“You really didn’t have to escort me to the station.”
Yearling glanced around to make sure nopony in this backwater of a town was watching before offering a warm smile. She had a reputation as a grouchy recluse, and she liked it that way. “It’s no problem. I feel kinda responsible for you being out here to begin with.”
Rather than be pleased by this, Fluttershy gained a sad frown. “You even smile like her.”
“I’m trying to be nice here.”
“I know. I’m sorry.” Fluttershy shook her head as if to clear it, then offered a wan smile of her own. “This trip didn’t go at all like I hoped, but… I’m glad I took it.”
Studying the train quietly awaiting passengers that amounted to one was easier than looking into those blue eyes. “I don’t know why. I didn’t really do anything.”
The gentlest hoof imaginable touched her shoulder as Fluttershy replied, “You tried, and you kept me from making a mistake. That’s not nothing. And besides… Now I finally have proof.”
When Yearling looked again, she was startled to see her brief guest standing taller than ever before. She looked almost confident. Almost. It was such a big improvement that Yearling wondered if she shouldn’t be proud or something. “Proof of what?”
The pretty blue eyes were on her again. Sad, but full of something different from the usual longing and loss. Acceptance, perhaps. “That she’s really gone, and isn’t coming back.”
“Oh.” Shuffling under her shawl, Yearling tried to think of something to say that didn’t sound insensitive. “I guess I’m sorry, then?”
“It’s alright. I had to figure it out eventually, right?” The train’s whistle blew, as loud and obnoxious as ever. Yearling didn’t like trains much. “I have to go. Umm, thanks for putting up with me.”
The timid, self-deprecating statement irked Yearling, but she held back on lecturing the pony. That’s what her friends back home were for. So instead she smirked and replied with, “Thanks for not drinking all my booze last night.”
Fluttershy actually laughed, much to her relief. “I’ll ask Applejack to send you a few bottles of cider to make up for it.” She paused, half-turned to Yearling. She looked down, then up again, then down again. Finally, she moved in for a hug. Yearling considered it a sign of personal progress that it only took her a second to reciprocate, as opposed to pushing the filly away.
The whistle sounded again, and Fluttershy broke off the embrace with what may have been the most genuine smile of her entire visit. “I hope we talk again soon. Under less… embarrassing circumstances.” And, like a butterfly, she flitted off into the train. Instinct told Yearling to just leave, but she made herself stand there and wait, just so that she could wave when Fluttershy inevitably looked at her though the window.
Then the train moved on, and she was alone.
Well, not quite. “You can come out now.” She waited until she heard the hooves touch ground behind her before turning around.
Rainbow Dash rubbed at her foreleg, looking not unlike a filly who’d got her hoof caught in a cookie jar. “H-hey, A.K. What’s up?”
Ah, she had enough sense to not go spouting off Yearling’s other name in public. For that, she was greatly appreciative. She examined the pony from head to hoof, making sure her expression was set to maximum scrutiny just to eat at Rainbow a little. “You followed her here, didn’t you?”
With a sigh, Rainbow nodded. “She thinks I don’t pay attention when she talks about lame stuff like butterfly conventions, but I knew the timing was way off for that. Plus I got a look at her train ticket – entirely on accident!” She hopped into the air to hover and waved her hooves wildly. “It’s not like I go through my best friend’s stuff or anything. I mean, it was just lying there on the table! What was I supposed to do, not look?” Rainbow paused her frantic gesticulating to look at Yearling’s skeptical face. “I’m not helping myself any, am I?”
“Not really.” Deciding she’d had enough fun, Yearling allowed herself a smug smile. “But I’m not the expert on friendship here, so who am I to judge?”
“Right! So.” Rainbow looked around as though she expected somepony to be listening in, but the area around the platform was deserted. She landed once more and sat. Her eyes decided to look at anything but Yearling. “So, uh… Fluttershy.”
“Yeah?”
“She, uh…” Rainbow pursed her lips as her wings flicked and flapped in agitation. “She stayed the night with you, huh?”
Ooh, she looked pretty frightened by that idea! Yearling had read enough crummy romances – for study in writing technique, of course – to pick up on a few ideas of what she was seeing. Maybe she could use this as fodder later. Daring Do didn’t ever get much romance in her life, which was fine, but sometimes she did have an occasional sidekick now, and she was wide open for toying with. Her publishers sometimes mentioned the need to expand the market, after all.
