//------------------------------//
// Terrified 
// Story: Grief is the Price We Pay 
// by Scyphi 
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            Starlight was the only one who could find amusement in the matter, though. Trixie was heavily embarrassed that she had been pretty much caught in such an awkward situation that was no longer so secret. Thorax felt the same, but was much more concerned about how much all of this bothered Spike. Clearly, he was trying to keep it more or less to himself now, but as a changeling, Thorax could perceive more about Spike’s feelings on the matter than most and knew it was a matter that still deeply troubled him…and yet he was now choosing to effectively turn a blind eye to it, or at least attempting to. Odder still, there was also a sense of reluctance in Spike’s emotions like this wasn’t something he really wanted to do but still felt he didn’t have a choice. It left Thorax somewhat baffled—why was Spike trying so hard to stay out of it now when he had shown so little restraint in not doing so before, even after Thorax had requested Spike try not to be so venomous about it to Trixie at the very least, especially when it clearly seemed he still wanted to?

            Unfortunately, clear answers were not forthcoming quickly, as Thorax noticed shortly thereafter, while assisting Starlight in preparing a light breakfast, that Spike was trying to avoid him, or at least as much as one could on an airship this small. More accurately, he was avoiding speaking directly with Thorax. He would permit being the in same room as Thorax when necessary, but he was clearly avoiding speaking to him, preferring to say whatever he needed to at a given moment to someone else over Thorax where possible. When he did speak to Thorax, it was generally kept simple, and he’d change the subject or just cease talking altogether if Thorax tried to move the topic elsewhere. It frustrated Thorax, because it left him unsure how he could possibly proceed and didn’t know what else to do.

            And the fact that it bothered him by extension started to bother Trixie too, who was starting to feel responsible. When she noticed Thorax wasn’t making much headway in addressing the matter, let alone resolve it, Trixie had a small inward debate then quietly decided to herself that she would try and do something about it on her own, setting off in search of Spike. Since getting up that morning, Spike had been fairly restless, continuously moving from spot to spot on the airship as if he couldn’t settle on a place he wanted to be. But the airship wasn’t especially large of course, so it didn’t take long before Trixie found him, first spying him leaning on the aft railing of the airship through the navigation room’s rear window. Going quietly so to not draw attention to herself, she stepped out of the deckhouse and then walked around it to the back of the main deck where the dragon remained, not noticing her approach. Trixie stopped a couple feet away from him, not wanting to get too close out of respect for him, and watched him in silence for a moment, trying to gauge the dragon’s present mood. Failing that, she finally chose to speak up.

            “Spike?” she prompted quietly.

            Spike jumped and twisted around to look at her briefly. “Oh, it’s you,” he grumbled, twisting back to look out over the railing, removing his false eyeglasses so one arm could come up and rub at his face quickly.

            Trixie didn’t get enough of a chance to see during that brief second he had turned to face her so she couldn’t be certain, but with a twinge of guilt and worry, she wondered suddenly if Spike had been quietly crying. Fearing what would happen if she guessed wrong on that though, she opted not to ask, and instead sought a new topic with which to engage in conversation. “Starlight’s working on something for breakfast for all of us,” she said, vaguely pointing one hoof behind her. “She’ll probably have it ready soon.”

            “Right,” Spike replied curtly, returning his glasses to his face again. Trixie wondered briefly why he was still wearing them if they were only part of a now useless disguise. “Going to tell me what it is she’s making?”

            “Uh, some kind of granola cereal thing she’s cobbled together.”

            “Oh goody, that sounds positively scrumptious.”

            Trixie wrinkled her snout at Spike’s sarcastic tone. “Oh, don’t be like that. At least Starlight’s working at mixing in a few gems into it for you and Ember, so…”

            “Well, I’ll be down to get it in a few either way,” Spike interrupted, glancing back at her with narrowed eyes. “Was that all?”

            Trixie hesitated, kicking at the deck of the airship with one hoof, debating. Finally she sighed and pressed on regardless. “Look, Spike,” she said, getting to the point. “I know we never got off on the right hoof, and I know I’ve…done some not nice things to you and others in the past, but…I’m sorry for all of it.” She winced to herself. “I’d…list it all out more precisely, but…looking back, it occurs to me there’s a fair bit of it, and…and I wouldn’t want to accidentally forget one, so…” she stopped herself there, realizing she wasn’t making things better, and started over. “Look, I get it, you’re not happy with me right now, but can we maybe try to fix that?”

            “You were never the problem, Trixie,” Spike retorted with a snort, turning to face her fully finally.

            Trixie was momentarily taken aback. “Really?” she asked, confused. “But…” she tilted her head at Spike. “…do you mean it’s Thorax, then?”

            Spike averted his gaze, suddenly looking both sad and apologetic. “Thorax is just being Thorax, and I certainly can’t blame him for doing that.”

            “But you’re still not happy with that…are you?”

            Spike didn’t reply.

            Trixie sighed. “…look, Spike…” she bit her lip. “…I don’t want to stand in the way of your friendship with Thorax, and I’m not trying to.”

            Spike closed his eyes for a second before starting to walk off for the other side of the deck, moving past Trixie. But as he did, he said one final thing. “Honestly, Trixie? It’s not you I want to hear that from.”

            He then stalked off vanishing behind the other side of the deckhouse, leaving Trixie behind. She turned to watch him go, brow drooping in concern as she considered what little Spike had said on the matter, and eventually was forced to conclude that, whatever needed to be done to sort this out, Trixie wasn’t the one who needed to do it. She went back below deck where Thorax was, still assisting Starlight, and relayed this to him.

            “You need to talk to him,” she told him.

            “Don’t you think I’ve been trying?” Thorax replied back. “If he really wanted me to do come and talk with him, he wouldn’t be trying so hard to avoid both that and me.”

            Trixie frowned. “You think he doesn’t want to sort this out?”

            Thorax shook his head sadly. “Worse. I fear he’s given up trying.”

            Trixie gazed at him for a moment then put a hoof on his shoulder. “Hey…even if that’s the case…I don’t think you should give up on it just yet.”

            Thorax regarded Trixie then looked at her hoof. He gently brushed it off his shoulder, but he did so with an appreciative look in his solid blue eyes. “Thank you for trying to help, Trixie,” he said.

            They left it at that, the two turning back to their separate activities. Thorax spent the time debating to himself how he could try and sort things out with Spike, or at least get talking with him without Spike trying to brush him off, unwilling to listen, but he still remained uncertain how he could do so, fearing he might still have no success. So as he continued assisting Starlight with breakfast, he quietly brought up the subject with her, hoping she could give him some advice.

            “Well, you’ve really only got two options at this point,” Starlight admitted a little dejectedly, knowing this wasn’t going to be especially helpful. “You can either try and force a confrontation and hope that actually helps to smooth things over and not make it worse, or you can just hold off, give Spike some distance, and hope he’ll come to you whenever he’s ready to talk.”

            Thorax grunted, unsatisfied with those options. “Neither are exactly ideal, are they?” he grumbled.

            Starlight gave him a sympathetic look. “Unfortunately, it’s the best I’ve got, and when you really think about it, any way you approach it is going to fall into one of those general two categories.” She sighed. “I can understand your hesitation though…both have the danger of only making things worse, and of course, none of us want that.” She glanced back at Thorax. “If it helps, I was able to speak with him last night and smooth a few of our personal things over, and to do it, I chose to face him directly and force a confrontation, and that seems to have worked out okay…he’s at least being more cordial around me now. But even then…I had to dance on the line for most of that, and it could’ve gone either way still.”

            “I’m glad it went well for you regardless,” Thorax stated, glancing back at her. “I was hoping you and Spike could make some amends. I’m just sorry it took a gamble to do it.”

            “Yes, well, admittedly at that point I didn’t exactly have a great deal to lose,” Starlight admitted to herself. “If it had gone wrong, it would’ve only made Spike mad at me, and considering he was already that going in, it wouldn’t have changed things much, I guess. It’s not the same for you, though. You’re his friend…and that friendship could end up on the line with just one wrong step.”

            “I fear it already is,” Thorax mumbled aloud.

            Starlight watched him thoughtfully for a second. “That friendship really does mean a lot to the two of you, doesn’t it?” she asked.

            “You have to understand Starlight, there were some days when that friendship was all we had,” Thorax answered, and sighed himself. “Well…at any rate, I’m just going to have to keep an eye on things and try and do what I can to keep things stable for now.”

            Starlight placed a reassuring hoof on his shoulder. “I hope that no matter what, things work out for the both of you,” she said. She then turned back to the makeshift granola she had been prepping and after making a few final touches to the large mixing bowl of it that she had been making, she dusted off her hooves. “Well, this is about ready anyway. I suppose one of us ought to go fetch Ember…”

            “I’ll go take over the helm from her and send her on down,” Thorax volunteered automatically, moving to leave and head above deck.

