After an entirely pointless and drawn-out rock funeral, they finally set off toward the town Maine had seen earlier.
The Mane Six Joined your party!
To be honest, the fact that he had an A.I. again had completely slipped Maine’s mind. How it had somehow gotten ahold of an RPG reference was beyond him, but it did give him a name for it.
“A.I., your new designation is Merlin.”
Designation Recieved. Further Orders?
“Run diagnostics and an equipment check. Return systems to peak performance. Search backlogs for Brute Shot ammunition production. It is unlikely the native species will be able to help.”
Understood boss, I’ll get back to you when it’s done.
Maine was momentarily thrown by Merlin’s words. Normally an A.I. doesn’t develop a personality so quickly, but there have been special cases before.
“Maine? Who are you talking to?”
Maine looked down to Twilight’s puzzled expression. A quick look confirmed the others were equally as confused. Maine understood their concern, it looked as if he was talking to himself. He sighed and explained.
“Right then, get it over with. As it turns out, a regular human can’t run all the equipment in this suit by himself, so we developed a little something called artificial intelligence, or A.I. They’re incredibly complex machines built on an atomic level that take care of all the various systems this armor needs to run at peak efficiency. But in order for them to work properly, we had to include something of a self-learning system, a mind. Over time, they gradually developed personalities until they became what they are today. They’re basically their own beings. I just picked up... this one recently and hadn’t gotten around to naming him until just now... Say ‘hi’ Merlin.”
Merlin piped up with a cheery, crisp, British accent.
”Hello there! It’s nice to make your acquaintance!”
Twilight immediately magicked up her notepad again and began desperately scribbling down all the information Maine had just given her. The others reactions were more subdued, polite greetings and raised eyebrows. Pinkie, however, looked like she was about to explode. Maine promptly slowed down to put some distance between me and the ecstatic, possibly combustible mare, though that proved to be futile. She inevitably exploded in a cloud of confetti and balloons.
Save me.
“Does he like PARTIES!?”
“Touch me, and I will punch you.”
She merely smiled widely and bounced in place in front of him as she waited for an answer. Maine sighed and nodded his consent for Merlin to speak.
“Blimey! A party? I can’t say whether or not I like them, Pinkie! I didn’t even exist about five hours ago!”
Pinkie Pie gasped loudly, somehow floating off the ground in the process.
“Then it’s your BIRTHDAY AND YOUR WELCOMING PARTY!!!”
”Well would you look at that! I guess it is! I’ve never had a birthday before either!”
Pinkie’s smile looked painful at this point.
“THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BESTEST PARTY EVER!!!”
She then jumped into a random bush and promptly vanished.
Maine turned back to Twilight and the rest.
“Does she always break the laws of physics so casually?”
“Yes,” came the unanimous reply.
Twilight walked closer to him, waving her quill and paper in the air.
“Do you mind if I ask a few questions about him?”
“...Shoot.”
“What’s his learning capacity like?”f
“Massive. Greater than my mind could ever hold. Goes through millions of mathematical equations every minute just to speak.”
Twilight’s eyes... sparkled.
“Millions? C-could I get a sample of one of the more complicated ones?”
It didn’t take Maine long to come up with something to shut her up.
“Einstein’s Theory of Relativity. ‘E’ equals ‘MC’ squared.”
She frowned for a second, but then her jaw dropped and she quickly wrote the formula on her scroll.
She was out of commission for a long while as she puzzled over that particular brain-teaser.
=================================
As they continued on their way, Pinkie popped out of another bush a few minutes later and was happily bouncing along with a bit more cheer than even she usually had.
Now that they were traveling through the forest proper, it hadn’t taken Maine long to notice the worried glances the others cast into the murky surroundings, more than simple concern on their faces. His senses now on edge, Maine leaned down to Twilight and asked her what was up.
“Is there anything to be worried about out here?”
Twilight started and turned back to him with a raised eyebrow.
“Why do you ask?”
Maine huffed and took on the ‘scolding adult’ posture.
“I’m a highly-trained solider. I’ve learned to notice things like worried looks.”
She blinked in surprise before shrugging and looking forward again.
“Well, I wouldn’t worry about it too much, but the Everfree Forest has a reputation for being dangerous, mostly because of it’s wildlife.”
“Like what?”
Maine always gathered information on possible threats, no matter how unlikely they may be.
Twilight turned her eyes up into the air, thinking for a moment, before answering.
“Well, the most common ones are probably Timberwolves, carnivorous wolves made of wood and almost impossible for most to outrun. After-”
“Shouldn’t be a problem.”
She blinked, but continued.
“After that is Manticores, an amalg-“
“I actually know that one,” Maine interrupted, to Twilight’s dismay. “Back home we had legends of Manticores, even though they were just myths.”
Twilight gave him a puzzled look, but shrugged it off and continued once more.
“Then there are Cockatrices, a cross between a snake-like body with wings and a chicken’s head. If you have even a little fear of their stare, you are turned to stone.”
“So... don’t fear it?”
Twilight nodded as Maine chuckled.
