//------------------------------// // In With The New // Story: The New Life of a Winning Pony // by Chengar Qordath //------------------------------// After taking a couple days to think it over, I’d more or less reached a decision. The only thing left to take care of was actually telling everyone and making sure none of them pointed out a really obvious reason to change my mind. Getting Derpy, Rainbow, Eepy, and Blossom together was easy enough. However, once I had four beautiful mares sitting in my living room, I couldn’t resist being ... well, myself. “So, you’re all probably wondering why I gathered you all together. I’d like to announce the beginning of our new weekly friendship orgy.” Before I could get any further, Rainbow smacked me in the face with a pillow. “I deserved that.” “Darn right you did,” Rainbow grumbled good-naturedly. “You’d think being preggers would make you more responsible and less ... you.” Blossom rolled her eyes. “I don’t think we’d know what to do with Cloud if she stopped acting like a lovable sex-crazed madmare.” “That’s true,” Fluttershy murmured. “But she’s just joking. She’s not really trying to...” “Of course she’s kidding,” Derpy agreed with a grin. “Though I doubt she’d complain too much if we went along with that. Really, I should’ve known she was up to something when she offered me muffins earlier. Guess I should have been more specific.” I pulled out the basket of baked goods I’d promised her, carefully extracting one muffin for each of the other four ponies before setting it down in front of her. She immediately tore into them like a shark who’d spotted its next meal. “Everyone make sure to keep your hooves clear,” I warned. “We don’t want any more incidents.” Derpy stopped eating just long enough to grumble. “I only did that one time...” and then got back to her meal. I cleared my throat, doing my best to ignore the shower of crumbs coming from Derpy’s eating area. “Anyway, the real reason you’re all here is because I’ve got some big news I wanted to share with everyone.” Rainbow smirked looking down at my swollen belly. “Lemme guess, you’re pregnant?” “Ha ha, Rainbow.” I scoffed and rolled my eyes. “Also, ha.” I used a wing to brush some of Derpy’s leavings off my shoulder. “Anyway, let’s get down to business. Twilight offered me a new job.” Rainbow blinked and frowned at me, cocking her head to the side. “Huh wha? Why would she do that? I mean, you already have a job. Having two jobs at once while you’re preggo seems like a bad idea.” “What kind of job?” Derpy asked. “What does she want you to do? She’s royalty, so I bet she’s offering pretty good pay and benefits.” “I already pay Cloud plenty,” Rainbow groused under her breath. “It’s not like she’s gotta get a second job just to pay the bills.” I coughed to get everyone’s attention. “Well, as far as the job she’s offering me goes, after some recent events...” Everyone glanced Fluttershy’s way, then hastily made a point of looking somewhere else. “Twilight thought it might be a good idea to have somepony who could smooth out any issues between her new guards and the locals.” Rainbow let out a breath. “Oh, well ... that’s just a temporary thing. I mean, since you’re pregnant and you can’t really do any weather work now, and we don’t do enough paperwork to keep you busy on desk duty all day every day. So yeah, that’s cool. Makes sense. By the time the kid’s out and you’re recovered you oughta be done helping out Twilight, and things can go back to normal.” Oh dammit, I’d been worried Rainbow would have a hard time with this. “I don’t think it’s just a temporary thing, Rainbow.” Fluttershy frowned down at the floor. “Um, I don’t want to tell you what to do, but I don’t think you can hold down two different jobs and raise a new baby at the same time.” Well, so much for just leaving that part unsaid. “Um ... yeah.” I couldn’t meet Rainbow’s eyes as I confessed. “I’d need to resign from the weather team.” Rainbow’s jaw hit the floor, and Fluttershy answered with a very soft “Oh.” She hesitated, then shot a hesitant look Blossom’s way. “Um, well, I guess we should look on the bright side? That would certainly make it easier on you.” Blossom’s eyes fell to the carpets as she scuffed her hooves along them. “Well, yeah. I mean, I can't exactly be an objective boss when Cloud’s pregnant with our child. I’m pretty sure that if we both stayed in the weather service one of us would have to transfer.” Derpy nodded. “That’s true, it’s against the rules to sleep with employees.” She frowned in deep thought, her wall eye slowly drifting back to look at what was left of the muffins as she scratched her chin. “And it is a pretty good job for Cloud. She has plenty of Guard background and also knows Ponyville well enough to get on with everyone here.” “Yeah, but...” Rainbow cut herself off, staring down at the floor as her shoulders and wings drooped. “But Cloud and me’ve been working the weather for years. She’s my right-wing mare! I mean, yeah, I’m gonna leave to join the Wonderbolts before too much longer, but...” She shrugged listlessly. “I dunno. I kinda thought I’d be leaving things in your hooves.” She blinked and looked back up at me. “Is this because I promoted Blossom over you? I’m sorry. I didn’t have a choice. You’re pregnant and about to go on leave for months and—” I held up a hoof to cut her off. “It’s not just that, Dash.” “Not just that.” Rainbow repeated. “So it is a factor, isn’t it?” I took a deep breath and reluctantly nodded. “I’d be lying if I said it didn’t make Twilight’s offer more tempting.” Rainbow slumped even lower on the sofa, looking like she wanted nothing more than to sink into