The Rock in the Gulch

by Tatsurou


Treats and Tricks

Grif did eventually find himself a pick-ax to use to dig up the gems he'd found, though it looked oddly...blocky. "Huh, that's a weird shape for a pick-ax," he mused as he examined it. "Still, pretty light-weight, so it should be easy enough to use. Looks like a good strong blade, too." Holding it in both hands like a gun, he made his way over to the vein of gems he'd spotted. "Well, I have no idea what sort of gems these are, but it should be easy enough to get them out..." He struck the wall a few times, and gems and rock popped out as a block shape was carved into the rock wall of the canyon. Grif hesitated as he collected the gems and rock. "Okay...I want to say that mining shouldn't work like that, but there also shouldn't be talking baby ponies that eat rocks, and Simmons did suggest the natural order didn't apply anymore...and this means I get to do heavy labor and be lazy. Not gonna think about it." He happily proceeded to continue whacking away with the blocky pick, digging out rock and gems that he gathered for later use.

He happily continued his easy digging, barely noticing how deep he was getting until it started to get dark within his makeshift mine. However, switching on the light on his helmet solved that, and he continued. "Man, I had no idea mining was so easy!" he marveled as he continued. "And I'm not just finding the small gems anymore. I don't know what I'm going to do with half of this stuff, but I'm sure it'll be useful! Or I can just give it to Maud and she can find a use for it. Kids need a hobby, after all. ...wonder how Kaikaina would have turned out if she had more hobbies. Definitely don't want Maud going that way. She's just...too tiny and precious..."

"HSSSSSSS!"

Griff spun, pulling out his weapon and firing as he heard that sound. He stared as a bright green creature that looked like some sort of mushroom on legs froze as the paint stuck to it. "...okay, definitely should have gotten the live ammo before doing this," he murmured as he tried to calm down. "I have no idea what sort of creature this is..." He paused as he noticed it was...oddly blocky. Curious, he struck it with the blocky pick, and the creature fell apart into dynamite. "Sweet! I can use this stuff to resupply the base, too! Wonder if I can find a cookie monster down here, too! Maybe I should see about making a table to put this stuff together on. I don't have that many paint bullets left in the clip..."


Sarge paced angrily back and forth, while Simmons did make work assignments around the base. "Where is that slacker?" Sarge demanded finally. "It shouldn't take that long to dig out some gems, even if we don't have a pick and he has to do it with his bare hands!"

"He's probably dug just deep enough that we won't see him and curled up for a nap," Simmons groused irritably. "Do you want me to go look for him, sir?"

"Negative!" Sarge declared loudly. "I need to get at least one of you snapped into shape before next week, and that means starting you on every training regimen I can think of all at once! Now get back to triple curl jumping jack sweeping with a song, Simmons!"

"I...don't think that's an actual-" Simmons began.

"ALL AT ONCE SIMMONS!" Sarge bellowed.

"Yes, sir~!" Simmons sang out immediately as he proceeded to combine a fitness workout with a ballet routine as he danced with a broom. "Sweep sweep sweep, sweep sweep sweep..."

Sarge smirked to himself as he watched Simmons get to actual training, then turned to glance out the window...only to stare. "Where in Helheim did he get so much he needed a wheeled cart to push it in?" Sarge demanded in shock. "For that matter, where'd he get the cart?"

"What?" Simmons began, moving towards the window.

"ALL AT ONCE!"

"Sweep sweep sweep!"


Grif didn't question how he was able to build a mine cart out of the things he'd found in the mine, or that he'd been able to build tracks to push it on all the way out of the mine. He also didn't question that it held far more than the dimensions allowed, and yet still had things pouring out the edges. He'd been down there long enough he'd had to jury-rig replacement batteries for his helmet's light out of some electrical-conducting redstone he'd dug up three times. With what he'd seen down there, he wasn't going to question much anymore...except why they were here. That question seemed to be becoming more and more important with each new discovery. He also didn't plan to tell anyone where the mine was, or what all he'd found inside. He was still trying to figure out how he was able to make a bucket that could hold lava.

For now, he was just going to push his mine cart to Blue base and buy the Red flag off Maud. Much to his surprise, Maud was sitting just outside Blue base with the Red flag, seeming to be waiting for him. "You brought a lot," she observed idly.

"I found a lot to bring," Grif confirmed. "Figured I'd find something you'd want to trade the Red flag for. If you go to the other Base if your flag gets snatched, makes sense you're the one selling the flags back at other times."

"What did you bring me?" Maud asked, the slightest tilt of her head the only sign of curiosity.

"Well, I found quite a few gems of various sorts," Grif explained, laying out rubies, diamonds, emeralds, garnets, and sapphires. "Thought you might like to taste them, or just have them."

"Gems are not the same thing as rocks," Maud observed flatly.

"True enough," Grif allowed, clearing the gems away. "I found several different types of ore," he continued, laying out the various substances he'd dug up out of the mine.

Maud glanced at them, looking them over carefully. "No, not for the Flag."

"Alright," Grif allowed, clearing that away. "But I bet you'll love these!" He pulled out several spherical blocks - it was the only way he could think to describe the odd shapes he'd dug up - and held one up. "Looks like an ordinary geode unopened, doesn't it? But if you shake it..." He shook the sphere, and what sounded like liquid sloshed inside for a bit before the sound stopped. He then broke the geode opened, revealing crystals of all colors with a sugary finish. "Rock candy!" he declared, breaking off one of the crystals and eating it. "Mmm!" he purred happily. "And each color is a different flavor!"

Maud stared at the rock candy geode for a time. "...I do not like rock candy," she observed finally.

Grif blinked, caught off guard. "Oh...well, I also have-"

"I will take them," Maud declared firmly, grabbing the unopened geodes and handing Grif the flag.

"...really?" Grif asked in surprise. "But...you said you don't like rock candy."

"I don't," Maud confirmed. "But receiving it...makes me happy."

Grif stared at Maud for a time, then shrugged. "Fair enough," he allowed, sticking the flag into the mine cart. "I'll see about finding more of those next time I go digging."

"Okay," Maud allowed as she held the candy geodes close, watching Grif wheel the cart and flag back towards Red Base.


Sarge stared, completely flabbergasted as Grif laid out everything he'd brought back, more than enough supplies of all sorts to keep the base running and armed - once everything was processed - for years. "Wha...how...why...you?" he managed to get out.

"Grif, where did you find all of this?" Simmons demanded in shock.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," Grif allowed. "Let's just say you were right about the natural order, and leave it at that."

"...I'm gonna go back to sweep-n-sing fitness," Simmons groaned, turning to head to another room of the base.

"You do that," Grif allowed. "I need to build some chests to hold all this.