Smile Like You Mean It

by Cool_Quick


Dwight wasn't having a good time.

He had been trying for almost 20 minutes to revive Jerome, to no avail. No matter what switches he flicked, or buttons he pressed, or wires he disconnected and reconnected, Jerome wasn't getting any less dead. In fact, he almost seemed deader.

Dwight had gone from joyful, to hopeful, to nervous, to annoyed, to now just plain angry. He was so mad in fact that when another cult member came in to tell Dwight that the GCPD were coming, and also reminded him how dead Jerome was, Dwight simply lashed out and killed the guy.

But, right before he killed him, the man had said something which stuck with him. "They want to see his face."

Dwight turned to Jerome with a strange look on his face. "You know, you make an interesting point," he said to the new dead corpse. He walked to the corpse of Jerome, and pulled out a scalpel. Carefully beginning to carve into the flesh of Jerome's face, he giggled a bit. "They want to see your face, hm?"

It was a messy job, and a bit time consuming, but he finally managed to pull Jerome's face clean off. Hearing police sirens outside, he prepared for his escape.

And that's when something strange happened.

The machine that Jerome was attached to suddenly began beeping wildly. At first, Dwight thought Jerome was suddenly with a pulse, but realized quickly that wasn't the case.

Because when he turned around, a bright blue flash suddenly blinded him, causing him to drop Jerome's face. He didn't see it suddenly fly into a newly created portal along with Jerome's corpse. He just saw, well, nothing except brightness.

Then, as suddenly as it was mentioned in this paragraph, it vanished, leaving only a stunned Dwight, and an empty spot where Jerome had been.

That was where the police found Dwight when they arrived. Gordon took one look around, and knew something had been going on.

"What happened here?" he asked Dwight.

Dwight just stared at the empty operating table in shock. "I..." he appeared to be struggling with the next part. "...he... just disappeared. This bright light... Jerome's gone..." He slumped against Gordon in a dead faint.

"Get this loon to the GCPD," Harvey said to two nearby officers. As the officers carried the limp form of Dwight away, Harvey looked at Gordon. "What do you think happened?"

"Well, Jerome's corpse has got to be somewhere around here."

"What if it's not a corpse anymore?" Harvey exclaimed. "What if he did something to Dwight? He could be out there right now, biding his time like a ninja thief."

"Well, if that's the case," Gordon intoned. "The people around him aren't going to be happy."

"Easy now, Starlight," Twilight soothed as the other mare tried to get up out of bed. "You need more rest."

"I've been resting for three hours!" Starlight complained in annoyance, trying to push past Twilight.

"Twilight, she could get up for a minute," Spike said nearby, as he sat reading a comic book.

"She needs rest," Twilight insisted for the fifth time. "What are you reading anyway?"

"Oh, it's a new series!" Spike exclaimed as he showed her the cover. "It's the story of a pony whose parents were killed. Years later, she donned a suit and became known as..." he made a drum roll motion with his claws. "Batmare!"

"Silly name," Starlight put in from the floor as she tried to crawl away before Twilight noticed. So far, Twilight hadn't.

"In this story, she fight an insane master criminal known as the Joker. He was a handsome stallion who got dunked into a vat of chemicals. It not only changed his appearance to that of a clown, it also drove him completely insane!"

"Sounds delightful Spike," Twilight said. "Now why don't you...?"

She was interrupted by the sound of a thunk from downstairs, followed by a small splat.

"What in the hay was that?" Spike wondered.

"Go check it out, Spike," Twilight declared. "I'll hold the fort here."

"Whoopee," Spike cheered sarcastically as he trudged down the stairs. He made his way down the hall, and went towards the throne room, where he'd played a game with Big Mac and Discord only a couple of weeks before.

He went inside, expecting to see either Rainbow Dash lying on the table moaning, or a bookshelf fallen over.

He was not expecting to see a frightening shape lying sprawled on the table. It had fingers and toes like Spike, but it had five of each, and its limbs were longer. Where its face should have been was only a bloody area.

Spike nearly threw up, but knew he needed to be brave. "What happened to your face?" he wondered aloud. He saw something on the floor, and realized that it had to be the creature's face.

He did what any normal baby dragon would do then.

He threw up.

Twilight came into the room. "Spike, what's taking so..." she gave a screech at the "thing" lying comatose on the table. "What is it?" she squealed.

