won't have a home either! I don't know how or why I would ever get involved with you, let alone a hundred other fire salamanders, but it looks like you're the only one who's not out for my hide, so your company will have to do! Is that clear?!"
Crag wavered at his boss's scorn. "Crystal, ma'am."
After both had hastily gathered up supplies, Twilight seated Crag on her back and flew out of the topmost window. The salamander clung onto her back nervously, not being used to air travel. Sneaking through a series of clouds, she rose up and remained out of sight of the approaching mob down below. Immediately, the enraged Ponies began throwing rocks through the windows of the castle and setting the structure ablaze with torches. It would have been a sorrowing sight for Twilight who watched from above, if the home being destroyed was the one she was used to.
Off in the distance, half of the citizens worked to drive out the army of fire salamanders from their town, while dousing out the fires they created. This however was the sight that pained Twilight. Her high hopes for making Ponyville a better place were all for naught. In fact, her involvement would only make conditions worse. Because of her, only destruction befell the quaint hamlet.
"So where the heck are supposed to go now?!" griped Crag.
"Anywhere." Twilight said solemnly. "I don't think you can understand, Crag. But we can't fight our real problems for now. All we, or really, I can do is just keep running, until I can stop being made the cause for all this. Until I can get back to my rightful existence."
"Hey, I'm game." Crag shrugged. "I am your assistant, after all."
With one last look at her demolished home, Twilight soared away through the sky. She hoped to find some temporary safe place to hide from all the chaos she had unraveled. But deep down, she knew that no matter what hole she would scurry away into, there would be no escape from her new fate. Anything could happen to her in her travels. And everything would. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
"Princess Twilight! Oh Princess Twilight! Art thou feeling any better?! Confound these stairs. Believe you me, my young Princess, I know this dungeon is rather drastic! Yet in thy unfortunately corrupted state, we musn't take any chances with thy new impulsive attitude! Thou dost understand, yes?...Twilight? Are you awake, Prin-...Egads! She has vanished! But how?! I had a barrier against her! Guards! Alert the others post haste! We doth have a jailbreak!...Of course I mean Princess Twilight Sparkle!...Why art thou giving me such look?! I am verily serious!...Get going or I shall imprison the lot of you! Ugh! Oh sister where art thou?"