//------------------------------// // Chapter Three: In Which There is a Song, a Party, and a Lot of Algebra // Story: A Draconequus's Destiny // by TheOnlySaneDraconequus //------------------------------// Chapter Three In Which There is a Song, a Party, and a Lot of Algebra The next morning, Spike walked into the library. “Morning Draco!” “Morning Spike,” I said without looking around. “Did you sleep well?” I snorted. “I haven’t slept in three days. I did sleep for an entire day when I first got here, apparently, but I haven’t slept since. I haven’t even been tired. I don’t know what the deal with that is.” “Maybe you don’t need sleep. You are a Draconequus. Discord’s always hyper,” he said, rolling his eyes. “Hmm. That would do it. I’m kind of sad, I really enjoyed sleeping. I guess I just slept that whole day because I was injured. I’m also never really hungry. If I can’t eat, I’ll be heartbroken.” “Well, just because you don’t need sleep or food doesn’t mean you can’t have them,” Spike said optimistically. I sighed. “Try telling that to my brain at four in the morning.” “Just wondering, why are you sticking your head out the window?” “I’m watching this morning’s weather team.” “Why?” “Where I come from, things like the weather and the seasons just happen by themselves, without any help from anyone. Seeing that it’s all made by ponies, and kind of under their control is really interesting, I’ve never heard of anything like that.” Spike’s eyes grew wide. “You didn’t control the weather?! So it was like the Everfree Forest all the time?” I chuckled. “Something like that, yes.” Spike shuddered. “Weird,” he muttered. He then said, “I’m going to go make breakfast, try eating it! It’s pancakes!” he said in a sing-song. I chuckled. “Sounds good, thanks. Sometimes I don’t think Twilight appreciates you enough. I’ll be down in a minute.” Spike nodded, and headed down for the kitchen. I heard hoofsteps behind me. “Morning!” called Twilight, “Sleep well?” I rolled my eyes. “The next person who asks me that is going to get it. How are you? You were up late last night.” Twilight beamed. “I am great! I spent most of the evening after the dinner preparing a curriculum.” She clapped her hooves together with a bright smile. “I’m so excited! I get to teach a new student, and I get to learn about Draconequui!” “If you want to know more about that, I suggest you ask Discord, though he’s not exactly known for straight answers.” Twilight nodded. “I’m sorry about last night. Did Shining really tell you we were all deciding on a sentence for you?” I nodded. Twilight rolled her eyes, and muttered something unintelligible. She then smiled at me. “So! For your first official friendship lesson, I thought that you could help Spike make breakfast! I think he’d like the help and the company. Er, you can cook, right?” I smiled. “Yes, I can cook. I’ll get right on that, thanks for the assignment. You don’t waste any time, do you?” Twilight shook her head with a smile. “Nope!” I swear, she skipped out of the room, humming a cheery tune. I headed down for the kitchen. “Hey, Spike!” I sniffed. “Smells great, what is it?” Spike was stirring a big bowl. “Banana-oat pancakes. Watch out, I think I missed a few peels.” “I’ll keep an eye ou – WHOA!” THUD! I had, naturally, slipped on a peel, and hit my head hard on the wall. Spike rushed over. “Are you ok?! How many claws am I holding up?” I tried to focus. “Six?” I croaked. Spike shook his head. He then dashed off. I tried to clear the stars out of my eyes, to no avail. Twilight rushed into the room. “Are you alright? Spike told me what happened.” I waved a paw. “I’m fine, I just didn’t watch where I was going.” I rubbed the back of my head. “Ouch!” I yelped. Twilight grabbed my head. “That’s a nasty bump, I’m taking you to the doctor. Spike, keep an eye on things!” She then helped me to my paw and hoof. I stumbled out of the castle, trying not to squish her. “I’ve never been out of the castle, I wish it was for a different reason.” I stopped dead in my tracks. The street was full of colorful ponies, all staring at me, with their mouths open. I made out parts of conversations. “Is that -” “Do you see? With Princess Twilight?” “Not another one!” “The horror! The horror!” “EVERYPONY RUN!!!” screamed a mare near the front of the crowd. In a streak of dust, the street was empty. “Huh. You ponies sure are fast when you want to be.” I started walking, thankfully I didn’t need to lean on Twilight anymore. “Hey, Twilight? Do I count as a monster?” Twilight looked at me with concern. “Of course not! What makes you think that?” I shrugged. “Just a thought. I wasn’t expecting that kind of reaction from ‘The Friendliest Town in Equestria.’ Just because I can talk and walk upright doesn’t mean I’m exactly friendly. That reaction still hurt.” Something tapped my leg. “Muffin?” asked a voice. I looked down, and saw a familiar face, even though we’d never met before. “Thank you,” I said, taking the cranberry muffin, and practically inhaling it. “If you don’t mind me asking, I’m not sure what your name is.” She smiled. “It’s Derpy Ditzella Whooves. Some ponies mix it up, and call me Ditzy, or Ditzy Doo. I hope you feel better!” She grabbed her mailbag, and flew off. “Thanks!” I shouted after her, giving a wave. Twilight walked me to a doctor’s office, I went in, and walked up to the front desk. I smiled, but the nurse behind the counter just got more nervous. She was a bright orange unicorn mare, with a dark blue mane, and a stethoscope cutie mark. “Hello, I’d like to see a doctor about hitting my head,” I said in as friendly a tone as I could manage. She nodded. “S-sure. I just need you to fill out some paperwork.” She levitated a clipboard over to me. I sat down, and filled out the forms as best I could. When I was done, I was shown into an exam room. “The doctor will be right with you!” the nurse called. She then left the room, looking relieved. The doctor was a light brown stallion with a mop of curly hair. He was looking at the clipboard with my information. “So, Mr. Draco, what seems to be the prob – SWEET SUFFERING SUCCOTASH!” he screamed when he looked up. I grinned, and gave a little wave. “Hi! If I promise not to bite you, can I have a lollipop?” The doctor nodded nervously. He started shoveling lollipops out of a jar on the counter. “S-sure! Take as many as you want!” Twilight froze his hoof magically. She gave me a glare. “I’m certain Draco won’t actually bite you, right Draco?” I crossed my arms and huffed. “I can’t even make fun of myself anymore.” Twilight facehoofed. The doctor was peering nervously at me. “Well, part of the problem might be … the patient’s a Draconequus!” I gave a rattling growl. “One more pony reacts in a speciest way to me, I’ll snap. I didn’t exactly ask for this.” The doctor took several steps back. “I – I don’t really know how to examine you,” he said, sounding apologetic. “We don’t exactly get many spirits in here.” I gestured at myself. “Luckily for you, I’m not a spirit quite yet. I’m more matter than magic. I’ve got internal organs, and I’m physically in front of you. I just need a tune-up, and my head examined.” I snickered. “In more than one meaning of the phrase.” The doctor gave me the once-over. He placed his stethoscope as high on my chest as he could reach. “Breathe.” I did. He repeated this. “Well, your hearts sound fine.” I smirked. “You don’t exactly sound surprised that I’ve got two.” He chuckled. “You’re not my first patient with two hearts. That Doctor Whooves fellow who fixes all the clocks around town? He’s got two too. Came as quite a shock, I can tell you, but he said not to worry about it. Really nice fellow, he once sent me a postcard from his hometown. It’s someplace called Gallopfrey.” My eyes glazed over slightly. “Everything’s coming together. In one universe! All I have to do is find a version of the Starship Enterprise, and my life will be complete.”  Twilight looked at me like I had potatoes sprouting out of my ears. “What are you talking about?” “Sorry, one of my dreams just came true. In a roundabout way. I just had to travel to another universe to find it.” I laughed mirthlessly. “None of my friends back home would ever believe any of this.” “You had friends where you’re from?” asked Twilight. I snorted. “Yes.” I growled. “Just because my species is scary doesn’t mean there aren’t good people. I didn’t have many friends, but I wasn’t unpopular enough to have none. My friends were all crazy the same way I am. We liked the same shows, and they enjoyed my stories,” the brick wall showed up again, behind me this time. I gave it the evil eye before it disappeared. The doctor gave me a worried look. “Oh, you write?” asked Twilight, her eyes glowing. “I’m more of an aspiring hack,” I muttered. “Say Doc, what does it mean to have the same hallucination over and over?” “What do you mean?” “Whenever I hear or say certain phrases, usually involving chapters or stories, I see-” I stiffened, and my eyes went wide. “Oh, no.” I breathed. “What?!” asked Twilight. “NevermindIdon’twanttogothere!” I shuddered. “If it’s what I think it is, I’m in big trouble. How do Pinkie and Discord