Conveniences and Stewing Brawls
Don sat in English class slowly losing his concentration to the lecture. His eyelids grew heavy and was about to fall asleep when a whisper brought him back to reality.
“Don,” Derpy whispered, “I’m bored.”
“Try listening to the lecture, and then fill me in about it later.” He whispered back.
Another voice quickly interrupted their banter, “Is there something you would like to add to the discussion Mr. Lacson?”
Don visibly flinched at the question. “Um, no?”
“Then please refrain from making any more comments then. “
Don quickly brought up his book, and hunkered down in his seat a bit. He was thankful that he sat in the back corner of the class since it provided some sort of privacy combined with the fact that most of the other students sat away from his general vicinity which made conversation with Derpy less noticeable, save for the volume.
He pushed the pen into her hooves, “Draw.” He said.
“Draw what?” Derpy asked.
“I dunno, some…trees and some flowers from your world?”
“Mr. Lacson,” the professor called out again, “What was that you just said?”
He panicked for a brief moment before rallying his thoughts together, “Um, I said… On three, I’ve been stuck on number three for a few hours?” He said giving a sheepish grin.
“We haven’t gotten there yet, but apparently you’ve been reading ahead, good for you.” The professor said.
He gave a sigh of relief. “I can’t believe that worked, and it’s probably my only luck out for today, from here on out I’m on my own. Thanks fates, you really know how to stick it to me.”
He continued to listen on for the duration of the class and avoided eye contact with the professor whenever questions were asked. If there was one rule he was sure about, it’s never make eye contact with a teacher when a question was asked. It was like they could smell and sense the inability to answer and it was some kind of sick fun they like to have while asking the unsure.
“Mr. Lacson, could you tell us what’s wrong with number three then since you’ve been reading ahead?” the professor asked.
“Oh c’mon! I didn’t make eye contact! I followed the code! This is what I get for lucking out earlier.”
“What a twist…”
He looked up at the professor and looked back at his book. “Um, number three?” he stuttered.
“Yes.”
Don looked at the problem for a full fifteen seconds before deciding he had no idea what the answer was and now he felt as if he was put on center stage for all the world to see his ineptitude.
Derpy looked up from her drawing session and saw the human struggling. It was a full thirty seconds of silence before the professor spoke up again.
“Do you know the answer or not?”
She looked at Don and saw the defeat in his eyes before she heard him speak.
“No…” he said while sinking in his chair a bit.
Derpy set down the pen and looked around the classroom and saw the stares from other classmates, some sympathetic, most disapproving, and some not caring at all. She knew exactly how Don felt right now as she was suddenly reminded of all the times when other ponies would give her those same looks of disapproval when she couldn’t do something right.
She moved to where his hand rested and put her hoof on it. He looked down and was met with a reassuring smile. As odd as it was due to the way her eyes were, it still held a lot of value. In that gesture alone, he could see her saying “It’s okay, you tried your best.” He gave a small smile and a very soft “Thanks.”
There was a sudden feeling of guilt for Don considering that he knew full and well he didn’t try at all. He knew it was his fault for not paying attention, but the way Derpy had just leveled with him said a lot about who she was. Sure, she was clumsy, but she was very sympathetic and supportive. Maybe he could give more effort, if not for his own sake but for hers too.
Class trudged on without any incidents before being dismissed. Don quickly put away his things and motioned to Derpy to follow him with his head. She obeyed and flew after him and landed on his unburdened shoulder and proceeded to let him do the traveling for her.Eventually they reached the parking lot and looked over the large area fill with rows upon rows of odd looking vehicles.
“What are these?” Derpy asked, flying over to a car.
He raised an eyebrow, “You’ve never seen a car before? Just how exactly do you get around where you’re from?”
She landed on the trunk of a car they were nearest to, “A pegasus like myself will usually fly if it’s not too far where we’re going, and unicorns and earth ponies usually walk or take carriages.If it’s somewhere really really far away, we’ll take a train.”
He mulled the information over, “Horses riding horse-drawn carriages, redundancy at it’s finest.”
His thoughts were interrupted by his phone ringing, “Hello? Hey Mom…yeah….okay….Sure, I can get that on my way home. Alright… see you later, bye.”
