Luna's stars rested across the deep purple night. The few clouds in the air were swirled and wispy, not quite blocking the lights glittering behind them. The brightest light source was the moon, which cast down a square patch of light that illuminated a brown hat sitting on the boards of the upper hay-loft of Applejack's barn. The hat's owner was not looking out at the beautiful nighttime sky. She wasn't looking anywhere.
Applejack's back was leaning against the wall beside the window. Her hat was to her left and to her right was an almost empty bottle. In her hoof was a note she had written. She had tried to pour out her pain and fill the vacancy with cider. Whether or not the tactic had worked depended on how one defined "worked." To Applejack, it did.
More or less.
She still didn't have clarity about her feelings, and she knew that clouding her mind didn't help, but it at least didn't make things any worse than they already were. And the emotional lubrication it offered had helped the words to flow out onto the paper she had brought out there. Why was it so hard to get her heart to talk when it felt like it was shouting at her from her chest?
Without warning, a sky colored pegasus with a rainbow mane streaked in through the window, sliding and stopping just before she reached the edge of the loft. Looking all around, she spotted Applejack and galloped toward her. "AJ, are you okay?!" she shouted.
"Good gravy, Dash!" Now breathing somewhat heavily from the shock of her friend's sudden appearance, Applejack put a hoof to her chest, feeling her heart rate rise. "What in tarnation gives y'all the right ta come chargin' in here like that?"
"Big Mac came to my house and said I needed to come talk to you. He..." Rainbow bit her lip. "He said you came out here with a quill and paper and a bottle of cider."
Looking at the items beside her, Applejack's eyes went wide and she looked back at Rainbow. "Wha-- y'all thought? No! Ah'd never do that! Ah swear! Ah just... Ah just needed some time alone..."
Raising an eyebrow, Dash asked, "So what's with the paper?"
"Well, it's a letter. But it's just a letter letter. Nothin' like what y'all were thinkin'."
Rainbow Dash let the air out of her lungs and walked the rest of the way over to Applejack. She then sat down next to her, gently pushing the farmpony's hat to the side to avoid sitting on it. "Who's it for?"
Picking up the sheet, Applejack looked it over again. "Ah guess it's addressed to the stars."
Glancing at the paper, Rainbow saw "Dear Ma and Pa" written at the top. Upon seeing that, she immediately looked away. "Is it about what happened this morning?"
Applejack nodded. "The first time Ah thought about ya like that, Ah wrote a letter. It made it easier ta think about. And after a while, Ah think it was helpin' me let go. So after today, Ah felt like Ah needed another one ta make sense of it all.
"A part of me wishes it hadn't gone wrong, but Ah know this was how it was suppose ta be. Ah think y'all were always meant ta be my favorite regret. And Ah knew if Ah ever talked to ya, Ah'd ruin everythin'." Grabbing her bottle with her free hoof, Applejack lifted it up and drained the remainder of the contents down her throat.
"I don't think you ruined everything. Talking about this stuff is hard for anypony. You don't need to beat yourself up about it."
"Yer a few hours too late for that." Applejack set down the empty bottle. "Ah already feel just awful."
"And I'd say anything if I thought it would make you feel better."
At this, Applejack looked into Dash's eyes. "Ya mean it?" she asked.
"Absolutely."
"Ya promise?"
A light smile on her face, Rainbow placed a hoof over an eye.
Taking a deep breath and nodding, Applejack said, "Tell me you'll never forgive me."
Dash dropped her hoof and blinked.
"Go on!" Applejack let out something between a cough and a sob. "Ya swore ya'd say it!"
"AJ..." Rainbow Dash leaned in and gave Applejack a hug, which caused her to break down.
Leaning into Rainbow Dash, Applejack pushed her face into her rainbow mane. "Ya gotta t-tell me yer angry. Ya can't-- Don't hug me like yer doin' right now!"
Caressing the other mare's back, Rainbow rested her head against Applejack's. "But I love hugging you."
"H-h-hugs are earned. And love is earned!" Applejack's arms hugged Rainbow Dash, and her shoulders began to shake. "So don't say ya love me neither!"
For a time, the two embraced. Rainbow Dash could feel Applejack shivering as tears spilled from her eyes. The sharp smell of cider filled Dash's nostrils. She noted the greasy feel of sweat on Applejack's back. Rainbow Dash pressed into the hug further.
"Why won't ya say how mad you are?"
"Applejack, I said I'd say anything to make you feel better," said Dash. "I just don't think that's gonna make you feel better."
"That's not how this works," said Applejack. "Ah messed up bad. Ah saw yer face. Ah know it hurt."
Rainbow bit her lip. "I... I guess it did."
"Ah knew it!" Applejack wailed. "And there ain't enough hours from now to eternity for me ta make it right."
"You don't have to do anything. I know you didn't mean it to hurt like that."
"But Ah did! Ah wanted ta hurt you so bad. Ah wanted ta say the worst thing Ah could imagine. And Ah actually said it!" Applejack pressed her forehead into Rainbow's neck as she shook her head.
Dash sighed. "Well, I forgive you."
Her voiced muffled as she spoke into Rainbow's chest, Applejack asked, "How can ya just forgive me?"
Rainbow Dash rubbed her hoof against AJ's back and said, "Because of that thing you said I can't say."