handle that?” Twilight rolled her eyes. “Judging your lack of sense, I take it you’re feeling better?” I nodded. “Yes, I did back when we started walking here. I’m fine now.” The doctor beckoned, and I bent down. “Hmm. There’s nothing there now.” “Oh, come on! He practically had a second horn!” Twilight said with exasperation. “Well, looks like you heal super quick. I can give you some aspirin …” “No, I’m fine. Sorry to have wasted your time. Oh, and terrifying you.” The doctor smiled. “Actually, you’re not so bad. At least, when somepony gets to know you. Have a nice day.” He then hoofed me a sucker. I laughed. “Thanks. Oh wow. Butterscotch.” As we walked out of the office, me with a sucker in my mouth and looking like an overgrown five-year-old, Twilight said, “You are absolutely impossible. You are aware of this, yes?” I nodded. “I’ve been called worse. I’m sorry I made you miss breakfast.” “I’m going to have to get used to foalsitting you. Full time. Sheesh. OK, then! Anyway, what did you think of-” She looked back, to find me stopped in the middle of the street. “Draco?” “That song! Gotta go, bye!” I then dashed off in the direction of the music, not noticing I was on all fours. I came to a large building that was the same brown and pastels as the rest of Ponyville, I assumed it was the town hall. A familiar song was playing, the hall was empty, so I took a seat. On the stage was a dark grey mare, her long black mane slightly done up in a bun. She was wearing a collar and pink bow tie. She was lost in the cello song she was playing, and in a moment so was I. I closed my eyes, and imagined seeing the music as color. When she was done, I applauded. She gave a start, and glanced at me. She then walked off the stage to meet me. “I … didn’t know I had an audience.” “Sorry, but that’s one of my all-time favorite pieces of music, and I wanted to hear it before it was over. Cello prelude #1, right? I’m tone-deaf, so I couldn’t tell you the key. Your playing is amazing, and I can tell you have a passion for it. It’s nice to get lost in music.” She blinked slowly a few times. “Ah, … thank you. It’s nice to meet somepony who appreciates the classics. Mr.?” “I’m currently going by Draco, at least until I find myself. Dubstep isn’t really my thing, I’ve got too old a soul. Sorry I startled you.” “I just wasn’t expecting it, though I’m grateful you enjoyed it.” She blinked again. “You’re a Draconequus.” “Guilty as charged. I can’t really help it. Thank you for the music.” At that point, Twilight ran into the room. “There you are! You can’t just run off on a whim! I’ve been looking everywhere for you!” “You don’t ever stop to appreciate something you love?” Octavia cut in at that point, “Princess, he was perfectly fine. He was just listening to me practice, I didn’t even hear him come in. He was very well behaved.” “Is the reason everypony treats me like a colt because I really do act like a colt that much?” “Yes. You do,” said Twilight in a neutral tone. “Right. I’ll work on my impulse issues. Shall we head back? I want to see how Spike and Starlight are doing. Thank you once again, Ms. Melody, and keep up the excellent work.” Twilight practically dragged me by the tails towards the castle. The few ponies who were back on the street streaked back into their homes. “You know, that’s going to get old really quickly.” I growled. Twilight rolled her eyes. I spotted Derpy on the street again, and gave her a wave. A voice in a nearby alley called, “Derpy! Allons-y! We’re late!” My eyes lit up. “Is that-?” Twilight stopped me in my tracks. “Easy tiger. I don’t think the Doctor would like you fanboying all over him. Though why him of all ponies, I don’t understand.” I shrugged. “In a roundabout way, he, or at least someone like him, is one of my heroes.” I heard a faint *Vworp! Vworp!* come from the alley. My ears and tails drooped. “What I would give,” I muttered. I glanced at Twilight. “Never mind. Not going to happen. Anyway, I’d just die. Let’s go.” Twilight looked at me cautiously. “It really doesn’t take a lot to flip you from emotion to emotion, does it?” “Eeeenope!” I sniffed. “Do you smell cotton candy?” “Ohmigosh! A new Draconequus! That is so cool! Can you do totally cool magic, like make it snow frosted cupcakes? Ooh! Ooh! How about you turn the oranges into gumdrops! Are you new to just Ponyville, or to all of Equestria, because I’ve never done a ‘Welcome to Equestria’ party before and that would be super-duper fun!” “Yes to the first, I’m a new Draconequus, I don’t know if that’s cool. No to the second and third, I can’t