the cushions and disappear. “I wasn’t ... I was just trying to...” “You did what was right for the weather team,” I assured her. “Having a new boss is always going to be a tricky transition. The last thing we needed was for me to take over, then get replaced for months by Blossom when I went on maternity leave, then take back over just when they were getting used to Blossom being in charge.” “Not to mention that if you’d put Cloud in charge, I’d be in the same boat she’s in,” Blossom added. “It’s not like having her as my boss would make for any less of a conflict of interest than the other way around.” Derpy sighed maternally and wrapped a wing around Rainbow. “It was bound to happen sooner or later. They’re both really good at their jobs, and they both work on the same team. You couldn’t just refuse to promote either one of them to avoid relationship complications.” “Yeah but...” Rainbow bit her lip, staring down at the floor. “It was a lot easier when that wasn’t staring me in the face, and Cloud wasn’t quitting ‘cause I promoted Blossom. Now it feels like I’m the one who broke up the old gang. Soon as I get into the Wonderbolts, everypony just goes their own way.” “Hey.” I grabbed Rainbow and gave her a gentle scalp massage. “Just because we have different jobs doesn’t mean we’re not still friends. Derpy and Fluttershy don’t do weather work most of the time, and you’re still pals with them.” “It’s not like Cloud won’t be coming home every night,” Blossom added. “The only difference is now we’ll have different stories about what happened to us at work.” Fluttershy nodded her agreement. “Nothing’s breaking up, Rainbow. It’s not like we have the same jobs as Twilight, Pinkie, or Rarity, and we’re all still friends.” “That’s true.” Rainbow nodded, a smile slowly returning to her lips. “I mean, yeah, it’ll stink to not be able to bug Cloud at work, but I guess that’s a small price to pay to get to hang out with the Wonderbolts.” Derpy smiled and nodded. “Everything’s going to be fine. Really, you’ll be the only one who’ll be out of Ponyville most of the time.” Rainbow’s tentative smile vanished in an instant, her worried frown returning twice as deep. I swooped in to do some quick damage control in my own unique way. “There’s still time to join my harem if you think you’ll miss me that much, Dash.” Rainbow grumbled several less than friendly things under her breath and scooted away from me. “Shuddup, Cloud. I’m gonna have to buy a spray bottle to keep you off...” I chuckled and gave her a quick pat on the head. “Love you too, Dash.” Rainbow grunted and scowled. Apparently my joke hadn’t been enough to get her out of her funk. “This is how friends start to drift apart, isn’t it? We have different jobs in different places, get caught up in new routines .... soon we’ll be hanging with different ponies at work and when we get together we won’t have anything in common to talk about. I’ll have my Wonderbolt stuff, Cloud will have her guard liaison-ing and Blossom’ll have the weather...” I sighed patiently. “I’ll never stop being your friend, Rainbow.” “Maybe we’d never stop being friends,” Rainbow conceded. “But soon you’ll have somepony in the Guard you’ll be around all day, having your own fun and jokes and stories that I won’t be a part of. We’ll all just become a smaller part of each other’s lives, until I go from being your awesome best friend to that old childhood friend you haven’t seen for months and keep meaning to hang out with, but never find the time for.” I gently rubbed her shoulder. “Dash, sweetie, nobody’s ever gonna replace you.” “Why not?” she snapped petulantly. “I’ve got other best buds, and now Blossom’s apparently my right-wing mare at work instead of you. Sure looks like I’ve replaced you, and now you’re getting a new job.” I flinched, and Derpy did her best to help to calm Rainbow down. “That’s different, Rainbow. No job’s going to have the same ponies around forever.” “Yeah.” I shuffled on the couch, not quite willing to meet her eyes. “Weather work ... I liked it well enough, but I honestly only ever did it because it was a job you could help me get real quick and easy right after I moved to Ponyville. We were friends before we worked together, and I don’t see any reason we wouldn’t stay friends after.” “No one ever plans to leave a friend,” Rainbow grumbled. “They just do it without even realizing it. It’s like what happened with me and Gilda. Back in the Junior Speedsters we were super tight, but when I met up with later it was like I didn’t even know her anymore.” Blossom sighed. “Rainbow, after everything you and Cloud have been through together, do you really think you could lose each other just because she has a new job?” “No, it’s just...” She sighed and shook her head, visibly struggling to find the right words. “It’s just that she's had so many changes lately. Hooking up with you guys, getting pregnant, landing a new job. What’s left for me and Cloud?” Fluttershy set down her tea cup to meet Rainbow’s eyes. “What is it you want?” “I dunno,” Rainbow shrugged listlessly, then shot a halfhearted glower my way. “Not that, before you suggest it. I just ... I just want to have something for me. It feels like there might not be any place for me in Cloud’s new life.” I had a pretty good idea of exactly what she needed. “C’mere, you big softy.” Rainbow shifted over, and I immediately wrapped her in a huge bear hug. “You’re my number one best bud, Dash. That’s never changing.” “It better not,” Rainbow grumbled, squeezing me back as hard as she dared. “Or else I’m totally teaching your kid to kick your butt and be the biggest brat ever. Every time I visit I’ll spoil the