//------------------------------// // Library's Fading Light vs. The Desperate Raid on the Henhouse // Story: The Sleep-Deprived Sisterhooves Social // by Wise Cracker //------------------------------// Vinyl Scratch was trying to relax in the shade of a tree, hoping to catch up on sleep as a preparation for the next event. Scootaloo did her preparing by running around like a blinded chicken. “No, no, no, no...” the girl whined, clippity-clopping about on the grass in a futile attempt to work off some of that anxious energy. Such was the plight of non-unicorns, who sorely lacked the ability to create, squeeze, and potentially obliterate stress balls with their thoughts. “How did I forget about the singing contest? I can’t sing! Spike was right; he’s gonna beat us.” Vinyl winced. No catching up on sleep now, not when her niece was like this. “Relax, kiddo. We’ve got this in the bag.” “How?” Scootaloo half-screamed. “We have to sing, Aunt Vinyl. Both of us!” Vinyl heard a rustling noise in the leaves above her. She grinned, before raising her voice. “Look, it’s fine. I know you’re a terrible singer and you’re probably gonna make a fool of yourself in front of everypony. But that’s just how things are.” The filly cringed. “What?” Vinyl’s eyebrows bobbed up and down, and her right ear flicked towards the top of the tree. Scootaloo pouted. “But you said you’d help me win. I can’t win all on my own. You promised.” Clever girl. “Well, you should’ve asked somepony better, then.” “I can’t ask anypony better,” Scootaloo whined, stealing glances at the tree. “You’re all I’ve got.” Vinyl waited. No response came out of the tree. Nothing for it but to amp up the act, unfortunately. “Then there’s only one thing we can do. We’re just gonna have to cheese it.” This took a while to process. “Cheese it?” “Yeah, cheese it. You don’t know what that means?” Scootaloo shook her head. Vinyl huffed dramatically. “That’s what you get for being such a goody four-shoes. Cheesing is like cheating, only not. If you want to win the singing contest, we’re gonna have to skirt the rules a little bit.” “So we’re cheating? You want me to cheat?” The leaves rustled more. Vinyl grumbled. Rainbow Dash was in there, she was sure of it. She recognised the perfume: Aerial Acrobat, same thing Spitfire used. Still the mare wasn’t coming down. She couldn’t risk laying it on too thickly; Rainbow might figure out the ploy. “Cheating is when you break the rules, Scootaloo,” Vinyl said clearly. “Cheesing is when you do something that ought to be breaking the rules, but the rules forgot to mention. We’ve got a leg up on the competition now. Two legs, even: for one thing, we won the last event.” Scootaloo’s stomach didn’t think much of that, and let her know with a nervous groan from down below. Scootaloo herself tried not to let it show so much, because her stomach was a pansy like that. “What’s the other leg up?” “Everypony in town wants to have fun and fight fair,” Vinyl joked. “What’s that girl’s name, again? The rich kid in your class? Diamond Cutlery or whatever?” “Diamond Tiara? What’s she got to do with it?” “Is she around here?” Scootaloo scoffed. “No. She’d never go to something like this.” Vinyl grinned. “My point exactly. A girl like that would be a problem here, but there aren’t any little kids like her around, so any grownups who are like that are gonna get the upper hoof. These sorts of contest are high-brow; they’re not that common in a place like Ponyville, meaning nopony in town is gonna know all the rules and all the ways to play around them. It’s easy pickings if you just know how to play the game. So use your head, kiddo. Think dirty. How does a bad singer like you score points in a singing contest like this?” The little filly didn’t need long to ponder her options. “Sing really, really loud?” Vinyl rolled her eyes, though the shades hid most of the gesture. “Close, but not quite. Think, Scootaloo, think. We have to pick a song and sing it as best we can.” “But I can’t sing. Everypony always says I shout too loud. That’s what I do, I can’t help it.” Vinyl nodded. “Exactly. So...” The penny finally dropped. “So… we can sing a song that involves a lot of shouting?” The unicorn smirked and gave the filly’s nose a quick little boop of the hoof. “Now you’re thinkin’ inside the chimney.” Twilight paced around, thinking while Spike enjoyed an apple fritter for second