access my magic, and even if I could, I don’t think many ponies would like to be hit by cupcake rain. The fourth, all of Equestria, but please don’t throw me a big party, I have a lot of trouble at them.” Pinkie deflated like a popped balloon. Her eyes teared up. “You – you don’t want a party?” she whimpered. I sighed. “I wouldn’t mind a small one, but I tend to get really overstimulated at big ones, and that was before I had bat ears. Besides, I think you’ll be hard-pressed to find a pony who will actually attend, not many ponies around town seem to like me very much.” “I like you,” said Twilight optimistically. “Me too!” said Pinkie, “I’ll round up the villagers, don’t worry! Nothing brings ponies together like a party. One eensy-weensy party coming right up! Ooh! What’s your favorite cake?” I thought about it. “Variations on chocolate. Devil’s food. German chocolate with coconut frosting.” Pinkie gave me a sideways look. “Well, we have Germane chocolate with coconut frosting, but … not many ponies like coconut.” I smiled. “You’re the resident party expert, I give you my permission to do what you think is best. Gods know I know nothing about parties. Thank you very much. What time and place is it?” Pinkie thought for about two seconds. “The town hall at six tonight. See you then!” She pronked away, humming to herself. Twilight looked at me. “Not a party pony, huh?” I shook my head. “Good morning everypony!” called a soft voice. “Hello Fluttershy!” Twilight and I said in unison. We blinked at each other. “How are you doing today Draco?” “Could be better. I can live with my klutziness, but I would feel better if more than two townsponies would actually talk to me. How have you been?” “I’ve been good! The animals at the sanctuary are all doing well, and we got the cutest fennec foxes yesterday!” “That’s good.” “Hey! Slackers! We’ve got places to be!” said a familiar raspy voice. Rainbow Dash then streaked towards the ground, landing in the middle of all of us. She looked at me, but it was a less wary look than yesterday. “So, you doing any better?” I nodded. “Yeah, thanks. It’s just a lot to get used to. New body, new universe, and new people to scare … it’s just going to be a while. How have you been?” “Good. We’re training for a show next week. I might have an extra ticket, if you’d like to come.” “Thanks! The fact that ponies can fly amazes me, so I would love to watch daring acrobatics.” Rainbow smirked. “You strike me as a grade-A egghead. What’d you think of Daring Doo?” “Uhhh … I haven’t read them yet.” “You haven’t read Daring Doo?!” Rainbow exclaimed with horror. “Technically, I’ve only existed for three days. The library has a copy of the complete series, I will get around to it, I hear they’re wonderful.” Rainbow snorted. “They’re better than ‘wonderful!’ They are some of the most awesome, most daring, most exciting books ever written! You HAVE to read them!” I smirked. “Glad you discovered the wonderful world of books?” “Uh, yeah! It totally changed my outlook!” Rainbow leaned in conspiratorially. “You know, I’ve actually gotten to meet Daring Doo once or twice. She’s totally amazing!” “I’m sure.” At that point, Rarity walked up. I hurried over to meet her. “Listen, I am so, so sorry for what I tried to do to you and Spike, even if I really wasn’t ‘in my right mind.’ Is there any way I can make it up to you?” Rarity surveyed me critically. “Well … how are you at organizing things?” she asked, fluttering her eyelashes. “Pretty good. I’m a major neat freak, so I’ve found creative ways to organize my stuff.” Rarity jabbed a hoof into my stomach. “HA! You’re helping me to organize my Fall line at the Boutique tomorrow! I’m sure Spike and Sweetie Belle will appreciate the break this time.” I nodded. I heard someone walking up behind me. “Uh, howdy! I’m Applejack. Who in the hay are you?” I whirled around. “Uh, I’m, I’m Draco. For the moment anyways. Newest student of Friendship,” I said with a nervous grin. “Uh huh,” said Applejack quickly. “Well, ay honestly don’t what to make of having another Draconawhatsit running around loose. Yer not going to be a problem, are you?” I shrugged. “I think I am one already. Even without magic.” Pinkie Pie pronked over. “Oh, sorry, I forgot to ask, do you like cake or cupcakes better?” “Uh, cake. Thank you.” “No problem!” Pinkie beamed. “I think it’s totally cool that Twilight’s got a new student. She’s a super-great teacher, even if she is a little boring sometimes.” “Pinkie!” snapped Twilight. “Ooh! Hey! We should do a song!” “Oh, Lord, please n-” I was cut off. Rainbow