            Starlight turned to watch him depart. “Are you going to be coming for breakfast too?” she asked.

            Thorax shook his head, but gave her polite grin. “Honestly, I’m not that hungry…I think I’ve had my fill already.” Indeed, his two-chambered stomach already felt full and content with a healthy supply of positive emotion that he had managed to passively collect at some point, probably throughout the night. He opted not to mention that it probably stemmed from his and Trixie’s sleep during the night, nor did he mention that the high-fiber granola probably would agree less with his changeling digestion than most other solid foods would. “So don’t worry about me…go ahead and eat without me. Besides, someone still needs to tend to the helm, so it might as well be me.”

            And with that, he headed on up and into the control cabin above deck, finding Ember still standing at the helm and keeping the Vergilius on course as instructed. “Hello, Dragon Lord Ember,” he greeted as he arrived and strolled up to join her at the helm. “I can take over now while you go below to get some—”

            “Oh, there you are!” Ember abruptly interrupted, whirling to look at Thorax impatiently. “I’ve been waiting for you to show up! It’s about time you finally pulled yourself off of Trixie!”

            Thorax stopped short at this comment and tried to suppress a groan, his expression a mixture between embarrassed and frustrated that it seemed everyone on the airship already knew where he and Trixie had been at during the night. “Look, nothing happened, it’s not at all as it looks—”

            “Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Ember interrupted again, not interested in hearing Thorax’s explanation, instead locking the helm controls and grabbing Thorax by one holed hoof so to drag him in front of the controls, but turning him so he faced away from the controls and back at the rest of the control cabin’s interior. “You stay there, and don’t you dare move.” She then about faced and proceeded out the deckhouse exit for the main deck before Thorax could even finish processing what had happened. “I’ll be right back.”

            Thorax blankly watched her go for a second, feeling lost as to what it was the dragoness was trying to do. After a couple of seconds though, he started to twist around and look over things in the control cabin. He had begun to face the helm again to make sure everything was operating smoothly and that they were still on course (they were) when Ember reentered and, to Thorax’s surprise, was bodily carrying Spike in her arms.

            “Ember, put me down!” Spike cried, protesting to what Ember was doing.

            The cry seemed to fall on deaf ears though as Ember turned her attention to Thorax upon entering and noticed he had turned to face the helm again. “Oi!” she cried, snapping her claws to get his attention. “Eyes forward on us, not the steering wheel!”

            Thorax quickly twisted around to face away from the helm as she had first positioned him again, realizing that going against Ember’s demands at the moment might be unwise right now.

            Ember then plopped the still-objecting Spike down in front him. “There!” she declared with finality. She pointed a claw at Spike. “Now you tell him,” she moved her claw to point at Thorax, “what you” the claw moved back to Spike and then onto herself, “told me last night. And don’t either of you leave this room until you’ve got it sorted out, got it?”

            “But…” Thorax started to object.

            “I’m not…” Spike also started to protest in the same instant.

            “Ahshshsh!” Ember interrupted, shushing them both. “Neither of you leave until then, so sayeth me!” She then turned to exit again, this time heading below deck.

            “But what about my breakfast?” Spike objected hotly.

            “Fine,” Ember relented as she started down the steps, jabbing a claw at them both once more. “But don’t move.”

            She then vanished below deck for a moment. This was soon followed by a distant clattering sound, accompanied by a vocal objection from Starlight, before Ember reappeared on the steps, only going up them far enough so that her head and upper torso poked over the steps, allowing her to set down a bowl filled with granola and a few gems haphazardly stuck into it then slide it across the wooden deck until it bumped into Spike’s leg, scattering a few small pieces of the granola as it went.

            “There!” Ember declared. “Talk while you eat if you must. Just talk already, you two!”

            She then left. Spike and Thorax stared in the direction of the steps then glanced at each other, Thorax warily and Spike grumpily.

            “She’s very…assertive,” Thorax noted aloud finally.

            “Ember’s not the sort of dragon to take no for an answer,” Spike observed curtly, pulling one of the gems out of the bowl full of granola and biting into it with a gravely crunch.

            A long and awkward silence fell between them as neither of them was eager to be the next to speak. Thorax spent most of it fretting, eyes wandering aimlessly as he fought over what to do or say next, well aware of the delicate position he had been forced into. Ultimately though, he decided he needed to take the opportunity to at least start and let it go where it will from there, and there was no better way to start than with what felt like the most obvious thing to begin with.

            “Forced confrontation it is, then,” he first mumbled to himself before beginning to address Spike directly, louder but still speaking timidly. “Look, Spike…I’m sorry about all of this.”

            Spike snorted and shook his head, looking almost apologetic. “Don’t apologize for anything,” he muttered but not quite managing to make eye contact. “If anything, I should be apologizing for…well…for being a jerk. You’ve just been trying to make the best of things, while I’ve been rebelling and ending up the jerk nobody likes.”

            “That’s not true, Spike,” Thorax said softly. “You’ve just been…justifiably troubled.”

            Spike snorted again. “It’s still no excuse.”

            Thorax hesitated for a second while watching Spike finish off the first crystal from his provided breakfast. “Maybe it is,” he said, more to himself than anything. He sighed. “Look, it’s clear to everybody that I’ve done something that’s bothering you, and I just want to try and make it right again so that doesn’t have to be the case, Spike.”

            Spike made a curt, false, and altogether weak laugh. “Thorax…our friendship’s coming apart.”

            Thorax nodded solemnly. “I know. I want to prevent that.” He tilted his head sadly at Spike. “Don’t you?”

            “Of course I do, Thorax.” Spike paused for a moment, tilting the bowl of granola in his claws idly, watching the contents sift and stir around as he did so. “But… if the past few days have shown anything…it’s maybe that the path you need to be on…just isn’t the same as mine…and we just might have to accept that.”

            Thorax kept shaking his head, denying this and not at all ready to even consider it. “I don’t believe that.”

            “You’re going to have to, I fear,” Spike grumbled, scowling suddenly, angry.

            “You can’t be satisfied with that, though.”

            “I’m not. That friendship is practically the last worthwhile possession I have. I’ve lost everything else, after all. Twice, even. I have nothing else to my name except the clothes on my back, a pile of parchments full of random ramblings I’ve convinced myself might actually be worth something…and you. You are all I have left, my one and only belonging, so to speak, the valuable I want keep close and keep entirely to just me. But I can’t, can I? Because I still want you on your way to a good life independent of things that would otherwise bar your path or hold you back. It’s all I have left to live for, making sure you succeed…that you not just survive but also thrive, and go on to have that good and happy life you deserve so very deeply. If something were to prevent that…something that happens to you…I-I can’t even bear to think it. I…” Spike shook his head, tearing up. “…I think I’d lose it, if that happened, Thorax. And I desperately want to avoid that…even if that means I lose out in the process. That’s why our friendship can’t continue, Thorax. Your paths are going separate from mine, and I won’t stand in the way of that.”

            Thorax gaped at him. “And you’re just going to let it?”

            “I can’t keep being the scorned little dragon who wants to horde you to himself like some kind of foal with a favorite toy, to ensure nothing ever happens to you!” Spike stopped to wipe at his eyes with one arm. “Look, last night, Ember expressed concern that I was being too lenient and always letting you have your way when she knew I didn’t want to or thought it wise, that’s what she was wanting me to tell you earlier…but after you made me realize I was basically dooming all of Equestria just to settle a grudge I really just have against one pony who not only wasn’t there when I needed her but also wants to hurt you, that prized possession of mine…that’s when I realized…realized my greed was being unfair not just to all of them…but especially to you. If I were to keep you protected forever, I’d be happy that you stayed safe, but you’d never find happiness or much freedom…and…I care for you too much to let that happen to you. So even though I hate it to death and as much as I don’t want to do it, I’ve been trying to back off…letting you do what you need to do, Thorax, what you want to do, and trying harder to keep in mind your own desires. You deserve that freedom, I’ve said that since the beginning. And by golly…I’m going to see you get it, even if it’s the last thing I do. No matter the price.”

            “And even if you lose the very thing you want in the process,” Thorax murmured, believing he was starting to understand.

            Spike nodded sadly, hanging his head.

            Thorax shook his head. “But that’s not good enough for me,” he said. “What about your own needs? Your own concerns? Your own fears? You deserve a better life, too.” He kept shaking his head sadly at his dragon friend, tilting it with concern. “Spike…this is not a path I like you being on. I want better for you.”