kid rotten, then leave you to put up with it after I’m gone.” “You already do that with Dinky,” Derpy shot back with a grin. Rainbow smiled proudly and nodded. “Which just goes to show that I’m not bluffing.” She frowned, then amended, “Not that Dinky could ever be bratty or spoiled, but Cloud’s kid’ll be half-Cloud. Much more corruptible.” I smirked and pecked her forehead. “Butthead.” Rainbow snorted and warded me off. “Bah. I’ll teach the kid to call you butthead.” I couldn’t let that pass unchallenged. “So basically, she’ll pick up bad words from you? Yeah, that’s a great way to convince me you’d be a positive influence I’d want to have around my kid.” “I wouldn’t teach her anything too bad,” Rainbow offered in her own defense. “I did just fine with Dinky. Besides, I should leave you something to teach the kid yourself.” She smirked at me. “I’ve got a bet going with Derpy that her first word will be ‘Bang!’” “I can watch my vocabulary around the kids,” I grumbled before turning on a certain walleyed pegasus. “And really, Derpy? You’re betting against me?” “I don’t see it as betting against you so much as observing the situation,” Derpy countered with a grin. “For the record, I’m betting the foal’s first word will be the same as Dinky’s, if only because Rainbow will spend hours trying to coach it into saying her name.” “It wasn’t that much,” Rainbow groused. Judging by her quick change of subject, she knew she didn’t have any chance of convincing us. “So...” She grinned and poked my side. “If you’re retiring, then that means we get to throw you a retirement party! Though since you’re all pregnant and stuff, we can’t make it too crazy.” I grinned and nodded. “So no more than a dozen strippers, got it.” Rainbow rolled her eyes. “I really don’t get the idea behind that. We don’t even wear clothes most of the time, so  what’s so exciting about watching someone take them off?” “It’s more about the presentation and spectacle than what’s underneath the clothes,” I explained to my poor ignorant friend. “With a good enough performance, you could make something as mundane as eating pancakes erotic.” Rainbow frowned skeptically. “I’m tempted to call horseapples on that, but I know that would just make you try to eat pancakes sexily.” “You’re not wrong,” Blossom chimed in. “And Cloud could do it. Granted, that was with cake.” “And muffins,” Derpy added with a grin. “And flowers,” Eepy agreed, flushing slightly. “Way more than I needed to know.” Rainbow glowered at each of the other mares in turn. “Anyway, back to the talking about something that’s not totally gross, Cloud’s party.” She frowned and looked me over. “Maybe we could get a piñata that looks like you.” I rolled my eyes. “Be classy, Dash.” “I’m as classy as I am Dash-y,” Rainbow shot back. “You’re just gassy.” I rolled my eyes even harder. “I can see you’re really upset about losing me.” “I got used to having you around.” She hesitated, her teasing grin fading away. “Besides, I don't like to leave my friends hanging. Or, you know, have them leave me that way. Feels like so much is changing. No more Elements, Twilight's a Princess, you’re a mom, I’m training with the  Wonderbolts ... hard to take anything for granted anymore. And well, I guess I do that with you sometimes. I mean, we’ve been best pals since forever, and now...” She sniffed and wiped her eyes. “I get it. Things change. But what if our friendship is one of those things?” I hugged her again, gently rubbing her back. “It’s not. What do I need to do to convince you that won't happen?” She bit her lip, then shrugged. “I dunno. Just ... something.” I gave her a prompting nudge. “Just about anything’s on the table, Dash.” She took a deep breath. “I ... I want something new. Blossom and Fluttershy hooked up with you, Derpy has you helping her with her kids, and now Twilight’s gonna be your new boss. They’re all getting new things, and I’m just losing stuff. I feel like if our friendship stays the same, it’s just gonna get old and fade into the background. I need to have something to do with all this new stuff you got yourself mixed up in.” Blossom shot a look Rainbow’s way that was half-teasing and half-curious. “Miiight wanna be careful about making such an open-ended request with Cloud. Just saying, you know what she’s going to suggest if you say you want some new special relationship with her.” I probably would’ve done that if the situation wasn’t so serious. Now wasn’t the time to tease Dash. That would come later, and often, but it wasn’t right now. “That’s not what Rainbow wants from me, Blossom.” “Yeah Blossom, quit being so pervy.” Rainbow turned to me, smirking. “Can you believe her, Cloud?” “No idea where she gets such ideas from,” I agreed. “Sad, really,” Rainbow concluded. Blossom snorted and rolled her eyes at both of us. “Oh come on, we were all thinking it. You keep going on about how you want something new and deeper with Cloud, when you two are already so close that sometimes I get jealous.” Fluttershy bit her lip and slowly nodded. “There are a few things Cloud seems much more comfortable talking to Rainbow about than us.” Rainbow looked back and forth between my two lovers. “It’s not like that—it’s just that we’re, well, we’re awesome-adventurous types. So we got that in common. Anyway, it’s because you guys are in a relationship with Cloud that she can’t talk to you about some of the stuff we talk about. Point is, you really don’t need to be worried about me. I’m pretty much the only friend Cloud has that she hasn’t jumped into bed with.” “So you’re basically Cloud’s voice of neutral objectivity?” Derpy asked, grinning and nudging Rainbow. “Cloud’s in so much