“I’ve stared into the face of Death itself and didn’t flinch. I think I can bear to have a staring contest with an overgrown chicken.”
Not realizing the literal meaning in his words, Twilight scoffed at Maine’s ‘bravado.’
“Anyway... after that are hydras, dragons that if you cut off a head, three more take its pla-“
“Do they fly?”
She grunted and shook her head before opening her mouth to speak again.
“Good. Then they shouldn’t be a problem for me.”
Twilight gave him a rather pointed glare this time, making sure he was well and truly shut up this time. She continued with a notable amount frustration.
“And finally, Ursa Majo-”
“Like the constellation?” Maine asked with just a slight smirk as he interrupted her again.
She growled in frustration as Maine chuckled. The rest of the group had caught the gist of what he was doing and was littered with snickering. Years of dealing with OCD people like York and some of the A.I. had taught Maine exactly how to press all the right buttons.
Twilight took a deep breath to calm herself and looked back to the freelancer again.
“You’re actually closer than you may think. Ursa’s are massive bears literally made of stars.”
Maine stayed silent this time, genuinely interested.
“We probably won’t have to worry about them unless we get between a mother and her cub.”
“So the same as regular bears, but way bigger and made of stars?”
“Also practically indestructible, so we really don’t want to anger one.”
Maine shrugged and continued on, not saying a word to end the conversation. Twilight fumed as she stared after him ; his long strides carrying his frame to the head of the group. A smile crossed his face, though hidden by the helmet.
As he passed by Rainbow Dash, she surreptitiously raised a hoof over her shoulder in a gesture strangely similar to a high-five. After a quick check to make sure Twilight wasn’t looking, Maine quickly extended my hand and gave it a quick slap. The pegasus grinned but made no other reaction as Twilight turned to the sound and glared suspiciously at the two of them.
Maine ended up chatting with Rainbow for awhile, later being joined by Applejack on his left. Rainbow was definitely an exaggerator and a boaster, but she had a confidence that Maine could respect. She reminded him of Carolina not only with her color but her brash personality. Applejack, the southerner with a penchant for poking fun and calling bluffs, apparently had a rivalry going on with Rainbow Dash. The parallel between these two and Maine’s former teammates was surprisingly spot on. The only real difference Maine could see between his new companions and Carolina and Tex, was the fact that they were friends despite of it.
On that note, as he looked back to the rest, Maine could piece together a rather bizarre mirror of his old team.
Twilight was definitely York or Wash, Rarity was Wyoming without a doubt, Fluttershy was easily kind enough to be Florida, Texas and Carolina were so similar to Applejack and Rainbow that it was creepy, and Pinkie Pie was... you know, that one pink soldier from the red team, minus the constant innuendos.
“Hey Maine! Better brace yourself, cause we’re barging into your party later with a greased log leading the way!”
Scratch that last part. Also, what!?
The other mares looked... uncomfortable. Maine turned toward Pinkie pensively.
“...What greased log?”
“Oh, you know, silly! The kind you ride on!”
That clarified nothing and made Maine more concerned. Was he the one riding it?
“Explain that... a bit more carefully?”
Pinkie rolled her eyes and gave Maine a knowing grin.
“For log rolling, dummy!”
She’s going to be the death of me, I’m sure of it. Also, I’m actually becoming genuinely interested in this party. There’s still one thing missing to get me on board though...
“... is there alchohol?”
Pinkie laughed and bounced to his side.
“Of course! What else would I fill the log-rolling tub with!?”
And just like that, I’m in.
Maine stopped in his tracks and crouched down in front of Pinkie Pie. The rest of the group stopped and looked toward him as he spoke with all seriousness.
“Pinkie, at this moment, I don’t dislike you.”
Pinkie laughed at the somewhat dark comment before responding.
“You have to take off the helmet to drink though!”
“And the moment has now passed.”
Laughter surrounded them at hos short answer. He stood after a moment and ruffled Pinkie’s mane, though the curls snapped back a moment later. He chuckled a bit as they walked.
“That was a dirty and underhanded tactic, Pinkie Pie,” He turned back to see six smiling mares, “Good job. I didn’t think you had it in you.”
================================
The next hour was relatively uneventful, other than a large number of unidentified bogeys trailing them. Maine was well aware that the forest had gone unnaturally quiet as other animals avoided a threat. And the breaking twigs he had heard since then confirmed his suspicions.
He took a nonchalant glance back, as if he was just checking on the group, and quickly scanned the forest. Now that Maine was looking, he could easily see the half-dozen shadows stealthily making their way among the trees.
Maine calmly turned back around and resumed his walk as if nothing was wrong.
A few minutes later, a small yelp alerted him that one of the mares had seen their followers. Rarity, it sounded like.
“M-Maine? I don’t mean to alarm you-“
“I know.”
“...What?”
“Don’t react, if you’re lucky they’ll leave once we leave their territory. Act like nothing is wrong.”
Twilight was amazed, Maine, despite being at the front of the group, had already seen and planned against the Timberwolves behind them. It was suddenly glaringly obvious to her he was a soldier.