            “I can’t have better, Thorax. We’ve quite clearly established that now. After everything I’ve been through, everything I’ve had to suffer, and losing out again and again at finding a stable and happy life, continually getting it ripped out from under me repeatedly, I’ve given up on being happy, anyway! So you just go! Have your happy little life, and don’t waste time worrying about me! I lost my chance for such a life, and I’ll just have to live with it but that doesn’t mean you have to too. Either way…clearly we both can’t be happy.”

            Thorax gazed at him stubbornly for a moment. “And if I refuse to accept that?”

            Spike gazed at him with a look that was partly terrified, partly distraught, and partly furious. “Please don’t,” he pleaded.

            But Thorax stood his ground. “No,” he stated resolutely, making his choice. His gaze narrowed determinedly, “I’m not going to stand to one side and neglect your needs like this, Spike, not after everything you’ve done for me. You gave up everything to help me after all, Spike, you can’t get more selfless than that!”

            “You would’ve died if I didn’t, Thorax,” Spike spoke levelly, like it didn’t make a difference.

            But it did to Thorax. “Exactly. I owe my very life to you, Spike, and I’ve long wanted to repay you for that somehow.” Thorax shook his head, ashamed. “But instead, I’ve let my excitement at trying to achieve my desire for better relations with Equestria distract me…and foolishly letting you get left behind as a result, overlooking the damage I am bringing you, even though it’s been staring me in the face, haven’t I?” Thorax blinked back tears quickly before proceeding. “Spike, you’ve sacrificed enough for me already, and through my neglect to you, now you’re on the verge of sacrificing too much, enough that you’re losing yourself…just for my sake…and I canNOT ask you to do that. Its past time I did something to return the favor. It’s time I sacrificed things for you and your own benefit, just like what you have for me.” He shook his head, ashamed, rising to his hooves and staring to pace. “Informis Una auxilio mihi tribuit, I should’ve done so far sooner than now…”

            Spike raised his gaze at Thorax, eyes narrowing into a glare of denial. “I will not let you take the blame for this. You’ve done nothing wrong.”

            “Yes I have, and the more I listen to you berate yourself, the more I am ashamed by what I see. Spike…you’re falling apart, and clearly I’ve not done enough to help resolve it! Clearly I’ve been ignoring your words, your desires, your needs, your decaying spirit, just so I can indulge in a silly little dream! No more of that, Spike! No more! Not when the price is losing you. I am NOT willing to pay that price, not ever!”

            “No, no,” Spike intoned, standing up suddenly, motioning to himself. “Thorax, I’m too far gone…lost too much to be able to ever recover—as much as you want to, you can’t fix that!”

            “Watch me,” Thorax vowed, stamping one hoof down in determination. “I’m not doing a thing more until I’ve seen to it that you are out of this horrible place I’ve stupidly let you fall into. And I’ll do what I need to do to straighten this out, whatever that might be, even if it means I stop chasing that dream, distance myself from ponies that are clearly only distracting me—”

            He was cut short when Spike suddenly hurled the bowl of granola in his claws down hard onto the floor. “Don’t you dare!” he shouted. “Don’t you DARE!” Enraged and distraught simultaneously, he was suddenly upon Thorax, grabbing the changeling by the collar of his jacket, surprising Thorax enough that he stumbled backwards and bumped into the helm behind him, accidentally unlocking the controls. Spike didn’t do it out of malice though, but out of pleading. “I’ve been through Tartarus and BACK getting you this far, Thorax, I am NOT going let you just throw it all away like this, everything I’ve worked so hard to help you earn, I refuse to let you do that, not for my sake!” Spike hollered, tears streaming from his eyes. “You are on the verge of getting EVERYTHING and that’s wonderful, absolutely wonderful—it’s not worth it letting that go trying to futilely fix someone as broken as me that has no hope having any of that himself!”

            “But you do have that hope, Spike, and maybe you can’t see it, but I can! And I will not accept that life at the price of your own, Spike, because this should be a wonder you can share in too, and I don’t ever want to hear you tell yourself otherwise!” Thorax only retorted back, tears beginning to flow from his own eyes as he threw off Spike’s claws and then grabbed the little dragon in a bear hug, almost as if afraid that if he let the dragon go, he’d vanish forever. “Of all the things I’ve gained in the past four moons Spike, you are the one most important to me out of them all…and I’m not about to let that go just because you’ve lost hope in yourself. I’ve been neglecting that as of late in light of recent events and getting all caught up in that, but I swear to you now…I’m going to help you get that hope back. I don’t know how…but I am going to.”

            Spike was shaking his head, buried in Thorax’s jacketed chest, weeping openly. “You…you…” he murmured, sounding like he was trying to shout out some sort of insult but was failing. He eventually trailed off, his words falling into a stream of sobbing.

            They both sat there in silence for several minutes, save for the sound of their respective weeping for each other. Finally, the initial flood of tears out of the way, the emotions of the two started to cool some, enough that the ability to speak coherently returned.

            “What’s happened to us, Spike?” Thorax asked forlornly. “We were the closest of friends for moons, and then in the space of a mere few days, that’s all starting to come apart…and I fear we only have ourselves to blame.”

            “I know,” Spike said, and he met Thorax’s gaze finally, looking despondent. “That’s what I’m afraid of.” He wrapped Thorax tightly in a hug of his own. “You are the greatest friend I’ve ever had, Thorax…and I am terrified of losing that for any reason.”

            “So am I,” Thorax responded, giving Spike an extra squeeze in return. “But what terrifies me more is that despite that unsettling you so much, you’ve just given up trying to fight it anymore.” He shook his head. “Spike, please tell me honestly…how long have you felt like this?”

            Spike rubbed at his wet eyes. “Awhile,” he replied vaguely.

            “How long is ‘awhile?’”

            “I don’t know…I haven’t really been keeping track.”

            “Best guess, then.”

            “Why? Why is it so important when I realized I was past the point of no return?”

            “A couple of reasons, one of which is that I know, less than a moon ago, you were starting to relax and settle in back at Vanhoover, being anything but past the point of no return.”

            “No, I wasn’t…I was still living in fear of being discovered on up until Twilight did precisely that.”

            “Okay, maybe, but there was still a point where that fear was at its all-time lowest.”

            “And that was?”

            “When you started rebuilding your comic collection.”

            Spike glanced up at him in surprise. “Rebuilding my—what does that have to do with anything?”

            “Everything,” Thorax replied. “Because you had been considering doing it well before then, but you still held off, because you knew you couldn’t take it with you if we had to leave Vanhoover.”

            “And I was right, and I didn’t.”

            “No you didn’t…but the fact you started it anyway says you had reached a point where you still saw things as stable…and that you weren’t going to go anywhere anytime soon. In short, Spike…you felt safe enough to do it…you were starting to look after yourself for a change, doing what you wanted or needed.” Thorax gazed at Spike in lament. “At the time, in fact…you had seemed to be in pretty good spirits…the best I had seen you in a long time…it made me think that maybe you were past the danger of falling into states like this…and maybe that’s when I stopped paying attention to it when I should’ve kept doing so still…but regardless, it saddens me that you’ve lost all that progress now, which is the other reason why I want to know how long you’ve felt like this. If I knew when it started…maybe we can figure out why, too.”

            Spike sniffled to himself for a moment. “Well, it was before trying to rebuild the comic collection then, though I suppose the full reality was still sinking in at that time…”

            “Before?” Thorax grew puzzled. “Then…what got you going down the lane of thought that’s led us to…well…here?”

            Spike pressed his head against Thorax’s chest sadly again. “I guess it was when I first started to suspect our friendship was coming to an end.”

            Thorax shook his head to himself, hugging the dragon closer. “And what makes you so sure it was way back then?” he asked determinedly.

            “Because I think we were already drifting away anyway whether we realized it or not, and we’ve only kept on going ever since.”

            “But what made you think that?”

            “…you felt like you were drifting away, Thorax, getting…distant. Caught up in your own things, and…and that didn’t include me.”

            Thorax frowned, wondering if that was possibly true and he had simply failed to notice. If so, it only made him feel all the more guilty about it. “If that’s the case, I wasn’t trying to. I’m still not trying to now, Spike, I swear I’m not. I would have at least worried too much about your well-being and you getting left behind if I was.”

            “But you have, too distracted to pay attention, because it’s not just me you have to worry about anymore, now is it?”

            “Then who—?” Thorax pulled back a little, looking Spike in the eye as he suddenly understood. “Trixie. You’re talking about me and Trixie, aren’t you?”

