~ V ~
Of Defending Exes & Town-Wide Hysteria
ALRIGHT, SO LET'S SEE HERE.
The absence of light made it hard to see in Death’s domain, but this wasn’t really wasn’t an issue to most guests—they either tended to be dead, and thus had trouble seeing anyways, or they were a dragon, for which their reptilian vision picked up the slack.
STOPS CARING ONE DAY... DOES EVERYTHING HE EVER WANTED TOO... HURTS THOSE CLOSE TO HIM BECAUSE OF IT... SWEARS ON HIS LIFE TO NEVER DO IT AGAIN...
Spike cringed at the ellipsis abuse.
FALLS IN LOVE... DOESN'T THINK HIMSELF WORTHY OF THAT LOVE... BREAKS UP... LOVE GOES MISSING... GOES TO A BAKERY... STOPS A STICK UP WITH A STAND-UP... GOES TO PREVIOUS LOVE OF HIS LIFE TO FIND THE CURRENT LOVE OF HIS LIFE... WHOM HE BROKE UP WITH...
Death pulled the quill from the papers on the desk. He picked the sheets up, shuffled them into place, then placed them aside.
"Do we, uh, have to start the next report this way?”
Death looked up. HOW DO YOU MEAN?
"Don’t you think it’s a bit much to restate everything that’s happened?" Spike asked in a tone of uncertainty, studying the expression of Death—a wasted effort, as it never changed, but it made the drake feel better anyway. He and Death were starting to get along, if that’s what the short-term for ‘no longer fearing for your life’ was, but even still, the drake felt uncomfortable in giving him criticisms. "I know your bosses are probably not a cheery bunch, but if they’ve already read the previous report, don’t you think they’ll get annoyed by having all the events stated again at the start of next report?”
Death remained silent.
"That’s what redundant means, right?” Spike asked, slowly curling into himself. “And we should avoid being redundant for the sake of brevity, right? Because that’s always what T-Twilight says.”
Death remained silent.
"If you're going to criticized me for my t-tendency to tell, then isn’t f-fair I d-do the same, when my criticism is just as v-valid?”
Death remained silent.
Then, after a moment, the reaper took the page he’d been writing, crunched it into a ball, and tossed it into the infinite recesses of his robe.
THOSE CROOKS SHOULD HAVE BROKEN YOUR JAW FOR THE BENEFIT OF EVERYBODY. Death pulled out a drawer from his desk and pulled out a stack of papers, closing the drawer and laying the papers on the desk. He hunched over them; a quill pinched in his fingertips. HOWEVER, IT WOULD BE TO YOUR BENEFIT TO REMEMBER THAT FEW THINGS IN LIFE ARE FAIR.
Spike sat back in his chair, crossing his arms and playfully rolling his eyes. "Tell me about it."
NO, said Death. YOU WILL BE TELLING ME ABOUT YOUR DATE WITH RARITY.
Spike sighed, letting his head drop forward. "You just had to use the word date, didn't you?"
Death chuckled. YES.
"It's just a door, you've knocked on tons of these before."
Spike raised his claw to the door.
"Of course, it's the door to your former crush." The claw did not knock as its owner found more comfort in talking to himself. "Y'know, the one that rejected you then fell in love with you afterward, the same one you rejected while sleeping standing up."
For the next five minutes, there was no knocking or talking.
Spike dropped the claw. "Eh, she's probably not here anyway."
He turned and walked away, intent for the safety of his own.
'Rainbow is probably in there eating ice-cream with Rarity,' he thought to himself, his steps becoming slower. 'They'd just get mad if I intruded. I'll just go home, tell Twilight where Rainbow is, then just whole away in the basement for the rest of my life.'
Spike nodded his head. 'Sounds good to me.'
He meant to take another step; the only needed to enter the swarm of the town's street, and yet, his body did not move. It made sense. He should leave. Rainbow would be there, and his existence would just be a problem to everyone. Everything would be okay if he just took himself out of the picture.
Spike knew what the right thing was to do, so of course, he did the complete opposite. He turned back around and went back to the door, his heart hammering against his chest. Every step made him feel light, he dug his claw into his scaly pocket and pulled out the vial.
'I...I don't have to drink all of it.' Trembling, his right claw plucked off the cap to the vial. 'Just a bit for courage. I can deal with both Rarity and Rainbow and not have to worry about them once the effect is over.'
The vial pressed against his lips.
'Doing this doesn't make you anything more, just reveals who you really are.' He tilted his head back. 'Needing a little help to get there doesn't make you a coward, just makes life easier. Everything you do in that state is things you would do otherwise if you didn't care enough.'
Spike closed his eyes, tilted the vial up, and awaited the taste of the liquid. It probably would have tasted bitter, but Spike would never know, had he not paid more attention to himself than the world around him—feeling his face smash right into a door he walked into.
"Yes yes!" a voice said from the other side. "I'm coming I'm coming. Please stop throwing yourself at my door."
Spike refrained from throwing himself at her door. He stumbled back, shaking his head, the world loading again, the first item to do so being the vial tube in the air. He didn't have time to think or feel, acting first as he thrust out his claw, grabbing the of the vial just as the door opened behind it.
"Welcome to the Carousel Boutique!" Rarity greeted with her eyes closed, letting the drake cork the cap back into the vial. "How may I help you on this fine...oh, it's you." Her eyes were no longer closed.
Spike chuckled nervously. "Hey, uh, Rarity. How's uh, how's today going for you?"
"Fair." She peered at him. Despite them being on eye-level, it still felt like to Spike she was looking down at him. "Do you require something of me?"
"Uh." Spike exhaled, blinking. "Not of you exactly." He gulped. "Is Rainbow around?"
Rarity gazed at him, not saying or doing something, the breeze and distant hoofsteps the only sounds being heard. Spike shifted in place, unable to keep eye contact with the mare, pretending to look at nearby objects. He could still feel her gaze; it pierced him to its very core.
