A scream. I remember it. Mine? Of course. It has to be mine. No one else there. I remember that feeling. My heart dropping, my soul being crushed, my vision blurred by tears. I remember it. I dream of it every night. It is my nightmare!
Star sat up quickly, angrily clutching at a pillow. She threw across the room with a huff. She needed a moment. Her body was covered with sweat. She put her hooves to her head and groaned. These memories, these thoughts. Why wouldn't they just leave her alone.
"Why can't I just sleep in peace," She sobbed.
=====
"Five years. It's been five years," Star stated. "Why won't these dreams stop, Aunt Celestia?"
Celestia looked up at her niece. She was the spitting image of her mother. She was tall and thin, with coat as dark a blue as the nighttime sky. A rich violet color flowed in her mane, the kind of violet you only see with the setting of the sun. Silver streaks, like starts, ran through her mane. Her eyes were the one of the only things that could even hint at her father being a dragon. She inherited Spike's green eyes. Her eyes beautiful, glinting in the light in way only a gem could.
"Aunt Celestia, are you listening to me?"
"I'm sorry, Star," Celestia replied. "I wish I could help you, but I do not know what more to do. You have tried everything that I knew of. I know your are troubled, bu-"
"Troubled?" Star interrupted. "My nights aren't 'troubled'. They are torturous! I am plagued by these memories, reliving that night over and over and over. When will it end? Why won't it stop? Why can't you do anything?!â€
Normally, shouting and yelling within the castle would have brought at least a few guards in from elsewhere. Over the years, though, Star's outbursts hadn't ceased. They became commonplace. She could be seen or heard yelling or shouting at somepony. For a while it was to be expected. She was grieving. But this was getting old.
"Star Shadow," Celestia said, stepping down from her throne. “Enough of this! You are of an age now where you should be able to control yourself. Hold thy tongue if you cannot speak to me in an appropriate manner, or at least an appropriate volume."
"I'll take my leave then, Princess," Star said with more than a hint of sarcasm in her tone. She turned around and stepped away from Celestia. In the midst of her third step there was a noticeable darkening of the area around her. In the next instant Star was gone. She had teleported somewhere. Celestia gave up on trying to follow movements. The Princess sighed heavily.
=====
In a flash of darkness Star Shadow emerged in one of her favorite spots in the castle grounds. It was one of the highest point in the tallest towers of the castle. Somepony once told her that Luna loved to try and get as high as she could when she was just a filly. Even then she wanted to be as close to the stars as she could. But that wasn't why Star liked it. It was far away from anypony else. It was isolated and quiet. It was dark most of the time due to the fact that the windows were insanely small and placed high up on the walls. A small Pegasus could fit in, but nothing even remotely bigger than that.
Star breathed in the familiar scent of her home away from home. It was a strange scent of several old scented candles that she had smuggled up here all blended together. It wasn't really a good smell, but it was far from horrible as well. The center of the round room had a bed of pillows and blankets in. She trudged over to them and let herself fall into the softness. Only there was no softness. Only the hard crack of another body.
"Oww!"
"Ooh, Star, gave a pony some warning, will ya," Starlight exclaimed, rubbing her head.
"Charmer?" Star said her name but it was more in shock than recognition. "What are you doing here? How did you even get in here?"
"Oh, a couple of the guards let me in," Starlight answered. "You know, through the door."
"That door hasn't been opened in over a thousand years," Star said flatly.
"That would explain all the trouble they had," Charmer replied, faking any surprise she was showing.
"I still don't understand how you can get any pony you want to do anything you want," Star told her friend as she laid back among the pillows. "What kind of magic is that?"
"First off, I don't need magic to do that," Charmer acknowledged, "I've got the looks to charm most stallions, and the magic for anypony else. It's all about reading the pony to know which to use. Of course having a cutie mark for charms and illusions doesn't hurt. In fact, it helps so much."
Star glanced over at her friends flank. Her cutie mark was quite lovely. A line of dark, yet shimmering smoke coiling its around a translucent heart, the color of which matched the blue in her eyes. She rolled her eyes. What a ridiculous cutie mark.
"When was the last time you ever did anything for yourself? I'm genuinely curious," Star asked.
"I made my own breakfast," Charmer remembered, "I think it was last week. I made toast. I even put jam on it."