trouble.” Rainbow scoffed and shook her head. “Oh come on, I am totally reasonably objective. I’m the only pony who can be friends with her without being taken in by her weird sex aura thing.” “My weird sex aura thing?” I repeated incredulously. “You know...” Rainbow waved a hoof vaguely in the air. “How you somehow convince ponies who are otherwise completely sane, normal, and intelligent that it would be a good idea to have sex with you. That.” I cocked my head to the side, trying to figure out what the hay she was saying. “You mean my knack for being charming and fun to hang out with? Because that’s really all there is to it.” “She has a good sense of humor too,” Derpy chimed in. “And shocking as it sounds, she really has been a good influence on the girls.” “And she’s very committed to her friends and family,” Blossom agreed. “Even when she messes up, she always tries to make it right.” “And she’s always willing to help.” Eepy said, beaming at me. “Anytime I ask her to help me take care of my animals, she does it without a moment’s hesitation. At least, before she got pregnant—obviously she can’t do that now.” She was right about that. I was pretty sure that the fact that Angel hadn’t mysteriously disappeared yet made me a borderline saint, but I wisely kept that thought to myself. Besides, I hadn’t come up with a foolproof plan to get rid of the body yet. Rainbow frowned skeptically at Fluttershy. “So basically, you’re saying that Cloud’s great because you have her totally Flutterwhipped?” Blossom chuckled. “Oh, I’d say I’ve got her at least equally Blossomwhipped.” She paused, then frowned. “Um ... Forthwhipped? No, that doesn’t sound good either...” “You tried,” I assured her with a wing pat. “I can’t ask for much more than that.” “Makes sense.” Rainbow smirked at me. “Cloud has to sympathize with anypony who makes a good effort. After all, she’s the most trying pony I know.” She took a deep breath, then nodded to herself. “Okay, so that’s my role hammered out. I keep Cloud from getting too whipped, and I’m the totally level-headed and grounded voice of reason.” “Luna help us all,” Derpy murmured under her breath. “Point is, I’m awesome,” Rainbow continued over her. “And I help Cloud stay awesome by being her number one best bud. If I wasn’t around, you’d probably keep her bare-hooved and pregnant in the kitchen. I mean, she’s already got two out of three, and the kitchen isn’t that far away from the living room...” “See?” I nudged Rainbow, pointedly ignoring how ridiculous her worries about my future were. Not like I’d never been silly. “I need you around, which means you never have to worry about us drifting apart. I’d be lost without my best bud. Besides, the kid’s going to need its honorary unofficial Aunt Boe. Every kid needs a cool aunt or uncle.” “That’s true,” Rainbow agreed, perking up a bit more. “Alula’s a bit young to do that, and Star and Storm would probably turn it into a sibling rivalry thing. Plus, while the rest of Cloud’s family is pretty cool, they’re not me.” “So there we have it,” I concluded, giving her another hug. “You get to be Cool Aunt Boe.” I ruffled her mane. “Were you really that worried?” “’Course not.” She tried to put on a brave show, but I caught the hint of relief in her relaxed shoulders. “Don’t be stupid, stupid.” “Oh Rainbow, you goofball...” I pulled her in for a quick chaste kiss. “I’d never leave you.” I was tempted to pull her in for some quality snuggling time when a worrying thought sprang to mind. “If you make a crack about my breath right after I kiss you, I’m kicking your butt no matter how pregnant I am.” “Weeeell...” Rainbow grinned far too widely for my liking. “I wasn’t gonna say anything, but since you brought it up, it would be great if you could lay off the vinegar bread before you try kissing me. Seriously, it tastes like you sandblasted my mouth right now.” “You brat,” I grumbled. “She’s not wrong,” Blossom treacherously agreed. “I know it helps with your cravings, but please don’t share it. Especially since you kiss me way deeper than you do Dash.” Rainbow nodded sagely. “That’s the mother of your child speaking, Cloud. You should listen.” “Eepy?” I asked, turning to the only mare I could apparently rely on. “Um...” She bit her lip. “It can be a bit strong.” Derpy immediately threw up her hooves. “Don’t ask me. Not that I’m not flattered, but I’d rather not kiss you just to see if your vinegar-breath is really as bad as they say.” “You’re all terrible,” I groused. “Ganging up on the poor pregnant mare.” Still, there was one undeniable fact about the situation. Feeding my seemingly endless cravings could potentially have a negative impact on my sex life. That put things in perspective. “I’ll find a new way to deal with my cravings, okay?” “Small favors,” Rainbow grumbled. I sighed. “I am so unappreciated.” Blossom chuckled and hugged me. Eepy joined in a second later, and Derpy was hot on her hooves. Rainbow rolled her eyes, but she didn’t stay out of the group hug for long. In hindsight, I really should’ve known that Twilight would overdo her new employee orientation. Mostly because Twilight always loves to over-prepare for things, and she absolutely loves telling ponies about things. If not for her being a royal protégé and eventually becoming a princess herself, she probably would’ve gone into teaching or been a librarian. By the time we got around to actually seeing my new office I’d gone through three full days of lecturing, most of which consisted of information I’d either already known or could’ve pretty easily picked up on with common sense. The Guard hadn’t changed that much since all my training at West Hoof, and