It was still dark out when Apple Bloom arose before Celestia’s lazy sun. She was awake, after all, so it must have been morning. And, morning meant two things: one, it was playtime; and two, it was the day she and Sweetie Belle would be watching the Wonderbolts airshow with Scootaloo.
While Apple Bloom had never seen the Wonderbolts, Scootaloo had been excitedly talking about them for days now. And, if she had that much enthusiasm about them, then they had to be amazing. After all, the small orange filly hadn’t stopped talking about it the whole time she, Apple Bloom, and Sweetie Belle had spent at Sweetie Belle’s house.
With an eager giggle, she pulled the string on the light by her bed and bathed the room in a much-needed commodity: light. With the room now illuminated, she jumped off of the bed and looked over the small lake of toys on her floor. While several things looked amusing, she decided to play with her toy hammer and the pegboard.
Giddily she giggled to herself, as she drove the small multicolored pegs of wood into the pegboard. She loved the pegboard. It allowed her to pretend that she was building things like her mom, or her uncle, Big Mac. Someday, she wanted to be able to repair things around the farm like her uncle. She was going to be a -- whatever they called a pony who worked on a farm and repaired stuff on it.
Minutes seemed to pass before Apple Bloom heard her door fly open. “Apple Bloom, it’s the middle of the night,” A frazzled looking Applejack groaned as she stood in the doorway, and looked sternly down on Apple Bloom. “Go back to bed.”
“No it ain’t,” Apple Bloom objected. “It’s already day out,” she insisted as she pointed to the barely blue sky that was just started turning from darkness to light as Celestia raised her sun slowly in the east.
“Well, the sun’s getting up now… So, Ah guess it’s time to get up anyway,” Applejack conceded with a disappointed shake of her head. “Come on Apple Bloom. You cain help me make breakfast,” Applejack consented with a smile as she beckoned Apple Bloom to follow her with a wave of her hoof.
Eagerly Apple Bloom followed Applejack as she walked down the stairs to the kitchen. The little filly’s mind was filled with so much curiosity. What were the Wonderbolts like? How could she help Applejack? But, she was a patient filly… She managed to wait thirty whole seconds before asking Applejack the first question on her mind.
“Mommy, are the Wonderbolts really good?” she chipperly asked Applejack.
“Darn tootin’ they’re good. They’re the among best fliers in Equestria,” Applejack boasted as she gave Apple Bloom a huge grin. “‘Course Ah don’t know much about that. Ah’ve always been a big fan of the rodeo,” Applejack admitted as she whimsically remembered the days when she had graced the rodeo circuit herself. “Ah even competed in some myself,” Applejack added before she quickly felt a sullen sigh building up in the back of her throat.
Applejack missed the days when she used to grace the rodeo stage. She missed the days where she felt like she was the best athlete in Ponyville. Unfortunately, she’d been out of the rodeo circuit for five whole years. And, it had been such a struggle to get back into shape -- so much so that Applejack couldn’t help but feel the burning doubt that she would be lucky to make a bronze ribbon nowadays.
“What’s the rodeo?” Apple Bloom asked innocently. Applejack’s mouth hung so low that it practically looked like it was about to fall off. “Ah never told you about the rodeo?” Applejack asked with a stunned silence accentuating the question.
Apple Bloom simply blinked a couple of time, and then asked, “Mommy, could you tell me about the rodeo?” she asked innocently.
“Can do Apple Bloom,” Applejack offered as she waved a foreleg in an exaggerated gesture for Apple Bloom to follow her. “I’ll do better than tell you. Ah’m gonna show you,” Applejack added as the pair trudged back up the stairs until they reached a specific closet.
“Now, let me get my ribbons, and the rodeo album out’a the memories closet here,” Applejack explained, only to be interrupted as Apple Bloom’s quivering body gripped onto Applejack’s leg, and began to hide behind it.
“Don’t open that closet, mommy. The monster is in there,” Apple Bloom quivered.
