//------------------------------// // Unsuited to Task // Story: Painted Mirror // by Lord of Turtles //------------------------------// The ponies broke up from their song and started trotting away, each heading for their own designated area to get started on the seasonal change. Raj went over to the group and said, “That is, without question, the weirdest thing about this planet.” Pinkie rolled her head and said, “What? Do you not have songs on earth?” “That sounds terrible.” Fluttershy shivered. “We have music, we're not barbarians.” He said back defensively. “Could've fooled me.” Spike teased from his perch on Twilight's back. Raj flipped him off, a gesture Raj had only told Spike the meaning of, and the little dragon giggled at the hidden profanity. “We have songs the same as you, we just don't burst out into spontaneous concerts every now and then.” “You'll get there eventually Rajy, you just need to be here longer.” Pinkie chirped as she bounced in a small circle around him. “As a matter of fact...” She smiled slyly and sucked in a long breath, getting ready to launch into another song. Raj caught her on the next bounce and cut her off. “Gonna stop that one in its tracks is you don't mind.” “Everypony, you have your assignments.” Twilight floated a clipboard in front of her, why she needed the board at all when she was manipulating it with magic, Raj was not sure. She checked a box off and pointed at Applejack. “I'm off to start clearing fields. Need to get planting if we're gonna have anythin' to eat here in a month.” AJ drawled as she brushed a dusting of windblown snow from her hat. “Gale's gonna be a problem though, fields won't stay clear at this rate.” Rainbow laughed. “Yeah, sorry about that. Me and the weather team are going to try and find the source of that before we go gather the birds. Shouldn't take more than an hour.” “And I already know what I'm doing.” Fluttershy said with uncloaked glee, “And I can't wait to wake up all my friends. What about you Angel?” The little rabbit by her leg hopped up and down. The little creature excitedly pulled on her leg, either anxious to get started or just to leave in general. “Don't forget Tank!” Dash said and she zipped close. “We still have to wake Tank up.” “And I'm doing what I do every single day!” Pinkie reached into her mane and drew out a pristine eclair, held it for a moment, and then inhaled it. “Snack duty.” She said through a mouthful of pastry. Everypony present laughed lightly and Twilight checked off more boxes on her board. “And I'm taking over nest-making duty for Rarity while she's sick.” Twilight said proudly. “How many outhouses are you going to make this year Twilight?” Spike asked jokingly. Twilight rolled her eyes. “Har har. Very funny. I'll have you know it's a cinch if you follow the template I came up with.” She gave her clipboard a quick scan and nodded. “Raj, did you remember the soup?” Raj looked down at himself and said “I did not.” “Ugh.” Twilight grunted and focused her magic. She disappeared in a flash of light and re-appeared a handful of seconds later, a large jar of soup in her horn’s grip. She floated it to Raj. “Take that to Rarity, make sure she's doing okay. She must be feeling awful about having to miss Winter Wrap up because she's sick.” “Right.” He inspected the jar for a second and asked. “Can I take Spike with me?” She glanced at the little dragon for a moment and said “Yes. I'm sure seeing her favorite dragon will lift her spirits.” “Cool. When I'm done with that, I'll come clear snow with Applejack.” He held out a fist to her. AJ clapped a hoof against his fist and he gave her a scowl. “You call that bump? Put some pepper on it.” “I'll show ya pepper.” She drew back a leg, held it for a second, and stabbed her limb upwards, striking his fist with a crack, making him slide back a step. Raj shook his hand. “There we, ah, that's... ow.” He stuck his hand in the snow and smiled nervously, a good-natured chuckle rumbling up from the group. * * * Raj made his way down the path at a slow walk, the little dragon waddling along at his heels. Above, a patch of clouds were being dragged away by pegasi and bright sunlight assaulted his eyes off the blanket of white covering everything. In the distance, he could see the retreating lines of the plow ponies pushing their rigs in orderly rows. Closer, a team of pegasi were buzzing trees in rapid formations, dragging contrails of snow with them and funneling it towards a central location where wagons drawn by earth ponies were carting