Realizing what was going through her mind, she shook her head violently. That was not the kind of thing she needed to think about right now! She was supposed to be Rainbow’s friend. That meant… uh… what should a friend say in this situation? Trying to sound nonchalant, she at last answered. “Yeah, I let her take the bed. It seemed wrong to let a dainty flower like that sleep on my cheap furniture. Which reminds me; I really need to find something cheap that doesn’t feel like I’m lying on a rock.”
Rainbow’s ears perked as she finally met Yearling’s eyes. “So, you two didn’t, like, do anything?”
Yearling replied with a deadpan, “Not unless you count going through almost half my alcohol as ‘doing anything’.”
A second later, Rainbow was giggling like a madmare. “Y-you got her to drink? Oh, wow, I wish I’d been there to see that. I’ve been trying for years!”
“Eh, you wouldn’t have liked what you saw.” Yearling waved a dismissive hoof. “She’s not a happy drunk.”
The laughing came to a cold stop. “Oh. Well, that’s a bummer.” Rainbow frowned, glanced away. “So… that’s it? Just a few bottles of booze?”
“Are you accusing me of something?”
“No!” And Rainbow was in the air again. She was just as skittish as Fluttershy right now, in her own way. “I wouldn’t accuse you of nothing! And even if I did, I’d…” She didn’t land, but she did sag, her body bending around her wings like a sack of flour held up by rope. “I don’t ever want to fight you again.”
That one gave Yearling pause. “You fought me? Since when?”
“Not ‘you’ you. The other you.” Rainbow gestured at Yearling halfheartedly. “I’m sure you heard about it. That clone from Daring Do and the Eyes of Nekhbet.”
Ah, that one. This was a curious development. Why hadn’t Fluttershy mentioned it? And more importantly… Yearling eyed Rainbow. She was tiny, but had good musculature. She had the look of somepony who could handle herself in a brawl, her screwup with Ahuizotl notwithstanding. “Who won?”
Rainbow grimaced and shook her head. “I don’t think anypony won that one, A.K.”
Right, mind on the wrong track again. This friendship stuff was hard. And that alone was enough to remind her that she needed to be patient with this. Fluttershy had needed help, and Yearling figured she’d done poorly at that. As much as she’d like to go buy a drum of ink and get back to writing about things less personal for all involved, she didn’t think it would be the ‘friendly’ thing to leave Rainbow as she was. I swear, by the time this day is over I’ll be offering free hugs and resorting to writing children’s books. She shivered at the very thought.
But she was resigned to her course, and so she gestured to Rainbow before turning away. “Come on, we can talk while we walk.” At least this way she could get her drum and do the whole ‘friend’ thing at the same time. Progress!
Rainbow landed next to her without argument. They walked for a time without saying anything. Yearling figured Rainbow would say what was really on her mind soon enough. That or give up and fly off once the shopping was done, which… would make Yearling feel pretty crummy, come to think of it,
Maybe she should push this along? “So, does Fluttershy know you fought Daring?”
“No,” Rainbow muttered. “And I’m scared to let her know.”
“Oh, yeah? What for?”
Rainbow’s head whipped up. “Because it’s my fault! I was a total selfish jerk and attacked, and if I hadn’t then she’d probably still be getting the love in Fluttershy’s cottage!” Her next words came out as a growl. “If I had just controlled myself for once…”
Hmm. Yearling couldn’t be sure, but she thought she detected a hint of what was really going on. “And why exactly were you fighting?”
“Don’t wanna talk about it.”
Yep, jealousy. Years of practice let Yearling maintain a neutral façade, but deep down she was a little worried. If Rainbow had attacked first because Daring was getting it on with her mare… Ick, wrong word choice. Made it sound like Fluttershy was a herder. Still, Yearling had little interest in getting into a fight with Rainbow over some wild misconception. That was how these things always went, right?
Best stop that in its tracks right now. “Fluttershy just needed some reassurance.”
Rainbow, who had been making a show of looking away, turned back to her, eyebrows shot up in a frightened expression. “Reassurance of what?”
“That Daring and me are not the same. That she can’t relive those glory days with a pony that happens to look and sound just like Daring. That Daring is gone.” Yearling leveled a firm look at Rainbow. “And there are no substitutes.”
They stared at one another, paused in the near empty dirt road in the middle of town, for a few long seconds. It was Rainbow who looked away, the sadness ever-present in her eyes. “Because of me. Yeah…”
Yearling reached out to touch her shoulder. “I really think you need to talk to her about it.”