"Rainbow and I haven't been on the greatest of terms," Rarity then said, causing the drake to look back. "Your relationship and callousness saw to that. So why would she be here?"
"Pinkie said she stopped by here," Spike said. "Would have been late last night."
"Suppose I do remember finding her at my door last night," she giggled haughtily. "Just after yours and my walk together." She placed a hoof against her chin. "Strange how Pinkie is keeping better track of your marefriend than you are."
"About that." At that moment, Spike realized he messed up by not drinking the vial. "Rainbow and I are, uh, not um, marefriend and drakefriend anymore. We kinda broke up late night, so yeah, you were right."
Spike had expected another haughtily giggle, a more narrowed gaze or a grin, a 'told-you-so' or anything befitting the victory, and yet, Rarity remained ever quiet. She tilted her head, her hoof moving up to her lips and sliding across. "My my, you must be positivity devastated!"
Her tone wasn't sarcastic, and this worried Spike. "Well, I mean, a little." He looked down. "Locked myself in a basement and ate ice cream for a few days, but everyone else is like that, no?"
"Don't be so foolish as to think that every heartbreak is the same!" Rarity rested her forehooves on his shoulders, bringing her muzzle closer to his. "You mustn't act strong when you're breaking apart inside! Repressed feelings only boil, I should know."
Rarity let him go and stepped aside.
"Quickly, come inside!"
Spike didn't want to. It didn't seem like Rainbow was still here, and Rarity's odd behavior set him on edge. But she was right about his heartbreak, and maybe, just maybe, he could get some of this pain off his chest.
Seeing as he didn't have much of a choice, he stepped inside the boutique.
Rarity stuck her head outside, seeing a figure standing in the alley across the street. She nodded her head and the figure disappeared. Then, with a smile that stretched across her lips, she closed the door to the outside world.
…
"..."
THAT GIRL WAS PLANNING SOMETHING.
"..."
Spike shrugged.
"Please, please! I insist, sit back on the couch and put up your feet."
Spike did so, but he did so cautiously.
"Relax darling. I bear no ill will towards you." Rarity walked past the couch on her way to the kitchen, glancing back at him. "Despite our past, you are still my friend, albeit one needing a listening ear. Let me get us some drinks before we begin."
Rarity left.
Spike didn't know what to do. No one was in the room, so he didn't feel so bad about shifting in place, but he had no idea what he was supposed to be looking at or doing. His comic heroes always sat back with their feet up, hooves supporting the back of their heads as they kept perfectly still.
Spike was not such a hero.
"Tea or coffee?" came a voice from the kitchen.
"Coffee," Spike said, hoping his tone didn't sound too nervous. "Black."
"Plain and simple," the voice said, becoming more distant. "I like it."
Ten minutes passed.
"I can't imagine the heartbreak!" Rarity said, sitting in the chair opposing the couch. A table sat between the duo, two steaming cups atop it. "The end of my first love had me devastated and locked away; I wouldn't see Sweetie or my parents for weeks on end. How you're here, now, looking for the very mare that broke your heart!" Her horn glowed blue, the same aurora forming around her cup of tea. "This truly speaks of the depth of your character!"
"I..." Spike leaned forward, staring at his reflection in the cup. He saw a conflicted face, one that was becoming more unrecognizable by the hour. "Guess you're right. Most ponies would have just locked themselves away for longer, right?"
"I do believe that is the case with most ponies," she giggled into her drink, taking a sip. "Then again, you're not like most ponies. You're a gentledrake, and that is not an easy title to win from a lady such as myself."
Spike picked up his cup, the heat lost on the scales of his palm. "You have to be a dragon and nice, right?"
"Mmhmm." She placed the cup back down, looking back the drake. She smiled, batting her lashes. "Now now, whatever happened between you and Dash! Such a sweet dragon-like yourself should not be made to suffer anymore, and I'm hoping to assuage your fears and your doubts."
"I...I'm not sure about that, Rarity." He held his cup before the lips. "Probably best if I hashed this out with Rainbow directly. Talking behind her back won't make anything better."
"Certainly a respectable attitude to hold, but are you sure it's for the best?" This caused the drake to halt from taking a sip, looking up from the rim of the cup. "You and Rainbow are still upset and unsure about yourselves. Are you sure you should confront her with your feelings unprocessed? That you won’t say something you’ll later come to regret?”
Spike sipped on his coffee to buy himself some time; it was as bitter as his thoughts.
'She's...right,' Spike thought to himself, not knowing what he was supposed to be feeling. 'I need to find Rainbow so she can read that letter, but besides that, what do I feel about her?' Rage. Sadness. Fear. Disgust. They all coursed through the drake at the very thought of her name. 'I made the right call; there's no denying that. But why do I hate myself so much for it—why do I hate Rainbow as well?'
Another voice spoke, deep from his subconscious mind: one that made him shiver and irritated every time he heard it.
'Why wouldn't you hate Rainbow? She's everything you want to be,' the voice said inside his mind. 'She's cool where your dorky, confident where you're insecure, a success where you're a...number oneassistant.'
Spike closed his eyes, suppressing the voice.
'Don't fight me. You know I'm right.' The voice even laughed for effect. 'I'm the dragon within you, and by nature, dragons are competitive. To fight against your feelings of jealousy and the rage behind them is to fight against your very nature.'
Spike opened his eyes, seeing something other than his face in the reflection in his cup.
'Deep down, you wanted her to be the onelooking up to you, not the other way around.' The voice let the words sink in. 'You want that to be the case with most ponies, and yet, you shy away from your nature. Letting me take the reigns doesn't have to turn you into a beast, just the dragon you so desperately want to see yourself as.'
"So, how about it dear?"
Spike looked up.