“What are you talkin’ about Bloom?” Applejack puzzled as she craned her head down to look between her forelegs, and at her right hind leg -- which Apple Bloom had in a death grip.
“There’s a monster in there, and it’ll eat you!” Apple Bloom panicked, despite Applejack’s best efforts to contort herself in some way that allowed her to reach the terrified filly. “Don’t let it swallow you!” she continued to babble.
“Come on Apple Bloom, don’t be scared. There ain’t no monster in our memories closet,” Applejack tried before she finally gave up. About that time, Granny Smith had come out to see what all of the fuss was about.
“What’s all this yellin’ about?” Granny Smith grumbled as she slowly walked down the hall towards the two ponies.
“Apple Bloom’s afraid of the memories closet,” Applejack explained, earning a knowing nod from Granny Smith.
“She’s not old enough for most of that stuff anyway,” Granny Smith explained with a shrug. “It’ll just confuse her. You should just grab the stuff you want out, and meet us downstairs,” Granny Smith added as she walked over, and carefully pried Apple Bloom from Applejack’s leg. “Come on Apple Bloom. Let’s go make some breakfast. And, don’t you go worryin’ about your mom, it’s gonna take more than a coupl’a goblins to eat good old Applejack,” Granny Smith offered with a hearty cackle as she carefully loaded Apple Bloom onto her walker, and slowly pushed herself towards the stairwell.
Foals really do worry about some silly things, Applejack considered with a shrug of her withers. Carefully she pulled out the items she needed from the memories closet and closed it behind her.
Thankfully, Apple Bloom had completely forgotten about her panic attack by breakfast and instead had promptly worked herself into an excited frenzy by the time they had made it to the Wonderbolt’s airshow. Though the filly had, thankfully, managed to exhaust a large supply of her energy by the time the show was over.
Now, she was skipping along with the rest of Applejack’s friends at about half of her previous energy. However, Applejack couldn’t enjoy it as much. Instead, she sat there trying to figure out what mystery prize she had won from the Wonderbolt’s. Carefully Applejack pulled the small prize card out of her hat and began to look at the writing written on it.
“Wow, Applejack, you won the free dinner with Soarin’,” Rainbow Dash shouted into Applejack’s ear, causing her to hop a small distance into the air in surprise. “You are so lucky,” Rainbow Dash added as she squeezed her cheeks with her hooves.
“This here’s a dinner ticket?” Applejack asked as she rubbed her ringing ears, and squinted harder at the small offending slip of paper.
“Yeah, it’s probably the closet you can get to a date with him. That stallion always plays hard to get,” Rainbow Dash grumbled as she puffed her cheeks, and looked down at her hooves.
“Huh, well that’s interestin’,” Applejack mumbled as her mind slowly considered whether she even wanted to go on a date -- even if it wasn’t actually a date, per say -- with a Wonderbolt. It wasn’t that she wasn’t into stallions, dating, or fancy dinners. But, she just didn’t feel like they’d have anything in common. She was a farm mare, whose number one priority was family, and number two was farming. He was a hotshot pegasus, whose number one priority was being the best flier. It just didn’t seem like their relationship would fly -- for lack of a better phrase.
While Applejack pondered, the conversation drifted away from her ticket, and to Rainbow Dash’s performance. Of course, Applejack would throw out a compliment, or a comment here or there. But, her main train of thought was really on the best way to back out of this “date”. And then…. everypony wanted to talk about it. And no matter how hard Applejack tried to end it, it just wouldn’t die. Then Rarity decided to butt in…
“Just let it go Rainbow Dash,” Rarity stated sternly. “If she doesn’t want to go, she won’t go. Anyway, I have a couple of things to talk to Granny Smith about before I drop Sweetie Belle off,” Rarity added as she made a beeline down a second path.
“Rarity, what are you up to?” Applejack called out as she watched Rarity migrate towards Sweet Apple Acres, and galloped off to catch the white mare.