“What was that?” Derpy asked while eyeing a curious little black box he put back in his pocket.
“What was what?”
“That!” She said pointing at his pocket.
“Oh this?” He asked bringing out his phone again, “It’s my cellphone. You know, the thing I put near you every night so I don’t roll over and squash you?”
She only looked at it more intently. “Well, I know that, but you never explained WHAT it does.”
“Seriously? You don’t have anything like this back where you’re from?” He asked.
She thought for a moment, “No, I’ve never seen anything like that before.”
“Simply put, it lets me talk to others instantly over large distances. It’s a lot faster than waiting to meet somebody or for the mail.” He said.
She nodded thinking about what Don had just told her. “Huh, kinda sounds like when Spike sends a message with his fire-breath. So, what was that conversation about?”
“Oh, my mom wants me to pick up strawberries at the store since they keep disappearing somewhere.” He said in an accusing tone. “…wait, what do you mean fire-breath?”
“And they were delicious!” she said completely ignoring his question.
He sighed, “So yeah, we’ll be heading to the store…”he was cut off by a gasp from Derpy.
“A store?! Do they have muffins?! I hope they have muffins!” she said with a hopeful and excited smile.
He stood there with a slightly exasperated face, “Yes they have muffins but-“
“Oh my gosh! They have muffins! Can we get one? Can we? Can we?” She said while jumping up and down.
The pressure from her jumping was just enough to set off the car’s alarm. With a scream, she jumped and latched onto Don’s arm. He shook his head at the display.
“What did we learn today?” he asked.
“That cars are scary…”
-
The car ride home was more bearable now that Don had someone to talk to, in fact, he welcomed the change with open arms. He began to question why he didn’t just up and let her come with him the in the first place, consequences be damned. There was a moment of silence before he spoke up.
“You know, you don’t have to sit there on the passenger’s seat,” he said, “You wanted to see what my world was like, well, now you can.”
She flew up to the dashboard and stared in awe at the sight before her; there were hundreds of cards zooming about and buildings as far as she could see.
“Wow, I’ve never seen anything like this before.” She said.
He raised an eyebrow, “Really? You’ve never seen a giant city before?” he asked.
“Well, we have big cities like Manehatten, but not with all these…what do you call them…cars?” she finished still taking in the scenery.
“Yeah, that’s how people get around for the most part, not very many of us walk anymore, except for short distances, or rarely even that. As for long distances we take cars, or we fly and sometimes trains.”
This made Derpy more attentive and faced him. “Fly? How do you fly?” she asked.
“Well, I’ll have to answer that later, right now, we’re here.” He said.
She turned her gaze out the windshield again. It was another parking lot full of cars, however, there were people pushing carts and milling in and out like a beehive or an anthill. Before she realized it, they had already parked and heard the door open.
“Well, you coming or what?” he asked.
She flew up and perched herself on his shoulder again before going inside. As they entered there was a gust of wind that ruffled her mane. She was about to question where it came from when she noticed the numerous shelves lined with all sorts of food stuff, and various other items from one end of the building to the other.
“Wow,” she said, “there’s so much…stuff.” She said while looking around.
“Yeah, everything you need and more all in one location, and in this town, there’s two more stores just like it.” He said flatly.
“Two more?!” Where do you get all this stuff from?” She asked while taking flight to observe the area better.
“Everywhere really, food processing plants, farms, and dairy farms. Y’know, places like that.”
As the two walked towards the produce section, they stopped at the bakery to look at the various cakes that had been put on display along with all the other sweets set out to be purchased. Derpy, however, insisted that there was no better places to get sweets than Sugar Cube Corner. Wherever that was. After some time, they arrived at their destination.
“Hmm, no wonder…” She said to herself.
“No wonder what?” He asked.
“Oh, the reason the fruit here isn’t as sweet as back home.” she said still eyeing all the different produce.
“And what reason would that be?” He asked inspecting a box of strawberries.
“Oh well, its kind of simple really,” she said hovering in front of Don, “Since there’s so much demand from all these people, the farmers rush to grow their crops in anyway they can, and in turn this makes the quality of their products go down.”
