A Draconequus's Destiny

by TheOnlySaneDraconequus

Chapter Four: Snapshots From the Seasons

My first few days in Equestria turned into a few weeks, and then into a few months. I was surprised at how quickly it went by. Life wasn’t very exciting, I mostly did homework, and spectacularly failed to preform even foal-level magic, but Twilight was convinced it would click somehow. I even managed to get a job, of sorts. On my days off from studying magical theory, I would go to the town hall, and help to organize the files. Mayor Mare and Pinkie were grateful for the extra help. The pay wasn’t very much, but since I didn’t need to eat or pay rent, it slowly started to add up. As a way to help my income, and try to make friends, most mornings before dawn I would sneak out of the castle, and help the merchant ponies to set up the market. I only earned about three bits a day doing this, but the pay I wanted most I got: ponies who looked forward to seeing me, and who got to know the real me. There were a pawful of ponies who I didn’t think would ever trust me, but I learned to live with it.

I was starting to get used to the Ponyville way of life, and looked forward to some of the pony traditions.

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One day in early Autumn, Twilight came into my room before dawn, practically prancing with excitement. “I’ve got a great surprise for you today! Plus, you get the day off from lessons! Come on!” She ran out of the room. I followed her, unsure of what to expect.

“Are you excited?” asked Spike with a big grin.

“Why? What’s today?”

“It’s c-”

Twilight cut Spike off. “Spike! I want it to be a surprise! We’d better get going if we want to get a good spot!”

Starlight walked into the room, yawning. “Sorry,” she said, “I’m not much of a morning pony. Don’t worry, Draco, it’s nothing bad. I’ve only done it once before, but it’s totally worth the ungodly hour.” She walked slowly out of the room.

I was very confused by this exchange, but followed everypony out of the castle. We walked in the direction of Sweet Apple Acres. My jaw dropped, there was a line leading to the front gate that stretched back for what must have been a mile. A lot of the ponies were in tents, and were getting up, also almost dancing with excitement.

“OK. I give up. What is all this?”

“It’s cider season!” squealed Twilight happily.

“Oh? Is it this big a deal?”

I heard a deafening yawn behind me. “Of course it’s a big deal!” said Rainbow Dash. “You have not lived until you’ve had the Apple family cider.” Her mane was unkempt, and there were dark circles around her eyes, but she looked, ‘totally pumped,’ as she would have put it.

“If you say so.”

“Hi everypony! Oh, and everyDraconequus, Draco. How you all doing? Isn’t it a pretty day? The clouds look just like cotton candy. Hmm, wish I’d brought some of that. Anyway, what’dya think Draco? Is it amazing, or what?”

“Good morning to you too, Pinkie. Do you actually need physical rest, or are you this much of a morning pony?”

“Nah. I don’t need that much sleep, I’ve got too many ideas and things to do! Plus, morning’s such a pretty time of day! Don’t you think?”

“Yeah, it’s pretty nice.”

Rainbow Dash was giving Pinkie the evil eye. “If I don’t get any cider because somepony took it all again this year …” she didn’t need to finish the threat.

“Aww, Dashie! You know I wouldn’t do that again. It’s just the seven mugs this year!” Rainbow rolled her eyes.

“Good morning, everypony! It’s so nice to see you all.”

“Hi, Fluttershy!” Twilight called. Fluttershy joined us.

“How is everypony doing?”

“Good.”

“Great! I’m so excited!”

“It’s too early, but yeah, this is gonna be awesome.”

“Amen to the too early part. I’m fine, thanks.”

“It’s Draco’s first cider season, I hope he’ll like it.”

“Come on, Twilight, how could anypony not like cider season? That’s like not liking sapphire cupcakes.”

“Good morning, everypony!” called Rarity in a bright voice. Her coat was immaculate, and her mane neatly combed. I didn’t even sleep and my fur was sticking up in odd places. How she looked that good that early, I don’t know, but I know she wouldn’t ever appear in public if she didn’t.

“Morning!” everypony called back.

“Shall we?” asked Twilight.

“You can cut to the front of all this?” I asked with amusement.

“I am a Princess, which on occasion has its perks. Besides, I’m good friends with Applejack. I think you’re going to enjoy this.”

We walked to the front of the line, and saw a booth with tankards and mugs set up. As if on cue, the ponies began to chant, “Cider, cider, cider, cider…”

“All right, hold on everypony, there’s plenty to go around!” called Applejack to the crowd. Big Mac leaned down and whispered something to her. She rolled her eyes. “Yes, that’s him! How many eight-foot-tall noodles do ya even see walking around here?” She smiled warmly at me. “Mornin’, Draco! How’s ma favorite patchwork critter today?”

“I didn’t know I was your favorite!” I said coyly.

Applejack waved a hoof. “Yer alright. Yer much less manic than Discord, that’s fer sure.”

I looked at Big Mac, and stuck out a paw. “Pleased to meet you Mr. Macintosh!”

“EEEyyyuuupp!” Big Mac said enthusiastically while shaking my paw a mile a minute. “Please don’t call me ‘Mr. Macintosh.’ Makes me feel old.”

I tried to rub some life back into my paw. “Will do.”

Granny Smith was looking at me critically. “Ya aren’t going to do anything foolish, are ya?”

I nodded. “Most likely yes. I don’t mean to, but I’ve got an uncanny ability to get into trouble. I’ll try to keep the destruction to a minimum.”

Granny Smith smiled warmly at me. “Well, I appreciate the honesty. Glad you could make it! Our cider’s been famous for, well, long as I remember.”

Applejack grabbed a mug. “Here. If ya want anymore, you’ll have to buy it, but since it’s yer first cider season an’ all, I’d thought you’d like one on the house. Just one, though.” She quickly filled up the mug. I took it, and carefully took a very small sip. Applejack laughed. “Goin’ off the expression on yer face, I take it ya like it?”

I nodded. “This is the best apple cider I’ve had in my entire life! If anypony needs me, I’ll be in a tree, hoarding tHiS mOST pRecIOuS DrINk. *Ahem.* Sorry, I don’t know why my voices did that. A little cyan bird told me there’s a limited supply, so I’ll just take the one, thank you very much! I’ll be back to socialize, but right now, I want to savor this.”

I walked to the edge of the orchard, and climbed a tree, using my tails to keep the mug steady. I was slowly sipping my cider, trying to savor all the flavors, when a voice called, “Howdy! I’m Apple Bloom! You’re that new Draconequus, right?”

I turned my head upside down to look at her. “Yes, that’s me. It’s nice to meet you. You don’t seem to be scared of me. Why?”

She rubbed her legs together. “Well, you are kind of scary.”

“What makes me scary, exactly? I’m not hurting anypony, I haven’t turned reality inside out. Is it just the way I look? My eyes? Do I just scream ‘creepy’ without realizing it? I’m not a bad person, I’m just very different.”

“It’s … just that nopony really knows you, and what we don’t know can be scary. You seem nice, but we don’t know what you’re going to do. I think you’re nice, and my sister really likes you, she’s been telling us all about you.”

“Well, for the moment, I’m going to enjoy this cider, and sit in a tree, and think. I don’t think I’ll ever turn reality inside out, even if I have a really bad day. I’m not going to do anything bad to anypony, the town, or Equestria. Just because I have evil in my nature doesn’t mean I act on it. Well, mostly not. I hope, in time, ponies will realize that I just want to help.

