//------------------------------// // Chapter 5 // Story: Backed Up Feelings // by Star Reacher //------------------------------// Pain. Everything was pain. Sharp bolts of agony rushed through Fluttershy’s entire body, arresting her every sensation and eliminating all thought of anything save the chance of release. As she bucked and thrashed in the swirling maelstrom, a voice broke through the haze. The words were incomprehensible, but in her state its mere presence was a piece of driftwood in a storm. She threw all her hope upon the voice, desperate for any source of hope that she might escape her torture. The following moments were unbearable, as she lay there silently pleading for the voice to deliver on its unspoken promise. In a single instant, the pain swelled to heights that far eclipsed all her previous torment, before disappearing. In its place was a warm, comforting lavender. Choking back sobs of relief at her release, she basked in the light’s loving embrace. Slowly, the lavender field coalesced into an amorphous shape before her, and began to pull away. She panicked, and though her exhaustion began to babble for it to remain nearby, to not leave her alone. Whatever she managed to stammer out seemed to work, as the color drew next to her. Acting on instinct, she drew it into a deep embrace, her fright and pain slowly ebbing away as she drifted away into a warm, dreamless slumber. ************************************************************************************* Fluttershy groaned as she began to struggle back to wakefulness. Every square centimeter of her body was stiff, from her hooves to her primaries. Moving anything took a supreme amount of exertion, and she was having trouble convincing herself that opening her eyes would be worth the effort. For the moment, she was content to simply lie there and enjoy the unusually warm bed. That changed as she slowly registered the rhythmic expansion and contraction of whatever she was embracing. Finally realizing that she was clinging tightly to another pony, her eyes flew open, the exhausted muscles stinging with the exertion. Panic briefly swept through her, before the sight of a familiar face calmed her nerves. Oh. It’s only Twilight. Wait, why isn’t that surprising? She wondered. With no immediately obvious explanation, she began trying to piece together her memories of what had occurred the previous night. I was laying here reading. And… the air began to get cool and moist. Her eyes stole to the window. That’s right. There was fog coming in through the window. She remembered deciding to close the window, but waiting until she finished her current page. She had noticed a stray wisp of vapor stealing closer. And then… And then… she couldn’t remember. It was like a wall slamming down in her memory. She could remember pain, and light, and then waking up. Intent on remembering, she hammered away at the wall in her mind, chasing any trails of thought that might help to undermine it. Slowly but surely, she managed to piece together the events surrounding her outburst. She realized that, somehow, she’d had a major magical outburst. It had almost overwhelmed her, but Twilight had been there. Twilight had protected her, saved her, and comforted her as she fell asleep. Wait. So that dream was real? And that lavender light. It had been… Twilight? Fluttershy’s cheeks inflamed at the realization, the possibly romantic implications of her reactions last night not lost on her. It was just the exhaustion speaking. Yeah, that’s all it was. That’s not it. Oh, horsefeathers. She was arguing with herself again. And judging by the tone, she wasn’t going to be able to run away for long. Ok, so maybe it hadn’t just been the exhaustion. But, she couldn’t just assume that what she’d felt was love. She’d probably just confused the feelings of panic and relief for something else. That’s not true. Of course it is! It’s not like she’d ever felt this way before. You’re lying. No, she wasn’t! You can’t fool yourself. Ok, fine, so maybe she had noticed some… fuzzy feelings towards Twilight in the past, especially over the past couple of weeks. Twilight was an amazing friend, and it was only natural for her to feel comfortable and happy around her friends. Not all of them. Wait, what? She’s different. Twilight was… different? What could that mean? You feel more at ease around her. She… couldn’t exactly deny that statement. But neither could she confirm it. She had simply never given the matter any thought. More comfortable around Twilight? Maybe the voice was right on that point… You