Star finally decided to just let the conversation die. She collapsed into the bed of pillows, this time without hitting another pony. She took one of the larger body pillows and held it close to her. This was one of her favorite feelings. Holding something close. She could close her eyes and drift away, lost in a sea of comfortable fabrics. The scent of all her candles lazily hanging in the air. She had fallen asleep up here so many times.
"Another dream, Star?"
Star slowly opened her eyes. "Yes. This one didn't last as long as some of the others, but I still woke up with that scream echoing in my head. I can't take it anymore."
"What are you gonna do." Charmer asked, lowering herself down to rest next to her friend.
"I don't know, Charmer,†Star said. “I've tried everything Celestia knows of."
"Oh, well that's your first problem," Charmer replied.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"Celestia may be a thousand year old Princess, but I really don't think she knows that much about dreams and nightmares, or how to stop them,†Charmer said. "And if your going to ask a Princess for help, why not ask one with more of a magical kick?"
"I have no idea what your going on about."
This time it was Starlight Charmer's turn to roll her eyes. "Princess Twilight, obviously."
"Why would I go and see her," Star growled. She threw her pillow against the far wall with a startlingly large amount of force. “Last time I asked for her help, she wouldn't even look at me."
Charmer saw the anger in her friend. It was all too common look for her. She remembered back when she first met her friend. A lost little Unicorn filly, so full of hope and happiness. Even for being the daughter of the Night, she could brighten up a room. And now all that was gone. All that hope and happiness had been drained out of her for the last five years, replaced with an anger and resentment for just about anything and everything.
"Star," Charmer said with a rather serious tone. "You need to go see Twilight. Even if she can't help you with your dreams, she can still help you."
"Oh yeah? How," Star asked sarcastically.
"Closure, Star," Charmer replied. "You've never told me what you saw that night, but I know it's been haunting you. Maybe Twilight can help. She and -"
"Don't say his name," Star interrupted.
"They were close once," Charmer finished. "She might have some answers for you."
"And what if she doesn't," Star turned to face her friend. She had a very intense look in her eyes. It wasn't quite anger. Charmer couldn't really tell what it was she was thinking. "What if I go all the way there, and she has nothing for me? No answers, no closure, nothing at all. What then?"
"First of all, you wouldn't be going," Charmer replied. "We would both be going. And if you don't get anything, then we run away."
"You can't be serious."
"Of course I'm not," Charmer replied with a giggle. "But it's an idea, isn't it?"
"You're never going to let this go if I don't agree to go an see her, are you?"
"What are friends for," Charmer teased Star as she stood up.
"Fine," Star groaned. "But we're leaving my way."
Before Charmer's smile could fade she could feel it. A slight tingle in her coat. A minor ringing in her ears. The world around her darkened for just an instant, and then it was gone. Before she even realized it, she was somewhere else. Her eyes darted around. The tower was gone. No more dusty pillows and old candles.
"You can breathe now, Charmer," Star said.
Charmer didn't even know she was holding her breath. She breathed in deep for a couple of seconds. She brushed part of her mane back behind her ear.
"You know I hate it when you do that," She told Star. "I can't stand teleporting. I don't know how you do it."
"It's as easy as walking, or breathing," Star explained. "I just have to know where I'm going."
"And where exactly is this?" Charmer looked around. Posters and fliers littered the brick walls. A few trash cans held most of the trash, but some of it spilled onto the concrete floors. The noise of many ponies moving and talking was all around them.
"A small alley by the train station," Star grinned before noticing her friends questioning stare. "It's not the first time I've been here."
"Clearly. But why an alley of all places?"
"So you can make sure we don't get recognized when we get on the train."
"Oh, that actually makes sense."
Charmer didn't have to put too much effort into her spell. She merely focused on their bodies. She wasn't going to do anything too drastic. She simply adjusted the already existing colors of their coats and manes. She lightened Star's coat a lot and made her mane and tail a single color a few shades lighter. Her own coat was white, so she had to change it to a light cream color, with her mane a dark chocolate brown. It was a simple enough thing for her to do. She examined Star to see her work.
"Oh, you look lovely," Charmer exclaimed as she saw one last thing she had to change. "Oh, but your eyes. They're a dead giveaway."
Her horn flashed with a bit of magic as she switched Star's slit, dragon eyes to a normal pony's. She also changed their color just a bit. She simply kept the green, but darkened it just enough to pass as different.
"There we are. Just don't smile and we'll be fine."
"Smiling is your thing. Let's just go."