Storm was picky about running everything by the book. However, I still had two binders full of information Twilight had generously provided to help me get started, not to mention all the reference materials that would no doubt be waiting for me in my office. Twilight—I should probably get used to being a bit more formal and calling her Princess Twilight now that I worked for her—was trotting alongside me with a huge smile on her face. “Remember, if you have any questions at all, I’m always happy to help. I’ll try to get you a copy of my weekly schedule every Monday so you’ll know when I’m available. Just bear in mind that the schedule is subject to change whenever there’s a friendship problem or a pony-eating monster attacks the town.” “Monsters are horribly rude about not giving you at least two weeks advance notice before they show up.” I grinned impishly, but Twilight’s answering nod was a bit too serious. Working for a pony who could be just a touch high-strung and neurotically obsessed with organization would probably take some adjusting after Rainbow’s much more laid-back attitude. I don’t think Dash would care or even notice if I came back from lunch five minutes late. Twilight... Oh well. I’d known what I was getting up to when I took the job. I’d been friends with Twilight before she’d sprouted wings, and while Storm was far too professional to gossip about her boss, I’d heard and seen enough to know what she had to put up with. Besides, Twilight was a sweetheart. A neurotic schedule-obsessed sweetheart, but still a sweetheart. Said sweetheart opened up the door to my new office, grinning as she showed it off. “Here are your bookshelves, I personally organized them for you according to the standards of the Royal Canterlot Library. I also made sure to get you one of the comfiest chairs in the palace, and a desk with plenty of clearance to account for your condition.” “Thanks.” I settled down into the chair, testing it out. It lived up to her claim of being comfy, at least. Maybe a bit too comfy if I was supposed to be getting work done instead of taking a nap. Then again, if my biggest complaint about my new job was that my work chair was too comfortable, I had it pretty good. “I’m looking forward to getting started. It should be fun.” I paused, then amended, “Well, as long as I don’t fail horribly on my first day.” Twilight smiled and gave me a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “I don’t expect you to get everything perfect your first day on the job, especially since this is a bit of an ad hoc position to start with. I think you’ll be fine, and I’m not going to fire you as long as you show up to work and don't do something crazy like set the entire palace ablaze.” I nodded along understandingly. “So no inviting Derpy over, got it,” I grinned. “Just make sure you don’t allow any muffins on the premises.” Twilight started to open her mouth, then closed it. “I was going to say that setting a building made entirely out of crystal on fire should be impossible even for her, but I know better than to tempt fate that blatantly.” “Everyone always says you’re supposed to be really smart,” I agreed. I counted off the rules on my hooves. “So, I have to actually show up for work and I can't set the palace on fire? You’re really drowning me in red tape and regulations, Twi.” “Hardly.” Storm rapped a hoof on the doorframe, a touch too late for the request to be entirely genuine. “I think you will find that most of the rules are either quite reminiscent of what you learned at West Hoof or are simple common sense. I am sure you recall the old standby for handling any uncertainty in the rules.” “If I have to ask if it’d be okay, it’s probably not okay,” I repeated dutifully. It had been a pretty key principle for making sure I didn’t give Rainbow any extra headaches back in my younger and wilder days. That wasn’t likely to be an issue for Twilight now that I’d mostly settled down. Oh Shadow, I was going on about the good old days back before I got old. Soon I’d be shaking my cane at the kids and screaming at them to get off my lawn. Twilight smiled and nodded. “I try to be reasonable—I just want a friendly workplace where everyone is happy and comfortable. There are going to be a few differences from the usual office environment due to the palace also being my home, and some old laws involving that. I know we already went over the basics, but if you’d like an in-depth discussion I’m sure I could extend your orientation for another day. There’s some really fascinating case law regarding—” “I think I’ll be okay,” I quickly assured her before she build up too much enthusiasm for a new round of lecturing. “Back at West Hoof I took a class on the sort of things royal guards are supposed to know, so I should have some idea of what I’m doing.” Twilight smiled and nodded. “You should be fine then. My rules are pretty much a direct copy of Celestia’s, except with less formality and ceremony.” She chuckled and grinned sheepishly, leaning in and whispering. “I really don’t think I’m ever going to get used to having ponies bow to me. It makes me feel so self-conscious.” Evidently her whisper wasn’t quiet enough, because Storm answered. “They do that to show their respect for you and your office, Highness.” “I know,” Twilight’s ears drooped a bit. “But it just ... it’s not like I see myself as better than other ponies just because of these.” She opened up her wings for a second to make her point. “So ... that makes it a bit odd when so many other ponies seem to think that.” I cleared my throat and hopped into the conversation I probably had business getting involved in. “Pretty scary, isn’t