Dash took the lead: If you want to know what’s awesome, I’m the one that you should call (Applejack) And Ay’m really looking forward to showing you this Fall (Rarity) If you want a sense of style, you can always call on me (Fluttershy) And I’ll always be happy to help you to roam free (Twilight) With your lessons and great patience you will find yourself at last (Pinkie) And I’m here to help you have a blast! (All together) In time you will find the magic that’s within                       In time you will find just where you’ve always been                      We’re here for you, if ever you need a friend                      As friends we’ll stick by you, ‘till the very end!!” They looked at me expectantly. “OK, big points for the on-the-fly rhymes, but how did you get the dance moves down?” I asked. Twilight coughed. “Draco, that’s your cue.” My ears flattened as my eyes widened. “Oh, no! No way! I don’t sing!” I was given two glares, and four sets of puppy dog eyes that would have cuted Darth Vader to death. “ALL RIGHT! I’LL SING!”             I know I’m not the coolest, the kindest, or the smart             I’m not a great worker, even with the extra heart             I know nothing about fashion, even less of party trends             But thanks to all of you, I’ve now got such good friends! I stood there, panting. “Blech. Don’t ever make me do that again.” Twilight put a reassuring hoof on my paw. “You … get used to it. In time.” “I truly, truly hope not.” “Well, I thought you were marvelous! I love what your voices do when you sing! It’s beautiful!” I looked at the steps of the building behind me, and saw Discord, holding a steampunk-esque camcorder. “You didn’t!” He smirked. I got down on all fours, and lunged towards him, actually making the leap, and knocking into him. “GIVE ME THAT CAMERA, YOU INTERDIMENSIONAL PEST!” I roared. We tumbled for a moment, but he held the upper talon. “What, does your reputation really mean that much to you? Look, you’ve already got eight ‘likes’ and a retwit!” “It’s ‘retweet,’ and Equestria doesn’t have an internet, so you had better be lying.” “You’ll never know!” “Jerk,” I muttered. I then spotted a pink mare with a yellow mane and a lily cutie mark trying to sneak past. She spotted Discord and I, and fainted dead away. I growled. “Do ponies really think that just because I’m a Draconequus now, I’m going to turn Ponyville into the Chaos Capital of the universe?!” “If you could, would you?” asked Twilight, sounding worried. I scoffed. “Nah. Chaos isn’t really my thing, unless it’s in the name of fun, or creativity. Technically, I bat for team Good, and team Order, but to be perfectly honest, I’m more on the side of balance than anything. If there wasn’t evil, good wouldn’t have a function. We wouldn’t be able to tell what good even was, and there’d be no point to free will, because we wouldn’t even have a choice.” I gestured at Discord. “Without chaos, the universe would be perfectly ordered, and would never change. Life can’t happen without at least some level of chaos to let it happen. Night, day, change, stagnation, magic, science, everything has something to balance it out. That’s one of the cool things about life.” Discord was staring at me with his eyes narrowed, and an eyebrow raised. “What?!” I asked. He coughed into his paw. “Nothing. Good speech.” He held up a scorecard of pickle out of Pi. I rolled my eyes. “Well, it’s been fun everypony, but I have to go! Oh! Before I forget,” he said, as his head bounced away from him, “by direct order of the Council, I’m supposed to teach Draco here about magic.” “Wonderful,” I growled. Discord continued, paying me no heed. “Of course, the only magic I’m actually good at is chaos magic, which might not work for you. There’s only one Spirit of each concept.” He caught his head, and snapped it back into place. “T.T.F.N.!” He said, bouncing on his tail, and rocketing away into the clouds. I sighed. “Of all the mentors, in all the universes, in all creation, I get stuck with him.” Pinkie started to play As Time Goes By, a fedora on her head. I didn’t bother to ask where the piano came from, I didn’t want to know. “Well, it was nice to meet everypony, but I’ve taken up enough of your day. I guess I’ll see you all tonight, and I’ll see you tomorrow Rarity. I don’t sleep, so forgive me if it’s too early. We’d better head back, I’m sure Spike and Starlight are worried.” “Bye now!” called Applejack. “Good luck!” added Fluttershy. Twilight walked me back to the castle. “So, you OK?” asked Spike. “I just broke my pride in about three places. Give