“You know, the unknown is scary, so I can see why a new Spirit you don’t know anything about would be scary. But … the entire universe is full of unknows … some are so beautiful they can’t be imagined, some are so terrifying they don’t need to be known. Yet, ponies still go out, look at the stars, and marvel at the unknown. Quite a contradiction in behavior, isn’t it? Sorry, I love contradictions, I thrive on opposites, so I tend to blather on about them. Still think I’m scary?” I said with an evil grin.

Apple Bloom shook her head. “Actually, you’re pretty neat! You aren’t scary at all once somepony talks to you. You have a funny way of seeing things, but, I guess it makes sense. Nice talkin’ to you!” she trotted back in the direction of the main gate. I started laughing hysterically at the fact that somepony actually understood what I was talking about for once, and it was a grade-school filly.

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One evening in late October, Twilight stopped at the foot of the stairs, and glanced up at me skeptically. “What are you supposed to be?”

I was wearing a long-sleeve dress shirt that I’d stitched together from two shirts, one side was normal, the other was a different material, and frayed and burned. I’d used a bit of makeup to emphasize the differences in my face, and was tossing a bit up and down.

“I’m Twoface,” I growled in a low voice.

Spike walked into the room. “Don’t you mean Schism, enemy of Batmane?”

I dropped the bit in surprise. “You-you mean you actually have that comic here?! I’ve been missing out on it this whole time?!! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?!!”

Spike shrugged. “I didn’t think you liked comics. I’ll let you borrow some, if you swear upon your honor to not damage them.” I frantically nodded. He laughed. “Ok! Ok! You don’t have to act like Winona begging for a treat! Like my duds?”

I looked at him quizzically. He was wearing a red cape, a thin silver crown, had on a long-maned black wig, and had a red-painted cardboard tube sticking out of his head. He bared his fangs, and hissed, “CCRRRRYYYSSSSSSSSSTTAAALLLLSSSSS….”

I hit my forehead with my paw. “Duh! King Sombra! You look great, Spike! You’ve got the evil hiss down perfectly.” I shuddered. “I don’t want to know what would happen if I ever meet him.”

I turned to Twilight. She was wearing an old-fashioned pink cape with fur trimming, and a pink pointed hat with silver stars. “OK, I can tell you’re a famous historical mage, but I don’t recognize the costume. Silvermane Glint?”

“Close. Greymane Spark.”

I rolled my eyes. “Right. Because nopony could possibly mix that up. Who was she again?”

“A student of Starswirl’s. She helped to find the specific formula to determine the exact magical measurement of an enchanted object! Her work helped to redefine counter-curse measures!” Twilight was in full on “geek-out.” I laughed.

“Where’s Starlight?” I asked.

“Who wants to know?” came an eerie voice from above me on the stairs. A shadow swooped over me, and the Vampiress Glimmer landed on the ground effortlessly. I put a paw on my chest to slow my heartsbeats.

“That is some seriously impressive theater there.”

She chuckled. “Well, having to smooth-talk ponies into giving up their identity did give me some good acting lessons. You look nice. Schism, right?” I nodded. “It was one of my favorite comics as a filly, so I know the villains on sight. Where’d you get the shirt?”

“I, uh, made it. I’m not much of a haberdasher, but that works for this costume. Rarity liked my help organizing so much, she gave me some shirts from the clearance bin to use. They’re kind of short.” The shirts only came down to my mid-stomach, but two shirts sewn together were at least wide enough for me.

“Weellll …”

“I know, I know, I’m the oddly sized-one in this town. At least I finally got some clothes. Shall we, my children of the night?” They all nodded, and we headed into the streets for Nightmare Night.

The streets were filled with cheering, laughing foals and fillies, being shepherded about by friends and family. The entire town was in costume, and the streets were ready for a fully-fledged fright fest. Ponies and foals waved to me, and smiled, I waved back.

“Schism, my good stallion, tell me, what’s your verdict on my costume?” I noticed Doctor Whooves behind me. He had a pair of grey-painted cardboard wings taped to his sides, a stylized wavy grey wig on, and was covered ears to hooves in grey dust and paint, with some jagged black lines running through it to look like cracks. He smiled, and I saw fangs sticking out of his mouth.

I hid behind Twilight. “Don’t blink, don’t blink, don’t blink, don’t blink …” I muttered robotically. “It’s, uh, perfect. Terrifying, even. I’m not going to get a wink of sleep. Oh. I don’t anyways. How have you been?”

“I have been truly delightful! Derpy and I have been doing a lot of traveling, we’ve really been enjoying seeing everything. There’s always so much to see! Dinky has been earning straight A’s in school, she takes after her mother for beauty and kindness, and me for cleverness. How fare things with you?”

“Good. I never really change. The lessons are going well, for knowledge if not for practical usefulness. I still can’t even manage basic levitation. Still, everything is just fine. Nice to see you!” The Doctor waved, and crossed the street to join Derpy. She was dressed as … a merpony, I think. I couldn’t be sure. Dinky was bouncing between them, dressed as a mailpony, with a mailbag for treats.

KABAM! I leaped into the air, and Twilight found herself holding me. “Bwah! He ha ha!! What’re you, chicken?”

“Cheetah/lion/bear/kangaroo/gazelle/bat/pony/noodle/who-knows-what.” I rattled off quickly. “That was seriously loud, Rainbow! If you’re going to scare someone with thunder, pick someone who doesn’t have bat hearing! OK, I should have heard you sneaking up. My bad. You did nearly make one of my hearts have an attack.”

“All part of the fun dude,” said Rainbow, sneaking her cloud off to find another victim. I swore I’d keep an ear out for her.

I picked my bit back up, and kept walking towards the center of town. Somepony fairly large stepped up behind me, and cleared her throat. “Yes?” It was a very large mare, in a dark cloak that obscured her every feature. Her eyes were glowing white within the hood. She beckoned me into a nearby alley. I followed her, and she her cloak dissolved into shadows. I bowed as best I could in my too-small shirt. “Your Highness?”

“Before tonight’s festivities officially began, I wanted to say hello to you. Your letters don’t say much, I just wanted a progress report.” Luna looked both serene, and … impish? There was something in her smile that said she was planning to enjoy herself.

“There isn’t much to tell, I don’t do much more than what is in my letters, and read. I’ve gotten closer to the ponies around town, but I haven’t become ‘best friends forever’ with someone. I’m not good at friendships, or at least at starting them. As for the other side of things, … zip. If you have time, I could recite Starswirl’s fourteen rules of basic enchantment, but I can’t actually perform magic.”

Luna smiled as best she could. “I am certain it will come in time, and I hear that you are making progress, at least with theory. I am glad that you are becoming more comfortable here, and that ponies are becoming more comfortable with you. It’s a good sign on both sides. Friendships will come in time, rest assured. It is very nice to see you again.”

As she started to trot away, I called, “Princess?” she stopped. “Just out of official ‘alien to this universe’ interest, do Spirits have to donate a portion of candy to the Night Mare as well? I wouldn’t want to be eaten. Besides, I don’t taste good.”

Luna gave me a wide, evil smile. “If you wish to survive the evening, I suggest you appease the Night Mare. She can be very … affronted if things do not go her way on this night.” She waved, drew her shadow cloak around her, and disappeared into the night.

I laughed. Will do, I thought. I slunk back out of the alley, and rejoined Twilight, Starlight, and Spike in the center of town.

“Hey, Draco? What do you want to do first?” Spike asked, gesturing to the carnival around us.

“I’m under direct royal orders to sacrifice a portion of my candy tonight, which means I need candy. I think I could earn some from the games, so I’ll let you pick.”

“How do you feel about the pumpkin catapult?”

