//------------------------------// // Part 8: Just Some Random Asshole // Story: Celestia's Chosen Hero... is Carl? // by Joey JoJo Shabadoo //------------------------------// “Welp… time for another shit day…” Carl wandered through the park, having just left Rarity’s house. He hoped the fresh air would help clear his head and it certainly had nothing to do with the plight of a particular pink pony. With no orders from Twilight or Celestia, he had nothing to do. All he really could do was sit around, waiting for time to pass by and hope that the mess he found himself in would eventually blow over. Those plans were soon dashed by the rainbow pony that landed right in front of him. She looked furious, but it was a calm fury, the most dangerous kind of fury. She stared at Carl for a moment, unsure of what to even say to him. “What the hell are you staring at?” Carl asked, irritated. There was no answer. “You got a problem, or are you just here to waste my time?” “Yeah… I got a big problem. I’m staring at it, right now.” “Well, have fun with that.” Carl passed by Rainbow Dash, as she kept her eyes locked onto him as he walked around her. He glanced back at her for moment, making eye-contact and then, he did the unthinkable... he left. Without even saying a word, he ignored her completely. Dash was understandably upset. “Hey!” She called. “You can’t just walk away like that!” But, he kept walking, forcing Dash to sprint ahead and block his path. “What the hell do you want from me!?” Carl asked, growing impatient. “I…. I thought you were cool, Carl!” Dash cried, suddenly getting emotional. “Fucking what!?” Carl was legitimately surprised, he was expecting a fight, not a loss of admiration he wasn't even aware existed. “Where is this shit coming from!?” “I thought Twilight just exaggerated all that stuff about you, but I guess she was right. I can’t believe I tried to defend you! I was so stupid!” “Wha-? Hold on, I think we skipped a few pages here! How is this my problem!?” “Because I thought you were cool! But then you… How could you do that to Pinkie!?” “Will you calm your tits, lady! I barely know you! We've hardly spoken to each other! I can’t even remember your name! Why are you crying over me!?” “We didn’t need to speak. I understood you from the way you acted. When that Lightning Ball went haywire, everypony was freaking out, but you were strong, resilient and brave! You got the job done when nopony else could! I could totally see why the Princess chose you! You were just…. cool, you know?” Carl was dumbfounded, he was the last person he would ever consider ‘cool’. “Lady, the only reason I did that shit was because I was losing my patience, while everyone else was acting retarded. If I succeeded, cool, if I failed, whatever.” “But, that’s what made it cool. You just did it… and now you've gone and made Pinkie all depressed. I guess you ‘just did’ that, too.” “Who the hell do you think I am!? Some kind of hero!?” “Well… I don’t know…” “The answer's: No, I'm not.” With that final thought, Carl took his leave, but Dash wasn’t finished yet and called out to him one last time. “Could you at least go apologise to her or something!?” “She’ll get over it.” Carl replied and continued to leave, he wasn’t in the mood to make any further comments. “But, what if she doesn’t?” To Dash's dismay, Carl was already too far away, he couldn't hear her and she was left alone in the park. Carl trekked through Ponyville, until he reached town hall. It was a large, imposing building compared to the small houses and tents that surrounded it, but Carl didn't care. The only reason he was here was for the tables and benches that were scattered around. He just wanted somewhere to sit down. He slumped onto the bench and leaned into his arms as they rested on the table. A peculiar pose for a pony, but for a human, it was a clear sign of a tired and defeated man. He still didn’t know what to do. In fact, he didn’t feel like doing anything. He just wanted to go home. Of course, that wasn’t happening any time soon. “Hey, is this the guy?” Asked an orange, pegasus filly. “Yeah, he’s the one I saw sleeping in Rarity’s house.” Answered the white unicorn filly. “What’s with his Cutie Mark? It’s just a black smudge.” Added the yellow, earth filly. The pegasus climbed next to Carl to get a closer look, while the unicorn jumped up on the table to check if he was even awake. Carl continued to sit with his head down, hoping the children would lose interest and leave him alone, but they soon started poking him in his side, trying to get a reaction out of him. They were genuinely curious about his odd Cutie Mark. Carl lifted his head and politely asked: “What the fuck are you little shits doing?” “Sorry, we didn’t mean to disturb you.” The white filly responded. “Hey, do you