it?” Twilight blinked at me, clearly wrong-hoofed by the question. “Um, what?” “I was just thinking.” I looked at her wings, then down at my big bloated belly. “Guess we’ve both been dealing with our bodies going through a lot of crazy changes that have sent our lives down a path we’d never really expected. I know what I’m going through isn’t exactly the same thing, but ... well I dunno about you, but it scares me. I mean, pretty much everything in my life is changing because of this, and now I’m dealing with a lot of new responsibilities. Kind of hard not to constantly worry about what happens if I this screw up. It’s not just my life I’d be ruining anymore, you know?” Twilight bit her lip and nodded. “I ... yes, I think I know what you mean. If I’m honest, all of...” She waved at her own wings, than at the palace itself. “All this was pretty scary at first. But I like to think I’ve done a pretty good job with it. I’m sure you’ll be fine too. You have a pretty good head on your shoulders, and you have Blossomforth and Fluttershy to help you. Whenever I’m not sure about my choices, I can always count on my friends to help me.” Her cheeks flushed a bit as she amended, “I know they’re a bit more than friends, but I’m sure the same principle applies. And there’s always Rainbow, Derpy, or ... well, I’d like to think we’re friends too.” “Yeah, we are.” I grinned. “I suppose there might be one or two differences now that you’re my boss too, but I managed to handle having Rainbow as my boss for years, I’m sure we’ll be fine.” “Of course.” She smiled back at me. “And really, I want to be friends with all my staff anyway. If there’s ever anything bothering you, just let me know and I’ll do whatever I can to help.” Storm softly cleared her throat. “I have found that often we only learn how much we are capable of when we put ourselves to the test. If I refused to do anything new for fear of failure, I would not be captain of Her Highness’ royal guard.” “That’s one way to think about it,” Twilight agreed. “I know that's the only way I’ve been able to figure out what I can really do.” She grinned and playfully nudged my cousin. “Though speaking of change, maybe someday you’ll finally be able to try relaxing a bit and not always being so stiff and formal. I’m sure I’ve told you a dozen times now that unless we’re in a formal setting you don’t have to call me ‘your highness’ or anything like that.” A faint grin quirked Storm’s lips. “Let us not go too crazy with embracing change, Highness.” “Was that a joke?” I asked with a grin. “I didn’t know Storm could do those.” Storm rolled her eyes and deadpanned. “I am fully capable of the laughter.” “I’ll believe it when I see it,” I teased. We all chuckled, including Storm. As far as I’m concerned, that didn’t immediately kill my joke, since there’s a difference between a soft chuckle and full-blown laughter. However, once I was done laughing at my own lame joke, my mind went back to the matter at hoof. “I never would’ve thought I'd wind up working for royalty after everything I’ve been through, but ... here we are.” “Yup,” Twilight agreed with a friendly smile, her horn lighting up as she pulled out a couple charts I recognized from my earlier briefings. “If you’re not sure who you need to go to, just make sure to consult this. I made sure there was a copy in your orientation notebook. As far as the official hierarchy goes, you’re technically a civilian consultant reporting directly to me. However, for most of the day-to-day stuff you’ll be working with Storm since she’s in charge of my guards.” Storm nodded along. “I do not think there should be any issues since you are a civilian consultant rather than a direct subordinate subject to the military chain of command. As I am sure came up at some point during Her Highness’ five-hour presentation on the dress code, you may wear armor in our clan colors without any rank marking. However, for some occasions it might be wiser to remain in civilian dress to avoid any confusion.” With a hint of a dry smile she added, “As for the chain of command, I think we shall get along quite well. We are family after all, not to mention that I am impervious to your charms and will thus be unflappably objective if a conflict should arise.” I smirked at her. “I’ve still got my awesome-older-cousin-you-look-up-to charms to fall back on.” “Of course you do,” Storm deadpanned. “Yes, making sure Cloud didn’t charm half my staff into having some sort of wild sex party during office hours was one of of my top concerns.” Twilight impressed me with how much sarcasm she managed to fit into a single sentence. “Only half?” I tsked and shook my head. “You wound me, Twilight.” She just rolled her eyes and didn’t rise to the bait. “Anyway, I was thinking of setting up a nursery in one of the empty rooms in this wing for anypony that needs somewhere to drop their kids off while working at the palace.” “That should come in handy once I’m no longer a wide load,” I agreed. “Though I suspect it’ll be a while before I really need to worry about daycare. Eepy mostly works out of her house, and you and Rainbow are both being really nice about maternity leave. Not to mention I’ve got Derpy and Rainbow to fall back on foalsitting.” Twilight grinned. “Well if I’m being completely honest, I probably would end up stealing your kid from the daycare center for some royal pampering at some point.” “You will not be alone in that, Highness,” Storm murmured. “If you hope to see me acting slightly less formal, exposing me to my new once-removed cousin would do nicely.” She paused, the grimaced. “Never tell my sister I said this, but she was right: it does sound