//------------------------------//
// That's Not Funny! 
// Story: A Day In The Life 
// by A Wild Magikarp 
//------------------------------//

Applejack grinned as she emptied a bucket of apples into her latest customer's saddlebag. Today had been a good day for business, the best in recent memory. Her cart was already nearly empty and the clock tower hadn't even struck two yet! Shaking the bucket for good measure, she set it down next to her dwindling supply of produce and gave a friendly smile.

"Thank ya for the business! Don't be a stranger, and remember we still got fresh produce through next week!"

Pokey Pierce adjusted his bags straps, then returned the smile. "I'll keep it in mind, Applejack, thanks. Have a good rest of your day!"

Waving goodbye to the unicorn, Applejack turned her gaze to her lock-box. Yep, definitely a good day. Sales always went up this time of year, when the days got shorter and the weather colder in preparation for winter. Next week would be the last week to get a good harvest out of the orchard before things started winding down for the colder part of the year, and ponies were stocking up on everything in preparation.

Looking at how many apples were left, Applejack considered turning in for the day and using the afternoon to work on some of the more pressing matters on the farm, when an approaching set of hoof steps caught her ear. Putting on another winning smile, Applejack looked up to see another familiar face arriving at her booth.

"Well howdy there, Rose! Mighty fine day today isn't it?"

Roseluck gave her market stall neighbor an attempt at smiling, but something about it seemed forced. Applejack felt her own smile slip a little at the sight.

"H-Hey, Applejack. Yes, I guess it is rather nice. A little cold though."

"I hear ya. How are things going over at your stall? Getting much business?"

"I can't complain. Pretty average day if I am honest." The cream colored mare looked around for a moment, seeming unsure of herself, before continuing.

"Applejack? I was kinda wondering if you... Well... You know Night Sky, right?"

"Sky, the astronomer that lived over by the forest? Sure do! His place is actually on the way between here and Sweet Apple Acres. Don't talk to each other much, but he's an agreeable sort, and he helped quite a bit with that whole monster incident a few weeks back, so he's an alright fella."

"You... wouldn't have happened to see him recently, have you?"

"Hmm... Can't say that I have. Been 'bout a week since I've seen him in town. Reckon he spends most of his time in that fancy lab of his if what Apple Bloom told me is right. Why do ya ask?"

Rose's ears lay back. "I-I-It's just that... Well he came into town a few days ago, when Mac was running your stall. He came over to talk, and, well... W-We were talking about meeting for lunch the next day when Zecora came over to buy some ingredients or something from Lilly. They started talking, and when Zecora left, Sky went with her. H-He was interested in her potion making you see, and I... I may have told him how Zecora lives in the Everfree, and how good she is at finding her way there and Zecora told him how safe she had made the path to her hut and Sky decided hewantedto-!"

"Whoa there girl, whoa! Take it easy!" Applejack put a hoof on the flower pony's shoulder, trying to calm the panicking mare. "Just calm down. Tell me what happened."

Rose took a couple calming breaths, and shook her head. "N-Nothings! At least, I don't KNOW anything happened, its just... He didn't show up for lunch the next day, and I haven't seen him in town since. I-I suppose he could have just forgotten, or gotten busy or something, but I know how dangerous the forest can be, and... well..."

Applejack nodded in understanding. "I get ya. Makes perfect sense for ya to be worried. Honestly, its a mite disturbing to hear." Applejack scratched her chin as she thought about it. "Tell ya what. I was just thinkin' 'bout packing it up for the day. How bout I close up for the afternoon, and we can go over to Sky's place and see if he's there? If not, I'll see if I can't get some of the girls together and we can go find Zecora and ask her about it. If'n he's lost in the forest somewhere, we'll want some ponies to help us look."

Rose visibly relaxed at the idea, breathing a sigh of relief. "Oh thank you, Applejack! Thank you so much! I'm sorry for making such a big deal about it, I know I worry too much over all sorts of things. Its just, I just don't know what to do with missing ponies! That's more you and your friends' thing."

"Well don't worry TOO much, we don't know if he's missing just yet. Lets not jump to conclusions now." Applejack reminded, closing the top of her stall and latching it down to keep the remaining apples safe from falling out. Moving around, she quickly strapped herself in.

"Alrighty then, lets get a move on, find out whats happening."





The farmer and the florist arrived quickly at the observatory. The trip there had been mostly a silent one, as Applejack moved with a quiet determination, and Rose spent her time silently fretting.

But soon enough they arrived at the large white building, its walls unmarred by  claws or gaping holes. The construction team had done their job well, and there was no evidence pointing towards a recent monster attack.

