//------------------------------//
// Wanderling's Floosh Out the System (Super Trampoline's "We Are Stars! Floosh! Shine, Young Backwards Baseball Cap!") 
// Story: Never the Final Word (Vol. 2) 
// by FanOfMostEverything 
//------------------------------//

Rarity was vaguely aware that she was babbling as they cantered towards the Castle of Friendship. She supposed it was the shock. To have such a wonderful afternoon marred in this way by an accidental poisoning of all things! Why, anypony in her position would have been equally aghast.

"Oh, I am so glad I didn't take the tea," she said, probably for the seventh time. "To think what would have happened to young Apple Bloom...!"

It was too awful to consider.

"Small bodies are so vastly more affected by dangerous substances, after all. Oh, I hope Spike was able to corral them..."

The paramedics stayed silent. They'd replied three times already. Rarity didn't slow down as they approached the doors, but instead flung them open as soon as they came within her telekinetic range. She dithered for a moment in the hall, prancing in place. The paramedics almost barrelled into her.

"Ah, ah, so many similar corridors!" Her ears flicked. There was a distant clanging noise, and a drakish shout. She darted to the left. "This way, quickly!"

Now that the unicorn had gained her bearings, she led the paramedics through a number of twists and burst into the kitchen where the day had gone so horribly wrong. Applejack was in the corner, a spoon in her mouth, tapping it viciously against the crystalline walls. Bubbles of laughter spilled from around the spoon's handle, from between clenched teeth, and the orange mare's eyes were unfocused and glowing a mildly alarming shade of puce. She was muttering something muffled by the spoon at every blow... for all intents and purposes it sounded like 'pew pew pew'.

Spike had Twilight's tail in his claws, and was doing his best to pull the alicorn away from an open flame that was burning in the middle of the room. Its source seemed to a wooden breadboard, and Twilight's equally puce-emitting eyes were staring directly into it. A purple hoof reached forward. The dragon yanked the tail. Hooves slid back over the smooth floor with a grating noise that Rarity could feel in her jawbone. Twilight frowned sadly. "Floosh."

The paramedics took it all in. Sighed in harmony. Then one of them snatched up the jug of water on the table and doused the flames. Twilight tilted her head. "...Floosh?"

"Are they going to be alright?" Spike wrung his hands together, and glanced at Rarity. "Is Apple Bloom okay?"

"Oh yes, Spikey-Wikey. She only had half a cup and they have her in recovery now," Rarity watched one of the paramedics approaching Applejack, who had somehow abandoned her spoon in favour of a small bag of potatoes. A potato flew through the air and hit the wall on the opposite side of the room. "The most difficult part here will be to get them to agree to go to the hospital while in this state."

"A survivor! You'll nevER TAKE ME ALIVE!" Applejack screeched suddenly, adressing the empty air to the left of the paramedic. She bit down on one of the raw potatoes, and then brandished it at the space-to-the-left-of-the-paramedic. "See how ya like my grenade! I'm takin' ya down with me, ya varmint cat sonuva queen!"

Applejack leapt forwards, wrestling with an invisible foe. Then her body jerked.

"Dang..." she whispered. "Jus' enough time left t'know I'm right done fer... accursed grenade jus' weren't s-strong en-enough..."

She lay still.

There was a moment of silence. The paramedic prodded her.

"I think she just hallucinated dying," the paramedic said, one eyebrow raised. "At least she'll be easier to take back to the hospital."

Twilight, in the meantime, had begun to cry softly. "It's all gone. The floosh has consumed it. I was foalish!"

The other paramedic made shushing sounds and patted the princess' back. "There there, why don't you come with us?"

"Are we going to replace it?" Puce eyes blinked up at the paramedic.

"Yes, sure, just come with me." The paramedic's voice was soothing, and soon enough both Twilight and Applejack were on their way to Ponyville General.

Spike and Rarity stared at the teapot. It shone back at them rather innocently. And puce-ly. The teapot had been blue, to begin with.

"I suggest," said Rarity. "That you go back to the store-brand blends."

Spike nodded. "And I probably need to tell Ember that the Traditional Dragon Tea-Crystals shouldn't be given to ponies. Ever."

"Wise." Rarity said.

There was a long pause. Rarity stared at the five teacups. She hadn't had a sip.

"Wait." Rarity said. The unicorn gulped. Spike raised an eyebrow.

"Where," she said, cringing slightly. "Is Starlight Glimmer?"

The castle began to vibrate.