me a cast and I’ll be fine.” “So, are all Draconequui klutzy without magic, or are you and Discord an exception?” asked Starlight with an evil grin. “I’ll need more data to confirm or deny that hypothesis. I’ll let you know, when and if I ever find out.” Spike rolled his eyes. “You and Twilight really deserve each other,” he muttered. “What’s that supposed to mean?!” we both snapped at the same time. We then both laughed. “Yeah, you might have a point there.” I said. “Shouldn’t you mortals all get something to eat?” They all rolled their eyes. “Actually, I made hayburgers, just the way Twilight likes ‘em,” said Spike. Twilight’s eyes lit up. “Pass, I don’t think hay is ever going to sound good. Do you have any eggs?” “Yeah, in the icebox, third shelf down.” “Great! See you all in a second.” I rushed down to the kitchen, and scrambled some eggs, adding cheese as an afterthought. As I brought up my plate, Twilight said, “So, you like eggs?” I nodded. “Yeah, I’m an omnivore in both lives. Living in an entirely vegetarian society is going to take some getting used to. Bacon would go great with these.” “What’s bacon?” asked Spike. “I’ll … tell you when you’re older. So, Princess Sparkle, now that we’re actually eating, what’s next on the agenda?” After a few messy bites of her burger, Twilight said, “Well, your first friendship lesson didn’t go as planned, so I thought we’d start on magical theory after lunch. It’s not as if that can blow up in your face.” “AAUUUGHH!” I dove towards the table, and rapped both sets of knuckles on it four times. I turned to face Twilight with wide eyes. “Never say things like that! Didn’t they ever teach you basic superstition? It’s tempting fate! I have proof!” Twilight rolled her eyes. “I’m sure it will be perfectly fine. Eat your eggs, and we’ll get started. I’m glad you’re eating.” “I’m not hungry, but I think I want to eat, so I thought I’d try it to see if I get hungry.” After working that sentence out, Spike asked, “Are you always this weird?” “You have no idea…” I wolfed, or in my case, chimeraed my eggs down, and waited for everypony else to finish. Twilight pulled me back into the library, and set me down at a study table. She levitated some of the biggest books I’d ever seen over. “Now! These range from ‘basic spell theory’ to ‘advanced transmutation.’ I thought I’d start by having you just dive in, and see what you can grasp.” I cracked open one of the beginner books. I turned several pages over. “This … is … all … math …” One of my voices took a little longer to trail off. Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Of course it is! Magical theory is heavily rooted in strict formulae. It can take years to master, which is why most ponies don’t major in it. What did you think magic was, just pointing and going ‘whoosh?’” “Something like that. If this is so complicated, then why can foals do magic so well, and to such chaotic results?” “You do know that there’s a difference between theory and application, right? Since you can’t do practical application, which most ponies are born with, I thought I should teach you the theory, and see what that does. It might help you to see how to unlock the application part of magic. You can do math, right?” I examined the pages again. “Most of this, yes.” I snickered several times. “What’s so funny?” “No calculators. I’ll have to learn how to use an abacus. Could that be lesson number one?” Twilight beamed. “Yes! At last, somepony who sees its value! I’m so glad you think it could be useful, I’ve been wanting to teach somepony for years!” “Happy to help.” “Wait right here, I’ll go get my lecture notes, and a blackboard. I just knew having a pre-prepared lecture would pay off some day!” She streaked out of the room. I sent a silent prayer to any gods listening. I’ve always known you lot have a strange sense of humor, but sentencing me to advanced math homework on top of everything else you’ve done to me is just cruel. I’m sure you know what you’re doing, but … I still don’t know why you did this. Twilight returned to the room, dragging an abacus and a blackboard behind her. She also had a large stack of flashcards and paper, and some pencils. “So, to begin, the abacus is a calculating tool, dating as far back as …” I took notes as best I could, but six hours later, even with trying the abacus out, my eyes were glazed over. I shook my head, and glanced at the clock. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but, shouldn’t we head over to the party?” “Oh! Yes. Sorry about that, I tend to get a little ‘too involved’ in my lectures. Do you understand what we covered?” “Actually, yes. If I have more questions, I’ll ask. Shall we go?” Spike walked into the room. “C’mon Twilight! We don’t want to be late!” “Coming!” she called. I stood up, and stretched from my ears to the tips of my tails. I could stretch in ways that shouldn’t have been possible if I had a skeleton, but it didn’t seem to bother me. We walked over to the town hall, which was quiet and dark. I turned my ears around towards it, but could only hear some rustling, and maybe some breathing. As we walked in, the lights clicked on. “SURPRISE! Welcome to Equestria!” everypony in the room called. Pinkie hopped onto a chair, and tied a blindfold around my eyes. She then spun me around eight times. “Pin the tail on the pony! Dead ahead cap’n!” I wobbled over to the wall, and twitched my ears. I let out a small click, and heard where it echoed off of the closest point of the wall. I stuck the tail on. “Aww! That’s cheating!” said Pinkie, pretending to be sad. I took the blindfold off. My eyes widened, and my tails twitched. “I thought you said this was going to be an ‘eensy-weensy’ party!” Pinkie shrugged. “Some ponies said they wanted to invite their friends.” “ Pinkie, the entire town’s here!” I then facepawed. “Right. I’m in Ponyville. This is a small party. Thank you.” “Aww, it was nothing! Who wants cake?” The assembled townsponies cheered. The music started, and some ponies began to dance. I watched with interest. Pinkie brought a slice of cake over to me. “Peanut butter filled chocolate with cream cheese frosting! I hope that’s ok.” “Sounds great, thank you.” I took a bite. “Sweet heavens, this is amazing!” “I’ll tell Mrs. Cake. Aren’t you going to join in?” I scanned the room. “… In a minute. I’m just not used to this kind of thing, but thanks for putting it all together.” “Wellll, if you don’t want to dance, there are games.” My eyes lit up. “I love games! Let’s go!” I swallowed the rest of the cake in one bite, and dragged Pinkie over to where I could see some games. “Wanna play Twister? I’m a level three champ!” Pinkie sang. “It. Is. On! I’ve been meaning to see what I can do!” Pinkie and I set up, and began the game. While I could twist around like an overgrown hose, Pinkie was surprisingly elastic herself. When “left hoof on red” was called, I tripped over one of my tails, and landed face-down on the mat. “Great job!” called Pinkie. “Wanna play again?” “Nah. I think I’m going to go get something to eat. Great game, it was a lot of fun.” Pinkie smiled. “I knew you’d like it!” As I headed over to the dessert-covered buffet table, I heard an angst-ridden sigh. I looked over my shoulder, and saw Spike staring wistfully out at the crowd. I followed his line of sight with my eyes. Then, I got a wonderful, awful idea. I tapped Spike on the shoulder. “Follow me,” I whispered. Spike followed me as I snaked through the crowd onto the dancefloor. When I reached my target, I bowed formally. “Madame Rarity, would you care to dance?” Rarity looked at me with surprise. “Uh, yes. Thank you.” I grinned evilly. “Great! Spike would too! Have fun you two!” I disappeared in the direction whence I came. Rarity stood with her mouth open. She then laughed heartily. “He’s about as subtle as a parasprite invasion, isn’t he?” Spike chuckled. “Yeah.” He rubbed the back of his head. “Do you? Want to dance, I mean.” Rarity smiled. “Actually, I’d love to darling!” They took to the floor. As I was loading a plate with three different kinds of chocolate, I heard Fluttershy ask, “Enjoying yourself?” “Surprisingly, yes. I am. It’s nice to loosen up a bit, even if it is too crowded and noisy, but, I think I’ll live.” “Glad to hear it!” The party continued into the wee hours. About one o’clock, I tapped Twilight on the shoulder. “I get that the party’s for me, but I think I’m going to sneak back to the castle. I’ll be sure to thank everypony. I have a lot of homework I want to start on, and I technically owe Rarity my soul at this point, so I want to get an early start on working that debt off tomorrow.” “Not tired, are you?” asked Twilight with a smile. “No, just a little sore. I’ll see you when you get in, or tomorrow morning.” “Bye now!” I snuck out the back door, and legged it towards the castle, and the safety of the library. When I got there, I started to read and copy one of the ‘basic spell theory’ books. Ah, the joys of fractal magic. Fun fun fun! I thought of a cellist, and a mailmare, neither of whom thought I was a monster on sight. I smiled happily, and curled up in a chair to get some reading done.