Quickly Applejack galloped after the white mare. “Rarity, I don’t want you getting involved in my pers...” Applejack started as she was within grabbing range of Rarity, only to watch her disappear in a flash of light, and a puff smoke. “Hey now! Teleporting ain’t fair!” Applejack objected with a huff. Try as she might, Applejack couldn’t seem to find Rarity anywhere along the trail back to Sweet Apple Acres. It seemed, Rarity had gotten pretty good since Twilight had shown her that spell.
Applejack stormed into the house and made a point of searching it high and low for Rarity. “Rarity, where are yeh at?!” Applejack shouted as she turned the whole farmhouse upside down… Meanwhile, Apple Bloom couldn’t help but laugh and laugh, as she saw the whole event as one giant case of tag, and hide and seek. Eagerly she would shout suggested search locations into Applejack’s ears.
Applejack finally found the mare talking to Granny Smith in the kitchen. “Rarity, what are yeh up to?” Applejack grumbled as she stormed over to look the white mare in the face.
“She was here tellin’ me how you ain’t gonna meet that stallion, Soarin’,” Granny Smith shouted as she waved a hoof with a faint agitation. “Now you know Bloom needs a pah. But, you won’t find her one if you don’t go out and meet ponies,” Granny Smith continued as she gave Applejack a reprimanding gaze.
“Granny, Ah got way too much work to do for that. Ah got a ton of chores to do,” Applejack objected. However, Granny Smith seemed unfazed by Applejack’s argument.
“Don’t you give me that. You ain’t gonna be gone longer than an hour, an’ the chores ain’t goin’ nowhere!” Granny Smith chastised. “So, Ah’m ordering you to go down there and eat with that stallion. And, don’t come back till your dinner is done, you here!” Granny Smith ordered.
“But, who’s gonna watch, Bloom?” Applejack insisted as she struggled to find some way out of this situation.
“Well darling, I seem to recall that Rainbow Dash offered to foalsit,” Rarity said behind a rather unladylike smirk. “It seems to me that you could drop her off, and then be back before dinner,” Rarity tittered.
“See, so git over there, and drop Bloom off,” Granny Smith ordered.
Applejack’s tail, ears, and head drooped as she realized she’d lost the argument. However, she couldn’t help but shoot Rarity a furious look on the way out. She would get revenge one of these days.
Applejack grumpily tore a chunk off of one of the complimentary slices of bread. She was furious with Rarity, and Granny Smith for lassoing her into this. She was too busy to date stallions at the moment. In a way, the farm was her husband, and Apple Bloom was her life.
Enigmatically, Applejack also felt nervous. Once again, she couldn’t help but feel like there wasn’t any way in Tartarus this date couldn’t end badly. And, strangely the thought of a bad date hurt… This ain’t even a date. It’s a marketing stunt, Applejack chastised herself.
Applejack continued to huff as she absent mindedly ran one of her hooves down the green train of her gala dress -- It wasn’t like she was trying to straighten any wrinkles out of either… Really. Why am Ah even dressed like this, anyway? It ain’t like this is some kind’a fancy event, Applejack mentally grumbled. Her statement feeling empty before she even thought it, as she quickly noticed every stallion, and mare decked in their finest attire. Of course, the name of the restaurant could also have been a statement to the contrary: Fantaisie.
“Woohee… Maybe this is a might fancy?” Applejack mumbled with a nervous whistle as she blotted her forehead with the cloth napkin that previous had sat on the table in front of her. Suddenly, her previous anger had drowned with the onset of this sudden wave of self-consciousness.
“Yeah, somepony in marketing must have overdone it again,” whispered a male voice. Applejack couldn’t help but flinch at the new voice. Once Applejack had managed to slide her decorative saddle back into place and removed the stetson from her eyes, she managed to see the stallion in question. It was a light grey pegasus stallion, with a dark blue mane and the goofiest smirk on his face that Applejack had ever seen… Her ‘date’ had arrived. “Either that or somepony in high places owes old-stallion Milburn a favor again,” Soarin’ continued his conspiratorial whisper as he sat on the pillow, which sat comfortably on the floor across the table from Applejack.