'Stop repressing yourself, Spike. Let us in.'
"You shouldn't feel so shameful about opening up." Rarity tittered, glancing downward with a smirk. "Rainbow didn't give you any thought before she opened her mouth to me. I won't use anything you say against you...or her."
Spike sipped on his coffee, made a decision, and placed the cup on the table. With a sigh, he sat back. "I'm trusting you here, Rarity."
"A lady always knows when to hold back her gossip."
It still didn't feel right to Spike. Something about the whole situation made him uneasy, but then again, the day had already gotten to him from the robbery. He inhaled and exhaled deeply, then spoke. "For...a while now, I knew things weren't working going to work between Rainbow and me."
"I saw the same thing from the very start." Spike flinched, and Rarity giggled nervously. "But such knowledge must have been tearing you apart from the inside-out! Please, recount the horrible experience!"
Spike hated how she made him out to be the victim, but hated himself more for enjoying the influx of pity. "Guess it has been kinda rough."
The words felt hollow and fake, but it made the other mare pull up closer in her chair. Something felt so wrong about appearing as the victim, and as if to answer his angst, a memory of his break up appeared. When they had broken up, it was Rainbow who cried and flew away, and him who walked home with slumped shoulders.
"It's just that, we're so different, y'know?" Spike began. "She was just this awesome mare, and I was this lousy dragon. There's more to me then I knew, she saw that for sure, but I could never be the same dragon she fell in love with. I could never be him again."
"Hate to agree with you there," Rarity said, close enough to rest her forehooves on the table. " At the end of the day, you will always be our Spikey-Wikey, and to expect anything more out of you is to defy your very character." She then spoke in a whisper. "Not like she was worthy of you from the beginning."
Spike flinched, feeling his claw clench. He didn't comment. "And...I don't know why, but I also kinda hate her for it, y'know. Giving me the impression that we could actually be together, that I could actually be that dragon—it's just a false hope I can never accomplish."
The words hurt to say. They hurt him, for, while they had some merit in his head, they pricked his heart with every syllable.
"The opposite of true love, if I may be so bold to say." Rarity got off her seat. She began to circle around the table. "True love is perfect love. Why? Because we accept our soul mates for their flaws and their strength, we're grateful for their every aspect as they are of our own, needing nothing more than what's already present."
Rarity came to the couch, resting her hoof on his claw.
"In that exact philosophy," Rarity began, running her hoof down his wrist, "is the very difference between Rainbow and me." She giggled, raising her muzzle to his, their snouts now touching. Her eyes were half-lidded; his, wide in surprise. "I wouldn't expect you to be anything more, my dear Spikey-Wikey, than what you already are."
Rarity's lips. They were plush with a tad of velvet lipstick, which she gave a small lick and nibble. They inched towards him, cutting the distance between them, the scenario exactly as he dreamed about when he was younger.
"You two never kissed, did you?" Rarity purred, nuzzling against his cheek. "A kiss cements a relationship, and since you two never did..." she kissed his cheek, which burned hotter after the contact. "It means you never dated, just a slightly more intimate relationship with the friend. The same could be said of Fluttershy and me sometimes."
Spike berated himself for the image that came into his mind.
"You are still pure, my sweet innocent dragon." Rarity pulled back, breathing through her lips and onto his. "You are still a prince trying to find a princess, and I know just where I can find one."
Rarity went in for the kill. Her lips were before his. A mere inch, and the act would be done. A new relationship from the ashes of his last, with the previous love of his life and a childhood dream come true. She was doing all the work, and unlike before, he just had to do nothing.
"Find," Spike said, halting the white lips. Rarity looked up at him, and he looked down at her. "I...I still need to find Rainbow Dash." He then slid back on the couch, pulling himself away from temptation. "There's this letter for her from the Wonderbolts, and it expires at the end of today."
Rarity groaned, losing her seductive expression. "Are you sure she's what you want to focus on, especially at the present moment."
"I...am." Spike gulped. "At least, to give her the letter. I don't want to truly be the reason why her dream becomes ruined." He shook his head. "No. I want to see her succeed, to be happy, and for that to happen; I have to act now."
These words didn't hurt him so much. He stood from the couch, looking down at the mare. "So Rainbow was here trashing talking me last night. Fine, I probably deserve it." He came to her end of the couch, bending a knee so they were on eye-level. "But I need to know why she came here, if she's still here, or a hint as to where she went next."
Rarity huffed.
"Very well," she said, hopping off the couch. "Come now; your gift is upstairs."
She went upstairs to where the gift apparently was.
Spike did not follow at first. Instead, he looked between his legs, and looked at the absence of the thing that made him a male.
"I'm losing more and more faith in you."
Spike went up the stairs, the only uping he'd done in some time.
YOU ARE A MALE, CORRECT?
"Hope so."
NO, said Death, shuffling back to the first page. I MUST KNOW. IF YOU ARE IN FACT A FEMALE, WHICH SEEMS TO BE THE CASE THE MORE YOU GO ON, THERE ARE SOME PRONOUNS I NEED TO CHANGE.
"Yes," replied Spike. "I am a dude."
ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT?
"Of course I'm sure!" Spike threw up his claws. "You really think I made it this far without knowing?"
MANY POOR SOULS LIKE YOU HAVE PASSED THROUGH THAT SAME DOOR, said Death, his tone strangely comforting. It did not comfort Spike one bit. THEY LIVED LIVES OF SOLITUDE EVEN IN SOCIETY. THEY WERE NEVER TAUGHT WHEN THEY WERE YOUNG, AND MISUNDERSTOOD THE SIGNS THAT MADE THEM THE OPPOSITE.
"You've had boys that thought they were girls and girls that thought they were a dude?"
THAT'S PUTTING IT SIMPLY, said Death. THEY WERE MISINFORMED INSTEAD OF INTENT ON THEIR CHOICE.