Though perhaps more unsettling was the lack of any sign of life. The newspaper, two days old, was sitting on the front porch, untouched. The curtains were drawn, and you could see through the small window in the door that the lights where out. The place appeared abandoned.

It did not sit right with the apple farmer one bit.

Shrugging of her cart, Applejack made her way up to the door, and looked over to a equally worried looking Roseluck before knocking loudly.

"Sky? Sky, are ya in there? It's Applejack and Roseluck! We uh, haven't seen ya in a few days, and just wanted to make sure everything is alright."

A weight lifted off of both ponies shoulders as there came a sound of shifting and muttered words. There was somepony in there, and Sky was the only one living here. A moment of silence passed before a shuffling could be heard approaching the door. The sound stopped at the other side of the barrier, but the door did not open.

"A-Applejack? Rose? W-What are you doing here? I'm... not expecting company."

Applejack raised an eyebrow at that. "Like I said. We came to check up on you. Rose here says you missed your lunch a couple days back, and hasn't seen hide nor hair of ya since then. Anything we should know about?"

"No! No, no everything is fine, Applejack, thank you, I'm just... I'm very busy at the moment, so I haven't been able to come into town recently. I'm sorry I missed our lunch, Rose, you understand, right?"

The two mares looked at each other. Applejack had a skeptical look on her face, while Rose sported one of concern. It didn't take a master at reading social cues to know that Sky was hiding something. Rose looked back to the door, while Applejack quietly made her way around the outside of the building, looking for anything out of the ordinary.

"Are you sure you're okay, Sky? You sound like you're," She looked for a word other than lying. "... Worried."

"I-I'm fine, Roseluck, thank you. I'm just... really busy, like I said."

"Would you mind if we came in real quick? We won't bother you too long, and I think-"

"NO! No-I mean-that's... I have a lot to catch up on, Rose. I'm sorry, but I'm not seeing anypony right now. I think you and Applejack should leave. I'm... perfectly okay, as you can see, and I have research to do."

Applejack returned from making her way around the house, with nothing to show for it. She furrowed her brow at the still locked door in front of them.

"No can do, partner. I may be no good at lying myself, but I can tell when somepony ain't being honest with me either. Why don't you tell us what's REALLY going on, Sky?"

It was quiet for a moment, and if you listened carefully, one could hear him shifting nervously.

"It's nothing, Applejack, honestly. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a LOT of studying to do."

Applejack heard the sound of retreating hoofsteps, and couldn't help the look of indignation. She was trying to be neighborly, and he had just walked off? A scowl formed, and she once again began knocking on the door, this time with more force than strictly necessary.

"Sky? Sky, you get back her right now! We ain't done here yet, mister! I-"

Rose, not wanting to see this escalate, stepped in. "Applejack, enough! If... if he doesn't want to see us, that's okay. We can just go."

"What? Rose, he's hiding something! You heard 'em when I asked what was happening, that stallion was as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a roomful of rocking chairs! He ain't telling us everything."

"And that's his business, not ours. We don't have any right to bother him over what he doesn't want to share. He's not lost in the forest somewhere, and that's what we came here to find out, right?"

"Well, ya but... Well I... Dagnabbit, fine. This whole thing stinks something fierce though."

With that, Applejack tugged her hat down over her eyes and made her way back to her cart, strapping herself in and making her way down towards the farm. Rose looked once more at the closed blinds of the observatory, before making her own way back to town.





'Six days,' Applejack thought to herself as she stood behind her stall, scowling off into space. 'Six day, and still nopony has seen Sky in the market.'

Sure, he could have just not come to shop recently. But if what Rose had said was true, it would have been over a week since he had been to town at all! Even Twilight made it out her library more often than that! Something was going on, and she didn't like it one bit.

Huffing in frustration, she drew the attention of Berry Punch, passing by the stand. She quickly put on a smile, which the mare reciprocated before continuing on her way. As soon as she was gone, Applejack's foul mood reappeared.

She didn't even understand why she was still so focused on the whole thing. Plenty of ponies had things they didn't want to share. Everypony had secrets, even the Apple family, much to her chagrin. So why did it rub her the wrong way when Night Sky had lied to her from the other side of that door? It was something in his voice, she decided, something that made her coat itch. Why did it bother her?

'It's cause he was afraid.' She realized, blinking at the realization. 'He wasn't angry, or even nervous. He was scared. What was he scared of?' This new question gnawed at her. She stared down at her stand, deep in her own contemplation's. 

That was how a burly, red and orange stallion found her, eyes darting back and forth, muttering to herself. He slowly moved the piece of straw in his mouth to the other side, seeing if she would notice him, before he decided to take a more active approach.

"AJ."

The cowpony jumped in surprise, looking up to find her brother waiting patiently as ever for her.