breakfast. Or third, she was having trouble counting today. “A singing contest? Spike, what are we going to do?” “Whash the matter? You can shing, can’t you?” Spike said with his mouth full. “Yes, but not like this! I don’t know any good songs! I wasn’t prepared for this!” She stared at the little dragon then. “Wait. Were you?” He gulped, then snickered. “I may have kind of, sort of already given the judges the song, yes.” “Oh, Spike, what have you done?” Twilight buried her head in her hooves. “There are rules to this sort of thing, criteria you’re judged on for the song’s difficulty, skills you need to display to make up for a lack of difficulty. We’ll be making fools of ourselves.” “Not necessarily. I mean, all I did was give them the music. I didn’t break any rules, and it’s not like it’s something you can’t sing.” She sighed in defeat. “Which one did you get?” “That song you started singing before bed. The Canterlot Unicorn Lullabye: Library’s Fading Light.” Twilight opened her mouth to protest, to object, to do all those things peasants usually did when a unicorn was saying something they didn’t like and before said unicorn opened their spellbook to quell such protests. This, however, wasn’t such a frightening prospect. There weren’t any spellbooks involved this time, at least, that was always a good sign. “Okay. Library’s Fading Light should be-” She jumped when another loud BZZT! sounded, jolting her to full wakefulness again. “Hoo! That should be fine. Perfectly fine.” Spike binned the wrapper for his fritter. “Are you sure you’re okay, Twilight? You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to.” “I’m sure. I promised.” The singing contest was in full swing by the time Vinyl and Scootaloo arrived. Vinyl’s head was still pounding, but the wobbling had subsided, at least. “Am I late?” someone behind her asked. Apparently Rarity’s services were no longer needed for the sewing and sowing biathlon. Vinyl turned around to face the mare. “Not if you wanna hear me and Scootaloo, no. Twilight and Spike are up next, then it’s us.” Rarity smiled. “Oh, good. I wonder what they have planned for us.” Vinyl shook her head vigorously to try and stay awake. “Are you sure you’re fine, darling?” Rarity asked. “You seem to be a bit out of it.” “Nah, I’m good.” “You cheater!” A call came from behind them. “I did not cheat; the rules didn’t say anything about what song you’re allowed to sing!” came the reply. The source of the argument was a foursome of ponies, or rather a pair of duos; two big, two small, two boys, two girls, two pegasi and two Earth ponies. The bickering was between the small ones, and the grownups were more annoyed at their siblings than they were about whatever grave injustice the young ones were debating. “Oh, for pity’s sake, are you two gonna argue about this all day? Hey, Rarity,” Applejack greeted. “Vinyl.” “Hey. How’d the singing go? I missed it.” Vinyl yawned. “It went fine, I reckon. Nothin’ too fancy, just a nice little ditty to forget your sorrows to. Unfortunately, some ponies are gettin’ a mite riled up about the proceedin's.” Applejack cocked her head to the argument unfolding in her wake. “Tell me about it,” Thunderlane said, rolling his eyes. Rumble and Apple Bloom went at it, loudly. Rumble’s wings flared up and closed as he argued, Apple Bloom bared her teeth, and both children resorted to vocabulary that would have made Cheerilee proud, what with all the syllables they spent trying to describe the myriad ways in which the other pony was wrong. Scootaloo had half a mind to get in between the pair, but Vinyl had already extended a hoof to stop her. “Don’t get in the middle of that, kiddo. There’s more going on than you can see.” “How can you tell?” The girl asked. “Family business, Scootaloo,” Vinyl replied, a sad tone creeping into her voice. “Family business.” Rarity squinted when she heard that remark. What an odd thing to say. The arguing foals fell silent, though, when the referee came up the stage again. “Next contestant: Twilight Sparkle and Spike The Dragon. Up to the podium, please?” Thunderlane grumbled when he saw Twilight. “Am I the only one seeing this?” Applejack shook her head. “Nope. Twilight’s been hittin’ the books again, looks like. Face first, too; I think she got a little bit o’ ink on her snout.” “And nopony is going to say anything?” “It’s Twilight, Thunderlane,” Rarity said. “She does that sometimes, it’s nothing to worry yourself about. She knows her limits.” Vinyl didn’t bother trying to focus on that. If Twilight wanted to compete with a handicap, so much the better for Scootaloo’s chances. No, Vinyl was more concerned with another pressing question. “I wonder what she’s going to sing?” Spike gestured to the record player behind him, and a piano started playing. The hairs on Vinyl’s neck stood up when she recognised the tune. “Oh, no. That one?” Spike tapped a foot to the tune, and sang the first few lines. “You cast your shadow on the wall Do you feel tired?