I put a paw to my chest. “Moi? Destroy things for fun? I thought you’d never ask. Come on!” I half dragged him over to the stall.

“Howdy!” to my surprise, the pony running the stall this year was Applejack. “What can ay do ya for?”

“I need some candy to give away, or Nightmare Moon will eat me. Any chance I could earn some?”

“Go for it ya crazy noodle! Ya have yer choice of ten pieces of you get a bull’s-eye.”

I walked over to a catapult, and loaded my automatic squash into it. I squinted, and pulled the leaver. KER-SPLAT! “Bull’s-eye!” I cheered.

Applejack rolled her eyes, and forked over some candy. “Ya really are just an over-grown foal at heart, aren’t ya?”

“Mmm-hmm!” I said around some butterscotch.

Applejack chuckled. “Well, don’t grow up if you don’t haffta. Have fun y’all!”

“Uh, Draco? Aren’t you supposed to save some of that candy?” Spike asked.

I quickly swallowed. “Good point. Where to next?”

“The spider toss!” This time, he dragged me to the booth. I only managed six points, but got three pieces of candy. Spike got fifteen points, and eight pieces.

I started counting. “eight… nine… ten! What’s a good ratio to keep and to give?”

“You don’t need math silly! It’s just supposed to be fun. Great costume Spike!”

“Thanks Pinkie. I love yours.”

“Awww, it’s just a little something I threw together.” She was dressed as …. as …

“OK. I give up. Who or what are you supposed to be?”

“I’m a scary snow globe! Duh!” She gave a little shake, and small paper bats flew around the plastic bubble surrounding her.

“Just threw it together, hmmm?” I asked disbelievingly.

“Yeah, it took me almost two hours! Two hours! Can you believe it?” I shook my head.

“Hold on a minute.” I said. I trailed over to Twilight and Starlight. “Have either of you seen Fluttershy?” They shook their heads. I sighed, and started to walk in the direction of the Forest. Spike, Twilight, Starlight, and Pinkie followed me.

When I got to Fluttershy’s cottage, I knocked lightly on the door. “GO AWAY!!!” Fluttershy screamed, shaking the walls of her cottage.

“Fluttershy, it’s just Draco. It’s my first Nightmare Night, and I’d like all of my friends to have fun. Can you please come out?”

“O-Ok-k-kay.” I heard the door unlocking, and she slowly opened it a crack. She saw me, let out a squeal of terror, and slammed the door.

I sighed, and pawed my candy to Twilight. “Hold this for me, will you?” She nodded. I opened Fluttershy’s door, and sprang in. There was the sound of a fight, and a snarl. I opened the door, on all fours, carrying Fluttershy by the scruff of her neck in my mouth. I gently set her on the ground, and patted her on the back. “Deep breaths, deep breaths…”

As Fluttershy continued to hyperventilate, Twilight asked, “What the hay happened in there?”

I rubbed my snout. “That bear of hers packs a punch. You OK, Fluttershy? I’m sorry I scared you.”

She nodded, her teeth chattering. “F-fine! Thanks. Just give me a minute.”

Twilight looked at me angrily. “You really think pony-napping her was the best idea? If she doesn’t want to be here, you can’t just force her! I’m one of her best friends, and I can’t get her to come out on Nightmare Night! What were you thinking?!”

“I wasn’t. I just thought I’d like to spend some more time with all of you. All of you. I should have known a lot better, but I figured the best way to even talk to Fluttershy was to get her outside.”

Twilight’s horn sparked angrily. “When are you going to learn that your actions have consequences? It’s a good thing you don’t have magic, or we’d-”

Fluttershy separated us with her legs. “Twilight! He was fine, he didn’t hurt me, or Harry. Harry actually hurt him a bit. He just wanted to make sure I’m ok. He’s right, I should be out here. His actions were wrong, but sometimes you need to do something drastic to help ponies. I’m fine! In fact, I’m going to go have a lot of fun with all of you starting right now!” She quickly flew off. Twilight glared at me, and growled. She shoved my candy back at me, before trotting off after Fluttershy.

I hurried after them. Fluttershy was glancing around fearfully. “You know,” I said, “… I’m technically a monster, and you handle me just fine. Even with what just happened.”

“That’s because I know you’d never hurt me,” she replied, not looking up. “But sometimes I imagine things that are just too scary, especially tonight. You’re right though, I do need to start facing my fears about tonight.”

“And I need to stop doing whatever pops into my head just because it sounds good. Glad you’re doing better. Trust me, unless a bugbear shows up, I’m the scariest thing you’ll have to deal with tonight.”

Fluttershy looked at me with a slightly scary coy smile. “Are you sure? I’ve been told I’m good at scaring ponies too…”

“I can believe it. Sorry for scaring you and Harry. That bear is really protective, isn’t he?”

“I’m sorry he got you, but yes, he is very protective of me. Do you need some medicine?”

“I did break into your cottage, so I’d freak out if I was him too. I don’t need a bandage or anything, the scratch is all healed already. One of the perks of being me.”

*KABAM!*

“Yeeep!” Fluttershy and I screamed at the same time.

Rainbow Dash was rolling on the thundercloud, laughing so hard she was crying. “Draco, you are way too easy. Where’s the fun in that?”

I reached up, and was surprisingly able to pull the cloud down to my eye level. “Someday I will have my revenge…” I hissed, flicking my forked tongue out.

Rainbow smiled. “Bring it! I know you’ve got at least one good prank in you.” I nodded. Rainbow flew off towards the fair, chuckling evilly.

“That mare has a serious dark side,” I muttered. Everypony rolled their eyes.

We headed back to the square and found Rarity there as well. Rarity was in a hoof-stitched period piece, it looked like it belonged in the Renaissance. “Oh! Hello, darlings,” said Rarity. Everypony said hello back. “Draco, I wanted to thank you for helping me set up for the season, you were a lifesaver dear. I’m sure Spike was happy to take a small break.”

“I could have helped!” Spike protested.

“That was my way of making things up to both of you, I figured you’d earned a break,” I replied.

Rarity examined my costume critically. “So, that’s what you wanted those shirts for. They’re a bit snug, aren’t they?” I nodded. “Did you distress and sew them yourself?” I nodded again. “Well, your stitching style is … unique.”

I laughed. “Rarity, I’m a terrible sewer, you don’t have to lie to make me feel better.”

“I wouldn’t say terrible darling, I’d just say you need some practice.”

At that point, the entire sky darkened, and thunder cracked overhead. A colony of bats flew overhead. As they flew, the softly called, “Beware little ponies, for the Night Mare is coming … beware …”

I waved, and said “Hello there!” About twenty bats stared at me in surprise, before winging away. I turned to Twilight. “You didn’t tell me you had talking bats here! That is so cool!”

Twilight gave me a funny look. “We … don’t have talking bats here. They just flew overhead, chittering and squeaking. You made the same sounds back.”

I blinked in surprise.

“You … can talk to … bats?!” Rarity said with a note of horror in her voice.

I shrugged. “I guess so.”

“Ohmigosh! What else can you talk to?!” asked Pinkie with wide eyes.

“None of the animals I’ve been around talked, so I didn’t think that animals could talk. I think it’s just bats. That’s a strange talent to have. Must be my funny ears.”

Thick fog rolled into the square. Zecora walked into the center of town. “Those who wish to last the night, should follow me for a fright. Divide your treats two and two, or the feast tonight may just be … you.” Twilight smirked at me, and nodded. I followed Zecora and the foals to the statue of Nightmare Moon.