better to call Cloud’s foal my niece than my once-removed cousin, regardless of accuracy.” I grinned and nodded along. “Considering Rainbow’s already claimed the post of unofficial aunt despite not being related to me at all, I’m pretty sure we can get away with calling my cousins unofficial aunts too.” Twilight nodded along. “I suppose there’s no harm in using informal terms as long as we all know what the proper one is. And as long as Cloud’s kid is gathering up unofficial aunts, I wouldn’t mind being added to the tally. I think I’d be a pretty good aunt.” “If she has a princess for an unofficial aunt, does that make the kid royalty?” I teased. “I’m not sure it works that way,” Twilight shot back with a grin. “I think the most we could say is that an unofficial aunt would make your child unofficial royalty. I can buy a few birthday presents, and help out with a recommendation letter so your child can go to a good school.” I chuckled and shook my head. “Kid’s not even born yet, and you’re thinking about what college it’ll go to. That’s so ... you.” “Education is an important part of child-rearing,” Twilight answered. “Though I suppose we could wait and see what your child’s talents are ... and whether it’s a pegasus, unicorn, or earth pony. I probably shouldn’t fill out an application for Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns unless I know you’re having one.” “That would make sense,” I agreed. We were supposed to get a solid answer on that before too much longer. The next round of tests would be able to confirm if the foal was sprouting wings or growing a forehead bump. “Might be handy if it did come out as a unicorn. If nothing else, it would avoid the inevitable fights over who gives my kid flying lessons.” “I do hope my name is on the list of contenders,” Storm grunted. “Of course,” I assured her. “Though the tournament bracket didn’t turn out too great for you. You’ll have to fight Dad in the first round, and Rainbow Dash in the second.” “Nopony will ever find the bodies,” Storm deadpanned. “And on that cheerful note...” I stretched out in my comfy chair, taking a look around. “I really need to add a bit of personality to this place. I’m pretty sure I’ve got all twenty pages of your policies on acceptable office and desk decoration.” “Don’t forget appendices A through G,” Twilight helpfully reminded me. “Of course not.” I tapped my empty desk, frowning in thought. “Still, I need to work out something to do with the place. I mean, I’ve gotta add some of my own personal flair to the office, if only so I’ll have something to look at other than a bunch of paperwork.” Twilight grinned at me. “Actually, I took the liberty of making a few preparations for you. Twink should be by any minute now with...” A knock on the door announced the arrival of Magus Twinkleshine. She tossed a quick salute Storm’s way and a perfunctory bow to Twilight. “Captain, Highness. And yes, Twilight, I know I don’t have to bow or use titles, but if I don’t my CO gets grumpy.” “I do not get grumpy,” Storm grumbled. “I merely point out that neglecting protocol in an informal setting makes it more likely an accidental breach of decorum will occur in public.” I couldn’t resist taking advantage of the opening. “She sounds pretty grumpy to me.” “She’s not too upset,” Twilight assured us. “And I understand her concerns, even if I trust all of you to have good judgement about that kind of thing.” I grinned and nodded. “I know better than to smack your butt and call you a hottie in public.”   Twilight just rolled her eyes, while Twinkleshine snorted. “Okay, now I see why Tor warned me about your sense of humor.” My smile vanished in an instant. I’d almost forgotten Twinkleshine was dating Dad. Worse, she was still dating Dad. I could’ve accepting him having a bit of a fling with a younger mare. I mean, I wouldn’t have loved it, but he’s only equine and Mom had been gone for years. But they’d been together for months at this point, so it was hard not to wonder if maybe it was a bit more serious than that. Twinkleshine must have picked up on the massive spike in awkward tension in the room, because she smiled nervously and used her magic to lift up a box. “Um, your father gave me a few things for you. He thought you might like a few family photos for your desk.” “Oh.” I took the box and glanced through it. “Uh, thanks.” “Of course.” Twinkleshine glanced at me for a moment, then quickly broke eye contact. As one would expect from a princess of friendship, Twilight spotted the awkward tension and jumped in to defuse it. “Was there anything else you needed, Cloud? I’m sure Twinkleshine could pick up anything else you wanted from your family.” “Um...” I spared a quick look at the mare in question, then shook my head. “Can’t think of anything I’d need, no.” “Uh, right.” Twinkleshine coughed and took a step back towards the door. “Well then ... maybe I should stop interrupting and let Her Highness finish your orientation?” Twilight frowned and looked back and forth between the two of us. “Is something wrong?” “I think it has to do with the Knight-Magus being involved with my uncle,” Storm answered with her usual bluntness. “Oh, right.” Twilight smiled reassuringly at both of us. “Well, if you two need a bit to talk things over and get it settled, that’s fine. Storm and I can wait outside.” Oh horseapples. That was the last thing I wanted. I scrambled to find a diplomatic way out of the situation. “I’d hate to interrupt you.” For once, Twinkleshine and I seemed to be on the same page. “I couldn’t ask you to interrupt your business just so I can tend to a personal matter.” Twilight’s smile just grew as she evidently