“How can I?” Rainbow began pacing, her steps gradually becoming stomps as her voice got louder. “I’m supposed to be her best friend. But I hurt her, A.K. I hurt her bad. And all because of some stupid feelings that I never had the guts to act on because I’m such a stupid lame-oh! If I’d just let Daring do her thing and not been a selfish jerk of a pony then Fluttershy would still be happy but she’s not because I screwed up and I am just so peeved with myself right now!”
Well, this was going places fast. Yearling sat down and adjusted her glasses, waiting to see if her companion had anything more to add. It seemed that wasn’t going to happen, though; Rainbow just kept pacing and snorting and flicking her tail. Maybe now was a good time to step in?
“Is Fluttershy happy now?”
“What?” Rainbow whirled on her with a snarl. “You just spent a whole night with her, what do you think? She’s been miserable for months and I don’t know what to do about it!”
“Well, I did suggest she talk to your friend Apple… uh…. The one that makes the awesome cider.”
“Applejack.” Rainbow’s brow furrowed, confusion joining her frustration. “Why her?”
“Because Fluttershy implied she’d lost somepony important to her,” Yearling explained patiently. “So she might be able to help her cope with the loss a little better.”
Rainbow sniffed and turned her face away, scowl firmly locked into place. “I guess, maybe. Better than anything I could do.”
“Because you’ve been trying for six months and nothing worked?”
A wince. “Actually, I’ve kinda been avoiding her.”
Yearling gaped. This was supposed to be one of the paragons of friendship? “Why the hay would you do that? That’s gotta be the single worst thing you could do, even I know that.”
Running a hoof through her mane, Rainbow turned to stare down the street. A few ponies were out and about, but it seemed today would be a slow one for the locals. A cold wind blew their manes and tails about, making Rainbow shiver and reminding everypony that the rain probably wasn’t quite done with them yet. Which made Yearling wonder how it was Rainbow was perfectly dry, considering the downpour had still been going on that morning. Seeing that her companion wasn’t going to start talking soon, Yearling continued trotting down the road. After a few dozen steps, she heard Rainbow follow.
Just as they were approaching the town’s only general store, Rainbow spoke up. “Do you think Fluttershy would still want to be my friend if I told her?”
That, at least, was easy to answer. “Given how she talked about you last night, I’d say she doesn’t hold any hard feelings from you not being around these last six months. So yeah, I’d take that bet.”
“She talked about me?” Excitement laced the query, but it faded back to anxiety after Yearling’s nod. “W-what did she say?”
“I don’t remember the details,” Yearling replied while stepping onto the store’s porch. “But generally speaking, that you two have been and will be best friends forever.” Maybe Fluttershy hadn’t said that exactly, but she wanted to be encouraging.
Slowly, as if worried the floorboards might explode, Rainbow stepped up next to her. She kept her eyes on her hooves and said nothing for a time. Yearling ignored the Daring Do inside her that wanted to get this conversation over with. Friends don’t rush friends, and darn it, Yearling wanted to be a good friend! It wasn’t half as easy as Twilight’s widespread pamphlets made it sound.
At last, Rainbow found her words again. “I know it looks bad, but what I did is even worse, and what I feel makes that seem like a raindrop in an ocean.”
Yearling raised an eyebrow. “How do you feel then? Other than miserable, because that part’s obvious.”
“Anypony ever mention you need to work on your social graces?”
Despite the melancholic tone, Yearling had to smile a little. “I’m still trying to figure out this whole ‘supportive friend’ thing. My best example so far has been ‘You can flap too, y’know?’” And, somehow, that pulled the corner of Rainbow’s lip up. Just a little, but Yearling would take what progress she could.
“Point taken.” Rainbow sat up straight, eyes closed, and sucked in a sharp breath. “I’m sad that Fluttershy’s sad, but the thing with Daring? I’m… kinda… relieved?” She flinched and grew smaller with every word, though her head stayed up. One of her tightly squeezed eyes peeled open to catch Yearling’s gaze.
Only when that happened did Yearling respond. “It could be worse.”
“How could it be worse?” Rainbow threw up her hooves with a frustrated cry, catching the attention of the elderly couple that just stepped out of the store. “Don’t you get what I just said? I’m relieved that Daring kicked the bucket! Isn’t that the most horrible thing you’ve ever heard? Don’t answer, it’s the most horrible thing you’ve ever heard. So yeah, I’m avoiding Fluttershy like the plague, because her marefriend died and that’s my fault and I don’t even have the good character to feel bad that she’s gone!”