The foals and fillies were nervously glancing around, as if they expected something to leap from the trees. They quickly placed a large portion of their candy at the base of the statue, before forming into a group. I bent down, and offered my meager sacrifice to the Princess of Darkness. I looked at the group. “What happens now?” I asked in a puzzled tone. The foals and fillies were all staring past me with wide eyes. I folded my arms, and sighed. “It’s right behind me, isn’t it?” They frantically nodded.

I glanced behind me, and saw a pony-shaped patch of darkness, tendrils of smoke snaking out of it, a wide smile that was dripping blood on its muzzle. I raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you think that’s overdoing it a bit?” The thing lunged at me, and knocked me to the ground, before clamping its fangs onto my neck. At that point the foals and fillies screamed, and streaked back towards town. I was screaming too. Then Princess Luna melted back into her normal form, laughing her head off.

I sat up. “I get that they asked you to scare them, but that was straight out of creepypasta. You are terrifying when you want to be, I can see why you were so good at causing nightmares for a thousand years. I hope you didn’t scar any of them.”

Luna looked thoughtful. “I … might have overdone it a bit this year, yes. I wouldn’t have actually hurt any of them, I only bit you for dramatic effect. I’ll be sure to check on their dreams for the next few weeks.” She wiped something bright blue off her mouth, and looked at it thoughtfully.

I winced, and put a paw to where she’d bit me. “That hurt.” My paw was covered with the same blue liquid as Luna’s mouth. “Oh. That’s what my blood looks like. I think you’ve taken the whole ‘creature of the night’ thing a bit too far, if you’re playing vampire now.” I grinned. “Totally worth it. I almost peed my nonexistent pants. Seriously, I’m hiding inside next year.”

Luna smiled, but looked at me with concern. “I was not aware my teeth were quite that sharp in my disguise. I didn’t hurt you?”

“Nah. I’m a fast healer. Five minutes, there won’t even be a dent. I’m fine. Thanks for a great night. You know, that night when I heard that all of the Princesses were coming to meet me, I was convinced you were going to rainbow-friendship zap me into oblivion.”

Luna’s mouth dropped open. “We would never! Not unless you were a grave threat to Equestria, and even then we wouldn’t want to, we’d just have to. If you were a threat, we’d have tried to rehabilitate you first. That night, we simply all wanted to get to know you. Twilight had assured us that you were harmless, and she spoke very highly of you. We were interested. It’s not every day you meet a new Draconequus from another realm.”

I growled in slight annoyance at a memory. “Shining Armor told me that you all were planning a sentence for me.”

Luna rolled her eyes. “Shining Armor is a wonderful stallion and ruler, but he can be a bit of a troll.”

I grinned. “Look at you picking up the modern vocab!”

Luna shrugged. “I try.”

“I know I’m fun to mess with, but I was convinced that I was going to wind up on the moon. It wasn’t funny at the time. I’m going to head back, would you like to join me?”

“Yes, thank you.”

When we got back, Spike said, “They said you were dead! What happened?”

I glanced at Luna. “Somepony got a little too into her role this year.” Luan blushed, and looked at the ground, kicking a pebble with her hoof. “I’m fine, honest. I’m going to get something to eat, I think I could convince myself I’m hungry.” I spotted a Rainbow streak near one of the food stalls. Out of curiosity, I pulled out my costume bit, and flipped it. The scarred tails came up. “Actually, would you all excuse me for a few minutes?”

“Of course dear,” said Rarity.

I crept towards the Forest, keeping my eyes out. I then found exactly what I was looking for. I walked back towards the fair, sneaking up on Rainbow Dash. I then dropped something onto her.

Rainbow scratched her mane, and then looked at her hoof. “WHAAAUUGGH!” she screamed, leaping into the air, all four of her legs a blur.

I bent down, and picked something up. “This is the mountain fruit spider, it’s the only vegetarian spider in the world. Totally harmless.” I smiled evilly at Rainbow. “Just because I’m not anywhere near your league doesn’t mean I can’t prank.”

Pinkie was rolling around on the ground, her round costume was helping her roll even more. “You were, he ha! Flying without your wings, Dashie!” she managed to get out between laughs.

Rainbow Dash scratched the back of her neck. “OK. I might have overdone it on the whole scaring ponies thing. Great prank, Draco, but let’s have a truce for a bit. I hate spiders.”

“Deal. I’ll be right back, I need to put this little guy back where I found him.” I looked at Rainbow quizzically. “Do you think we could ever be friends instead of … whatever we are right now?”

Rainbow scratched her mane as she pondered the question. She then nodded. “Totally. I think we’ll just have to get used to each other first. I’m officially declaring a no spider rule from now on.”

“Thank you. Yeah, I don’t like spiders either, fair’s fair.”

“You seem fine with the one in your paw,” Fluttershy observed with a small smile.

“Weeeellll, he’s sort of cute. Catch you all later! Nice to see you again, Princess Luna.”

“And you,” Luna replied.

After dropping the spider back on his log, I walked back to the castle. I found Twilight waiting for me, a scroll dangling in the air in front of her. “Let’s see … socialized, played games, pony-napped Fluttershy, got into a fight with a bear, got Fluttershy to come out of her cottage and loosen up, helped to scare the living daylights out of the foals, albeit unintentionally, and lastly got into a prank war with Rainbow Dash, before making up with her.” She rolled the scroll up. “Sounds like you had a full night, even for you.” Her eyes narrowed. “YOU ARE TOTALLY GROUNDED!!!” she cried in the Royal Canterlot Voice.

I uncovered my ears, and with a grimace nodded, “Yes’m.”
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In mid-December, Twilight came downstairs to find something she couldn’t identify. It seemed to be a giant mound of quilts, comforters, and blankets that was propped up in the middle of the library for no apparent reason. She sighed, and started to levitate them away. A black paw and arm shot out of the middle of the mound, and played tug-of-war with Twilight’s magic and the blanket “Give it back!!” two voices desperately hissed in mostly-unison.

Twilight sighed, and walked over to the mound. “Draco,” she started to say.

My head popped out of my makeshift nest. “Give it back, or I will rend your coat from your bones.” I growled. Twilight swallowed nervously at my tone, and handed the blanket back. I disappeared back into the blankets, placing the blanket back on the top.

“Draco, what’s wrong?” Twilight asked, shifting some of the blankets so she could look down at me. I gave one of my hiss/growl/click mixes, and pulled the blankets back over me. “Draco.” Twilight said in her no nonsense tolerated voice.

I pushed the blankets off of me, and gave a slightly crazed smile. “There’s no sun! None at all! It’s all just thick, horrible grey clouds! For miles! Talking to the weather team, you’d think the planet would implode if Ponyville got even that weak winter sunshine that’s too bright.  Honestly, why can’t there be any daylight?”

“Do you, oh, what’s it called? Seasonal Affective Disorder?”

 “What was your first clue?” snarked Starlight, who’d walked into the room in some pajamas. She walked over, and examined my hoard. “I was wondering where that went! Give. It. Back!” I desperately held onto the quilt, but her magic wormed it out of my grip. My ears drooped.

Twilight sighed one of the sighs I’d come to recognize meant I was pushing things. “Why don’t you go outside? I’m sure your lessons can wait another day, if you’re that upset.”

“Outside’s too depressing.”

“OK, that’s it!” I was pulled out of my nest, and teleported to the door. “That’s your friendship lesson for the day, get outside, and have some fun. It’ll do you a lot of good, and help save what precious little is left of my sanity. You are impossible!”