"Oh, Mac, you're here. Done gettin' all them supplies to fix the fence?"

The stoic draft pony looked over his shoulder at the wagon of tools, lumber, and nails he had just picked up from the hardware store. "Eeyup."

"Sorry I didn't notice you, I was a mite distracted as you could see."

"Eeyup."

"Ya see, it's the new pony, Sky, the one who moved here from Canterlot a while back? Ah went with Roseluck a few days ago to check on him since he hadn't shown in town recently, and she was growing a bit nervous over it, since he missed a meet up they where going to have. But when we got to his place, he was home, just wouldn't come out to greet us! Had a whole conversation with him through the door, and when I asked him to open up and let us in, he just walked away! Can you believe that?"

"Nope."

Applejack raised a brow a little at that. "Well, I MAY have been just a LITTLE bit pushy about it. I was just concerned about what was going on is all, no need to be smart about it."

Macintosh raised an eyebrow of his own, and Applejack's ears folded back.

"Well okay, maybe more than a LITTLE pushy." She sighed. "It's just... he was hiding something, Mac, and ah don't like it. Whatever it was had him worried, scared really."

Mac shifted the hay in his mouth again, giving her time to think it over.

"... Whatever it is that has him worked up, he still hasn't come back into town since then. Rose said to leave it be, but..." A moment of contemplation, then she stomped her hoof in determination. "Aw hooey, whatever it is, he obviously hasn't figured it out yet. No telling what it is but I ain't about to sit here and do nothing." She stepped out from behind the stall. "Big Mac? I need ya to watch the stall when I go figure this whole thing out."

"AJ..."

"I'm just trying to be a good friend here, Mac. Sky's done right by us, and whatever is going on, I want to return the favor. It started right after Sky came back from the Everfree, and no good comes from that forest. You good to take over for a bit while I try to figure this out?"

Mac mulled it over for a second, before letting out a near imperceivable sigh and nodding his head.

"Eeyup."

Applejack threw a leg around him in a quick hug. "Thanks, Mac. I'll be back as soon as I'm done to take over."

She trotted off in the direction of the flower mare's stalls, before pausing mid step, and after a moment of thought, adjusted course towards the shops outlying the market. Macintosh raised his eyebrow at that, but still moved his wagon over next to the stall and got behind it, just as another pony approached with an empty saddlebag and a bag of bits. His sister had good intentions, but she could be a busy-body sometimes.





"Sky? Sky, its AJ and Rose again! Its been almost a week and nopony's seen ya!"

No response. It was all quiet, but that didn't dissuade her. The lights were on this time, and the paper was still there. Looking over to her companion in this, Applejack gave Rose a grim-faced nod, which was returned by the excitable mare. They had already talked on the way here, and Rose knew what that look meant.

'Don't interrupt, I'll handle this.'

"Listen, I'm sorry I raised my voice at you last time, Sky, but we know you went inta' the forest with Zecora last time you came to town, and I think I know why you're so scared to see anypony. I promise I can help, but I can't do nothin' unless you come out." She took a deep breath. "That being said... If you aint' out here in the next ten seconds, I'm going to personally bust down this door and drag you out of there myself!"

Rose looked at her in concern, but said nothing, choosing to trust the farm pony. Silence was once again her answer, and one she took as a challenge.

"ONE!... TWO!... THR-"

"Okay, okay! I'll open the door, just... don't break my house... again."

The clop of hooves approached the door, before they heard Sky stop at the other side. Neither of them heard any attempt at unlocking it however, as Sky seemed to hesitate on the other side.

This time, Rose did speak up.

"Sky? I know we haven't been friends for very long, but... you trust us, right?"

"... You promise you won't laugh?"

Applejack allowed herself a small, smug grin upon hearing that, while Rose blinked in surprise.

"Laugh, why would I... I mean, yes, of course. I promise."

A moment, and the clack of the deadbolt and the swish of a security bolt later, and the door opened just a crack. Looking out at them however, was not a dark stallion with messy mane and amber eyes, but a pale coat, perfect coiffure, and baby blues.

The girls blinked in surprise, and Applejack cocked her head in confusion.

"Err... Prince Blueblood?"

Rose jumped as if she had been shocked, turning to her companion in horror.

"P-P-Prince?!"

A sigh left the royal's mouth as he opened the door to fully reveal himself, in all his perfectly kempt glory. "No, thank Celestia."

Rose had never met Canterlot royalty before, but that voice was familiar to her all the same. It was hard to believe what her ears where telling her.

"Sky? That's you?"

The stallion hung his head and nodded, while the florist scratched her own. Applejack took the opportunity to clarify.