            Spike averted his gaze as if ashamed, but he nodded his head, starting slowly and reluctantly, but quickly with increasing speed and emphasis. “I can’t lie, Thorax, I’m not a fan of Trixie…but…it was never really her specifically that was the problem. Sure, I may find her ego annoying as all hay…but I’m not an idiot, Thorax. I know she’s trying to turn her life around. How successful she’s being at it is another topic…but it’s not her I ever had the issue with, it was…” he hesitated, burying his face in Thorax’s chest again. “…it was the thought that, with you starting to spend so much time with her…when were you ever going to have any time left for me?”

            Thorax stared at him in shock. “Is that what this has been about? You’re just afraid Trixie is going to take me away from you?” When Spike sheepishly nodded, Thorax pulled him close for another hug. “Oh, Spike.” He took a deep breath. “All of this, you losing hope in yourself and overlooking your needs like this…that’s all been because I met Trixie, wasn’t it?” Spike nodded again. Thorax shuddered to himself, his heart feeling weighed down with guilt. “And that was because I’ve lied to you about how close we’ve gotten ever since we first met…isn’t it?” Another nod. Thorax sighed, realizing the depth of his error. “Look…there’s no point in denying it because this much is certainly true: you are no longer the only friend I have anymore, and Trixie…Trixie certainly is special to me, I won’t deny that either, and there’s a lot about that I’ve been…been really caught up trying to figure out. But none of that should matter…because you are a whole other type of special to me, different from Trixie. You’re not just my best friend…you’re my first friend. And you needn’t fear, Spike, because nothing is ever going to change that. Not anything. Not even Trixie, even if I do choose to…become closer still with her…and I’m sorry I never made that clear to you sooner, because I should’ve, I really, really, should’ve.” He paused, debating to himself for a moment. “You know, you say you’ve been doing these sort of things wanting to keep in consideration my own desires and attempts at happiness, even if it meant pushing me away…but did it ever occur to you, that I’ve been trying to do the same thing for you?”

            Spike was quiet for a moment, but he didn’t remove his face from Thorax’s chest. “You have?” he asked softly, sounding like he had been caught off guard by this.

            Thorax nodded slowly. “For starters, why do you think I didn’t confront you sooner about your…your unresolved emotions? I was trying to respect your wants and desires and above all, your privacy, by staying out of a matter you clearly never wanted to delve too deeply into. I knew addressing it was going to cause you pain…and I certainly didn’t want that.”

            Spike didn’t seem very swayed by this though. “That hardly compares, Thorax.”

            “But it’s not the only example.” Thorax averted his gaze for a second, fearing the reaction admitting this might cause, but he knew he had to say it. “The night I was at Trixie’s show in Vanhoover, while we were talking afterwards…she offered me the chance to leave Vanhoover with her and join her show.” He felt Spike stiffen at this, but Thorax pressed on before he could say anything. “I turned her down at that time, of course, for a number of reasons…but one big one was because…doing that would likely mean parting ways with you, leaving you behind…and I couldn’t do that, not then. You still needed my support…and I think I still needed yours, too. We both probably still do now.”

            Spike was again quiet for a moment before responding. “Things have since changed, though, Thorax,” he pointed out sadly.

            “Indeed,” Thorax admitted, and took a deep breath as he went on to admit another reveal. “Which is why when Trixie made the offer again this past evening…I was more willing to consider it.” He again felt Spike stiffen, but Thorax wrapped his hooves tighter around the little dragon before Spike could do or say anything. “She’s ready to let you come with this time though, if you’re willing, which certainly helps…but the real reason I’m more willing to consider it this time though is…more because I was thinking that, if we pull this rescue off and smooth things out with the princesses like I hope we’ll be able to…you were going to want to try and return to live in Ponyville, try and rebuild something akin to what you had lost…where you weren’t going to need me playing such a constant role in your life, and thus…leaving me off to the side and in need of some place to go. Of course, I’d still visit as often as I could in such an instance…but I was thinking that…that would be the time where I would need to respect your own wants in life…and part ways and go my own way in life…” he heaved a sad sigh, shuddering with repressed sadness, “…even if I didn’t really want to.”

            He felt Spike tighten his grip around his barrel, the dragon pressing his face harder into the changeling’s chitinous chest as if fearing Thorax would depart now and wanted to keep him close. “You…you were really willing to do that…just because you thought I’d…I’d be happier that way?”

            Thorax nodded. “Yeah. Because…because your happiness matters to me too, Spike.”

            “But Thorax…I don’t want you to go anywhere.”

            At this, Thorax had to smile a little, realizing that they were more on the same page than they thought. “Good, because I don’t want you to go anywhere either if I can help it,” he said. “And if you want me to stay, I certainly will.” He swallowed heavily, feeling a swell of emotions rising in his chest. “Look, I’ll admit, there might still be times when others need my support for one reason or another that require my focus on them, or times when I’m slow on the uptake on your own troubles like I’ve clearly been these past few days…but I’m still not about to let any of that take away my friendship with you, not for a moment. I will always and forever be there for you in the end and for as long as you need me, Spike…no matter what. On the name of the Informis Una herself, I swear it. That friendship of ours will not end. I will not allow it…and I’d like to think you won’t either.”

            With Spike’s face still buried in his chest, Thorax couldn’t clearly see the dragon’s face, but he didn’t need to, as the despairing sadness in his emotions were suddenly replaced with a bright and vibrant flare of hope, one Thorax realized he hadn’t sensed in Spike in quite a long time. He found it was a very welcome change. “You really mean that?” the dragon asked in a hopeful squeak.

            Thorax didn’t even hesitate in his response. “Of course, Spike, you shouldn’t even have to ask that. After all, you are my greatest friend, too.” He patted the little dragon on the back for a second, before reaching in and lifting his chin so he was looking up at Thorax’s face. “You know,” he assured softly, “I think you have a lot more than you give yourself credit for. You act like you’ve hit bottom, and that you have nothing at all…but I disagree. You’ve had it rough these past few moons certainly, we both have, but you still have potential, Spike, just as much as I do, to go and do good things. You’ve already demonstrated that in loyally supporting me for all these moons, an act I can’t begin to thank you enough for… there’s no reason not to believe that you can’t do that again, or to go further still.” He poked Spike in the belly. “Especially with that big heart of yours. You also have talent, of all sorts…and you have an amazing and analyzing head on your shoulders.” Thorax’s gaze turned distant, remembering. “I…was told once, not so long ago, that anyone can do as they’re told, but only a few think for themselves, keeping in mind the bigger picture. And you do that, you think beyond what you’re told, Spike, and consider if there could be a better way to do something than what you’re told.”

            Spike snorted. “Don’t you do that, though? Isn’t that how you got to this point in the first place?”

            “Sort of. But with me…I’m more reckless.”

            “You? Reckless?”

            Thorax shrugged. “Maybe not in the traditional sense…but yeah, I think I’d have to be. Looking back…I’ve kind of always tended to pick the first plan that feels right to me, and then I just go and try to act upon it, regardless of the consequences or the risks. I sort of always felt the risks would be worth it if the end results still paid off…and in so doing, I took risks that could’ve backfired and threatened our well-being well before now. Interacting with the likes of Ragg and Trixie, going about and exploring Vanhoover without regard…all of those instances could’ve ended badly for us…if I hadn’t gotten lucky and it went our way anyway. And when it did, I patted myself on the back and decided that made it okay to take such a risk again…as such I kept pursuing my ideals without ever really acknowledging the damage that could come with it.” He then gave Spike a nudge. “But you did, you always knew better and always tried to tell me as such, even though I regret that I don’t think I always listened as much as I should’ve…and I certainly haven’t been doing that enough lately either, for which I truly do deeply apologize for Spike…regardless, my point is that, unlike me, you were never so ready to take such a risk, at least not without plenty of just cause to support it. You thought about it and considered all the options first, then picked the one that seemed the best available. I think that’s what you’re trying to do now…only now you’ve convinced yourself you don’t have as many options as you really do.”

            Thorax paused to take a breath, averting his gaze as he did so, collecting his thoughts but then just as quickly returning his gaze onto Spike. “But most important of all…you are far from alone, Spike. It’s not just me—you have plenty of other friends: Miss Fly, various patrons to her shop, Dragon Lord Ember, Fluttershy…and there are plenty more who still want to be your friend. Starlight, Trixie, Princess Luna…all of them have expressed at some point that they want to reconnect with you, to make reparations for what happened and become a friend to you again…and from what we’ve been told, they are far from alone. By the sounds of it, most of Twilight’s friends wish to reconnect with you. I think you have far more friends and allies both in and out of Equestria than you’ve been telling yourself.”

            Spike turned his head, gaze turning vacant and thoughtful, but also puzzled as he considered all of this.