At that point, there was a knock on the door right in front of me. I opened it, and found the Cutie Mark Crusaders looking up at me. “Morning Draco!” they called with wide smiles.

“Good morning, you three. What’s up!”

“We made you all some cookies,” said Scootaloo as Sweetie Belle levitated up a plate. On the plate were things that may have been charcoal briquettes in another life. “They, uh, kinda burned.” Scootaloo continued.

“Thank you! How kind!” Twilight said. “I’ll just put them over here.”

I snapped out a paw, and grabbed a cookie. I sniffed it, and bit into it. I chewed for a minute. “Peanut-butter oatmeal?” I guessed.

“Yeah,” Scootaloo said with surprise. “You can tell?”

“Mmm-hmm. I did the same thing to cookies every year until I was over twice your age. I can teach you how to not burn them like this, if you’d like.”

“That’d be great!” said Apple Bloom. “Actually, we had a question for you, Draco. Do you want to go sledding with us?”

“YES!” Twilight screamed, slamming the door behind me.

I faced the crusaders with a nervous grin. “Sorry about that. I’m driving her even crazier than usual. If I ever get my powers, I’m granting her an all-expenses-paid vacation somewhere.” I started to walk with the Crusaders. “You know, I’ve never been sledding before. This should be fun.”

Half an hour later, I pulled myself out of a snow bank, and shook the snow out of my fur like a dog. I looked around, and spotted three larges lumps of snow. I hauled the Crusaders to their hooves, and dusted the snow off of them. “Well. That was quite a ride.” We started heading back to town. “I’ve never seen a sled catch fire before.” After a pause, I said, “You’re lucky the pond hadn’t frozen.”

“Do you think we could get our sled back?” asked Scootaloo.

“Unless I turn out to be part tuna, we’re not getting it back until at least spring, if ever. Sorry. In a few minutes, I get to explain to your sisters that I nearly got you all killed. I am, technically speaking, the adult here.”

“It wasn’t your fault!” said Sweetie Belle.

“Thanks, but try explaining that to your sisters and Twilight. I’m never going to be allowed outside again.”

Surprisingly, the CMC got a bit more of a chewing-out than I did, but we were all in big trouble for the next week.

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The week of Hearths’ Warming Eve, Spike found me staring dejectedly at a pile of fabric and stuffing that looked like a crazed cat had gone on the offensive. There were a few pieces of fluff stuck in my claws.

“What happened here?” Spike asked with wide eyes.

I chuckled nervously. “I’d read up on Hearths’ Warming dolls, and well … long story short … it didn’t end well.” I coughed into my paw. “I may have one or ten issues with controlling my temper.”

Spike simply raised an eyebrow, and didn’t say a word. He then walked out of the room. He returned about five minutes later, carrying a large bundle of different colored fabrics, and some more stuffing and thread. He sat down, and began to cut out shapes.

“What are you-”

Spike raised a claw. “Hush!” he said in a tone just like Rarity’s. I hushed. Half an hour of busy sewing later, Spike held something up for my inspection. It was a grey tube, with a yellow neck, with some blue fabric sewn onto the round head, and bits of shredded black and white fabric sticking out the back. There were some tubes that were the same colors as my arms sticking out of the sides, and the same for my legs. One button eye was black, the other was blue. There was a blue triangle and a yellow triangle sticking out of the head.

Spike rubbed the scales on the back of his neck, a blush showing through his scales. “Rarity taught me to sew about a year ago, and I kept it up from there.”

I held up the mini-me with delight. “It’s perfect! Looks just like me. Thank you. I’ll go put it on the mantel.” It looked a little strange next to two pony dolls and a dragon doll, but somehow it fit.

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Hearths’ Warming morning, everypony came down the stairs to find me curled around the tree, my eyes closed, breathing slowly.

“Did he actually manage to get to sleep for once?” whispered Starlight.

“No.” I said without opening my eyes. “I just got bored waiting up all night for all of you, so I thought I’d rest for a bit. At least I can do that.” I slithered away from the tree, and stood up, cracking my back. “How y’all doin’?” I asked with a wide eager smile.

“Fine, thanks. I take it that the over-grown five-year-old noodle wants to open his presents?” Starlight asked with a warm smile.

I shrugged. “Sure, if you all want to.” I then frowned. “I spent the entire night watching the fireplace, and Santa Hooves never showed up. I was sort of hoping to meet a magic reindeer.”

“You know you won’t see him if you’re awake, right?” said Spike.

“Not my fault I haven’t slept in almost four months.” I muttered.

Twilight smiled, and said, “Well, I guess we can open gifts early this year. There’s a party tonight, hope you all have fun.” She gave me a Look. “It would be a great opportunity to socialize, you have heard that word before, right Draco?” I rolled my eyes. Everypony started to swap gifts from underneath the tree.

Starlight passed me something long wrapped in brown paper. I opened it, and found a ten-foot-long scarf, that was a slate grey with black and white stripes and tassels. I whistled. “This must have taken you forever!”

She shrugged. “Actually, a quick dose of autos-creatis helped it to do itself. I could have sworn I’ve seen you knitting late at night, so I thought you’d like something.”

“Three a.m. is a really boring time of day.” I passed her something semi-rectangular. “I don’t know much about these, but the salespony in the shop said that it’s the best they make.

Starlight ripped off the paper. Her jaw dropped. “Oh. My. Gosh!” she said with a slight squeal. “The Hawkglider 3,000 with reinforced bracing and genuine spider silk string! This is the best kite on the market! Where did you get this?!”

“It took a bit of looking. I’m glad you like it.”

“I love it!” Starlight said with stars shining in her eyes.

I then passed Spike something small that was wrapped to look like a piece of hard candy. He unwrapped it. He held up a Batmane action figure, with included batfrisbee shooter. He whistled.

“A thank you for lending me your comics.”

“Thanks! It’s great. Actually, I’ve had my eyes on this one for a while. How’d you know I wanted it?” A guilty look crossed my face, but I didn’t reply. “Magic,” I said with a weak smile. I’d actually semi-stalked him to the toy store, and seen him gaze longingly at the figure many times.

“How can you afford two expensive gifts?” Twilight asked with interest.

“Uh, well, I uh, I do odd jobs around town, and it, it sort of just adds up. I think I’ve saved up about 5,000 bits.” Twilight’s jaw dropped.

Spike passed me his gift to me, I gave it a quick rattle next to my ear, and opened it. Inside was a strange-looking gem that changed color in the light. “It’s a mood-gem,” Spike explained, “When somepony’s really upset, it’s enchanted to help them calm down. I thought you could use it.”

“Heh. Yeah, I really could. Thanks buddy.”

Twilight and I held up identical rectangular packages. I raised a brow, and we exchanged them. Twilight opened hers first. It was a journal, with the word “Stories” on the cover. I looked a bit embarrassed. “Uh, sorry about them penman – the penponyship, but you guys haven’t invented gel-pens yet, and as I said, quills aren’t my forte.” Twilight opened it, and flipped through a few pages. “I figured since you’ve most likely read every book in creation, I should make you one. You said you might like to read some of my stories. I should warn you, they’re not entirely healthy to read in one go.”

Twilight smiled. “That’s a really thoughtful gift, thank you. Here you go.” She levitated my package over. Inside was an old-fashioned bound book, entitled Equestrian Myths and Legends: A Complete Collection. “You said you liked stories,” Twilight said with a smile.

I ran my fingers over the cover. “I do, yes. Thank you. I can’t wait to start this.” After finishing exchanging gifts, everypony started to prepare for the party at the castle that evening.