see? No, no, no. That couldn’t be. There was no way Twilight was that special to her. Don’t deny what you already know. Oh… fine. The more the thoughts turned over in her head, with Twilight innocently snoring right before her eyes, the less she could deny the truth. So she might have a crush on Twilight. So what? It’s not like anything would ever come of it. Better to just forget the whole thing and enjoy being friends. No. No? What did she mean no? That’s not enough, Fluttershy. It was. It definitely was. She couldn’t even tell if what she felt was real, or just a case of hero worship. Besides, there was no way Twilight would ever go for it. Why not? Well… she just wouldn’t. Fluttershy herself didn’t much care one way or the other, but who knew if Twilight even liked mares that way? She’d never mentioned anything. Odds were Fluttershy’s chances were dead on takeoff. You don’t know that. Well, no, but what did it matter? Besides, this was her they were talking about. Meek, plain, boring old Fluttershy. There’s no way somepony as amazing as Twilight would ever think of her that way. Amazing? Fluttershy felt her blush grow even deeper as she processed her choice in words. Before she could resume her self-argument, Twilight let out an adorable little sigh, utterly derailing her train of thought. Fluttershy couldn’t help admiring the alicorn before her. Her beautiful mane, her full lashes, her long, exquisite horn. Her horn… Fluttershy’s eyes were drawn to the magical growth, slowly finding their way down the length to its base. She remembered something from her stories: for unicorns, a kiss at the base of the horn was a sign of deep thanks and affection. She certainly had a great deal to be thankful for after last night. Slowly, almost without realizing it, Fluttershy drew forward toward the space below Twilight’s horn. This is just a sign of thanks. Nothing more she assured herself. However, her rising heartbeat and shortness of breath disavowed her assertion, the overwhelming feelings growing stronger the closer she drew. As her lips slowly grazed the base of Twilight’s horn, she nearly swooned at the sudden surge of emotion. ************************************************************************************* Starlight yawned lightly. Thank Celestia that was finished. She knew it was important, but 8 hours of staring into fog would numb anyone’s mind. At least the fire had mostly burned itself out. She was ready to go home, find her bed, and collapse. An abrupt shift of wind brought with it an odd, acrid odor. She couldn’t quite place it. Charred lichen and stone, maybe? What on earth could make that kind of smell? Temporarily reenergized by her curiosity, Starlight set to solving the conundrum. A nearby weathervane told her that the wind was coming from the north, past the castle. Well, that’s convenient. No need to change course. Resuming her path, she stayed alert for any more signs of the smell. It seemed she would be disappointed as the castle came into view. Sighing in disappointment, she decided that rest was the more important consideration at the moment. However, she noticed an odd lack of color in the familiar scene. It took some time to place, but finally she realized what it was: parts of the castle seemed to be silhouetted against a black background. What in Equestria? Trotting around the side of castle, she was brought to a halt by the sight before. Etched into the closest mountain was a stark, black scar. Located above the snow line, it looked like the snow and rock had been melted away and charred. Whatever had happened had involved an absolutely massive outpouring of energy, and with a mounting feeling of panic, Starlight realized what the source must have been. Fluttershy! Starlight teleported as near to the room as she could, her aim thrown off slightly by worry. Galloping the rest of the way, she threw open the bedroom door, desperate to make sure her friends were alright. Whatever she had been expecting, it most certainly wasn’t what awaited her. There lay Twilight and Fluttershy. In Bed. Together. With Fluttershy’s lips in the crook of Twilight’s horn. What. The two mares froze, their eyes locked together in shock. Fluttershy awkwardly detached her lips, maintaining the shocked eye-lock with Starlight. The seconds dragged by, neither willing to break the increasingly stifling silence. Salvation came in the form of a yawn. Disturbed by the door, Twilight slowly began to claw her way back to consciousness. Starlight watched as she let out another yawn, opened her eyes, and glanced around sleepily. She appeared confused at the pink mane covering her face, scrunching her eyes in confusion. As soon as she processed that it was Fluttershy she was pressed against, she jumped up with a startled yelp before disappearing in a flash of light. Taking advantage of the break in silence, Starlight managed to sputter out, “Fluttershy? What were you…? I mean you were kissing her!’ “I don’t know! I was just… I mean she was so… I’m sorry Starlight!” Twilight chose that moment to rematerialize. Wherever she had teleported to, it had left the right side of her mane soaked and the left side smoking. Starlight decided to drop the subject for now, but she had a suspicion she planned to explore in full as soon. “Fluttershy! Are you okay?! I’m sorry, I should have checked last night.” Twilight began to quickly check her patient, examining her features and ensuring that everything was working right. “I was just so exhausted after that overload last night. Now, follow my hoof with your eyes.” Satisfied that there wasn’t any major physical damage, Twilight let out a relieved sigh. “Thank Celestia, it looks like I managed to shunt the magic in time. Are you very sore?” Fluttershy let out a timid nod. “I’m not surprised. Even with my help, that was orders of magnitudes beyond what you’re used to. If you get plenty of rest and do some basic physical therapy, you should loosen up soon.” Twilight’s examinations came to an abrupt halt, her eyes lighting up with sudden realization. She disappeared in another flash of light, before reappearing holding a familiar gem-embedded wooden box. Without pausing to explain, she held the box up to Fluttershy’s side and watched the gems light up. The colors slowly lit up, finally stopping after green. Twilight let out a delighted squeal, before catching herself with a sheepish look. “Er... sorry about that. But I have great news Fluttershy! Last night burned through most of your built-up energy, you should be safe to go home after a about a week’s worth of sessions! Wait right there, I need to go make some notes!” Swept up in her excitement, Twilight left the room for a third time, this time by door. After a few seconds of post-twilight-mania recovery, Starlight turned back to Fluttershy. “So, now that we have some time, what exactly was all that earlier?” “I… I’m not really sure. Just, with everything that’s happened, and Twilight right there, I just sort of moved without thinking.” Wait, could it be that she…? “Wait, Fluttershy, do you like Twilight?” “What? No! No! Of course not!” Faced with a skeptical glance from Starlight, she backed down slightly. “At least I don’t think so. We’re just friends, right?” “Uh, kissing a Unicorn there isn’t really a “friend” thing to do. Are you sure that’s all there is to it?” “I… I don’t know. Maybe it’s just all the stress lately, but I’ve been thinking about her a lot lately. I’m scared because I can’t stop, but I’m happy whenever she’s nearby. I don’t know what I’m feeling.” “Fluttershy, that sounds like love.” The yellow mare looked away in embarrassment, before quietly squeaking out “Maybe you’re right.” Starlight cheered internally. Yes! I knew there was something there! Fluttershy swung back to her, panic writ large on her face. “Starlight! Please! You have to promise me something!” Oh no. No no no no no. NO! “Please, you can’t tell Twilight! Not a word!” Aaaaargh! “What? But why not?! I’m sure it’ll be fine Fluttershy!” “Starlight I’m begging you! There’s so much going on, and I don’t even know what I’m feeling. Besides, even if I do have a crush on her, there’s no way somepony like Twilight would ever be interested in a mare like me. Please!” YOU’RE WRONG! She wailed to herself. Her refusal to break her promise to Twilight dueled with her desire to just tell Fluttershy everything right now. Finally accepting that she couldn’t break her promise, she surrendered, “Alright, fine. I won’t tell her.” She turned to leave the room, “But Fluttershy, I’m telling you this as a friend: tell Twilight how you feel. If you don’t you’ll always regret it.” Any further discussion was preempted by the sudden appearance of Spike. The small dragon came tearing into the room, a look of panic on his face. “Fluttershy! Are you okay? There’s a huge blast mark on the mountain!” Starlight sprang into action, deciding that Fluttershy needed time to rest and sort things out. “She’s fine, Spike. I’ll explain everything, but let’s talk in the library. Fluttershy needs to get some rest.” She turned back to the sheepish patient, adding “Remember what I said, ” before closing the door.