Applejack couldn’t help but chuckle at that. “Yeah, that kinda figures,” Applejack conceded as her laughter slowly cooled down. “The names, Applejack. And, it’s mighty nice to meet you, Soarin’,” Applejack offered as she reached both of her forelegs out to offer the gray stallion a hoof shake.
“Good to meet you too, Applejack,” Soarin’ agreed as he reached both forelegs out, to match Applejack’s massive hoofshake. Once that was over, the stallion casually reached out for one of the menus on the table, and began to read it intently.
Unfortunately, Applejack had already decided upon an item, minutes ago. Now, she had nothing to do, but sit still and listen to the sound of silence. It was about this point that Applejack remembered one reason she hated idleness. There wasn’t anything but the skin-prickling, ear-itching, and icy-cold sound of silence to the room. Everypony was too busy with what they were doing, to notice that she had nothing to do. Well, now what? Applejack mentally asked herself. That wasn’t to say she couldn’t stay idle for a bit, but if the whole evening was going to be silent like this, she was going to go crazy to the sound of Soarin’ chewing his food.
Therefore, it was about the time that the waiter had grabbed the menus that Applejack decided to try to break the ice. “So… urrr… what do you do for fun?” Applejack asked -- as casually as she could -- as Soarin’ slowly lowered his menu.
Soarin’ waited there for a moment or two. Finally, he raised a foreleg and began to rub his mane. “You know, that’s actually a good question,” Soarin’ admitted as he continued to rub his mane, and give Applejack the most puzzled look possible. “I don’t tend to get a lot of free time. I pretty much give all my time to the Wonderbolts,” Soarin’ submitted before he went silent as he kicked his mind into full gear to consider the question.
“Yeah, Ah got the same thing. Ah pretty much spend my whole day tendin’ the family farm, and raisin’ my daughter,” Applejack admitted with a weak chuckle as she continued to watch Soarin’ slave over her first icebreaker. Ah think Ah just made my problem worse, Applejack mused as she slapped her foreleg with one of her hooves -- thankfully she had remembered to remove her cowboy boots from her forehooves when she sat down to eat.
Silently Applejack wished she’d brought something to entertain herself with. But, both Rarity and Granny Smith had vehemently forbidden her from taking anything with her, other than the meal ticket. The awkward clinking and talking going on at other tables, only helped Applejack to notice the methodical, and even malicious ticking of the large wall clock up against one of the walls.
JUMPING HORNY TOADS! DID THAT CLOCK TICK BACKWARDS?!
Applejack nearly jumped out of her skin before she rubbed her eyes, and gave the clock another scrutinizing gaze… No, it, in fact, was moving forwards in time, and at an oddly methodical, and slow pace. With that Applejack attempted to get the conversation started a second time, “So… ummm…. Where did you grow up?”
“Hmmm?” Soarin’ mumbled as his trance seemed to break. “Oh...” Soarin’ continued to struggle as a large blush grew on his cheeks. “Well, that’s a reasonable question,” he finally acknowledged, although Applejack could see how awkward the question was to him now. “I grew up at the Wonderbolts’ academy. They turned my life around when I pretty much troublemakered -- troublemade? -- my way out of every orphanage that tried to care for me,” Soarin’ admitted with a blush.
“Sorry, Ah asked,” Applejack mumbled with a huge blush on her face. Again, the room went silent, but Applejack wondered if it was because Soarin’ now thought she wanted the quiet. This only made the quiet twice as awkward as before. Because this time, Applejack couldn’t help but feel like she deserved it.
“So you like any books or pieces of art?” Applejack tried one final time when the crippling silence had reached the point of driving her completely insane.
“The Legend of the Mighty Rockhoof!” Soarin’ answered without a moment’s hesitation -- it seemed Applejack had finally found an easy question for the stallion to answer. “I mean, what isn’t more amazing than a stallion that gives his all for his family, and then gets buff for his sacrifice?” Soarin’ contributed with a huge, and fawning smile. His eyes actually sparkled at this.