Starlight examined it. "It's dead, whatever it is."

Twilight immediately relaxed. "Good. Then we can dissect it."

Spike threw up again.

"Spike, you know I just cleaned that floor," Twilight groaned.

Spike just gagged in response.

"Wait, did you see that?" Starlight asked.


"Its eyelid. I swear it flickered a bit."

The three watched for a minute, but nothing else happened.

"Aw, it was probably your mind still reeling from being tired," Twilight said. "That's why you need rest."

Starlight grumbled.

"What do we do with it?" Spike asked.

"Just leave it for now," was the response. "I need you to get the rest of my friends while I get my autopsy kit."

"Couldn't Nurse Redheart do it?"

"She's out of town, remember?" Twilight reminded. "You just talked to her about her trip to Canterlot last week."

"Yeah, right," Spike said sullenly.

"Oh, and Spike?"

When Spike turned around, Twilight grinned sheepishly. "Take his face with you. Just as a backup."

"Fine," Spike grumbled, gingerly picking up the creature's face as if it was a poisonous adder.

He trudged out the door, mumbling about how he wished he could have a normal day just once.

"Come on Starlight," Twilight declared to the other mare. "I need to get you to bed before I get to the autopsy."

The two clopped out the door, not noticing one of the creature's fingers suddenly twitch.

An hour later, all of the Main Six were assembled in Twilight's entry hall.

And they were all talking at once.

"Are you sure it's dead?" Fluttershy was saying. "It's face is cut off? The poor thing!"

"I wanna see it," Rainbow Dash said. "I bet it looks cool."

"Ah don't know oo' in the worl' would cut off sumbody's face like that. It's just darn wrong."

"Oh, I must at least see its clothes, darling. It must look proper."

"Guys!" Twilight yelled louder than she meant. Everyone fell silent.

It was quiet for about three seconds.

And then a party blast was heard behind them.

"Wheee!" Pinkie Pie squealed as she flipped in front of Twilight. "I can't WAIT to hold the First Annual "Dead Human Found in Twilight's Castle" party. It's going to be a BLAST!" She sent forth a blast of confetti from the Pinkie Dimension, which is a mysterious place that only Pinkie knows about, and can use.

It was then that she noticed the stares. "Oh, sorry, did I interrupt something?"

"We were just discussing what we should do about the corpse. Other than inspecting it of course." The way Twilight said "inspecting" made Spike feel a little nervous.

"I still don't see how cutting a knife into a dead body is 'beneficial to science,'" Rainbow Dash exclaimed as she made hoof quotes.

Exactly, Spike mouthed at her.

"Because..." Twilight fumed as she searched for a good reason. "It just is!"

"Okay..." Rainbow remarked, trying not to break into snickers.

"We need to at least look at it first," Rarity said. "Before it gets all ruined."

"Good idea," Twilight praised. "Fluttershy, why don't you look first? The rest of us will search for my autopsy kit."

"She lost it," Spike added. "Again."

Twilight hit him with her version of the Stare, which Spike found kind of funny.

"Oh, well, um..." Fluttershy looked at Twilight's eager face, before confidently saying "Okay"

"Excellent!" Twilight beamed. "Have fun!" With that, everyone except Fluttershy went off down the hall, Twilight and Spike going on about whether Twilight lost her kit or not.

Fluttershy turned and headed towards the room where the corpse lay, a little nervous about what she might find. When she reached the door, she tentatively pushed it open with her hoof, and went inside.

And she gave a squeak.

Where there had been a corpse, was now just a bloody spot on the table.

Fluttershy stepped inside a little further and yelled "Hello?"

No answer.


The door suddenly slammed shut behind her, and a pair of arms wrapped around her mouth, blocking her scream. With wide eyes, she saw a knife put in front of her vision, dangerously close to her neck.

From behind, she heard a raspy, demonic kind of voice say "Boo." The word was followed by hysterical giggles that sent chills up her spine.

She managed to free her mouth long enough to gasp "Who are you?"

The figure chuckled again. "I'm someone who will bring a smile to everyone's face." Then he gave a fake gasp. "Oh, you mean my name."

Fluttershy was turned around to face the figure, and she gave a scream that was muffled by his grasp. His face, or where his face should have been, was just a mass of blood, with only a smiling mouth, and two insane eyes looking at her.

"Well, the name's Jerome Valeska. We're going to have so much fun together."