A loud banging was echoing through my ship, as I was walking to the door I readied the handgun. My arm angled it downward and kicked the button my with right foot, sunlight poured in and I saw Twilight ready to unleash another fury of knocks. Our eyes met and I lowered the gun to tuck it in my waistband.
“What is the reason that you're attempting to knock my door down?”
“I was hoping that you would be interested in going to the lake this midday,” I rolled my tongue across my teeth in thought. Within a moment I answered her thing with a short sweet answer.
“Sure, where is this lake?”
“It’s past Ponyville to the north west.”
“Should I bring anything?”
“You don't have to if you don't want to…”
“Cool, see you later.” I shut the door and had a small inquiry on what to bring. What was I going to bring, eh fuck it! I’ll bring a cake or something.
I was heading to the lake with the Napoleon cake wrapped in cellophane. I heard the ponies and occasional human whisper behind my back, most of it was simple curiosity while some was hate and fear. I ignored most of it some I took to heart, I knew I was being stared at and I felt goosebumps rise and my neck hair rose. A small burst of adrenaline fueled my paranoia, my heartbeat banged in my ears as I sped up my walk to a slow jog. As I leave the stone path and enter the dirt path leaving the town I felt better and my hair went down, I could hear splashes and laughter. Passing a line of trees the beach clearing came into view. Ponies were frolicking in the water and humans soaked up some sun while sleeping.
“Alexandy!” Shouted the pink pony that defied physics.
“Hello Pinkie, it's good to see you after all that time.” As she appeared to my right I was dragged through the sand, my feet made trenches as I was drug. Soon, however, I was dropped to the ground on a large red blanket. I mumbled a small ow as I sat up, my hand rubbed my nose as I made it feel better. I quickly noted that my cake was gone and I looked around until I found Pinkie head first in it. I would've been angry but I needed to know how she could put her head into a three inch tall cake. I opened my mouth but, surprisingly Jame responded.
“Just don't, I never understood it and you won't either.” With that I flopped on to the ground to relax.
With a loud thump I felt a fluffy head rest on my shoulder. As I looked over I felt anger rise as my vision was covered in pink curly hair, I was about to push her off when I saw something shiny. I reached my right hand out, what I grabbed was a piece of gold. Not a coin but a lump of gold sitting there, but it was never easy to grab gold because I soon heard growling. Looking to my left I found the source, a large black monster with tubes for mouthes. As my gaze met its it roared, my heart pumped full of adrenaline as it lunged at me.
*Outside of the Hair*
All of the group stared at the kicking legs sticking out of Pinkie’s hair.
“What’s he doin’ in there?” Asked Applejack with confusion on her face.
Pinkie replied, through giggles, “I don't know but it tickles!”
*Back in the Hair*
My hands were holding the beast's face from mine as I screamed, “HELP! PLEASE HELP ME!” With a loud grunt of effort I launched the beast five feet away from me. With it away I started to crawl backwards , but it quickly recovered and drug me back in. Now with my legs in I could stand up but I felt smaller and the hair looked larger. Before I could contemplate my surroundings I heard clicking and I noticed I was surrounded by more of those things. I did the only I could do, run away while screaming.
*Out of the Hair*
It had been ten minutes after Alexander’s legs disappeared in Pinkie’s hair. All of them were worried, “Shouldn't we try and help?” Whispered the quiet Fluttershy, with a ungodly smile and a violent flapping of her head a pink hand went into the jungle.
I had been running for what felt like hours, leaning up on a pink tree I breathed in and out in an attempt to calm down. But it got darker and colder, more panic started to rise and I turned in time to see a large pink hand reach for me. The thumb and index finger gripped me and threw me in the air. The sound of waves and beach birds got my ears as I hit the sand. I was greatly confused, I rolled to my back while delighted to see the blue sky. I grinned for I had survived the improbable! I gazed at the sky and just enjoyed being alive, everything was like heaven. The ground soft and the air diabetes sweet, I was happy. Soon, however, I sat up with three back pops and a single neck pop.
“So….I miss anything cool?” Silence met my ears, I guess that's a no. Now I stood and looked for a changing room, spotting none I asked. “So where can I change?”
Rarity, with comically sized sunglasses, replied “Change into what dear?”
“Uhh swim clothes.”
Her hand moved the sunglasses down and her eyes did a quick once over. “No offense dear but you don't look like a swimmer.” My eyes narrowed, as a man that lived near the Average Lakes and the Ohio Gorge, now walking to the nearest patch of bushes and trees I changed into the blue shorts. My bare feet hit the warm sand with a flop and it felt good. My eyes burned a hole of hatred into Rarity’s head as I glared at her all the way to the water’s edge.
When I passed her she followed me as I took step after step into the lukewarm water. Very soon I was neck high, my left arm raised and have her the one finger salute before diving under. The water didn't sting as I opened them to look around, the water was a crystal clear blue and the plants a lovely dark green. In around fifteen seconds I surfaced for air. I floated in the middle of the lake ponies were swimming around and yelling something about not seeing him. Pegasi were flying in circles yelling the same, I shrugged my shoulders and relaxed as my body floated up. Now I know it's irresponsible to sleep when in water but I was tired so I dozed off. I landed on the sand and felt the wind chill my body.
“He's Not breathing!” This piqued my interest and I opened my eyes in time to see a male pony’s mouth going to mine. I've been in a situation similar to this and let me tell you it's not fun, so I did the only thing I could do. Punched him in the face. The pony held his face in shock as I was crowded by six ponies and a single human all with worried faces.
“WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!” Shouted, unexpectedly, Fluttershy.
“To prove a point.” I replied with a smug grin as her left eye twitched. The crowd dispersed and I went back to the blanket to not cause another “incident.” As I relaxed a small thump and the sound of spraying sand was next to me. I looked over and saw a potato just sitting there. My brain finally broke, I reached out and grabbed it but as I did so bluish green lines appeared around my hands and I went flying.
My thoughts as I soared through the air were simple, “Huh guess I'm being kidnapped now.”