//------------------------------//
// Free-Range and High Pedigree 
// Story: The Sleep-Deprived Sisterhooves Social 
// by Wise Cracker 
//------------------------------//

Scootaloo was over the moon to be taking her aunt to the Sisterhooves, of course, so much so that she spent half the way there hopping and buzzing her wings, hovering over the ground as long as she could. That sight alone was worth the discomfort. Vinyl's headache felt marginally better once Sweet Apple Acres came into view. Her stomach still churned, her vision still blurred at times, but she could walk, and walk straight, and that's all that mattered. The alcohol would clear out of her system in a few hours, all the other stuff she'd imbibed to fit in with the elephants would wear off soon after, and after that it would only be a matter of fighting off the urge to sleep while she competed, piece of cake. As long as there were no sudden noises-

"Darling!"

The voice cut through her skull like a knife through butter. "Rarity, hi. What's the hap?" Vinyl did her best not to wince as she rubbed a hoof over her ringing ear. The non-ringing one drooped in a mix of sympathy and self-preservation.

Rarity came trotting over to Vinyl and Scootaloo with such a radiant smile on her face Vinyl was happy to be wearing shades. "Oh, I'm helping out with the festivities, of course."

"You're competing?" Scootaloo asked.

"No, Sweetie Belle is off with our parents today. I'm only here as a judge for the biathlon."

Vinyl and Scootaloo looked at each other, in that particular knowing way that only cynical lawyers, compulsive cheaters, and close relatives could.

Rarity noticed. "It's a sewing and sowing biathlon. I'm judging the sewing part, obviously."

"Of course," Vinyl replied.

"Are you two competing this year?"

"Yup!" Scootaloo said proudly. "Me and Aunt Vinyl are gonna take home the prize."

"I look forward to seeing that. The prize should be arriving soon, too, if I know her schedule, and I like to think I do." Rarity looked up at the sky.

Vinyl followed suit, and quickly regretted it. Angling her head like that gave Rarity a glimpse of what the sunglasses were hiding.

"Are you quite alright, darling?" Rarity asked.

"I'm fine," Vinyl said, moving along. "Come on, Scootaloo, let's see where we can get signed up. Later, Rarity."

Rarity snorted ever so quietly. "Yes, darling. Later."





"So you're sure you don't want your books today?" Spike asked as he walked beside Twilight.

"I'm sure, Spike. Today is just for the two of us. I can worry about that silly Pole Problem laturrr-" an electric jolt ran through her body, snapping her out of the creeping daze. "Hoo! What was I saying?"

"Pole Problem?"

"Right. Princess Celestia wants me to learn restoration spells by the end of the month, but I can get that worked out later. I just hope no one minds the spell I'm using to stay awake."

"Actually, they only mind if you use spells during the competition, prepwork spells have to be approved in advance."

Twilight's ears perked at the new arrival's voice. "Oh, Thunderlane, hi." Even in her sleep-deprived state, Twilight's mind quickly managed to calculate that, if she was looking up to see the dark grey pegasus stallion, she should probably look down for a lighter-shade colt, too. "And Rumble, hello."

"You two doing the Sisterhooves too?" Spike pointed a thumb towards the referee table.

"Yup, the whole event. You?" Rumble asked.

"Same thing. If they don't mind boys, that is."

"They shouldn't," Twilight explained. "The Sisterhooves Social was named after the prize, not the contestants. It was actually stallions who would compete for marriage opportunities, usually brothers for sisters."

"Ew," Rumble said.

Twilight chuckled. "Don't worry, I'm sure that part of the tradition isn't in place now."

"Yeah, I don't think Princess Celestia would appreciate that kind of thing nowadays," Thunderlane joked. "Rumble, why don't you go sign us up? I'm gonna go check the field for the first contest, see if the list is up yet."

"Got it."

Twilight nodded. "Right, the opening contest. I should check the list, too. Spike?"

He was already in saluting position. "On it."

"Sign us up, get our numbers, and don't forget to mention the spell," Twilight insisted. "It's Bitterroot's Stay Awake spell, they should have a rulebook with them. It'll say whether it's allowed or not."