"Wow." Spike blinked at that. Big or hard thoughts (he still swears he's not female) always made him blink in sunrises. Twilight had dubbed it 'blink and finger in mouth galore': his defensive mechanism to buy a few moments to work out a complex issue and minimize how much of a fool he looked like.
Everypony figured this out for themselves whenever they asked him algebra questions.
"Weird to think you can go through life without knowing what you are, or who you are."
OF COURSE YOU WOULD CLING TO THAT, said Death, sitting forward. SO?
"I'm a male!" Spike said, his tone wavering. These questions about the validity of his masculinity weren't helping his fragile confidence in the slightest.
A HUNDRED PERCENT?
Spike hesitated. "Y-Yes!"
YOU SURE? SOUNDED LIKE A NINETY-FIVE PERCENT TO ME.
"Since when does having the parts make you a male or female."
For the best interest of everyone alive and dead, Death didn't reply to that. He rose his quill and tapped at the gender box. He looked back up to Spike, and would've offered a weak smile were it not for the structure of his skull to always be grinning.
"I've already told you! What, do you want me to put it on the table?"
Death didn't reply for the best interest of himself.
"Not only that, but who are you to talk?" Spike leaned forward in his seat and pointed an index claw/finger/whatever menacingly. "Last I check, you're all just bone and robe. What could you possibly be packing down there?"
For the first time in a long while, Death was glad he was grinning.
Spike lost the remains of his confidence. "A-Are you packing down there?"
Death kept grinning.
"I...I don't believe you!" Spike fell back in the chair, shaking his head. "W-We're putting this rest, here and the now, you and me, on the table before us."
Death kept grinning
WOULDN'T WANT TO PUT YOU TO SHAME HERE.
And then Spike made a boner joke.
"She was quite rude and profane in speaking of you; I hope you know."
Spike really didn't want to know, but following his past-love now sorta kinda-love made him have to listen.
"Rainbow Dash is my friend, so I love her to death, but dear Celestia, I wanted to slap the mare up the back of the head for the things she said about you." They carried on down the corridor on the second floor. It never seemed to end. "She's heated, I know, but some of her words weren't brought about by anger. It's deep pondering propelled outward, so even if you'd carried on longer, the relationship was doomed anyway."
Rarity stopped walking, looking over her shoulder back at him. "Though it's no fault of your own, of course."
Spike smiled and nodded. He had a hard time believing that.
"Rainbow is just a girl that wants a lot out of life, no shame in that." Rarity continued walking; they were only a few feet from the door at the end of the hall. "But to base other ponies on the metric she bases herself is unfair. I don't look down on anypony else because their skills in fashion are inferior to my own."
"I, uh, don't think Rainbow is like that," Spike squeaked out, earning a backward gaze. It strained his throat further. "Just because she's good at flying doesn't mean she looks down on you, just look at her and Fluttershy."
"Now darling, I don’t want you to take any offense from this." Rarity placed her forehoof on the knob of the door, but looked back at him first. "But if that truly were the case, then why did you feel the need to break up with a mare that expected nothing from you? Surely, the tension of her expectations created unnecessary stress on an already stressful life."
"It...did?" He pulled a 'blink and finger to lip galore.' "And, I do?"
"Why of course!" Rarity said with a smile, letting his claw slip from the door when he was too dazed to notice. She even stepped away from it. "You are the number-one assistant to Twilight Sparkle, cleaning up her messes and dealing with her lovable eccentrics is already a worthy job. Now with her as Princess, your work is doubled."
Spike thought back to his 'added work,' which consisted of more therapy sessions, more late cups of Joe (not the pony), and whatever paperwork 'dragon ambassador' (nation unknown) could privilege him in seeing and placing in the 'accept' or 'reject' bins.
Twilight had it much harder than him, but pretending it was the other way around filled him with a guilty pleasure.
"Guess my life isn't so easy as everypony thinks it is." He nodded his head, liking the idea of ponies thinking he had the same worth ethic as his best friend. "Maybe that's why doing runs in the morning with Rainbow was so tough."
"I must admit, after a hard day at work, I treat myself to a glass of wine and light reading on the couch." Rarity stood before him now, smilingly sweetly. "We don't always have to be pushing ourselves. Some days, we deserve to relax."
Spike blinked. "But, Rainbow Dash relaxes all the time."
"Even worse," Rarity said, placing a hoof on his wrist. "While she pulls you away from work to run—and might I add you're already in terrific shape—she's spent the whole day sleeping. Does she ever tell you to run faster or push harder?"
"Well...yeah."
"Just as I thought!" Rarity tugged on his wrist, trying to turn him around. "You've been absolutely spent working while she has been napping, and she's wondering why you do not perform nearly as well? Seems like even more unfair expectations, to be honest with you."
"But...she always so so honest."
"Darling, being honest doesn't make you nice, or kind." Rarity tugged harder at his wrist, standing next to him now. "Rainbow honestly doesn't deserve you. Let's go back downstairs, and—" she licked her lips "—finish what we started."
Spike let himself be turned around, but didn't step forward. "What...what about Rainbow?"
"What about the mare has been unfair to you and talking behind your back?" Rarity spat, inhaling sharply through her nostrils. She exhaled through her mouth. "You know what? Fine. She's already off finding your replacement, but since you care so much for her career, I'll send a letter to Twilight to the bar she's currently in."
"Replacement?" Spike said, tone lost. "I thought she was hurting as much as I was."
"She was," Rarity said. "Got over it rather quickly, I must add. Why, did you think a mare like her would be hung up on you forever?"
"No. I was just...it's not that I want her to be unhappy, but I thought..."
"That ship has since long sailed, my dear." Rarity nodded back at the stair. "It's not that big of surprise she got over you so quickly. Now let us go downstairs."