            Thorax pressed on though, turning firm. “But friendship is two-way, Spike,” he continued. “It isn’t all take all the time…you have to also give back, too. And I worry what your problem, your real problem, is that you’ve been refusing these attempts to be friends with others even now, because you’ve convinced yourself you can’t have them…and you’re only pushing them away, isolating yourself needlessly from those you need to help support you…even me. You don’t have to do that, though. And in the case of me, you’re trying to give all, but take nothing back in return…and while your intentions are beyond well-meaning in that…that’s not really how it works, Spike. Friends work best when you let the other give back a little too.”

            Thorax gazed wandered off a bit, Spike watching the changeling as he did this, thoughts thinking of other things. “Actually…it’s sort of like the situation with the other changelings, but in reverse. They’re trying to take all and give nothing in return, and are left feeling they’re the ones getting demonized as a result. Worst, when you take all and give nothing back…then ultimately, there’s only going to be so much to take and still not enough to go around.”

            “So you’re saying they should try giving more,” Spike reasoned, the first time he had spoken in a little bit, but demonstrating he was very much listening to Thorax.

            Thorax nodded. “Exactly,” he said. “I’m positive I’m not the first to ever try it, of course, but…I think why I succeeded where others haven’t is that…others probably tried by giving all but refusing to take back what they needed to survive, thinking that was the wrong thing to do.”

            “So they just kept giving and giving…” Spike began summing up.

            “…until they could give up no more,” Thorax finished with a solemn nod. “And, being a changeling, either starved…or gave up and went back to the old way of just taking it all out of desperation, deciding anything else couldn’t be done after all.”

            “But then that’s the secret,” Spike realized, and again he perked up with a sudden flare of hope. He looked to Thorax with a bit of eagerness bleeding onto his face. “You succeeded in being the good changeling and befriending those who would normally be mere enemies or prey not by giving all your love, but rather by giving just what you needed, and taking only what you needed and was given to you back in return, that way all get the love and none go without.”

            Thorax chuckled a little. “When you say it like that, you make it sound easy,” he noted.

            “It’s because it is, it has to be,” Spike reasoned, and he stood. “If you could just convince the other changelings of that…”

            “And I hope to, one day,” Thorax agreed, standing as well. “But it’s not that easy. You have to keep in mind just how engrained the idea that a changeling must take everything just to survive is. To them, to give up anything would be almost suicidal. It’s going to take more than just a few well-placed words to get them to see there’s a better way, I’ve always known that.”

            “Show them, then,” Spike reasoned, motioning to Thorax. “Show them that if you can live doing it, so can they.”

            “And I will,” Thorax assured, ruffling Spike’s spines and pleased to see Spike suddenly so eager. “But not today. Right now, we’ve got bigger problems to face in that we need to stop their plans to conquer Equestria and free the princesses they have captured. And that’ll be a big enough bite to chew as it is…I don’t think we need to add to it.” He shrugged. “Besides, even if we succeed perfectly at this plan, I doubt the hive’s going to be going anywhere afterwards. There will still be the chance to come back and make my case properly, when the time’s better for it.” He sighed then looked Spike in the eye. “But we’re getting off topic. What we’re talking about right now isn’t about them…this is about you and me.”

            Spike sighed and averted his gaze. “Yeah,” he admitted dejectedly. He shook his head sadly. “Look, Thorax…I…I just…”

            “Spike,” Thorax interrupted, placing a hoof on the dragon’s shoulder. “I know, like my changeling brethren, you have things engrained now that seem too hard to change or that you may not want to change right now. And…I don’t want to be the one to tell you what to do. I’ve tried that already…and I worry it’s only been making things worse by giving you the feeling you’ve lost control of your own life. Maybe there are some of those things we’re both going to just have to live with for now, work at gradually changing over time. But…trust me…change can still be good. You needn’t always fear it. And…just like what you believe for me…you deserve better too. You’ve been trying so hard to ensure I get that better life for myself…can’t I still try to do the same for you?”

            Tears formed in Spike’s eyes again, but the mood behind them felt different this time. “Of course you can, Thorax,” he said. “I…I never meant to act like you couldn’t, it’s just…it’s hard to believe things could ever be…as good as they once were…it feels like I’ve fallen so much that I can never get it all back…not entirely.”

            Thorax licked his lips thoughtfully, bowing his head as he knew what he was about to say would be upsetting. “Spike…even I know that the life you had once before, living happily and peacefully with Twilight and her friends in Ponyville without care or worry…that’s gone forever now. And no matter how much both of us wish it wasn’t so…we shouldn’t pretend that it’s ever going to come back, because it isn’t. Too much has happened, and too much has changed. We might be able to get select parts of it back again, and I hope for your sake we do, but it can’t be put back to the same way it was in full, not ever.” He watched Spike for a second, studying the dragon’s expression and noting his emotions, trying to gauge his reaction to this. When the reaction didn’t prove to be immediately negative, he pressed on with what he hoped would be a slightly cheerier note. “But…maybe we shouldn’t try. In this misery we’ve brought upon both of ourselves in various ways…I’d like to think there’re still new rays of light and hope we’ve opened up too that we can pursue instead. Either way, the old is gone, so now it’s time to start anew. Go in new directions in life, see what happiness those can bring, what new things we can achieve through them, and…” he paused, knowing this was a subject they had both touched upon before. But he knew it still needed to be said. “…move on.”

            Spike mulled upon Thorax’s words for a second. “You think letting go of the past and…just starting from scratch, really is the best option available to me, then?” he asked.

            Thorax chose his words carefully in replying, careful to not let Spike allow him to tell him what to do. “It’s an option available to you,” he corrected. “You…you do whatever you think is best, Spike, and whatever it is…I’ll try to do my best to support you in this, within reason.” He shook his head. “Whatever you do, know that I don’t want things to be just about me, but rather both of us, together. I have my own needs, true, but let me see to them for now. In the meantime, you have your own needs, right? What do you need to do to see to them?”

            Spike thought about it for a second. “I honestly don’t know,” he admitted. He seemed troubled, and his emotions suggested he was frustrated in himself. “It’s…been so long since I’ve even really thought about it…”

            “Tell me what you’d like then. It doesn’t matter how impossible it might seem right now. We’ve already talked at length about my dreams…what are some of yours, Spike?”

            Spike fidgeted with his claws awkwardly. “…I’d like a home again,” he admitted, though with some uncertainty. “You know…someplace I know I can be safe at…someplace I wouldn’t have to just up and leave again anytime soon. Someplace I can live an ordinary life, where I don’t have to lie to those I care about in order to survive, like what we did in Vanhoover. Someplace…peaceful.”

            “What else?” Thorax prompted, urging Spike on. When Spike didn’t immediately continue, he sought to make a suggestion. “Maybe someplace with friends?” When Spike averted his gaze again, he frowned, tilting his head sadly. “Or…do you prefer to stay in seclusion? Push those you could meet away?”

            Spike frowned and hung his head, catching onto what Thorax was trying not to imply but was clearly thinking. “Thorax, I’m not deliberately trying to push anyone away,” he said. “Not really…I…never wanted to admit it, but…deep down…I don’t like the idea of…of being alone and on my own. It’s just…after all of this…my trust has been shattered so badly…it’s hard to want to trust anyone but me now…and you, of course.”

            “I know,” Thorax said with a nod. “I can understand that and relate to a certain degree. After all the scorn we’ve faced, it’s safe to say that opening ourselves up to others only to have them turn against us in the end is a very real fear, and not an unjustified one.”

            “Right,” Spike agreed. “But…at the same time…I don’t like that I do have that fear…in fact it makes me…angry…angry at myself. I want to open up and make friends again, but…” he shook his head again. “Honestly, Thorax? I’m too scared to.”

            “So start small,” Thorax reasoned. He grinned encouragingly. “Besides…you aren’t alone. You have me and others who want to help that you can call friends already.”

            Spike grinned a little. “I guess maybe I do,” he said. “It’s…it’s just easy to forget that, sometimes.” He looked at Thorax a bit more optimistically. “Maybe you have a point, then. Maybe what I need to do is not so much make new friends…but let the ones I already have back in.”

            Thorax grinned a little himself, but he chose not to comment, wanting to leave the choice to do that or not to Spike. “So what can I do to help you obtain those things?”

            Spike grinned a little, heartened by this show of support his changeling friend was giving in such earnest. “You know, I honesty haven’t the foggiest,” he admitted truthfully. He turned his head to look Thorax in the eye. “But you know what? Just…talking about it is making life…feel a bit more bearable right now.”

            Thorax grinned. “Good.”

            The two friends pulled each other close in a one-armed hug and gazed ahead of them and out the forward viewport they now both faced.

            Spike eventually took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Thorax,” he said finally, “For everything…everything bad that has ever happened to both me and you since we met, regardless of who might be responsible for it. I wish it didn’t have to be that way.”