"Will do."

Thunderlane quirked an eyebrow. "Why do you need a spell to stay awake, anyway?"

Twilight yawned as she walked beside him. "I was studying restoration spells last night and I got stuck on something, so I stayed up too laahuh-" Bzzt!  Another jolt snapped her to attention. "Whoa! Umm, I stayed up too late, so I cast a spell to keep myself going. It's not a steroid spell or anything, it won't give me any competitive advantage."

The stallion stared at her blankly. "Uhuh. Are you sure maybe you shouldn't, I don't know, go home and rest?"

Twilight flashed him one of her smug Canterlot smiles. "Nice try, Thunderlane, but I'm staying right here, and I intend to compete to the best of my abilities. I promised Spike, and I can't back out of a promise. It's my duty as his caretaker."

"Ah. Yeah, I know what that's like."





"Vinyl... Scrrraaatch..." Scootaloo said as she scribbled the name of her aunt on the paper.

The green pegasus pony at the table nodded and gave Scootaloo some sheets of paper. "Okay, this is your number, the competition will start in ten minutes."

"Hey, Scootaloo."

"Hey, Spike." Scootaloo greeted as he walked up to the sign-up board, Rumble behind him.

"Hey, Scootaloo," Rumble said.

"Hey, Rumble."

When her brain had managed to catch up to what her eyes and ears had been telling her, Scootaloo furrowed her brow. "Wait, you're competing?"

"Uhuh," Rumble replied.

"Not you; Spike. What are you doing here?"

"Me and Twilight are gonna compete," the dragon replied.

"For what?"

"For the main prize, of course."

Scootaloo's heart skipped a beat. "You what? But the main prize is-"

Right at that moment, a wooshing sound passed through the orchard. It was swiftly followed by a rainbow streaking across the sky.

"Okay, little ponies!" Rainbow Dash cried out, making the trees shake. "Which one of you lucky kids is gonna win a day with me?!"

A day with Rainbow Dash. Scootaloo had dreamed of the opportunity for as long as she could remember. Not that long, considering the girl hadn't quite grown an expansive attention span, but it's the thought that counts.

Scootaloo growled at Spike. "That prize is mine."

The little dragon shrugged. "Sure it is. If you can beat me and Twilight. Who'd you bring?"

Meanwhile, Rumble had run into Apple Bloom, who was likewise surprised about his entering the competition. She huffed, she glared, she growled, but Rumble was not to be dissuaded; he put his name on the sheet, along with Thunderlane's, and he took the numbers, before turning his back on her. She, likewise, made a dramatic show of turning her backside towards him.

"I brought my aunt Vinyl," Scootaloo said, ignoring the plot twists between Apple Bloom and Rumble.

Spike scratched his head, confused. "You're related to Vinyl Scratch?"

"Well, yeah," the filly replied. "Who do you think was watching me during the royal wedding?"

"I always kinda figured you were one of those free-range chi-err, ahem, children. Yeah, free-range children, that's totally what I was gonna say," Spike stammered, feeling the glare from that free-range child. "Good luck, anyway. You'll need it against me and Twilight."

Scootaloo snorted before leaving him behind. She didn't even hear Spike asking about the stay awake spell.

No matter. She had her aunt with her. Aunt Vinyl was one of the awesome ponies around.

She wouldn't be beaten.

Scootaloo gulped.





Vinyl felt, more than heard, the cry over the orchard as Thunderlane passed her by with a nod. Her stomach churned in protest again, but she held her breakfast down with force of will. Next to her, another unicorn was likewise having trouble with the noise, if the wince was anything to go by.

"Rough night?" Vinyl asked.

"Huh? Oh, hey. Vinyl, right? Or is it Pon3?"

"It's Vinyl when I'm off stage, Twilight."

"Ah. And to answer your question: no, not a rough night; just a late one," Twilight replied.

"Saving Equestria again, one spell at a time?"

Twilight chuckled at that. "Something like that. No impending invasion, though, not this time. I got carried away by my homework, is all. But I promised Spike I'd take him. I can't break a promise."

Vinyl's heart and stomach both objected to that sentiment. "No, I don't suppose you would."

