//------------------------------// // Chapter: Nine. Miscommunication. // Story: I'm the Princess of Equestria!? // by OtakuBrony47 //------------------------------// I tried my best to wing it. Of course, it was less than successful. Apparently, there's a lot to table manners I didn't even know existed. Dab the napkin, don't stuff the napkin in your shirt (or dress in my case), no elbows on the table, don't start eating until everyone else has also been served, sit up straight, EVEN IF YOU NEED TO LEAN FORWARD TO EAT! A Princess does not talk with her mouth full. My wasn't even full (its pretend food)! Pinkie OUT when drinking from a teacup! Granted I knew that one, but Holy Crap, she also made me do with other types of glasses! Who drinks from a wine glass with there pinkie out!? Oh my god! At least its over. I can move on, hopefully to easier tasks. The tutor finished documenting the results in her note book, and smiled at me. "Okay, now let us move on Greeting guests and other members of Royalty" she said. I smiled and nodded. How hard can this task be. All I have to do is bow and smile, right? We got up from the tables and walked over to the center of the ballroom, that was assumingly the dance floor. The tutor cleared her throat. "Let's begin," she said. "I am The Emperor of Japony. I arrived to your kingdom with the intend of touring its sites and seeing what it has to offer. How would you greet me?" Ignoring the pun (which I'm sure is probably true in this universe), I smiled slowly and lowered myself to a bow. "Kon'nichiwa, Emperor. Welcome to my Kingdom" I said. "I hope your trip here was swell. And enjoy your visit in Equestria." The tutor smiled a bit. "Good" she said. "However, I think you missed some dialogue." I frowned. "Oh, I'm sorry. What did I forget to say?" The tutor replied with smirk, "Everything" she said. I raised in eyebrow, confused as to what she meant. "Let's try again. This time, I'll play the role of your guests. You have to listen to my speech and determine how you would greet me" she instructed. Can't be too hard, I thought. Unfortunately... "Go aisatsu purinsesu. Anata no shiriai o tanoshima sete kudasai" said the tutor. "Huh?" I said in confusion. "Go aisatsu purinsesu. Anata no shiriai o tanoshima sete kudasai" replied the tutor. "How would you greet me?" she asked. I'm suppose to speak Japanese. SOME ONE PUNCH ME! I'M SUPPOSE TO SPEAK A FOREIGN LANGUAGE! "Uuuuh?" I moaned, fearful and oblivious as to what I am suppose to say. What am I going to do? Kon'nichiwa is the only word I know! "Uuuuuh, Kon'nichiwa, err, Emperor-san" I nervously said. "Watashi Happy, uuh, Boku wa Tomadachi. Kimi wa... Oishi?" I'm just going off of memory from the few episodes of anime shows I've seen. I have no idea what I'm saying. "Uuuh, Pantsu wa Shonen, Toyota no desu, err... Oppai??" The tutor stared at me with a confused and surprised expression. I can safely assume I failed. Spectacularly. I have no idea what I said to her, but I think one of those words her "Panties". Great, I told the metaphorical Emperor of Japony (which is a stupid name), "I am happy to make his panties!" I slap my forehead. "L-Let's just move on" said the tutor. I nodded in agreement. Hopefully, I'll get to speak a language I can actually speak, like Spanish. Or French. I did take French classes in school. So maybe I can get a test where... "Now then," she said, interrupting my train of thought. "I am the Duchess of Germaneigh, greeting you to my kingdom." Germaneigh? Is that like this world's version of Germany? And if that's the case, that means... Oh sh*t, I'm Screwed! "Greet me in my native language" she instructed, then began: "Guten Tag, Prinzessin. Willkommen in Deutsch-wiehern Land. Ich bin demütig willkommen in meinem Königreich und hoffe, dass Sie Ihren Aufenthalt hier genießen, so wie ich es mag, Sie zu präsentieren." Yep. Super Screwed! "Now. How would you reply to the Duchess's getting?" asked the tutor. I stared awkwardly into oblivion. I had now idea what to say! I don't know German! What am I gonna do!? I need to say something! Anything! "Das Uber schnitzel weiner, den Heineken, Berlin die schwartz Birkenau... uuh, Lederhosen!" The words of incoherent German gibberish flew out of my mouth, and felt like an utter re***d saying them. Especially aloud. I could tell by the look on her face, that I wasn't even close to being correct. I turned red from embarrassment, blushing so hard, I could feel heat coming out of my facial cheeks. The tutor replied with a single word, "Ernst." She said it with a raised eyebrow and a squinted eye, with a dragged out tone in her voice. Like if she was saying it in the form of a question. I didn't know what to say, so I shrugged. With the click of her pen, she wrote in her notebook and shook her head. I grit my teeth in fear. I'm totally blowing this! At this rate she'll begin to suspect something is up! I need to think of something to say. Fast! "I haven't really been studying" I said. The tutor looked at me with a raised eyebrow, her mouth arched in a frown. "Really?" she said with sarcasm, "I hadn't noticed." I sheepishly grin, as I yell to myself, in my head, "NICE SAVE GOING DUMBASS!!" The tutor slowly got up from her seat and asked me to do the same, and stand in front of her. "Let's see if you at least remember how curtsey properly" she said. "Curtsey?" I asked. "Your princess bow" she replied. "I'm a common noblewoman. I curtsey before your glory, Princess." I watched, seemingly confused as she preformed this "Curtsey". It seemed to a