~“ Twilight smiled and closed her eyes as she joined in. “Another tome Another day~” “The coffee pot is all but drained Can you see in No light?~” They both seemed to synchronise their breaths for the refrain. They hit the exact moment the percussion beats and electronic tunes started. “Where are you now? Where are you now? Where are you now? Is it just too dark to see? Where are you now? In this ancient library?~” Silence, and anticipation. The crowd was hushed. “Where are you now? My blanket I cannot see I cannot see Where are you now? It’s all a dream Half-sleeping I can’t make out two from three I'm fading I'm fading So lost, I’m fading I’m fading So lost, I’m fading~” Twilight’s eyes fluttered, but another electric jolt stopped her from nodding off. No one was the wiser, except for Thunderlane, who noticed her shiver. Still, she sang with perfect clarity and sense of rhythm. “These dimming sparkles never show what I’m feeling I’m letting go, I rest my head. The pages calling out to me. I’m falling, I dread~” Spike slid over to get close to her. “Where are you now? Where are you now~?” Twilight nudged him playfully. “Under the dim and dying lights My body’s set on fire Where are you now? Where are you now~?” Another heavy silence from them as the music picked up to hit its crescendo, and they both started bobbing their heads to the tune. “Where are you now? My blanket I cannot see I cannot see Where are you now? It’s all a dream. When slumber calls and catches up to me. I’m fading I’m fading So lost, I’m fading I'm fading So lost, I'm fading~” The piano came back to full circle, wrapping the song up with the same calm melody it had started with. The crowd went wild. “Wow,” Vinyl said. “That was… surprisingly touching.” Scootaloo shivered. “Yeah. Spike’s not a bad singer.” “What do you expect?” Thunderlane said. “He’s a dragon, after all: if it’s not magical fire-breath, then it’s pure stamina. Not that hard to assume he’s got trained lungs.” Vinyl squinted at the stallion. “Something wrong, Thunderlane?” “Not with me, no. But Twilight’s still looking a bit rough. You really don’t think anything’s wrong?” Vinyl nodded and yawned. “It’s a Canterlot unicorn thing, Thunder. Lots of late nights, lots of studying. I’m sure the high-flyers in Cloudsdale get that all the time.” “Oh, I’m not from Cloudsdale, so I wouldn’t know, but… if you say so, I guess. Good luck, by the way.” “Yeah, good luck, Scootaloo,” Rumble added. “I’m sure you’ll do great.” Scootaloo suppressed a groan. Now not only was she singing in front of a crowd, but she was singing in front of the only boy she might have possibly, maybe, potentially considered asking for help in flying. If she looked bad in front of Rumble, that’d make things really awkward, but only because of the difference in skill. She absolutely did not dread talking to him because he and his brother had a reputation and she really wanted to spend some time with Rumble alone. This much, she knew for absolute certain, and no amount of prodding would convince her otherwise. At least Apple Bloom wasn’t around to do any of that annoying prodding. Applejack had disappeared, too, probably during the song. She banished that thought from her mind. Her target was Rainbow Dash. Winning here would mean Rainbow Dash had to pay attention to her, notice her, maybe adopt her as a big sister. It would all come down to this. “Ready, Scoot?” Vinyl asked. “I hope so.” “Best hoof forward, kiddo. We’ve got this.” “Twilight, are you sure you’re okay?” Thunderlane asked. “Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I -BBZT!