//------------------------------// // 2: If Only Quick Fixes Ever Worked // Story: Guardian of Forever (And Equestria Too, I Guess) // by Akouma //------------------------------// Mason and Sprocket strode the halls of the ostentatiously large structure that supposedly housed a member of royalty. The couple of locals they’d asked near the train station had pointed them in this direction, and the radical difference in aesthetic and size would’ve been enough on its own to steer the two that way. It didn’t seem quite right though. The town surrounding it could be called a village if you were generous, and there were no guards stationed at the entrance or anywhere inside. Not the typical hallmarks of royalty as Mason understood them. Sprocket, however, seemed to be impressed. He was practically vibrating with excitement. “Oh I can’t believe it! You’ve been in this world three days and you get to meet Princess Twilight!” He’d been eavesdropping outside of the magic specialist’s office, and he seemed far more credulous than the doctors had been. “And perhaps your new friend can come in with you, maybe?” Mason just nodded as he kept walking. They finally reached the gigantic double doors at the other end of the hall and knocked. The door opened a crack and a small, scaly purple head with green fins down the back poked out. “Hi! Are you here for the appointment Twilight’s been going on about?” Mason extended his hoof towards the little reptile. “That’d be me. Mason Smith. And this is my friend, Sprocket.” A pang of jealousy shot through him as the creature extended a hand towards him to shake. Sure, his new hooves had turned out to have a limited tactile telekinesis, but that was definitely worse than having actual hands. The door opened the rest of the way, revealing a massive circular chamber dominated by a table and several thrones around it. A purple pony got out of one of the seats facing away from the door, turning around to look their way with a smile. A moment later, Mason received an elbow to his stomach. Turning to find out what had just happened, he saw Sprocket doing what he assumed was a bow. He was about to follow suit when the mare in front of them spoke. “That really isn’t necessary,” she said. “I am Princess[1] Twilight Sparkle. And based on this letter I got yesterday, one of you has travelled a long way to get here. Which one of you is Mason Smith?” - [1]I’ve been waiting for anyone to use a word that translates to “king” or “queen” around here, and no luck. I think “princess” might be as high as their hierarchy goes. “He is,” Sprocket said while pointing. The princess turned to face Mason. “I see. Please, come into the throne room here and we can talk about your uh[2], situation.” - [2]Is it weird to you that this member of royalty just used a filler word? That’s weird, right? Twilight led them through the doors, gesturing at two of the seats across the table from her own. The little reptilian creature took a seat in the throne next to her’s that had been sized for him. “So Mr. Smith - can I call you Mason?” He nodded. “Mason, tell me how you arrived here. Because by the sound of what you told Doctor Nebula I might have a very quick solution to the issue.” Mason took a deep breath. “Well, I was at work. I work for an organization called the Guardians of Forever. Our job is to make sure that people don’t alter history with the use of time travel, or to steer history towards something resembling its normal state in situations where such alterations can’t be stopped. We have a base that exists in a pocket dimension, removed from space and time, which a hostile force found its way into and destroyed. The base’s evacuation protocols kicked in, which meant that it booted me to a random habitable point in my dimension, or at least tried to. Next thing I knew, I woke up here with a body I’m very unfamiliar with. Three days ago, I was a bipedal creature called a human.” As soon as Mason mentioned his species, Twilight positively beamed. “I’m guessing from your expression that you do have a quick solution? Because I would love a quick solution right now.” The princess hopped off her throne and walked briskly towards a different door from the one they had entered. The doors were enveloped in what Mason had come to recognize as pony magic, and they opened quickly. Beyond was a room that appeared to be a library or a very large study. Twilight crossed the room, stopping in front of a massive and decorated full-length mirror. Or at least at some point it was a mirror. Mason noted the various arcane contraptions around it and saw that they were actually connected directly to the thing. He had to question the usefulness of pistons made of wood, but he wasn’t the magic expert in the room. “I just so happen to have a portal to the human world,” Twilight said in a voice Mason easily recognised as someone who wanted him to be impressed. “It used to only open once every thirty moons, but I managed to find a more stable source of power and a channeling focus tuned to the other side. You can use it, on one condition.” “And what would that condition be?” Mason asked with what he hoped was a raised eyebrow. He wasn’t entirely sure which facial muscles did what yet. Mason jumped when Twilight poked him in the chest with the edge of her hoof.[3] “You are going to show me this organization that you work for. And they are going to explain how in Tartarus they or anypony can travel through time on a whim.