As ponies started to enter and decorate the castle, I couldn’t help but laugh at the fact that there was yet another impromptu musical number. It was actually pretty uplifting. Most of the ponies around town were getting used to my presence, but I was still more comfortable hanging off to the side with a mug of hot chocolate.

As I was headed for the kitchen for a refill, I overheard Doctor Whooves say to Twilight, “You really should have seen the first Hearths’ Warming! It was absolutely fantastic!”

Twilight raised a brow. “You make it sound like you were there.”

“He was,” I said, finishing off the last drop of my drink.

The Doctor looked at me nervously. “I have no idea what you’re talking abou-”

“Sneaking into your cottage from the inside of a big blue box in the wee hours of the morning isn’t exactly subtle, Lord Doctor of Gallopfrey,” I said with a smile. “Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. You do need to do a better job parking though. Who knows? Once I’m officially a Draconequus, I might see you, ‘Out There.’ I think I’d like that. Excuse me, I need a top up.”

As the party started to wrap up, Rainbow Dash called, “Hey! Halvsies! A bunch of us are going caroling, you want to come with us?”

“It’s not really my thing, and I did tell you I don’t sing,” I started to protest.

“Oh, really?” asked Starlight teasingly. “I hear you singing to yourself all the time. They’re pretty strange songs.”

“I am not giving up my favorite songs just because I live in a different universe now,” I huffed.

“You sounded pretty good when you sang with us that one time,” Rainbow said, “Your voice being split can do cool things. We could really use a bass, and you’re half that, right?”

I folded my arms, and smirked. “I’m not getting out of this one, am I?”

“Nope!” the whole group called with bright smiles. Rainbow then dragged me out of the castle by my scarf. As we went door to door, I got to be more comfortable with the sound of my split voice singing. With some experimentation, I realized I could sound like a digitally edited song, and after that I went all out with the group, smiling the whole way through.

When we got back to the castle, I collapsed into a couch, laughing brightly. “Have fun?” asked Twilight.

I nodded. “Actually yes. I haven’t had that much fun singing in years.”

Twilight gave me a small hug. “Happy Hearths’ Warming.”

“Happy Hearths’ Warming Twi.”

When everypony had gone to bed, I sat up, looking at the blinking lights, actually grateful I couldn’t sleep, and could make a great day last longer.

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At the beginning of the new year, Twilight noticed me pacing restlessly. “What’s up? It can’t be the weather this time.”

I shook my head. I looked all around me, opened some cupboards, checked under the table, and took a few books off a shelf.

“Draco, what are you doing?” Twilight said in a bemused tone.

“Checking for Pinkie Pie. That mare’s got better hearing than I do.” I walked over to Twilight, leaned down, and whispered in her ear, “It’s my birthday. I’m twenty-two, hooray for me and all that. Please don’t tell anypony.”

Twilight beamed. “Why didn’t you tell me your birthday was coming up! We could-”

I clamped a paw over her mouth. “No. We couldn’t.” I said firmly. “I never really liked celebrating it, and all you ponies do is party. I’m not giving you an excuse to have another one, just because it happens to be the day I was born. In another universe. Far, far away.”

Twilight removed the offending paw. “You don’t even want presents? It’s your birthday, for crying out loud. Celebrate it!”

“I’ll live without presents. I prefer to celebrate it quietly; can I ask you to respect that?”

“Fine,” Twilight grumbled. “I’m still going to try and help you have a good day.”

I sighed. “We don’t we just cover Chapter Fifteen of Spearhorn’s Advanced Magical Restructuring? I’m learning lots of magic theory, and a bit more couldn’t hurt. Besides, I’m actually starting to find it interesting.”

Twilight sighed. “Fine. I expect exquisite notes. You know where the book is, have fun. If you’d rather stay inside and study on your birthday, that’s fine.”

“Said the black hole to the kettle. I doubt you went out much when you were young either.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. I walked into the library, and got to work. After about an hour, over the scratching of my pencil, I heard six or seven muffled voices. I wasn’t Sherlock Hooves, but it didn’t take much effort to leap to a logical conclusion.

Spike walked into the library, wearing an apron. “Hi, Draco! You want some lunch?”

“Like I couldn’t smell this set-up a mile away… Sure, I’d love some. I’ll be right there.” I finished the equation I was on, and slammed my pencil down.

As I walked into the library, I snarled, “Twilight, I said I do not want a-” Twilight was sitting in a chair on the side of the room, flipping through a book. “All right, where are they?”

“Where are who?” Twilight asked.

“Drop the act, I heard everypony talking in the hall. What part of ‘I have supernaturally good hearing’ does nopony get?” I paced the hall, examining every nook and cranny, keeping an ear out for voices. Nothing. I faced Twilight again. “As a rule, I don’t hallucinate, but I must have this time. I thought everypony was planning a surprise party, but I can see I was wrong. I’m sorry I got all huffy, thanks for respecting my wishes. You mentioned lunch, Spike?”

“Yep!” the little drake said, “Right this way.”

We headed downstairs into the kitchen. “SURPRISE!” I rolled my eyes.

Pinkie slightly defied gravity, and strapped a party hat onto my head. “Aw! Cheer up! Your birthday’s only one day a year!”

“So are three-hundred-sixty-four other days. Surely you don’t celebrate all those?”

“No, that’d be silly. I got your favorite cake!”

“How’d you do that in under an hour?”

“Well, I took two cups of flour, three eggs, some chocolate, and-”

“I get it! Oh, alright, it’s not like you didn’t all go to a lot of trouble for this, and it is my birthday. Thank you, I’ll cheer up in a minute.”

“That’s the spirit!” cried Pinkie. She then snickered a bit. “A Spirit, having spirit! That’s hilarious!”

“Har, har.”

“Wanna play Twister?” Pinkie asked eagerly.

“Just one game, you’re too good for me.”

“I’ll take it easy on you this time, promise!”

As Pinkie wiped the floor with me at Twister, somepony dropped a record into a gramophone, and everypony started dancing. I noticed with some amusement that Rarity and Spike were dancing together.

I was hanging by the punchbowl, simply tapping my lion’s paw to the song. “Hey, Halvsies, aren’t you going to dance?” asked Rainbow Dash.

I shook my head. “You all got me to sing, but I won’t dance. I can’t dance to save my life.”

“Oh, come on, I’ll bet you can totally dance!”

I sighed, and set my cup down. I swept over to her, grabbed her hoof, and pulled Rainbow onto her hindlegs. I twirled her around so fast, she looked like a blue tornado. As her eyes were still rolling around in her head, I quickly dipped her almost to the floor, then pulled her up, and lifted her above me for a quick sweep through the air, before setting her back on all fours.

Rainbow’s mouth dropped open. “How’d you do that?”

“That was just some sped-up slow dance moves, and you’re a lot lighter than any dance partner I’ve had. I can’t fast dance at all.”

Rainbow chuckled. “Dude, you really need to stop doubting yourself. That was actually pretty cool, thanks for the dance.” I bowed formally, which made her laugh more.

“Who wants cake?!” Pinkie Pie sang.

When I walked over, she held up the cake. “C’mon! Make a wish, and blow out the candles. Twenty-two, right?”

I nodded, and blew out the candles.

“What did you wish for?” asked Starlight.

“That would be telling, but, I think I’ve already got it.”

“Are you sure you don’t want presents?” asked Spike, “It’s a little weird.”

“In a few centuries when you’re an adult, you’ll understand that it’s really just another day. Come on, I actually want to dance a bit, but don’t say I didn’t warn you all…”

As the rest of the day passed, I finally loosened up, and managed to have a great birthday.