- be?” Thunderlane took a moment, but decided not to bring up the electric shock again, as Twilight was obviously aware of how that looked. “Your face is looking a little, umm, sunken. And that song you sang just now, it sounded like you really meant it.” Twilight smiled. “It’s a very personal song, very moving. Nothing to be concerned about.” “If you say so.” “Vinyl and Scootaloo next, huh?” Spike said. “Yup.” “That’s not going to end well,” Thunderlane said. “Scootaloo’s got a terrible habit of shouting her lyrics.” The music started with an electric wub-like sound that intensified into a loud thrum. The hairs on Twilight’s neck rose up when she recognised the tune. “Oh… that no-good...” “What? What is it?” “Canterlot trick, Spike, again. Don’t you recognise that tune?” Spike kicked the air when the electric guitar riff gave it away. “Oh, that song. Of course she’s gonna do that.” “Which one is this?” Rumble asked. “The song is titled ‘The Desperate Raid on the Hen House.’ But most ponies only know it by the refrain.” Twilight grimaced in anticipation. Both Vinyl and Scootaloo were bobbing their heads and shaking their tails in true performer fashion until Vinyl did an air guitar swish with a hoof. She nodded to her niece, and Scootaloo let rip. “I! Don’t even know your name this place just looks the same the way it did befooore~” Vinyl winced at the belting Scootaloo could produce, which she’d figured out a while ago was probably genetic: Scootaloo had the strong lungs pegasi needed for flight along with the vocal chords that allowed her unicorn ancestors to shout spells at each other all day. It made matching her volume a difficult, though not impossible, task. There was nothing Vinyl could do but join in on the shouting. “Okay! You think you’ve got a sturdy base But the guards you’ve got are out of place And opened your back dooohoohoohoor!” They only had a split second to catch their breath, but they did it in perfect synch. That would be the deciding factor for the judges. Scootaloo nailed the timing. “Fox on the Run they scream and everybody comes a-runnin’ Take your hens and hide yourself away~” Scootaloo took care of the most intense part of the refrain, of course, shouting “Foxy on the ruhuuuhun!” “Fuh-foxy Fox on the Run So hide away!” Vinyl did the second verse, the one that, according to the story behind the song, would be sung by the guard dog, or guard rooster, or guard pig, depending on which version it was. In modern times, ponies didn’t care much about tradition, as long as their chickens were safe. “You! You think you can waltz in here But the last time I still nicked your ear You won’t take any more~” Scootaloo snickered, as she always did when this part came around. Vinyl nearly panicked, but no matter, the girl didn’t miss a single beat. “I! Don’t even know your name But you won’t end my reign I’ve heard this all before~” The tricky part was over. All they had to do now was coast it out and they were clear. “Fox on the Run they scream and everybody comes a-runnin’ Take your hens and hide yourself away Foxy on the ruhuuuhun! Fuh-foxy Fox on the Run So hide away!~” Vinyl Scratch was out of breath after that. The crowd applauded them, the judges nodded in appreciation. Roping contest done, singing contest done. Pounding headache coming along now. Those were the worst events down. Everything else, she could handle, take a quick nap in between, and then the race at the end would be hers. Sure, Thunderlane and Applejack might beat her by a small margin, but their siblings stood no chance against Scootaloo, least of all when they were busy arguing with each other. And in a paired race, it’s the slowest pony who determines victory. That day with Rainbow Dash was in the bag. Scootaloo’s gonna be so happy... “Looks like the score’s evened out a bit,” Spike said as Scootaloo came down from the stage. “Even if you can’t sing.” “Spike, please, don’t start a petty rivalry over this. We still have plenty of events to do,” Twilight said, before shivering as another jolt of electricity went through her to keep the sleep at bay. “Yeah, I think I’m out of tricks for now,” Vinyl joked. As much as she hated to admit it, she’d only planned for the first two contests and the very last one, as those were the only ones Scootaloo had bothered to mention. Still, they had a comfortable enough lead, Vinyl could relax now. She just needed to steal some minutes of sleep and let her stomach rest. As long as nothing upset her stomach, she’d be in the clear. Then the judges made the call for the next round. “Okay, five minutes ‘till the pie-eating contest!” “Uh oh.”