[4]” - [3]I don’t know what royal etiquette normally entails in these parts, but I’d bet she doesn’t either. Something about this lady weirds me out. [4]My programming is at this point forcing me to remind you that this would be a substantial breach in policy, with punishments up to and including termination depending on circumstance. It doesn’t force me to care about this breach in policy, however. Just remind you. You do you, Mason. Hell, maybe they’ll take me back and get me a new agent. If Twilight noticed Mason’s sudden distraction, she didn’t think it important enough to stop. “Time travel, at least for us, is something that only a hoof full of ponies can even consider doing. The most powerful spellcasters in all of Equestria. I know exactly one pony who has done it and isn’t either an alicorn or became one[5] later. And if I’m being honest she’s probably going to become an alicorn at the rate she’s going.” She took a deep breath, then got back on topic. “The idea that enough pon… That enough people have access to this ability that there’s an entire large-scale organization dedicated to preventing its problems is unsettling to say the least. So that’s the deal. You get to go home, I get to see that home.” - [5]“Alicorn” translates here as “winged unicorn.” Given the context, I’m guessing ponies like her are very rare. They probably form the ruling class. Kinda’ racist, actually. Oh, and apparently it’s possible for these ponies to change species. So, that's a thing. Mason didn’t respond immediately. As his translator had pointed out, what she was asking was a serious offence. But the Guardians of Forever were usually understanding of strange circumstances. There were no rules there that couldn’t be broken with a very good explanation or the greasing of the proper palms. Mason was a bit short on anything he could use to bribe his way out of the problem, but he was fairly certain they would understand. “We have a deal, princess,” Mason said as he extended his hoof. Twilight bumped it with her own, and the two made to go through the portal, when the third pony in the room made his presence felt for the first time in the conversation. “Hey Mason,” Sprocket began awkwardly. “I wasn’t expecting you to just be heading back so quick like this. Figured I could learn a thing or two about all that tech you said your people have before you go.[6] I uh, well I’m sad to see you go. I know we only met the other day, but maybe you could come back and visit sometime?” - [6]Wait. Mason, can you feel it? There’s something behind his eyes. That’s Illumination! He’s either started down the road to catalyzing or… Oh, that poor guy. He’s so nice, too. He doesn’t deserve this. Mason could feel the guilt rising up as he realized what his translator was hinting at, but he still had a mission to accomplish. “Yeah, um. Of course Sprocket. As soon as I get things settled back home, I’ll be back,” Mason half-lied. He didn’t know what he’d be up to once his business at home was settled, but he knew he didn’t want his new friend facing what was about to hit him alone. Not when it was unquestionably Mason’s fault to begin with, at least. “Well, that was a bust,” Mason said as they came back through the portal. “Well, it didn’t really cost you anything but time. Is something wrong, Mason?” Mason had frozen on the spot. He didn’t realize it, but every part of his new body was signaling danger. Ears and eyes pivoted trying to find whatever had alerted him. Muscles tensed, ready to bolt. Breaths became shorter and quieter. And then a pink blur burst into the room, and Mason screamed like a small child. Twilight, for her part, simply chuckled. “It’s alright! This is just my friend, Pinkie!” As Mason cowered from what his senses were telling him was an abomination, it began to speak. “Oh my gosh hi I’m Pinkie Pie! My Pinkie sense[7] told me there wasn’t just one new pony in town but two and I just had to come and say hello! And then when I got here your friend Sprocket who’s super nice by the way told me you were from another world and you do a bunch of science stuff and that’s so cool and hey why are you crying?[8]” - [7]Clearly just a nickname for something. I’m guessing an Apokalypsi something. [8]Deep breaths, in and out. She’s not hurting you. I know it’s unlikely, but she might be a nice one. Mason’s brain finally resumed some of its normal activity, and he turned to face his host instead of the most unsettling thing he’d seen since his arrival. “Twilight, I very urgently need to tell you something, in private.” Twilight was clearly confused, but she could take a hint. “Um, alright Mason. Hey Pinkie, could you give us a minute?” “Okie dokie, Twilight!” Pinkie snapped off a mock salute and exited the room as abruptly as she had entered it. Twilight wasted no time confronting her guest about the issue after the door closed. “Listen, I know Pinkie can seem like a little much at first, but she’s one of the friendliest ponies I’ve met in my entire life and-” “No Princess,[9] you don’t understand. Let me back up a little bit. I have the ability to harness an energy source called Mania. Most people like me use it to power fantastic, impossible inventions. But it has an inherent toll on the mind, which you probably guessed from the name.” - [9]Probably a bad idea to directly interrupt royalty, but hey we’ve got bigger problems at the moment. “I don’t see what this has to do with Pinkie Pie,” Twilight replied. Mason sighed. “Getting there, I promise. Mania warps your ability to think rationally. It burns inside your head until there’s nothing left but itself. There’s a middle ground between a person fighting that burn and someone who’s gone, though. People who accept the Mania, and bend it directly without even thinking about it. Reality starts to warp around them, conforming to their beliefs instead of physics. And that makes them dangerous. We call them unmada, and anyone who can use Mania can sense when they’re near one.” He paused to let Twilight connect the last dot on her own. After a short moment, the realization dawned on Twilight’s face. “So you’re saying that Pinkie is…” Mason nodded. “The most powerful unmada I’ve ever personally encountered.” The tension in the room came crashing down when Twilight started laughing. “You have no idea how long I’ve been wondering how she does half of the stuff I’ve seen her do.”