"Have you ever done this?" Twilight nodded to the site of the first contest. Judging by the size of the crowds, they were right on time.

Vinyl looked away, trying hard not to blush. "Oh, I know my way around a rope, a little. Just the basics."

"Alright, is everypony present?" One of the referees called out. "All the adults, at least? Okay, then we can begin: our first contest will be a roping contest. Show-roping today with a single toss and an open list. The dummy has been approved by the Equestria Games Committee, so be careful when you're tying up the legs; if they slip from the rope, they'll knock your teeth out. That means you, little ponies: do not tie the dummy from the front or back. Grownups, you're welcome to risk your dental health at your own discretion. The list will be posted shortly."

Vinyl looked around to scope out the competition. Applejack would likely be a hard one to beat, but Vinyl had a secret weapon at the ready to outdo her. Thunderlane was sort of a wild card, but she could guess he might have some experience roping clouds. Other than that, there was Derpy, Berry Punch, the usual mares looking to spend a Saturday morning with shenanigans of all varieties, no obvious contenders.

Vinyl tried not to wobble once Scootaloo came bringing their numbers.

"What's wrong?" the filly asked.

Vinyl shook her head, before sticking the number 43 on her flank. Twilight probably had 42 reserved for some reason. "I'm thinking. We've got some stiff competition here: Applejack can out-rodeo us, Thunderlane might out-drag us if he's used to roping clouds."

"And Twilight?" Scootaloo fiddled with the number, making sure her otherwise blank flank was completely and totally covered up, even if it was with a mathematical cutie mark.

"Oh, I don't think Twilight will..." Vinyl stopped herself when she saw the purple unicorn scope out the list of permitted moves and their score.

"Let's see, carry the two, allow for an error margin of two seconds, then... yes, that should do it." Twilight smiled and raised a hoof for Spike to bump.

Vinyl groaned. "Twilight's gonna try to out-math us. Of course she is."

"Can we beat her?"

Vinyl looked down at her little niece. She hadn't even considered the scores would include the kids, as well. Keeping that in mind, the strategy changed drastically, as there were only two kids in Ponyville who were crazy good enough to be a serious contender in a showdown like this. One was Scootaloo, the other was Rumble. Apple Bloom might have posed a problem if it was purely a strength contest, but Vinyl was pretty sure the girl hadn't done any practice with a lasso yet.

Which, Vinyl realised in her hungover state, was kind of odd considering how obsessed that filly was with getting a cutie mark and how much Apple Bloom adored her big sister. You'd think that's the first thing she tries...

"Well?"

Vinyl shook her head to stop that train of thought. "Yeah, we got this. Don't worry, kiddo, your aunt's got a few tricks up her sleeve. But we're only gonna win this one way: you do exactly what I tell you. Got it?"

"Got it."

"Okay, let's have a look at that list and see what we can pull off."





"First contestant: Vinyl Scratch. Ready?"

Vinyl took the rope, first in her magic, then in her mouth. She perked her ears towards the target and lowered her body to bolt.

"Ready."

"Go!"

Vinyl's body protested, but Vinyl herself did what all Canterlot ponies tended to do with protests: take note and file it away to address at a more convenient time, the more convenient times usually involving pigs with various degrees in aeronautics.

She galloped and swung her head around to get the lasso going. Remembering the list, she rolled over her left shoulder, skidded over the ground when her roll was done, and finally whipped her tail around one of the dummy's legs, before yanking and knocking it clean off the ground with a firm buck.

Once it was off the ground, a front-hoofstand into a second buck launched it up high, sending it tumbling. In and of itself not a major feat for a fit pony, but doing that while keeping the rope off the ground required a level of concentration and body awareness most ponies never bothered reaching for in their practice.

The crowd ooh-ed.

Applejack, especially, was quite impressed. "Wow. She's gonna try to rope it in mid-air?"

"Is that bad?" Scootaloo asked.

"Depends if she can land it. It's a pretty high-level trick, especially for a contest like this."

Vinyl was on point. The rope lashed out, found the dummy's legs, and cut off its upward trajectory, making it jerk and fall to the ground. Her prey now properly stunned and knocked around, Vinyl pounced on the thing and locked its legs using an intricate knot.