He had a blank look on his face, “What?” he asked.
“So that’s why you should support your local farmers, and muffins!” she said.
He shook his head, “Donavan Lacson, you just got schooled by a three-inch tall pegasus, how does that make you feel?”
“It feels terrible Bob, I’m about ready to crawl under a rock right about now.”
Derpy’s attention shifted to a stack of cans not too far away and quickly zipped to the tower of aluminum. He noticed and headed over to where she was hovering.
“C’mon, you should know what soup is, tomato by the looks of it. Also, you should watch out or-“
His sentence was interrupted by the sound of aluminum cans falling to the floor. He could only wince at what was happening. He looked at Derpy who was holding onto one can where the center used to be.
“Oops, my bad.”
He face-palmed and suddenly looked around only to be met with the gazes of other shoppers. He stood there for a second wondering what to do. Another full three seconds passed before he bent down and picked up a can.
“What? Three for five dollars?!” he then scooped up an arm full and ran off with Derpy in tow. The other shoppers only looked on as they saw a young man run off with cans of soup before one of them spoke up;
“Three for five?! Shoot, I’m taking all I can get!” as they moved in on the scattered cans.
“Not before me lady!” someone else said. Before long there was a mad grab for soup which eventually turned into free for all.
Don sighed as he set the cans down in another aisle. “That was way to close.” He looked back as he heard footsteps running passed them only to see several security guards running towards where he came from. He quickly turned when he heard Derpy gasp,
“Derpy, what’s- oh no.”
Before him lay the snack aisle, with Derpy hovering where the muffins were. She had the most excited face at the sheer grandeur of all the different type and brands of muffins.
“It’s…beautiful…” she whispered to herself.
He could’ve sworn he heard a sniffle and saw a tear run down her face but he quickly dismissed that. “Derpy, c’mon, we gotta go.”
No response.
“Hello?” he said waving a hand in front of her face.
“Huh? Oh, hey Don, when did you get here?”
He shook his head, “I said we need to go.” He reiterated.
“What? Why?”
“We got what we came for so it’s time to go.”
She turned back at the muffins, “But…muffins…” she said sadly panning around at all the different flavors.
She was about to follow Don when she gasped again and flew towards one of the pastries. It was a giant blueberry muffin neatly wrapped in plastic that was much bigger than she was. Her eyes widened at the very sight of it and flew towards it as if in a trance.
“Derpy, please, we need to go!” he pleaded.
His voice snapped her out of her trance and flew in his face, “We have to get this muffin!” she said with a serious tone.
“What? Why?”
“Because it’s the biggest muffin I’ve ever seen!” she said. She went over and picked up the large pastry and held it above her head with both hooves, making her sway a bit in the air.
“I don’t even know if I have enough for both-“
“Please?”
“No.”
“Pleeeease?” she asked giving puppy eyes.
“No, not the puppy eyes… fffuuu…”
Visibly defeated, he caved in, “Fine well, take the muffin.”
Her eyes lit up again, “Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!”
He rolled his eyes and noticed three nuns giving him a shocked stare. He thought for a minute before realizing what they were seeing; a floating muffin in front of a guy who is apparently talking to himself. He quickly snatched the muffin from mid-air and made his way passed the three women who followed him with their gaze unmoving. He cleared his throat,
“Sisters.” He said giving them a curt nod.
They only looked on in horror.
“Uh, have a blessed day…and may God be praised.” He said as he did a quick cross over his chest before he left.
“And now you’re going to hell for making it look like you were making fun of them. Way to go, Don.”
“Does that make you a heretic…? Heathen.”
After paying the two made their way back towards his car. There wasn’t much conversation this time on the journey as Derpy was too enthralled on her newly acquired muffin. He made a quick glance towards her and found her laying on top of it, stroking the pastry gently with a content smile on her face.
“Muffin…” he heard her say in her daze.
He shook his head. He didn’t have any spending money for the rest of the weekend, not that he had plans or anything, but at least he could do something for Derpy, regardless of how clumsy she was. Now he had to think about what else to do this weekend, but he could figure that out tomorrow.