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One morning in mid-March, Twilight heard something next to her. She opened her eyes, to find me about an inch from her face.

“GAAAAHH!” she screamed.

“Morning! It’s a great morning, isn’t it? I’m so excited! This is going to be great! I’ve been waiting for this for two months! This is going to be even better than Hearts and Hooves day, not that that day made much difference in my life. Come on! Are you just going to sleep all day?”

Twilight blinked slowly. “Draco, it’s before dawn,” she croaked. “How are you this hyper, even for you?”

“It’s Winter Wrap Up!” I held up a bunch of objects. “Boots, earmuffs, scarf, winter saddle, Organizer’s vest, massive checklist, quill and ink. Did I forget anything? I tried to wake up Spike, but he sort of bit me, and went back to sleep.” I shrugged. “Fair’s fair.” Twilight groaned, and went back to sleep. I yanked the quilt off of her. “Come on!” she didn’t open her eyes, but she did zap me back into my room. “You’ll have to wake up eventually!” I called.

When the rest of the castle did wake up, I was hopping from hoof to paw with excitement.

“SomeDraconequus is excited,” Starlight said with a yawn.

“I get the sun back!! How could I not be excited for that?”

Starlight chuckled. “Some of us have to sleep, which means it takes a little longer for us to be ready in the morning. You didn’t break into Twilight’s stash of coffee, did you? Even for you, you’re pretty manic.”

“No, I’ve never really wanted to try coffee, and now I don’t actually need it. I’ll meet you all outside! Bye!” I pulled on my too-small vest, and swept outside.

When the rest of the town got outside, I said “Hello” to the ponies I was getting to know a bit. Starlight had joined Twilight on the organizing team, the two of them were nearly unstoppable together.

Since I couldn’t use magic, and couldn’t fly, I was on the Earth Pony team. It was quickly agreed that, given my klutziness, for everypony’s safety, I shouldn’t skate to break up the ice. Animals didn’t really cozy up to me, so I was on the plowing and planting team. It took a while to figure out how to hook me up to the plow. I couldn’t pull it while standing up, I was too big. Finally, I thought to just walk on all fours, and fit into the harness fairly well.

After that, we were off. I even got to lead our group’s part of the chorus with my weird singing.

After the town was done ushering in spring, I asked, “OK, I’m starting to figure out the singing bit, but how do you all coordinate your dance moves that well? Do you all practice when I’m not looking?”

Everypony laughed. “It looks like you’ve gotten a lot more comfortable singing in public,” Twilight teased.

“Well, I always enjoyed singing, and being able to sing in harmony with myself makes it a lot cooler.”

Applejack walked up to me. “Well, fer lookin’ like a limp noodle, ya sure can pull yer weight. Yer row’s perfectly straight too!”

“Thank you very much.” I spotted something by the trees. “Would you all excuse me for a minute?”

I walked over, and caught Discord’s attention. He was wearing a red baseball cap, with the word, “Supervisor” stitched into it, and was busy writing on a clipboard. He looked miserable.

“What’s up? Are you helping with Winter Wrap Up?”

He shook his head. “No, I’m supposed to be giving a progress report on you, just pretend I’m not here.” He stroked his beard, and grinned. “Actually, since it’s officially spring now, I thought I’d give you this.”

He passed me a small blue flower. The ponies who spotted it screamed, and ran away. Confused, I asked, “What’s so bad about a flow- WAH-CHOO!” My whole body tingled. Discord flew into the air, writhing like a snake, clutching his sides, and laughing hysterically. I looked down. All of the colors that made me up had somehow been inverted. Given my usual color-scheme, I looked very strange indeed. I snickered twice, then started to laugh as hard as Discord.

Discord looked at me with interest. “Most ponies don’t find Poison Joke funny when it happens to them.”

“I look ridiculous! That’s a great joke! I really just look like my opposite, which isn’t so bad. I wonder what opposite me would be like?’

Discord grinned, “I could always-”

“NO. I’m not dimension-hopping yet, but thanks for the offer.”

Discord pouted. “It’s a lot of fun, once you figure out how to do it.”

“I’m sure it is. Go give your report, you menace.”

“Flatterer.” He disappeared in a flash of light.

I picked up the flower, and buried it in the woods, before it could prank somepony else.

When I got back to the castle, Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Poison Joke?” she asked flatly.

“Eeyep.”

She sighed. “Well, the only soap we have enough of for you to take a bubble bath with is mine. I’ll go start the water.”

“Uh, it’s not that I have anything against lavender per se, it’s just that I’d rather not smell like it. I’ve got an over-sensitive nose now.”

“Well, it’s that, or wait a week until we go shopping. You’re making my eyes water, could you just go take the bath?”

I acknowledged defeat, and went upstairs and climbed into the tub. After drying myself off, I was back to my normal colors, but all my fur was puffing out ridiculously. Somehow, someway, I’ll get Discord back for this. I then grinned evilly. Besides, I’ve got all Eternity to hatch a scheme!

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In late April, Twilight, Starlight, and Spike were called away to Canterlot to give a report on magically-laid traps and how to avoid them to Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns.

Twilight was the first to arrive home that evening, Starlight and Spike had stayed behind about an hour to help the students clean up.

When Twilight walked into the castle, she stopped. She looked around. She was expecting it to be mostly empty, but every single light was turned off, and all the blinds were closed. She then heard a split voice whose tone made her blood chill slightly.

“Dear Princess Celestia,” my voices echoed from all around,

“I am writing to you to give my semi-monthly report on my student Draco.

I am somewhat concerned about him.

Although he has grown somewhat closer to the ponies around town, as well as my friends and I, he has not truly formed any genuine, close friendships with even a single pony. He handles his lessons well, and attacks them with enthusiasm, but they seem to have no effect. It’s as if he has no interest in forming close friendships.

As for the other part of his lessons, there has been no progress of any kind. He has absorbed, and even memorized, everything he has learned, but has not been able to put it to use. He still cannot perform even the simplest of magical feats, and seems to be less magical than an Earth Pony, as he cannot perform their special brand of magic either.

I am deeply troubled by his lack of progress, as he has been here, learning almost daily, for six months.

Part of me wonders if he is a lost cause.

I would appreciate any advice on the matter.

Your friend,

Twilight Sparkle”

“D-Draco?”

“Yes?” I asked, my voices clashing with each other.

“Where are you?”

“Behind you.” I hissed.

Twilight shrieked, and whirled around to face me, my irises slightly glowing in the dark. “How’d you sneak up on me?”

“Pony senses aren’t worth beans.” I held out the scroll, my fist clenched and shaking. “I’m a ‘lost cause?!’ I have ‘no interest in close friendships?!’ I haven’t learned anything?! What’re you going to do, banish me somewhere?!!” I snarled. By the end of that, my voices were clashing so badly, I sounded more like an animal than a person. I was shaking all over with anger, and clicking loudly in the back of my throat.

Twilight swallowed. “Draco, you don’t understand, that letter’s-”

“SAVE IT!!!” I roared. I shoved the letter into her hoof, and ran out the door, slamming it behind me.

After that, I just ran on all fours, not caring where I ended up. After a while, my steam ran out, and I was sitting on the bank of a river that flowed through town, although I was about a mile outside the town’s border.

I shouted at Twilight some more in my head, then at Celestia and Luna, and then at the gods for bringing me here in the first place. After a few minutes, my hatred turned inwards, and I was convinced Twilight was right, I was a lost cause, and should just give up trying. “I hate you,” I snarled at my reflection in the river. If my reflection did have the power to answer me back, it chose not to.