For once, Applejack was speechless… She wasn’t sure if it was a pegasus that didn’t answer “Flash Magnus,” or if it was that Soarin’s answer sounded a lot of ways like her own. Perhaps it was because of being flustered, but this time Applejack was the one holding up the conversation as she sat at the table boggling over how she could keep the conversation going…
“Ah knew Ah should’a let Rainbow Dash take this date,” Applejack finally moaned as her head hit the table. “She and you would’a hit it off… not messed it up like me,” Applejack mumbled as she silently pounded her head against the table.
“No, we wouldn’t have,” Soarin’ asserted softly with a sympathetic tone. “As a member of the ‘bolts, Rainbow Dash is like a sister to me. So dating her would have been really, reeeeaaaaalllllllyyyyy, REEEAAAAALLLLY awkward for me,” Soarin’ countered before craned his neck out, and whispered into Applejack’s ear, “you know: trying too hard just leads to stage fright? Just let it all go, and just enjoy the food,” Soarin’ counseled before he casually sat backwards on his cushion, and grabbed a pie off of a passing waiter’s dessert cart.
For the second time, Applejack couldn’t help but laugh. This time, embarrassment was written clearly on her face. “You got me dead to rights… Ah don’t even know why Ah wanted it perfect, you know? It ain’t like we know each other. But, Ah just couldn’t take the silence, Ah guess,” Applejack mussed as her body noticeably relaxed, sending a foreleg crashing onto the side of the table, which immediately tipped it sideways. The table then launched Soarin’s pie across the room to slam into the face of a dark pink earth pony with a two-tone purple mane, green eyes, and diamond ring cutie mark.
Even before Applejack could get up and apologize, the snobbish pink pony had already stormed over to the table. “How dare you!” is all she said. But, the way she said it spoke volumes. Her words were slow and methodical, carrying the weight of 1,000 curses.
“Ah’m terribly sorry about that,” Applejack apologized with her best smile and manners. “Here, let me make fix that right up,” Applejack offered as she grabbed one of the cloth napkins from the table, and feverishly bathed it in her water glass. She then reached up with the soaking cloth to try to help clean the smeared crust and apple pieces off of the pink mare’s fine dress.
“Don’t touch me you… you… redneck!” she furious spat as she swatted Applejacks hoof away, with enough force to cause the orange mare to flinch.
“Well now, there ain’t no need to get unneighborly,” Applejack said softly with as much grace as she could… Even though she would rather be shouting that.
“Where’s the manager! Tell them that Spoiled Rich, herself, demands these country bumpkins be removed from my sight ASAP!” She shorted.
“Now honey, you’re making a scene,” warned a third voice, one Applejack was sure she should recognize but wasn’t able to place at the moment -- mostly because it was her turn to see red.
“Who are you calling a country bumpkin!” Applejack growled threateningly.
“You. I thought that was clear enough,” the mare said matter of factly as her wish for management was being answered by a stallion in an Armani suit, and two rather large looking bouncers. “Since you are slow. How about this then: I’m talking to the dirty whorse with the bastard foal that’s standing right here in front of --” Spoiled pressed, despite the warning signs, and the frantic shushing of her currently unseen husband -- who Soarin’ suspected might have dove shrewdly under one of the tables for safety.
“I’ll show you who’s dirty!” Applejack growled as she suddenly tackled the pink mare to the floor. The sudden outburst, managing to catch everypony by surprise, who then seemed to watch the scene with a look of both morbid horror, and morbid curiosity. The only one who didn’t look like a pony watching a train wreck was Soarin’ -- who seemed to be pretty impressed watching Applejack manage to pin Spoiled Rich in the most impressive stranglehold he’d seen since Mystery Mare took on The Funeral Director at the Manehatten Gardens arena. That wasn’t to say the slender pink mare wasn’t trying though, some of those kicks and bites looked fairly painful, but….
As the smoke cleared, Applejack stood shakily on her hooves with long puffs of smoke exiting her nostrils. Her opponent, on the other hoof, lay in the most uncomfortable looking pretzel on the floor.