"I take it ya woke up like this the day after ya visited Zecora's place?" Sky looked up at her in surprise, which she took as a yes. "You ain't the first pony to wind up changed after a trip into that forest." She said with a grin. "The gals and I got ourselves all kinds of weird and unnatural the when Twilight first got to town. Followed Zecora into the woods and got ourselves in a patch of this no-good weed, 'poison joke'. It's a blue flower with some sort of magic to it, pulls some mean spirited prank on ya when you wake up the next day." Looking him up and down, Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Can't say I understand yours though. From Rarity's account the prince was a bit of a sleaze, but why would it change YOU into him?"

"Because he is everything wrong with Canterlot..." Sky muttered.

"Huh?"

Sky's face darkened as he explained. "I knew the prince. At least, I knew him as well as anypony knows their schoolyard bullies. He hasn't changed much since then." He huffed and looked down at his own hoof, foreign, but not unfamiliar. "Lord Blueblood the Sixth was a good sort of pony, for a noble at least. My dad worked for him on a couple of projects, and he say's he was always fair. Even enjoyed working for him he said. Unfortunately the same can't be said for his son." Sky paused as he remembered his childhood in the capitol. "He didn't hire a tutor like most other nobility, said he wanted the prince to learn how to 'interact with the common pony.' Sent him to public school with the rest of us." Sky scoffed at the memory, his tail swishing in irritation.

"Feh. Of course the young prince took that as he should learn how to elevate himself above the rest of us. Had a group of foals throwing themselves as his every beck and call within a week, and anyone else was either not worth his attention, or in cases like mine, all the wrong kinds of attention."

"That's awful! Why didn't you say anything?" Rose asked.

"To who, the faculty? They were all terrified of him! His allowance was more than some of their paychecks, and if he cried to mommy they where treating him poorly, they where out of the job for sure. No way was I ever going to manage to talk to his parents, their private estate is practically a gated community. No, I just had to suffer him through my public school years."

The mares looked at each other in concern, then back to Sky, who saw their faces. He sighed.

"I guess it wasn't THAT bad. I may be remembering it through tinted lenses. I wasn't his only target, it just felt like it sometimes. He eventually left me mostly alone after a couple years, and if it wasn't for him I probably wouldn't be friends with Clockwork today. I probably wouldn't have meet Quick Write if not for him either. It's just... Every time I remember that he is supposedly the 'Elite of the Elite' in Canterlot society nowadays, well... I guess it explains why this 'poison joke' did what it did to me." 

His eyes quickly lit up at that, and he looked to Applejack with hope. "You said you could help? I've been trying everything I could think of, but I don't really have a lot to work with, and well... I haven't been really eager to be seen in public recently."

Applejack smiled. "Sure can! Well, not me, but I know ponies who can! Lotus and Aloe, they run the spa in Ponyville. After the first time this happened, they got the recipe for the cure from Zecora, and have it stocked at their shop. Nopony really goes into the forest at all to get affected, but apparently its super relaxing or somethin' ta take a bath in."

"Bath?"

"Yup. Ain't no potion or poultice or anything fancy! It's more like a soap or something. Just take a bath with the stuff. I actually picked some up before getting Rose on a hunch. Here." Reaching into her saddlebag, she pulled out a bright pink bottle labeled 'natures remedy', with an artistic depiction of a beautiful blue lily.

A lily that look suspiciously familiar as he eyed it more closely.

"Looks familiar?" Applejack asked, apparently reading his face. Sky snorted and shook his head in disbelief. Not that he didn't trust Applejack, it was just that the whole thing seemed ridiculous.

"So what, fill the tub and put some of this in it? That simple?" Applejack nodded, holding the bottle out to him, which he gladly accepted. "I'll make it priority number one."

"It really bothers you that much?" Rose asked quietly, looking him over once again. Sky shifted uncomfortably under the scrutiny, Applejack taking that as a yes. She snickered, before putting a hoof around Rose's shoulders.

"Come on girl, let stop ogling the poor fella and let him get 'decent', hmm?"

Both of the others jumped at the farm pony's words, and a rosy color entered the cheeks of the florist.

"W-What?! No, I-I wasn't... I mean Sky is nice and all but... It's just..." She looked down, slightly ashamed of herself. "I've never been so close to the prince before." She looked back up at the transformed Sky, eyes wandering to his flank. "He can't be all THAT bad, right?"

Sky for his part managed to maintain composure, putting on a straight face as he considered for a moment what his new friends was saying, before shaking his head vigorously.

"Nope. Using this now. Thanks for all your help, Applejack, I'll see you in town tomorrow."

Laughing so hard she was beginning to tear up, Applejack lead a blushing Rose back to town, while Sky made a B-line for the bathroom. The sooner he was back in his own coat, the better.