remember me?” “You’re the brat from earlier.” "Brat!?" The filly pouted, viciously. "Yeah and who the hell are these other brats?" The tiny unicorn decided to let the insult slide, just this once. “I’m Sweetie Belle. The orange filly is Scootaloo and the other one is Applebloom.” “I take it you're friends?” “Yeah!” “Cool, now get lost.” “Hey, don’t be like that.” Scootaloo asked, putting on a sweet face. “Yeah.” Applebloom added. “We just wanna know about your Cutie Mark.” She pointed to the black smudge on Carl’s rear. “This thing? I got it in an accident.” “What accident?” Applebloom asked. “Were you cooking with your butt?” Added Scootaloo. “Do you have a butt cooking Cutie Mark?” Sweetie asked, excitedly. “What? No. Would you fuck off?” Carl’s resistance only made Sweetie Belle's interest harder. “Aw… but every Cutie Mark has a story behind it. Tell us, please?” “What’s so cute about it? It’s just a smudge.” “What?” Scootaloo questioned. “Are you half asleep, we’re talking about actual Cutie Marks here.” “What the fuck is a Cutie Mark?” The fillies gasped, shocked by this sudden revelation. “How could a grown up pony not know what a Cutie Mark is?” Sweetie Belle asked. “Maybe he hit his head?” Applebloom proposed. “Maybe he has amnesia!” Scootaloo added. “Or maybe, you kids should go bug someone who cares.” Carl berated. “Maybe he doesn’t have any special talents.” Sweetie Belle realised, ignoring Carl’s remarks. “Oh no!” Applebloom was shocked by the very thought. “You mean that black smudge isn’t a Cutie Mark at all?” “Quick, check the other side!” Scootaloo quickly ran to Carl’s opposite side. It was just as they feared, there was no mark. “It’s blank!” She yelled, in horror. Carl’s patience was wearing thin and he hardly had any to begin with. “Congratulations, detective. You figured it out. Can you leave me alone, now!?” “No way!” Applebloom protested. “We can’t let you live your life with no Cutie Mark! As Cutie Mark Crusaders, it’s our duty to help ponies of all ages find their special talent and get their Cutie Marks!” Carl was completely lost as to what the little filly was even talking about. “Kid, I think you're the one who hit their head.” “Alright, let's get to work! We got Cutie Marks to crusade for!” The fillies tugged on Carl’s legs and arm, urging him to get off his butt and let them help him. “Let go of me! I don’t want a fucking Cutie whatever!” Just then, Sweetie Belle got an idea. “I know how to get him up.” She focused her magic on the bench he was sitting on, but it suddenly snapped in half, causing Carl to fall through and land on his rear. “Sweetie Belle!” Scootaloo yelled. “What was that!?” “Oops. I meant to move it, not break it...” “That’s it.” Being forced to fall on his butt was the last straw. Carl was mad. He rose from the ground as his tall, imposing figure intimidated the little fillies. “I think he's upset.” Sweetie noticed. “What do we do now?” Applebloom asked. Scootaloo answered with a loud: “Cheese it!” The Cutie Mark Crusaders ran into town, with Carl following after them in a rage. “Get back here, you little shits!” He chased them through town, but for little shits, they were pretty fast. He could hear them giggling to themselves as he chased them, they were clearly having fun with him. If he were in a better mood he’d probably be amused by their mischievous behaviour, but right now, he wanted to let off some steam and this chase was the perfect excuse to do so. The group eventually ran into the market, where they bumped into a stall, scattering the apples on sale, all over the ground. “What in tarnation!?” The apple seller cried. “O-oh, hey, Applejack.” Applebloom nervously greeted, as she and her friends climbed out of the barrel of apples they had just careened into. “Applebloom, what the heck are you doing!?” “Found you!” Carl finally caught up with the troublemakers, huffing and wheezing from having just sprinted across town. “Now…. you’re…. gonna be…. sorry….” Applejack quickly figured out what trouble her sister was causing. “Applebloom. Were you and your friends bothering this stallion?” “We were only playing, I swear!” “Well, your ‘playing’ just cost us some precious apples. Now, go pick them up, before they go rotten and apologise to that pony.” “Okay, sis….” “Ha. Applebloom’s in trouble.” Scootaloo taunted. “That goes for you two, as well. Come on, get to it.” Applejack quickly retorted. The three fillies turned to Carl with their big puppy dog eyes and apologised in unison. Carl wasn’t sure what to say, he was more used to being the provocateur, rather than the provoked. “Uh… good… don’t do it again, I guess...” The fillies scavenged around, looking for any apples that could still be salvaged from the spillage. “Man…” Carl sighed. “At least someone around here acts like a