            “Likewise,” Thorax said softly. He sighed. “I’m sorry too, and sorry I left you feeling neglected. You’re my greatest friend, Spike…that’s the very last thing I want to be doing.”

            Spike was quiet for a second. “I’m guessing the way ahead of us is going to be one hay of a treacherous climb,” he admitted aloud. “But…oddly, for once…I don’t feel too bothered by that now. I can’t help but feel that…” he grinned again. “…that maybe things are going our way again, after all. And if so, then I embrace that.” He looked up at Thorax. “And if that also means we have to go storm the changeling hive to keep that feeling going, that sense that there is light at the end of the tunnel that we can actually get at?” His expression turned determined. “Then I say…bring it on.”

            Thorax smirked and made a mock salute. “Aye-aye, captain.”

            They snickered to themselves for a moment. Thorax used his magic to scoop up the bowl of granola and gems Spike had thrown onto the floor earlier, ensured the contents were clean, then levitated it over to his dragon friend, who accepted the bowl and thoughtfully resumed eating them.

            “Well…” Spike continued after a second, having reflected back upon their conversation,

“Wherever we’re at now…” he set down his bowl for a second and grabbed Thorax around the middle in a hug. “…don’t you go anywhere.”

            Thorax gladly returned the hug. “I certainly don’t intend to, Spike,” he said. “Honestly…I don’t think I want to be anywhere else, anyway.”

            They lingered in the hug for another moment longer, but then Thorax reluctantly had to break away when he remembered he had bumped the Vergilius’s steering controls unlocked and left the ship’s wheel idly moving freely ever since. “Hold on, we’re veering off course,” he mumbled aloud as he quickly rose to take the wheel, turning the craft back onto the proper course again.

            Spike picked up his breakfast once more and held it in his claws as he idly followed Thorax to the helm, watching while the changeling did this. He gazed out the forward viewport and out at the terrain they were flying over on this actually very pretty morning. “You know, the terrain is looking lusher out there than I was expecting, given how far south we are now,” he admitted aloud.

            “The south isn’t all dry and mostly barren terrain, you know,” Thorax said. Having put them back on course—they thankfully hadn’t strayed too far—he studied the land for a moment too. “Though along this way, the greenery is going to be patchy until we start drawing near to the acorn grove that surrounds the changeling hive.”

            Spike quietly munched his breakfast to himself for a moment. “How much longer until we arrive there, anyway?”

            “Probably not for another hour or more, at the soonest,” Thorax admitted.

            “Hmm,” Spike hummed again as he chewed. He swallowed before continuing. “Sounds like we still have some time to kill, then.” He gazed at the terrain for a second then glanced at Thorax. “Have you ever played I spy?”

            Thorax glanced at him, raising one chitinous brow curiously. “I spy?”

            “Yeah, like, I spy with my little eye….something…big,” Spike offered. He motioned at the wilderness outside to silently prompt Thorax into guessing what it was.

            Thorax, catching on, gazed out the viewport for a moment for anything that could match that vague description. “…the sky?”

            Spike gave him a slightly incredulous look. “That’s the first thing you thought of?”

            Thorax shrugged. “Well, it is big, isn’t it?”

            They chuckled for a moment, and as they continued with the travel game, for the first time in the past couple of days they felt like ordinary friends again, just hanging out and not a care in the world. And for the moment, that was that mattered, and they simply wanted to cherish that for a bit. Their fears and personal troubles certainly weren’t gone, and they were still perfectly aware that they were flying into a dangerous situation still. But now, both of them had accepted that and for now, the two friends weren’t going to let that bother them.

            And whatever the future brought them, good or bad…both of them finally felt ready for it.  





            Meanwhile, Ember peeked over the top of the steps leading up from the below deck, watching the pair and gauging their progress. Standing behind the dragoness was a nervous Starlight and standing beside her was Trixie, holding her own bowl of granola aloft in her magic and munching away on the contents as they awaited Ember’s report.

            “So?” Starlight prompted in a quiet whisper after a moment. “How’s it going up there? They’re not going at each other’s throats, are they? Have they actually settled down a little?”

            “Better than that,” Ember remarked back with an approving smirk at the sight of Spike and Thorax chatting at the helm like the old friends they were. “They look like they’re getting along like a lazy dragon would with a sun-warmed rock.”

            Trixie raised a confused eyebrow as she chewed on her granola for a second. “I assume that means they’re getting along good, then,” she surmised.

            Ember rolled her eyes, annoyed at the two ponies’ lack of understanding of her dragon simile. “What else would it mean?” she asked, then nodded her head. “But yes. I think it worked, they’ve talked it out, and they’re getting along great now.” She shot a victorious glance at Starlight. “And you thought my idea to force them together was only going to end in disaster.”

            “To be fair, I was right to be concerned,” Starlight argued back, folding her hooves while Trixie beside her leaned her head back so to pour the remainder of her bowl of granola into her mouth. “Judging from their shouting eariler, it all very nearly ended in disaster and them on even worse terms than they were before. You can’t just force a resolution for every situation, Ember, sometimes it takes a bit more finesse than that. You took a huge risk just acting like that, and not even letting anypony else know what you planned until after you had already carried it out…and only when we asked, no less.” But then she sighed and looked otherwise relieved. “But that all said…I’m still glad to hear they’re getting along better now. I could tell Thorax was especially troubled by it…their friendship means a lot to them.”

            “It means a lot to them both, Spike was starting to fly apart at the seams over the matter,” Ember remarked as she stepped down from the steps and joined the other two mares. “He’s relied quite heavily on that friendship with Thorax, and I think Thorax has too. And can you blame them? For ages, all they really ever had was each other. I don’t think they would’ve lasted this long if they didn’t have that support.” Her gaze turned a little forlorn as she glanced back in the direction of the two sitting above deck, unaware the others were talking about them. “They need each other too much…to lose that friendship now, over a misunderstanding of what the other wants or intended…that would’ve been the real disaster.”

            “You know, she has a point,” Trixie agreed through a mouthful of granola. “It doesn’t take a genius to see that those two work best as a team.”

            “Don’t talk with your mouth full, Trixie,” Starlight groused as the three wandered back into the ship’s saloon.

            Trixie swallowed before continuing. “All I’m saying is that if we really plan to follow those two into the depths of the changeling hive, it’d probably be best to have them on good terms with each other rather than not talking to each other.”

            “Which is why I did what I did,” Ember concluded as she took a seat at the table again, lounging her almost serpentine body in the bench seat. “This little feud of theirs couldn’t keep going. Besides, they’ve been through too much already to let it come apart now.”

            “True, they have been through more than anyone should ever have to,” Starlight agreed as she took a seat across the table from Ember. “Becoming outcasts, venturing treacherous terrain alone, struggling for supplies and a way of life, living in fear and as criminals, always trying to outrun their pursuers…” she plunked her head onto the table with a heavy sigh. “…and I’m one of the ponies that helped bring that all down on them. I’m such an idiot…it should’ve been obvious to me what was really going on ages ago…but I completely missed it and put my trust in Twilight, never stopping to think that she might have…misjudged.”

            “She did far more than that,” Trixie grumbled as she sat herself beside Ember. “Personally, Spike’s kind of right in thinking there’s a bit of vindication to be had in Twilight getting caught by a changeling invasion like this.”

            “From what he says about her, he’s still furious with her,” Ember agreed.

            “I know, which makes this little victory they achieved this morning feel like a mere molehill in comparison to the towering mountain that will be the inevitable confrontation with Twilight awaiting them if we pull off this rescue,” Starlight remarked with clear dread. She shook her head. “No matter what happens…that’s only going to end with a lot of pain on all sides, I fear.”

            Trixie toyed with one end of her mane. “You think Twilight’s even going to listen to them this time?” she asked Starlight slowly.

            Starlight didn’t reply right away. “I hope for her sake she does, or…” she trailed off, afraid to even speak of the worst-case scenario.

            “I’m guessing it’ll end very badly for her if she doesn’t,” Trixie concluded.

            “An understatement at best,” Starlight agreed.

            “Personally, I have a few choice words of my own for that mare,” Ember grumbled, who still wasn’t too pleased with Twilight’s actions in all of this herself. “But time for that later.” She grinned. “Right now, I’m just going to savor the fact that I was right and made the right call in getting those two talking like I did, because it totally worked when you two thought it wouldn’t. Which reminds me…”

            She turned to Trixie, nudged her with her scaly elbow, and then held out an open palm to the stage magician, beckoning to the mare. Trixie scowled, but as agreed, she begrudgingly hoofed over five golden bits into the dragoness’s waiting claws. With a victorious cackle, Ember clutched the bits she had won with savor. Starlight, however, just rolled her eyes, having not approved of the bet from the start.