it off. “They're doing a lot better than last year already. Skies already cleared up.” Spike said with a pointed claw. Raj looked up to see a few ponies in the sky, bucking clouds into disparate wisps of vapor. “Twilight did a good job setting up after last year.” “Yeah, I heard about that.” Raj said back and continued walking. He eyed the little dragon as slyly as he could, wondering if anything was physically different about him. Crest was the same, scales looked the same, even had the same wide, generally blank eyes. If it was a copy, it was perfect. Rajrishi hadn't forgotten about the task Bon-Bon had given him. He needed to discreetly find out if any of the Elements had been replaced by changelings. The key, he'd figured out, was getting them to demonstrate abilities that couldn't be duplicated. He had managed to entice Twilight to teleport, something no changeling could do no matter how well they could imitate unicorn magic. Pinkie had done some Pinkie nonsense and he felt safe saying that was exclusive to her and no one else. His morning spar with Rainbow had proven who she was, and that she was getting better. She also remembered Tank, and that would have been well outside of her recent memory. Angel seemed convinced Fluttershy was her, and animals seemed better able to sense through a changeling's disguise. And Applejack had demonstrated her incredible strength, another thing changelings couldn't imitate. That left Spike and Rarity. Spike would be the method by which he would sound the alarm if a changeling was found. Tactically, that made him a higher priority target than anyone else. Cut off the enemy's communications and that gives you all the breathing room in the world. He just needed Spike to breathe fire. Like his aetheric resistance, that was a magic shapeshifting couldn't replicate. Thankfully, Raj had come up with a foolproof plan to get his friend to display his magic without arousing any suspicion. Raj picked up a stick from the side of the road and held it out. “Hey Spike. Burn this.” “Sure.” He sucked in a breath and exhaled a puff of green fire that blew the chunk of wood to ash. “Cool.” He said at the display. A foolproof plan. Rarity was going to be harder. She didn't have any incredible powers that were irreproducible like the others, just an encyclopedic knowledge of fashion, something he could not match or verify, and a deliberately put upon manner that would be hard to pierce. Not for the first time, he wondered how mad she would be if Raj punched her in the face to check if she was a changeling. He weighed the dangers of a possible invasion of love thieving bugs, and Rarity enraged by a bloody nose. He found the two to be largely comparable and decided to just wing it. * * * Raj rapped his knuckles on the door to Rarity's boutique. No answer came after a minute so he knocked again. Spike propped himself up on his tail and swiped a window clean to peer in. “Anything?” Raj asked. “No, nothing. Maybe she's asleep?” He offered. “Or in the bathroom.” Raj offered back. He jiggled the knob and found that it turned. “Door's open.” He stepped in and shouted, “Rarity?” “In here. Close the door! You're letting the warmth out.” Came a stuffy reply back. There was indeed a lot of warmth in the house. A blaze was in the fireplace with a small fan set in front of it to disperse the heat better. Further back in the kitchen he saw that the door to the oven was open, ripples of warmth drifting out of it. “Wow.” Spike said as he scraped snow from his feet. “Are we in the Dragon Lands? This is nuts.” “Yeah, must be at least a hundred degrees in here.” Raj answered back as he shrugged out of his coat. “I hope Rarity is okay.” “Me too.” Raj answered back truthfully for entirely different reasons. They found her huddled near a workstation on a chair bent over a faintly steaming bucket with a blanket draped over her head. They heard sniffling from under the wrap. Rarity turned at their approach, blindly addressing them. “No, please, look away. I won't be so *cough* cruel as to force you lay eyes on such vulgarity as this.” Spike frowned and stepped close to her huddled form. “It's fine Rarity, we're here to check on you.” “We come bearing soup.” Raj lifted up the jar of sloshing liquid. “That's very, um, excuse me.” She tore into a series of vicious coughs for a few seconds and then a sneeze so powerful it lifted her chair. She breathed heavy for a bit and started up again. “Nnngg, that's very sweet, both of you. But I would prefer nopony saw me so... un-fabulous. It's