responsible adult.” “Yeah…” Applejack replied, coldly, which Carl immediately picked up on. “What? Do I smell?” “You know, kids ain’t the only ones who are taught to apologise when they do something wrong. Sometimes adults need to be reminded, as well.” “What? Is this about the apples? Because, those kids did that, don’t start pointing fingers at me….” “That’s not what I’m talking about, Carl.” He wasn't sure how this pony knew his name, but he sensed a disturbance and decided to play it safe. “Carl…? No idea who you’re talking about.” “Don’t think you can pull a fast one over me, just because I’m a country gal.” “I don’t know who this Carl is. My name is Fence Kicker.” "That's funny, Fence Kicker was just here a few minutes ago, buying apples." "FU-..." Carl stumbled, but quickly pulled himself back together. "Oh, really. I guess we must share the same name. Weird coincidence, right?" “Nice try, but just a second ago, you said ‘pointing fingers’ instead of ‘pointing hooves’.” Carl’s facade was immediately shattered by Applejack’s surprisingly attentive ears. “Fucking…. goddammit… who the hell are you?” “I’m Applejack. We already met at Fluttershy’s cottage.” Carl scratched his head, which was a little awkward with hooves. “I don’t recall…” “What? It was only yesterday, I kicked you, remember?” “Oh, yeah… sorry, you kind of faded into the background during that whole scene…. kinda forgot you were there. So, what? Did Princess Pringles send you after me?” “Pring-what? If you mean Twilight, we can talk about her another time. For now though, you’ve got something much more important that needs tending to.” “What? You can’t order me around, you’re not my boss. I don’t have to do shit. In fact, fuck this shit, I’m outta here.” Carl attempted to leave, but was caught by a lasso that suddenly slipped around his waist. He looked over to find Applejack holding the rope tightly in her mouth. “Oh, come on. You really think a little rope is going to stop me?” He continued marching forward, but had great difficulty in breaking out of Applejack’s grasp, all he accomplished was tightening the rope’s grip around his waist, making it harder for him to breathe. “What…. the fuck… lady?” Carl pushed as hard as he could, but eventually ran out of breath and collapsed. This was Applejack’s chance, she quickly rolled Carl over and tied his legs up like a freshly caught, wild animal. “Phew…” She sighed. “Your as strong as you look, that’s for sure. I nearly lost my grip.” “Oh, this is some bullshit...” Carl grumbled, while struggling, but failing to break free from the cowgirl’s lasso. “You’re coming with me.” Applejack tied the other end of the rope to her tail. “Applebloom, could you watch over the stall for me? I’ve got a friendship problem that needs tending to.” “You got it, sis!” The filly saluted. As Applejack dragged Carl across town, he looked back to see the little filly sticking her tongue out, playfully mocking him. “Little punk.” He muttered. As Applejack dragged Carl across town, it wasn't long before he mustered up the energy to start yelling, again. “Hey, Apples! You going to explain this shit, or what!?” "Ain't it obvious?" "No." “You’re gonna apologise!” “For what!? To who!?” “To Pinkie Pie, obviously!” “What!? Fuck you! I’m not apologising for nothing!” “I figured you’d say something like that. That’s why I brought the rope.” “So, you could kidnap me!?” “Call it what you want, but I ain’t letting go of you, until you apologise!” “Well, I ‘ain’t’ doing shit!” “That foul-mouth of yours may ruffle the other pony’s feathers, but it won’t work on me. My sassy little sister ain’t afraid to give me lip and she can put up a way better fight than you.” “Kinda hard to fight when you’re tied up with rope.” “If you’re tied up with rope, then you’ve already lost. Now, quit complaining and think about how you’re going to apologise.” “The only thing I’m gonna be thinking about is kicking your ass, the moment you untie me!” Applejack laughed at the idea. “Yeah, good luck with that!” Despite his constant fidgeting and yelling, Applejack managed to drag Carl all the way to Sugarcube Corner, onlookers be damned. She kicked open the door, surprising Mrs. Cake, who was working the counter. “Oh my, what’s with all the ruckus, Applejack?” “Got a special delivery for you.” Applejack heaved Carl into the shop and untied him. His back ached from having it grazed across the ground. He thought about making a dash for the exit, but Applejack was already blocking the door. “Hey, Apples. Remember the part where I said I’d kick your ass?” “You picking a fight boy?” "Hey, I guess you really aren't a dumb country girl, after all." "Don't make me buck you into next week, Sunshine." Mrs. Cake wasn’t sure what was going on, but she was not going to allow violence in her store and