Then she sat back and sighed. "How was that?"

The judges nodded in appreciation. "Very good show, Missus Scratch."

Something stung in her chest. "It's Miss Scratch, actually."

"Pardon. Next contestant: Scootaloo. Get ready, please?"

As the dummy was set right again, Vinyl walked over.

"Are you sure I can do this?"

"No, so don't worry if you can't," Vinyl blurted out. "Just do your best, okay? You gotta go for it, for real."

"Got it." Scootaloo scampered to the starting line.

"Did you honestly just tell her she can't do it?" Thunderlane asked.

"I don't try to tell her she can just do anything, no, not if I don't know she can. And this is something new, so there's no telling." Vinyl chuckled nervously. "Oh, sorry, I, err... I guess that sounds kinda harsh. It's not what you think, really. It's just how we do things in our family. She gets stage fright, you know? Worrying about stuff, overthinking it... It's easier to get over it if you just accept you might fail."

"She's right," Twilight said. "It's a Canterlot thing. Speaking of which, Vinyl, that was a very impressive show you put up there."

"I'll say," Applejack said. "You ever do a rodeo?"

"No, I, umm..." Vinyl tried hard to hide her blush. "I learned it in the Canterlot Filly Scouts."

"You learned roping in the Filly Scouts?" Applejack asked.

"Canterlot Filly Scouts. We take pride in our diverse curriculum," Vinyl lied.

"That's also true," Twilight said. "I don't remember learning roping in the Filly Scouts, though."

"Maybe you didn't join at the right time?" Spike offered.

"Maybe." Twilight tapped her chin, pondering.  "And come to think of it, that knot you did? I've seen my brother do that one. That's a Royal Guard knot, for tying up prisoners."

"Very diverse curriculum," Vinyl said, silently thanking the stars that Octavia kept quiet about their rope practice.

Vinyl turned her back to the proceedings, leaning on the fence and looking at the sky. Her stomach churned again, but nothing came up, and the throbbing in head was finally subsiding. A good bit of exercise, that's all she really needed.

Twilight Sparkle quirked an eyebrow. "Aren't you even going to watch?"

"Nah. She does better when nopony's watching, like I said," Vinyl replied, nice and loud so Scootaloo would hear. Rainbow Dash, who was now sitting in a tree a little ways away, apparently caught the remark. Vinyl ignored any glaring or grumbling the ponies around her might throw her way. She knew her niece well enough. She didn't need to watch.

Of course Vinyl did watch, though. She turned her head as soon as she heard the signal. Scootaloo ran towards the target, like Vinyl had said. Then the girl whipped the lasso back, like Vinyl had said.

Scootaloo tripped. This was not something Vinyl had said to do. She stumbled, and this was likewise an unexpected deviation from the master strategy. Then she chucked the lasso at the dummy's neck, which was getting back on schedule.

A firm yank, good, then approaching from the sides, and some fumbling with the same knot Vinyl had learned from Octavia after that one weekend in Las Pegasus (what happens in Las Pegasus and all that jazz), and the little pegasus was done. No overt stunts, no major ducks and bobs and weaves that would earn a high score, but it was done.

"Next contestant: Twilight Sparkle!" The judges called out.

Vinyl turned her head again once Scootaloo looked their way, to hide the fact she'd seen the whole thing. No one around her said anything to the contrary. "How'd it go?" She asked nonchalantly.

Scootaloo hum-groaned, in the same cute but sad way she usually did when she spent all night tossing and turning. "Pretty bad, I think. You didn't see?"

Vinyl shrugged. "You know me, kiddo: I respect a pony's privacy. Did you want me to see it?"

Scootaloo quickly shook her head. "No."

"Okay, then. No problem."

Spike kept his eyes firmly on Twilight as she made her move on the dummy. She did some zigzagging, some minor bobbing and weaving, but she went for a standard neck shot as the takedown. Another electric jolt through her body sent her off course, but she corrected it quickly enough.

Twilight's run was over quickly. The judges made no remarks on her performance, probably because of how mathematical it looked. Still, calculated motions were enough to score.