“Uhh…. We probably should run,” Soarin’ counseled Applejack as he dumped a bunch of bits on the table, grabbed Applejack by the hoof, and dragged her a bit towards the back door of the bistro.
One could watch the twisted look of anger, and victory wash off of Applejack’s face and get replaced by a dawning look of horror as she noticed what she’d just succeeded in doing. “Probably should git before Mr. Armani over there recovers from his shock,” Applejack conceded with a horrified look still painted on her face.
Frantically Soarin’ nodded. With that, the two ponies jumped to a sprint so fast that they left behind two identical looking silhouettes of dust, which then quickly faded away as the dust cleared. It was about this time that Mr. Armani woke up. “Cement Shoes! NO! WORSE! Lawsuits!” he shouted with a point of his hoof towards the doorway.
Thankfully the two ponies were significantly faster than the two goons chasing them. The only problem lay with Applejack’s dress, which managed to trip her right at the threshold of the restaurant. The treacherous clothing managing to rip off and become tangled in her hind legs. “Shoot!” Applejack shouted.
Hastily Soarin’ doubled back and ripped the clothing further apart to free Applejack’s legs from the clothing. “We probably need to keep going until we got more space,” Soarin’ frantically pointed out as he helped Applejack to her feet, and started running with/dragging Applejack by one of her forelegs.
Once the two ponies were a way down the road did Soarin’ stop, and let himself catch his breath. “We better lay low for a few days until Mr. Armani calms down,” Soarin’ pointed out between shuddering breaths. “I know the guy… He’ll get over it, eventually,” Soarin added before he nervously shook his head. “But, he’s going to give Spitfire an earful,” Soaring’ lamented with a shudder.
“Sorry about that, sugarcube, Ah guess Ah really messed up the evening after all,” Applejack apologized to the normally goofy grey stallion.
Soarin’ seemed to pause in place before he turned to face the orange mare. “It wasn’t that bad.”
Applejack turned to look at the stallion, who could barely contain himself. “Alright, it wasn’t great but it was fun and certainly one of the more memorable ones.”
“Yeah right,” dismissed Applejack, “you’re just sayin that to humorin me.”
“No I mean it,” asserted Soarin. “Every mare puts on this facade, like she thinks she needs to be cool to impress me or something. Honestly, it’s freshin’ to see a mare, just let it all out. Plus not every first date ends with me ripping the mare’s dress. Shame, cause you looked really pretty in it.”
“Huh, what this stuffy old thing?” chuckled Applejack looking down at the torn shreds , “A friend of mine made it for me. Ah’m more worried how she’s going to react when she sees me tomorrow.”
“Not as bad as Spitfire, I bet.”
“Heck, you only did it because I made such a mess in there. If I hadn’t lost my temper and all-"
“Are you kidding? That was the best part.. In case you didn’t notice, you hit Spoiled Rich in the face with a pie. And well, trust me when I say: she deserved it,” Soarin’ assured Applejack with a small laugh. He understood hosting private parties, but she was always such a mule about it. Often she had even gone so far as demanding the Wonderbolts drop whatever they were doing, and fly a personal show for her little daughter, just because she’d won some school election -- or something.
“What I’m really sorry for is that pie,” Soarin’ explained gloomily.
“What about it?” Applejack couldn’t help but ask.
“That was a sorry waste of such a wonderful Apple Pie. It’s deliciousness wasted on the world’s most rotten pony,” Soarin’ lamented with an actual sniffle and a definite look of sadness on his face.
“Well shoot. We got the best apple pie in Equestria at Sweet Apple Acres. Why don’t you come over, and Ah’ll cut you a slice,” Applejack offered with a warm smile, and a slight snicker. “While you’re there, you can meet my daughter Apple Bloom,” Applejack concluded as she gestured for the stallion to follow her back to Sweet Apple Acres.
“Really? That’d be great!” the stallion acknowledged with a huge childish grin and the eagerness of a school cult. Applejack barely managed to suppress a snicker. Instead she gave him a sagely nod as she glanced back at him from over her shoulder.