Spike stepped forward. "You're sure she's over me? That she's happy and better off?"
"Undoubtedly. I could laugh at you like she did last night if it'll make you feel better?" The drake did not move nor say a word. He just gazed down and was silent. "Thinking or asking about Rainbow isn't doing you any favors. Come now, let us get the letter written and our drinks finished."
Rarity went down a step, but did not go down another when her charge failed to follow. He was staring at the door. "Aren't you coming, dear?"
Spike looked back at her. "What's behind the door?"
"Nothing special," she said with a shrug. "It's just where Rainbow and I spent our time together." She snickered. "Still probably a mess from all the pastries where shared. If it's alright with you, I'd like us to go downstairs first."
"I...see." Spike narrowed his eyes at her and took a few steps back. "If that's the case, do you mind if I take a quick peek inside? I'll be down right afterward."
Rarity went back up that step, her eyes just as narrowed. "Your tone? I'm reading it, Spiky. And I very much do not appreciate your suspicion of me."
"Sorry," he said, taking another few steps backward. He was close to the door. "My unstable emotions must have me outta whack still. Pinkie said Rainbow came here because she had something to do."
"Yeah. Talk badly about you."
"See, I would believe that." Spike had his back to the door, raising his claw to its knob. "But you said it yourself—you and Rainbow weren't exactly friends again. She could have gone to Applejack or Fluttershy, yet she came to you."
"Have you ever considered that she might have gone to the mare that's dealt with the love affairs of the same dragon?" Rarity shot back, her hoofsteps forward louder than her voice. "That the reason for the hole in our friendship is the same reason for the hole in her heart? You dated her, Spike, you should know Dash better than that."
Rarity stood before him. "She could have gone to anyone and they would have given her wisdom. But for me?" She raised her hoof and placed it on his claw, sliding it off the knob. "Rainbow went to me because I had experience. She wouldn't have stayed as long as she did had I mere trivialities to spout."
Rarity stared into his eyes, any ounce of compassion lost from her expression. "What you will find in that room will make this situation worse for everyone involved, including yourself." She pulled back. "Rainbow has already moved on, and you should do the same. Stop caring so much about things that don't matter—that was an aspect all of us appreciated on that day, despite all the damages."
Rarity walked forward.
"You're right."
Rarity stopped. She turned around.
"I do care about things that don't matter at the end of the day." Spike chuckled, looking down. "That if I stopped caring so much, my life would be better. My body keeps crying out to be like that again, to drink this tiny little vial and all my problems will be washed away."
Rarity tilted her head.
"But it feels too easy, and wrong while I'm at it." He raised his head, meeting her gaze straight on. His words did not waver. "It's like letting something else enter my body and do all the hard things in life for me, to be right when I should and act when I'm afraid. To make the hard call without a sweat, so I can live an easy life once it's done."
He flung his arm right. "But that life wouldn't be mine! Any improvement, any character, none of that can happen if someone does all the hard stuff for me! I care too much about stuff that does not matter, but at least I get to choose what I care about!"
His claw gripped the knob, turned it, and threw the door open.
Spike then turned around, and wanted to cry at what he saw.
OH. SO YOU DON'T STRUGGLE WITH THOSE TYPES OF DOORS.
Death put one of his bones on the table.
"Is that your dick?!"
Two mannequins stood in the middle of the room. One was of a pegasus, the other a drake. The first a dress of light blue and the hem of a Rainbow, the second a suit with a purple blazer and a green vest, and a white dress shirt underneath the combo.
Spike fell against the door frame, panting at the sight. "What...what is this?"
From behind him, Rarity glared at the sight. She looked over her shoulder down the hall; a thought then struck her, one that made her grin and not hesitate to enter the room.
"This, if you must know, is the gift Rainbow had been preparing you." Rarity walked past him, flicking him with her tail and keeping her tone in contempt. "She'd come to me little ways after you started dating to commission an update on her dress as well as proper attire for your recent growth spurt. She intended to ask you to the Gala."
Spike looked on, blinking then looking down. A claw grabbed at his heart. "I...I see." He tried looking up at Rarity, but only lifted his head an inch. "And you helped her? Even after all that had happened?"
"Darling. Do you truly take me for a heartless mare?" Rarity tone held some emotion. "No matter what happens, you two are my friends, and it would be a crime against fashion itself to see you both go underwhelmed. Had you come out at that party with your relationship, I would have hated myself for not giving you two my all."
"I...I just can't believe she went out and did all this."
"Then it should be of equal disbelief that she asked for it all to be destroyed." Spike raised his head immediately, but all he saw was a stoic face. The world felt as if it were closing in on him. "Rainbow was heartbroken by your breakup, but after to coming to Pinkie and me, she decided to be done with you once and for all. The proof of that decision? Once I destroy my two creations."
"So...that's it, then? Rainbow is really done with me?"
"Afraid so." Rarity walked towards him. "The reason why I kept you out was to keep you away from the truth of the matter. I wish you would learn this sooner, Spike." She tried her hoof on his arm again. He didn't even flinch. "That caring about the wrong things can hurt you."
Spike did not have the strength to respond.
"Instead of wasting your efforts in caring for Dash, how about you care about what's right in front of you?" Rarity pulled away, backing to the mannequins. "These outfits don't have to perish, we could still use them. This dress would look great on me, wouldn't you agree?"
Spike looked on and knew his time of silence was over. This entire visit had been leading somewhere, and now he had been there, and the truth of the place wasn't pretty. He still longed for Rainbow, but she was better off without him, then maybe it was time to move on as well. He could do so, but he needed just one thing:
To be sure.
"You know what, Rarity?" Spike pushed himself off the door. He began going forward, his feet stumbling. "You're right. You would look dazzling in that dress."
"Oh?"