immediately broke them up. “Nopony is picking a fight with anypony!” She warned. “Applejack, just who is this stallion?” “Oh, don’t mind him, he’s just here to see Pinkie Pie, aren’t you, Carl?” “Well, I am now, jackass…” “Pinkie?” Mrs. Cake questioned. “Are you sure? She’s not really in the mood for visitors right now. Maybe you should introduce your friend some other time.” “Now’s the perfect time! Carl’s got something special for her.” “Special? But I don’t see any gifts.” “It ain’t a gift you can wrap, if you get what I'm saying.” “Oh….? Oh!” A red hue brightened up Mrs. Cake’s face. “I see, now. How very sweet of him.” Carl’s violent anger quickly subsided as he suddenly felt extremely awkward, with a cold sweat running down his neck. “I don’t like those implications…” “She’s upstairs in her room, but, please, be gentle with her, okay?” “What the hell kind of visit do you think I’m here for?” Applejack was oblivious to the tension in the room. She was far more focused on forcing Carl to take responsibility for the mess he made. “Right… Come on, big guy. Time to march up those stairs like a man and show Pinkie what you’re made of!” “Uh… maybe later…” Carl attempted to back out, but Applejack’s lasso said otherwise. “Don’t make me drag you up those stairs, boy. Because, I’ll do it.” Carl sighed, giving in to Applejack’s demands as she escorted him up the stairs. “Ah…. I remember when Carrot Cake used to bring me special gifts.” Mrs. Cake reminisced, much to Carl’s discomfort. They climbed the stairs towards Pinkie’s room. Once they arrived outside her door, Applejack gave Carl a moment to prepare himself. “Now, don’t feel too nervous, just go in, say you sorry and everything will be fine. Pinkie’s not the type of girl to hold a grudge… I think.” “Let’s just get this over with.” Carl braced himself, despite every fibre of his being begging him to bail, he busted open the door, bursting into the room. There was already a couple of ponies in the room, sitting on the bed. Near the bottom was Rainbow Dash, on the pillow was Fluttershy, but sitting by the window, staring into the world outside, was a greyish pony with a long mane, that was straight as a board. Carl didn’t recognise her at first, but then he remembered… The blue pony was Rainbow Dash. He drew a blank on who the greyish pony was, though. “Hey.” He called, announcing his presence. “Where’s Pinkie?” “Carl.” Fluttershy sighed with relief as she hopped off the bed along with Rainbow Dash to greet him. “See, Dash. I knew he’d come, eventually.” “Yeah… and all it took was a little ‘convincing’ from Applejack.” She chuckled as she pointed to the rope still wrapped around Carl’s waist. “Yeah, yuck it up. So, where is she? I need to talk to her.” “She’s sitting just over there.” “What?” Carl looked over at the greyish pony sitting by the window, but he still couldn’t make out who they were. “That’s not Pinkie, Pinkie’s… well, pink.” “What are you, blind? Of course, that’s Pinkie.” Carl walked over to the saddened pony, to examine them more closely. Upon closer inspection, their grey coat did have a pinkish hue to it, same with their mane, but the clincher was that she had the same big blue eyes. He could never forget the way they stared directly into his soul, after she tackled him to the ground, yesterday. Although, today they were more fixated on staring into empty space. “Jesus, Pinkie…” Carl cringed. “I know you’re sad, but you didn’t have to goth yourself up like this. It's a bit much, don't you think?” There was no response, not even an acknowledgement of Carl’s presence. “Hey, are you ignoring me?” He waved his arm in front of her face, but still got nothing. “Hey, stupid!” He yelled, only to receive more nothing. “Aw, fuck it. I tried.” Carl gave up and attempted to leave, but Applejack blocked the way, again. “That wasn’t much of an apology.” “No point in apologising if she’s not listening.” “Maybe, she’ll start listening if you start apologising.” “Or maybe, she’s just not interested.” “Well, calling her ‘stupid’ ain’t exactly the best way to grab her interest.” “But, she is stupid. Getting all sad, because someone yelled at her? Oh, what a fucking tragedy…” “Don’t get all sarcastic on me. Why is it so hard for you to just say, you’re sorry.” “Because it doesn't mean anything! Look at her! She’s just sitting there, like a depressed lump, even though she lives in a cupcake above a bakery, is surrounded by friends who are willing to drop everything just to support her and she got a free scarf, that was made by another one of her friends! What the fuck does she have to be depressed about!?” “Carl.” Fluttershy interrupted. “Just because Pinkie has all those things doesn’t mean she doesn't get sad. Especially when the cause is something a lot more… um… personal.” “You’re