"Actually, Scootaloo, you weren't too bad," Spike said. "Especially for a pegasus who's never done it before."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Scootaloo replied. "Not like there's a lot of kids in town who can use a rope."

"Next contestant: Spike the Dragon!"

"No, not a lot." He grinned. "But don't forget: it only takes one to beat you."

Vinyl's ears twitched. "What?"

The dragon strode confidently into the arena.

Vinyl's heart sank as he picked up the rope. "Oh, no."

"What? What's the matter?" Scootaloo asked.

"Does Spike know how to rope?"

"He might, now that you mention it," Applejack said. "He did come by a couple of times to practise. He didn't do it for long, though."

The white unicorn groaned. "He doesn't have to; he's a dragon."

Applejack took a moment to let that sink in. "Beg your pardon?"

As Spike started his routine, Vinyl Scratch realised her error in judgment. "He has hands, with thumbs. He can do more tricks that way."

And more tricks was exactly what he did. He got the loop nice and big in a heartbeat, jumping up and over and sideways as he took his time getting into position.

Scootaloo's jaw dropped. "H-he..."

He danced through the loop, twirling it this way and that, hopping and skipping side to side. When he was done showing off, he caught the dummy with a neck shot and dragged it down, before tying it in a standard, common knot, that really didn't look any different from a bow around a present.

He got off and brushed his hands, strolling back with the confident gait reserved normally for the gentlecolts of Canterlot.

That's when it dawned on Vinyl why she'd made such an error. She'd figured she'd only be competing against Applejack and Apple Bloom, with Rumble and Thunderlane a close second. Together, Vinyl and Scootaloo could take Applejack and Apple Bloom, she was pretty sure of that. It was a close match, in her mind, certainly, but they could take it. Vinyl was, after all, a Canterlot unicorn of high pedigree. Not many things could stand against that and expect to win, not on this type of battlefield.

Unfortunately, other Canterlot unicorns of high pedigree could, and that's exactly what she now had to deal with.

Spike smirked victoriously when he arrived. "How do you like that?"

Scootaloo huffed. "Don't get too cocky. You haven't won yet."

"Oh, I think I just did," Spike said.

"Don't count your chickens before they've hatched, Spike," Twilight said.

"What?"

He ran over to look at the scoreboard. Twilight and Spike were listed with a score of 280, the maximum score according to Twilight. But Vinyl and Scootaloo had landed on a clean 420.

"How did you beat me?" Spike asked.

"She didn't," Twilight explained. "Beat you, I mean. Scootaloo's score was average, slightly below that. And mine was optimised as best I could, but I guess I forgot about the target modifiers."

"The whatnow?"

"The modifiers," Vinyl said, smiling. "You get more points for roping the legs, and for using different knots. It doesn't say so on the sign, but it's in the rulebook. Neck shots are standard, tripping is too easy, but an airborne shot gives you a big bonus. Most ponies at this kind of contest don't knock the dummy up to clear the legs. Or if they do, they have to use magic."

Spike grumbled and huffed, a tiny green flame escaping from his nose. "Well played, Scootaloo."

Twilight rolled her eyes. "Come on, Spike, no need to get upset. They beat us fair and square. Let's not get so distracted we miss the rest of the competition, okay?"

"Yeah, speaking of which, I need to make sure I'm watching out for the right ponies," Vinyl joked, moving closer to the fence to get a good view.

With the grownups not paying attention, Scootaloo took the opportunity to revel in her victory. "Guess we win this one. Nopony else is gonna get an air shot."

"Except maybe Applejack, no. But even if she doesn't, you won't be so lucky for every game."

"Psh, yeah right. Name any game, and we can beat you."

"Oh, I don't need to." Spike folded his arms in front of his chest. "You're losing the next one, I can tell you that much."

"Oh yeah? What makes you so sure?"

"Don't tell me you forgot?"

Scootaloo shook her head.

The dragon grinned evilly at her. "The next one is a singing competition."

The little filly felt the blood drain from her face. The ground fell out from under her. She would have enjoyed the sensation if her wings had been moving.

"Uh oh."