"With you mane done up and your lips the right shade of red, you'd look radiant in the moonlight." He came before her, holding a claw at his hip. "And, if I'm honest, your flank would fill out more at the back."
"My my," Rarity tittered, lightly hitting him with a hoof. "Where did you get that confidence from? Were it anyone else, I'd be offended, truly."
"Seeing myself in the suit," he said, staring at the clothes. "Dressed that nice with you at my side, who wouldn't be. Heck, maybe even put Rainbow and her new boy-toy to shame."
"Now that wasn't a comment I was expecting." Rarity batted her eyelashes and rested against the drake. "Heartbroken one second and jealous the next. You move on rather quick."
"Only because you were right," Spike said. "Caring about what went down isn't getting me anywhere—I have to move on and forward. If she thinks she can badmouth me after all the stunts she pulled, then she has another thing coming at the Gala."
"Darling, no new boyfriend could amount to having a dragon as one."
Dope
"True, but she'll be a Wonderbolt by this point." Spike brought his claw to his chin. "If she doesn't pick up a boyfriend today at the bar, then she may hook up with an another Wonderbolt." He looked back at Rarity. "You and I may be amazing, but those two will outrank us again. I'm not going to a Gala just to be outdone by my ex."
"But Spiky, think of how magical it'll be!"
"It'll hurt more than anything else." Spike turned around. "Sorry Rares, but I'll pass."
"It doesn't have to be a competition between us, just think of the implications of us just being there!" Rarity rested a hoof on his wrist, but he tore himself away. "The night would be romantic, our entrance drawing gasps from everypony there. There will be moonlight and dancing, and we could meet midnight with a kiss!"
"Sorry Rarity," Spike said in a tone of finality, "but I'm not going with Rainbow there. You'll just have to go it alone."
Rarity huffed, looked down in thought, then looked back up again. "What if I said if Rainbow wouldn't be there?"
Spike rolled his eyes. "Yeah right, Rainbow missing an event to show off."
"If you truly want to get back at Rainbow, then date me." That made Spike look at her. She was grinning. "Rainbow is still not fond of me and struggled to destroy these outfits. She may have gone to a bar afterward, but no new coltfriend could amount seeing your ex and his new marefriend dressed in your outfit."
"So you've finally come out with it."
"I've finally come out with what?"
Spike turned around, holding her chin up with a claw. "The Rarity I knew would get over herself so that her friends could be happy, but the one before me is willing to lie just to get revenge. You rejected me one moment, then wanted me the next."
"Did you...did you just play me!?"
"No worse than how you played on the guilt of my breakup." Spike slid his claw away and stepped back. "Let me tell you something Rarity, had this been weeks ago; I would have been jumping for joy at having you as my marefriend. But no matter how desperate I may become, I won't date a mare that's only doing to have what she was denied."
Rarity growled. "You're going to come to regret this, Spike.'
"Add to the list," Spike said, his back almost to the door. "My biggest regret is thinking what you said about Rainbow was right in the slightest. The truth is, I am a lazy dragon that could be so much more, and Rainbow isn't basing me on her expectations, she's raising me to the potential she sees inside me."
"That's still expecting more than what's presented."
"Maybe," Spike said, now at the doorway. "We should accept our lovers for who they are, but we should also let them change us for the better, as we do the same for them. No relationship can ever be perfect, even in your ideal one, but all relationships can make progress."
Rarity only stepped forward. "You're making a great mistake about this. Rainbow may be hung up on you, but I wasn't lying about the outfits, or her attempt at new love in some bar."
"The only mistake I've made is making Rainbow out to be the villain in this." Spike turned around. "For a while, I wondered even I loved her, if I was just excited to have a marefriend finally. But every morning, despite sleeping in and having ice-cream, I'm still unhappy. Do you know why?"
He wasn't expecting a response.
"It's because I don't get to tie my running shoes," he said, "that I don't get startled as soon as I leave my house by her active voice. That I don't get to see her smile as I run further than the day before. I may have been too scared to touch her, but whenever she scooted next to me on her own, no bed is more comfortable than the feel of her wings."
Spike shook his head. "No matter what, I can say this for sure." He looked over his shoulder. "I did love Rainbow Dash. I was just too much of a coward to show it, even to myself. She's everything I've ever wanted in a mare, the kind that makes me better and happy every-time I see her."
He looked forward, and with a great breathed, began ahead. "Rainbow can slap me, hit me, even kill me, but no matter what, she's getting that letter and my apology. I wasn't wrong to break up with her, but I was when I didn't say that I loved her."
Rarity was after him in a second. "You’re unsubtle, your cowardice will hurt others more than your carelessness ever did! You'd be better off as that drake again than the one that stumbles around and breaks things because of it!"
"I could be that Spike again," Spike said, never breaking his stride. "But it's in my choices, in facing what I fear, that makes me, me."
And just like that, he was down the stairs, and slightly after that, out the door. Rarity stood in place, anger boiling in her chest at the events that had transpired. "I...I refused to be beaten by that brute!" She shot her head back to the room they'd been in. "Desperate times calls for Desperate measures."
She giggled as she went back into the room, which turned into outright laughter as she floated a box from underneath her bed. "You've grown a backbone, Spiky, but that's something nature gave you: not something you had to work to earn. Let's see how your new confidence handles a cold hard truth?"
Rarity floated the necklace around her neck (big surprise) and moaned at the influx of power.
"Ready or not, Spikey-Wikey." Rarity turned around, green wisps floating from her eyes. "Like it or not, you'll be mine!"
IT'S OKAY. WE'LL PUT YOU AS MALE.
Spike wanted to cry.
C'MON NOW. MANY CREATURES HAVE CRIED IN THAT SHAME CHAIR, BUT IT WAS ALWAYS FOR BIGGER REASONS, LIKE THE LOSS OF THEIR LIVES.
Spike blinked, choking out his words. "This...this is exactly the same."