a grotesquerie.” Raj rolled his eyes. “Rarity, I've raised a baby. I don't think you're physically capable of being as gross as that.” “And I won't mind, I promise.” Spike pleaded. Rarity coughed a few more times and shuddered from a sudden chill. “Ugh, fine. But only because I don't have the energy to argue.” She drew the wrap off and tossed it to the floor. Honestly, Raj didn't think she looked all that bad. Her hair was rather unkempt and her coat was askew, but that was simply a lack of her normally obsessive regimen. The only signs she was actually ill were the bags under her eyes and a dry film under her nose where it had been running. He thought she might have been a bit paler than usual, but that was hard to tell with Rarity. As he gave her a once over, she wrapped her hooves around her midsection and shivered. “There, you can confirm that I look atrocious. May I wrap up again? I am positively freezing.” Spike looked upset for a moment before his face lit up. “Oh, I know!” he waddled forward and hugged her leg, a thin trickle of smoke rising from his nose. “Spike, what're you-ohhhhh...” She trailed off as Spike started to glow faintly, the furnace of his dragonfire heating him up exponentially. “Oh, Spikey-Wikey, you're so warm.” She lifted him up into her lap and hugged him, luxuriating in the heat he was kicking off. Spike grinned like an idiot, unabashedly happy with the circumstances. Raj smiled faintly at the sight and said, “See? We're already helping. I'll go heat this up. Bowl of hot soup and you'll be right as rain.” “Saucepan is over the stove.” She said dreamily, eyes closed as she cuddled with the little dragon. Raj ventured into the kitchen and found it several degrees warmer than the rest of the house. The oven was open and ripples of heat drifted out of it, raising the temperature of the building even more. Moving gingerly, he dumped the soup into a pot and got started heating it up. So far, Rarity was the most suspect of those he needed to vet. Changelings were cold-averse, so it made sense for one to try and avoid participating in Winter Wrap-Up. However, it was also possible she really did have some weird Equestrian illness that made her so sensitive to the cold, he just had no idea what it could be. He had yet another lack of information and it grated on him. Raj was shaken from his thoughts when he heard Rarity's stuffy voice. “Spike tells me a wonderful smell is coming from in here.” She shuffled up to his side and sniffled. “I can't really tell.” He looked down at the pot of soup and saw a few bubbles breaking the surface. “Yeah, good and hot.” “Fabulous.” Rarity croaked as she stood in front of the blazing oven, still shivering somehow. Raj poured a pair of bowls and slid one to Rarity's seat. “Where's Spike? I made him some.” “Spikey-Wikey was sweet enough to offer to draw me a warm bath.” She huffed. “Celestia knows I probably need it. I haven't had the energy to get a proper wash at all today.” That was surprising. Raj didn't think any illness would keep Rarity from maintaining even the barest bits of her beauty regimen. It wasn't a certainty though, Rarity did present herself as being rather delicate. He decided to give her some rope. “Well, eat in a hurry then, otherwise the water will get cold.” he passed her a spoon. “It's corn chowder. Sweetie Belle told me that your Mom would make this for you when you were sick as kids.” he said as convincingly as he could. Rarity frowned. “I remember no such thing. She probably did that just for Sweetie Belle. I more preferred tomato soup with a grilled sandwich.” “Nice.” He said while silently cursing. Raj had never talked to Sweetie about any such thing, but he was hoping a Changeling might take the bait and go along with it. The fact that she hadn't didn't mean she was actually Rarity, but it was frustrating. She finished her soup and managed to sweet-talk Raj into carrying her upstairs. She shivered in his arms and complained about his chilly skin all the way to the steaming bathroom. Spike stood on a small stool, breathing tongues of green fire into the misty tub. He spun around and cheerfully cried “I got it just the way you like Rarity. Sea salt, lavender, and just a hint of jasmine.” “Thank you Spikey-Wikey.” She patted him on the crest and the little dragon sighed. Raj chose not to comment on how he knew her favorite bath mix by heart. He set Rarity down and she crawled into the bath, letting out a long sigh at the luxuriant heat. She rested with her eyes closed for a few