“Sounds like you feel plenty bad.”
“I don’t feel bad enough!” Rainbow wacked herself on the head a few times. “I’m so stupid, stupid, stupid.”
“Alright, just stop.” Yearling caught Rainbow’s arm before it could be used for more self-flagellation. Rainbow didn’t fight back, but didn’t look at her, either. “You need to go talk to Fluttershy ASAP.”
“I can’t.” Rainbow shook her head forcefully. “I don’t deserve a friend like her.”
Not to be ignored, Yearling forced Rainbow to face her. “That’s not your decision. She’s the one who decides that, not you.”
“But I—”
Yearling popped her over the head with a hoof, albeit lightly. “Shut up, I’m trying to make a point here.” She gave Rainbow a second, just to make sure she wouldn’t start yammering again. “Look, the situation was crap for everypony involved. You’re a brash, loud pegasus. You tend to act without thinking. I should know, I distinctly remember you getting pawned by Ahuizotl.”
“Gee, thanks.”
Yearling sighed and let go, now at least sure she had the pony’s attention. “That wasn’t a criticism, Rainbow, it was a point of fact: you act without thinking. Fluttershy knows this. She has to, you’ve known one another all your lives. And I’m willing to bet this isn’t the first time you’ve made a bad decision and tried to hide from the results.”
“I don’t—” Rainbow clamped her jaw closed at Yearling’s narrow-eyed glare. Scuffing the floor with a hoof, she bowed her head. “M-maybe. I guess.”
“Which tells me, in turn, that Fluttershy has had to forgive you in the past. A lot. And she always has.”
Rainbow shivered and turned her face away. “I don’t know if she’d forgive me for this.”
“And how many times have you said that to yourself already?”
A blink. Rainbow sat up straight and cocked her head, eyes squinting as she considered. She hummed and ummed for a while. “I don’t actually know. A lot, now that you mention it.” Noting Yearling’s pointed, deadpan stare, she flinched. “But this one’s diff—” Her hoof shot up to prevent the words from coming out of Yearling’s already opened mouth. “Yeah, I’ve said that one a lot, too.”
Aaand there was still mud on that hoof. Yearling batted it away and glowered, sure that her messy muzzle was obvious by Rainbow’s sheepish expression.
“Sorry. Lemme just, ah…” Blue pinions brushed away the muck from Yearling’s lips. “There. Not so bad. I’m sure you roll around in mud all the time, right?”
After rubbing her lips with a fetlock to finish the job, Yearling growled, “A certain somepony we both know will happily dive into mud if it means surviving and getting the treasure, but A.K. Yearing is the scholarly, clean type, thank you very much.”
Rainbow cocked her head to one side. “How does that even work? Are there, like, two ponies in that head of yours or something?”
“I think we’re getting off topic,” Yearling groused. “You made a terrible decision and, deep down, you feel a little relieved about it.”
Flinching, her companion went right back to pouting and bowing her head. “Yeah, that about sums it up.”
“That’s perfectly normal.”
The head popped back up as if it were on some kind of lever, and this time Rainbow’s ears followed suit as she asked an incredulous, “Normal?”
“Yeah, normal.” Yearling poked her in the chest hard enough to make her wince. “Everypony has a little bit of selfishness inside them, and I mean everypony. Our daily lives are made up of selfish acts. Like me, right now, wanting to get this stupid discussion over so I can buy a drum of ink and get back to writing the awesome action scene I was on yesterday.”
Cringing, Rainbow opened her wings. “Y-you could have just said we were disturbing you, A.K. I’ll just—”
“Fold those wings right now, sister!” Only now did Yearling realize that her patience had hit its limit. She watched, teeth bared and wings half-erect, as Rainbow stared wide-eyed at her outburst. Slowly, as if wary of sudden movements, she did as she was told.
Yearling took a long, calming breath, but didn’t lose eye contact with her cowed companion. “The point is, there’s almost always some selfish little something a voice in the back of our heads is insisting we satisfy. Fluttershy wanted to get Daring back, and was willing to risk turning my life upside down to do it. I want to get back to my writing vacation, and to Tartarus with annoying ponies with moral crises that come looking for a shoulder to cry on.” Daring decided to stick with Fluttershy until the inevitable happened, but Yearling decided not to mention that one. “You? You wanted Daring out of the way so that you could have Fluttershy all to yourself.”