HOW SO?
"This is the loss of my masculinity."
IF ANYTHING. YOU SHOULD BE MORE COMFORTABLE ABOUT YOUR SEXUALITY. THE FACT YOU COULDN'T GET YOURS UP IN THE PRESENCE OF MINE SHOULD INDICATE YOUR ATTRACTIONS TO DRAGONESS, OR MARES. Death tilted his head in thought. YOU KNOW, I HAVEN'T ASKED WHY YOU FIND MARES ATTRACTIVE. ISN'T THAT BORDERLINE BEASTIALITY?
"Uh." Spike scratched his head. "Mares don't always glare at you as dragoness do, they're always more kind and have more character."
CHARACTER, EH? Death was once more glad he was grinning. IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE CALLING IT NOWADAYS?
"Fine!" Spike threw his claws up in the air. "I like furry butts over scaly ones, alright?!"
I DO NOT JUDGE CREATURES ON THEIR SEXUAL PREFERENCES, said Death, ONLY ON WHEN THEY'RE MEANT TO DIE. He leaned closer to Spike, raising a hand to the side of his mouth. AND, TO BE HONEST WITH YOU, BONY BEHINDS ARE THE BEST KIND.
"Speaking of bones," Spike said. "Why is yours so big anyway?"
I AM SEVEN FEET TALL, said Death. IT'S JUST A MATTER OF PROPORTIONS.
"Right." Spike sighed. "So, the absence of my thing popping out at your thing has removed any doubt of your mind of me not being male or attracted to my sex."
YES.
"So, if that's the case, can you get your thing of the table?"
YES.
Nothing happened for a moment.
"Will you be doing that soon or—"
YES.
Spike threw the door behind him as he walked out onto the street. He gazed down all the split-roads, trying to think of one that would take him to a bar. He faintly remembered catching wind of a pub on the outskirts of town, so going the way of the bridge would take him there.
He stopped before the stream of ponies, Their ceaseless movement making it difficult for him to join in. He sighed, looking up at the sky.
The sun was in its proper place; late afternoon was already here.
"Damn it!" Spike hissed under his breath, rubbing a claw against his nose. "Day's half-done and I'm not any closer to finding Rainbow. Why do I have to be so useless?!"
Spike clenched his eyes and held his breath. Berating himself was a habit Rainbow tried to break in him and for a good reason: it only wasted time, drained him of willpower, and didn't get him any closer to his goal.
He took a step forward.
"ZA WORLDO!"
The world froze. Well, it's not that the world itself had stopped. While the idea of Equestria being round or flat was still contested in many a court, it's safe to assume, that if it's the former, the planet (which has yet to be named, which is odd) was still spinning. There would be catastrophic results if the world had stopped spinning: there was a book written about it, and even a movie, so that made it true.
So instead of saying the world had froze, it was more like everything on the planet had froze. Ponies were still, birds suspended overhead, trees and flowers unmoving, though the effect of the spell had yet to be proven on plants.
Spike screamed, so that proved he wasn't frozen. He walked into the stream of ponies that previously gave him trouble, waving his claw in front of a stallion and gauging the response: there was none. He raised a brow, then the stallion's hoof, opening his mouth and sticking the hoof as far in as he could.
The stallion had his hoof in his mouth. This made Spike giggle.
"Turn around!" bellowed a voice from above. Spike did just that, finding its source atop the building. "And feast your eyes on the result of your crime!"
"But I already am!" Spike said, stepping forward. "And what is all this? How come everyone is frozen except you and me?"
Rarity struck out her chest. Spike shielded his eyes and respect, then realized she meant to show him something other than that. He feasted his eyes on her chest, blushing slightly, but seeing the amulet that hung on it. "Because of this!"
"The alicorn amulet?" Spike said, shaking his head and stepping forward, again. "Where in Equestria did you get that?"
"Stole it."
"Stole it?" he repeated. "From where."
"Irrelevant."
"Not really." Spike scratched the side of his head. "We've already had one antagonist abuse that power. Twilight would be furious if somepony abused that power to—oh okay I see I'm boned."
Rarity smiled. She began to sing.
"Come now, young one, and feast upon the priiiice of your criiime!" Rarity hopped down from the room to the second floor, strutting across a glass window. "A sin contrived by your reckless desiiire, your unsure heart puuumps me full of strange deeeelight!"
"Singing? Are you kidding me!" Spike threw his claw in the air. "Come now, Rarity, and knock this cruuuud ooooout!" He cursed under his breath. "Damn it, now you have me doing it tooooo! How could this get aaaaaany woooorse?"
"Why, with just a clap of course!" Rarity clapped her hooves, and just like that, the frozen ponies unfroze. 'Hoooope you're ready for my woooorst!"
A stallion knocked himself out by punching himself in his mouth. He also choked on the said hoof, and unwillingly swallowed dirt and grass, and more than likely would have died if the surroundings stallions didn't help a brother out.
"Come now, mares and stallions, and listen to my cuuurse!" A thin green wave shot out from Rarity, passing through all those nearby who were pushed back from the force. They shook their head, eyes closed, but when they opened again, a green wisp exuded from them all. "For revenge, no matter how sweet, cannot be completed alooooone!"
The stallions to the right of the building sang. "Oooh ho noooo!"
The mares to the left of the building sang. "Hooo oh noooo!"
"That right, now, everyone!" Rarity threw herself forward, stretching her hoof past the edge. "Get him now, the scaly one, yet to reap what he has sooown!"
"Wait, wait!" Spike held up his claws and began stepping back, both the mares and the stallions closing in on him. "Why am the only male singing like a maaaare?"
SHOULD I EVEN ASK?
"Please Celestia doooon't!"
THIS TALE IS GETTING RATHER FULL OF ABSURDITY.
"Oh honey, you haven't even seen it aaaall!"