talking about me, right?” “If I was, I know that the best thing that you could do is, maybe... apologise... maybe...?” “No way. There’s no reason for her to be this sad. I say we just let her wallow in her own misery until she gets over it.” “But, you haven’t even tried.” Dash argued. “Look, I’ve seen Pinkie like this before and she was pretty unhinged, but this time, she’s just completely shutdown and that’s not normal. You did this to her, the least you could do is try to help.” “Are you blind and stupid!? I went right up to her face and she didn’t even look at me! I tried talking to her and I didn’t even get a reaction! She’s not interested in my help and I’m not interested in giving her my help! God, you know, none of this shit would have happened if she had just left me alone in the first place...” Rainbow Dash was about to raise an objection when there was a sudden loud thump. Pinkie suddenly moved. The other ponies watched quietly as Pinkie walked over to Carl, as if she had just been struck by some sort of epiphany. She looked Carl right in the eye, before bending down and exclaiming: “I’m so sorry, Carl.” “WHAT!?” Her friends yelled in unison. Even Carl was confused, speechless even. This came so far out of left field, it was from a completely different ball game. “Please, just hear me out!” She begged. “Wha-? I-” “It’s just, you helped me finally figure something out. I just can’t believe it took me this long.” “Wha…? Pinkie, you need to slow this crazy train down, because I have no idea where the fuck it’s headed.” Pinkie took a deep breath. She had spent the past twelve hours or so, thinking long and hard about her relationship to Carl and how it all went horribly wrong and so, she had a lot to get off her chest. “See, when I first met you, you looked so sad and lonely, even though you were with Twilight, who's super nice and friendly. I thought you just needed some cheering up, that you just needed somepony to make you laugh, to help break the ice, but you weren’t like that at all. You were cold and distant and mean. You acted like an overconfident, arrogant jerk, so much so, that even Twilight couldn’t stand you. But I wasn’t about to give up on you, because I know a fake smile when I see one. Making you smile became my top priority and I mean a real smile, from real joy, but no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t find a way to connect with you. Everything I tried just pushed you further and further away. You only took part in activities because you had to, not because you wanted to and that’s no way to have fun. I didn’t understand. How can somepony be so sad and yet, be so unwilling to make friends, especially when they’re all alone in a different world? But, after doing a lot of thinking, I think I finally figured it out. Carl, you don’t actually like being the center of attention. You act cocky, but you really just want to be left alone, to enjoy life at your own pace. The last thing you want is some hyper pony pushing you around, trying to get you to do things you don’t want to do. You kind of remind me of Cranky, I just didn’t notice it at the time, since you were so much more willing to humour me than he was. I’m sorry…” The room fell silent, as Pinkie’s friends were left dumbfounded by her sudden maturity. It seemed it was up to Carl to finally break that silence. “You really are an idiot.” He scolded. “You really think you got me figured out, don’t you? Do you even know who the hell I am?” “No.” Pinkie answered, meekly. “Exactly, I’m nobody. Just another random asshole." Pinkie was a little shocked. She was expecting Carl to hurl insults at her, not himself. "What the hell are you doing cooped up in your room, like a depressed teenager? How can you get so sad over some random asshole, who doesn’t like you, especially when these assholes already like you?” Carl directed Pinkie’s attention to her friends, who weren’t particularly keen on being labelled assholes. “How can you get so offended over what some random asshole has to say? Since when did people start evaluating their own self-worth by what some random assholes think of them? Who cares? There are so many other people out there who are more worth your time and who are willing to let you be worth their time. Take it from someone with experience, there's always going to be people in the world who don't like you, you can't please everyone and if you lock yourself away in this room, you won't please anyone, not even yourself. You have friends, Pinkie, real friends. Don't lose sight of them, or you might lose them forever… you idiot.” The ponies were stunned. They never imagined Carl was capable of saying anything even remotely encouraging to Pinkie, even if he did say it in his own special way. Pinkie started giggling to herself. “Aww, that’s