Ignoring Rainbow’s pained expression, Yearling stepped closer and lowered her voice, trying to make it sound gentler than she was used to. “The difference is that you got what you wanted, and because you’re a good pony, you can’t stand it. The consequences are too great. Even if it’s not your fault, you’re trying to take credit for it.”
“But it is—”
“Not finished.” Another glare to shut the dumb pony up before she could dig her hole any deeper. “Not only does everypony have that little selfish desire, but everypony has those times where they act on them and have to face the consequences. I bet you’re more used to that than others.” Rainbow tensed, but said nothing. “The fact that you slipped up doesn’t make you a bad pony, Rainbow.”
“But I—”
Daring poked her forehead with the tip of her hoof hard enough to make her wince. “And let me tell you something, the fact that you are so friggen hung up on this is all the proof I need to know I’m right! I swear to Celestia, you and Fluttershy are like two peas in the same stupid pod. You should have heard the way she panicked at the very idea she might become an alcoholic.”
Her quip had the desired effect, putting a silly smile on Rainbow’s face. “I still wish I could have watched that.”
“It was certainly something to see.” Yearling stepped back and looked Rainbow from head to hoof. She figured – she hoped – she’d said enough. “I don’t intend to keep arguing with you about this, and I’m not gonna hold your hoof while you try to sort your brain out. You’re both adults, and you can approach this problem with maturity.” Assuming Rainbow had that, but Yearling would give her the benefit of the doubt.
In a more subdued tone, she added, “Fluttershy’s hurting, Rainbow. She needs you now more than ever. If you really want to make up for that selfish move, you’ll do the unselfish thing and be there for her.”
Rainbow frowned, opened her mouth, closed it again. Her eyebrows rose and fell a few times as she demonstrated a range of emotions, all laced with confusion. “But… spending time with her is kinda what I want, so isn’t that selfish of me too?”
“Nope, not having this argument.” Yearling pushed Rainbow off the porch, not bothering to be gentle. “Go do what Fluttershy needs you to do, and don’t think about anything else!”
“But—”
“Nothing else.”
“Shouldn’t I—”
“Nothing.”
“A.K.—”
Yearling thrust her hoof at the air and glared.
Rainbow stared back, appearing more confused than hurt. After a few seconds she snickered and, with a flick of her mane, launched into a hover. “Alright, alright, I get it. You really need to work on your social graces, y’know that?”
Smirking, Yearling sat down and folded her hooves to her chest before stating in as close to an imitation as she could, “I am suuuuuch a huge fan.”
Heat bloomed across Rainbow’s cheeks as she chuckled. “I was a little excited, okay?”
“Yeah, sure.” Resuming her normal stance, Yearling offered that warm smile she so rarely used. After checking nopony would notice, that is. “I don’t know my way around these ‘friendship talks,’ but I think you’ll be fine, Rainbow. And Fluttershy, too. But only if you…” how to put it nicely? Ah, screw it. “Grow up and talk to her.”
Rainbow pouted, but gave a tentative nod. “I’ll try. I mean, if I ignore her our friendship’s over, so talking to her can’t result in anything worse than that, right?”
“Your friendship isn’t going to end.” Yearling waved her off with a smirk. “Now shoo! Unless you want to be the reason the next Daring Do book misses its publication date.”
“Yikes! Gotta go!” Rainbow was off in a multihued blur.
Only to reappear right when Yearling had turned away. “And, uh, thanks, A.K. You’ve gotten a lot cooler since you decided to give friendship a chance.” Poof, gone again.
Yearling watched her until she wasn’t even a dot on the horizon anymore. She wondered idly about the warm feeling in her chest. Such simple words shouldn’t cause an increase in body heat. But… she decided she rather liked it. Maybe she could get used to having random ponies – no, friends – dropping in on her every now and again.
The thought sent a chill down her spine. She promptly looked about the street, half-expecting somepony to show up and ask her to solve another moral problem she wasn’t at all qualified to help with. A minute passed, punctuated by a rumble of thunder and a cool wind. Nothing happened.
Knowing better than to chance it, she turned about and went straight inside. She’d get her drum of ink, go home, lock every door and window, close every curtain, and maybe hide in the basement while she was at it.
Two ponies in as many days was her limit.