misunderstood our frantic scrambling for a way out and took the modest at face value. “Oh don’t worry, I’d hate to force you two to leave things unresolved just so I could stick to my schedule. Besides, I included flex time in my day plans for a reason. Come on, Storm, it’s been a few weeks since we checked all the supply closets, and I’m sure they need to be re-optimized. Spike might be my number one assistant, but sometimes he puts things away without consulting the chart first.” Twilight and Storm stepped out, leaving me alone in a room with a mare I’d have preferred to avoid for the next several decades. I briefly considered going for the window again, but I was probably way too pregnant to pull that off this time. Plus Twilight would probably follow up on the whole thing now that she’d detected a friendship problem. If I didn’t sort things out on my own she’d no doubt constantly offer to help in that innocently friendly way nice ponies always do, which would make it just about about impossible to stick to my current strategy of ignoring the problem and hoping it would magically go away on its own. Twinkleshine bit her lip, then took a deep breath and settled into the chair opposite my desk. “So ... uh ... I guess you’re not too wild about me and Tor, are you?” I flinched a bit. “It’s not—I mean, you seem nice enough, and I guess Dad likes you.” A moment later I realized how stupid that sounded. “I mean, of course he likes you. He wouldn’t be dating you if he didn’t. It’s just...” I struggled for the words. “It’s weird.” “I think I know what you mean,” she agreed with a chuckle. “If it’s any consolation, it’s strange for me too. I don’t have a lot of experience with dating stallions who already have kids, let alone a daughter who’s the same age as me. And ... well, it’s not hard to guess what some ponies think when they see a young mare dating an older stallion: I’m either a gold digger or his mid-life-crisis trophy mare.” “I’m pretty sure you’re not either of those,” I assured her. “Dad ... he took losing Mom pretty hard—we all did—but I don’t think he’s so broken up he’d get involved in a stupid relationship. Plus you’re friends with Twilight, and Storm seems to like you. I don’t think either of them put up with a mare who’s taking advantage of Dad. And ... well he seems pretty happy with you.” Twinkleshine smiled softly. “He really is a nice guy. And ... well, I know he’s a bit worried about how you’re handling us being together.” “Oh.” I pulled out one of the pictures from Twinkleshine’s box, a photo of me back in my West Hoof day, standing in between Mom and Dad. I took a deep breath. “It’s gonna be a long time before this isn’t weird, but I’ll work on it. It’s not like I hate you or think you’re not good enough for Dad or anything, it’s just...” “I’m not your mother,” Twinkleshine concluded. “He’s ... he’s had a rough time with that too. For the first couple months, he kept bouncing back and forth between feeling like he was betraying her memory and telling himself she would want him to be happy. I can’t pretend I know what your family’s going through, but I know it’s not easy for any of you. Your sister’s really not sure what to make of me, since...” “Yeah.” A hint of a grin tugged at my lips. “I suppose that’s one good thing I can say about Dad dating a mare my age: we’ll never need to worry about developing any sort of pseudo-maternal relationship with me.” She snorted softly. “Yeah, at least there’s that.” Twinkleshine hesitated a moment, then said. “But ... well, I would like to get along with you. I mean, you seem nice enough, and I know it would be a load off Tor’s shoulders if we were on good terms.” I guess I’d been so wrapped up in my own confused feelings about Dad dating that I’d never really stopped to think about how he was handling it. In my defense, I had an awful lot going on in my life. “You seem pretty alright too. I guess we might as well get to know each other. It’ll make things easier on Dad, and if the last couple months are anything to go by I don’t think you’re going to spontaneously vanish if I ignore you hard enough.” “I wasn’t planning on it,” Twinkleshine agreed with a faint grin. “Glad we could clear the air a bit. Maybe sometime after work we could hang out for a bit? I know Tor would like for the four of us to do something together.” “I’ll think about it.” I pointedly glanced down at my swollen belly. “Though it might have to wait for a bit. Right now I’m not so much for going out and doing things.” I smirked as a wonderfully evil thought sprang to mind. “You know, if you marry Dad you’ll technically be a grandmother in a few months. Just throwing that out there.” Twinkleshine blinked and shook her head. “Ooookay, I hadn’t thought of that, but ... yeah. Thanks for giving me something new to have nightmares about.” “You’re welcome.” I thought about it for a second, then offered her my hoof. “Looking forward to working with you.” I gave that a moment to sink in, then added. “Please don’t go start a fight with civilians or something that’ll make my job harder.” “I’ll do my best to avoid any bar brawls,” Twinkleshine deadpanned. “Glad to hear it.” Another fun idea popped into my head. “So, you went to school with Twilight, right? I bet you have some fun stories about her...” “A few,” Twinkleshine admitted. “But don’t forget I went to West Hoof with you. We might not have been as close, but I did hear one or two stories. Something about you, a student from the music school, and a background pony spell that wasn’t quite strong enough...” “Touché,” I bowed my head, jokingly conceding defeat. “I think we’re going to get along just fine, Twinkleshine.”