the kind of friendship lesson I’d expect from somepony like Twilight or even the Princess. You really do have a nice side, buried underneath all that cynicism.” “Oh, really?” Carl quickly retorted. “Well, don't get too attached to it, because I’m never saying that shit, again. I shouldn't have to give a friendship speech to an adult, you should know better, besides they sound fucking gay. The next time you fall into your little depression hole, you can crawl back out of it yourself.” “Okie dokie.” “What the hell are you smiling at, now?” “I don’t know, I just feel like smiling.” “Well, you’re definitely back to normal. Guess that means I can finally get out of here.” The others may not have seen it, as they were standing behind him, but as Carl turned around, for a brief moment, Pinkie caught a glimpse of a real genuine smile. Although, it faded as quickly as it appeared as Applejack was still blocking the door. “Goddammit, will you move, already!?” Carl cried. “I know a lot of complicated stuff just happened between you two, and Pinkie certainly looks a lot cheerier, but there’s still one more thing you have left to do.” “What more could there possibly be!?” “Apologise.” “What!? Are you still going on about that!? God damn, you are one stubborn horse!” “Boy, I’m practically the definition of stubborn.” She swiveled Carl back around to face Pinkie, who eagerly awaited his response, but Carl was still trying to figure out a way to weasel out of the situation. “What the hell do I have to apologise for?” “Well….” Fluttershy replied. “You did treat her pretty badly, called her names, ruined her bowling game and then you sent her into a spiraling depression.” “But, she was so annoying…” “Geez.” Dash added. “I could say the same thing about you, just apologise already.” “But, I… she’s just….” “Just do it!” Applejack ordered. Carl turned back to face Pinkie, with her big blue eyes and heartwarming smile. The more he tried to fight it, the more painful it became, there was only one way of escaping this nightmare and it was with his pride in shambles. He took in a deep breath, lowered his head and bluntly stated. “I’m sorry.” Pinkie’s mane immediately popped back into it’s frizzy, wild state as her coat returned to it’s bright, bubblegum pink, luster. She latched onto Carl for a big hug. “I knew it! I knew you cared!” Carl wanted nothing more than to tell her to ‘shut up’, but he had already conceded to swallowing his pride just a moment ago. There was no point in whining about it now, instead he simply let her enjoy the moment. It was a painful struggle, but the rest of Pinkie’s friends were glad to finally see Carl take some responsibility for his actions, at least, just this once. Pinkie eventually released Carl from her grasp, but something was still choking him. Carl’s neck started feeling itchy, too. He felt around his neck and found a pink scarf, snuggly tied around him. “What is this?” “It’s the scarf Fluttershy got for me. I want you to have it, you know, as a sign of our friendship.” The scarf was a bright pink, something he normally wouldn’t be caught dead wearing, but considering it was from Pinkie, he didn't have much of a choice. Dash stifled a laugh. “It looks good on you.” Carl chose to ignore her comment. “Hey, I know what we can do!” Pinkie suddenly declared. “Let’s go see Twilight! We can show her that everything‘s all better between us, now!” “I guess?” Carl wasn’t sure Twilight was going to forgive him that easily, but Pinkie seemed pretty determined about it, so he decided to go along with her. The ponies headed back down stairs, Mrs.Cake was glad to see Pinkie was back to her old self again and as they exited the bakery, Rarity was already outside. “I’m sorry I couldn’t come sooner, I just finished work.” “That’s okay, Rarity.” Pinkie assured. “Everything’s fine and dandy, now. We’re gonna go see Twilight, you coming?” “Oh, well, yes, of course. Thank goodness everything turned out alright.” Even though her friends all seemed happy, Rarity couldn’t help but be distracted by Carl’s pink scarf. It clashed horribly with his rough, frowzy look. Carl, surrounded by Twilight’s friends, headed towards the Castle of Friendship. He barely knew these girls, but he somehow developed an odd sense of attachment and respect towards them that he couldn't quite explain. Whatever it was, he couldn’t wait to rub it in Twilight’s face. It seemed, however, before he could get to her, there was still one final obstacle blocking his path. “Hey!” Pinkie asked. “Who’s that pony standing outside Twilight’s Castle?” “That’s odd.” Rarity pondered. “He looks like a guard, but I don’t recall Twilight ever hiring any guards.” As they got closer, Carl was able to get a better look at this mysterious new guard. “Oh, goddammit. It’s that fucker, Unis.”