            “So what should we do now?” Starlight asked instead, changing the subject.

            “Yeah, can we go up above deck now, or are you going to keep us detained down here a bit longer?” Trixie grumbled to Ember.

            “I think we’d best give those two a bit more time to themselves,” Ember concluded, with a nod of her head in the direction of Spike and Thorax. “You know…so they can catch up.”

            Starlight shrugged, thinking that reasonable. “Fair enough,” she said. “But what do we do in the meantime?”

            Trixie glanced around the cabin. “I don’t suppose Spike and Thorax have any board games lying around this airship, do they?”

            Ember twisted around to where Spike had left a board game of sorts since the last time it got played. “Well, I don’t know about board game, but Spike does have a set of Ogres & Oubliettes here…”







            “I spy…something…green.”

            “…tree?”

            “Hmpf.”

            “My turn?”

            “Yeah.”

            “Okay, I spy something…tall.”

            “Uh…tree.”

            “Right.”

            “Uh, I spy something…with bark.”

            “Tree.”

            “Hmpf.”

            “Okay, I spy something…uh…a vertical log?”

            “Tree!”

            “Yeah.”

            “Okay, I spy something—”
            “Tree.”

            “Hmpf!”

            “Okay, my turn—”

            “Tree!”
            “No, no, I gotta—”

            “It counts.”

            “I didn’t even spy anything!”

            “It counts.”

            “Okay, fine,” Spike folded his arms and gave Thorax a rebellious look. “…tree.”

            Thorax groaned, planting his head into the ship’s wheel then chuckled a little. “I think we’ve run out of things to spy,” he observed aloud.

            Spike sniggered a little too. “Yeah, I think you’re right.” He shook his head and sighed. “I missed this though…just the two of us, hanging out, being friends…it seems like it’s been so long since we really have done this last.”

            “Odd to think, then, that it’s really not even been a full week since we left Vanhoover,” Thorax observed.

            “Yeah, but it still feels like it’s been whole moons since then,” Spike mumbled. He sighed again. “Look…I’m sorry, Thorax…I didn’t mean to put either of us in this sort of situation, laying our friendship on the line.”

            “Nor did I,” Thorax said with a sigh of his own. He shook his head, grinning a bit optimistically. “But…despite that…I think it’ll survive…don’t you?”

            Spike shared that grin. “I sure as hay want it to,” he admitted. The grin faded a little. “It’s just…while this whole talk’s helped in spades…it hasn’t changed the fact that…I worry I’m not doing enough to let you go on and get yourself your own life…that you’re holding yourself back for my sake.”

            “Perhaps I am, a little, and I think the same can be safely said for you as well, Spike,” Thorax said. Then he shrugged. “But, you know what? Maybe that doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Clearly, there’s a balance we need to find to our friendship, and we’ve lost sight of that balance, something we’ll need to try and find a way to get back in the days and hopefully weeks to come, but for now…whatever we both choose to do for ourselves in the future…I don’t think our friendship needs to stand in the way of that. We can both build up lives of our own, see to our own needs, but at the same time still maintain that healthy friendship that was what brought us together in the first place. As I said before…friendship is both a give and take affair. Both friends have to give back as much as they take from the relationship…I think we’re just learning what that actually means now, though.” He looked at Spike, placing a holed hoof on his shoulder. “Whatever the case…I certainly don’t want to do anything to damage, much less loose, that friendship. It means far too much to me.”

            Spike grinned and placed his claws on Thorax’s hoof, pleased to hear this. “Me too,” he said. “You have no idea how good it is for me to hear you say that, too. I…I honestly don’t know what I’d do with myself without you, Thorax.”

            Thorax gave the little dragon a pat before removing his hoof. “I know what you mean,” he admitted. “The idea of a life without you beside me as my cherished friend, Spike…it’s a hard idea to swallow, indeed.” He looked out the forward viewport again, gaze turning wistful. “But you know…at the same time…I’d like to think that we both have other friends now that we can count on, just as much as we count on each other, to support us too.”

            Spike’s grin grew a little. “I’d very much like to think that too, honestly,” he said. He, too, turned wistful for a moment. “I do sort of miss the old days…when I had plenty of friends that I could count on…it just seems like I’ve been alienated by many of them after what happened in the Crystal Empire…so it’s easy to think they’re gone forever and never coming back.”

            “And, to be perfectly realistic, it’s quite possible that there are some that are precisely that, estranged friends that won’t be coming back, and for that I apologize for your sake, Spike. It can’t be easy losing friends like that.” But Thorax’s attitude remained positive. “But, if Starlight coming here and trying to make amends for her past actions have proven anything…it’s that at least some of those friends don’t have to remain lost. I hope, for your sake, once this is all over, you and them can work to restore at least some of that lost friendship again, in time.”

            Spike found himself nodding in agreement, actual hopeful for once that Thorax’s words would prove true. “That would be wonderful.” He took a deep breath. “But…we have bigger things to deal with first, things closer to the here and now, right aboard this airship, even.”

            “Right, our plans to rescue the ponies held captive at the hive,” Thorax agreed with a nod. He glanced at Spike, curious. “What are your thoughts on that plan?”

            Spike thought carefully about it before he tried to answer. “Mixed still, honestly,” he admitted. “There’s a part of me that wants the plan to succeed completely as we planned and without problem…part of me that still has high doubts about it actually working and that we won’t just doom ourselves trying…and then there’s still a part of me that doesn’t even want to try at all…for reasons I think you already know well.”

            “I do,” Thorax said with a solemn nod. He studied Spike for a second, sensing his emotions. “But…correct me if I’m wrong, I think you’re starting to push past some of those doubts, at least enough to be willing to at least try the plan along with the rest of us.”

            “I guess so,” Spike agreed. “Though it helps I don’t have a better plan to suggest. And…I don’t really want Chrysalis to win and succeed in conquering Equestria, of course. Still…I’m scared of the possibility that…we might fail.”

            Thorax nodded, understanding. “I wish I could promise it won’t come to that Spike…but realistically speaking…I think we both know I’d be lying if I even tried, because that’s not a promise I can guarantee in any way.”

            Spike nodded too. “I understand,” he said softly. He then glanced at Thorax optimistically, remembering something Ember had told him the previous evening. “But…whatever troubles await us at that hive…at least know that we’ll be facing them together.”

            Thorax grinned and wrapped a hoof around Spike, pulling his friend close. “Together, then,” he agreed.

            They went quiet for a long moment, silently mulling upon things. Then, as Spike’s mind started to wander to other subjects, a sly smirk started to appear on his face.

            “So,” he began slowly, glancing up at Thorax who had turned his attention back to piloting the airship. “If you and Trixie actually get it together…”

            Thorax groaned and let his head thump against the ship’s wheel again, but a slight grin played at his lips as he caught on to Spike’s intentions.

            Spike, however, grinned shamelessly and nudged his friend in the belly with his elbow. “C’mon, you should’ve known the subject was going to come up eventually after everything that’s happened,” he teased.

            Thorax grunted noncommittedly, shooting Spike a look. “I thought you didn’t even like Trixie,” he noted.

            “I really don’t, at least not a great deal,” Spike agreed. “But now I’m confident you’re not going to let her stand in the way of our friendship no matter what happens between you two, so if you really must go through with it, the least I can do is make sure you do it right.”

            “Mm,” Thorax grunted again and straightened, frowning. “Honestly, Spike, I don’t even know where me and Trixie are going anymore,” he confessed. “One moment it seems like we’re both all for it, and then the next we’re both trying to distance ourselves from it as much as possible.”

            “I assume that has to do with the fact that one of you is a changeling and the other isn’t.”

            “I would think that would be the case, yes.” Thorax’s tone was a little sarcastic, saying this.

            Spike was undeterred, though. “Well, that didn’t seem to stop either of you from…having fun…this past night,” he pointed out with a smirk.

            Thorax let out a small, frustrated, wail. “How many times do I have keep telling everybody?” he asked aloud. “Nothing happened between us last night! We just sat down and…and…”

            “…cuddled?” Spike offered idly, his smirk growing.

            “…Talked,” Thorax corrected sternly. “We didn’t do anything more than that.”

            “…except practically fall asleep in each other’s hooves,” Spike reminded.

            Thorax mumbled something incoherently in reluctant confirmation.

            “So…you cuddled,” Spike concluded, smug.

            Thorax made another uncomfortable moan softly through his closed mouth, but he blushed profusely. “Look, nothing happened, no matter how you look at it,” he repeated, rising into a standing position. He glanced down at Spike, then back up at the forward viewport. “I don’t think I should be discussing this with you anyway. No offense, but…isn’t this sort of talk rather…mature…for you?”