I heard a soft flapping of wings, and somepony landed behind me. “Hello Fluttershy,” I said without looking around.

“Oh. Um, how did you know it was me?”

“Your shampoo smells like strawberries.” I blinked as my brain caught up with my mouth. “Sorry, that came out a lot creepier than I intended. You can come a bit closer if you want, I’m not going to bite you, I’ve worked through most of it.” She cautiously came over, and sat down by me. “How’d you know where to find me?” I asked.

“Oh, Mrs. Foxingten came by my cottage, saying there was a monster in the wheat fields by the river.”

“‘Monster.’ That about sums it up.”

Fluttershy put a hoof over my paw. “You’re not a monster. Do you even know that?”

“Sometimes.” We were both silent for a minute.

Fluttershy then said, “I heard what happened. Is there anything I can do?” I shook my head. “Do you want to talk about it?” I shook my head harder. “You have to talk about it to somepony.” I scoffed. Fluttershy gave my paw a squeeze. “Just so you know, we may not be ‘B.F.F.s’, but I consider you a friend.”

“Thank you,” I said flatly. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to be alone right now, but I genuinely appreciate your trying to help.”

“My pleasure. Just so you know, Twilight wants to talk to you.”

“I can just imagine.”

“Well, have a better evening. Stay safe. If you do want to talk, my door’s always open.” She flew off in the direction of Ponyville.

Ten minutes later, a voice asked, “Lemonade?” I nearly jumped out of my skin.

“What do you want, Discord, here to give me another lesson in chaos magic? Those don’t end well, I always annoy you into leaving. Besides, I’ll never be able to do magic.”

“I just want to talk to you,” I’m supposed to keep an eye on you,” he said as he pulled an eyeball out of my ear. I didn’t laugh. He cast the eye into the grass. “No, I’m not here to give you a lesson, I don’t think chaos magic is going to work out for you, it’s my thing. That doesn’t mean you’ll never be able to do magic, it’ll come to you, and you’ll use it better than anyone else can use that type of magic. The way it comes to you might seem like a plot device, though.”

The brick wall popped up on the other side of the river. “Hello again,” I muttered gloomily.

“You can see that?” Discord asked with wide eyes. “Without even being able to use your magic?”

“Yeah. Is it what I think it is?”

“Let’s just say, ponies and Draconequui and other species who can see it … appreciate an audience. Can you see what’s past it?”

“Nope. I’m interested in breaking it, I think that’s your thing too.”

“Are you sure you don’t want the lemonade? It always makes me feel better. Chocolate milk is so five seasons ago.” I nodded.

Discord held up a glass, and a martini shaker, giving it a good shake. He then poured some lemonade into the glass. “Shaken, not stirred is the only way to do it,” he said catching my expression. That one did get a laugh out of me.

I took a gulp of the lemonade, and nearly hacked out a lung. Discord thumped me on the back. “Alright there?”

“It’s a little strong,” I wheezed. He laughed. “It’s good though,” I said as I drained the glass.

We just sat for a moment, before Discord said, “Do you really think that cutting yourself off from society because you got your feelings hurt is the answer? It never ends well.”

I pondered that for a minute. “It didn’t end well for you?”

Discord ruffled my mane. “See! I knew you were smarter then you looked.” He then frowned, and got a slightly haunted expression. “Why do you think I tried to turn Ponyville into the chaos capital of the world? Chaos was all I had left at that point. Ponies … don’t like things that are different, and it’s a rare creature who actually appreciates pure chaos. As for the other Draconequui … they … put up with me, because I’m so powerful, and my function is necessary, but … they consider me a wild card at best. I don’t always get on with them, so yes, I can be lonely at times, and yes, after a while, I was afraid to try and make friends.”

I didn’t know what to say to that.

Discord mused for a minute, then casually said, “You were a very … interesting human. You didn’t quite fit in, but at the same time, you were fine with that.”

I raked my claws into the grass, and growled slightly. “You looked me up?!”

Discord simply said, “I had to. Part of the job. Plus, I was interested in seeing what kind of person was brought here.” He chuckled darkly. “If those ponies knew what you were like under that sunny exterior …”

“Even you wouldn’t be that cruel. If not to me, then to them. I’ve mostly made peace with my past, and I’m better now.”

Discord didn’t reply to that. Instead, he said, “Take eons of experience talking to you, go back, apologize, and continue your studies. You’ve actually almost hit the nail on the head a few times, I’m surprised it hasn’t clicked already.” He then blinked. “I get that I’m supposed to be your mentor, but if you tell anypony, or anyDraconequus I bared my soul even slightly, or was this helpful, it won’t end well for you.”

“Deal. My lips are sealed.”

“I’ll talk to you later,” said Discord. Instead of some ridiculous stunt, or a flash of light, he was simply gone. It was the quietest I’d seen him.

I knew I had to head back eventually, so I decided to do it sooner rather than later.

When I got to the castle, Twilight flew up to my height, so that she could look me in the eye. Her eyes were aflame, I was worried she was going to pull her Rapidash routine on me.

“Do you know why you found that letter?” Twilight hissed in dangerous tones.

“Well, no, but I-”

Twilight pressed her snout right up against mine. “It’s because I. Didn’t. Send it!”

“I know, but I-”

“If you ever treat me or one of my friends like that again, I’ll-”

“I’M TRYING TO APOLOGIZE, YOU DUMB ALICORN!”

I then slapped my face with my paw, and covered my eyes. I was expecting the Wrath from the Thing On High. None came. After an awkward silence, I said, “Not just for flying off the handle over the letter, but for most of the last six months. I am … immature, irresponsible, irritating, incorrigible, infuriating, and completely impossible. And that’s just the ‘I’s.’ Without meaning too, I’ve put you through a personal hell, or whatever the equivalent afterlife is on this world. I’m surprised you haven’t magicked me into another dimension. I read one letter, and go completely berserk. I had no right to act like that, and I’m sorry.”

Twilight settled back onto the ground. She sighed. “I owe you an apology too, for writing that thing. That day, you had been driving me so far up the wall we were tap-dancing on the ceiling, and it was time for my monthly report. I needed to vent, and without meaning to, I wrote that. At the time, I meant most of it, but after rereading it, I realized I was wrong. You are making progress, and you do have close friendships, even if they’re a bit quiet. The actual letter I sent is much better, I’m sure I can get a copy.”

We just stood there for a minute. Then Twilight said, “We need to work on your apologies, but I think I can accept that. Can you accept mine?”

“Yes, thank you. I’m sorry again.”

Twilight chuckled. “Well, it’s been a long, slightly horrible day. Would you like to join me in a glass of chocolate milk?”

“Sure, but do you think we can both fit?”

Twilight threw a cushion at me. “No. More. Puns! You pest!”

After the drinks, Twilight said, “I think I’d like to continue your lessons. You’re almost as fast a learner as me, so it’s nice to be able to teach so quickly.”

“I’d like that. If you’ll have me. So. Are we still friends?”

“Definitely. Since you’ll be up the rest of the night, you can summarize the next chapter of the book you’re on.” I groaned. “You owe me big-time, so I expect flawless notes. I’m thinking a two-scroll summary ought to cover that apology.”

I saluted. “Yes’m. See you tomorrow. Night.”

“Goodnight, you exasperating noodle.”

By sheer coincidence, that night’s chapter was the most difficult I’d had to read. Twilight could do revenge well.