bow with one leg extended out the other. Oh, so that's what THOSE are called, I thought to myself. In the few princess movies I've seen, I do remember that the princesses always seem bow that way or similar. After her display, she instructed me to do the same. I nodded and greeted her with an appropriate princess bow. A perfect curtsey. She nodded, and playfully patted me on the head. "Good" she exclaimed, "very, very good!" I nodded in reply. "Although, you still failed in the language portion" she said." I replied with another nod. "What happens now?" I asked. "Well, now I would evaluate your ballroom dancing, but seeing as how you broke your heels earlier, I think were done here" she said. I slowly gulped, and cleared my throat to reply. "So were done here?" The tutor nodded. "How id I do?" I asked her. Looking at the notes she has been making the Tutor gave me my final score. "Let's see... Average posture, Below Average Grace, Below Average Table Etiquette, Below Average Appearance, Unsatisfactory HYGIENE..." I blushed, turning away as she said that. "Lack of Knowledge in Foreign Languages, Lack of Knowledge with Utensils, Confessed to Not Studying, and ONE Perfect Curtsy. That brings your total score to... 45." I face palmed, before inhaling and exhaling. "And how much did I needed to pass?" I asked. The tutor looked at her notes again. "You needed at least a 500 to pass with Satisfactory" she said. I clenched my fists tight and inhaled deeply, nearly on the verge of yelling out. I exhaled and slowly smiled. "Well, isn't that something?" I said. The tutor nodded. She gathered her things and left the ballroom. Before exiting she turned back to me. "Princess Celestia" she said. "Yes?" I answered. "Do study next time we meet, young lady" she advised. "I'll remember" I said. The tutor walked off, and I was left with my thoughts in the ballroom. I sat back down on one of the dining table chairs, and sighed. I stared at my broken heels, and pondered. First of all, why would humanlike creatures with hooves for feet even need to wear any form shoe? Bust most of all, I pondered about my failings. "I'm Happy to Make your Panties!" I vented to myself. "Jesus Christ, this was a disaster!" "You have no idea!" said a voice behind me. I turned I around in a panic, thinking that I might have been caught by one of the staff or an unknown bystander. However, I breathed a sigh of relief and a groan of disappointment when I realized it was only Discord. "What are you doing here, and what do you want now!?" I asked, annoyed. "I thought you were on a "HOT DATE", no?" Discord relied with a chuckle. "Yes I was, but she canceled, so I thought I'd come back to see how things were going for you." He leaned in closely and placed his arm around me. "And my oh my, did you blow it!" he gloated. "I mean first your heels break. And then you fail on speaking alternate languages?" He clicked his teeth, and shook his head. "Quite unfortunate. And really bad timing huh?" he said. I angrily frowned and pushed his arm away from me. "Yeah, bad timing" I said with sarcasm. "And I assume you had NOTHING to do with that?" Discord smiled devilishly and snapped his fingers. There was a sudden jerk in my body, and feeling of being picked off the ground. And when I looked down, my heels were back on my feet. Or hooves, in this case. And they were completely repaired. "I don't know what your talking about" he said, seemingly taunting me. "So it WAS you!" I exclaimed. "Look Liam," he began to monologue, "you had a long day. Why don't you relax a little bit? Enjoy some of the perks of being a princess." He approaches me, and creepily runs his hands through my hair. I flinched as he does so, and grab onto my head, feeling violated. "Keep your claws off me buddy!" I snapped. "You seem tense Liam" he teased. "Trust me. Why not read a book? Play some checkers or chess? Tour the castle? Have Clairol prepare you a bath? Whatever you can think of. Just take the rest of the afternoon off." Discord nudged me aside repeatedly pushing further towards the exit of the ballroom. "Your trying to get rid of me are you!?" I asked. Discord frowned, and gave me every angry eyes. I became a little scared as leaned in closely. "Look, you wanna debate cheating with me for the rest of the day, or do you wanna keep exploring this place. You should know you have a privet movie theatre you know." "I'm not going anywhere until... Privet Movie Theatre you said?" "We even have our own version of Die Hard. You like 80's action films?" I pondered for a moment before nodding back. "Okay, I'll play your game for now" I said. "But don't think I'm going to forget about this!" I declared. Discord replied with a nod. "Sure. Now, theatre is upstairs, 3rd floor, far end of the 2nd hallway, second to last door on the right" he told me. "There's a sign that says Cinema. You can't miss it." And with that I was off to see what kind of interesting movies this weird new world will has to offer. [Discord's P.O.V.] "Okay, I'll play your game for now, but don't think I'm going to forget about this... this... this... this..." I chuckled as his voiced repeated in my head. Liam has a lot of guts I'll give him that. And is smarter than I gave him credit for. Looks like I need to be more subtle. Of course, Liam still needs to remember his place in our agreement. If he get's too cocky, I can expose him right then and now, to everyone. And he needs to be reminded of that. "Be careful how you talk to me, Liam. You maybe a God Princess now... but your still, Liam Anderson."