            “Nah, it’s okay, I’m all in the know,” Spike assured casually.

            A little too casually for Thorax’s tastes. “Oh really?” he asked skeptically, raising an eyebrow at the dragon.

            “Yeah,” Spike confirmed, then seeing Thorax was doubting, he moved to stand closer beside the changeling. “Here, Thorax, about where would you say I come up to on your body, in terms of height?”

            Thorax turned his head to give Spike a confused look. “What?”

            “Just humor me and answer the question, Thorax.”

            Thorax raised an eyebrow again for a moment, but he relented and after eyeballing Spike’s height against his own for a second, he reached out with one hoof, tapping the spot on his body he thought was about level with Spike’s height, discounting his spines. “About…here,” he said, tapping the top of his flank as he motioned this out. “Why?”

            Spike didn’t reply. He just glanced at the spot Thorax’s hoof was touching then back at Thorax, waiting for him to make the connection himself. Thorax glanced between Spike and his hoof for a second, then abruptly realized that it wasn’t an accident Spike happened to choose to stand right beside the changeling’s flank.

            “Oh,” he mumbled, catching on as his blush returned.

            “Yeah,” Spike said with a nod, and poked Thorax’s flank with his elbow, which the dragon’s head happened to be impeccably level with. “The perfect line of sight to see everything, enough that it’s hard for me to not miss certain details about those around me, so much so that it wasn’t long before I started having certain questions that I wanted answers to. And Twilight, in her infinite wisdom, decided it was more efficient to just go ahead and explain it and get it over with, thus she sat me down then and there and told me about the birds and the bees.”

            Thorax frowned, his brow furrowing as he failed to understand the meaning of the term. “The…birds and the bees?”

            Spike smirked and folded his arms as he gave the changeling a knowing look. “Sex, Thorax.”

            “Oh.” Thorax blushed again and quickly averted his gaze.

            “At any rate, this is a subject I at least know something about,” Spike concluded. “Maybe not as much as those that would, obviously, have more experience than me, but I can totally still follow along for most of it.”

            Thorax frowned, mulling upon all of this. “I don’t know if that’s enough to justify trying to help me though,” he pointed out. He looked over at Spike once more. “Weren’t you the one who said you probably weren’t the best to ask about the subject of love the last time we discussed this matter?”

            “True,” Spike granted with a nod. “And I do gotta admit that you’ve…basically…already gotten further on that subject than I ever have.” He rolled his eyes in mild frustration at this fact, but he chose not to dwell on it. “But you still have clear misgivings about the whole Trixie thing, and I can still at least try to help, can’t I?”

            “Depends on whether or not your advice is actually helpful at all,” Thorax mumbled to himself. His gaze turned distant for second though as he thought about it. He shook his head. “Look, the thing holding me back the most is that I’m just not sure I’m…ready to pursue something like that with someone else, Trixie or not.” He frowned, and suddenly he looked even a bit frightened. “The very idea of it…intimidates me greatly, to be quite honest. What if I mess it up and make a fool of myself?”

            “Ah, you’ve basically got cold hooves, then,” Spike noted, nodding in thoughtful understanding. Thorax appreciated he was at least taking it seriously. “I can understand that, at least. It is a pretty big step…and what with this being the first time you’ve ever gone down this route…”

            “Exactly!” Thorax cried, relieved that Spike understood. “Not only that, but it’s all been going so fast, outside my control…and it feels like I’m doing everything so…out of order. Everyone expects Trixie and I to be leaps and bounds further than we are in this, but in reality I haven’t even properly courted Trixie yet when that should’ve been the very first thing I did…but I didn’t even realize where this was going until much too late, so…”

            “Courting?” Spike repeated with a smirk. “I’m guessing by that you mean changelings have a set and customary way of formally beginning relationships then, or at least the closest you ever come to such a thing, seeing that the customary view for you changelings is it’s more a task to fulfill rather than actual pleasure or enjoyment.”

            “Yes,” Thorax assured with a nod, “a proper way of doing things, to clearly convey intent and that there are no ill-feelings that could complicate things between the pair, show that I consider myself hers, give her the chance to do the same, earn her trust, learn more of her, as well as to make it clear to all other prospective mates that she’s taken, and so on.” He glanced at Spike. “Don’t ponies have the same thing?”

            “Yes and no, it’s done more only for the sake of polite society and it sort varies on the region and the couple, plus sometimes some of the steps are more optional and not necessarily considered required,” Spike explained. “And there’s always a few that decide to forgo tradition anyway, and that’s okay too.” He shrugged. “But you can’t really expect Trixie to have known any of that though, do you? As far as she would know, the only things she’d need to keep in mind are the perceptions of her fellow ponies…in fact, that’s probably the sole thing she has been keeping in consideration, and probably the only big thing holding her back at this point, if the lovey-dovey smell is any indication…”

            “Again with the lovey-dovey smell!” Thorax complained. “What is the lovey-dovey smell?”

            “You’re not the only one with a nose that can detect smells that others cannot, or so I’ve recently learned,” Spike replied with a smirk, tapping his snout with one claw. “But my point is that it wouldn’t surprise me at all if Trixie hasn’t even stopped to think about that there might be cultural considerations to keep in mind from your side of the spectrum too.”

            Thorax grunted, gazing out the forward viewport again. “I suppose in a way I haven’t doing the same back for her, either,” he admitted. He groaned. “This is so complicated…why must it be so?”

            “It doesn’t, actually, or I don’t think it has to,” Spike remarked. He patted Thorax encouragingly on the leg. “You and Trixie have only been making it complicated, and I think it might be because you’re both equally afraid of committing just yet.”

            “Well…can you blame us?” Thorax asked. “There’s so much to overcome…sometimes I can’t help but think it’d be…wiser of me to not even take the chance and try, out of fear that I would only set myself up for failure because…really…we’re such different creatures and all…”

            “True, and that’s definitely something you shouldn’t just overlook,” Spike agreed. “But you know, at the same time, if you two are ever going to seriously pursue this, then at some point you’re going to have to stop overanalyzing it and just go with it. After all, if you two really do have serious feelings for each other—and it’s getting to the point that it’s even getting hard for me to deny that probably being exactly the case—then I think it’s not so much what’s on the outside that you two like about each other…but rather what’s on the inside that you two find so appealing…and in some ways, I’d like to think that’s even better.”

            Thorax sighed, feeling that telltale ache in his chest again, and he had a hunch that Spike had a point. “Doesn’t make it any easier,” he mumbled aloud.

            “Well, I certainly don’t think you two should rush into this either,” Spike commented aloud as Thorax suddenly leaned forward and over the ship’s wheel, squinting his eyes slightly as he peered out the forward viewport in front of him. “Don’t think I’m trying to rush either of you into this, because I’m not. Actually, I’d sooner think Trixie would be the one doing that, so I’d watch out for that. Because, you know, with Trixie…in the past, it seems like Trixie seems to act compulsively, and it seems like that was always a large part of what was always getting her in trouble in the past, so—”

            “Shh,” Thorax suddenly hushed.

            “Oh, c’mon Thorax,” Spike grumbled with a scowl. “I know you think of Trixie more fondly than I do, obviously, and I’m trying to keep that in mind and give her the benefit of a doubt for both of your sakes here, but that still doesn’t mean she doesn’t have—”

            “Shh!” Thorax suddenly shushed again, more urgently as he clamped a hoof to the dragon’s mouth without looking away from the forward viewport. He silently gazed out the viewport intently for a moment then abruptly grabbed the throttle control, throwing the Vergilius into reverse for a quick braking maneuver, pulling it to a complete mid-air stop, before killing the engines entirely, an eerie silence suddenly falling upon the air yacht.

            Spike gently removed Thorax’s hoof from his mouth, watching the changeling warily. “…Thorax?” he inquired cautiously, sensing that something was up.

            Thorax didn’t reply right away though, listening intently to the sounds of the area they now hovered in. There was little to hear, but nonetheless, the ambient noise of the region felt recognizable. Peering out the viewport and up ahead of the now-stationary airship, he saw the relatively spartan grassland they had been flying for some minutes now abruptly started to thicken into a visible barrier of trees about a half-mile ahead, their leaves beginning to turn for the oncoming autumn season…and were of a type he knew very well. Quickly, he reached over to grab the spyglass from its usual location, extending it and peering out the viewport at the horizon ahead of them. It didn’t take him long to find it. It was still more than two or three miles off and distant enough that it was obviously hard to make out all of the details, but there was no mistaking it.

            “Thorax?” Spike prompted again, a growing tone of worry in his voice.

            “Spike, you had better go and get the others up here,” Thorax replied somberly, lowering the spyglass from his eye but his gaze not looking away from the spot he had been using it to magnify. “We’re here.”