Worried chatter was passed around as the group attempted to act normally. Pinkie just kept up her usual chatter and bouncing while the rest of them had to work to keep up appearances. Even still...
“You lot are awful at acting. I think a rock could act better than you... no offense Pinkie.”
“None taken!”
The group did manage to continue for awhile longer without incident, but that peace was shattered with a loud growl.
The girls and Maine turned as Timberwolves began emerging from the flora around them.
Twilight looked back toward Maine’s rather nonchalant stance as he looked over his shoulder rather than bother with fully turning around.
She looked back and gasped. A wolf was barely ten feet away from her with its teeth bared and its legs ready to pounce.
It froze as she locked eyes with it. Twilight shook uncontrollably as if the hungry gaze was already devouring her. Neither of them moved, not daring to until the other looked away. After what seemed like hours to Twilight, her nerves finally forced her to take a step back, and that was all the Timberwolf needed.
A moment later, it was in the air, teeth ready to end her life.
That same moment, several things happened all at once. A scream escaped Twilight’s mouth, a loud crack like thunder roared through the air, the Timberwolf’s body suddenly fell to the ground, and finally, the missing half of its head fell a moment later in the form of splinters.
She turned in awe to see Maine holding a smoking silver pistol in his hand formerly attached to hos leg an instant before.
He calmly placed it back into the holster and walked forward past her. He looked her over for a brief moment and nodded as he placed himself between these ponies under his unofficial protection and the wolves.
Maine raised his hand and extended two fingers before flicking them back, giving the universal ‘come and get me.’
The wolves snarled and began circling him.
Maine calmly stood in the rapidly shrinking circle of wolves, no concern evident.
With a growl, a wolf suddenly launched itself at his back. Maine simply stepped aside without bothering to look toward the assailant as he delivered a bone-shattering punch to the mid-air wolf, practically breaking it in half as it spiraled off into the trees.
As another leaped forward, he pivoted neatly on his heel and punted it into a nearby tree, shattering both.
Maine’s body turned horizontal as he retracted his outstretched foot and postponed his leg behind himself, forcing the head of the approaching wolf into its own body. It collapsed a moment later.
Quickly righting himself, He walked toward the three-wolf rush in front of him. With a left hook, Maine snapped the first’s neck and sent its body sliding into the second. A powerful haymaker sent the third into the dirt, it’s already limited cranial cavity significantly reduced. He turned and raised both fists in the air and slammed them down on the one struggling under its slain companion, flattening them both.
He immediately pulled an explosive backflip over his next assailant’s head and broke its spine as he landed. He flattened the paralyzed creature’s skull with a follow-up stomp for good measure before turning to his last opponent.
A Timberwolf about twice the size of his brethren glared at Maine over a heavily scarred muzzle and snarled ferociously.
Two can play the intimidation game, pup.
Maine planted his feet, sucked in an incredible amount of air, and roared. The ground seemed to shake slightly as he bellowed his anger.
The huge Timberwolf actually cowered for a brief moment at the display before baring its teeth again.
Two seasoned combatants circled each other, searching in vain for an opening. The Law of the Everfree on one side, the massive Combat Training of Project Freelancer on the other.
Finally they stopped, the mares on Maine’s left watching with baited breaths. The Alpha ground its feet into the ground and launched itself forward. Maine took two long steps forward and raised his hand, winding up for another pile driver. The wolf corrected itself ever so slightly as it charged, something another animal wouldn’t notice. Maine was no such animal.
At the last possible second, Maine scooped low, meeting what would have been a successful dodge with his forearm. Using its own momentum, Maine hooked his arm around its chest, lifted it into the air and slammed it onto its back. Quickly extracting himself from the dazed wolf, Maine stood and reared back for a powerful kick.
Twilight, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Rarity, Applejack, and Pinkie Pie were not entirely sure what had just transpired. All they had seen was that one moment the wolf had a head, the next, it did not.
Rainbow looked up for a possibly flying head, but all she spotted was a newly-formed hole in a low cloud.
“Sweet Celestia...”
Maine was rather proud of himself, fairly certain he had punted that head at least a few miles despite it going more up than forward.
He turned to see the group staring at the sky in awe. He cracked up laughing at their awed expressions and broke them out of their stupor. In a heartbeat, Rainbow was in his face, a wide grin threatening to split her head.
“That. Was. AWESOME!!! You have to teach me how to do that flippy-thingy! And the rest of those rad moves!”
Maine pushed her away with a finger on her nose, her face scrunching up and her eyes crossing to stare at the intruding digit.
Maine found it strangely cute for some reason.
“Princess first, then we’ll see.”
She blinked twice as he released her nose and nodded. Maine turned to Twilight and dusted off his hands.
“As fun as that was, I like the idea of spending the night here. Shall we go?”
Twilight looked up from the notes she was scribbling.
“Huh? Oh, yeah. Uhh... Ponyville is basically a ten-minute walk from this point.”
Maine grinned and waved his hand in a grand gesture to the trees behind her.
“Lead the way, Sparkle.”