second before cracking them a bit and looking at the two of them. “Thank you both for this. I feel better than I have in days.” Spike blushed hard enough Raj felt a wave of heat waft off of him. “Y-you're welcome Rarity.” “You need anything else Rares?” Raj asked, still eyeing her. She shook her head. “No, this has been lovely, but I don't want to keep you from your first Winter-Wrap Up. Run along, and tell me all about it tomorrow.” Raj stared at her a second, unsure. He was still on the fence with this one. He hadn't gotten her to demonstrate anything definitive, but she hadn't fallen into any logic traps either. From what he read however, no changeling would put itself into such a helpless position as this, lying in a tub next to a dangerous enemy. The two of them said their goodbyes and headed out, Raj lowering the flames in the fireplace and oven to keep the house from burning down and put Spike's share of the soup back in a jar for her later. They left out the door and started trudging off, back into the whirlwind of activity that was Winter-Wrap Up. Spike looked up at him “Remind me to come back and check on her again at the end of the day.” “Sure thing little guy. I think she'll be fine though. Seems like just a cold really.” “Has to be worse than that if she hasn't even taken a bath in a day.” “Eh, you're probably right.” Raj took a few more steps and then stopped, brow furrowed. “Right, she said she hadn't taken a bath yet today.” He stayed where he was, thinking. “What's up?” Spike asked. “Spike, what does Rarity smell like?” he asked bluntly. “Well, um, for winter she usually wears something with some cedar. But no matter the season she has something with lavender in it. She loves lavender.” He said back curiously. He nodded, he had noticed that about her every time he and Rarity hung out. “And did she smell like lavender today?” “Not really, but you said she hasn't taken a bath at all.” Spike said. Raj knew that, but also knew that it didn't matter. His own wife, Mari, always smelled like vanilla. Always... It didn't matter if they had been camping for two days or if she's just come back from the gym, she always at least smelled a little bit like her favorite scent. No matter what. And when Raj was carrying her, he picked up no lavender on Rarity. “Spike wait here. I forgot something at Rarity's.” He turned on a heel and headed back towards the boutique. Spike shouted after him. “What's going on Raj?” “Don't worry Spike. Just stay there.” Raj came back up the steps just as she was stepping out of the bathroom. She looked at him with a gasp and said “Rajrishi! You startled me. Did, did you forget something? Why are you-” “Where is she?” He said levelly. She paused for a second and asked back. “Where is who dear?” “You know damn well who. Where is she?” He said again, anger edging into his voice. She took a step back. “I'm afraid I have no idea what you're talking-” Raj rushed, moving faster than she could react. He wrapped a hand around her neck and lifted her easily. She struggled in his grip, hooves clutching at him. He smashed her back into a wall hard enough to hurt, not to harm. He roared “Where is she!” She started crying, tears streaming down her white face. “I don't know what you're talking ab-ou-ou-out!” “Rarity always smells like lavender!” He shouted. “You hear me, lavender! It's her favorite smell, she always wears it. And there is none of it on you. So for the last time, where is she?” She bit him, hard. Pain flared up and his grip weakened. She pushed a hoof against his chest and dropped, coughing like mad. Raj clutched his wrist and inspected the bite, expecting to find a ridge of blunt indentations. What he found instead was a pair of narrow holes, long feelers of glowing green stemming from the wounds under his skin. A flare of green filled the hall and a shiny, black monster lie crouched before him. It was still roughly pony shaped, with huge eyes and four hooves, but that was about where the similarities ended. Instead of bright, expressive orbs, its eyes were one solid color, a burning red. Instead of the elegant legs of a pony, this thing had hard hinges on its limbs like a grasshopper, cracked holes bored in its lower legs for some inscrutable purpose. Instead of a coat it had shining, black carapace in segmented layers. Instead of a mane, it had ridges of chitin that shined sharp and menacing. It was like someone had crudely combined the basic forms of a pony with some of the more menacing and frightening parts of a dozen insects. He