Spike ran. He ran far away. A wave followed him from behind, and in the alleyways of the blurring buildings, he saw torrents of mares and stallions on either side. He couldn't help but cry at the sky above. "Please all, everyone, this is a pain I did not mean at aaaaall!"
"Tough luck, little wimp." Spike looked up to see three pegaus soaring above him, blanketing him in their shadow. They sang even as the ones on the side broke out of formation. "Meetings others always entaillls this priiiice!"
"Please understand, I was in love, but did not deserve the same in reeetuuuurrrrnnn!" Spike yelped as one of the pegasuses rocketed through an upcoming alley, hooves open to tackle him. He didn't have time to think, letting his body act, picking up the lid to a trash can and letting her take that instead. "I did what I did for the best of us all. She just took it the wroooong waaaaay!"
"Right way, wrong way, you're insane!" The pegasus had flown into a wall, rubbing her muzzle. "A broken heart, and a nose I might add, will pain us allll nooo matter whaaaat!"
Spike coughed as he pushed his legs harder. "I know, I know! I was a fool, alright! I knew not of what I was doing then, just as I'm doing now, why I'm afraid, why can't you all just understaaaand?"
"Understand? Understand!" At the end of the long alley, the second pegasus bolted towards him. He yelped but did not stop running. "Honey, you aren't the only one that’s scared, no pony lives without fear—despite being twisted in the head! The love of your life was just as scared; only she was brave enough to face it alll for yooou!"
"I know, I should have known!" Spike clenched his eyes and ran faster, trusting his heart instead of his mind. Then the moment felt right, and he slid on his knees. His eyes opened to an orange underbelly. "My insecurity racked my brain, my eyes could not see, the beauty that laid beeefooooreee meeee!"
"Excuses excuses!" The stallions on his tail began to catch up, almost literally on his tail. "You're a dragon, strong and proud, how could you be such a wimp about this allll?"
"I know, I know." Spike ran faster and faster, away from his problems. "Don't you see? I've made a mistake, but I'm trying to make it riiiight?"
"Right? Yeah, right!" The stallions were running alongside him now, four legs beating two. "Hand a letter like any mailpony. What's so special about this exxxchaaaange?"
"Because I'm done with my fears! My insecurities and self blaaame!" Spike outran them all, which shouldn't be possible, but then again, love triumphs logic. " All hogwash for my therapist later in the day. For now, boys and girls, it's time to tell this mare just what she means to meeee!"
The mares looked to the stallions and the stallions looked to the mares. They all looked to the drake, looking amazed.
"Why now."
"Scaly one!"
"Your voice."
"It has changed!"
"Changed, whatever do you mean?" Spike rubbed his claw against his throat, and despite not feeling anything different, was overcome with joy. "Hey now, everyone, you were right! I've had a character development after allll!"
The stallion and the mares all began to smile, the curse lifting from their eyes.
"Cheers now, everyone!" The stallions caught up to the drake, who slowed because he was no longer chased. Some even patted his shoulder. "Our boy has grown, not feet but in heart, for he finally understands what's been calling him all a aloooong!"
"A body made strong by birth, a tongue sharp by books, and heart made alive by its foolish pains." The mares swooped alongside himself, batting their manes and their tails, but the latter went unnoticed as the dragon stared ahead. "You are growing, living and becoming, just like your marefriend prophesized! Do you think, that's there's still a chance, she was riiiight?"
"Without a doubt, that much is for sure!" Spike finally exited the long alleyway, followed not by haters but supporters, marching in his stead. He began across town, spotting something by the town's fountain. "I see her now, everyone, that mare with the blue fur and rainbow mane. I finally found her, after such a straaaannnge daaaay!"
"Hooray!"
"Hooray!"
"Time to make things right, with this letter and love, so she hurts no more!" Spike didn't stop in his swagger, the marching ponies giving him some space to continue up ahead.
They sang up to him. "Do you think you'll get back together!"
"Maybe or maybe not!" Spike smiled back at them, keeping it as he looked forward. "That's for her to de—"
Rainbow kissed another stallion.
"—cide."
The stallions and the mares came to a full stop. There was a collective gasp.
"I...I don't get it." Spike stumbled back, letting the letter slip from his claw. "I thought I had done everything right?"
"ZA WORLDO!"
The world froze again, and this time, Spike wished he was frozen as well. The back of Rainbow's head was to him, bent forward as she took her lovers lips fully, unaware just how public her make-out session was.
"There? Are you quite satisfied?" Spike didn't want to, but he turned around, seeing Rarity atop a rooftop. "This is the truth I tried to save you from. Tell me, not that's you've seen it all, was it worth the priiice?"
Spike shook his head. "I just wanted to do good!"
"Yeah well, it happens to us all!" Rarity slid down the building before hopping down, strutting up to him an absolute delight. "We all make mistakes and well all pay the price. But worry not, young one, I will love you alwayyys!"
Spike turned around, looking at his previous love awash in bliss. Rarity teleported before him, bringing her lips to his, but he kept staring at was once his. She went in for the kill, but he moved his head, receiving a kiss on his cheek instead.
"All will be set, in just a little bit." Rarity picked up the letter, placing it inside her mane. "Your work here is done, doing the best that you could. Relax now, broken one, and let everything settle doooown!"
Rarity ignited her horn in a green glow, and before the drake could raise his claw, he was shot backward. The impact was strong and immediate, sending him flying across down, his back slamming against something hard but then landing on something soft. He looked around, surrounded by metal walls, and he soon realized where he was.
Spike reached out a claw, but the train doors were shut on him. It whistled and steamed, making its way around, a day-long trip in store for all those aboard. There was no point in fighting, for there were guards paid by Rarity's coin. He lost his love and his confidence, so it only made sense to wallow away, and let the world repair itself after his meddling.
This was Spike's defeat.