took all that in in about a second before the thing hissed at him, showing a tongue and a mouthful of wet fangs. Then it’s back opened up and a pair of diaphanous wings unfolded. It beat the air and started towards the stairs. Raj snapped out of his stupor and lunged, wrapping the fingers of his good hand around its tail, faintly repulsed by the wet rubber texture of it. An inch of tail escaped his grip and he drew back, the changeling flapping and pulling at his hold. He yanked it back, grabbing the thing by a chitinous plate. It struggled, trying the slice at him with the barbed edges of its holed hooves and bite with its long fangs. He got it into a hold and dragged it into the bathroom. Facing away from him, he held it out at arms length and pushed it down, dunking its head into the tub. It flailed, splashing perfumed water all over. He lifted it up and let it draw in a breath for a moment before putting it under again. He drew it out once more and shouted “Where!?” “Raj!” came a voice from somewhere else in the house. “What's going on?” The changeling opened its mouth and screamed in a perfect replica of Rarity's voice “Spike!” Raj scowled and dunked it again, hoping to shut it up. It went quiet, but the water didn't stop it from shifting again. It was a curious feeling, the sensation of hard carapace morphing to soft flesh in a flicker of energy, but all of a sudden he was holding Rarity in his hands. Spike chose that moment to come around the corner into the bathroom. Raj heard a gasp and he turned to see a look of absolute terror on his friend's face. He shook his head and cried “Spike-” That's all he got out before he was hit by a wall of fire. Somehow, Spike managed to put force behind it rather than heat. So instead of being burned to a blackened skeleton, he was instead hurled against the far wall hard enough to leave a man-shaped dent in the plaster. Raj slumped to the ground groaning, stunned from the hit. When next he came back to reality he saw Spike standing next to a sputtering Rarity, water coughing up from her lungs. Raj staggered up to his feet and rasped “Spike, get away from her.” Spike gave him the ugliest look he had ever seen the little dragon give anyone. It surprised him enough he leaned back against the wall. He hissed “Don't take another step Raj, or I swear I will melt you into the tile.” Not-Rarity rose to her hooves and purred. “Thank you Spikey. I don't know what came over him, he just tried to drown me in my own bath!” “It's fine, go get help. I'll keep an eye on him.” Raj said back, never taking his eyes off of the mad human in front of him. Raj staggered and held up a mollifying hand. “No, Spike, you can't let her leave. That's not Rarity.” “Raj, shutup.” “No, Spike, listen. That isn't Rarity. It's a changeling in disguise. You have to believe me.” “I have no idea what you're talking about, you brute!” Not-Rarity huffed, still playing the part. Raj ignored her. “Spike, look. She bit me okay, look.” Raj held up his hand, showing the holes in his hand and the green lines radiating from them. Spike saw them and Raj saw doubt enter his eyes. Apparently that was enough for the changeling and she curled up her back legs, pivoted, and bucked the little dragon squarely in the back of the head, sending him flying into Raj's chest. Raj caught the dragon and set him down as gingerly as possible. The thing was already gone, trying to flee the building. If the thing got outside, he'd have a repeat of Spike in the bathroom, except with a whole lot of ponies, most of whom didn't particularly care for him. There was no way he'd be able to convince anyone out there. He launched himself after the fleeing changeling, bursting around corners and all but hurling himself down the stairs. He saw it at the open door, an instant from escape. Running on instinct, he pulled his knife and hurled it. The throw was clumsy but accurate, the flat of the blade striking her in the back of the head. Despite the bad throw, almost a full pound of metal hurled with his incredible strength had enough force to put the thing on the ground. The Rarity disguise flickered off as he approached, the bump on the back of her head turning into an green-oozing crack in the chitin. He dragged the thing back inside, grumbling sourly to himself. Spike came down a few minutes later to see an unconscious changeling with a decorative chain fed through the holes in its legs. He rubbed his sore head and muttered “Raj? What the Tartatus is going on?” “Take a letter Spike, we got work to do.”